Why Are Men So Quick To Use The Word SELFISH!!!

[@Enriquez2222]

Black men be the first to talk when most don’t even care for their own… please 🙄

[@radioqueenbee7008]

This right here!!

[@queeniequeen949]

💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯

[@coast2coast8306]

👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

[@chakradjuzeus9275]

Leave color out of it.

[@weaveandwelfaretookblackme]

​@@chakradjuzeus9275blk males don't take care of their kids

[@omgcarsonnn]

Well, I think it’s selfish for a man to sit here and be fat and gluttonous and not help his wife raise his children but yet that happens all the time.

[@the8thchurch461]

And they wonder why women do not want that anymore.

[@queeniequeen949]

ALL OF THIS!!!!! 💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯

[@TOFFEETASTICC]

Yup. When I’m out in public (restaurants and malls) and I see a father standing around while their wives are busy with the kids I will glare at the father so that he’ll take the hint and help his wife. Public disproval works. 😕

[@eumeliacorona9824]

😂😂😂

[@kayshawnsimmons5585]

They sound crazy, these are the same clowns who say they don't date women with children and always give excuses why they shouldn't pay child support 😒😑🤡🤛🏾

[@individualm6712]

When he said selfish he was not talking about selfish to the kids. He meant she is being selfish to him and men in general for not giving them access to their lineage. This threatens the order of patriarchy.

[@hardcandy71287]

THIS!!! they try to make it seem like it’s for the kids, but they’re really pissed that you’re taking away a chance for a male to impregnate us. passing on their dna is a male’s number one biological drive. that’s why they take such an affront to child free women.

[@riareed1269]

Exactly

[@ashleymandigo4406]

Why is this not the top comment 🤔

[@chocolatenikki]

THIS!!!!!

[@Mama5ive]

Exactly!!!!!! 👍🏽

[@Childfree334]

And MEN were born to work, build, hunt, and provide for their women and kids, but I don't see them making videos about men being "SELFISH" for not doing those things. Men do not help women be pregnant or have babies, so why should women help men provide? 🤔

[@Youwish34]

💯

[@ecclairmayo4153]

Exactly! Way too many lazy men sitting around for this to be their purpose

[@attitudeproblem6462]

But it's _not_ selfish to deliberately impregnate someone and then leave them holding the burden??

[@Enriquez2222]

Right, didn’t they tell us to choose better? And now they’re mad lol

[@gjinkalla23]

​@@Enriquez2222❤

[@queeniequeen949]

ALL OF THIS!!!!!! #decenterdusties #bestbirthcontrol👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

[@juliebella1221]

Oh, no. Don't be logical. Men are allergic to logic and reasoning and especially empathy.

[@mammajamma4397]

THAT MF PARRRRRRTTTTTT

[@sh5n15]

yes gals its selfish to not put your own life at risk for a child that isn’t guaranteed to turn out to live a long time or be a good person 🤪

[@idreadFell365]

I appreciate the use of the word “gal.” Most people refer to women as girls without realizing how infantilizing it is where as they refer to men as guys.

[@tammykinstrue9849]

And that is almost guaranteed to tell you at least once in their life 'Mom, I didn't ASK to be here!' 😆

[@yashyashwanth5888]

@@idreadFell365 women ☕☕☕☕

[@yashyashwanth5888]

I wish your mother should thought this bcuz you one of the person who is a evil

[@TOFFEETASTICC]

@@yashyashwanth5888 incelibates 😕☕️☕️☕️

[@CapricornQueen7425]

Women shouldn't have to explain why she doesn't want to have kids. She really doesn't have to have a reason at all. She just doesn't want to have kids. No -- is a complete sentence.

[@biblethumper8088]

Exactly. I don't even understand why these women are talking so much. They care too much. Just say no.

[@michelleandreya7208]

💯!!

[@b_b_b5146]

Not wanting to have children is not selfish. It's common sense. Selfish is telling a woman what to do with her own life and uterus. Selfish is trapping women with a baby when she's not ready to be mother or straightforward don't want to or can't be a good mother. It's evil, indeed.

[@yashyashwanth5888]

I would be happy if your mother aware of this so she can be happier not giving you birth bcuz she also felt the same way

[@MysteriousVirScorpio]

​@yashyashwanth5888 Fortunately, her mom had the choice to use her own womb to have a child. Even more fortunately, this lady also has the choice whether to use her womb or not. Should random humans have the right to tell other humans what to do with their own organs such as the uterus, t3sticles, lungs, kidneys, liver, etc?

[@TOFFEETASTICC]

@@yashyashwanth5888Well her mother already gave birth to her so her feelings are irrelevant tbh. Y’all make these statements then wonder why your adult children cut contact with you. 😕🤷🏾‍♀️

[@TOFFEETASTICC]

Selfish is bringing children into poverty and dysfunction too. Half the people shaming childfree people are just bitter about their bad choices and want as many people to suffer along with them. 😕

[@b_b_b5146]

@@yashyashwanth5888 I don't give a damn about what my mother thinks and you shouldn't give either. She was the last woman in this world that should have been a mother. A covert narcissistic borderline sociopathic female who almost destroyed her two daughter's lives. Luckily enough, she destroyed her life in the process and she's not even alive today!

[@TheCoffeeCat]

Because THEY are selfish and all men ever do is project their own flaws onto us.

[@kayshawnsimmons5585]

I think this is about them wanting unprotected sex. They most degenerate group of males who cry about child support and do the least when they are in the house with their kids calling a woman selfish is a joke🤡🤛🏾😒😑

[@nawakaida7499]

When I told my mom I wasn’t planning to have any kids, she looked at me with such sadness and worry and asked me “but who will take care of you when you get old?” And it was at that moment that I realized that she thought I was going to take care of her when she’s old. If she didn’t take care of me when I was young, why would she think I would take care of her when she’s old? Being a parent means more than just giving birth. Anyone can have a kid. Not everyone can be a parent. Self awareness helps avoid creating childhood trauma. It takes strength to recognize your weaknesses and act accordingly and responsibly. My mom and dad had no business reproducing. THAT was a selfish act.

[@Youwish34]

💯

[@biblethumper8088]

Yeah, my mother used to say, your going to take care of me when I'm older right? She would even say that in her culture it's the youngest child's responsibility to do so. Growing up all I did was focus on taking care of my mother. Meanwhile she only helped my older sister. So now, all I can say is I wish her the best of luck because I don't have it like that.

[@vangu2918]

I'm so sorry for you, but that is my reason too.

[@ecclairmayo4153]

​@biblethumper8088 - it's crazy that they focus in the oldest but want the oldest to take care of them!

[@anka6356]

Does that man realize how discriminatory he sounds toward women who are sterile by saying: "That's your purpose on this Earth."? Mind-boggling.

[@Itsavibeha]

They call us selfish for not wanting a baby but don’t want to take care of their children 😂😂😂 make it make sense

[@queeniequeen949]

THIS here. 🥰🙌🏾💯🥰🙌🏾💯🥰🙌🏾💯

[@VeeKayGreenerGrass]

Children are not a legacy. Children are your lineage. Legacy is your thoughts, ideas, wealth, education on building and retaining wealth, that they inherit from you. If you want a legacy, build something for your children to inherit.

[@anka6356]

Or write a book or something.

[@CordeliaWagner]

Legacy is overrated. It comes from an artigant egocentric mindset.

[@VeeKayGreenerGrass]

@@CordeliaWagner true

[@lovelykiyah7415]

and another thing I think you are using the term linage to loosely🤔 NORMALIZE TO STOP GETTING PREGNANT WITH A ONE NIGHT STANDS, AND MAKE BELIEVING OR CONFUSING YOURSELFS AND OTHERS THAT THEY ARE LINEAGES 🤔💀🙄‼️

[@VeeKayGreenerGrass]

@@lovelykiyah7415 it's *lineage. Thank you for your contribution? 🤔

[@jlcii]

It kills me how the person that is only involved in the creation of the child by firing off their seed into a woman's womb, and typically does little to nothing to actually be involved in the caretaking of that child outside of maybe Financial support, has the nerve to call a woman selfish because she doesn't want to sacrifice her body, her mental and emotional well-being, her goals and dreams, and her very life to be responsible for a life she doesn't bring into this world alone. But because she's the one that bears the actual labor in bringing forth that life physically, she's the one expected to shoulder most of what comes with raising and caring for that life. It's true what they say, if men were forced to have to carry the pregnancy themselves, there would be far, far less babies born in this world.

[@fantym1633]

If men were required to carry the pregnancy, there would be an "convenience " clinic on every corner

[@ana-nim]

They don't even carry any seed, they just fertilize the seed that women already have.

[@queeniequeen949]

YES!!!!!!! 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

[@riareed1269]

And on top of only being financially involved ( which most aren’t by choice) money is an artificial resource, created by mn to feel important and make wmn dependent upon them. It was just a way to level the war between sexes in their favor. They’re the selfish ones.

[@Meow4B]

And these men who think that paying a couple hundred dollars a week in child support means the woman is living off their money 😂😂😂😂 BRUH that doesn’t even cover her hourly wages at minimum wage for getting that kid up and getting it to school, doing dinner bath and bedtime. Or the extra bedroom she has to rent to house that child. But they’ll go and pat themselves on the back for paying the minimum required amount of child support, then God forbid the mom buys a coffee on the way to pick up the kid from school and they start screaming about how she’s not using the child support for the kid.

[@jewdy8915]

I never had kids because I never dated a man that I felt I could trust to be a good father. Why would I want to be a single mother?

[@madeline7187]

Omg..its so true..!!!❤

[@jartisteobscure3992]

YES! This is exactly why I waited too. (Reckless ) People say : there's never a good time to have kids so why not start now? I firmly believe that's NOT true. I waited for the right time for us (feeling stable and mature emotionally , spiritually, financially) and I'm so so glad I did!

[@dontme4132]

They're projecting. It is THEM who's selfish. Not the woman they're accusing.

[@kayshawnsimmons5585]

The most degenerate Males on earth calling a woman anything is laughable and clownery at best🤡🤛🏾😒😑

[@riareed1269]

The way they participate in the creation of children is biologically selfish. They’re selfish all the way down to their chromosomes.

[@XX-le1wn]

@@ZKZKZK818 🤨What the hell are you talking about? What does THAT have anything to do with women not wanting kids?

[@ZKZKZK818]

@@XX-le1wn because the social services that take care of you in old age will not be around because people en masse chose to be childless

[@justb4116]

Tl;dr: it's gonna be ok, one way or another it's going to be how it has to be Plummeting birth rates is temporary, self correcting problem All humanity will not collapse. Civilisation may, but not humanity Phoenix and stuff Only the ones that reproduce will carry along the story of humanity through their offsprings So no matter how many times we build civilisation to this point, we will always look for ways to make it work. Learning *something* in the process This same process is encoded in *the* whatever makes life happen Chaos/emptiness/potential V Recognition/stream/acceleration V Order/fulfilment/actualisation V Destruction/exploration/deceleration Chaos/emptiness/potential V Recognition/stream/acceleration V ...

[@tajr.2650]

How about he do a video on how selfish men are and don’t show up for their kids? I’m sure he’s got plenty of homeboys he can interview. 💅🏾

[@justinebailey5333]

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@T_Cup]

A lot of men don't get it because their life doesn't change after the birth of children, it's still all about them once the kids are born. Or if things do change and the mother centres the child/children, these same men who insist on having kids will go onto leave their wives looking for what they had before their kids were born with other, child-less women

[@Emiliapocalypse]

It’s like some of em have no capacity for trying to think of things from another person’s perspective. They should listen to women when we say the bulk of the work goes on us, and realize how little their own lives change. With a little self reflection they should realize the only thing the new woman has is “newness”, and the reason that shine apparently wore off his wife is because of the whole new life _he gave her_ after having kids. Kind of amazing so few of them realize this, even lots of the nice-seeming dudes

[@T_Cup]

@@MyriamRichardsdotter Thing is, what from? The dads I know that like their kids make those kids their entire world, and do everything their partners do. The men that don't, well, frankly don't do anything with for for their kids. They work because it benefits themselves, the kids sure but only by extension. So what are they even trying to escape from?

[@tammykinstrue9849]

The mom that admitted that most parents procreate for selfish reasons was dead on. Many parents want to see mini versions of themselves & their partners & perpetuate their genes. Otherwise, they would foster & adopt the countless numbers of children that are already here and need families.

[@corsicanlulu]

Exactly

[@ineedhoez]

Facts

[@chaoticodin09411]

This is the same man that said he would leave his partner if they gained 20lbs LMFAO

[@anka6356]

King of dusties.

[@OGfromQueens]

Also have you ever seen child birth?! It's excruciating!!! Men cry about stomach flu. FOH!!!

[@kayshawnsimmons5585]

They are spreading this propaganda to get sex they don't want kids for real, they want unprotected sex at the woman's expense 👹🤛🏾

[@Faeishly9]

They cry about common colds as if they're dying.

[@NiasGoldUniverse]

WHEW!!! FOH FR😂

[@veronicamarie83]

Men cry about a mild case of the sniffles.

[@XX-le1wn]

How about those videos where they simulate period cramps. Most women barely react while most men: "AHHHHHHHH!!!"

[@ccannon1]

I always say “well I can be selfish because I don’t have kids…that’s the point. It would be worse if I were selfish WITH kids.”

[@Itsallaboutlove52]

They complain but when their women gets pregnant they’re quick to say you have no value.

[@gabrielleabraham5773]

Exactly

[@ineedhoez]

Facts. Baby mommas with 9 kids should be exalted right?

[@Itsallaboutlove52]

@@ineedhoez who are you to judge her but not speak of the man/men. You can. Roti e her when women are able to get themselves pregnant.

[@DivaDivine88]

Who the hell is he to tell someone what they're born here to do?? Only God and the individual has that power.. its the unmitigated arrogance for me ✋🏾🙄

[@TheNaturalStateTX]

We listen to them and we are still wrong. Y’all (men) been telling us not to get pregnant and choose better. Don’t be a baby mama or single mom…..now we are doing that and we are selfish. Once they figure out what they truly want and not what society tells them to want, we will all be better off.

[@dugongsdoitbetter]

So many of us have soooo much trauma that not having a child is the opposite of being selfish!!!! It's the most loving and caring thing one can do.

[@kayshawnsimmons5585]

Exactly, these clowns think women are supposed to be long suffering and going thru stress so they can say see you should have chosen better 🤡🤛🏾

[@SAPHYTYRA]

THIIIISSS!!!!!

[@ToniaAlex13]

Finally, someone else said it. All the reason I have heard ppl give for having kids was a selfish reason. Yet ppl who don't have kids are selfish. Okay cool

[@alexajay6896]

Literally they be selfish af putting kids through nonsense to fill a void.

[@kayshawnsimmons5585]

They are miserable and trash parents

[@ineedhoez]

​@@alexajay6896omg yes!!!

[@FearfullyandWonderfullyMade.]

Some West African man got upset when I said, “I don’t want kids.” He tried to use culture, American culture etc. Bruh, I’m East! My immediate family understands why. You’re not my immediate family. I don’t know you at all. He couldn’t handle the push back.

[@the8thchurch461]

Those West African men are the worst misogynists ever. You met the absolute worst and so did I. I come from a woman respecting Southern African country where women have agency in their lives. I spoke to this disgusting misogynistic man from West Africa and told him that there is not a single stay at home mother in my home country and he was seriously upset! He promised to marry a woman from my home country and make her 1 of his 4 wives. I said a Motswana woman won't agree to such rubbish and he said she will, angrily! Unbelievable.

[@sg5720]

They called us selfish because this is who they are. They are shocked that we as women can be as selfish as them, and in telling them no kids for me, that is like a rejection to them. They expect women to do exactly as they want. They don’t see women on a human level like them- they see women as the “better human being” naturally, so women being able to give life not wanting to use that power is strange to them. It is literally the only thing that women have to need a man for, so taking that little bit of importance away from him, it is shocking to him and selfish, they think women are pushover because that is how it has been, but women just want to live. Times are changing. 🤷🏽‍♀️

[@shewhowrites101]

They naturally respond like this. I had a male friend who was offended, and he wasn’t even in the running as a Candidate for the Womb. They stay fake concerned over People & things that don’t directly affect them 🥴 They got some DSMV updating to do 😮‍💨

[@kae.llarella]

Let’s normalize telling all people to mind their business and stop creating broken homes and traumatized humans.

[@MissKashira]

The number one reason I hear people give for having a child is to have someone to take care of them when they are old. It cost a quarter of a million to raise a kid. Why not save that money and hire someone to wipe your butt than birth someone and gamble that they will be both willing and able to wipe your butt when the time comes?

[@lilylovesyoule]

Don’t burden them with logic 😂 this very simple solution doesn’t occur to them because that would require foresight and for them to be fiscally responsible. How are they going to flex on social media and plan for retirement and aging at the same time?

[@burmessafox3939]

My guess is because they think people who's not related to them would steal from them or mistreat them

[@biblethumper8088]

Exactly. The money and stress they would've saved from not having children could ay for a caretaker. At the very least they wouldn't need it because they would've aged well.

[@sephy7733]

@@burmessafox3939 The funny thing is, their children could do all those things to them. There is no guarantee that your kids will like or love you, even if you raise them with love 🤷🏾‍♀️

[@ineedhoez]

If you take that 250k and invested (got the average s&p return) over 30 years, you'd have 5 million dollars. Just saying

[@misslola007]

I support childfree women. Don't pay no mind those who want to trick you. At this point, women need to keep in mind that they should have a child knowing there is a higher chance of doing it alone. You are worst off if your own family cannot help. You need a village and the village is quiet when the child is born.

[@queeniequeen949]

THANK YOU!!! 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

[@aylanae4797]

Agree...only thing id add is why was the village quiet. To many of us get pregant don't have little to no expectations from BD but the fam is supposed to pause what they got going on. On top of all the free labor but then wanna say thats not "your child"

[@misslola007]

@@aylanae4797 I understand what you mean and it always depends on the situation. Those who are reckless with their womb will learn the hard way. BUT, even with the father present, you need help when both parents are working. Relying only on the father is a foreign concept to some of us. Me and my ex rely on his mother. I couldn't count on mine. Without the help of his mom, I wouldn't have recovered from postpartum and getting back to work. Family in general need each, so you pour into ppl who pour into you. I would drop everything to go help my ex mother in law but not so much for my own mother. It's truth that nobody owes anyone anything but it comes easy when they have been there for you. We are social creatures and we are not meant to do things alone. Those special cases are different.

[@aylanae4797]

@misslola007 I definitely agree! I'm glad you do have a support system, and the fact that you have it is a blessing, especially today. I'm just saying that, for the most part, you see the latter I know I have just people being reckless and expecting their village to be their rock, co-parent, etc. Then when the villagers who "do the right thing" get an education, work, save , get married and have a kid, when they need help the same ones who received don't reciprocate or feel they want to live their lives. Generally speaking. I definitely remember the village growing up. My mom doesn't have the healthiest relationship, but we are doing OK. I just feel their need to be a balance of men and women actively doing and being because I know so many of our own big mama's, gmas, etc..passed to early from all th stress. A village is needed, but communication, respect, gratitude, and empathy need to be some of the core characteristics .

[@biblethumper8088]

​@@misslola007your Village should include men. I hope your father and grandfather and father in law are helping you when you need it. That is unfair to expect women to always help with children.

[@divamarvalousoneal2454]

I think in general to give the kids the momma's last name. Men's like this don't need to be around anyone let alone children

[@LoveAndSnapple]

They use the word 'selfish' because we're bred and engineered to be everything BUT that. That's like calling a man 'useless'. We're always told to put others first and to bed and break for others.

[@daysoftheboo]

The health consequences of the mother for breeding and the health consequences of the child for existing , men don't care about that

[@ineedhoez]

If a woman's highest purpose was to have kids, why isn't the baby momma with 9 kids treated like the Queen of England?

[@michalovesanime]

Ive had a man I had no intention of dating, one I barely knew ( he lived in my neigberhood and wed often talk) get mad and me and calling me out my name for A. Not being religious B. Not wanting kids. We had no romantic connection and he had a girlfriend. I was clear I had no interest in him.. He took it sooo personally. It was actually scary how he switched up for NO REASON. Some weird type of male entitlement or something cuz I literally couldnt care less if a man im not involved with wants kids or is religious. I keep my opinion to myself cuz their life has nothing to do with me. Weird creepy behavior

[@jacquelynn2051]

You ruined his fantasy. They ALWAYS will fantasize about women. Anywho, not your problem.

[@b_b_b5146]

Very creepy and very telling on this odd Male's entitlement over women's bodies and lives, even if he doesn't know those women at all. If he has kids and feel unhappy in his religious organization, he's probably jealous or envious of you. Please, stay safe and keep your distance from that weirdo. When it comes to weird neighbors, I know how awful and terrifying it can be.

[@kmoon33]

Men since the beginning a human kind have treated women as processions. A father got to choose his daughter’s husband or even sold her. Then the husband got to use her as his own personal servant, child bearer and at times punching bag. It’s only recently that women have been able to be seen as worth something outside of serving men and they hate it.

[@mammajamma4397]

Literally the same thing happened to me! I had to physically t hreaten him to get him off my back!

[@ineedhoez]

Yeah... definitely don't disclose the real you to ANYONE who has not earned it.

[@leanysealvarado7499]

But they’re not being selfish while dodging child support?!? 😂😂😂 miss me with that 😂😂😂

[@timoneek444]

I believe in this same video this same man said he would leave his woman if she gained 20 pounds. Here’s another reason why no one should have a child by him. It’s a set up….they playing games. Men see nothing wrong with being selfish…they live that way.

[@dallasflynn5200]

May we start a thread called, “Things to Say When Men Comment Negatively to Women Who Remain Child-free”? (Doesn’t have to be the real reason you choose to not have kids and the sillier and more sarcastic and funny and savage your comment is…? The BETTER it is! ❤❤❤) I’ll go first: 1. “I’m remaining child-free so that I can take in and help all the children abandoned by their baby daddies.” 2. “I’m remaining child-free because I want to replace my dusty man’s mom in his life…make him the center of my life…kids get in the way of that. Of course, he will break up with me because I won’t become his baby’s mama, but I will just pick up another dusty. They’re everywhere!” 3. “I’m remaining child-free because I’m a h0e-bag and don’t have the moral compass to raise innocent children.” (IF you want the man to run away from you immediately then try saying this: “Since I’m a h0e and you’re evidently a godly, strong king of a man, I think I am in love with you, and would YOU make a baby with me and raise it?” Have fun, ladies. We all deserve it. ❤❤❤

[@michelleandreya7208]

😂😂😂👌🏿

[@IDontlikeubutGIVEmeyourMONEY]

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 *_Hell naw. I love it._*

[@adaofcharles1217]

😂😂😂 so on point

[@ineedhoez]

😂😂😂😂😂.... that marriage and family one took me out!!!

[@Reetwina]

I wonder what would be his response if she called him selfish for not wanting to marry these women who they impregnate.

[@Lokian_Mermaid]

Being entitled like him is extremely selfish

[@kayshawnsimmons5585]

This is about them wanting unprotected sex, that's it. 😒😑

[@digimonalvatrax2738]

Of course being in a relationship which requires you to only provide not engage with the kids but still be served a hot pot of fresh soup and meat for doing nothing...I can see why a lot of men bend over backwards to brainwash women to get married and have children. Let it be reversed all of a sudden we have a category for Hgtow(husbands go their own way)🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

[@Lokian_Mermaid]

@@kayshawnsimmons5585 That too. But my point is, when ppl, most often men, get their feelings hurt that a STRANGER isn't interested in them and they then lash out, that's due to their entitlement. They're so in love with their demonic selves, that they think they're entitled to anyone they want and how dare any woman reject them.

[@kayshawnsimmons5585]

@@Lokian_Mermaidyour absolutely right

[@levelupgoddess9289]

Yep it’s one the gaslighting words they love to use. Anytime a Black Woman puts herself first before ur without kids and a man then you’re selfish. I LOVE being selfish. I have been told I’m selfish since I was a child and I say thank u. I LOVE being selfish and I’ll ALWAYS be.🥰🥰🥰🥰

[@IDontlikeubutGIVEmeyourMONEY]

*_Same here. I love being selfish, the benefits are peaceful and more freedom_*

[@AstroBaby91]

I love my children so much that I don't want to bring them to this dimension.

[@yuelianghime1111]

I remember one time i was with this guy ( we were not dating) and we were having a conversation about kids and i said " I dont want to have a child with you, because that means i will be stuck with you for life" . He got mad at me. I am sooooooo effing glad i did not go into a relationship with him. He kept on revealing his toxic traits from then on out. GOODBYE.

[@Kattieninja]

It's simply that misery loves company. They're suffering and can't back out of it, so they try to drag everyone else down with them. Full circle, they've become the people that pressured them into having kids in the first place.

[@SylisDaGoldenPeach]

I know I’m not selfish , I’ve always had a big heart for people but the problem comes in when they won’t do the same for me , men seem to think somone owes them something just cuz there good looking or athletic, his looks can’t pay the bills tho or make sure I’m fed and clothed , I have considered just dating women

[@magnarcreed3801]

Way better dating other women. They see you as a person first.

[@yashyashwanth5888]

Victim card

[@yashyashwanth5888]

Don't try to act like men

[@SylisDaGoldenPeach]

@@magnarcreed3801 most definitely sis

[@SylisDaGoldenPeach]

@@yashyashwanth5888 aww you mad stay mad pookie dookie 💩

[@T.E.R.O.N]

As a mother of 5 when sis didn't let his projection steer her my heart jumped for joy...she made me so proud 💯💯

[@1991-present]

Can I ask. Do you find it a lot to handle so many?

[@shinebrightlikeadiamond6411]

The blk lady at the end is so correct a high five to her. All what she said is a list of things many women should think about before having children especially blk women we have gone through so much truma it's unreal. A lot to unpack, honestly a lot.

[@michelleisme6242]

Why are 40+ men talking to 20 something women about their future? Ask him how many kids and how many women and outside of child support how much time he spends with them ask them they birthday favorite color age school anything related to the kids they forcing on you. Then just sit there in silence cause we all know!!!

[@toscadonna]

Men actually talk women out of having kids by their words and actions. Unfortunately, human males cannot use deductive reasoning to ascertain cause and effect. The males in other species know they must provide for and protect their female mate IOT get her to breed with him, but this is lost on human males. It’s interesting to see that male cattle, owls, hawks, and horses are actually more intelligent than human males. Even a male crocodile would fight other males who came into his territory to protect his female crocodile who’s watching over their babies.

[@Youwish34]

💯

[@ineedhoez]

The only men who don't get are anti social.

[@tfkdandsvkc]

Totally agree human males also love each other more,,the way they treat us females is against natural law it's so weird and twisted,, male psychology is wicked

[@MovableNu]

There’s an old fable of a Chicken and a Cow. Chicken says, “Hey, Cow! Farmer does so much for us, we should make Farmer their favorite breakfast!” Cow says, “That’s a good idea, Chicken! Do you know what Farmer likes best to eat?” “Yeah!” Says Chicken. “Eggs and steak!” Never take ANY advice from some Chicken telling you that you “need” to be the Cow.

[@msliberated3899]

Brilliant comment

[@Erintii]

Selfish = cautious and reasonable

[@chadguindon6909]

Choosing not to have children is NOT selfish, I find that pathetically ridiculous. In all truthfulness and honesty, it is actually selfish to have children because it's based on your desire. Children don't ask to be born and when they are here, they have to suffer all the unacceptable hardships and battles that life and humanity have to offer. Society seriously needs to stop telling people to have children when they confirm that they don't want children and that goes for ANYONE!!!!

[@AminahMight]

Baby girl in the pink hit the nail on the head. They don’t even need to be in these conversations because they don’t own a uterus.

[@dumitruedelean59]

I'm so grateful that I live in a place where I'm not judged for choosing to be childfree and actually congratulated on this decision. A month ago I visited an elder (hermit) in the mountains and I've told him about my choice (yes, I've asked an old wise man about it) and he told me that it's the BEST decision for me and that I should be happy about it without feeling any guilt. I'm so thankful to him for his wise words about it. 🙏

[@shaypope4732]

This is what I tell them when they call me selfish I tell them to either push it out themselves or pay me as a surrogate cause why would I do that for love I mean free

[@freshclean8649]

There are women with children who mistreat them. Then they say if she was not going to be a good mother. She should have not had those children. They (males) are so oppositional.

[@IndependentPrettyGirlis]

Boy math 🙄

[@DWPersianExcursion]

It's an emotional reaction

[@kylaarmstrong-benjamin8066]

No, because if men had to be pregnant, give birth, breastfeed and do the majority of the child care, they wouldn't be so keen on "their legacy" 🙄😂

[@purevenus6359]

The last lady hit many nails on the head. Couldn’t agree more.

[@uspeak7]

BE SELFISH LADIES! 🙌 YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE! ☝️

[@nikkisky8720]

Ask the parents who were unalived by their kids because said kids could not get their way. Parents have been offed by kids for simply saying no to buying them a video game system.

[@alexajay6896]

I’m selfish and I don’t have an issue saying it. I have one child and I can’t wait for her to turn 18.

[@sarahcover7248]

Children deserve to be wanted. If you don't want them then don't have them. Its that simple!

[@gabrielleabraham5773]

Exactly

[@zlane6532]

This convo doesn't surprise me at all. They dehumanize women because they're taught that once they get a woman she will serve them and bare them children. Not much of their upbringing is about childrearing, doctors appointments, cooking, cleaning. They think their role is to work and make rules for the home, essentially a CEO with employees. Many men work so that they can have a family and have a managerial role over others. When women say no to this idea, she's taking that away from him and everything he thinks he's worked for. She is selfish for having her own goals/dreams and not conforming to what he's been sold on.

[@areyourhandsbroke]

Spot on

[@ineedhoez]

I am always selfish when I set a boundary.

[@rb5959]

It's wise to be honest with yourself about having children. The amount of neglected, abused, exploited, or killed children is proof positive that parenthood is not for everybody.

[@redsunflower8999]

I love how she came back at him….”that is okey”😘

[@TheDowntownHermit-xj6rq]

Children are a sentence of eighteen to life. You don't even get that for armed robbery!

[@theafroassassin2535]

I find it funny when people confuse purpose with ability. I have the ability to have children, it's not my life's purpose to have them. My purpose is my own to make.

[@soundsaboutright---]

Yo aren't bm always screaming from the mountain tops that bw will give a baby to just any old dude?! Tell him to go find one of the "many" bw that will just pop out a baby for anyone

[@Strawberrypocky911]

21:45 yeah that's me, I have mild Asperger’s that I've been taught my entire life to try and "grow out of", my dad especially told me that.. nowadays my condition is barely noticeable to other people, but I knew how tough it was growing up struggling to learn within the 90's-2000's education system. It'd take me x4-5 times longer to be able to grasp something, and my brain literally could only learn at faster pace with things I was passionate it. But most subject's in school just didn't interest me, and on top of that.. I was born a high empath and being 1/2 Asian a lot of kids treated me like a black sheep so life was just emotionally painful. Both of my parents were narcissists, they'd both insult me every day even though I was their only child because I didn't perform well academically. So, I don't want to have kids, never. I know how hard it is for a neuro-divergent person to navigate themselves in this world, it took me 27 years before I was able to finally greater catch up to knowing how to socially interact with others. And I have a theory why I was born this way, it's cause my dad was 52 when he got my 22 year old mom he brought from overseas who could barely speak English pregnant!! so his seed was weak, but then still had the gall to "blame me" and then would also tell me the only reason why he had wanted a daughter (not a son) was so I'd take care of him when he became elderly 😒since "girls are more family focused."

[@turquesa_8056]

I think it is more selfish to have children and resent them (like my mom was with me) than to choose not to have kids (which is what I did). Then she got mad at me for not having kids. The second part of that definition is in regards to other living people as well. You cannot be selfish to someone who does not even exist. Being concerned chiefly with your pleasure and profits above others is for LIVING people not imaginary people who are not even here. CEO's are selfish when they lay off people but still get their bonuses and pay. Deciding to not have children because you just want to worry about yourself is not selfish it is responsible. Less single parents is a good thing.

[@ellea88]

I have 3 kids: my take: Having kids is like an amplifier. All the good. All the bad. All the happiest times and most despair you’ll ever feel. And I’m totally with you if you choose not to. It was the best thing I’ve ever done and they’re my best friends. But I went through some of my lowest points with them too. Only bring them into the world if you can afford to do it alone in case the man leaves, and as long as you’re mentally stable.

[@ineedhoez]

Your kids should not be your friends. That sounds like codependent enmeshment. Yikes. You gotta heal.

[@ellea88]

@@ineedhoez lemme guess, you’re a baby boomer who couldn’t ever emotionally connect with their children? lol 😂 Don’t project your weird judgments onto me. 😊

[@ms.pirate]

If making a child is selfish, then not adopting is even more selfish. There are 8 billion people on this very earth, and they want to get it too 10 billion?! Also there are alot of kids in adoption centers who could really use a good home! But alot of the people have the nasty stigma that "if you didn't make it, its not you'res" But like I said on comments in older videos. If you don't want kids, don't have them. We are better off not having abusive parents. If a woman really really wants a child, she would!

[@greyonyx08]

I'm a single mom who loves her children but even I encourage people not to have children if they don't want them. I'm actually perplexed how women are still having children on purpose. Those of you who are child free are smart as hell.

[@veronicamarie83]

I’m Childfree at 40 and that will never change because of a complete hysterectomy at 32. I still remember my male teachers, in jr. high and high school, promising that I would “change my mind someday,” when I didn’t want any children. This was back in the nineties.

[@LadyMarigoldWithers]

I am thrilled to say I have not one man in my life who gives a fig what I choose to do with my body or has ever even asked me about having kids so this guy seems ridiculous to me. I _have_ wasted a few years on men who knew my position but were waiting for me to change my mind 🙄 but all the criticism, judgement and pressure I’ve experienced for being childfree has come from female family members and acquaintances.

[@msliberated3899]

Exactly! They are brutally judgmental and mean asf

[@childless-gato-lady]

You don't owe anyone, especially a man, an explanation as to why you don't want kids. If anything, tell them it is bizarre to obsess over what someone else is doing with their own body, sort out what is lacking in their life that is causing this obsession, and Mind Their Own Business.

[@michelleandreya7208]

This!!👌🏿

[@LoveAndSnapple]

Also, it's okay to call yourself "Childless" because you WANTED children, but changed your mind for whatever reason. I always believed that I would have children, but as the years went by I just couldn't see how such a major life event would fit into my life or how I would be financially prepared for them. Also, mothers have been spilling the beans on the true reality of motherhood. And that's what separates human beings from lower animals. To take in new information and make informed decisions based on receiving new information.

[@queeniequeen949]

Yesss! That’s exactly my case. I used to want children but now I’m at a point where I decided not to have them.

[@ineedhoez]

Generally, we say childless when someone still wants kids but doesn't have them for whatever reason. Basically, if you hit the lottery and found your dream partner, would you still want a kid? If no, then you are child free.

[@Iknowwhatiknow-r9e]

How dare I hate children as much as these BM?🤔

[@catmouse2882]

Bm act like they're the only ones allowed to hate their children. 😂

[@YoutubeTeasipper7856]

And the DNA that you connect with really matter when picking your partner and new generarion curses that comes with it for the child.

[@motchiko904]

They see it as selfish towards society. They know that we need children, but they don’t see it as their responsibility to raise and support them as women do. As long as you are together, he will take care, but as soon as the relationship is broken up, they vanish. Women have realized that and choose not to do it. A child is the biggest poverty factor for a woman.

[@Ccl2tb]

It's our job to be selfish, just like them. If he was so worried about being selfless, he would adopt a kid who's already here and raise it himself.

[@ashleymandigo4406]

It's the evil, hateful way he said "WHAT YOU MEAN" for me... like, he took it so personally

[@mandyboo43]

Every conversation with my parents now is about me giving them grandchildren 😂

[@CN33449]

That last womens stitch raised some interesting points. Im childfree and these dicussions are great.

[@CoachLove]

Parenting is for life and leaving a legacy for the lineage is a major responsibility. Most men don't help raise the children and if they do, they stop at 18 because "my kids are grown." Whereas, a mother...she never leaves, always provides, always protects... You know, the way that God is. (God is very likely not a he ,like patriarchy pushes))

[@Ceilingkatwatchesus]

I’m not listening to no one who does not have a womb about children. CUZ THEY DONT HAVE A WOMB, SO THEY HAVE NO SAY 🗣️🗣️😹😹😹they swear their opinion matters in something they have little involvement in.

[@remnant1018]

I would love to hear a few psychologists give an analysis of that conversation and the speakers from multiple schools of thought. I have a strong suspicion they would have negative opinions of the guy’s statement and positive ones of the girl’s. She’s living authentically, deciding what’s best for herself based on her individual values, and taking responsibility for her choices. He’s casting opinions and trying to instruct her in how to live based on _his own_ values and will most likely not partake in the responsibility of the consequences of what he’s telling her to do. Her life is hers and his life is his.

[@lovelydoll1477]

SELFISH TO WHO?! The baby DOESN’T EXIST!!!

[@AdelTheForsaken]

22:23 because of my careless uncle and older brother there are brother sister cousins and my family and a child has full-blown Sickle Cell because they don't do research or ask poignant questions at this point personally it's only the ultra wealthy that appropriate and the excruciatingly stupid. 23:35 misery loves company!

[@mckymcobvious3043]

my mom had an episiotomy when I was born. enough said.

[@ankaro4258]

36 yo still no kids, no regrets that everybody promised me I will have. Since I was twenty everybody were telling me that I will change my mind. I'm still waiting for this to change. So far? Nope. Still don't want any :D Great video!

[@XX-le1wn]

The title of this video reminds me of the talking points used by one of the kids in the Bad Mom's movie. The mom Amy was running for PTA president of something. There was a scene where her kid said "You are so selfish" and "you don't want to be a mom" obvious patriarchal alpha macho talking points used on women for decades. I knew those were macho man talking points because in the Bad Mom's Christmas the same character who said those talking points said them again only meaner and it wasn't just one scene but several. For me it was like towards Hollywood "Do your own dirty work instead of having a kid actor do it for you." The mom Amy's kid's character and Amy's mom's character really made watching the movie a miserable experience. To the point I couldn't finish watching the movie.

[@cvzdez]

❤funny he said he doesn't even like the baby mom. Men don't understand how much we emotional support you need reciprocated reciprocated to be a parent.

[@roaroa5291]

Look at him. Not one single thought behind those eyes.

[@susiebear3316]

I love how they use religious reasons that they barely even follow in order to dictate towards women.