10 Pregnancy "Warnings" People Wish They Knew Earlier

[@lesliecampbell8520]

I had an emergency C and when they went to run me out of the room. I was so sick I couldn’t think to ask for explanation, one of the residents on my case stopped everyone to explain to me what was happening and assured me that everything was going to be ok. I’m so grateful for that resident. In a scary moment she took the time to explain what was happening.

[@lostcontrol1981]

I lost 30 pounds with hyperemesis - I started pregnancy at 145 pounds and dropped down to 115 pounds. I was teased at my doctors office - they asked if I needed directions to the local Dairy Queen. They also made other pregnant women cry telling them they were gaining too much weight and were just pigs. I was horrified by the way this OB/GYNs office treated patients (he eventually lost his license after his malpractice caused a pregnant woman’s death due to eclampsia). It taught me to always trust your instincts - I thought the doctor was a huge jerk - I should have left him earlier. (I also have a long story of how I had a massive DVT that went undiagnosed that very nearly killed me. Compared to that the hyperemesis wasn’t that big a deal!) Im in Canada BTW. Getting an OB/GYN here can be difficult - and I was really stuck with the one I was assigned to

[@iylannaslife]

Jeez, I’m so sorry you went through that! I was sick every time I drank water, told my doc and got a script. Nothing to it. No one should have to deal with what you went through!

[@Nevertoleave]

You must be from a small community then. I live in a small Canadian city and if at any point I want a different OB/GYN I can just ask my general doctor to refer me somewhere else

[@RedRoseSeptember22]

That's horrible :( I'm so sorry you went through that and OMG the poor woman who lost her life...I hope her family and friends are at peace now.

[@Hiforest]

I had HG in the UK with my last 2 pregnancies, it lasted until I was at least 6 months pregnant. I had to be at the hospital daily for injections to stop me throwing up long enough to eat and drink something (I lived close to the hospital and the pill options hadn't helped at all). I was a uk size 16 when I fell pregnant and a size 10 after I gave birth - it's no joke, I'd not wish it on anyone.

[@bendeywendy8065]

Holy crap! I'm so sorry that happened to you. That's dreadful

[@Wendelile]

Another "massive failure of communication" was after I pushed my daughter out (induced due to rapid onset preeclampsia) they didn't even put her on my chest like I asked. They called more people into the room and started pushing on my belly. I tried stopping them and asking what was going on, but I got no answer other than my arms being grabbed. Then my anesthesiologist (who did not seem like a friendly guy and was cussing earlier while putting in my epidural) said in a annoyed tone "and this is how women die in childbirth". After that I just passed out. I woke up in a different room where they had given be 4 blood transfusions and a plasma. I apparently didn't have a pulse for a few minutes because I bled out so much. And no one told me absolutely anything. And I couldn't see the blood. It was so terrifying when I woke up. Definitely a huge failure of communication.

[@casie6609]

That's horrible :( Glad you're ok.

[@katiekane5247]

Emergencies often result in poor communication but staff could do better in most cases.

[@stephaniehowe0973]

They were trying to save your life. They push to stop the blood flow

[@Wendelile]

@@katiekane5247 they really should try though. If they hadn't gotten me back the last words I would have heard would have been "and this is how women die in childbirth". I didn't know why I was dying, I just knew I was dying. It's seriously messed me up mentally since then. I had postpartum depression so badly

[@InfinitelyASMR]

I’m so sorry this happened to you. That’s a horrible experience. Hope your PPD has resolved. You’re amazing to going through it all.

[@stephhagerty6117]

I had a appendicitis while 12 weeks pregnant so they had to do open surgery while I was awake (similar to a c-section). They tied down my legs and arms. They informed me why they were tying my arms down (was on medication and didn’t want me to make a sudden movement that would cause a jerk movement). They also continuously asked me if I was comfortable or okay. Always ask questions.

[@JediLadyMisty]

My mom had to have her appendix removed while she was pregnant with my oldest sister but I don’t know the details of the surgery. All I know is that the ultrasound tech brought someone else into the room to show them that my mom’s appendix was leaking and saying ‘look at that’. At the time they couldn’t tell her what they were seeing until either they consulted with a doctor or had to wait for the doctor to tell her what was happening.

[@HeidiLilley]

I had gall stones and blockage and had surgery at six and half months pregnant. Had to have surgery and while they were stitching me up they told me that my appendix was starting to push through the incision so they removed that as well. I honestly do not remember having my arms tied down, other than the arm that had the IV in it. Gotta say, having major surgery when you are pregnant (12 weeks or 25+weeks) is very frightening. I was not under general anesthesia but did have enough stuff in me that I was not awake to talk or remember the actual surgery.

[@tarazieminek1947]

😮

[@Kristinapedia]

the problem is you can't always ask questions. I had demerol for pain when I first went into the hospital to have my son, then the epidural and then the spinal block for the c-section. I have never taken anything stronger than advil until that point. I was so loopy, hallucinating and out of it I wasn't coherent enough to ask questions. they could have told me they were cutting off my legs and I would have been like, "ok".

[@jenjensi]

It sounds like you had great care 😊 thanks for sharing.

[@Black-Swan-007]

I've never been pregnant and I never will be (childfree by choice) but hearing, "I believe you" hit me in a way I wasn't expecting. Thank you MDJ

[@jenna6149]

I think it is because we are so used to having to fight to be heard and believed.

[@DalynJenkins]

Nice to have more in the child free by choice club 👍

[@Black-Swan-007]

@@DalynJenkins I love meeting like minded people! ^^

[@Black-Swan-007]

@@jenna6149 You're not wrong, unfortunately.

[@tinkeramma]

This is everything. Having providers who see us makes more difference than words can say.

[@hannahkingerlee2676]

It might seem small but just you saying 'I believe you' about the pain in back labour nearly made me cry. I had so much back pain in early labour and the midwives and nurses acted as though I was being super dramatic (I'm UK based so care was mostly done by midwives). I was admitted to labour ward when I was 3cm dilated because my blood pressure was so high and they told me I shouldn't be in that much pain when I'm not even in active labour yet. I was having contractions but it was absolutely zero in comparison to the back pain. I couldn't sleep for 3 days until I was finally induced and then when I got to 4cm I begged for an epidural only for it to do pretty much nothing except mean I couldn't move around. I ended up with an emergency Caesarean as I stopped progressing and the spinal tap they gave me was amazing- I had the best sleep ever that night. The same midwives looked after me after the birth too and were confused why I was handling the pain of the C-section so well and kept telling me not to be a martyr and accept more painkillers- but after the 3 days of back labour- it felt like nothing. That turned into a bit of a rant, but the point is thank you for listening to your patients. It was nice to feel validated after being made to feel like I was being over-dramatic.

[@purpleghost106]

It honestly needs to be a much more standard practice to believe people about our experiences. I'm sorry you went through that :( I loved my midwife team but there were definitely points they could have been more clear. Like when I got an induction because I was progressing slowly my care was transfered entirely to an OB I didn't know, but nobody explained that to me. Also my sympathies about the black labour, I had something not quite that but pains would shoot up my spine to my head and give me a wicked bad tension headache feeling with every contraction. Like sincerely felt like when you accidentally try to stand up and something is above the back of your head, you just want to fall down into a ball every time, and like with you when I finally got the epidural 2 days into labour it didn't affect that. Don't know the word for what that was but it suuuucks.

[@louiseideastore1721]

Omg yes. The pain. I went on to have a standard birth afterwards and the difference.... Just grrrrrrrrrr I was in pain!

[@Anna-B]

I was wondering if you could talk about cyclical breast pain and fibrositic breasts, and things like that. When I first noticed breast pain and bumpiness, I thought I was dying. But then I noticed it was worse around my period and the bumps were pretty symmetrical. I just think it’s important for women to know what’s dangerous, what’s normal, and what’s in between

[@valnsky]

Yes please! The breast pain can be out of this world! I sometimes want to tape my boobs to my body when walking or running lol If you suffer with it, please look into Chasteberry fruit supplement - it made a difference for me.

[@Sonns7900]

Yessss I suffer the worst breast pain. I have PCOS which makes it worse.

[@elmakaric4655]

Check out Violet Daily for your cyclical and fibrocystic breast pain. It works wonders

[@xalanii]

Part of why you're supposed to check your breasts around the same time each cycle and preferably right after menstruation (3 to 5 days after your period starts)

[@sasamafrass]

Yes please!

[@elisharoberts1029]

The horrible communication one killed me. My baby wasn't as emergency at all and yet my anesthesiologist literally had to loudly demand the surgeon and nurses stop their work and start talking before I jumped off the table while I was open. I just wanted to see my baby and know if he was ok.

[@AnnaMitZuckerguss]

After having had a c section myself I can confirm that the communication was terrible. Nobody explained to me, why I got my hands fixed on the table like a pregnant Jesus, nobody told me about contractions afterwards or even what medicine they gave me just before the operation startet (I now assume it was something to make sure I didn't need to poop for two days and I am glad they gave it to me). But because of the very confusing and very unexpected situation and my own fear I wasn't able to speak up. It was a total mess and I went home traumatized. This has to change.

[@littlemissbekah9722]

I'm so sorry the medical team failed you and contributed to your delivery trauma. Just so you know, the medicine they gave you right before was most likely something to neutralize your stomach acid to help make sure you wouldn't throw up during the c section. I'm so sorry the doctors/nurses didn't help you like they should have 💙

[@Sonns7900]

I'm sorry you went through that.

[@xalanii]

I'm definitely a curious patient. I'll do whatever I'm asked really, I just want to know why and it helps me prepare for what's going on. Being in the dark makes me scared and a worse patient

[@jenniedarling3710]

That's terrible what country was this in?

[@Jessamineann]

Someone mentioned to me that they strap your hands down during a c-section and I made a point to tell my midwife that if I wound up needing one to use general anesthesia. That’s a huuuuge trauma trigger for me and I probably would have lost my damn mind.

[@maddiejoy6619]

I had hyperemesis when I was pregnant. The nurses told me they don't usually prescribe Zofran until the second trimester. BUT! I'm a type 1 diabetic and was having dangerously low blood sugars because I was vomiting up any the sugar/carbs I ate. My blood sugar got so low on several occasions that my glucose monitor couldn't read it. Thankfully, the doctor was told about this situation and prescribed me two different nausea meds that helped me limp along until birth. It was crazy how fast the nausea went away once my son was born. The next day, I thought I was about to vomit, but then I realized I was just hungry (a feeling I hadn't felt in months 🤣).

[@margithammer8835]

They gave me zofran in my first trimester. I couldn't take whatever the non prescription drug for it was because of ocular hypertension. I don't even have type one diabetes.

[@maddiejoy6619]

@@margithammer8835 I think it may have just been my clinic's policy. It was weird.

[@Queenofthatank]

Lmao i know that feeling i never heard it put that way but it makes sense now

[@Snowshowslow]

@@maddiejoy6619 Not just your clinic, I have HG as well and my doctors and I were counting down until the second trimester to add Zofran to the mix and stop my hospitalisations for dehydration. I think they were worried about heart defects in infants. Although they did mention part of the issue is there wasn't enough research data available for women who used it this early, which is of course a self-perpetuating problem (and a common one with medications in pregnancy, I think as no one wants to risk anything).

[@roseyfields2729]

As a hairdresser I’m thankful for the way you described post-partum hair loss. I feel like I can adequately pass along that information

[@duckieeeebot833]

Thank you so much for touching on HG. I’m on my third pregnancy, 2nd with hyperemesis, and I was truly shocked by how little empathy many health care professionals have for women who are suffering through such a debilitating diagnosis. Bringing awareness is so incredibly important 💜

[@lovelybrooks8810]

That's what I was thinking 11 years ago I had HG I'm completely traumatized by the whole experience to ever even be pregnant again... So many people don't understand and they think you're being overdramatic... Which really doesn't help what do we feel like we're Barely hanging on to life...

[@karischultz904]

8 - I was tied down no one said anything to me. I couldn't touch my baby. Then I went into a recovery room for about a hour where I was alone with my thoughts, the nurse was on her computer, worst experiences ever. I still feel trauma 18 years later. Thank you mama for saying this is not okay. I hope it helps someone.

[@NadiaSeesIt]

I'm so sorry you went through that, it's unacceptable

[@melikaaziminia9522]

Dear mama Dr. Jones, I’m a disabled woman and in the future, I’m hoping to get pregnant. I’d love it if you didn’t interview with a disabled mom. I feel like disability and pregnancy is not something that we talk about often

[@sarahlizziebethc-k7902]

Hi! Im a disabled mother of 3, pregnant with my 4th! I'm happy to answer any questions! :)

[@loes6839]

Follow hannah witton! She's a disabled sex Educator and had MDJ on her poscat "doing it". Hannah is also currently very pregnant

[@arielgaede3673]

Jessica Kellgren-Fozard is a great resource. She wasn't pregnant herself (her wife was) but she talks about being a mom to a new born while managing her disability

[@uzmaahmed.catmoon]

Visually impaired mum of 4 here

[@Animalgirl115]

I would love this too!

[@imsoboredhahaha]

Are you able to watch “This is Going To Hurt” in NZ? If you can, it seems like a great OBGYN show to react to, especially by episode 6

[@Moth.187]

omg yess I just finished watching it yesterday :(

[@sophieirwin3497]

Yas! If nothing else, please read the book and give your thoughts on it!

[@jennyupabove]

Yes please. I'd be so interested to know MDJs opinion

[@addictedtoyoutube1902]

The book and series are quite different. Would be interesting to hear thoughts on either. Quite specific to working in the NHS though, so might not reflect experiences in the USA/NZ.

[@sophieirwin3497]

@@addictedtoyoutube1902 yes I was surprised how different they are as I have the book and audiobook, then watched the series

[@KrystalPancakes]

My arms were tied down during emergency c section almost 19 years ago. And I thought they did it so I couldn't leave or assult the dr when they cut me open BEFORE my anesthesia was working. They squirted me with the stupid water and I TOLD THEM I could feel it. The lady with the bottle straight up looked at the dr and said No she can't. She's just saying that. So they took her word over mine and it wasn't until they cut me open and my reaction, that they realized, no I CAN feel it all and it is now too late. Talk about trauma. But that is legit why I thought they strapped everyone's arms. In case they didn't numb you enough so you cannot freak out.

[@artsysabs]

Oh god that's awful. Sorry you had the bad experience

[@RedRoseSeptember22]

That's so scary :( I'm sorry you went through that. I hope you sued them for medical malpractice.

[@KrystalPancakes]

@@RedRoseSeptember22 Thank you. I wish I would've. I was 18 and in shock with no one to advocate for me or help me advocate for myself. I just wanted to get me and my baby as far away from that place as I could get!

[@JS-rn7km]

@@KrystalPancakes I'm so sorry you were put through that

[@komninikantartzi6205]

Same, I wish they had tied my arms down. Because I had shivers so intense that my hand was shaking uncontrollably and I was scared I was going to hit the doctor or someone else. Also, my epidural during the c-section wasn't working on one side. I told the doctor that, and she told me that I wasn't feeling pain, just pressure. It was awful, I could actually feel everything on the left side and there was nothing I could do about it

[@frankied.roosevelt6232]

I'd like to add: not come in contact with me and my service dog in public before knowing that you're pregnant. She always tells on the nurses that are pregnant at the infusion center before they even know. She has a 100% success rate in "alerting" to the pregnant people around her. Lol we think it's because she's my dysautonomia medical alert doctor and picking up on the autonomic nervous system dysfunction that comes with pregnancy... like the brain fog, HG, neuroinflammatory, and pre-eclampsia type stuffs.

[@laartje24]

Service dogs can smell out certain hormone levels. That is actually how they do some of their alerts. Seems like yours has a knack for sniffing out hormones related to pregnancy. Edit: Apperantly I only saw half the comment. That is also an interesting take on it, didn't think about that one.

[@ghillies4life]

I had a coworker with a POTS alert dog while I was pregnant and she would constantly alert me. It was crazy.

[@withelisa]

I don't know, that's actually kind of cool!

[@frankied.roosevelt6232]

@@laartje24 I post-edited it. Lol sorry. The whole brain fog thing is a real struggle most days for me. 🤣 she also picks up on still actively breast feeding moms, too. With dysautonomia primarily affecting women, you're likely right on the whole hormone thing. Especially since I have the EDS side of things too. Progesterone can mess with the connective tissues and is often thought to be why gestational diabetes, hair loss, and hyperthyroidism can occur in pregnancy. A lot of us experience a period of "remission" from POTS during the first two trimesters of pregnancy and then have the pre-eclampsia and prolapse issues later on. My goofball of a genius service dog has a foot smelling problem. Usually when i let her go into "dog mode" or people pet her, she smells people's feet before anything else and people always think she's smelling their pets at home. In reality, that's usually how she decides if someone has medical things going on. She'll fixate on the feet of people with certain conditions and then decide if she wants to bump their hand like she does with my high heart, low BP, and even pre-symptomatic sepsis (times 5 for me now..truly my angel ). When I was more unstable, she would sleep on my feet and wake me up when my heart rate would drop below 45bpm. So that's kinda how we figured out why she would fixate on people's feet initially. It was very much a natural alert that I manged to shape into a hand bump. Her main task is picking things up for me. The natural medical alert sense was just an added bonus on top of her primary mobility tasks!.

[@laartje24]

@@frankied.roosevelt6232 Haha I feel you, I instantly blamed my brain fog, since I also have that going on. Very interesting read, it is very different from how my service dog alerts. She smells my breath for cortisol alerts, presumably from the cortisol levels in my saliva. She used to be medical response for anxiety and panic attacks but figured out on her own how to become a medical alert dog on top of that. So fascinating what they can learn.

[@shirleyjeanpilger3482]

I feel so lucky, when I had my babies, in 1970, 1972 and 1977, I was given information pamphlets on everything I asked about. I also toured the hospitals, labor and delivery rooms, and hospital procedures for most possibilities were explained and all questions were answered. With my 2nd, a father to be said, "This is probably a dumb question...." Our tour guide answered his question, then finished, 'There are no dumb questions, except the ones you don't ask." That was the very first time I had ever heard that and I thought she was brilliant.

[@loskillo]

And regarding "pregnancy brain", and "breastfeeding brain" which is a concept of sorts here in Sweden - how do researchers factor out poor sleep quality and/or lack of sleep? As far as I know, lack of proper sleep is well researched and has strong evidence regarding a temporary degrade of executive function, awareness and IQ. I assume there is strong evidence that late-stage pregnancy is detrimental to sleep quality - not to mention having a newborn or two...

[@justabookworm1382]

I wonder the same thing! I'm a college student, and I've never been pregnant- ever, but I feel like I experience this "pregnancy brain" thing once in a while when I'm really busy with attending college, doing college homework, the job, and trying to finish other adult responsibilities. I notice that on these few occasions where I experienced "pregnancy brain", I had insufficient sleep ongoing for maybe three days in a row or more, and I do believe that sleep along with stress plays a very strong role in your cognitive function. Edit: for the pregnant women reading this and having a great sleep schedule, I didn't mean to downplay your experiences at all. I was just wondering because I've experienced that kind of thing without even being pregnant, and I just would love to know for sure if it's the sleep thing. Also, although you have experienced it, it's anecdotal evidence, which may be helpful to some mothers, but for studies which apply to the general population of pregnant women, they usually need a large sample. And within that large sample, I wonder if the researchers did the study with the influence of poor sleep in their minds or not. Because if they didn't think about that part at all, the study's results may not be so reliable.

[@saschamayer4050]

Interesting! I'd like to know that, too.

[@celestekeeler3703]

Just giving my own experience here, but during my first trimester I really didn't have sleep problems. I do now that I am entering my 3rd trimester, but the pregnancy brain for me was surprisingly far worse during the first trimester when my sleep was fine. I couldn't believe how I was constantly forgetting things. I thought I was going crazy because it was so bad. And at least from just the small amount of women I talked to about it at the time agreed that they also felt pregnancy brain in the first trimester. So personally I feel like it's more than just a lack of sleep thing.

[@MamaDoctorJones]

Absolutely

[@rockleefangal]

@@celestekeeler3703 I can’t speak to later on since I’m only just approaching the end of my first trimester with my first but I’m sure this has to be right. I’m sleeping super well (biometric ring confirmed) and I have been routinely doing things like taking the wrong turn on my normal commute or putting cereal in the fridge since week 6. 😂

[@itoshiibaka8267]

I just want to share a more positive unplanned c-section story so people who are pregnant right now aren't as alarmed. I live in Canada. I chose to have a midwife because I wanted consistency of care from the same person throughout the pregnancy, to be informed about all of my options, to create a birth plan, and to have an informed and capable advocate for me during the process. I had a midwife and mostly normal pregnancy until labour. My labour was irregular and unproductive for a few days. I was only a few centimetres dilated, so my midwife told me she would burst my water to get my labour going. We laboured for a while, but nothing was improving. My midwife said I needed to be induced, so I took the epidural, but then my son's heartrate kept dropping with each contraction. My midwife told me that the cord might be wrapped around my baby's neck and that we could continue pushing for a bit, but we would probably have to go to c-section. I could wait or go ahead. I thought for a moment and decided that a perfectly healthy baby would be coming out and the c-section was the best way to do that. All of a sudden I found out it would happen in 15 minutes! That spooked me because I hadn't realized how urgent the situation was. My husband was scared to lose us both, but tried to hide it. At that point my care was transferred to the surgeon. I had been explained that that would happen in riskier circumstances when I first chose to have a midwife. I insisted I needed my husband with me in the operating room even at the beginning and that he wouldn't get in the way. They permitted it. I didn't have my hands strapped. I couldn't breathe well, though, because of the epidural freezing all the way up to my chest. I don't have a clue what they did behind the curtain after removing my baby, but he was beside my head right after they checked him. Maybe my husband knows whether they pressed anything out or just manually removed the placenta. Apparently my son peed all over the surgeon! Haha. Baby wasn't with me for a little while that felt too long, to be weighed and other stuff. But then we were both in our room together. I had to stay two nights because they wanted to make sure my son didn't also have a low platelet count. I was provided with a surgery report. The only time I felt my boundaries weren't respected was when my midwife was teaching breastfeeding techniques, she actually grabbed my breast and maneuvered it into my son's mouth. I will probably express upfront that I don't want that if there's a next time. The recovery was fairly smooth, although I had a large diastasis (gap) in my abdomen. It has mostly healed with gentle, appropriate exercises (I think the KZbin channel is called Postpartum TV?). I still need to get around to proper pelvic floor physio and my son is now 3. Oops. Aftercare with a midwife is super amazing, though. The one I had came to my house for the first couple of weeks for well-baby visits. It was so great. Anyway, I just wanted people to know that there are smooth stories where everything goes the way it should, even in a somewhat emergency situation. Wishing everyone the best and wishing for healing for those who experienced traumatic births.

[@sngray11]

Thank you for sharing your more positive emergency C-section story with all of us. 💗

[@nicky740]

I had an emergency cesarean and it was a positive experience overall and my recovery was amazing. I understand that is not the norm but, I agree, sharing these stories are really important. I think some of the circumstances of birth and afterwards is compounded by people not knowing or preparing that so many things might not happen the way they plan or think. I went in fully preparing myself that I was more likely to need a cesarean than the average person due to some risks so when it turned into an emergency, my brain was able to shift easily. I also had a horrendous pregnancy so my perspective on things is different- plus I have chronic pain and chronic medical issues so my cesarean was uncomfortable but I was going out and doing normal things after 4/5 days, no meds. Not knocking anyone who needs them- most do- but my recovery was amazing and that’s the case for some people and it’s not talked about. I also have heard people saying that the initial pain of a cesarean was more severe than their vaginal birth but they preferred the cesarean recovery because it ended much sooner than the vaginal recovery which took a long time to recover or they had permanent damage/issues from a vaginal birth.

[@hopefullyhelping6664]

I was born via emergency c-section and my mother seemed to have a good experience, from what she has told me. My mother went in for a routine check-up late in her pregnancy, and the medical worker checked her blood pressure when she arrived. It was VERY high-my mother had undiagnosed preeclampsia which had progressed rapidly. They told her that they would need to do an emergency c-section THAT DAY for her and me to be OK. She quickly called my father, who was working at home, and then in 45 minutes or so they started operating. She was awake for the c-section, and asked my father to look at the surgery and tell her what it looked like, out of curiosity. She said he visibly paled, LOL. The doctors told my mother what was happening as they went, and then I was born. They said I was healthy, and then they put me on her chest for skin-to-skin. I was smaller and slightly premature, but the doctors were good to catch the emergency before it progressed. My mother even TOOK THE PUBLIC BUS to the hospital. If the preeclampsia had progressed to eclampsia she might have had seizures on the bus with a bunch of horrified strangers.

[@beep_boop_bop3646]

I love when you further explain and debunk myths! I knew to expect bleeding for the obvious reason: just had a baby, but I went a couple of hours feeling little gushes of blood coming out with every little cough, sneeze, (light) laugh, etc. It started to feel like I wet my bed so I called in my nurse... I was hemorrhaging and I had no idea. Turns out, I hemorrhaged on the operating table during my delivery too (I had no idea about that either because I was put under). I wish my nurses had told me once I got to my postpartum room to call them asap if I felt little gushes of blood coming out because I was at such a high risk of needing a blood transfusion at that point. I ended up being surrounded by nurses and I think a couple of them were doing a fundal massage at the same time. I will never forget seeing my Mom's face when the nurse calmly announced that I was hemorrhaging. Medical professionals in this field are absolutely incredible individuals, and saved my life multiple times throughout my experience ❤️

[@Lina_unchained]

I wish someone had told me that Preeclampsia/eclampsia can occur after delivery and had explained to me WHY they ask if you've had headaches etc. I got preeclampsia/eclampsia after I went home and almost died because I wasn't aware that my headache was something to be super worried about initially as it started as a relatively normal feeling headache before it built into something that I could recognize as deeply dangerous. Initially, I told them I had a headache and they sent me home because my blood pressure was only on the high end of normal, but because I usually run low, this was a much bigger deal than it would have been for someone else. It is imperative that Drs are more clear as to why they are asking you certain questions and tell you what is something to be on the look out for as well as that they communicate more effectively with one another about the whole patient and their history not just what is happening right in the moment.

[@stephaniehowe0973]

Its a headache that nothing helps. Like no other 💙

[@Lina_unchained]

@@stephaniehowe0973 I quite literally couldn't stand. My friend Alan had to come essentially breakdown the hotel room door and extract me in order to get me back to the hospital.

[@Jessamineann]

I do, too. And just an fyi, (and sorry to be the one to tell you) cuz you probably don’t know and no one will tell you, but pregnancy related hypertension disorders increase your risk for heart disease and stroke when you’re older, and you’re more likely get high blood pressure younger/sooner than most women. I recently found that out after being diagnosed as “pre-hypertensive”. I’m thirty-seven.

[@Lina_unchained]

@@Jessamineann Thank you for telling me! I will ask my doctor's about this and I will be sure to consistently keep an eye on my pressure. thank you again!

[@Jessamineann]

@@Lina_unchained you’re welcome!

[@kerrieboucher1332]

I am about 4.5 months postpartum and my hair loss has been going wild the last few weeks. Thank you for explaining why it's happening! I love watching your videos!

[@sarat.1744]

Same. Will be 4 months postpartum tomorrow and I'm so done with this hairloss..when will it stop?! T_T

[@kerrieboucher1332]

@@sarat.1744 I've read it can take up to a year postpartum to resolve. I hope gor both of us it doesn't take that long!

[@sarat.1744]

@@kerrieboucher1332 yeah nah, I'd be bald by then for sure... *sighs*

[@cairrean2412]

Massaging your scalp in the shower can help stimulate hair growth! Like the way the person in the salon will massage your scalp if you get a wash and cut. It's not a miracle cure or anything ofc, but it can help.

[@stephaniehowe0973]

Keep on top of your thyroid too

[@Rachelief]

As a first-time pregnant lady, I’m excited for this video! I’m 25 weeks and 6 days today! Never too late to learn more lol. 🥰

[@RedRoseSeptember22]

Congratulations and I hope all goes well when the time comes ♥

[@Lina_unchained]

Congratulations and remember you are worth advocating for! If something is happening that is making you uncomfortable, you have every right to speak up and ask questions. I hope everything goes well and that you have a great experience! You are worth advocating for ALWAYS! ❤️❤️❤️ much love and support from a 3 time mama over here!

[@vlmellody51]

My remaining wisdom teeth started to come in very painfully after I delivered my son, causing the need for oral surgery 3 weeks after he was born. My postpartum depression turned into psychosis at about the same time. While my pregnancy was relatively mild; my mind and body postpartum completely unraveled, leaving me to deal with the wreckage.

[@westzed23]

@@vlmellody51 so sorry that you went through all that. Hope you and baby are doing well now. 🥰

[@vlmellody51]

@@westzed23 thank you for your compassion. I think I should have made clear that all happened 38 years ago. The psychosis abated over the course of 3 years, along with most of those physical consequences I experienced during my pregnancy and postpartum period. It didn't help that my now ex husband was unsupportive and abusive, but he's dead now, so I no longer have to deal with his crap. My son is tall and healthy and his bipolar disorder has been in remission for more than 20 years now.

[@meganordway3369]

When I was in labor and my baby was having decels I directly asked the doctor what the heart rate was and the doctors wouldn't tell me (and I couldn't see the monitor myself) and in a snarky voice told me it "wasn't important how low it was getting..." Then when my baby was born I couldn't see him to assess his apgar score and again when I asked no one would tell me. Being dismissed and not told important information about my baby's wellbeing made me so anxious.

[@amymathis4910]

Thank you so much for the information about "back labor." I feel validated! During my 1st pregnancy, at 17 years old, I was given the option to use a TENS unit during labor. I realized that all my period pain was in my back and thought that would be a wise decision. I was correct because all of my labor pain was in my back, until my daughter crowned. Fast forward about 3 years and I was in a child development class in college. I remember missing the question about back labor because my professor said it was the transition stage when the baby was turning. When I told her that my entire labor must have been transitioning, she didn't believe me (and I still missed the question! 😂). It wasn't until labor with my second child that I experienced contractions in the front - and they were terrible! I assumed it was because I was induced that time, and also because I was used to back pain. The few times I have had menstrual cramps have been miserable and I feel for anyone who has them all the time. I'll take back pain any day. Another issue I had at 17 was when I felt my baby's movements at 12 weeks. I was told it was just gas, but that same sensation was my baby moving throughout my pregnancy, so I guess she's my 28-year-old stinker! I actually felt my babies moving at 12 weeks in each of my 3 pregnancies, so maybe they're all stinkers. I definitely received better care when I had babies at 25 and 29, with much less judgement and dismissal (and different physicians, too).

[@chocolatereigns]

My daughter is about to turn 1 but last year when we realized there was a good chance I would need a C-section (due to a rare genetic condition she has), I had a full-on panic attack about the idea of my arms being tied down to the table. C-section I could handle the idea of... Arms being restricted like that, nope. I get stressed out just thinking about it. I'm so glad you're telling people to advocate for themselves and ask to have their arms free.

[@kristin4160]

I don't know if my pregnancy is directly affecting my brain, but the combination of insomnia, anxiety, reduced exercise, and just general feeling unwell seems to have taken a toll.

[@Jen1N.]

Thank you for the explanation about hair loss. All the hair that I lost on my hairline is now growing back at the same time and it looks like the time I tried to cut bangs for myself when I was 5. It is driving me crazy!

[@tynebaker]

Wow! Post partum hair loss is super interesting biologically, thanks for sharing the explanation.

[@iylannaslife]

I’d love it if you could talk about cerclages. I had one due to the tech noticing my cervix opening/coning at my 20 week Ultrasound. I had no idea what it was and the only person who knew what it was previously was my mom due to horses and vet checks. It’s super scary and I guess quite common so I think it would be a great topic. Btw, me and my son made it to 33 weeks and he’s happy and healthy now at 6 months!

[@baileywright1656]

I agree! I just had one last week at 20 weeks because I have an extremely dynamic cervix (4cm to 2.7 cm to under 1 cm while they were watching on the ultrasound).

[@cynthiaevery2801]

30 years ago I had one with my twins, due to an incompetent cervix and preterm labor at 20 weeks. I hope there is a new term!

[@eileennwachukwu7620]

Omg I totally agree! I had one too.

[@LaTashaGreenlee]

Agreed. I had two cerclages. One in 2020 and another in 2021.

[@concara86]

I had no idea about them either until my second pregnancy. My first baby came at 29 weeks and my doctor just said it happens and they have no idea. My second baby I was in for the 20 week anatomy ultrasound and the tech got up and left in the middle of the session. Came back with my doctor, showed him something, lots of nodding and hushed talking. Then they told me I had started to dilate. Gave me the option of an emergency cerclage or going home and hoping for the best. I chose the cerclage, not really knowing what it was but thinking it sounded better than hoping for the best. Water broke on the OR table right as the dr came in to do the cerclage and I lost that baby. Third and fourth pregnancy they put one in at 16 weeks and started me on progesterone. Was able to carry both of those babies to 38 weeks. My dr showed me the stitch after he took it out with my last pregnancy and it was way different than how I thought it would look. No one else I know and have spoken with have even heard of it.

[@catatemyname7801]

"There is always time to tell you what's happening" - I wish they would always do that. When I was just a few hours into labor, my water had broken in the very beginning and the process didn't progress as quickly as they would have liked, so I was induced additionally (is that how you would call it? not a native speaker. they gave me meds to speed up the process basically). Shortly after that they did a routine CTG, and suddenly the device goes crazy with some loud alarm, a doctor and a nurse rush in, the doc plugs some IV into me, while the nurse frantically moves the thing around that was strapped to my belly, as if searching for signs of life and finding none (that's what my panicking brain instantly went to). I keep yelling "what's happening, is the baby okay? talk to me!!!" and they just say "just breathe" and keep doing their thing. by the time the alarm stopped I was an anxious, panicking mess. They gave me some unenthusiastic explanation along the lines of "yeah, some babies don't like it when you're induced and their heart rate goes wild, so we had to give you some counter meds to stop the process again". when I pointed out, barely holding in tears, how terrifying it was to see them being all frantic around me and not saying anything, the nurse just said, off-hand, "that wasn't frantic, you haven't seen frantic", and left. That was a fun experience. Not going to the same hospital if I'm having a second baby.

[@purpleghost106]

I'm very sorry you went through that :( Communication is tantamount, they really should have been at least saying what the medication was for. Had the same thing with my water breaking and not going into proper labour for hours, it is called being induced yes. Or you could phrase it "I had an induction" but yeah you're using the right word!

[@catatemyname7801]

@@laurabaker7258 I'm so sorry to hear that, and I hope you and your daughter were okay afterwards. honestly, hearing the stories about being strapped to the table is absolutely horrifying. I'm pretty sure if it had happened to me I would've totally lost it. Not being in control of your own body while strangers are doing something to you is nightmare stuff. After my own experience, which was nowhere near as terrifying as yours, I demanded that I wanted my boyfriend there. The covid rules were, he was allowed to join me when it was almost time, and it would be hours still. but seeing my mental state they allowed him to come right away. He was my rock through the whole day, and I knew he could advocate for me when I wouldn't be able to.

[@staceyhunt6769]

I had Hyperemesis with all 3 of mine. 1st I thought it was normal. 2nd, I went from 68kg to 43kg and the Dr's gave me IV fluids then were like "Eh. You'll be fine. 🤷‍♀️" so until I was 26 weeks pregnant I was peeing once or twice every 24hrs, continued to drop weight slowly and could hardly function whilst caring for a 1yr old. My blood-pressure was constantly so low if anyone noticed they'll rush me to A&E (And reffer me to the maternity unit who'd just send me back home, nothing done) because they thought I'd drop dead any moment. But hey, nothing to worry about. How I continued to nurse my oldest until I was 23 weeks in, I have no idea. With my 3rd, it was the pandemic and even if someone cared, nobody would do anything anyway. At this point I was a single mother with a 1 and 2 year old, and pushed T.F. through with regular passing out and lived with a bucket in hand for so much of the pregnancy the kids got really upset when I no-longer needed it because it wasn't normal. But despite that, it still gets an eye-roll and "Just morning sickness" responses. All 3 of my children struggle to gain weight or hold weight. Are prone to extreme responses to small illnesses (Colds are 39.8°c fevers, same with routine vaccines for examples) and my youngest 2 have bad lung health. Not sure if this is because of poor management of my Hyperemesis or something else, but I'll never be able to stop questioning if the medical teams ignoring it cost my children.

[@michelle32855]

I can attest to the "epidural not always working" thing...all it did for me was putt my butt to sleep...wasn't having a lot of pain back there, haha. I also think they pinged a nerve in my knee, since I had a horrid stabbing pain there and the knee bothered me for a couple years afterward. When I asked the doc about it, he said "yeah, my knee hurts sometimes too" and walked away. Lovely. This was the same guy who came in with several students in tow, never bothered to introduce himself, examined me, did something, and left. I had to ask the nurse if he'd broken my water.

[@zlcoad1]

Number 7 - A friend of mine had this with her first. She was so convinced that she wasn’t in labour because her water hadn’t broken that she ended up going to hospital 30 mins before her son was born.

[@laurao3274]

In both of my births, the medical staff broke the waters. I never got that dramatic gush.

[@ktybo7815]

Nobody told me about the 3rd stage after my C-section with twins. I had contractions for two days after and they explained it is was because I had just given birth to a 7 pound 6oz and a 5 pound 14 ounce set of twins. I went 38.5 weeks with my twins and actually had walked into the hospital 7.5 cm dilated and has no idea I was in “hard labor”. My doctor didn’t do VBAC so I had an emergency C-section. My uterus was so big that I developed an infection that they missed and ended up on major antibiotics. The doctor thought I was being a “wimp” and then apologized once they realized I had a VERY bad infection. But, my twins were worth every bit of pain. The pain level was terrible 😢

[@RedRoseSeptember22]

I honestly *hate* how doctors treat women, especially *pregnant* women.

[@ktybo7815]

@@RedRoseSeptember22 I noticed that the female Nurses were less sympathetic to the INSANE pain I was in. I was screaming so loud telling them that something was terribly wrong and one told me I was being “dramatic” and “terrifying” my babies. Meanwhile, I was clotting the size of plums and sobbing uncontrollably begging to be knocked out…even for 10 minutes. My mom was crying, my ex-husband FINALLY called my OBGYN on the phone and said “something is really wrong with Kim, I think she is dying”. My obgyn came in and immediately saw the issue, gave me some REALLY helpful pain medication and started IV antibiotics and blood pressure medication (the pain had brought my BP to STROKE level). I am so thankful for my OBGYN. He saved my life twice.

[@laurao3274]

@@ktybo7815 That was extremely negligent of them not to be checking you regularly. I gave birth a week ago, and they were checking my blood pressure every 2 minutes straight after the birth, then every 15 minutes, then every hour for like the first 12 hours. Then every 2 hours until discharge. They also checked my pads periodically to make sure I wasn't hemorrhaging or having large clots.

[@ktybo7815]

@@laurao3274 it was pretty traumatic at the time but I got two beautiful babies and no lasting health issues. I did however file and report with the hospital, but unless I was willing to get legal representation (I was in a terrible marriage with 3 kids 18 months and under and a full time job I went back to 3 weeks after the birth of my twins), my complaint went nowhere. I am just happy that my OBGYN had given me his personal phone number. He is no longer my doctor but he has become a very good friend that helped me through my divorce (we both agreed it would be weird with him continuing my care). The doctor who treated me like crap has since retired. I just want women to know that if they feel something is not right, go with your gut!

[@fshs6187]

I LOVE my OB. I am SO PICKY about who I pick. I moved states, and loved my OBGYN before I moved. I took a LONG TIME to find a new one I LOVED when I moved states. Once I decided on her, I had all my paperwork and records and everything sent over to her. She looked at it and said “you had dr. Xyz? I know him! He was my attending when I was a resident. I love him! He taught me everything I know!” Then joked about how she got so good at her job she was stealing his patients lol. I guess I like what I like and I know what I like! But seriously! My son was pretty big- 10lbs. We knew he was big and I really didn’t want a c section. The other 2 doctors in the office (who I had to meet with at least once per their policy in case they ended up delivering the baby) said they would just give me a c section because of his size if they were the doctor on call. When I made it to 39 weeks she agreed to induce me due to his size because she said there was no reason I couldn’t try to deliver him vaginally, and if he didn’t fit then she would do the c section. Guess who didn’t have a c section?! 🙋🏻‍♀️🙋🏻‍♀️ My daughter was 8lbs and as soon as I was pregnant with her my OB said “After a 10lb baby you have a proven pelvis now, so unless there’s danger to you or the baby a c section is off the table. You can push it out.” I want to add there’s absolutely nothing wrong with having a c section or needing a c section if that’s what is safest for you and the baby and any other reason agreed upon by you and your doctor. I just didn’t want to have one for what I believed was no reason, they didn’t KNOW he wouldn’t fit, it was MIGHT not fit. And they were wrong and my wonderful OB let me choose because there was no risk for me to try!

[@KatySueWho]

I wasn’t told what it was called, but with my 1st pregnancy, I was constantly vomiting. Constantly. My obgyn stepped up the medical intervention repeatedly, but she never approved for me to go on my short term disability (maternity leave)! I was taken by ambulance from work to go get hydrated but I was unconscious for the ride. They had to put 3 bags of saline in me before my blood pressure normalized. So I was put on a midline, so I could take in the saline, along with iv vitamins and iv zofran, on my own, at home. Even then, she didn’t approve starting my maternity leave. The midline caused burning in my vein, so it had to be upgraded to a pic line. My son is 19 now and I still have the scars on the inside of my elbow where they had to stitch it in place to my arm. I was literally vomiting at least once, usually twice or more, at work every day. I was a bank teller. The bathroom was upstairs. My immediate supervisor told me to stop running up to the bathroom all the time and just use my garbage can in my teller window. I didn’t do that. But there was more than once that it didn’t matter how fast I ran, I didn’t quite make it for the first part. Not on purpose or anything like that. I was the one cleaning it up, after all. I was vomiting with every contraction once I started pushing him out, too. And I pushed for 90 minutes. But once he was out, we started saving so much money on food!! Cause I was starving! So I’d eat a meal and then just puke it all up, then I’d have to try to eat a meal again. And sometimes it would stay down the 2nd time, but sometimes it would take a 3rd try. And I couldn’t just go hungry and give up! I had a baby to feed! It just sucked watching all of that food going to waste. And all the misery, and almost dying, that sucked too. But I got a really good prize at the end! Edit: my 2nd pregnancy was significantly easier, I got a job at a place that was significantly more supportive of me while pregnant and lactating (they hired me at 35 weeks!), and I was with a significantly better obgyn. I got a new obgyn because my insurance changed with my 3rd pregnancy. He was phenomenal!! Always educating me on my options and letting me make the decisions! And let me go on maternity leave at 30 weeks because my belly felt particularly heavy!!! He treated my concerns that I brought to him seriously and with respect! Blew my freaking mind. what I’m saying is DON’T SETTLE. THIS IS OUT THERE. IT’S NOT TOO LATE TO CHANGE DOCTORS UNTIL THEY’RE WHEELING UP TO THE STIRRUPS. DO WHATS BEST FOR YOU. AND IF IT DOESN’T FEEL RIGHT TO YOU, MAKE A CHANGE. My first obgyn was obnoxious and unhelpful and judgmental, but I’d never had a baby before! I had no idea what to expect. Well, when she walked into my labor and delivery room and said “So, Ashley, how are we doing?” that’s when I decided I would have as little to do with her as I easily could.

[@beetee4865]

I read that Buzzfeed article, so thanks for breaking that down! The hair one is very fascinating. My mom has 4 kids, and her water broke as the start of her labor only with my oldest brother (her 1st). Everyone else her water either broke on its own during delivery or in my case (I'm the 4th), they broke her water sometime during active labor.

[@starlastar2932]

Thank you for the explanation on back labor! When I was pregnant they kept telling me contractions will feel like cramps. But I had never had traditional cramps my whole life. I was so worried I wouldn't know when I was going into labor because of this. But just recently, 3 years after having my son, I had intense back pain on the first day of my cycle. I finally put two and two together! So hearing you talk about this helps so much! Thank you!

[@kikow3792]

I want to share my positive C-section story. Thing is, my daughter was upside down for almost all of my pregnancy. Her head was stuck under my ribs. Ouchie. Anyways, the docs checked during my third trimester. They saw I have Fibromyalgia, am very short sighted, had the placenta at the front of my uterus, and she was head up. So they were like "we're going to do a C-section". I was like "is that necessary?" and they said "yes". I trusted them. We made an appointment 3 days before the due date, first operation in the morning. I had time to plan for it. Everything was ready. They had to knock me out completely, because of the Fibromyalgia and me being basically immune to pain killers, except opioids (I learned that when I was 27! So 5 years later!). My husband kissed me good night. When I woke up, he had our daughter in our arms. I needed to drink. He asked be wether I want to hold her, but my movement was clumsy. I asked him to keep her safe for a little longer, and then went back to sleep. It was alright for me to leave her with the other adult who would protect her with his life. My daughter and I are very close to each other. She knows her birth story. The umbilical cord was around her neck for example! We learned that afterwards. Having a C-section was the right decision for us back then. I am now pregnant again. I am thinking about asking for another, as I had an easy recovery, and overall good memories of it. Might try natural. We will see. If it's another: I wouldn't mind.

[@rloaksmason]

My youngest was delivered by c-section 12 hours after my water broke. There was so much mecomium that the nurse thought I had pooped myself. They wanted to do a third pitocin trial, but I demanded a c-section. They tied me to the table in a T-pose (I had been given an epidural) and got to work. My daughter was in the upper part of my uterus (which was weird, because she was head-down against my cervix when I was admitted). When they finally got her out, she wasn't breathing, and the NICU team had to resuscitate her. After she was revived, my husband got to hold her. He had one of the nurses take a picture with his phone. The joy I feel when I look at that picture goes away when I see myself tied down to the table and remember how dry my mouth was because I wasn't even allowed to wet my lips for hours. The whole process was a nightmare, and it's one of the reasons I'm in therapy. My little one is okay now, but her beginning wasn't the one I would have liked for her to have.

[@rloaksmason]

She and I also spent a week in the hospital because my blood pressure and pain were out of control, and they wanted to make sure my daughter's blood sugars were normal because I had both gestational diabetes and preeclampsia.

[@DaniS398]

After working in L&D and the OR, and watching channels like this that talk about women's bodies and advocating for ones self, I, a naturally shy/quiet person, am very involved in all my medical care and I think that is why I am typically satisfied with my medical care.

[@nataliejune84]

My grandmother was so sick when she was pregnant with my mother she weighed less when she gave birth than when she got pregnant. My mother was the middle child and the only girl. My grandmother had easy pregnancies with my uncles her first and third (last) child

[@candyrachor4737]

I had a planned C-section (breech). I was surprised and annoyed that at this Army hospital my arms were strapped down too. I guess I get it. If for some reason I felt pain I couldn't move and mess things up even more but I did have a problem. My face started to itch. It started around my nose and progressively got worse. I asked someone to rub and scratch it because it was really getting to me. He took a gauze and gently rubbed around my nose. But I needed some finger nails to scratch it. By the time I got into the recovery room I was clawing at my skin with my now free hands. I asked the nurse what is happening, why is my face itching so much. She said I was having a reaction to the pain medicine. She said I can give you something to take away the itching but it will make the pain worse. I had to choose which one would be worse. My face was so red from me scratching. But I chose the itching over the pain. It finally subsided but I was annoyed by that process.

[@SavaFiend]

I have four children, three of which were C-sections. With my fourth and last C-section, the itching afterward was so bad! I was scratching my face and arms raw they had to give me continuous Benadryl in my IV to get it somewhat under control and it still didn't go away for a whole day so I can completely relate!

[@jazmincastro387]

I never hear people talk about Hyperemisis. Thank you! I suffered severely both my pregnancies. I wanted more kids. I always said I would have more kids than what I have. Hyperemisis robbed me of that. Hyperemisis robbed me of so much during my second pregnancy. I didn’t get maternity pictures or get to do much with my daughter because of how ill I was. More people should be aware that it’s debilitating and awful and we aren’t “making it up” it isn’t “all in your head”

[@achurchc]

Thank you for talking about the postpartum hair loss! I just went through this and I am so glad to know why.

[@taylorclay2122]

I feel very fortunate to have had a medical team that told me exactly what was happening during my c-section,. It was so comforting to know that what I was feeling was a normal part of the procedure. There were a few moments where I was uncomfortable but as soon as I said something those needs were immediately addressed, I have heard so many stories where my story isn't the norm and to me this is unaccetable!

[@jessicasnider5541]

When I got my epidural I had absolutely no pain. It was to the point that my left leg was so numb I couldn't feel and move it at all. Thank God that the epidural worked too well, my baby got her shoulder stuck in my hip and it caused me to be pushing for 3hrs. I had to have one doctor to go in and turn her, one doctor pushing on my hip, then I needed an episiotomy and then forceps were used to get her out (I also lost a lot of blood). Again, I felt absolutely NO PAIN, not even the ring of fire... so it was quite a blessing.

[@HomemakerSuzy]

I agree that communication needs to be better. This is my first pregnancy (long story short, late diagnosis of PCOS, begged to have my pdg checked because I seemed to be ovulating, wouldn't do it, and basically just told to lose weight) and I was told I HAD to deliver by 39 weeks. I asked if we could wait for it to start naturally if everything looked ok. Nope. But no explanation as to WHY. I feel like I am constantly looking up research to advocate for myself, which many women don't have the luxury of doing. I have a really good mfm and switched my OB/GYN as soon as I found out I was pregnant because I just didn't trust the one I had any longer. We need to do more for women, so thank you for putting out this content.

[@amandaengelman5168]

Post partum hair loss happens in animals too. After her pups were weaned, my dog's coat thinned way out. She's a thick coated breed and looked ridiculous for a couple months until it grew back.

[@laurengardella9524]

I don't have human children for a lot of reasons so yes, this isn't about pregnancy, but also I've never experienced a love like I did with my baby boy. What I wish I had known when I brought my little baby kitty home...is how much I would absolutely love him...and how devastating it would be to lose him at 4 years old. You know I keep telling myself like a mantra and hearing your voice in my head saying "we do the best we can with the information we have". The absolute love of my life, my joy, my child, the being I loved more than anything in this entire world, my baby boy kitty Yoruichi...passed away suddenly with no seemingly outward signs of illness until that night. He was only four. I took him everywhere with me. He was the first face I saw every morning and the last face I saw every night. I'm devastated and feel like it's my fault. I keep telling myself "you did the best you could with the information you had". It's so hard and I don't think I'll ever recover from this. I love all my furry children. To include his little 8 month old half siblings that were an accident/freak incident because his bio mom was so sick and I took her from my ex best friend and pressed charges on her for the neglect. She didn't go into heat for almost 4 years. Well then surprise. I love Yoruichi's siblings, his cat mom, my dog, my rabbits...but he was special. He was different. He was my soul bond. It's been hard, but I'm glad you always say that Mama Dr Jones. I've been repeating it to myself daily for 3.5 months now.

[@ivanahettnerova3533]

Pregnancy brain is even more fun when you have ADHD i spent so much time during both pregnancies standing in the middle of the room with full glass of water in my hand heavily thinking what was I doing :) Im bad normaly, but when I was pregnant it got to the level that my husband had to go to my work every lunch break and take me for a lunch beause otherwise i could forgot to go back to work. I swear I am pretty normal and inteligent human being when my brain decide to cooperate 😅

[@cherishinman9896]

Thanks so much for this video! It's nice to see someone in the medical community also say "I don't know why, but I believe you." With my first pregnancy, I had THE WORST charlie horse-esque pains between every contraction. As soon as one ended, the muscles in the front of my thighs cramped up so painfully that my legs shook, and the spasms lasted as long as the preceding contractions. By the time I was nearing pushing, I was seamlessly alternating between contractions and leg spasms without any break. My OB theorized that my son's position led to him compressing nerves during contractions and the release of the pressure set off spasms, but even she was perplexed. Still, after a history of ectopic pregnancy everyone but she refused to believe me about, it was reassuring to hear her say "I don't have to know why to believe your experience and have empathy." I didn't have nearly as bag leg cramps with my secondborn--the sheer agony of pitocin-induced contractions outpaced them in my memory--but ever since my firstborn's birth, I get leg cramps when my period cramps are bad.

[@davidwilkinson2234]

Here's one I experienced recently as the father of a newborn. If the doctors and nurses know that you have had a child before they will assume that you know exactly what is happening and what you're supposed to be doing at all times, and be taken aback when you ask questions/don't know what they're talking about. My wife and I just had our 2nd daughter but we didn't really know what we were doing or what was going on because: our 1st daughter was born almost 7 years earlier so it had been a long time, Our 2nd was an unplanned surprise pregnancy, we thought we were done having kids so we didn't really try to retain the info from our 1st time. And, Our 1st had health issues, went straight into the NICU, and needed open-heart surgery at about 2 weeks old so we didn't do any of the 'normal' parenting stuff that happens in the 1st month of life since our kiddo was in hospitals being cared for by nurses that entire time. (She's perfectly healthy now) So when our 2nd one was super healthy and just came with us straight from the operating/delivery room to our recovery room we were essentially 1st timers because we either had never done most of the stuff or didn't remember it based on how long it had been and the fact that we planned on never doing it again, but all the nurses would ask if we had kids and when we told them we had 1 they would stop explaining how/why/what was happening. They would just be like "ok now it's time to do X" and expect us to automatically know exactly what that meant and what we were supposed to do. Also we some of them seemed to be get annoyed with us when we would ask what they probably viewed as dumb questions about our baby because we just had never dealt with an hours/days old baby (talking about the basic 'is this normal? ' or 'should that look like that' or 'is she eating/spitting up/peeing and pooping/sleeping/crying etc... too much/not enough') In fairness, once we explained our situation to them they would start explaining things more and be more patient with us but we ended up having to have that conversation with every nurse at least once.

[@deathofanartist5237]

My "I wish I knew about this" is that stitches on tears toward my clit can mix up the nerve endings, so that using the bathroom is difficult without stimulation. The first year was awful having to retrain my brain, and I still have to be careful when being intimate.

[@DragonFae16]

I'm not pregnant, have never been and never plan to be, but I still love watching MDJ's vids about these sorts of things because they're always so interesting. On the topic of epidurals, for one of my mother's epidurals, it was injected too high in her spine and it turned off her automatic breathing reflex so one of the nurses had to keep telling her every few seconds to breathe.

[@erisavatar]

I'd love to see you do a whole episode on hyperemesis, maybe highlight the amazing work of the HER Foundation. I'm part of several online support groups for this condition as I am currently suffering through it for the 2nd time, and poor or inadequate treatment seems to unfortunately be a huge theme. I'm getting much better care this time around with IV fluids 3x a week and a robust regimen of meds, but most people in the support groups are not so fortunate. Even with better care, the constant nausea, hypersalivation, dysgeusia, and vomiting are beyond emotionally draining.

[@k.elh.8097]

My son (my second pregnancy) was born 12 days "late", but then he was in such a hurry to come out, that my water wasn't broken until his head was out. 🤯😅 Due to what the midwife in hospital was telling me maybe 30 minutes earlier, I didn't listen to my body and thought I had to use the restroom. Good thing a nurse and her trainer heared me, realized what was going on and managed to alert doctors and midwives to help get me on the bathroom floor right when my baby's head came out 🥺. SCARRY 😬😨😱

[@randischneider23]

Can Pax stop being so freakin adorable??!! I can't handle all the Pax Fever

[@eliswiat]

I was amazed by three things after my CC - first, that the area of the incision line is numb, and may stay like that forever. Second, that I was violently shaking after the delivery, because hormones. And lastly - that cloths in "postpartum waste" are a real deal and can be huge.

[@Animalgirl115]

I had a cerebral angiogram in February and my team also without warning or explanation strapped down my legs and put my neck in a restraint. I asked them what was happening and if we were starting surgery because I was still awake and had full feeling, but my team ignored me completely. They previously told me I would not be able to see or feel any part of my surgery, and it turned out that I could see and feel everything. They FINALLY put me all the way under when I had a panic attack. On top of all of that, I was feeling many needles in my legs, which nobody explained to me either. After the operation, I found out it was them “pinning” my nerves to make sure they were all functioning correctly, but my heart goes out to anyone in a similar position like in the Buzzfeed article. It’s very scary to not have any control over your own body and not have the information you need. Sometimes even when you try and stick up for yourself, there’s only so much you can do as the patient.

[@Kait2478]

Contractions after birth: I wish someone would've told me that my baby nursing would make me contract as well. It makes sense knowing what I do now. But at the time it was a huge surprise. My daughter would suck and my body would lurch forward in a violent, uncontrollable contraction for the first few feeds; it was the craziest thing. Also the contractions after birth were much worse than the ones before (I was in labor for a while before a C-section; not sure how far I progressed before the surgery). Hyperemesis: a friend of mine had it and it continued to some degree AFTER, long after birth. Absolutely nuts. Pregnancy brain: early on when the nausea started, I could only imagine eating something from Pizza Hut and something from the Chinese place. my husband, bless his heart, went to both places for me on his way home from work, but asked me to call in the order. I forgot to order his Chinese food, so when he got home, we realized we had food for me from two different places and nothing for him haha. I felt so bad.

[@Moose-boots]

It's not exactly the same sort of contractions, it feels a bit different, but yes, i agree, i hadnt been told about that and the nursing staff didnt really explain what was going on either

[@purpleghost106]

This is definitely one they should explain! I was told but I would have been very worried if I hadn't known because it hurts a *lot* -- It should definitely be a priority to mention

[@klynnanjel809]

Pregnancy will always be one of the most frightening things in the world to me omg

[@hopeswansonsmith4645]

I am firmly in the “will I have any hair left?” stage of postpartum. I’ve never been more thankful for a shower drain cover. 😬 Also, there definitely needs to be more education/conversation about epidural issues. I twitched during my placement so it took a couple tries, and I ended up with a spinal headache. It kept me flat on my back for a week, trying to get as much caffeine and fluids as possible to avoid a blood patch.

[@anncavanaugh3802]

Me too! I had never heard of a spinal headache and I kind of regret not having the blood patch put on right away. Mine lasted almost 2 weeks.

[@OrWhatWeHave]

I'm curious- why would you not want a blood patch for a spinal headache?

[@hopeswansonsmith4645]

@@OrWhatWeHave Trauma response. Not wanting to be stuck for the long procedure. And if I twitched the first time, it was going to happen again, potentially causing more problems. It made more sense to treat with fluids and caffeine in my case.

[@ashtonumphryes7493]

I had hypermesis with my daughter I went from 210 pounds down to 160 pounds in 2 months and my doctor did nothing she didn't even diagnose me with it I found out after we lost/delivered our daughter at 20 weeks and 4 days. I also had no potassium which my new doctor has informed me was probably from the hypermesis which I was not treated for till after our loss. The doctor we had just simply said I was young and was trying to get attention and medication which was not true. I couldn't keep anything down not food or water at one point I was even throwing up blood. I'm very happy we switched and love my new doctor so far but thought I'd share my story. Love u mama doctor Jones! Keep up ur good work 💜

[@NicoleAcedIt]

My French teacher in high school had hyperemesis gravidarum with her first pregnancy and missed months of school. We'd known she was pregnant but weren't told why we had a long-term sub. When our teacher was feeling better and came back to school, she explained to us that her vomiting and diziness were so bad that she literally couldn't get out of bed without throwing up and had to be hooked up to an IV pretty much 24/7 for weeks. We had no idea pregnancy could do that to someone, and the whole class was horrified. That experience isn't why I decided to never be pregnant, but it definitely strengthened that resolve 😬

[@look_its_jess]

I just had my daughter almost 2 months ago. I had severe back labor that was causing constant back spasms for about 9 hours. I wanted to go unmedicated, but because my water broke and my contractions stopped, they put me on pitocin. I honestly couldn't even feel my uterus contracting because all I could focus on was the debilitating back spasms. I eventually got an epidural, and that allowed me to relax enough to get baby in the right position, and I was ready to push 4 hours later. Once it was time to push, I only did it for about 10 minutes, and most of that was waiting for the doctor to get his gloves on. Pushing was absolutely the easiest part of that entire labor. I'm sure the epidural helped, but prior to it, I was in tears from the back spasms.

[@larzinthelibrary2530]

I so relate to the hyperemesis one...I had heard of the condition but I never thought it would happen to me, and I also never expected how little people would take it seriously. A pregnant woman cannot complain about anything, because she is likely to get shamed for it, with responses like, "You should be grateful! Not everyone can have kids! This should be the best time of your life!" etcetc.

[@SmittenKitten.]

I remember getting ready for my c-section and I was butt naked sitting on this ice-cold metal table in the operating room (my baby was Frank breech, so it was a planned section, not an emergency). I was shivering and so embarrassed and HUGE and uncomfortable. It was horrible. Anyway, the anesthetist came in and started the epidural and he kept telling me the drugs that were going in as he was pushing them. When he got to the opioid, I remember this RUSH of warmth that flew through my body, and then I suddenly didn't care that I was butt naked in front of all these people. The nurses laid me back on the table and walked off to get stuff in order and I remember thinking that everyone in the world could be in the room and I wouldn't care because the drugs were making me so loopy. Anyway, I was completely numb from the waist down, like my body didn't really "belong" to me. I started to feel my body kind of rolling to one side like a sack of potatoes. Like, the edge of the table was right there and my body was about to roll off of the side on its own accord. I had NO control. I recall thinking, "Hmm... I'm going to roll off this table. That's kind of funny." A nurse must have seen this happening out of her peripheral vision, and she was like, "Oh no!" and ran over to catch me. I was glad my legs were strapped down after that. Haha.

[@MiffoKarin]

Number six, the hair loss, I experienced something similar when I first started having my period. The doctors couldn't figure out why my hair was falling out, nobody even thought to ask about my cycle, and I didn't think to provide it. In hindsight it's so obvious, especially because it fell out again when getting a hormone IUD. 🙃

[@judith8161]

So many reasons not to get pregnant. As if I needed confirmation, now that I am 42 😂. Glad there are still women who deliberately take the risk of suffering for 9 months straight. Thanks to all the moms out there. You are heroes!

[@hannahp.fletcher9969]

They ARE heroes. I'd never do that to myself but if they're willing power to them.

[@athenaamethyst8385]

Thank you for talking about hyperemesis gravidarum. I had it during my second and latest pregnancy and it was terrible. I had to take 12 pills a day (3 different medications) of anti-nausea meds just to keep some of my food and water intake down. I was still nauseous 24/7. I was extra exhausted from it. All while taking care of my then 2 year old.

[@athenaamethyst8385]

It's honestly one of the reasons I never want to be pregnant again.

[@athenaamethyst8385]

Also back labor!!! Had it with my first...and we're pretty sure it was because she was born hand first and her elbow was towards my back... We joke that she wanted to wave hello to the world. (Her shoulder and everything was perfectly okay!)

[@kellyann305]

When I got diagnosed with pcos this channel helped me know I’m not sterile and it’ll be okay. Now I’m watching while pregnant. Thank you

[@Taylor-tx7uu]

Thank you as always for all the high quality educational content!

[@soulfoodsmama2980]

Nobody told me I had hyperemesis for the longest time I just kept losing weight nonstop with each pregnancy and was bullied terribly for it because “pregnancy is supposed to make you fat” I weighed 125lbs before I had my first daughter and when I gave birth and lost all my amniotic fluid, placenta and baby in my belly I ended up weighing like 100lbs because I had burned up so much of my weight from morning sickness. When I got pregnant with my first son(second baby) I was 100lbs to start and ended up at almost 85-90 after. With my second son(3rd live birth) I had gone vegan which helped me maintain above 95 but i remember having such bad morning sickness with him I fainted. Now I just have another 9 month old daughter and I’m still struggling to heal from all the weight loss that happened from her birth. Maybe people like me aren’t very common but we definitely exist. Thanks mama doc. ✌🏽❣️

[@kimberlypaniagua6411]

I really wish we knew what we would get. I am afraid of getting that. I hate nausea and vomiting. I always cry I hate it so much. Also it would be nice to know prior to pregnancy whether one should lose a little weight or gain some...

[@SapphireSeahorse494]

Thank you for spreading information! It's important for people to be educated. Although I do feel like your channel has helped me learn a lot of things I don't plan on needing to know, but I know they are very helpful for lots of other people!

[@QJJ245]

I too had HG. No one believed me until I had to go into the ER for dehydration bc I was done being not listened too and needed help as I was passing out and losing weight drastically. Eventually I switched OBs and got a better OB who listened to me more. Not perfect but at least better.

[@AzureFlameVirus]

I'll probably never be pregnant as a choice but I think this is still important to know.

[@sazsmith1543]

Yepp ! HG sufferer here. Got a late diagnosis coz I thought for weeks I was just pathetic and it was normal and finally (completely bed ridden, keeping nothing down). Finally hubby dragged me to the doctor and while he gave me meds that helped even then I wasn't officially diagnosed when I ended up in hospital for a few days. I wish I had known it was even a thing. I had an amazing care team and was always treated well but from support groups I know most women have to advocate hardcore just to get IV drips in hospital. Thank you for talking about it ❤

[@sarah-phillips]

Thank you for this! While there are for sure these things that happen, sometimes what happened happened to that particular person. I think it's really good to point those things out so people aren't worried that it is something that happens in every single pregnancy, but I really appreciate when we know what's in the realm of possibility. Also to know that normal means so many things.

[@jlang]

Dear Mama Dr Jones. I know you've been here a while, and I know this comment is likely to never be seen, but just wanted to welcome you to NZ and say thanks for coming here and choosing to support our healthcare system at a time when resources are so stretched. Your advocacy for gynaecological health is so impressive and admirable and inspires me to step up and share information like this with my friends and acquaintances, regardless of their gender (in context, ofc).

[@Darknienna08]

I'm experiencing the 12 week post partum shed right now. My mom actually asked if I got a hair cut because she noticed that it was less wild and full. Of course I'm also dealing having to detangle my hair from my baby's every fold. Its madness.

[@kerrythurlow8037]

Oh, how I remember the epidural with my third and largest child. The left side of my body was completely pain-free. The right side of my body was on fire with pain. My only concern was that the anesthesiologist communicated that before beginning the tubal ligation, my ob-gyn needed to wait for me to be anesthetized before beginning the procedure. I'm with you on pregnancy brain... it's real, very real.

[@CrownedLily]

As someone with Cyclic vomiting syndrome (with episodes lasting 2 weeks), I have anxiety and even trauma around throwing up. So I have a fear of getting Hyperemesis gravidarum. So, I had telogen effluvium after having covid - and it was horrible!! I cried and cried as my thick hair became so thin. Almost 2 years post my covid infection and my hair is just now starting to get thick again. So I fully understand the post pregnancy hair loss and dreed it.

[@CK_Loves_Tea]

Mama Doc, did you, perchance, only apply your lovely pink eyeshadow to one eye? It's a great shade. Your eyes look more intense & you can see little flecks of grey & hazel. But while one eye has that lovely pop of pink, the other is rocking that no-makeup look. Both are a great time, I'm just curious to know whether it was intentional!

[@haileyr_thomas]

Thank you thank you THANK YOU for talking about Hyperemesis! I had it with my first with little medical help due to them not diagnosing me and I’m now preparing for a second pregnancy with a new medical team that already seems to be a world different🙏🏼 Would love a more in depth video on HG!

[@jessicaroseelizabethp.7911]

I appreciate you sharing your experiences. I became really dehydrated after a lot of vomiting in pregnancy and so I spent a couple nights at the hospital at the end of my 1st semester with I.V. fluids and for treatment with another issue too. I hope pregnant women will communicate with their medical providers to get assistance if hydrating and getting fed are issues.

[@henriettajsoneskelin7806]

I find you're speech very therapeutic, can watch you explain medicine for hours and just feel safe, calm, positive and energized simultaniously. I often read questions or worries in my online group of moms that trigger the memory of some information you've covered in a video and I pass on your message to them!

[@tinkeramma]

I love listening to MDJ. It feels just like talking to a best friend or big sister who also happens to be a board certified OBGYN and can get real.

[@laurenmorriseidson4009]

Its so interesting that you said that men that their partner is pregnant can have a sort of pregnancy brain. Im 30 weeks pregnant with twins and my husband has gotten really forgetful and i joked with him he had pregnancy brain and then we came up with the dad version being "daddy disorientation!"

[@amberlytheharpyqueen]

Since I am currently 17 weeks pregnant with my first baby I always get excited when I see an upload like this. It kinda helps put my mind at ease a bit.

[@InfinitelyASMR]

To all the future mamas reading: don’t wait till you have 5% weight loss / any other diagnostic criteria you’re told. Get help, educate yourself on anti-sickness meds that can help (many are safe for pregnancy). I went through this in my pregnancy and had no idea what was normal as it was my first pregnancy. Luckily my healthcare professional told me I shouldn’t suffer as much and supported me in getting medication which didn’t stop the nausea and vomiting completely but made me able to function, eat and drink for the five months I had it.

[@jkell2888]

I’m honestly disappointed that you have not made a video about ovarian cysts yet. Lots of women experience them and it would be helpful to hear your opinions, especially on treatment of more complex cysts. We hear all the stuff about babies and pregnancy… I’ve been waiting for an ovarian cyst video and I’ve suggested it a lot… I hope you make one eventually

[@Beena2020]

Lol I think the hospital staff wished they tied my hands down for my c section. I don't remember any of this, but my husband told me I sat up and started pulling the curtain down. Apparently the anesthesiologist wrestled me down and put me out HARD! I don't remember seeing my baby for the first time, I don't even remember holding her for the first time. I don't know what happened but it was weird. Is this common?

[@lynnefox2807]

I've had hyperemesis twice and it's so hard when healthcare professionals are dismissive of it until you are at a crisis point. Thanks for mentioning it - people don't get it at all and don't understand how debilitating it is.

[@daniellegerber3908]

I'm ADD (ADHD), never been pregnant. My sister is not ADHD, and has had two babies. Based on her behavior, I totally believe pregnancy brain is a thing. She was forgetting things constantly, couldn't keep her train of thought, etc. I said "Welcome to my world" 🤣 Side note, she also had hyperemesis gravidarum.

[@CompositorBane]

I had HG from week 5 to delivery. So glad I'm here in the UK and had a great health team. But was still hospitalised 3 times

[@VGatorS]

I remember being surprised when my arms were "tied to the table" during my c-section...loosely secured with a strap is a better description. It was an unplanned c-section after 21hrs of labor (nearly 4 was pushing) with my big-headed OP baby. When the doctor told me she strongly recommended the c-section, to my own surprise I completely lost it and was a devastated, emotional wreck. I got it together for the most part by the time they got me in the operating room. Having been awake for 30hrs, I was pretty delirious so everything was a blur. I vaguely remember someone telling me they had to secure my arms, and I feel like they said something about being for safety but I honestly don't remember the full explanation. I thought it was weird but at that point I was so exhausted I didn't care and was fully satisfied with whatever they told me. At some point after it began I think they took off one or both straps. Everyone in the room was super caring, comforting, and warm, so that helped. Sometimes I think the whole experience is just SO MUCH that we forget what we're told or don't even process the information we're given. My husband remembers so many details that I don't.

[@backwoodsbaby92091]

I was wondering if you could do a video about miscarriages, and what to expect during and the weeks after. Like what happens to your body and when your period starts again, when it's safe to try again etc. ♡♡♡

[@christademarco5602]

First-trimester uterine pain. Yeah, thought I was just about to have a period when I decided to try a test because I was a little late, and we were trying. It felt like for the first month like I was going to have my period at any moment. It was very stressful because I wasn't sure if I was miscarrying or if it was normal. My sister said it was normal, as it's your uterus expanding and growing. She's had two pregnancies. My OB confirmed at my first visit it was normal. With menstral cramps, I'd just throw on a heating pad and take midol. But I just had to sit there and grin and bare it with my pregnancy. Fortunately, it subsided and I haven't had too much pain in the second trimester. Waiting to see how that changes in the third.

[@irinakl441]

Yes! I had it in my first pregnancy. Didn't know what they were and actually ended up going to the ER, because I was afraid there was something wrong with the pregnancy and I might miscarry.

[@helgabutz8232]

My first trimester uterine pain was so bad that at the hospital they thought I was going to miscarry and wanted to interrupt the preganancy because my hcg levels and ultrasound pictures were not developing "normal". I cried soooo much because I felt "ok, when a professional is telling you to abort than that's what you have to do" but everyone kept telling me to wait, not have the intervention and in case to miscarry naturally. The pain went on and the doctor was not pleased that i did not want the intervention. A few hours later other blood test reults came back which apparently were more promising so i waited and eventually went home and my son developed normally. The pain never went completely away, even in my second pregnancy.

[@sadiehgt1]

I developed autoimmune Progesterone dermatitis with urticaria after pregnancy. My symptoms were cyclic and I had asthma and dermatographism during the time of the month when Progesterone is elevated. I ended up having to go on lupron and a total hysterectomy to remove my ovaries. Later we discovered that I am also allergic to estrogen when we tried hrt. So if you are experiencing asthma symptoms after pregnancy you should get it checked.