Marriage and the Law

On episode 5 of After Dark with Kayise we talk Marriage and the Law. Marriage is one of the things that many desire, but what difficulties does it sometimes bring and what does the law say? We chat to Sihle Seleke who shares her story of being married twice, being widowed twice and how that affected her relationship with her in-laws and her healing journey thereof. We also speak to Tebello Motshwane, an attorney and founder of Sister-in-Law about the understanding of marriage laws and what legal authority one holds should a spouse die.

[@xoliswa_m328]

This series is underrated.... deserves a slot in Tv 😭😭

[@afterdarkwithkayise1305]

Thank you so much. It is being seen by people who need to see it. I hope it brings healing and information to people all over the world.

[@tinytomas3773]

Couldn't agree more it's the things we go through also helps to prepare one for the unknown. Bless u Kayise & your guests we love u how u are un apologetic about the most painful things we don't want to talk about as families

[@lesegorammego6666]

I totally agree with you right there Xoliswa_M.

[@lulekangqulunga8326]

I agree👍

[@zibuyilemaduna9522]

I agree so much, this story is so shocking.

[@Thandi899]

Hi Kayise. Thank you for a wonderful program. Please allow your guests to share their story, it’s healing for them too. From my perspective Sihle didn’t even get a chance to say anything, it seems you wanted headlines from her pain. I don’t think you intend to, but it’s coming off that way. Which is worrying for me as a viewer. If you give them the platform, don’t take their voice away in the process. If time is the problem, please consider revisiting your strategy. Thank you again for your wonderful work. Concerned viewer.

[@ayabulelamahleza]

Props to Sihle, she’s very strong. I hope those two children will learn what the truth is & they will have a lovely relationship in the end.

[@afterdarkwithkayise1305]

Amen!

[@kwanelefoundation5032]

A million thanx my dear.... Sihle

[@beckyfrancis481]

The quality of your production is A+. Your gift will surely make room for you. You are destined for more. Thank you for using your gift and adding richness to KZbin.

[@thembinxitywa9754]

The content that I signed up for 🙌. It pains me to see how much families put wives through. And for what? Money that doesn’t even belong to them. When will it stop? Strength to everyone who might be experiencing the same thing 💕.

[@lebo_moloi]

This episode needed to be longer 😭 so informative. Bigs up to Sihle for standing her ground and never allowing the families to bully her

[@afterdarkwithkayise1305]

Thank you Lebo for watching. I appreciate it. I also did a live with Sihle in June. You may find it on my IG page :)

[@mfundokazintoyanto2098]

Ohw Kayise this need to be on National TV hle.. khawuzame torho.. tho whole world need to this, for i believe there are people abazophila through what you doing dear

[@afterdarkwithkayise1305]

Thank you so much for the love. You can make sure the world knows about it by sharing episodes and links to the KZbin channel. It being online means anyone, anywhere and at anytime can access it and watch it.

[@fanimsoki3148]

I agree with you... Let it be actioned

[@anelissabrown2424]

I aspire to have Sihle's confidence and strength..She is an inspiration❤❤ I loved this episode💖💖

[@MinnieChef]

Marriage is so deep yeeer, one moment it's about just the two then later it's the whole world in between the union. Thank you Kayise and Sihle, I'm not married yet but I want to get married one day. Your testimonies just opened my eyes for things to look out before hand and be discussed and put into paper before it's too late.

[@afterdarkwithkayise1305]

Amen dear. I hope and pray that when the times comes for you to tie the knot, you won't forget this conversation. May God bless you

[@lesedikonyana2309]

Very educational... it’s important to know what the law says with regards to marriage

[@afterdarkwithkayise1305]

Indeed sis!! Indeed!!

[@ntandomthembu257]

I've learned a lot today. We really need to know these things before we commit to marriage

[@elizabethletsoso2558]

True dear

[@nethelsimelane4032]

😭😭😭😭This is too emotional , God some women are stronger than I thought 💔💔💔

[@nininicky6610]

I know what you are talking about ,I have been there

[@amohelangsefume4764]

iyo...Thank you Kayise, we can never be more grateful. your content is a gold mine and it deserves broader airing. Amen

[@MathipaChepape]

Kayise you are doing a great job This is what we need to hear and educated about

[@manthobamamabolo6976]

This deserves a slot in Tv😭😭😭I agree Xoliswa

[@letlhogonolotlhowe8793]

I only saw this episode today and I have say that I'm impressed with the content of the episode and how everything is structured. These are some of the lessons that we have to really take note of as women not only to protect ourselves but also our children. Very informative episode indeed.

[@virtualassistant8959]

Heartbreaking story, I wish you had split Sihle’s story and Tebello. They both had so much to share. All the same, thanks Kayise for having these conversations.

[@afterdarkwithkayise1305]

Thank you very much for watching and for all the support. I appreciate it in ways you can never begin to imagine.

[@elizabethletsoso2558]

Virtual Assistant so true hun

[@mpumitwala2614]

I love how she said 'my kids'

[@lindokuhlenjoko6615]

I have heard her story many times but tjo every time when I listen to her story I 😢 😢. You women are strong 🙏🙏🙏

[@nonimhlahlo8091]

Thank you very much Kayise for bringing up things we go through and we unaware of the legal issues. We really appreciate this channel

[@afterdarkwithkayise1305]

Thank you

[@philisamanimani4424]

Todays topic was a very interesting one.... Ndimothulela umnqwazi uSihle! I took/learned something from Sihles's story. Kayise ndiyabulela ngokundixhobisa kwakho

[@afterdarkwithkayise1305]

Thank you very much for watching :)

[@keneiloemyoli]

This is such an important topic. Wives are told from the very beginning when they get married that they are in it for the money. So it might happen that one will get blamed and get stripped of assets in future.

[@rakgadim.mohlala1324]

This comes at a time where we see Rakgadi embarrassing her brothers memory on national tv.

[@yolandamfikili7358]

Lalela👏👏👏

[@MinnieChef]

Eish that woman 😔

[@pinkydlamini9414]

That woman has no wisdom what so ever.

[@sesethusam9623]

How did I miss the notification 💔💔🥺🥺 But atleast sendilapha .. I’ve beeeen waiting for Sihles story after the emotional live we had a few weeks back... SIHLE YOUR STORY GIVES HOPE 🙏🏾

[@madrops2312]

Yoh Kayise u shld hv put an hour fr Sihle. I remember whn u hosted her on IG. Thnks girl

[@afterdarkwithkayise1305]

Thank you for watching and supporting. I always really appreciate it.

[@refilwemaria7544]

We super greatful for sharing light on these Very important matters for the young who still have a lot ahead thank u for preparing us mentally the greatest gift in any frastrating Situation is knowing what to do keep it up Sis Kayise May the Lord create a path in the wilderness and create rivers in the dessert for u Sis...Thank u for your heart and not letting it experience be urs alone bt wiping the tears of many and awakening many because this is reality of life

[@ladybee5407]

Your show needs a slot on TV really you have touched on such important issues .

[@dikhaeni565]

This deserve to be on Tv screen. informational and heals.

[@tshegoboshielo6549]

This was so informative 🙌🏼 definitely the content I signed up for. Keep up the great work you doing, I learned a lot from this episode

[@queennandiey725]

I enjoy this series so much, so educational

[@athiji]

Very informative im not even married and i didn't know most of the stuff discussed here so interesting

[@afterdarkwithkayise1305]

Thank you very much for watching. I am glad that you have been informed and you know what to do.

[@glaciousndhlovu2675]

I wish your shows were longer though 😫😫😫 . . . I still wanted to hear more on Sihle's story

[@nasiphilinda8852]

Love love this show, thank you Kayise❤️!!!!

[@_siyamame]

Thank you so much for this topic. I’ve seen it and I’ve lived it just a couple of months ago where in-laws want to bully you and cut you off your husband’s funeral arrangements and everything else. One of my moms called me to tell that I must wake up because I have the legal right to do whatever when it comes to burying my husband. It’s a looooong story but I get it sis. I’ll be sure to follow sister-in-law I have tons of questions for her.❤️

[@afterdarkwithkayise1305]

I am so sorry that you have gone through this. May you find comfort, healing and your strength in all of this. Follow Tebello, she is really woke and I know she will provide great insights

[@nomzamocabane2060]

yes please, Kayise you are an inspiration

[@kedibonemasuku9545]

Wow Sihle, you are strong, wise and intelligent bravo to you.. woman of stature, continue to raise those kids with love, it was not a mistake you married your husband, God knew you have a big heart and you will are capable.. Thanks Kayise for this platform

[@sandrankrumah7663]

My story is similar maybe one day I can share with you

[@thabiledladla7424]

I loved this episode, thank you for sharing ❤

[@nomthandazoxulu9830]

Missed you so much Kayise. Thank you for this episode, very informative.

[@Miranda-hf5hu]

Sihle is a very strong woman and her voice is everything! Thank guys for sharing your experiences with us. Qinani bafaza!

[@gladyskalimoya7305]

Thanks for this program, am a zamban lost my husband in 2020, but was mistreated by my inlaws.

[@Riri.B24]

I wanted to hear Zihle full stories from start to finish

[@afterdarkwithkayise1305]

Unfortunately time my dear. I however did an IG live with her in June, she speaks a little bit more about her story. You can find it on my IG page @kayise_ngqula

[@Riri.B24]

Will check it out thank you

[@fanimsoki3148]

In some instances the law fails us... Kaise this needs to be a TV show lots of women are undergoing more darkness journeys like these and more and hearing such journeys from other women may heal others who can not talk...

[@lauramdunge5362]

Wonderful and so educational

[@katliwithlove5067]

Sihle is strong, may God continue to be with you 💞

[@elizabethletsoso2558]

Amen Katli

[@Shoni86]

Impressed i loved everything yoh so informative ppl should listen to this

[@heathermbambeni5789]

Wow,thank you Kayise...I've really learned a lot

[@dikeledisharon1244]

Wow Sihle is the strongest woman in the world.. I say she deserves to be with her kids n no one has a right to take them away from her

[@refilwebadubi5664]

You definitely deserve a Tv slot...😭🇧🇼

[@chawadamusvaire941]

Thank you for this channel and especially for this episode. I'm learning so much. Thank you for sharing your journey and those of others so openly. Please can you share your guests youtube channel.

[@khanyisaqueenshandlale9413]

Thank you so much for this. What an eye opener!

[@christinelondoni1652]

Nice one Kayise, you really shortened the stories it would have been nice to hear more from both

[@afterdarkwithkayise1305]

Hi Christine, thank you very much for watching. It is much appreciated. I did a live with Sihle in June and you can find it on my IG page where she also told more about her story. Tebello is a wise and informed attorney and I know she is open to answering questions you may have. You are also able to find her on IG. Thank you once again for supporting and watching :)

[@christinelondoni1652]

@@afterdarkwithkayise1305 thanks so much

[@florencemakota4830]

Wow! Thanks for sharing and I fully relate

[@mazaleniengineeringandproj9607]

Wow what a sad story, unfortunately it's not just a story its reality. I wish though you would have given Sihle more time to tell us what really happened. Wow I am so touched, i cried.

[@elizabethletsoso2558]

I'm so touched too dear

[@lizzymokgotho2748]

We deserve sihle part two story

[@tabbimaepe3867]

It is very evident our society needs to be educated and also the law needs to be more accommodating and support widows

[@GomolemoKobe]

Sis Sihle is such a phenomenal being💕.

[@gracexialuhvs]

Hi Sihle long time ,wow I thought I know this face .Sorry to hear about your pain .God strengthen you .Vuyelwa

[@sumeiyaali5663]

Hi Kayise. Thank you so much, beautiful and very informative content. Like your channel and all your contents I’ve listened to so far. It’s Esethu don’t think you remember me, Olwethu’s cousin from Amalinda. Keep up the great work and May God open doors for you

[@nkhen_c357]

Please give these segments more time. You are cutting them too short

[@lizzymokgotho2748]

I really enjoy you're content hey honestly so insightful

[@mphoserati4630]

💜New subbie. You've won my heart

[@siphokazilunika2329]

Wow!!!! Im so proud of you sisi🙌🏻🙏🏻

[@beejjjj4106]

Wow. Very informative...

[@hazelmafuya5996]

Inwant to sihle to start from the beginning her story sounds interesting

[@mpoimakhetha9345]

Haibo guys this information is important!!!!!!!!

[@cecileliralicious]

Wow wow wow so helpful.

[@sangepiliso7403]

This content Kayise. I feel like my eyes are open and curious to learn more. I'm widowed as well and dating is so confusing! Thinking of getting marr again is a full headache because although my husband died when I was 30 years old, they have not released me from my makoti duties. I want a family and a living husband but njani when I am still married to a dead man.

[@yandiswamtimkulu6507]

Nkosi yam

[@andisani257]

Hi Sisi. If you ready to move and ready to let go do so, do not let your inlaws enslave you in this, I do not believe that is what your husband would have wanted for you. If you have to release yourself, release yourself. I know this may be difficult but if they choose to tie you to "makoti" duties until 20forever what will you do?

[@_siyamame]

That’s very selfish of them. Ask yourself if that’s what your husband would’ve wanted?! Your in-laws don’t own you. Release yourself sis. I’m also widowed and I’m 27 years I have made the decision to release myself from them not because I want to get married but for my peace & sanity for reasons similar to those of Sihle.

[@mathapelomofokeng9782]

Kayise thank you for having Sihle especially after the live IG a few weeks back.Sihle..#StandingOvationToYou.

[@leefortunate5764]

Release yourself sesi aowa

[@musakhumalo5424]

So informative ❤️,thank you

[@Hezzzza]

May we please hear Sihles whole story

[@akhonazintle6792]

Kayise God bless you thats all i can say dear and purify your dreams ❤🌷

[@MrsD_2022]

I guess to be safe sisters. We just shouldn't opt for community of property, even if u have nothing when u guys get married, we will just have to ensure that we work hard to get our own. To avoid the torture and all the drama, where are we going to get the strength to still be fighting with the in laws

[@ntobekomtimkulu239]

Lovely presentation. Keep up the good work. P.S. I haven't seen you since we worked at Vertigo... We should catch up sometime when I'm back in the country ;-)

[@memorymogwera]

Yes bring this to T.V. please

[@elizabethletsoso2558]

I agree with you

[@millicentnkosi]

I love uKayise..she seems like an amazing woman ❤

[@johannaimmanuel5030]

This is so interesting, am not married neither a window but I've learned a lot, at least I can educate someone too.

[@matladitshepiso9644]

you are helpful with ur stories kayise .. big up to you honey

[@NotAllthatGlittersisGold1]

Very informative 💕

[@bathokozile5591]

Thank you ❤

[@bongivelem6037]

yhooo, im not married yet, but i feel your pain, i am sooo sorry.

[@afterdarkwithkayise1305]

Thank you for supporting. I hope when the time comes for you to be married, you will also ensure to protect yourself and your spouse.

[@oagilemaetane5476]

It's honestly sad how much we romanticize a union in the form of a marriage but know very little about it

[@mpumitwala2614]

Shu, I have no words.

[@mclowen1]

You are amazing...

[@timbawangu3038]

OK, I had to rewind, how did Sihle get the message again? 😭😭😭😭😭

[@dianneradebe]

She's strong

[@elizabethletsoso2558]

So touching yooo the in laws guys

[@Justgloryn]

being an african woman is hard.Inlaws why do u do this..........

[@thandiqabela3205]

Lord!

[@jennifergelebe2006]

this is what we want to see on TV, NOT UYAJOLALA, SPHITHIPHITHI. AND OTHER unusual shows.

[@agnessmwachiyaba6088]

Kayise you are pretty ❤. Your complexion is cute

[@frankaatem4120]

Please if I may ask what of a case where you are married and divorce but you both have kids , but at the long run you get married does it mean that you will have to adopt the kids if either of the parents of the kids are still alive?

[@bettynukie8147]

When one divorce and the children are using their father's surname. In a case of my child pass, are the family of thier father or the father bury my child? Just thought of asking this

[@mbalinhlenx4617]

Wow 😪

[@rellieeustance8339]

❤❤

[@buyendala8482]

This segment is way too short!

[@nonhlanhlamakhombothi3719]

This is so touchy it happened to my mom 36 years ago 😭😭

[@afterdarkwithkayise1305]

I am so sorry, I hope you and the family find the healing you need

[@mpoomzadube1429]

Do you know how beautiful you are Kayise

[@elizabethletsoso2558]

She is beautiful indeed 💕💕

[@sindiswasithole4279]

I just dont understand why inlaws have to be so mean, their pretense is incredibly evil, instantly they change as soon as their son passes on...there is so much that widows can learn from the After dark.

[@graciafani8213]

My dear...they change to pythons....to the extent of telling you that his children aren't his

[@pamellamazula4188]

Yhooo hayini guys in laws 🙆‍♀️🙆‍♀️🙆‍♀️🙆‍♀️🙆‍♀️

[@elizabethletsoso2558]

Tjooo in Law's cc are witches 🤞

[@andiswaveronica8770]

Hi Sihle sorry about that your story it's very said kodwa kunento angayzwa kahle your husband passed away una 4 mouth prgnt but wabe sowushada futhi kungekapheli nonyaka eshonile already wawusopholile emoyeni wakho ukuthi uqhubeke nempilo cause I pain yofelwa ihlukile kwamanye .I'm not judging you dear I'm asking honesty

[@xolisilekhuzwayo]

Andiswa Veronica she met her second husband a year after being widowed and they got married 4 months after meeting. yes she had healed.