Mary and Joseph in 2020

"Caesar Augustus just issued a tweet." John Crist and Sarah Zanotti imagine how the Christmas story would have been different if Mary and Joseph lived in 2020.
John Crist is a standup comedian. For more videos, bio and live tour dates, visit www.johncristco...

[@chaylenandolino3867]

“This kid, He’s not gonna be perfect” “Hmmmm I think He is” Praise the Father🙌🏽🙌🏽

[@Matheussrrego]

Ummmhh amen

[@SeraphinaoftheBayou]

Amen

[@zanegib169]

Amen yessir

[@rjules1083]

Amen 🙏 ❤️

[@marisaturner955]

Yessss!! 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾

[@Aced_Dreamer]

"Well I'm pregnant, and we are just engaged, so I'm not gonna miss the judgemental stares from your inlaws." 🤣🤣🤣

[@woodbrassandglass]

Feel the silent judgement...

[@korinakorinakorina]

I'm so confused by that loool didnt they marry right after Joseph had the angel come to him?

[@lilchristuten7568]

@@korinakorinakorina It isn't recorded when they were actually married (had the ceremony) but according to Jewish law an engagement was a legally binding part of marriage. They were technically already married but they were supposed to wait 1 year between them getting engaged and the time when the man was allowed to take his wife home and consummate their marriage.

[@laceandribbonsviolin]

I think they waited til Jesus was born to consummate the marriage and I feel that, I wouldn’t have been tempted to do any frisky bidness hiking on a drudgerous trek to be counted like a head of cattle while great with child💁🏻‍♀️

[@woodbrassandglass]

@@laceandribbonsviolin omg...

[@cheyoda]

😂😂😂 and she is just eating, eating and more eating. They are hilarious.

[@StupiderWithAB]

I feel stupider after watching this. But not as stupid as i feel after watching my videos.

[@susancnw59]

I certainly did.

[@elisabethwarner3845]

I absolutely love that she ate ice cream, chips, and a pita in one conversation 🤣

[@thomast8539]

@@elisabethwarner3845 and off her shirt

[@jocelyneke6445]

She is big and lovely. It is Jesus!

[@AwkwardlyTimedVideosOfficial]

Glad to see Christian comedy isn't dead 😂 😂😂

[@StupiderWithAB]

I love this. Almost as much as i love my stupid comedy videos.

[@LeBeautiful]

Right? I’m just trying to see a part two of “If Bible Characters had Social Media” 😂😂

[@rpatterskc1]

Trey Kennedy

[@owenkilcup6504]

Just like jesus

[@t.r.everstone7]

I see what you mean, but I'm Jewish and that's just comedy period. Anyone with a sense of humor could enjoy this. It's well scripted and acted. The key to good Christian comedy or any other kind is to just be good. I wish more people would just try to be funny and stop trying to mark a checklist of things to say or reference for a particular demographic

[@FinancialShinanigan]

In 2020, Jesus turns LaCroix into White Claw

[@MiniPainterGamerDadD20]

Top comment.

[@Silver-cl2bd]

😂👏

[@laurelhill4358]

Ha!! That's hilarious!🤣

[@dhfjgktdmfhfj1716]

Bahaha

[@janetbrandes929]

I can turn wine into puke...top that Jesus!

[@tracycooper572]

This is hysterical! I love when she calls him "Joe" lol!

[@kabookeo]

mine too. lol

[@patymartin8568]

Lol... Me too 😂😂

[@adrielle.benner]

*Inconvenience in biblical times:* “We have to stop traveling so I can give birth in a stable.” *Inconvenience in 2020:* “We have to book an air bnb.”

[@jj6656]

I actually thought the Inconvenience in 2020 was to click "Read More" to read this damn comment! 😐

[@adrielle.benner]

@@jj6656 I conveniently solved your ‘inconvenience’ with a backspace, God forbid you have to click read more to read more comments of your own volition

[@jj6656]

@@adrielle.benner Hahaha, You shouldn't have. It was just funny to click Read More and then realize how 'inconvenienced' I felt. But thanks 😅

[@adrielle.benner]

@@jj6656 I almost lost my mind over bad internet connection on a zoom call this morning so I feel you

[@jj6656]

@@adrielle.benner And then ya gotta repeat yourself or try to catch up with what's said or as I do just nod in agreement and float in oblivion....

[@niniandsunny1353]

The only mother ever right about saying their kid is perfect...Mary, mother of Jesus!

[@shaylasomerville4733]

So true the rest of us just call our babies ' a diaper in a viper!

[@niniandsunny1353]

@@shaylasomerville4733 🤣

[@livingbytheword707]

❤

[@theambientsound8020]

Never mess with a pregnant woman when she starts snacking.

[@JMarieCAlove]

Lol My sister is seven months pregnant, she’s having a girl... she been craving chocolate chip cookies and tortilla chips! Lol

[@cesiajades]

Yeet tha snack when ya mad! *YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEET!!!!*

[@hobishamburgerandsprite2542]

@@cesiajades you need some god in your life

[@Lukasandsomenumbers]

Mary: Im pregnant, Also Mary: its Christmas eve

[@davidt01]

Should've been like, "What's Christmas?"

[@GoldBass]

@@davidt01 exactly. Or “Is that what we’re calling our Son’s birthday? Why not Michaelmas? The angel’s name that spoke to me was called Michael.”

[@justanotherbaptistjew5659]

Gerald Bryant That was Gabriel.

[@Eljay037]

@@davidt01 no, its historically accurate bc pagans were celebrating christmas loooong before Jesus was born. Especially since Jesus was never even born on Dec. 25.

[@davidt01]

@@Eljay037 No, because it's called "CHRISTmas" (Christ mass)?. They celebrated pagan holidays before, but not Christmas.

[@colink4842]

I love the ending. “This kid isn’t going to be perfect”...”I think he is.”

[@spence_903]

Love this guy, he should have his own show

[@StupiderWithAB]

I enjoy the stupidity. Almost as much as i enjoy the stupidity of my stupid comedy videos.

[@quanyenwashere]

I believe he will.

[@natalielane6421]

He was going to have one last year.

[@johnstown2451]

He has one, it’s called KZbin... It’ll have more views than cable.

[@bennyzebra1386]

@@StupiderWithAB shut up, stop advertising

[@sophiem88]

“It’s Christmas Eve” I’m pretty sure Christmas didn’t exist yet 😆

[@RossBaby91]

She should’ve said the winter solstice for accuracy

[@munenex]

I can't believe we're missing Christmas...

[@dasugo]

cant believe you didnt reply her "we are only engaged" line without hitting back with a "Am not the father" retort.

[@grantm6514]

Yeah, "You're pregnant and we both know it's not mine, wanna talk about that?" Followed by: "Hey Mary, THREE guys just showed up with gifts for the baby - I think we need to talk"

[@ninabanks8815]

@@grantm6514 😆 🤣

[@museluvr]

Actually at this point in St Joseph and Mary' life, they were married.

[@Harlem.Sweetie]

🤣🤣🤣🤣😭😭😭

[@Harlem.Sweetie]

@@grantm6514 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@Shaloha808]

Love the "La Croix" foreshadowing. For those who don't know; French for "The Cross."

[@supergene256]

WHOA!! Awesome!!

[@zacharysiple629]

Innkeeper: Stop! You can't come in without a mask! Joseph: We're sorry, we forgot it. Innkeeper: You can't come in, then! Joseph: Look, my wife is in labor, can't you just make an exception? Innkeeper: No mask, no service! Joseph: I'm sorry, but but my wife needs to go somewhere to have her baby! Innkeeper: Fine, go to the stable then. Just stay 6 feet away from the animals! Just an idea for a sequel! :)

[@1988vannah]

👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾 come on here creativity!

[@zacharysiple629]

@@1988vannah Thank you! I didn't think this would get so popular! :)

[@NdiNaija]

Ooh this will be so good!!!

[@nadinestewart9279]

I wants at least two more parts to their video. Yes was upset it just ended there I wanted the whole story man

[@ashleyp9109]

Did you know their was not actually mentioning of a inn keeper in the Bible? But this would be so funny 😂 and I do want another part to it!

[@gcf]

I love how she calls him Joe 😂

[@finn3625]

Dude Mary is such a mood for 2020

[@ghettomarc50]

"Just tell them to Amazon prime it."

[@Grassmpl]

Double prime it to use RSA encryption

[@Dawn-tv1bk]

Eating the crumb off her belly😂😂😂

[@garlicgirl3149]

I cracked up too!

[@wagnerbertolino2]

yes!!! 😄

[@robynsmith4164]

YASSS!!! I was looking to see if anyone mentioned it and YOU did!😂😂😂

[@debiogle3798]

Been there done that!

[@peggyvick935]

“MARY”, is PERFECT❗️ So realistic. She seemed so intense with the snacking ❗️😂 Great job you two❤️

[@trevorlambert2892]

Can’t we just mail in the census? It’s supposedly safe 😂

[@traviswilliams1296]

😂🙌

[@dealio1762]

Mail ins! 😬

[@tiffanyroth9722]

🤣😂 the nightmare of USPS 🤐🤐

[@toribowman8960]

I love "three intelligent males" You're awesome, John. Keep up the good work!

[@recoveringsoul755]

why males? Isn't THAT sexist? Like why not intelligent females?

[@annjoseph5429]

They are referring to 3 wise men in the story

[@bennyzebra1386]

@@annjoseph5429 he was being sarcastic

[@stevendchu]

Plot twist: those 3 males wouldn't even be allowed in the country in 2020

[@billthebax5578]

@@recoveringsoul755because they’re all blondes. ;-) had to, my wife loves blonde jokes 😂

[@BlessedBeyondCompare]

"Mmmm... I think he IS." Best line, so glad you guys saved it for last. And the BEST part is where he says she's emotional and she gives an evil glare to the camera like she's about to cut him right now. Haha

[@jolenethetoolwomantaylor5973]

Ha ha! This kid is not going to be perfect. Hmm, “I think He is”. So great!!!

[@savahbejin7511]

I like how John pulled an Andy Griffith. He set her up for the jokes and he more or less played the straight man.

[@colleengifford2553]

Picking the food off her belly and eating with a deadpan expression-I’m dead.

[@AutumnLuvsJesus]

"He's not gonna be perfect" "I think He is." Swoooooooooooooooooon! ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

[@stayyoung3874]

The chemistry and comfort between you two... so great 😀

[@jacobgrimes6187]

“This kid, he’s not gonna be perfect” 😂

[@kevinlawrence3036]

“You, me, the baby and this guy (Alpaca)” 😂

[@babetravelling]

Mary and Joseph will have d best IG posts ever

[@MoriahJeanae]

I love the signature John talk-to-the-hand motion...."ok, I don't know what that means....you're emotional and with child and I'm gonna choose to ignore that" 🤣

[@ChrisGarcia.]

😂 😂 That’s Hilarious I hope that everyone watching this has a very merry Christmas God bless you in Jesus name! 🎄 🎁 🎄

[@tkmiller_author]

You too!!!

[@ChrisGarcia.]

@@tkmiller_author 🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼

[@jolenethetoolwomantaylor5973]

You as well!

[@ChrisGarcia.]

@@jolenethetoolwomantaylor5973 blessings!

[@StupiderWithAB]

I love this. Almost as much as i love my stupid comedy videos.

[@angiesewtherapy6628]

I love how she's eating the whole time. When I saw the post I thought... touchy subject but they played it better than the name suggests. Loved the ending.

[@sunrider3238]

His expressions just kills me, especially when he drops his head on the counter 😂😂😂 and she’s just eating like it’s another day and it’s so funny 😆!!!! A Golden Globe for this guy! My older brother is going through the same thing with his wife and they are pregnant with their first kid, just so happens to be a boy lol

[@sunrider3238]

@@ChineduOpara *perfect indeed* 😅

[@luv2dancesalsa]

Praise the Lord. alternatively, Praise Allah. LOL Congrats!!!

[@ashleyburnham6924]

“People still use Twitter?” OMG YESSS

[@StupiderWithAB]

I enjoy the stupidity. Almost as much as i enjoy the stupidity of my stupid comedy videos.

[@Christian-gz2py]

@@StupiderWithAB, mate. Stop it. Spamming videos will discourage people from wanting to watch your videos.

[@kaylawaters2691]

I'm more surprised that people still use facebook or Linked In. Lol.

[@monopolizeme]

“This kid, is not gonna be perfect.” “Hm... I think he is.” I died 😂

[@evanstanek5838]

I'm still stuck in the "it's Christmas eve" circular reference 🙃😆

[@Rood67]

An angel *told me in a dream* to watch this comedy gold! Thanks John, and thank the Lord you’re back and doing better; we missed you.

[@DavisLMoore]

I think this is why Jesus actually came 2020 years ago😂😂

[@suiko2fan2]

More like 6-3bc, but yes the sentiment is true.

[@DavisLMoore]

@@suiko2fan2 Well, I was going to say 2000, but I hate it when people say that, so it was closer😂

[@nataliegerdano6028]

He was definitely thinking ahead that one!😂😂❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

[@runkytunkleshorts7996]

John always comes up with the best video ideas! 😂

[@pjcShorts]

He's the best comedian! I checked out your channel Runky Tunkle Shorts. It's very cool!

[@godschica14]

"Just tell them to Amazon prime it..." 😂😂😂 That's priceless!!

[@marvinthemaniac7698]

The cleverness behind this is mindblowing!

[@pipasmr2011]

"Your parents jdjfjfnrfnfkfkeebsb" 😂 we've all been there. Lol

[@trinaminnieweather3079]

The3 B4nker...That was my favorite part🤣🤣🤣!!!

[@JessicaSmith-ie7cm]

MINE TOO!!!!🤣

[@prairiepetresort1698]

My husband and I LOVE your comedy !! We all desperately need a laugh right now 😃

[@iammakoa.]

A normal John Crist video: 10/10 A John crist video with her in it: 100/10

[@bizzyfit2128]

I love how she is getting down with the snacks the whole time!

[@kristendoran2591]

Awesome! Loved how realistic it is for both centuries!

[@thesistersclub1007]

This has to be one of John’s best videos. Definitely on my list of favorites 😂🤣😅

[@iammakoa.]

“Wait... why do we have to go to the man’s hometown? Isn’t that a bit sexist?” Honesty imagine if Mary actually said that

[@StupiderWithAB]

I feel stupider after watching this. But not as stupid as i feel after watching my videos.

[@katrinareads]

@@NadiasCloud True. Both their lineages traced back to David.

[@christophersmith1694]

I think they were both born in Bethlehem...

[@iammakoa.]

Yes they were but my point is the exchange

[@ethniebarnhouse895]

“Will we vaccinate it?” 😂😂

[@recoveringsoul755]

it?

[@runkytunkle4294]

John makes the best Joseph! 😂😂

[@StupiderWithAB]

I love this. Almost as much as i love my stupid comedy videos.

[@iammakoa.]

It’s hilarious

[@tristanfowler1334]

@@StupiderWithAB Will you stop replying to all these comments trying to promote your own videos?

[@Pumamike82]

You mean "Joe" hahaha

[@juliemarek5088]

@@tristanfowler1334 I just keep reporting him.

[@esther4990]

It's funny how Mary ate like 4 different foods in one conversation.

[@tumphlett110767]

I think this is one of his best skits! 🤣🤣🤣

[@bradmiller9993]

Toooooo funny! There should be a part 2; hurry, please.

[@jannexah]

I lost it at three intelligent guys wanting to bring gifts 🤣🤣🤣

[@lw3269]

They have great chemistry.

[@whome6410]

👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻⭐️this was the best!!! Brilliant! I so wish this was an actual series... ❤️

[@lindenpeters2601]

Let it not be forgotten that since Joseph's family was from Bethlehem, he had relatives there. Even if they were distant relatives, they saw each other every year. Wonder why no one would take them in...

[@GlennRiccobono]

I mean they may or may not have known about Mary being pregnant and Joseph not being the father and figured... No way reputational risk Or Joseph just tried to keep Mary hidden *put her away privily* as it said in scripture. Yay? Nay?

[@lindenpeters2601]

@@GlennRiccobono Could be. A scandal like an unwed pregnancy would be hard to conceal after a bit, so I don't doubt everyone knew. But true, he may have been hiding her away.

[@queentinadoire6931]

I believe Joseph was trying to keep their lives private- His family might have not believed that Mary was conceived by the Holy Spirit. Joseph was simply avoiding the family drama.

[@MePiertha]

Good job John on having Sarah act with you! She's awesome!

[@nataliemartin8288]

The way she carelessly drops that last little piece of food!!!!!😂😂😂😂😭😭😭All of this is SO HAAAA-LARIOUS!!!😂😂😂😭😭😭❤❤❤

[@meganlewis2424]

I need more of these, do the story where they left Jesus behind.

[@unashamedofthename4801]

Yes! Yes! Yes!

[@taylor2343]

How is it Christmas eve before jesus is even born...

[@esterf2545]

Scheduled c-section 😌

[@RayeShao]

That's the joke. Also anthropologically and according to the Jewish calendar Jesus was born sometime in April /May.

[@recoveringsoul755]

that's Emmanuel not Jesus. They were supposed to name him Emmanuel, not sure where all this jesus stuff came in. Were their twins? I thought Christ was born in the fall, like September 11 maybe?

[@Some_One_One]

@@recoveringsoul755 Emmanuel = Jesus = God = Christ = The Father = I AM. Get it?

[@recoveringsoul755]

@@Some_One_One but jesus didn't know everything like his father did. Didn't know who touched his hem in the crowd. God is too perfect to be on earth mingling with sinners. At least that's what they told me, but he knows everything and is everywhere at once So maybe christ was a physical manifestation of God but mortal so God could understand better what being human is like

[@kirstyw.6854]

“Think of the likes” 👍🏼“He’s not going to to perfect” “I think He is” dead 😂😂😂

[@Idk-zo5el]

I literally thought it was an ad lol. I accidentally clicked on it too, but it was funny especially the "people still use twitter?" part. Loved ittttt 💜

[@jillmahal4695]

"I know, Joe" - as she picks a crumb from her belly and eats it!!!! Brilliant. :)

[@KINGJESUSPRINCESS]

Your best yet!!! I needed this today😉

[@kellywilson6205]

JOHN AND SARAH WIN CHRISTMAS!!!!!! LOL This was PERFECTION!!!! Bravo!!!! Can't wait for a New Years Vid. from you both!

[@Some_One_One]

That was great and WOW, SHE CAN REALLY ACT! great job you two. I'm sharing this with two.

[@dagman85]

This was comedy gold! Well done, both of you.

[@amandawilson7555]

I needed a good laugh! Nailed it.

[@robbk7099]

Nailed it. Ha!!!!!!

[@isaacmathews4693]

Hahahahaha!!!! God's parents here, y'all. Merry Christmas and HAPPY BIRTHDAY JESUS.

[@rickcopy]

Merry Christmas and happy New Year. Jesus Christ bless you!

[@jstluvhumor7451]

Absolutely so hilarious, I have watched it so many times. Keep going John!

[@ninjunc]

Ahhh yes, the judgmental stares from the in-laws. Priceless.

[@myrealnameisjohndoe116]

Especially when the pregnant mother’s only 16😅

[@Dermatillomaniac]

Hilarious! Thank you for this.

[@kmhkmh5806]

She is giving me so much life, with her attitude and blog references. Love this! Are yall really having a boy?

[@blackswiftie2860]

*"A RUUUUstiiiiC B A R N"* -Modern Mary 🤣😁👌🏾

[@ellaseedorf6840]

“it’s christmas eve” me: didn’t Christmas not exist until Jesus is born?

[@imperiumcommentingnetwork4677]

"you're emotional and with child" *Modern Joseph slept on the couch on a seperate house that night.*

[@bryce5457]

This is GOLD

[@dhfjgktdmfhfj1716]

The funniest and most natural couple in your videos! You two are percet together ❤

[@mariarobes4187]

Hahaha, love it, Air B&B a barn with animals, yes sign me up🤣

[@sharonthrockmorton26]

This is so hilarious 😂 I have been laughing for 12 hours. Thank you 🤣

[@JackG_Entertainment]

*this is too realistic*

[@thomast8539]

I love when he breaks the fourth wall at 1:10. LOL

[@ozzy2929]

Jesus: " I identify as a *GOD* "

[@covertops.]

You're getting better and better! Love these skits!

[@beulaho]

"Just think about the photo op" 🥴

[@shaylasomerville4733]

I love your wife she sang justify ' great song and she's so talented .. Glory to God

[@chloemurdoch9074]

They keep talking about Christmas like it's happened the year before 😂

[@ZiggyLu-og3zp]

😂🤣😂 I love her! Such a good actress. John, we need you during this time man!

[@thomast8539]

Best thing I have seen in a while. Very funny and yet, still reverent. Nice job. Luke 2:1-7

[@nadinestewart9279]

Oh my gosh I want a part 2 and a Part 3. Please please please 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

[@Trackstar_]

When it says 3 minutes ago. 😂😂😂

[@KelahCash]

"You're emotional & you're with child. I'm gonna chooose to ignore that." 😩🤣😭 This whole thing was so funny.

[@womanofstill]

“I know, Jo” 😂😂😂

[@okthenluvly9464]

Pls do more! These are so cool!

[@delaineyjohnson8238]

Gender reveal: Better than a gender reveal that caused an entire fire with evacuations!! ~CA resident

[@philipbyersoutdoors3295]

Brilliant!!