Mall Santas reveal kids' weird requests

Merry Christmas & Happy 300th Matt Rose Video!! 💥

[@Matt_Rose]

In the unlikely case you're checking these comments because you're wondering where your regular Matt Rose Monday is, fear not I haven't randomly vanished. Actually my son has trolled us all by being born several weeks early, taking us all by surprise and rather disrupting my editing. He is a lovely madlad and already has a good grasp of gibberish. I'll be back very soon once we're all settled here 💀💀

[@ReOrchestra]

@@Matt_Rose Congrats! Hope you, your wife and mini Matt are doing well.

[@Skull_Emojiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii]

kids can be crazy WAIT WHATS MY LINE OH YES 💀

[@HoofAndPaws]

Furby....Pt.....4....ТЕПЕРЬ ТОВАРИЩ. also, Congrast! get him a Furby! he will need it to summon the fubry demon, also. God bles!

[@glitterr]

confgratS!

[@gwenheuckendorf]

Congratulations! I hope he’s happy and healthy. ❤💀

[@ReOrchestra]

"A bushel of dead squirrels" sounds like an ingredient a witch would put into a pot while listing the ingredients and laughing.

[@KV-222_a]

I got a whole batch ready if you want some

[@omnirubix]

and then some bubble foam

[@WinterToast0]

fiendishly cackling, to be specific

[@Z5-XB]

with the pot turning from purple to bright green after throwing it in

[@locamiGI]

Bot

[@JonWilsonPhysics]

My little sister asked the mall Santa for "scotch tape" when she was 6 years old. She received like 6 rolls of Scotch tape, twisted it into amazing sculptures, and is now a professional artist. I'm very proud of my sister, if it isn't obvious.

[@ZenobiaofPalmyra]

d'awwww

[@lolz_x3]

HECK YEAHHHHHH XD

[@chermal7311]

Aww, dya guys still have the sculptures by any chance?

[@commanderfoxtrot]

Tape is VERY useful.

[@SageGarlandSingerSongwriter]

This brightened my day!

[@andrewtwilliams]

This video gave me 3 different film ideas. Imagine; 1. Santa gets the kids every peculiar gift they were looking for. Imagine Santa’s reaction. Imagine the parents reaction. 2. Instead of coal, Santa refers to the strange gift list and gives them something from that list instead. (Ex: a bushel of dead squirrels for naughty children.) 3. Once kids have become responsible adults, Santa refers back to every single wish they have made. Now that they are responsible, they will be given everything they wished for when they were little. Let’s hope they didn’t wish for something terrible.

[@renakunisaki]

I feel bad for the person whose kid gets a nuclear warhead for Christmas.

[@theresahaironthescreen]

Now an adult out there has to deal with a half of a cow.

[@princessmaly]

All of these sound like horror movies.

[@mayo0085]

something terrible like a bushel of dead squirrels or half a cow?

[@andrewtwilliams]

@@princessmaly It’s more of a Christmas miracle.

[@bigspaghettio]

"A flame thrower to exterminate all miracle whip" sounds like a fucking radical as hell album title

[@CaramelCandyCorn221]

something bon jovie would release

[@mpa-vr]

sounds like a Metallica record

[@blysghost6973]

We need a “That’s a good album name” video soon

[@m4rauder]

Sounds like an Exodus album

[@theskicker8856]

That’s the upcoming album for Spandex Lamb Tube! The tour for it should be great, with High! At The Pet Store being the supporting act!

[@naesala]

For those wondering what the amazon item at 5:57 is, it's an RC car. The link hasn't been active in a while so all that remains are price trackers.

[@Guys_XVII]

thank you! I couldn't keep trying to decipher kid handwriting in crayon.

[@タマニャ将軍]

yoo tysm for this

[@4nSi456]

thanks

[@locamiGI]

Bot

[@NewSonyWonderHappyMadisonFan]

@@locamiGI How are they a bot?

[@ExplodingDarth]

I didn't know mall santas were so judgemental, damn. These are perfectly normal things to ask an omniscient magic being who judges your every move - the least he can do is give a large volume of mayo and a flamethrower or a knee thumb.

[@HannahWoods-t9p]

They watch you year round precisely because they are so judgemental lol

[@dingus_maximus]

I love how the way this is worded makes it seem like a knee thumb is on par with a large volume of mayo and a flamethrower.

[@HannahWoods-t9p]

@@dingus_maximus Are they not? Lol

[@SofosProject]

This is exactly the kind of response I'd expect to hear from a certain friend. XD

[@dbone3356]

I mean. "God" is, so why shouldn't Santa be?

[@the-uber-goober]

Get ready for Infinite Wasabi with their new album "A Flamethrower to Exterminate all Miracle Whip" featuring their hit song "A Bushel of Dead Squirels"

[@BydgoszczLBS]

I would listen to that.

[@Dynamicdrifting]

Jameskii needs to make this

[@Diablo_Himself]

Bonus Track "Goat and a Sniper Rifle" is quite good.

[@AnimationEvi]

I need that

[@ickylynn6155]

I like their one song "One Clown Shoe"

[@WolfBitesAndSleepyGraves]

"The King of Alaska" sounds like a survival horror game you command a clan of survivors to conquer the monsters and reclaim Alaska for the humans.

[@HoofAndPaws]

i asked to be Queen of Russia and the Holy Romian Empier when i was six.

[@breadloaf2829]

Honestly I'd play that.

[@HoofAndPaws]

@@breadloaf2829 same

[@IanFife]

It's more like a Monty Python sketch if you ask me.

[@0_dearghealach_083]

That sounds badass

[@benw4409]

That kid who wrote the entire Amazon URL gets my eternal respect.

[@R.P-e2z]

Matt Rose: *reads out the entire Amazon URL* Also Matt Rose: *does not add 6,781 to 2,032*

[@LyrenaWithAnxiety]

Lame. They wanted whatever was on Amazon, not a stranger's respect.

[@MrGavoToYou]

Someone type that out. I need to one what he asked for.

[@Mr.MossyTeacup]

​@@MrGavoToYou The pinned comment actually says! Apparently it was a remote control car, but the link is no longer active?

[@jackgreenearth452]

And they didn't even need to, anything after the ref= is irrelevant

[@robyns.9946]

"A 3 liter bucket of mayonnaise and a flamethrower to exterminate all miracle whip." That kid has been tricked once before, and they won't let it happen again

[@jimb.7523]

Kid wants to raise Hellman's, apparently.

[@samdaugherty7585]

Glad someone else thought of that lol

[@melissacooper8724]

I don't blame the kid for wanting to get rid of Miracle Whip! 😂

[@jimb.7523]

Wait wait wait wait....Did the YT Gestapo delete my comment about the kid wanting to raise Hellmann's?!

[@LocalTiredArtist]

Better than what I did to my classmates for April fools. Vanilla pudding in miracle whip jar. I freaked out a lot of people that day

[@DiamondAppendixVODs]

that child straight up gave Santa a whole amazon link. props to the dedication, he must really want whatever that is

[@thingyofficial]

it's an RC car

[@NotUselessProductions]

@@thingyofficialprops to your dedication as well

[@silent4198]

@@NotUselessProductions no its the pinned comment LMAO

[@NotUselessProductions]

@@silent4198 oh

[@AJ-tiltagirl]

Love that the kid wrote it in a different color too like a hyperlink. 😂

[@PalisadePeryton]

After I die, I want to see a recap of the funniest and most entertaining moments of my life, marrated by Matt's voice.

[@Oscar23Studios]

"marrated" matt narrated

[@-octosquid-5203]

*marinated

[@LarryDeskPlant]

This would be amazing.

[@goofy-sorbet]

If he somehow outlives me, i would like him to travel from England and give the eulogy at my funeral

[@MatthewHyder-hr8ux]

Yeah, no offense, but I was thinking of the words narrated and marinated mixed together too. ^^; Or like... marriage/married. :p

[@bananaboi3454]

The single clown shoe one sent me, like not only did this kid ask for a clown shoe of all things, they didn’t even want a pair? Just one?

[@f1shy_y]

@@bananaboi3454 a lemonade glass

[@marinda653]

True clown behavior /j

[@darthbane5357]

​@@marinda653Screw the "/j"

[@PIZZAdayisback]

​@@marinda653i have no idea how this could be taken as a non-joke

[@ThePkmnYPerson]

They probably had a pair of clown shoes before but lost one of them.

[@Aimz360]

We need one for "strange things left behind in hotels". This beauty came on the radio 10+ yrs ago and my mam and I were howling. The 4 I remembered were: dentures, a glass eye, a prosthetic leg and a child.

[@Matt_Rose]

Thank you this has been officially added to the Ideas List!

[@KanesClayStuff]

A family on the way back home from a hotel -"mom have you seen my glass eye?" -"Mom, wheres my leg??" -"WHERES MY SON?!"

[@Aimz360]

@@KanesClayStuff My granddad took me and my little sister to the corner shop every saturday and one time he left little me at the shop. I knew my way back to my granddads but I stayed at the shop. I can only imagine what my mam and nanna were asking when they discovered my granddad returned with 1 grandchild instead of 2. We laughed about it and praised me for staying put.

[@petuniatherainwing1002]

I once was staying at a hotel room and behind the nightstand I had found one of those squishy toys that you can squeeze if you are stressed, and it was a pink donut with a cat face and ears. I took it with me and carry it around with me in my purse.

[@HoofAndPaws]

next time im hiding Mine kompf in the hotel room with a note that says "thou who found this is now incahrge of all Nazi movments around the world"- Adolf Hitler and just wait....

[@Antifearn]

When I was a kid, I once wrote an upset letter to Santa demanding him to “revert back to his younger age” because I had a massive crush on Kris Kringle from Santa Claus is Comin’ to Town and felt betrayed that the Santa who was visiting me was a fat, old bearded man and not a spry, handsome ginger with a pet penguin. Years later, I still have a crush on Kris (as well as Jessica) and rewatch that special at least once every December. It’s one of the most charming Christmas movies ever made. Edit: Congratulations on becoming a father, Matt! I hope you, your wife, Bamboo, and Mini-Matt are doing well and that 2025 is the best year yet.

[@Cacjams]

Wait 😂 I kinda have a crush on Kris too.

[@stacia2016]

No, you're right. I get it😂

[@LilWeeWeeGamin69]

Can't relate to the crush part, just here to say that it's a peak Christmas movie

[@j4keslvr]

that is so real 😭 kris and topper were peak and i would love to have them visit me in their prime

[@CrizzyEyes]

The real Santa was an Orthodox priest that gave money away

[@LucasAlmeida-dz5xh]

Once when I was little I wanted Santa to bring me the planet Jupiter. Just the entire planet

[@Cyb3r-man13]

I’m gonna try to read this comment in Matt Rose’s voice to see how he will read it!

[@sockthesaduofastudent5096]

Nice pfp

[@halfsine]

i wouldn't mind owning an entire planet, even if it's completely uninhabitable and doesn't have a solid surface

[@elliot4152]

Real honestly

[@EoghanDonnelly-m3x]

That doesn't make any sense to me. Why didn't they choose Neptune?

[@KingdomOfSaulo]

am i the only one who fucking lost it at the end? i imagined a kid going "MOOMM I WANT A BARBIEE" and then suddenly theres a bunch of sparkles in the sky and the barbie smashes through the window. i dont know why but that was absolutely hilarious.

[@aneutralopinion1712]

I asked Santa for oil and coal MULTIPLE YEARS IN A ROW because I wanted to be a business man.

[@paigeepler]

This feels very adjacent to my own childhood, except I was obsessed with solar energy instead of fossil fuels.

[@aneutralopinion1712]

@paigeepler I also love nukes at the time. I was like super into capitalism but the second I was able to use the internet I became a communist 🤣

[@mastermarkus5307]

@@aneutralopinion1712 I love a happy ending.

[@TheLegik1]

You should've just been naughty if you wanted coal

[@aneutralopinion1712]

@cumaproto9466 Believe me, I tried. I bit other kids, and was a debt shark. Santa just loves capital.

[@theblackunicorn261]

Worked as an elf when I was in secondary school, the number of children wanting human skulls certainly stands out

[@roryandbro1561]

.... how many were there

[@dewmilk17]

How many Answer the question

[@lamya.thefairy]

How many asked?

[@boopbeep2310]

omg meee🥰 when i was 7 i wrote a letter to santa asking for "computer game cds" and a small skull

[@HannahWoods-t9p]

Wait deadass

[@summersanta2441]

"bring batteries as well." Poor santa, he's been the scapegoat in that household you can tell

[@urgirl_maci]

at least these aren't the bad santas. one year i asked for chickens (rural florida, we raise chickens.) the santa said "santa doesn't deliver livestock." i was MORTIFIED. that year for Christmas, after i opened all my little presents, i was told to walk outside. there it was, one of those battery kid cars but it was a mini tractor, and the bucket was full of, you guessed it, chickens. my mom wrote a note saying something along the lines of "i was just kidding, I'm so sorry" we went to the tractor supply santa from then on. i got chickens 3 seperate years in my childhood, and i LOVED THEM. i still sometimes ask for chickens lol.

[@mastermarkus5307]

Stories like this really affirm my reasoning as to why I don't think parents should lie about Santa. I was really disappointed in my parents for lying in part because I truly appreciated all they did for me, and I wish they didn't essentially "try to hide it" just because everyone else was doing it.

[@damond4346]

glad im not the only one who wanted livestock for christmas (and tbh, i still do)

[@sidoniegabrielle269]

what a horrible santa but sweet thing for your mom to do to make up for it 🐓💕 also, "i want chickens" from a rural floridian kid is one of the most genuinely reasonable asks i've ever heard. tf was that guy's answer when a kid asked for something like a unicorn

[@nihtgengalastnamegoeshere7526]

@@sidoniegabrielle269 I guess the same answer works for both...?

[@KanawhaCountyWX]

That sounds like something a friend of mine from Northern West Virginia would do

[@Infinite-void908]

5:57-6:25, Matt seriously needs an award for being able to say and read all of that fluently in gibberish.

[@zibbitybibbitybop]

This is easily one of his better ones, I'm really good at reading gibberish and even I would struggle somewhat with this one.

[@Diablo_Himself]

Matt Rose graduated from "The Sims School Of Speaking"

[@z4yn_12]

Where does that link go?

[@Infinite-void908]

@z4yn_12 It's a timestamp link, it doesn't take you to any website. I just copied two specific times from this video and KZbin automatically highlights them.

[@Infinite-void908]

​@z4yn_12Those are timestamps, they won't take you to any website. I copied two specific times in the video and KZbin automatically highlights them.

[@dx243_]

5:23 imagine the response to this "rudolph has told me the answer is 8813! merry christmas" bc you can't really get more un-monotone than that

[@wishiwasmaren2608]

4:56 back when I was a kid, roughly 12 years ago, scented hand sanitizers were ALL the rage. Pre-pandemic, everyone just loved hand sanitizers to the point where teachers gave them out as prizes. If you had the little rubber things to make them dangle off of your backpack it was like a status symbol

[@alicered4198]

Yeah same. I had really sensitive skin and couldn't use them without my hands getting all red and itchy, so I made that my pointless childhood rebellion against society for however long that trend lasted.

[@goofy-sorbet]

im still big on those things!

[@calibricalypso]

I have a scented hand sanitizer attached to my bag, and the rubber part is shaped like a snowman. As a result I have no idea what scent it is, but it's quite lovely, whatever it happens to be

[@MistyInTheCloudz]

Omg I recently found a scented sanitizer I got when I was 8

[@hodgeelmwood8677]

Yeah, I remember seeing those things hanging off of everyone's purse or backpack. Funny how the status symbol became a necessity when 2020 hit!

[@Chocofr0st]

I can only imagine what that one poor Mall Santa was thinking when me, a petite little 8-9 year old girl, came up to him and asked him for: -Several tons of explosives -A pet lynx -Several books that I probably shouldn’t have even heard of, and MUCH LESS be reading at my age (I don’t remember most of them but I do remember asking for a copy of Call of Cthulhu, and Jekyll and Hyde because my “Cool” classic horror obsessed cousin talked about them a lot) And I also asked him to poison all the treats that he’d be giving to my brother. …not gonna lie, I probably wasn’t the most stable or normal child in the world.

[@paigeepler]

This is probably what encountering Wednesday Addams is like.

[@Chocofr0st]

@@paigeepler I feel genuinely honored to be compared to Wednesday lmao

[@Giacomo_Lee_Oakenstand]

It’s so weird and hilarious that the most normal thing on this list is the Several tons of explosives! I laughed so hard when I read that!

[@StarryVoid222]

This request feels like it was made by Rose lalonde from homestuck

[@Fluffymintthecat]

A pet lynx would be pretty cool though ngl

[@Lululukie]

The infinite wasabi one might have actually been me. I went through this weird phase/obession when I was that age where Cars 2 was my favorite movie, and the tow mater wasabi scene was the funniest thing ever to me at that age

[@eliza4042]

oh my god i’m so glad i wasn’t the only one lol

[@yellowbox9912]

“James, why is there a copy of Mein Kampf in your stocking?”

[@Vault111Cookbook]

*slowly raises right arm*

[@lofthouse23]

'James.... What's with the small moustache?"

[@Vault111Cookbook]

@@lofthouse23 Frau Thomas gab mir eine F für mein Kunstprojekt

[@ConnanTheCivilized]

@Vault111Cookbook Ruh-Roh! 😅

[@NintendoRaptor]

@@ConnanTheCivilizedRuh-Roh Raggy!

[@rowybowie]

The USPS has a program where kids write letters to Santa and people on the internet can buy it for the kids and have it sent to their house. I didn't buy anything since it was like 75% parents coaching their kids on what to write. One kid asked for a Chevy for her mom.

[@comically21wastaken]

thats just depressing

[@beeferbeefer]

i feel bad for those kids

[@hodgeelmwood8677]

The year I looked at that, every letter was asking for a laptop, an iPad, an iPhone, a desktop computer, or some other expensive electronic thing that I couldn't afford!

[@rowybowie]

@@hodgeelmwood8677 yeah, when I looked it was a lot of stuff like that and clothes. And like, I understand needing that stuff but there's no way a six year old is asking for a new wardrobe or an iPhone instead of like, a $10 doll or something

[@doofus-the-doofus]

thats just sad

[@EidolonEntropy]

I adore the kid's dedication to typing that whole Amazon link. I wonder how many years will pass until they realise they only needed up until the question mark.

[@paigeepler]

I was a sheltered homeschooled gifted kid in a VERY education-focused household with a strong emphasis on STEM, and the things I said definitely caught the mall Santas off-guard. When I was four, I asked for an electron microscope, which is literally the only thing I can remember ever asking a mall Santa for. I also went around asking every single mall Santa I met if they lived at true north or magnetic north, because nobody ever specified which North Pole it was supposed to be. My mother says I tried to talk to them about aerodynamics and the atmosphere too, but I don't remember that. They were always very nice and would just kind of revert to their script, but looking back at it, a preschool-aged girl trying to talk to Santa about physics was not something mall Santas are trained to handle.

[@AceJackWagon885]

as a gifted kid, I'm glad I learned about Mario & Wario for the Super Famicom over speedrunning the entirety of school

[@paigeepler]

@@AceJackWagon885 I got into video games later on, but to this day, I'm pretty sure I haven't even touched an SNES/Super Famicom. Outside of PC games, I pretty much started with the Wii.

[@jennawolfmusic]

okay young Sheldon

[@SonicRooncoPrime]

I'm just jealous. Sounds like you had a very exciting childhood over the other kids who just did mundane stuff.

[@goldenfiberwheat238]

Double d is that you?

[@EllpaFox47]

once i put garlic bread on my Christmas list i did in fact get a box of garlic bread in my stocking that year, and it was awesome

[@EoghanDonnelly-m3x]

garlic bread is good, all hail the garlic bread

[@S0D4ST34L]

@EoghanDonnelly-m3x ALL HAIL GARLIC BREAD

[@theresahaironthescreen]

The fact that you actually got it is oddly wholesome. I hope that you will have some wonderful garlic bread this holiday season.

[@LyrenaWithAnxiety]

All hail garlic bread (Every year I get a small jar of stuffed olives and it's still fantastic.)

[@rayh1238]

ALL HAIL GARLIC BREAD (it's one of the best foods imo)

[@Dale-ct5ru]

I asked for a bunch of bugs. Mall santa looked unnerved. My parents got me an ant farm and kit with butterfly eggs to raise monarch butterflies. Thanks Mom and Dad

[@sanashi27]

So many of these are weird and funny but the kid who wrote the entire url of the thing they wanted cracked me up. Total dedication there! I hope they got what he wanted. Also, Merry Christmas!

[@theresahaironthescreen]

0:57 Brother got run over by a reindeer Stealing a kid’s toothpaste Christmas Eve You can say there’s no such thing as demons, But as for me and OP, we believe.

[@aguywithayota]

I love this

[@JesusJavaJuli]

😂🙌🏻

[@nordnow]

lol

[@bcmoore671]

we'd had a little sip of whiskey and they begged us not to go but we forgot our Chlorpromazine and now I've been sent of to the psyche ward since the blow when they found us Christmas morning at the scene of our attack he had bite marks on his forearms and incriminating stab wounds on his back Brother has been killed by me and op he's Stolen both our toothpaste Christmas Eve You can say there’s no such thing as demons, But as for me and OP, we believe. now were all so proud of OP he's been hidin' outside the ward see him climbing up the building breaking glass and running past all of the guards maybe I'll do more, I dunno

[@goofy-sorbet]

genius!!

[@panzerdev]

When you come back for the next Matt Rose Monday, I'd like to see a video on ridiculous household rules. Congrats on your son by the way.

[@Infinite-void908]

"I've been medium this year." I might start saying this 😂😂.

[@Emot1V3]

I argue Matt’s Barbie stunt is even worse, because that was Chelsey, Barbie’s little sister.

[@海王星クショックス]

Emphasis on the "was".

[@hodgeelmwood8677]

Who the heck is Chelsey?? I thought Barbie's little sister was called Skipper! (Yes, I'm old!)

[@shippergirl1000]

​​@@hodgeelmwood8677 she has 3 sisters. Barbie is the oldest Skipper is the second oldest Stacy is the middle child and then Chelsea is the youngest

[@G4y_3m0_b34n]

​@@hodgeelmwood8677 I think she has multiple

[@ArtsCraftsandAnimatics]

@G4y_3m0_b34n Skipper, Stacy and Chelsea are the main three sisters

[@VraerynDaDragon]

I respect the kid that actually wrote down a whole URL.

[@iKadaj]

not a mall santa but my mom says when I was little (I don't remember this) that we passed a mall cop and I gasped and said in a voice full of wonder and amazement, "mommy, look! there's the terminator! O_O" and she said he was trying really hard not to smile.

[@AleksButtoniarz]

Matt Rose, your content makes me feel like you're the canonical god amongst humans. I hope you have a wonderful Christmas.

[@locamiGI]

Bot

[@AleksButtoniarz]

@@locamiGI [please pretend I responded with a clever comeback, some jaw-dropping punchline]

[@TheJettuce]

​@@AleksButtoniarz OHH WHAT A COMEBACK A TRIUMPH FOR THE AGES ‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️

[@locamiGI]

ENGLISH OR SPANISH 😈 mah bois: frozen 🥶 sus caseoh: moves CAN I GET A HOYAAAA? me: AYOO- 😳 Jonkler: Why so serious 👽 those who know:💀(only in balkans) 5 likes for part 2

[@ZeroGravityLoop]

@@locamiGI .. uh-huh. Why are you making a "story" after calling someone a bot?

[@ibexis]

That child that wrote they wanted "Lasagne" was for sure Garfield

[@helenbooth5109]

Honestly, this reminds me of that one old meme. You know the one, the "so what do you want for christmas? A dragon! Pick something more realistic. ( ). What colour do you want your dragon to be?

[@EmperorOfApathy]

10:22 love it when the wind hits the bottle top like this

[@somethingsandwich]

How did you even hear that? I had to put my volume to max to hear it 😅

[@mastermarkus5307]

@somethingsandwich I just had my volume at the normal level to hear the video and I heard it. Not sure what's so different between our speakers.

[@felixmckinney7132]

😮‍💨👌 Perfection

[@notafraidofchange]

@@mastermarkus5307 they’re probably either half deaf (like most people) or used external speakers.

[@DuoEditzYT]

I was wondering what that was

[@noob19087]

Fish carcasses actually work really well as a fertilizer. Tomatoes and peppers love it, it contains plenty of slowly releasing trace minerals and organic matter.

[@meeperbeans]

"zombies" is the most chaotic thing to ask for christmas.

[@luna_nova_09]

Maybe she meant a toy? Or she thought “zombies are cool” because she didn’t understand why zombies are dangerous? 😅 Funny either way.

[@rowybowie]

​@@luna_nova_09yeah, there's a show and movies on Disney channel called Zombies so I was guessing it was related to that. Idk when it came out tho so it might be too recent

[@ThatMemerDude89]

As a PvZ fan, I approve of this message.

[@hello-xm5il]

​@@rowybowie zombiez has been around for at least several years because I remember seeing ads for it when I was a kid The animated show is quite recent, though; it used to be live action

[@CoolCademMAnimates-fz1ui]

Im not a mall santa, but I work for a local TV channel and we have kids call our studio and talk to Santa. We've had kids ask for "war stuff", dating advice, and a 60-something year old woman asking for na vacation. We've also had fully grown men pretending to be a little girl. Oh ya, and then there was a kid who called just to say her brother drowned. All of this was broadcasted live.

[@Giacomo_Lee_Oakenstand]

Yikes. That must’ve been awkward.

[@CoolCademMAnimates-fz1ui]

@ it was, and even more so when the man pretending to be a girl called a second time on one of our other ones and we cut him off after we recognized him

[@nickrustyson8124]

This sounds like the most amazing shitshow ever, is there a copy?

[@CoolCademMAnimates-fz1ui]

@ don’t know. I’m not told what is recorded and what isn’t, let alone posted online.

[@nyctilia]

Makes me wanna be a Santa next year, just for all the hilarious things I might hear. Also I love kids. Maybe I’ll actually apply 😂

[@zacharyriley4561]

"My sister asked for a sibling, 9 months later she got me." "WHAT DID SANTA DO!?"

[@AceJackWagon885]

sliding through the snow on a one horse soaping sleigh *laughing all the way*

[@lofthouse23]

He knows when you're sleeping.....

[@nightterror6727]

"I caught mommy kissing Santa"

[@lukelyall5879]

@@nightterror6727more then kissing 💀

[@laurensweyn]

When I was young my parents took me to a mall santa and waited hours. When asked if I wanted anything for Christmas, I apparently said, "No, not really."

[@paigeepler]

This is SO CUTE.

[@majarini]

This is fantastic 😂

[@osakafromazumangareal]

imagine being the poor guy who has to deal with a molten blob of plastic smashing into his window

[@Scribblemations]

Too bad we don't have mall Matt Roses. I would love to take my kids to get a skull emojiiii with the big man himself

[@Matt_Rose]

My new aim is to become famous enough that Mall Roses are a thing 💀

[@WinterToast0]

⁠@@Matt_Rose i can fix you up a few holly jolly volunteers

[@camohere]

@@Matt_Rose Maybe in the future we can have Matt Rose lookalike contests.

[@ObjectyFOX]

​@@Matt_Rose SKUUULLLL EMOOOJJJIIII

[@slonk420]

I'm in. I'm too overweight to be believable, but I can drink like the Real One 😂😂😂

[@NintendoNerd64]

the dedication to writing out an ENTIRE amazon link is frankly impressive

[@krash184]

I wonder what the item was...

[@GTKCF2023]

​@krash184it was a rc car according to one comment

[@caitlinpenny7412]

My kids asked for lots of Kirbys. We - I mean Santa - obliged. Our house is now far pinker than I ever thought possible.

[@joshbostock4371]

I wanted telegraph poles. Yes, actual telegraph poles that carry telecommunications. I believe I asked a santa for them at some point. My dad actually made them too, out of wood and I was really happy to put them out in the garden with my wooden painted road signs that went with the road layout painted in the garden. I believe the reason was because I started going through a telegraph pole phase where I was interested in telegraph poles because I was a weird child!

[@ChiChiDoesStuff]

I’ll never forget that I wrote a letter to Santa the first year I went Vegan. It basically said “We left you vegan cookies because I don’t want you to get fat and die cause it would make all the kids sad.”

[@benbarlow9469]

That’s surprisingly wholesome considering how blunt little kids can be.

[@oldyosh]

Here's a video idea. What's the weirdest thing you've asked as a kid / your kid asked to you? I'll start: "Say, you had to go to Missouri, in a remote forest. When you arrive, you see a log cabin, and a pond behind it. You exit the car, and go to the pond. What would you do if Gordon Ramsey holding a cooked steak in his mouth, flew/ascended from the pond and landed in front of you?" wacky

[@beechild13]

"lasagne" is so real actually also that might've been garfield

[@Oscar23Studios]

gargueld

[@NintendoRaptor]

@@Oscar23Studioswho would win? Garfiedl 12 Lasagns

[@Oscar23Studios]

@owengill6687 grqrril3e

[@Yuki-e9r8f]

When I was 6 I sent a note to Santa saying “dear Santa. I want a plastic banana” and I got my banana? I remember my mom telling me I was jumping up and down excitedly over a dang plastic banana😂🤣

[@Vipero737E]

the kids who just wanted batteries included with stuff that needs batteries is so real for that

[@tamarriver3338]

0:18 Another one bites the dust

[@Th3nox13]

Dang thats true😂 now anything with three things happening with a 0.5 sec delay will sound like that to me

[@ThePugL0ver]

Jojo reference????

[@beddingfieldcoasters5778]

@@ThePugL0verno… it’s a Queen reference I hope what you said wasn’t a joke, I’m gonna look dumb if it was

[@ThePugL0ver]

@ it was a joke lol, in jojo the main villain of part 4 is Kira, and he has a stand called killer queen (also a queen reference)the author of jojo likes adding musical references. One of killer queens abilities is called bites the dust lol. So it is a queen reference, but kinda a jojo reference too

[@beddingfieldcoasters5778]

@@ThePugL0ver welp, now I look dumb… I’m still gonna leave my comment up in order to educate people on the dangers of not understanding a joke

[@roxygaming5968]

Merry Matt Rose Monday! I feel like the kid who asked for a "proper sharp" sword is a character from some old gangster movie that hasn't grown up yet.

[@paigeepler]

There's also a kid in Terry Pratchett's book "Hogfather" who is basically that kid. Pratchett was an excellent judge of what children are like.

[@Giacomo_Lee_Oakenstand]

Also in that book, the Santa Claus who gave that sword was actually Death. And he was just fine with it!

[@mammalianmolasses4724]

When I was 7 I asked Santa for hairspray and a lighter. My mother was confused but my uncles understood the assignment.

[@Karaemu]

4:55 THAT REMINDS ME in like 4th grade everyone in my grade was obsessed with scented hand sanitizers. We collected them and traded them like cards. I think there was a specific brand but I can't remember which. Funny to see there were other young scented hand sanitizer enthusiasts out there.

[@sarahjeanwinkler2540]

Bath and body works and they had the fancy little cases you could put on a keychain on ur backpack. I wanted to be cool but I only got like three of them and the popular girls had at least twenty in their collections

[@haybale287]

I remember this too. Around the time of Baby Lips, right?

[@Trapezoidiqal_Q]

holy shit, wait I think I remember this too!! I think it was those Bath & Body Works "pocketbacs" but like the old design of them where they were trapezoidal and shit, right?? I remember those being super popular when I was a kid, I completely forgot about them lol

[@Karaemu]

@@Trapezoidiqal_Q I think that's the one i'm thinking of yeah! Though they were selling rectangular shaped ones when we were collecting them

[@alm5992]

Did this happen recently or is your school completely messed? We traded Pokemon and YuGiOh cards when I was in school.

[@TwisterArchival]

9:48 Silly ol’ Matt exploding a Barbie doll tied to a firework 2 days before Christmas 😛

[@MistyInTheCloudz]

sid from toy story

[@StuffandThings_]

@MistyInTheCloudz This is what happened to Sid when he grew up. Explains the alcohol and fear of Furbies.

[@MinecraftGamerLR]

Toy Story: Rated R

[@xenay911]

Whenever I feel like I couldn’t have any weirder thoughts, Matt Rose uploads another video that absolutely exceeds my expectations.

[@Abbiegooberr]

EMERGENCY HOLLY JOLLY CHRISTMAS SITUATION‼️‼️‼️‼️ 3:56 “A not autistic dolphin” PLS😭😭

[@fairypink.]

Shiver profile picture!?!,?

[@OffTheHook017]

Omg Shiver Hohojiro from the funny squid game???

[@tomqrchives]

@OffTh3Hook017forgot what splatoon was for a second and i was like “that doesnt look like squid game…” lmao im dumb

[@expiredshady]

what will happen if the dolphin is autistic

[@inediblegummybears]

SPLATOON!!!!!!!!!!!!

[@IanFife]

I work in a store and look like Santa in his younger days, so needless to say I had a kid ask "could you tell daddy Santa to get me a chocolate coated grenade."

[@Bunnizx]

I distinctly remember i asked for a "ketchup sandwich" for my birthday when i was 5 or something. The guests looked perplexed when i actually got it.

[@mitchib1440]

05:49 this kid is going to be the world's greatest "batteries not included" protestor.

[@haumenic]

It’s been 22 years since the kid wrote that letter.. hope he’s doing alright

[@lazarusrat6159]

The kid wanting the three dead fish is so wholesome.

[@RandomInternetStranger]

To cut a long story short, I was born with what I now know is Antisocial Personality Disorder (it's a genetic thing that both sides of the family have). My lack of emotional thinking and the experience of my parents made me an eerily fast learner, and almost all of my energy went to the internet (I was home-schooled). Before I was even 6 years old, I'd already learned that you could sell organs on the black market, and found that lungs were likely the least detrimental. The poor mall Santa was asked this: "Could you sell one of your lungs and give me the money, please?" After a bit of silence, I said "I read that smokers can't sell their lungs, but I thought that Santa wouldn't smoke. *_Please,_* could you sell one of your lungs?" He quit right then and there. Worst day of my childhood, honestly. My parents were too entertained to stop me or even explain, so I went for like a full year without realizing what truly happened. Quite the event.

[@SawdustMusic-rd8mj]

0:26 “THIS ISN’T A PRESENT, THIS IS HUMAN TRAFFICKING” - Star-Lord

[@loreleiwhiteblade7919]

You read my mind

[@royalfranz6124]

2:20 Fun Fact: where I grew up, there's actually a milk brand called "Alaska". Maybe that's what the kid really wanted. 😅

[@RegentSergeyTaboritsky]

Hail the King of Milk.

[@MINPJ]

Or maybe he was from Liechtenstein

[@sepiasmith5065]

genuinely i hope you know your reading/voice acting is so fucking good it has me laughing out loud MULTIPLE TIMES and repeating it to myself

[@PrehistoricJunkFood]

3:42 Putting “I worked as an elf” right after that one was diabolical 😭😭

[@Brainz_In_Jars]

I remember asking Santa when he was gonna die…

[@LolLol-z9x7o]

💀👍

[@bloodwraith-m6j]

💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀

[@CurlyFromMouthwashing]

WHAT

[@ashen_roses]

That is not a bad question honestly. If I was a kid I'd ask too

[@painteater_]

According to my brother who knows a lot about mythology, Santa dies every year and he is reborn as another Santa. Kind of like in that Santa Clause movie where Santa dies after falling from a roof and leaves a businessman to inherit his role. I don't believe this though since there's no sources that I can find that even mention this belief. I think my brother just convinced himself that because of his wild imagination.

[@sidoniegabrielle269]

that link one unlocked several memories of physically writing out entire web links as a child. not for a christmas list, but i definitely wrote down some websites i wanted to remember with the HTTP:// and everything, and i copied a few links from emails by physically typing them out letter by letter instead of just clicking them. i was smart enough to identify spam links and block/delete them, but it took me awhile to realize i could just click the link to see the funny animal photo my aunt sent me... which honestly tracks with my general intelligence level across my life

[@MalloryHasCats]

I was obsessed with flying when I was a kid - not like in a plane, but like me, being able to fly like a superhero or a bird. And I thought MAYBE if I looked like a bird I would be able to actually fly, so I very seriously asked for a bird costume that could really fly. That was the last year I was allowed to see Santa.

[@LeoTruth2]

My dad was a mall santa, and i asked him if a kid ever asked him something weird and, a 5 year old boy came up to him, and my dad asked "What do you want for Christmas little man?" and he said for my sister to be on the naughty list💀

[@hoshimochi5702]

Matt, your videos are the perfect dose of comedy I need sometimes.💀❤️

[@mylittledarkworldjohn4289]

6:16 For some reason was expecting a cut to what this link leads to

[@WeirdWimp]

its a rc car BTW

[@DuoEditzYT]

@@WeirdWimpsend the damn link

[@WeirdWimp]

@@DuoEditzYT im not typing that. plus, even yt links make comments get deleted unless you are on ur own vid. i just heard it from another comment

[@DuoEditzYT]

@@WeirdWimp damn it

[@jaeyunpeach]

all i want for christmas is a matt rose video ‼️

[@Brizzle427]

I love how it's either the most horrific, unobtainable, morally questionable item or something you could grab from poundland.

[@ultimatechaosbeingmorphokn4102]

those kids asking for weapons are like IRL Calvins from Calvin and Hobbes. dude literally said and i quote from a strip: "atom bomb through grenade launcher"

[@DoodlingFreak]

The answer for the question at 5:22 is 8,813 incase you’re curious

[@Dylanthegreat2008]

It’s easy….. How people would so curious and not just do it?

[@ndrew_B]

Are you Santa?

[@Jader_0]

Wow Great use of a calculator

[@g_cracker7745]

GPS voice: “Turn left” “Hold on I have to go get my east driving Rolls Royce, be right back”

[@BallinJesus]

7:44 Sin city wasn’t made for ya💀

[@its.bubble]

🤫🧏‍♂️

[@46_10]

ANGELS LIKEEE YOUUU

[@ObiWanBillKenobi]

Wow! I forgot how unbridled imagination really is when it’s genuinely unbridled! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I need to be this unconstrained in what I want!

[@atsunome]

6:37 Actually, given the context of clothing items, the kid probably means ‘pants’

[@bobbobberson4295]

Yeah, you don't list off all the duck clothing and just insert stationary in the middle of it, smh, plus then he'd have a whole duck set but missing the duck pants and that's just cringe.

[@Pixelspear]

9:29 he wasn't worthy😔

[@MrGavoToYou]

Stop! Why is this so funny?!😂😂😂

[@arnoldschwarzenegger3755]

He was able to at least pick it up and throw it. Maybe he’s partially worthy? 😂

[@Pixelspear]

@@arnoldschwarzenegger3755 maybe he's meant to be captain america😮

[@EranMadeMonsters]

You just have to wonder what these kids were planning to do with such items. (The goat and the sniper rifle, does the goat use the rifle or is the goat target practice?) Mall Santas everywhere, thank you for tolerating our nonsense.

[@HairyHariyama]

Maybe the sniper rifle is to protect the pet goat from predators.

[@ConnanTheCivilized]

@@HairyHariyama I hadn’t considered that angle! Kids are so creative!

[@KCYGAFPWLOPCSMTTNHF]

"I want a flying DeLorean with a capacitor!" -Some kid I met

[@Meringuesnake]

I never asked SANTA for anything unless it was a generic toy or tool. That said, those got interesting. - A roll of zebra striped duct tape (I had no reason to believe it existed, but OBVIOUSLY Santa could have one made) - A melon baller. - Paper straws (before they were trendy!) - …And this year was a pregnant snake plush (which does exist and is adorable)😊

[@paigeepler]

Honestly, I can see the melon baller. When I was a very small child, I used to have "watermelon parties" with my grandma where we'd eat watermelon at her house, and I was a very neat eater so I always used a melon baller. That melon baller sort of became a symbol of my connection to my grandmother, and I was very sad when we had to get a new one.

[@Nowheres_Channel]

When I was little I asked for this one really specific lego set I had seen in store. It was a ghost train set (obviously meant for halloween) and *to my knowledge at the time* it was the only lego train set ever. I can still somehow remember the guy giving me a weird look.

[@plebisMaximus]

There's been quite a few Lego trains. I knew a guy who had a couple as a kid. You still have your chance to build lego rails lol

[@Nowheres_Channel]

@plebisMaximus well I'm sure as hell aware of that now 😂. I've built some of my own MOC's.

[@plebisMaximus]

@@Nowheres_Channel My brain had filtered out the "at the time", I'm a dunce lol.

[@calcutt4]

"You can't give her that, it's not safe!" ɪᴛ'ꜱ ᴀ ꜱᴡᴏʀᴅ, ɪᴛ'ꜱ ɴᴏᴛ ᴍᴇᴀɴᴛ ᴛᴏ ʙᴇ ꜱᴀꜰᴇ

[@paigeepler]

I love finding all the Discworld fans in the comments.

[@StuffandThings_]

9:47 Oh so _this_ is what happened to Sid when he grew up! The alcohol and weird fear of Furbies makes SO much more sense now.

[@BulletsfromMCRX_x]

I used to work as a mall Santa so I just thought I'd share- About 2 years ago, it was my last shift and I was packing up, and this kid came up with his tired mum and just whispered in my ear that he wanted 'Syrup fog.' Whatever the fuck that means. Still haunts me to this day

[@coolkattcoder]

As syrup fog rolls in, and all the sweets start snarling; it is time, for the candy crusade to commence.

[@BulletsfromMCRX_x]

@@coolkattcoder YES 👏

[@aiiiia9971]

Thank you Matt Rose, you never fail to make me laugh. I hope your Christmas is filled with laughter too

[@f1shy_y]

5:57 bro wants an amazon website… HOLYSHIT IT KEEPS GOING

[@DelliGaming]

Honestly, I respect the dedication of writing out an Amazon link in crayon

[@theultimateamazingsleepyko6687]

💀

[@ValentinaxEdits]

Someone type it out to see what they want

[@Mischief_Manager93]

If I could be bothered to do so I'd look up the link to see what they wanted

[@berrypepperroni7708]

@@Mischief_Manager93 i shall bother you to do so