Mark Kermode - Fred: the Movie

[@damienfenton3880]

I really wish they had the webcam cameras at the time of this review.

[@FerenswayRecords]

"Stop! Stop! Fade him out..."

[@ZuluRomeo]

For a moment Simon almost sounded like HAL 9000

[@OsofoGriot]

This review is about 23458339 times funnier than the actual film.

[@heyhonpuds]

You missed a few zeros on the end there.

[@CJODell12]

I think the film broke Mark's sanity.

[@liampendergast8670]

A Serbian Film and Fred: The Movie. That's the double feature from hell right there.

[@jakobsichler8775]

+L Pendergast As we know from the good doctor's Dirty Grandpa review from January a double bill in hell features THREE movies (like Movie 43 & Entourage & Dirty Grandpa). But if you add an Adam Sandler feature to the films you mentioned this will do nicely, I think.

[@irrationalman2363]

That sounds so terrible that I'd like to see a full cinema of people reacting to that, Mark being in one of the front rows

[@PickleSurpriseVEVO]

Two screens, one for each eyes

[@Nathan-gd7xq]

I think the government would put you on some kind of watch list if you watched both of those in succession.

[@BoogDude14]

Oh my god I wish! If they did a livestream of that I'd give my kidneys to watch it Also I think the sound of Marks screams and whimpers were what could be heard the night after he watched it, having terrible nightmares about Mr Figglehorn.

[@19RaxR91]

I wish there was a video recording of this.

[@gothamite27]

I've listened to this so many times over the years and every single time it makes me smile. It's a tragedy that this is from the pre-webcam days. I would pay great big fat stacks of cash to see the Fred impression in live action, not to mention Simon Mayo's exasperated reactions.

[@ZuluRomeo]

This was on the webcam - and it was absolutely hilarious. Sadly 5 Live didn't put the webcam version up.

[@olesandnes1509]

maybe the funniest rant i ever heard

[@sourabhmanhar5637]

This never gets boring. Always return to this on a regular basis.

[@19RaxR91]

Yeah, just relistened to it for the first time in ages - still made me laugh out loud. One of the best movie rants ever.

[@EleanorHucklesby]

"I had to STAY!" The simultaneous outrage and despair of that comment is wonderful. Simon Mayo's own despair is the cherry on top.

[@gothamite27]

I can't stop listening to this. It's just pure comedy from beginning to end. The scathing elegance with which Mayo reads the e-mail that sets the whole thing off, the perfectly ordinary way in which Mark sets up the review. The utterly genuine way in which Mark was absolutely horrified by how much Fred "...screeaams." And then the climax: Mark's gloriously earnest impression with Simon Mayo's disgust.

[@knshinn2]

"A grown man with massive hands"

[@BreakerdeGodot]

GOD I wish I could see Mark's face while he was screeching.

[@gmann6269]

Watch "Kermode Uncut: My worst five films of 2010"

[@chestnutbloke305]

3:31 "I HAD TO STAY!" Oh, the joy of being a film critic! 🤣🤣🤣

[@gothamite27]

I sometimes just listen to this when I need to smile. Arguably the funniest film review of all time.

[@kieranhealy8279]

Yesssss

[@vilentman111]

0:03 Mark sounds genuinely terrified

[@carlkamuti]

I love the listener's nod to The Thick Of It with the "massive hands" comments.

[@Kduck2145]

I caught that as well lol

[@michaelraine6031]

Listen to this at 0.5 speed. Can't stop laughing...

[@Viktors633]

+Michael Raine LOL cheers

[@t_ed2521]

+Michael Raine It reminds me of the scene in Wolf of Wall Street when they've taken all of the lemon quaaludes and they're fighting over the phone.

[@ZuluRomeo]

The beginning sounds like Derek and Clyde. 😜

[@bradmarkmichaelduffy5915]

Aye they sound pissed and it's funny 😄

[@rbdriftin]

The funniest film review I've ever heard.

[@zacharychisholm1032]

Love the chemistry between Kermode and Mayo, gotta say Mark is funny but it wouldn't be nearly as funny without Simon.

[@chuckyoofarley]

3:16 - 3:19 "It was like.... WOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!" *silence* LMAO!!!

[@AJARyan-yn2uv]

Mark actually sounds like the screaming caterpillar from The Simpsons when he screams.

[@neilevans8204]

SCREAMAPILLA!!!

[@dopplereffeckt675]

To compare A Serbian film to Fred-The Movie is utter genius.........

[@milesunsworth6365]

There are 12 5 seconds in a minute There are 1080 5 seconds in 90 minutes Poor Mark

[@questionitall3053]

This is truly the funniest review, of all time, and one of the most accurate too.

[@JasonX2]

I've got to leave, I've got to leave, I've got to go.

[@KRSsven]

I remember listening to this both Live and back on the podcast, and Mark kept the impression up even into the podcast extras. Once they'd done all the podcasty activities Mark sprung the impression on everyone again: 'and I sat there...BLEEEEEEEGH!!!!!' Simon had to fade him out again. One of my favourite podcasts of this show ever.

[@YTPGOD]

this is just plain proof that screaming your head off sometimes is hilarious

[@ninagray4441]

Just listened to this for the first time, so so tired from laughing so hard. Mark is exceptional.

[@ninagray4441]

First time listening again after a year, just as great.

[@nightw4tchman]

I drove a van at work the other day that made me feel exactly like Mark in this video. Someone had crashed it and the reversing sensors screeched at you the entire time.

[@mpickles6795]

With all that's going on in the world today, I come back here to get my fill of pure laugh out loud. Mr. Kermode and Mr. Mayo thank you.

[@TheHitherto]

Absolutely timeless! In 50 years people will still be talking about this :-)

[@GoldenGyroBalls]

Absolutely hysterical stuff right here. I was in tears hearing this.

[@phrankster909]

Thank you for putting this on KZbin. I have rarely heard Simon get so annoyed by Mark. I remember it well.

[@s.wstudioproductions5977]

Fantastic

[@ragnarocks0]

I can hear how the movie has unhinged the poor man.

[@BazTheStoryteller]

Remember the gory death scenes in Day of the Dead? Now imagine it happening to Fred.

[@thejordannoton]

Barry Mitchell Day of the Fred! Too easy...

[@BazTheStoryteller]

Jordan Noton The sequel is called "Fred 2: Night of the Living Fred".

[@Jayfive276]

Barry Mitchell Why? Fred hasnt been relevant in years. His YT channel topped out at 2.5 mil, the guy who played Fred doesnt do him anymore and there's no actual new Fred-related content on the YT channel for some months now. You see, if you wait long enough these things go away. And if you stop drawing attention to them they go away quicker. Remember Crazy Frog? Remember how that went away after like a year? Remember that meme that got on your nerves 2 years ago? See how you dont hear about it any more? Remember Rebecca Black? I trust you see the point im making here

[@jwnj9716]

+Barry Mitchell Damn right

[@RemainIndoorsPainting]

I made the terrible mistake of typing Fred into the KZbin search bar. How the hell did anyone sit through the film version without killing themselves?

[@LASHH9669]

Comparing it the a Serbian film is hysterical

[@warlockofwordschannel7901]

Hah!

[@CrazyVolkov]

It's either a perfect impression of Fred or they were plucking a turkey alive in the studio.

[@SamJamwich1]

Kermode's Fred impression, one of the funniest things I've ever heard!

[@GeekVessel]

I love how it starts relatively sedately and ends up with shrieking and idiocy. Waaaaaay funnier than the movie they're discussing.

[@thesupper9984]

There are 1,080 5 seconds in 90 minutes.

[@Brubser_Jr_Reloaded]

God I'm so glad Fred has been forgotten and we can move on as a species

[@dannypalin9583]

The fact that Mark Kermode is flat out mentioned in the Wikipedia page for The Fred Movie is more hilarious than we can possibly imagine.

[@AwesomeCoasters]

SCREAMING LIKE THIS SCREAMING LIKE THIS SCREAMING LIKE THIS

[@walonsubi]

This is genuinely the funniest thing I've ever heard.

[@paulkellyification]

2:20-2:2:45 funniest thing ever

[@t_ed2521]

Making that my ringtone...

[@accountwithoutrules]

Priceless rant, has to be one of the top ten rants of the year

[@zipstermorris8055]

Greatest review ever.

[@floragosling84]

Best review ever

[@RaviVazirani]

I neeed to see the video for this

[@MattSingh1]

I tweeted this clip to Pixie Lott, who is in the film...I got no response...

[@ZuluRomeo]

Watching this live on the web stream that Friday was one of the funniest moments in Wittertainment history.

[@ggagg123]

Ha haaa, Kermode the legend!

[@hanshotfirst1138]

Poor, poor, poor Simon.

[@TheThing88]

Personally, I think the reviews are all the more funnier for having Simon Mayo as the straight man. It's like Kermode's his embarrassing, hyperactive little brother who he has to try and keep under control - besides, they're obviously just kidding around, check out Kermode's little giggle right at the end, before Mayo tells him he's lost his Mic rights. Chill the heck out, mate.

[@yeetboi9817]

At one point Mark stops doing an impression and just descends into insanity

[@ZuluRomeo]

@Motor42CD I don't remember seeing his face - the camera was focused on the gurning Kermode, and I think there was one shot of an empty seat where Simon was supposed to sit.

[@Kevon420]

This film and review are incredible.

[@CPCGamer]

"Thirteen to Seven year olds" Paging Doctor Freud, Paging doctor Sigmund Freud.

[@Slothspeare]

Thanks for uploading this! I just heard this review on the iplayer and I thought it was another piece of Kermodian brilliance!! xD Subscribed!! ;-)

[@aseriesofshorts7099]

Some say his cries summon Cthulhu himself.

[@thekingofoldskool2]

It still amazes me Lionsgate UK released this in cinemas in the UK in December 2010. On the posters it said ''The KZbin Phenomenon in his First Movie''. At the time I didn't knew who he was. I think because a British Pop Star was in it - it came to the cinema over here. In American it was shown on Nickelodeon.

[@kidkunjer]

that was the funniest review evar. when he was "blublablabblab aaaaaarrrgh!" lol

[@ZuluRomeo]

@Tbass17 and guest-directed by Chris Columbus

[@exodiasmith7276]

I guess that's the end of Mr Kermode. He's lost his broadcasting rights. Well-it's been a good run.

[@zopigmincraft]

My Ears popped

[@redfox7497]

Oh my god Simon!!! If they were married I believed Simon would have divorced him that moment! 😂

[@pionelpessi707]

He literally goes “AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!”

[@stevieh9860]

This is just one of his best ever! Reduces me to helpless levels of laughter every time. Just inspired. It’s moments like this that just make you happy the BBC exist . Just one thing though.......is there any record of the review referred to, where he goes off after 11 seconds? I would love to hear that.

[@bertfromseasamestreet]

This video is so good :)

[@chungusbooper]

So *that* was Willem Dafoe as a child.

[@raisedonpopcornwithgrant9670]

try listening at 2x it will make your night

[@ZuluRomeo]

Literally. Literally. Literally.

[@Jimmyduudah]

Classic - one of his best rants.

[@blokey8]

@TheThing88 I always thought it was more of a sibling thing than a married couple. Simon has a brilliant line in exasperation.

[@martinemesguitar]

Crying with laughter...

[@ironcaptain769]

Wow that is the funniest review ever! LOL Kermode's the best.

[@jd899]

The best rant of the year

[@fartytowels8409]

3:34 until the end of the review, is what I imagine exceeding the speed of light feels like.

[@dancooperfication]

Listening to this video, a turkey being raped by a rhinoceros comes to mind.

[@gerardsweeney9063]

I need to clear up some coffee now, thanks.

[@dancooperfication]

I had to clear up my bloomers thanks to Kermode's horrifying screaming

[@TranceSuperWave]

WOOAAHH!

[@ellbo2]

@Tbass17 and Danny Dyer as Father Karras.

[@ursamajor5234]

When people do stuff like this and then tell me I dropped on my head (which I once did) then there's a problem with them

[@SDCGI]

i’m laughing so hard 😭😭

[@loonylaura85]

Poor Simon! 😉

[@karlkarlos3545]

+Laura Cox He deserved it for his constantly interrupting.

[@badhead]

@StarbPuss it is already upload on the video podcast

[@littlemouse007]

Just download the latest podcast on the FiveLive website.

[@DanCookMovieReviews]

@LH270677 and Danny Dyer as Merrin

[@buzzytrombone4353]

I hated this film without even watching because I thought it would suck balls, especially from people saying it was like the end of the world (Yes I was a dumb kid to listen to a bunch of 30 year old adults with neckbeards and no linx). But after watching it multiple times over lockdown, I fucking love it. For anyone who doesn't know who the Fred character is, Fred was created by Lucas Cruikshank when KZbin first started out, he was characterised as a six year old boy who had a warped negative view of the world around him hating everything despite having high energy and being excited like a little kid, this came from him being emotionally damaged at an early age, being influenced by his mother who was an alcoholic stripper, leading to the kids in the neighbourhood, Kevin and Judy to laugh at his shit expense, despite Fred having a crush on Judy. The movie presumably takes place in the real world, amplifying that warped world view and making Fred be a teenager with mild schizophrenia and stalker behaviours, mostly likely brought on by the fact that he was neglected at the age of six by his own mother who was "working the corners". I think the problem with the film was that it was targeted for kids instead of an adult audience, which would've saved the film considering that there's a ton of dark undertones in there that reference the early days of Fred from 2007 to 2008. And had that been the case it would've been really funny to see a deeper side of the spectrum of Fred's schizophrenia, where the amount of bullying from his warped view of the world in 2008 would've made him not grow up mentally and he'd be forever stuck in this delusion that Judy is his "girlfriend". Basically the Joker but a black comedy.

[@bebily1]

Hahaha! Love them!!

[@lrrroftheplanetomicronpersei8]

Fred was the first KZbin channel to hit 1 million subscribers?? What??

[@brogin]

If that movie is anything like Mark Kermode's imitation it's probably the funniest movie ever.

[@bertfromseasamestreet]

Fred The Movie is a classic

[@benogidan]

2018 this review is amazing. Why is there a cartoon chicken stuck in the studio?

[@SuperAdamMan64]

The best thing about this is how annoyed Simon gets. First Class!

[@Acarlin1887]

the last 30 seconds of this review are like the hell visions from event horizon

[@JamesMC04]

So…Fred sounds like a demented chipmunk.

[@forizzer69]

Made me laugh SO hard.