Tipping in America - We Might Be Drunk (w/ Daniel Sloss)

#comedy #standup #marknormand #danielsloss #wmbd #sammorril #tipping
‪@WeMightBeDrunkPod‬ ‪@WeMightBeDrunkClips‬
marknormandcomedy.com/
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[@dez1448]

British guy: Stabbing > Shooting

[@timw7784]

😂 True but I feel he has a point.

[@erdemkilic60]

Bad guys almost always use cheap rounds not home defense rounds. So an FMJ goes right through you can get shot and still fight and have a higher chance of survival than getting stabbed as well. I'd rather get shot.

[@dwells3536]

@@erdemkilic60Lol first off it’s called a hollow point and not a “home defense round.” Second it’s all about shot placement. If you get shot in leg through your femoral artery by either type of bullet your going to bleed out in a minute. Sure hollow points are more effective, but both are equally dangerous. Also there was a study that looked at all injury admissions to a Seattle hospital over a six year period. The mortality rate for gunshot wounds was 22% while that for stab wounds was 4%. Even among patients that survived, gunshot wounds were more serious. the mean cost of treatment for these patients was more than twice that for stab wounds. Would you still rather get shot than stabbed?

[@erdemkilic60]

@@dwells3536 The study is done in a state where people don't stab people to death on regular basis. Lol Your talking about placement they couldn't most these gang bangers can't hit a target 10 feet in front on them. You know why I said home defense rounds and FMJ everyone knows FMJs are. People kill robbers because they had FMJs and it didn't do shit that's my point Mr. First Off

[@erdemkilic60]

@@dwells3536 First off you think that means something you're a sheep. BAA BAA

[@CreamerOfTheDairySquad]

"Tipping in america" "We went shooting and it was scary"

[@braydengaune2511]

They might be drunk

[@J_L_A]

I've been shooting since I was 6 years old and my granddaughter started at 5. She hadn't ever flinched either☺️

[@karsteinvolle]

Hahaha, not a word about tipping.

[@Pantallideth94]

He might be drunk

[@lukemoskowitz4814]

*looks through comments to see if anyone else noticed*

[@tylerelefterion5606]

Can't put anything about guns/shootings in title or the video gets shadow banned and nobody sees it

[@braydengaune2511]

@@Pantallideth94 fuck I just relied this to someone else before seeing yours 😂

[@finn4435]

Swap tipping with shooting, and it makes sense

[@stevenglendale5707]

Never have I heard a gun debate have the word "fair" come from both sides so much.

[@dystopiaisutopia]

Anybody from the UK doesn't have the right to talk about guns

[@Ndnxnsnsn]

@@dystopiaisutopia not even if they own firearms ?

[@timw7784]

Meaning you can get killed so easily at any time from a long distance from someone with no experience as opposed to a knife where you need more skill and have to get up close. C’mon now.

[@vinyvinycocopuffpassittome5051]

@@timw7784 lol c’mon now shooting isn’t the simple. Even if it was, defending myself should be that simple.

[@makslargu5799]

@@dystopiaisutopia why? Because each time they had a mass shooting their government responded by introducing firearms legislation?

[@Fruitcake69]

what a little boy

[@ShouVertica]

Don't let them know about the arrows and stones

[@wren4077]

Hey if someone can shoot an arrow at me from across a hall, they earned it. Shit takes more skill than pointing and firing a gun.

[@nikkoa.3639]

Both take more effort to fuckin kill, that's for sure. The muscle you'd need to shoot an arrow accurately is absurd

[@austingoyne3039]

Funny but yeah not the same

[@2473DG]

By the time you load up your second arrow you already have 6 holes in your chest

[@richpleh8695]

Not really equal but good try

[@RoaringPhilosopher]

That Swardson bit! “I go through life without getting stabbed, I win!” what a classic

[@davefisher544]

Saying that you can be shot from across the street and that's unfair made me think that being a Scotsman, Sloss thinks if someone came at him with a knife he'd give them a run for their money 🤣

[@fishingwithleaches]

He claims within minutes he was able to shoot accurately which is how you know he's lying 😂

[@mattw6705]

Getting stabbed is much worse that getting shot. Guy's full of crap.

[@eliyarrows2456]

I mean not really just cause you couldn’t doesn’t mean it’s impossible 😂

[@fishingwithleaches]

@@eliyarrows2456 If you have any experience with firearms you'd know he embellishing the story by alot

[@10dollarsteakneggs86]

I don’t think he means he was shooting dimes. He’s from the uk and prolly just means he hit the inner rings of the target a few times

[@thebenevolentsun6575]

​@@fishingwithleaches He probably means accurate enough to hit a human across the street. Accurate enough to be effective.

[@patricklindsay72]

A bunch of liberals talking about guns lol

[@DooberD33]

I can tell homie don’t know guns he said “I fired guns”

[@Gelusss]

yea and “it was the most terrifying thing” 😭

[@AlexH4774]

two guys competing for the most American response right here 👆

[@kwonone1540]

@@AlexH4774 hahaha I was about to say is that a bad thing not knowing guns😂 these guys think it’s a staple in life

[@aaroncousins4750]

Oh my god! You showed him!! He will never disrespect americans like that again!!

[@steve9618]

@@aaroncousins4750 Relax, snowflake.

[@vcall6121]

Swardson bit was hilarious, “ I just wanna go my whole life and not be stabbed, being stabbed is awful cause you’re there like the whole time.. oh nooo😱 it’s coming back…!!!” Even tho I put quote this is not a direct quote , he’s obviously much funnier.

[@solodolotrevino]

I always think about that bit when someone brings up that question.

[@yoeyyoey8937]

This guy solved violent crime: just go back to rapier duels because it’s fair

[@ope.-817]

The point of a gun is to make fights unfair

[@alimo4610]

Naw man I want my rapist to have a fair fight😂

[@NevartRennug]

Gets shot "Well that's not fair man"

[@KevinSmile]

Bro gave the jokers answer for why you should use knives

[@thenickhood1592]

Guns aren't supposed to be honest or fair. The whole point of a gun is that it isn't fair. A woman shouldn't have a fair fight against her potential rapist she should have a tool that will give her the best chance for survival

[@garethkalum8297]

Exactly, spot on.

[@alexmelillo1247]

“Was it you that did the shooting?” I spit out my coffee.

[@17Kenzaki]

BRUHHHH MY 2 IDOLS ARE TOGETHER IN ONE ROOMMM

[@studieslessonstheoryetc141]

That Swardson bit is a classic

[@HowieRaps]

That wittiness at the beginning! These guys should do this regularly!! I LOVE when someone can improv back to a nonsense joke like "oh that was you?"

[@ashlynx1]

Oh wow love Daniel Sloss

[@STANLEY2BRICKS]

When did Macaulay Culkin start sounding so goddamn proper

[@lout9231]

These two together is incredible

[@stee1curtain341]

Damn, he was accurate his first time shooting a pistol? He must’ve been born to shoot

[@johncrowley3322]

Someone can bring a knife to a fist fight that's unfair

[@eliyarrows2456]

Yeah but then it comes down to who can run the fastest. If I guy pulls a gun on you your only hope is that you also have a gun on you 😂

[@ruyijingubang582]

Omfg my two comedic worlds collided

[@mcmc77658]

"out a hotel?"

[@killertaco26]

Daniel Sloss is hilarious! I used to love any time he'd come on Conan's late night show

[@MaxIronsThird]

Sloss is one of my favorite comedians

[@sastrinidis]

Stabbing is like they're fckin you but they are making their own holes

[@michaelchama5639]

what!!!!!😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@TehEzie]

"that's unfair" ever heard of force multiplier

[@miketrujillo3677]

My hero Daniel Sloss holy shit I'm so glad to see him with mark

[@andrewlaco1776]

No wonder Britain lost.

[@miketrujillo3677]

Dude I support the 2nd, I'm from Texas, but judging from all 3 things I've seen from you it seems like you only have one note brother

[@pamoweiberezi5315]

Did they though? They may have lost battle but they won the war. The British empire got to control and influence majority of the world, that's a huge win

[@tdayz9144]

Yeah a 2v1 whilst the French were bailing you out from Britain fighting on boats away from home

[@dystopiaisutopia]

​@@tdayz9144 lol sure buddy. If you think your country is so tough won't you try to invade United States of America again right now.

[@Vulcan23]

This has nothing to do with tipping 😂

[@justinperlow9104]

Thanks Sam for bringing up Nick swardsons joke...real og moment right there!

[@christianrios6295]

“It is unfair”

[@gorddangit8463]

Most level headed gun debate ever and it was had by a couple of psychos lol

[@chewbaccadude4815]

😂 I’ve just been shot that’s so unfair

[@southernstar4353]

Hearing brits cope about their lack of rights never ceases to make me laugh

[@tdayz9144]

Lack of rights? Some Americans are so mind warped and deluded, they would rather have “rights” than air to breathe

[@southernstar4353]

@TdayZ sure guy, are you going to come take my air? Oh no you wont, you just want daddy government to do everything for you. When you get older you will realize why people put "rights" above all.

[@dystopiaisutopia]

​@@tdayz9144 some countries like the United States of America respect god-given rights. And other countries like yours do not respect any god-given rights. Understand?

[@tdayz9144]

@@dystopiaisutopia yeah im sure the magic man in the sky specifically said you should all have guns and commit daily massacres. maybe i should consult Santa about how we should get more "free"

[@eliyarrows2456]

If a guy pulls a knife on you it comes down to who’s the fastest runner. But if a guy pulls a gun on you it comes down to who has the best gun

[@thenickhood1592]

No, it mostly comes down to who's trained more with their firearm.

[@10dollarsteakneggs86]

Probably just who’s faster while still being accurate

[@DooberD33]

OUT OF A HOTEL!😂😂😂

[@eky]

Yea tipping is ridiculous in 2023 i agree ha ha

[@dystopiaisutopia]

Federal government needs to step up and force employers to pay servers more than the current $2.15hr. That itself is a crime. I don't tip because it's not my job to subsidize a poorly structured pay scale.

[@zekeyeager1458]

Clearly these boys haven’t seen “ISIS Slaughterhouse”. They’re so innocent 🥹

[@JohnDoe-vc5qb]

Of course Daniel Sloss is friends with Mark Normand lmao

[@gewishworm4724]

Unfair is kinda the point, you don't make a gun with the design philosophy of "Let's make a gun that sometimes jams on purpose just so the person getting shot might not get hit, you know, to be fair."

[@toastyy1455]

Wow, deepcut on Sam mentioning the Swardson bit lol. Forgot about that one

[@nohabloemojislosiento4930]

I'd go for being shot because people who are shot say things like "I thought a car had hit me and knocked me down," and "it felt hot," and "then I noticed blood a second later." But people who are stabbed say you can just feel the whole thing the entire time. You can feel the foreign object going in and out or sticking in a bone.

[@a.N.....]

I'm glad all it takes is a finger to pull a trigger. Gives me more freedom with my other fingers

[@mwara2444]

Oh my god. I thought that was Jamie Oliver at first.

[@CZProductions]

I worked in forensic chemistry for a bit and I would take being shot over stabbed every day of the week. Stabbings were always so much more brutal and prolonged then shootings.

[@Kino_pup]

That’s wild to me..he’s just so not used to guns. Being scared of them is really bad when you around them.. Your gonna make everyone feel real uneasy. You are also way way way more likely to fuck something up if your scared..just respect it.. don’t be scared dude. There are lots and lots of way to kill someone with an incredibly small action like a trigger pull. I don’t understand how we are allowed to just look over 1000ft sheer cliff with absolutely no guard rails.. so many places don’t have guard rails!!!! I’m sure that guard rails would prevent so many deaths or injuries around cliffs

[@DrVonNostrand]

Anyone else search for the Swardson bit on stabbing

[@claythelin4346]

Fun fact the rate of stabbing a in the UK is much higher than the rate of gun violence in the US per capita (calculated that way cause the US is like 9 times the size of the UK)

[@skeemarty]

Ahahaha comedy

[@nitishmamadgi7035]

I liked the part where they mentioned tipping.

[@sethfeldpausch4337]

I dunno, I think it should be pretty easy for a woman to kill a dude that's trying to assault her. Just my opinion though 😂 when someone is being assaulted, I don't think they care that they are "honest" I think they just want to stop the threat and GTF outta there!

[@brianbiddle7590]

Anit gunners never look at it that way because their mindset is to take and force not defend and protect.

[@jigglypuff3311]

fr tho, like any man that doesn't think people should have guns must not care at all about the women in his life😬

[@kirkpurdy1995]

@@brianbiddle7590 Did he say he was anti gun?

[@brianbiddle7590]

@@kirkpurdy1995 he didn't have to.

[@genericusername8337]

Yeah, but he seemed to say in general, it shouldn't be that easy to kill people. It seems like it was coming from a place of ease-of-access to lethal means, that the barriers to that should be higher. Pulling a trigger is easier than walking up to someone and stabbing them, physically, psychologically, in every way. I don't have a strong opinion on this myself, I'm just saying, it's an understandable ethical angle to this, among many others.

[@iancanada6875]

Tell my 5’4 110 lb sister that she needs a more difficult way to kill someone trying to kidnap her.

[@milesgreenwood5036]

Tell your sister she's not going to get kidnapped

[@crackconsumer2913]

@@milesgreenwood5036 damn y’all just be accepting your fates lol very brave and admirable couldn’t be my family though

[@handlesaretoopersonal]

I think you're gonna have to do it for him

[@johnellis828]

Triggered!

[@milesgreenwood5036]

@@crackconsumer2913 damn you just be making stuff up

[@m4vr1ck]

that the whole point of the gun is to have an unfair fight

[@Y2ANJ]

Damn, this rivals the South Park aristocrats

[@kiyosenl.3889]

I mean if ive got someone trying to shoot or stab me id rather be able to shoot them then have to stab them lol

[@JasonGrey23]

😂😂

[@fractallusion7121]

I am confused by the title of this short lol

[@b51a5h]

Nice shirt Sam! Get Greg Stone on the pod!

[@charlesbennet9233]

I know Marks is joking but a lot of stabbings are in the back or leg so it's more like a cold unsolicited slap on the ass. Expect it's your spleen and you are not bleeding out now.

[@redonk1740]

That's the great thing about firearms. You don't have to wait until somebody is knife deep in your digestive tract to defend yourself. Firearms level the playing field. A dwarf with a gun can adequately defend themselves against a 7 foot tall bodybuilder.

[@fordrollhaus9086]

But no one can adequately defend themselves against anyone with a gun, so guns end up being much more dangerous in the hands of a criminal

[@Ry_TSG]

We could also just do things that reduce crime in the first place, like alleviating poverty

[@LogicalCanadian]

​@@fordrollhaus9086 Have you ever fired a handgun? Have you ever fired a handgun in a stressful situation? If not, then I challenge you to go to a shooting range, and hit a human target at 7 yards. You will see that it is not as easy as you think it is.

[@LogicalCanadian]

​@@Ry_TSG How many trillions have been spent and things are worse than ever. We need different approaches that have responsibility lay with the individual and their local community. As soon as we clean up our own backyard, we will see that change is contagious.

[@Ry_TSG]

@@LogicalCanadian Those trillions were spent on programs designed to do hardly anything at all, or are outdated. We need to start using solutions at all levels that are actually shown to work. For instance, reforming our criminal justice system to focus on rehabilitating people to be functioning members of society rather than turning people into hardened criminals for stealing a car or doing drugs. Speaking of drugs, we need to take the Portugal approach to ending drug abuse: stop jailing people for doing drugs, and start giving them free rehab and treatment. And to get that treatment? We need a universal healthcare system that will both reduce the personal cost of healthcare, and will reduce the burden on the country as a whole. There is no reason we should be spending 16.8% of our GDP on unaffordable healthcare while Germany spends 11.7% and gets better healthcare for almost free. Something else that Germany does that we don't? Strong labor rights. We should be promoting unions so that workers can bargain and raise their own wages (ending right to work laws would help with this). We should be working hard to end wage theft, which costs Americans $15 billion annually and is more than every other type of theft put together. And given that more than half of American workers earn minimum wage (more than 89% of whom are over the age of 20), raising the minimum wage to a minimum of $15 or more would have tremendous impacts for tens of millions of people. On a local level, we should be supporting small businesses. It would be great to lower sales taxes too, as sales tax has the greatest impact on poor people. And given that a Harvard study has shown access to public transportation to be one of the most important factors in being able to lift oneself out of poverty, we definitely need to invest in better transit. Sorry for the rant, but it really pisses me off to see not only that none of the above things are really being done, but that the intentional ineptness of the government for so long has turned people against the idea of actually improving the government and using it to solve problems.

[@Frank7489]

It’s true if you take someone who’s never shot before and teach them how to align the sights properly, it’s common for them to be right on target first shot. But then, after they feel the recoil they’ll start anticipating it and start pulling shots all over the place and flinching and what not

[@JIYkp]

Guns are the great equalizer

[@StaccatoRedFox]

Wow, how are so many ppl oblivious to firearms. “I’ve shot guns” sounds like it’s so foreign to him, as I lay next to my Staccato.

[@tdayz9144]

It is foreign to him because most countries that aren’t war torn 3rd world anarchies and America don’t have guns roaming the streets

[@10dollarsteakneggs86]

Bc most people in most western countries don’t have a lot of guns. Most people go their whole lives without ever seeing a gun not in the hands of a cop or the military. That’s why those people in Japan when the former prime minister or whatever got shot didn’t immediately run away, it didn’t even register that the sound could’ve been a gun

[@garethkalum8297]

​@@tdayz9144 no, actually most countries do let you own firearms. Learn some geography.

[@garethkalum8297]

​@@10dollarsteakneggs86 no. Again. Learn some reality outside of your tiny slice of the world.

[@tdayz9144]

@@garethkalum8297 theres a differnce between developed countries allowing certain shotguns and non "assault weapons" for hunting. But no other country has civilians walking around with rifles to "defend themselves"

[@claybramble8007]

Do you think these three ever wondered how America was created?

[@williycoyote4828]

Singing a pop song with a country accent Does not make it country music

[@someblaqguy]

It does, at least that's what passes as "country music" to most peole nowadays.

[@rockerpirate]

Yeah it ain’t no bob wayne, honky tonk hustlas, hellbound glory, so on.

[@williycoyote4828]

@@someblaqguy it does not make it country music. Hank Williams the third 3 says it way better than I can.

[@someblaqguy]

@@williycoyote4828 I was being sarcastic, I'm not being literal. I agree with you

[@therer15letters33]

Wait till they figure out that sound and lasers are also dangerous 😂

[@Ry_TSG]

Sound and lasers also aren’t made to kill you

[@wren4077]

​@@Ry_TSGyou're arguing against American logic. Man will say "rocks are dangerous too. What are we gonna do? Ban rocks now?????"

[@garethkalum8297]

​@@Ry_TSG yes they are.

[@garethkalum8297]

​@@Ry_TSG you do realise we have weapons based on sound and light? It's literally a war crime to use lasers offensively.

[@Ry_TSG]

@@garethkalum8297 Do you own a home defense laser? Do you own a speaker that is designed to be so loud that it makes my head explode? Sound is a natural thing that you can't ban, and constructing a laser powerful enough to kill someone is very difficult and expensive, not to mention impractical. Do you not see how absurd it is to compare everyday things like cars or sound to firearms that are specifically designed to kill people and are available at a massive scale?

[@GlorifiedGremlin]

No mark, no that was the federal agents in the helicopters

[@lordfordification]

I love taking my European friends to the ranch. They even served in the military across the pond and they like the freedom of firepower in America.

[@johnpappa8073]

I'm more of a Chicago person than a London person if ya know what I mean

[@jaredb6934]

It's unfair for the 24 year old woman being attacked by a 225 lb thug..... unless she's armed, then it's absolutely fair that she can protect herself with the gentle squeeze of a finger. It's all about perspective and that dude is looking at it the wrong way.

[@SmugAmerican]

What's a thug?

[@orlog3343]

@@SmugAmerican blacks

[@SmugAmerican]

@@orlog3343 Ah I see, of course.

[@dystopiaisutopia]

​@@SmugAmerican anybody dangerous

[@kgdahbf909]

But that works the other way around to. What if the thug has a gun?

[@Po7ent]

Spoken like a true 🐑 Brit

[@owenmurz]

🫥

[@AndyCutright]

I love the Brit's surprise gun's are easy to use. It's just one "button." Point and shoot. What's astonishing about that? Does he think all those soldiers and cops are super bright?

[@goatclips2222]

The thing is stabbing only really occur with idiots in that lifestyle and mostly in london. There is a massive problem. Not in my city anyway. But the thing with America if I lived there knowing a normal guy. On the outside anyway can just get the most outrageous guns and kill like 20 people in minutes is terrifying ngl. If you actually work and aren’t some idiot on the streets doing all sorts then you aren’t gonna see a knife pointed at you but in America there’s still innocents just getting shot up like that. Yiu defo shouldn’t ban them but only people who actually have stuff to defend like a family or idk land shld be able to have high powered things. It would give these scummy school shooters and mass shooters less confidence if they only had like hunting rifles or pistols atleast

[@wtp7631]

Wow, brits just can't break that subjugated mindset

[@lizdino9375]

Just want to congratulate you on not making any spelling errors! It must be hard to type with your fat american fingers.

[@wtp7631]

@Lizdino you were searching for an insult, and that's what you came up with? Are you 8? Go blow king sausage fingers, then come back when you're grown up.

[@deadtome44]

Just cause you shoot guns as a hobby doesn’t make you any more free. If the government wants you dead or silenced it’ll happen, no matter what you’re packing.

[@horstvazinksi3408]

Yeah, not gonna take a British guy's idea on guns... Kinda the whole point in these parts

[@yerrrrrrr3413]

I can pretty much guarantee that Daniel Sloss was not accurate his first shooting a pistol.

[@bravingbrivatebrian]

If you think that's bad wait until you hear about Nagasaki and Hiroshima

[@soledieairvideos5974]

All the gun nerds in this comment section are so weird

[@dystopiaisutopia]

All the gun haters are so weird

[@garethkalum8297]

People scared of objects are wierd.

[@310sbell]

Never thought shooting a gun was scary. I wonder where these ppl come from

[@squiffedallday]

“I was accurate” BULL SHIT

[@Chief244]

Lol look at me I have so much compassion

[@prodpreston]

50 cent…

[@MakeLoveNotWar687]

I’m not going to listen to people that banned the crossbow in war

[@Jerry-gs4tc]

"I'd rather be shot than stabbed though because stabbing is repeated" Yeah it's a good fucking thing all guns only hold one bullet

[@ChrisShockz]

Getting stabbed hurts waaaay more than getting shot.

[@garethkalum8297]

Experienced?

[@Somethirdthing]

3 pansies, good comedy tho

[@D34D22]

Bruh it ain’t about fair it’s about protecting yourself

[@kagehughart1498]

This dude doesn’t know a thing about what he’s talking about

[@connorcolumbia5398]

I’d rather be shot than stabbed, at least it might just zip right through some meaty part. The stabbing always happens to your stomach and chest so you’re either going to bleed out terribly or shit into a bag for the rest of your life.

[@dystopiaisutopia]

True. If somebody tries to stab me they're getting shot.

[@akbop3749]

Depends have u ever seen the exit wound on someone who was shot? I think I'd take being stabbed. And I love guns. But I would not ever want to be on the receiving end of my .270

[@connorcolumbia5398]

@@akbop3749 most of the time you get shot it’s going to be with a 9mm or maybe .45 ACP. Any deer hunting round would completely fuck you up obviously. I wouldn’t want to get shot by my M1 Garand or Gewehr 98. I can’t believe those crazy fucks used to shoot each other with those things.

[@nickgavis0305]

lol id rather get shot than stabbed if that’s the way I’m gonna go out. Most likely it’s gonna be quicker no matter what lmao

[@fppro1679]

Jesus Christ! Talk about being afraid of everything!

[@curtisbarkes6271]

Biased ignorance....

[@kennethkline7702]

Anyone who hates country music is ignorant of the lyrics of 95% of country songs.

[@seandamon6056]

Country songs are about guns, beer, sex, and America

[@jeffreywilson9896]

95% of country music today sucks, just like 95% of the rest of pop music. Today's radio play country SUCKs. There is some good stuff out there still, but few and far between.

[@jeffreywilson9896]

For every Chris Stapleton out there, there are 10 Florida Georgia Lines.

[@RedBernie]

Female country I can stand. I can’t get past a dude with a country accent singing anything. It will always sound funny to me

[@ghostamster1414]

If you're looking for good lyrics country is the wrong genre