Marriage does not need love.

[@chrisfrank4267]

After 35yrs of marriage and having raised 3 children --- It would have never worked - without the love God gave us and his steady and present loving hand in our lives

[@lydiapetra1211]

makes sense....if there's no love... there's no motivation to get together....

[@gothicyid]

Love can fade. Marriage is more than love.

[@NEMO-NEMO]

Love is work, work is marriage. They do go together.

[@TEJASWEEVISHNUGODBOLE]

❤

[@damon2771]

There is really not a strong requirement of love in any relationship until you respect the things other person do for you. Its that simple.

[@AliceKluge]

Married for love and still going strong 15 years later.

[@mustardseeds7]

Love along with the SPIRIT of GOD ALMIGHTY , commitment and perseverance are a true blessing indeed!

[@blk5124]

I'm not speaking for all women but every woman I've ever known who has shared details of their personal life . . . women need love. (I think men need love too.) Women are, generally speaking, repulsed at the idea of having a sexual relationship with someone they don't love or don't find attractive. Sex becomes a chore instantly for women who are not in love or don't find their partner attractive. I think there's a lot to be said for marriages based on love and attraction. It isn't all that matters but it is pretty integral. A common worldview is a great underpinning and really most important but to say love doesn't matter and sex doesn't matter. It matters to a lot of us.

[@blk5124]

21 years for me and my hubby. Also married for love, attraction, common worldview, and for sex.

[@DarkCelestialConsciousness]

I c both perspectives tbf but he is saying there should b love in a marriage j that if your feelings change that u shouldn't abandon your partner

[@DarkCelestialConsciousness]

​@@blk5124yes XD

[@megamaze00]

When I married my husband my entire thought process was, “This is exactly the man I want to raise children with.” We were both broke college kids with a dream. 11 years later, and we just welcomed our fourth son into the world. God is so good.

[@liveagaincoachingministry1319]

Did you LOVE something about him?

[@MrNikhilgherwar]

Love and blessings to you both

[@Radianty_Ella]

@@liveagaincoachingministry1319she loved the thought of him being a good father and raising children together. This is our natural biological response as women and always has been. Love can grow from that. Imagine a good man being there for your son, taking your daughter on daddy daughter dates, taking care of you after giving birth. What’s not to love about that? Modern dating has over complicated things that used to be so simple.

[@thandicandy5452]

Amen ❤

[@positivevibe7684]

@megamaze You manifested what you wanted and was open to receive it. Love it 💕

[@EynOdMilevado]

The point of this advice is to reveal the secret that caring for someone else instead of thinking of me me me all the time will make a marriage work. Don’t confuse that with being a doormat. We’re speaking of a state of mind where you distance yourself from selfishness.

[@chrisfrench9257]

Yes. Both husband and wife should share this mindset. This is the key.

[@someoneit]

לצערנו הרבה נשים עושות כך והבעל לא מחזיר באותו מטבע אלא להיפך, מנצל את האישה ומזלזל בה. חשוב לציין שאם לא רואים שזה הדדי, להפסיק לתת לשני ולנסות לטפל בעניין בכל דרך כי זה ממש לא נישואין כפי שהיהדות קובעת.

[@EynOdMilevado]

@@someoneit מסכימה, אבל לא לוותר כל כך מהר על הזוגיות. לפעמים זה לוקח שנים . אם רואים אפילו שיפור קטן כדאי לרחם ולחכות עד שיקבל הדעת שאם אין שלום אין ברכה. התורה אומרת "יותר קל ללמוד את כל הש"ס מאשר לתקן מידה אחת.״ כשמחכים בסבלנות ומרחמים על השני שלא מבין כמה רע הוא עושה לעצמו לא רק לך, ולא כועסים, אז בסוף הוא יתבייש.

[@ainomugishacaroline3765]

your comment needs to be underlined. 😍😍

[@jjjackson5183]

Agreed. It is just that you cannot get that at face value.

[@cdio78]

I would say, marry someone who has already what you're looking for. Avoid changing someone. It will cause you less pain.

[@positivevibe7684]

@cdio ON POINT!!! I agree 💯

[@vijaymamoria]

And why would that someone marry you?

[@cdio78]

@@vijaymamoria because that someone find that I have already what he needs of course. 😂 it seems hard to you to understand

[@positivevibe7684]

@@vijaymamoria Because the feelings and attractions are mutual. They both bring what each other are looking for.

[@vijaymamoria]

@@cdio78 And that perfect condition happens only in your imagination is what seems is hard for you to understand 😂😂😂

[@aglaesaitschenko2349]

speak for yourself. My parents were happily married and nuts about each other for over 70 years. And they got married because they fell in love.

[@deanna.radiant]

This!!! This is what I've seen too!

[@AliceKluge]

100% without love it sounds like a business transaction.

[@Y1836Y]

An exception doesn't make a rule. Wonderful for your parents and your family.

[@Y1836Y]

​ @AliceKluge who said the rabbi said not to have love? It's simply not the reason to marry. Love takes time. Even when you have it can lessen or disappear or not be genuine. It's fickle. You want to base a lifetime on fickle? Go ahead.

[@JACKtheSEXYPIRATE]

@@Y1836Yhe literally said if they are in your life you will love them which is not true at all. Plenty of people in your life you do not love. Having love in marriage is not the exception to the rule. A lot of people today have settled and are unhappy in their life. Who you decide to live with is the most important decision of your life. Your home is sacred. Love is not the ONLY reason to marry, but it is definitely at the top of the list.

[@TheMerFree]

Marry not for lust, but marrying for love is essential, because love is an action, and not necessarily an easy action. Love is sacrifice and putting the needs of another ahead of your own. ❤

[@mmariemarkel7482]

Wise words I wish I had been taught growing up. Oh the heartache and pain I would have been saved from. The man I was going to marry, became enraged from paranoid, unwarranted jealousy and beat me for two hrs to "be sure I knew my place and who was boss" two weeks before the ceremony. I'm entirely thankful it happened BEFORE the wedding rather than after, because I had no clue about that side of him. That was the end. I deserve far more than an abusive, jealous partner for life. I'd rather be alone. One thing more that a lot of people don't understand is that you can be alone and not be lonely. One needs to get comfortable with being alone with themselves IMHO before they are ready to be with their life partner. This makes it so you don't drain the other person looking for validation.

[@blk5124]

So glad you escaped that horrible situation!

[@inlighteningyourlife]

I agree with this advice. Be ok being alone first.

[@Ladollsad]

That’s it! I definitely agreed! Why do I have to feel miserable in a relationship just to pleased someone who’s not even mentally capable? We have a free will,certainly no way, I must feel comfortable on my own skin all the ways.

[@vivhiggins5656]

How right you are and meny,men and some woman are narcissists thats,why meny kids run wild and are being killed,just look at this week,know I love children,and I am happy fore the married couple's that are happy,has meny are not,😢

[@findus8600]

So true 👍

[@Vrodify67]

I married twice for love and ended up heartbroken and divorced. I did not marry for love this time. I love him now but not that crazy, obsessed, intense and jealous love I had before. We are together for 11 years now without any drama. We have a mutual respect and are true partners.

[@laracroft5351]

Which is called friendship

[@faddy24]

​​@@laracroft5351yep 'friendship' with transactional/financial benefits, a legal certificate and enhanced social status. Personally I would never marry for those reasons. Mutual love, emotional support, respect, trust and attraction and if those things are absent then no marriage as far I'm concerned.

[@zn4805]

Caring for someone else comes with love. Loveless marriage is an ugly sight. Marry for love and respect and cherish it forever.

[@Y1836Y]

Who's talking loveless marriage?

[@Y1836Y]

What's an uglier sight? People who married for love and hate each other though stay together for some twisted idea of what G-d wants.

[@zn4805]

@@Y1836Y the man on the video is talking about that and the video is called “Marriage does not need love”. I disagree with that.

[@zn4805]

@@Y1836Y I’ve seen what happens to woman who marry without love and think other feelings will replace it.

[@kv2723]

​@@Y1836Ythose ppl married for the wrong reasons. You MUST be in love, share the same values, be compatible, be friends, genuinely like and respect each other. Love is an action, not just a feeling.

[@wildolive3630]

I think the problem with a lot of marriages is that men marry women they don't love. Women need love to thrive.

[@yournextdoorgamerwithgames2945]

lol

[@AJourneyBackToEden]

And vice versa.. a lot of women just want to not be alone and like the initial feeling of being worshipped in a relationship. It isn't about them actually caring about the man, it's what they can get from the man and also what the man can get from the woman. This stuff isn't talked about much so a lot of society is influenced by Hollywood, lust, self centeredness..

[@catherinem4130]

Good points.....I was married 53 yrs....now widowed.....We definitely had LOVE 55 1/2 yrs! It was great even with all the trials, decisions, tough times....always LOVE...

[@pbrown119]

Did you ever have to deal with infidelity if so how did you get past it.

[@michelyalba4364]

I think he means picking someone you would hook up with is different from picking someone you enjoy being with everyday. Some people just see the romantic part of it and when that is gone the marriage is over. If you see the other person as a human that you enjoy being with, the appreciation grows each day more even when the initial excitement is gone.

[@StoryCut]

When I married my wife I told her, that im gonna take her with all her struggles

[@DonnaMccall-qc7oi]

That is so precious

[@laracroft5351]

I wouldn’t like that someone says I have struggles. I don’t do it either.

[@StoryCut]

@@laracroft5351 I know what you mean by that but I have never spoken of myself,I said her struggles

[@m.e.987]

I like the point, that when a person enters marriage, the person searches and do what is best for the other. I consider that as LOVE. Still, I believe that compatibility, respect to each other, sexual attraction, friendship are a great component in marriage. It is difficult to build a life with a person that doesn't treat you with dignity, that doesn't treat you as his/her equal, only think of himself/herself, doesn't speak with you, call you names and hit you and so on.

[@stevena9512]

Wait a minute: if a person doesn’t treat you well, WHY are you marrying that person? Does everyone have such a drastic change of behavior and patterns after they marry? Do they “suddenly and unexpectedly” begin chatting or talking with the opposite sex, start spending money, begin hitting you, talking ugly to you and others or did you just not pay attention to those attributes? People don’t just change, they may put on an act differently in front of others, but you know the “real” them. We have to take responsibilities for our bad decisions and maybe not be so quick to bite that apple, again.

[@Y1836Y]

If you both want what is best for the other, abuse is not present. It couldnt be. Abuse is all about dominance.

[@francesbeth2077]

Love someone for who they are.. and then stop looking. Make that agreement. Everyone has to decide what makes them fall in love. For me being loved and valued is on top. You should be someone's priority. Always communicate with the other person, your intentions and feelings towards then. If they can move on and live without you, they were not meant to be. I always thought they didn't like me. I never believed anyone cared about me.

[@liveagaincoachingministry1319]

So LOVE is important to you, right?

[@STak-ju7gx]

​@@liveagaincoachingministry1319Love is important. Infact love is the goal. If it's the christian perspective, then that should be obviously clear. The number one commandment is Love.

[@wallacegarrett3537]

I use to hear stories about men cheating on their wives, and I never understood that reasoning. I was so much in love with my wife that I did not see nor had feelings for no other women. I was so full of love for her that I had no room for any other. She was my one and only love that I desired to be with. My mom taught me not to cheat. She kept in check during my whole teenage years. If I had a phone call she would ask for the phone, speak to the young women and tell her her son had a girlfriend and she was calling to trying to get with her son; her was taken and had a girlfriend. If her calling was just a friendly call, fine. Just to let her know that I was taken. My mom said that I would not grow up to be a player like my father. She was on point. I grew to be a decent, respectable gentleman. I was cheated on by my ex-wives. Two of them got pregnant by their lovers. The third one wanted to leave her new husband, but she could not because she had too many children, and he was a mobster who would not let her leave. Being a good, loving man does not guarantee a good, happy, successful marriage. I just feel good because I believe I wasn't the one who messed up in the marriages.

[@lorenefairchild7616]

I married for love. We also share the same faith and similar worldview. We just celebrated our 7th anniversary.

[@maryeerickson-fl1jp]

I’ve been married 30 years, and I love my husband and he loves me.

[@miss_8thwonder]

You married for love or fell in love after the marriage?

[@kv2723]

​@@miss_8thwonderfalling in love after marriage does not work. That's nonsense.

[@laracroft5351]

… in Judaism marriages are often being arranged….

[@RussianOccupier190]

⁠@@kv2723that is not nonsense in India marriages are arranged couples begin without love but eventually since they are stuck in the marriage they fall in love in order to make things work out since they’re stuck together. Unlike in the west where couples fall in love before marriage and as years pass the love dies down and they end up divorced. arranged marriages are the best, when people marry for love they go through something called the honeymoon phase or love goggles and it prevents them from spotting red flags in the Other person unlike arranged marriages were is your family that chooses your spouse and the choose based on what is in the best interest of the family therefore marriages work out most of the time.

[@kam0406]

These words are so true! I am marrying my fiancé because I want to make his life better and easier and sweeter in every way - and he does the same for me! He has proven this time and time again through his actions. He is such a good, consistent, steady, relatable man and I am so grateful he is in my life- and so proud I will be able to call him my husband soon.

[@vondawhite1400]

What’s love got to with it? Tina Turner

[@TrapperKeeper999]

❤❤❤

[@MillyKayMilly]

All he gonna do is cheat.

[@kaynibuawolor5785]

@@MillyKayMillyyou know? How? Jealousy go shame 😂

[@Y1836Y]

Many nachas and blessings for both of you. May you be blessed with many children.

[@charlotteamalie]

Sorry, without love, there is NO marriage.

[@KC_Pittman]

You didn’t listen very well.

[@Cris_89Ari]

​@karenpittman6903 yes he did, you can't marry someone you don't love. love is not a decision, it's a feeling.

[@armenian_with_liza]

​@@Cris_89AriYes, love is both a feeling and a decision! I think people should marry only if they love, and also if some years later some people sadly start to think their love weakened they should make the decision to continue loving (not just not leaving, but also actually trying to remember the old times, going on dates, not looking at/thinking/talking to others and falling in love again) :)

[@Sky-yh3ml]

WITHOUT TRUST there’s no marriage. Life be is emotional, but it’s trust that allows us to exercise Faith

[@sheiswhitney]

Most marriages before 1950s in the US was due to opportunity or arrangement that people still to this day celebrate those marriages because they lasted several decades. Many women married before the 1970s because they couldn't secure housing, own a bank account and social pressure of normalcy without a husband. As women have garnered autonomy over their livelihood they are opting out of marriage.

[@maddogfargo3153]

I don't think the problem is marrying for 'love'. The TRUE meaning of love already requires things like humility, selflessness, self control, a mild spirit, and seeking the interest of the other person first. I think a big part of the problem is people replace 'love' with PASSION, EXCITEMENT, LUST...or some other selfish concept...but call it 'love'. And because they do not understand these things, they go into relationships for selfish reasons, and as a result are doomed to fail.

[@sweetyplk]

True

[@kv2723]

💯

[@BastetNoodles]

True...being "in love" is very different from actually loving someone. One is transient, the other is a solid base to build upon.

[@laracroft5351]

In Judaism marriages are often being arranged…

[@AJourneyBackToEden]

​@@BastetNoodlesI tend to interpret people saying "in love" as meaning "in lust".. it seems to describe when a person feels they are being made to feel good by the other person which has nothing to do with love.. I get tired of hearing people say I fell in love with this person because they were kind, they were funny, they looked nice... Those things have to do with amusing and pleasing themselves not actually caring about the person underneath those traits..

[@sanjayshah7776]

True words! Don't marry for LOVE. Don't marry for SEX. Marry because you want to make their life better + become a better person because of them

[@bive4167]

This works when both people view it like that. When only one does, it becomes burdening and draining. The correct attitude is, "let's make each other's life better. Let's compromise for eachother and if one of us becomes selfish in this, the other should leave.

[@ahoraateh1253]

"Marry because you want to make their life better + become a better person because of them" .... THAT IS LOVE 😂😂😂😂 if the opposite of love is hate, You can't want to make their life better and HATE THEM 😂😂😂😂😂😂 cmon

[@lifeoflindo]

@@ahoraateh1253Yes THAT IS LOVE 😊

[@howiehowdy]

Sex once every few years is really going great. Yea I think even God would say divorce her.

[@kv2723]

​@@ahoraateh1253the opposite of love is indifference

[@rosegrace9151]

I know a lot of women who felt this way as they wanted to have kids. Now they are unhappy or divorced, someone being in your life doesn’t mean you’ll love them. If there’s no love stay single, at least you can still fall in love that way.

[@AJourneyBackToEden]

I think the basis to be able to love people in your life is dependent on your moral compass.. right and wrong. If you care about how you affect others, if you care about other people's experiences, if you want to be a help to those around you and vice versa; if the people around you are the same in that way then you will care for each other and connect and that nurtures love versus lust which many couples base their relationship on because they want to use each other to not feel lonely, to feel wanted, to get money, to have a child, etc.. all self centered

[@rosegrace9151]

@@AJourneyBackToEden but caring for someone doesn’t mean you’re in love with them in a romantic sense

[@UWillSee83]

Finally some sense and reason being spoken. Thank you.

[@Rubysoho4244]

Marry for financial stability but fuck around for love. Got it, thanks rabbi!

[@freespirit-111]

😂😂

[@marymastandrea2640]

Lol

[@jolynn2271]

Good advice, you left out friendship before love or marriage.🤗❤️

[@blesildacalambro9459]

The right way of thinking, be whatever you want to attract. If you like love be loving, if you like compassion be compassionate. Set yourself up that you want to marry someone to make another person happy so you attract the same. Peace po.

[@saarapollonen8138]

Okay but the idea to have to have sex with someone I don't love is horrendous. I couldn't do that, and I bet many women agree. He's man so he probably doesn't get that unfortunately.

[@gbajobiadeoye2232]

You still don't get this yet. See my other comment.

[@AlishaH-vh5jy]

Yes true

[@abdulrazaqrahmat777]

He is saying not to be selfish, think of what you can do rather than what you can get for the purpose of marriage.

[@saarapollonen8138]

@@abdulrazaqrahmat777 I'm married with a guy I chose! Of course it's not always easy but I try my best. But the idea of being married to someone I don't love or didn't choose is just sick!

[@ironore1000]

So women are all knowing or know better. Clearly, the message went over your head. How arrogant, ignorant and sexist of you.

[@VNaols]

Servanthood. So good. Such a good reminder❤

[@lionessgroup6609]

Thankyou Rabbi . so good to hear from a wise older leader who can speak into the challenges of our day and time for longevity and favour

[@evacosby887]

Amen 🙏🏼 ty Rabbi 💕👏🏻👏🏻

[@nedamobasher8527]

Completely agree. Choose someone for marriage with brain and logic just like a business not emotions. Emotions and love change over time and they blind you

[@FrolleySimon-y7e]

That is so true have a blessed day

[@BonnieBland]

This! And everything I've had the privilege of hearing you speak about is profound and practical and meaningful words of wisdom! Thank you for sharing your voice with us!

[@cheesecakeloverbae]

I strongly disagree.....you marry someone because they love you as much as you love them....They will do anything for you as much as you would do for them....Then have your back when it's turned.....They can be trusted to guard and protect your heart.... They vibrate with you on the same level which enhances you both to Grow together and radiate the same energy...you can always be yourself with them and they feel like home.... That's why I married my partner.....That is the kind of person I want to Grow old with...with that mindset and qualities which is like no other....Thats what makes them special to me

[@rushiaskinnerwallace6175]

This man’s Wisdom and Truth Bombs are just about the best thing on the internet.

[@russlegibs4490]

Brother, you don't know how much I needed to hear that. Please keep the content coming

[@MarthaWoodworth-f9s]

When I met my husband of 25 years it was the first time I didn’t ask “Is he good enough for me?” Instead, I found myself asking “Am I good enough for him”? He seemed to glow, as if there was a halo around him. It was love at first sight and never went away. He truly was a dreamboat, on every level.

[@AtlantisIsMyHome]

You also don’t need to be married for someone to make their lives better….

[@Y1836Y]

You're talking about living together? No good. That's a fear of commitment. You don't want to marry or you'd be in that life forever. Might even be better though you wouldn't know. You want what's convenient. If your feelings or theirs change, you just leave. *** Had to edit my comment since auto-incorrect was at it again and I didn't notice. One line came out as nonsense.

[@STak-ju7gx]

​@@Y1836YI believe the person means that all sorts of people can make a person's life better. If a rich man woke up and game me a million dollars, he has definitely made my life better and it had nothing to do with marriage. My best friend makes my life better too, nothing to do with marriage as well.

[@blessyGel]

That's so true 🎉..right words time and person ..Thanks for d wisdom ..Choice and stand for d Promise

[@KayAccords]

In the times of hardship and disconnect it was LOVE who made us keep going. In times of peace and plenty it was LOVE who kept us strong.

[@JESUSSavesWAKEUP]

Listen to him young people. I was cheated on while pregnant with my house cleaner and 4 weeks postpartum. My faith is what is keeping me alive.

[@chiritacostel4495]

Such a wise philosophy for long term relationships 😊

[@peachberry2846]

You will never have true committment without making a covenant through marriage

[@peggyward]

Never heard to put so simply and easy to understand! Thank you, thank you, thank you!!😊😊😊😊

[@Journeyman-Fixit]

This "true" wisdom is priceless. Thank you

[@mifortalezaesmife3715]

Thank you I love your videos and I am reading your books I recommend them❤️🙏🍀

[@sylviazeh4659]

Yes, perfect for long-term successful happy relationships and marriage. 💑 The motive has to be sincere! ❤😊

[@graceburrell8800]

Love WAS ALL THAT WE HAD. AND LOVE IS ALL THAT HAS KEPT US TOGETHER FOR 54 YEARS.

[@christinaweber340]

Sounds like the mindset behind arranged marriages that are still common in some cultures. Marry someone who makes sense and love will come later. Sounds fine in theory, unfortunately so many of these marriages end up being very dysfunctional. Personally I would never marry someone if love and good sexual compatibility weren't already there. And yes, I'd totally expect them to be there for me and help me improve my life just as I'd do the same for them. No shame in that.

[@helycrisea8189]

I concur.

[@maddogfargo3153]

You do not understand what he is saying. Try re-watching the clip in it's entirety, and listen carefully.

[@kimberlygreen4386]

Wisdom 🤙‼️THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR SHARING!!!

[@TheRelger]

I got married and my wife thinks I’m here to make her life easy. I work, I clean the house, I renovate, fix cars, cut grass, shovel snow etc etc and she runs around doing whatever she wants, holidays, dinners with friends, taking courses, going out of town for retreats. I’m her patsy. But God doesn’t like divorce.

[@Ilovemd-p3f]

😢😢😢😢

[@bive4167]

See, this is what happens when only one person has the giving, selfless attitude. Please get out of it, sir. No person should be doubly burdened and have to think of thier spouse in this light.

[@Y1836Y]

Not true. A non Jewish idea of what G-d doesn't like.

[@Y1836Y]

You didn't marry someone who wanted to do for you as you're doing for her. Your mistake. It doesn't have to last a lifetime. Divorce her. Or enjoy being unhappy.

[@judegrindvoll8467]

You seem to think that you only have two choices - keep doing those things and be miserable, or divorce. There is a third way - simply stop doing those things. If she’s using your money to fund her lifestyle, stop that too. It’s a two way street and she doesn’t seem to be contributing at all. Let’s see what happens when you stop being a door mat 🤷🏻‍♀️ being selfless in a marriage only works when two people have the same attitude.

[@mikeundereood1071]

Much wisdom. Awake

[@BrenSoleo]

Love makes everything better. A marriage without love is like a car without the engine

[@disharaj8019]

This man is absolutely right we understand it very late😢

[@akshatakorgaonkar6895]

Love can happen gradually but most important is marrying a good person. If you're with a nice man everything falls in place. Man have that much power but sadly most of them are irresponsible especially in today's generation due to which marriages fail .

[@chrisfrench9257]

Look at you, blaming men in general. This sort of thinking must stop. Both men and women are capable of destroying a marriage, and the reasons/examples are many.

[@deanna.radiant]

Romantic love happens gradually? I must be from a different planet if this is true! Because in my case I can't force myself to romantically love and have a connection with a random man because he's a "good" person.

[@akshatakorgaonkar6895]

@@deanna.radiant No man falls in love instantly. Initially it's just an attraction. If he says he loves you in the initial days of dating that means he's love bombing . A genuine man will show care and affection but not fall in love. He might like you as a person but falling in love always takes time. And if you fall in love within no days of dating then that means you're having some kind of attachment problem that may be due to childhood trauma or neglect.

[@kv2723]

​@@deanna.radiantyou're right

[@shahidanwar7292]

SubhanAllah - beautifully spoken

[@englishwithjoy1106]

Thank you so much sir for the words of wisdom.

[@SumairaHussain23]

Love doesn't need marriage but for a marriage to be successful you need love

[@LwandileHL]

That true with family... We love them because we are one with them. We don't choose fam.

[@Freetoughts]

I agree. One of the feelings I had prior into marrying my husband was “I want to take care of this man and become a family with kids.” Alhamdulilah. Ofcourse we love eachother but I agree with the rabbi.

[@CP-012]

Husbands, love your wives… Wives, respect your husband. Paul to the Ephesians, chapter 5

[@ravgoni1]

I always found this verse interesting in that it doesn't say wives should also love their husbands. Respect and love don't always go together either.

[@lindahamilton3234]

That message is from the old testament. Not just the New Testament.

[@del1111]

When you don't truly love a person you can not respect them for long. This is where divorce mostly stems from. Love is the greatest and respect is a higher calling without it is difficult to keep a home together.

[@CP-012]

@@del1111 Respect is a choice. It’s easy to tear anyone apart. Respect in the relationship is not based on the individual, but on the title. You respect your father, not for who he is, but because he is your father. Same for the husband. Now I’m not saying this applies in an abusive situation, but always within social norms. You respect everyone and give them the dignity that they’re due. We must remember that they are created in the image of God.

[@kaynibuawolor5785]

BAM!👍🏾

[@PAMELAGAYLORD-e7j]

TRUE! MARRIAGE & LOVE ARE LIKE, TWO DIFFERENT ENTITIES!

[@barbaramurray4951]

Very sobering Rabbi. Thank you. Now I understand!!!

[@velvetindigonight]

Mind Blowing and True! Thank you as ever.

[@mustardseeds7]

Yes. Not everyone though is able to receive that kind of love; nor reciprocate that kind love... pouring into a person that doesn't reciprocate, typically because they can't receive it to reciprocate, eventually leaves one dry... trauma is so horrible for everyone! Ones that do, ones that get and ones that feel it's affects later... p.l.e.a.s.e. lets love each other better... 😢

[@mustardseeds7]

Trying here too. It'll all work out just fine. ABBA said so... Jeremiah 29:11 📖 And that's the best place to start. 🗝 Again. 🕊 But should we be careful not to idolize love in carnality? Is that programming from the soul and not HOLY SPIRIT LOVE?

[@jewishfan]

I learned so much from rabbi Friedman.

[@marina1463]

That is not about marriage that is about using people. And the message is: let people use you and do not complain. That is so awful.

[@longlostlibra]

More spot on advice. Thank you, Rabbi.

[@ArtByHazel]

Wise words Rabbi. Thank you.❤

[@donaldahern9930]

I married a woman i loved.A one way street.After 43 years we are still together.

[@AugustoCuervo-hx9pr]

Love is on another plain of reality, apart from marriage. A feeling cannot be compared to a full commitment responsibility. We decide to be together because we make each other stronger, so it is irrelevant to believe that "opposites attract", in terms of personality. Sometimes people have a lot in common and that does not diminish marriage.

[@miss_8thwonder]

Without love, there is no commitment & responsibility, some people like, Good men and good female do it out of culture, Where most get used and abused by one selfish narcissist for the other in the name of marriage (They use marriage as a tool & weapon)for their own selfishness!

[@bingodd7929]

Very very true n 100% truth

[@fisf.2148]

i completely agree that no one should be used to improve the other nor does the fact that you love someone mean that you must marry them

[@anonymousnation5235]

I have a question. If we don't marry the person you love, then are we supposed to be okay with the fact that they would not be with us and probably be taken away by someone else? Does this thought not scare people or people just don't care anymore?

[@fisf.2148]

@anonymousnation5235 I'm a woman in my thirties and many millions of us have come to the realisation that men tend not to love women most of the time since they don't even love themselves (even if you love them). They're very much in love with promiscous women in porn or instagram but settle for what they can get.

[@jananik20]

Then why are you loving that person?

[@lenyroslenni-il8ot]

That s a good advice Rabi

[@angelamuhindi6880]

I need another person in my life. Pray with me.

[@joiisler8986]

And Him, also.🙏🏽 It still takes Two.

[@angelamuhindi6880]

@@joiisler8986 yes. We both need prayer.

[@eulaprovo9786]

Thanks for d advice

[@grahamherbert3612]

Marriage can destroy relationships, It often increases expectations and can make people defensive.

[@poppybow3208]

Because of our lack of self control, it is better to marry than to burn 🔥

[@grahamherbert3612]

@@poppybow3208 Go tell that Mr Chinky Cheyeknee.

[@maddogfargo3153]

You obviously didn't think this through. Marriage is merely the formalizing of the commitment. Any relationship that hopes to be successful, whether formalized or not, REQUIRES commitment and a combined effort from each individual. BOTH parties will have expectations that need to be met for that to work. If you get defensive because the other person in your life has expectations or standards, then YOU are the problem in that relationship.

[@peachberry2846]

@@poppybow3208 amen! Speak

[@peachberry2846]

You will never have true commitment to someone without making a covenant to them through marriage

[@kring3l0rd]

If you re too affraid of sex, call it intercourse or intimacy. Dont give up on the guy that wrote "shut up! I love you".

[@munnibhaskar5798]

I told the same to my daughter some time back because I married with the same misconception and some how came out of that thought process. Life has taught me a lot of lessons. So, I told my daughter don't search a partner to make your life better but try to overcome your weaknesses on your own. Marriage is just companionship and not a platform to fulfill your expectations.

[@canelareina3795]

If your daughter is a sweet and beautiful young women she will have men eager to marry her, provide for her, and father children with her.

[@gasoranm.8449]

I understand and think is important and beautifol for me to have love in my marriage. Thank you!

[@IrinaAtanasova-cy2uz]

The DUMBEST thing you can do is to marry someone you don't love and desire.

[@asojourner3534]

He's so right. We've gotten consumed with the feeling of love. This is why the feeling of no love leads to divorce. Marriage is a vow before God. It's a commitment to this union that carries through one's life. What you need to make a marriage is respect. Mutual respect. With determined true (look it up) respect, everything else can work out. Long marriage in an intentional thing.

[@amjPeace]

It can be sad indeed when only one partner has the right attitude of making their mate’s life better while the other partner has the wrong mindset of marrying to improve their own life. Only with God’s help and a lot of work can this situation work out.

[@JenniferTyler-n9w]

Be kind and loving towards your partner

[@elkanalucile1534]

God is love and love must be in the heart of every people

[@twigsoflife]

love the thing you said😅😊

[@CatherineInColorado]

Absolutely! 💯

[@RodrigoMera]

This is pure pure wisdom. I've realized this recently.

[@danielmijares7600]

That’s a lovely truth.

[@tiarawhite3481]

I married because I love my husband and we connected in ways that I didn’t connect with anybody else. We also make each other’s lives better. It has been a low time but we got through it and still going strong. Been married 8 years! We love each other!!! ❤ We love each other selflessly ❤

[@lustwaffe9000]

Yeah, thats why people keep cheating on their spouses. Because their marriage is loveless. But love for a person doesnt last a lifetime, unless you are fully committed to loyalty to your spouse and children.

[@foothillgirl7989]

Married 27 years with one thing in common: we both want him to be happy.

[@laracroft5351]

😂😂🤣

[@carpejkdiem]

BIBLICAL helpmate

[@Oo7Hola]

I adore this rabbi

[@beckyj3314]

Amen! 🙌

[@Steven-u8c]

Love thy neighbor as I love you!!!

[@tadhikarasa1938]

You are wise

[@qe1dayatime]

Go Rabbi Manis ....speak truth to truth...

[@Lamgiahuy_97]

They are very wise words

[@anamairarezendedebritogama3]

Marriage without love is something unthinkable. When you really love a person you do whatever you can to make them happy!