Matthew Hussey Shares Text from Wife that Shook Him | The Drew Barrymore Show

Relationship expert and life coach Matthew Hussey sits down with Drew Barrymore to talk about the 4 levels of importance in a relationship. Plus, he reveals the text he received from his now-wife that shook him and taught him an important lesson.
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Mathew Hussey Shares Text from Wife that Shook Him | The Drew Barrymore Show
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[@anyabelle]

"No one can be important to me that does not choose me."

[@silentgrove7670]

Is the best way to accomplish this .... to be alone ?

[@sbeth82sc]

​@silentgrove7670 It's important to choose ourselves first, create a life we love where we don't depend on having a partner, a partner is an addition to our lives, it's so important to be okay with being without a partner and being fulfilled ,then authentic love can come in.

[@kiananejabat]

Even Matthew Hussey ghosts 😂

[@BrooklynBaby100]

He’s a man so yes that’s what they do.

[@jeniferkenney2984]

Omgosh right?! What were you thinking Matt?! Lol

[@queenj.8i895]

lol! Funny. But…he didn’t tho 🙃

[@jeniferkenney2984]

@@queenj.8i895 he kinda did for a little bit.

[@KatieDMellott7]

Hahahaha

[@carolyn6990]

“ You can grieve out of disappointment that they weren’t the one but you can’t grieve as if they were the one.” Wow, that statement resonated with me at a deep level. Next level advice Matthew!

[@nidhikmth]

true this was brilliant ! Have felt this

[@Weronika-ev4gp]

But he was the one... life is over.

[@meesh1002]

Most guys wouldn’t be able to handle that message. Good for him

[@ilsevdg1194]

Haha, it allows for an early triage 😊

[@AquaGemExplorer]

So many I dated , got numbed out on such a message... Feminized Men 😅

[@jessicam3707]

I just love that Matthew ended up with the exact kind of woman he always said was attractive. It shows that first of all, they’re meant to be, and second, he has always meant what he said. He didn’t just end up with some famous model (although she looks like one) or someone with a flashy, exciting life, he found someone who is authentic and mature and kind like himself.

[@888alp]

Yes but he was looking for a woman who is has money and career driven. There is nothing wrong with that but I feel he wouldn’t date someone who just didn’t earn big bucks.

[@Nah-ah]

@@888alptheir busy lifestyle wouldn’t match! They need to keep up with each other. My ex (childhood sweetheart) was a pro-footballer. That didn’t work out bc our lifestyles were completely different after his career took off! I met my now husband and had a baby which was what I wanted a few yrs later! My ex went on to play overseas for the next 10 yrs, then met and married his now wife who’s a huge traveler and they both have a couple of kids.

[@foxy_k9]

@@888alp may I ask how do you know if Audrey has money and career driven? I didn't find anything about her online. I actually thought she was jobless because she is in his videos all the time 🤔

[@kapsi]

"I just love that Matthew ended up with the exact kind of woman he always said was attractive." - half his age?

[@SamShank175]

​@@888alphe wants to know that they're not after him for his big bucks.

[@NicoleBeepath]

The fact that they still ended up together even though Matthew didn't know immediately after that she was going to be his wife gives me hope. I like to see examples that having standards instead of playing games is what works. Be true to you. Btw, Drew is such a style icon!

[@_good_for.]

You voted Biden right?

[@NicoleBeepath]

@@_good_for. I'm Canadian living in Canada.

[@_good_for.]

@@NicoleBeepath ok mam

[@EdelweisSusie]

Yes - I too wonder why Audrey chased (albeit in a subtle way) multi-millionaire Matthew!

[@bm5_5_5]

Exactly you’ll never miss out on what’s right for you if you stay true to yourself ❤

[@thematthewhussey]

Loved this conversation Drew!! Thank you everyone for watching! ❤

[@crystalanamericaninsicily]

Your the NUMBER 1 Dating Coach for a Reason? 😂❤

[@KG-bliss]

I second that... Matthew is in a league of his own... and because of this, I understand the level I am on... admiration... everything is exciting ... but two more to go... I love Matthew ❤

[@acemilondoner8489]

Audrey needs her own podcast, preach us girl 😂

[@RMFeminine4TheWin]

*she sounds like a legit 'Spiritual Gangsta'. well done & best wishes to you both!!!* 🫂💍💙

[@AriesAndScorp]

Great KZbin video!

[@crystalanamericaninsicily]

Ladies. Live and LEARN. Keep your STANDARDS!

[@Dinhi-gq9rb]

Don't listen to this fraud LOL if you have any standards please look at the credit card and retreat scam he has been running for almost a decade!!!! 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@jigggro]

I wish I had the courage to be this straightforward. It would have saved me a lot of heartache.

[@TilikaVispute]

No one can be important to me that doesn’t choose me 👍🏻💯

[@monicadub5280]

Tactic = manipulation. Her message came across as honest and he honored her honesty

[@TheWilDOn31]

He didn't. She honoured herself by sticking to her standard after that text.

[@ebbyc1817]

it was a very interesting message. she neither ignored him, nor pandered to him. I would have ignored him. Basically I would have read the text and thought "wtf does this mean" and not replied. lol

[@StellaWilson-f1w]

@@ebbyc1817that’s understandable. Most of the time you set yourself up for heartbreak. They’re coming back just to see if they have access to you. It’s an ego thing

[@ebbyc1817]

@@StellaWilson-f1w Ha so that's why they do it. I'm somewhat naive, but what I don't like is decoding messages. If I have to ask, what does this mean, I'm not replying, unless it's part of an ongoing conversation.

[@tashmabailey9291]

That tactic and standard was such a eye opener for me

[@vicklou]

"No one can be important to me when they do not choose me" when it comes to love life - love it, so important!

[@stanleymason-od4ls]

Interesting video. My relationship of 5 years ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to leave me, I really love her so much I can’t stop thinking about her, I’ve tried my very best to get her back in my life, but to no avail, I’m frustrated, I don’t see my life with anyone else. I’ve done my best to get rid of the thoughts of her, but I can’t, I don’t know why I’m saying this here, I really miss her and just can’t stop thinking about her.

[@tomachibald]

its difficult to let go of someone you love, i was in a similar situation, my relationship of 12 years ended, but i couldnt just let her go i did all i could to get her back, i had to seek the help of a spiritual counselor who helped me bring her back

[@stanleymason-od4ls]

Amazing, how did you get a spiritual counselor, and how do i reach her?

[@tomachibald]

Her name is Shelly renee white , and she is a great spiritual counselor who can bring back your ex.

[@stanleymason-od4ls]

Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked her up now online. impressive

[@debbied9152]

5years. Relationship your kidding me. Why did you not marry her. No wonder she flue the coop.

[@dachsrottweiler]

Well, she wasnt ruthless, just sincere. He ghosted her in a way, and she called out the situation. Just normal conversation basically. But im glad everything worked out for them. Wish them well

[@thehappyproject7117]

She was watching his videos😂

[@thehappyproject7117]

@@xinhuagabriel1694yes I always thought it was doing too much but it worked for her.😂

[@alexandrasantu4624]

​@@xinhuagabriel1694 the message he taught was inspired by her, not the other way around. They were already a couple when he made that video

[@PolonaP]

/

[@yzma6142]

Lmfao

[@peonypink7943]

"No-one can become important to me that doesn't choose me." ❤

[@davicrockett2619]

I am so glad Drew found Matthew Hussey! I have been following his approach with standards and honesty for the past several years! Amazing. Just incredible.

[@crystalanamericaninsicily]

YES! She's so Beautiful and Intelligent but doesn't VALUE herself! Stop falling in love who INVESTED nothing!!!

[@Ang36914]

Just shows how Matthew himself isn't immune to these kinds of behaviours. I'm starting to see that all of us, men and women, have bad habits that show up in relationships that usually stem from childhood wounds or some kind of fear/insecurity. The important part is that she called it out and he recognized it enough to change!

[@tombithecat4664]

Audrey had been definitely watching his videos and following his advise😂 I clearly remember this topic from one his videos

[@Mushroom321-]

😮😅😂

[@Adelina24244]

Yess Absolutely!! She has definitely watched his videos because I remember a lot of his videos where he wrote this

[@iterealice]

which video is it?

[@tombithecat4664]

@@iterealice It was one of the short videos the title was "Say this to your EX when he reaches out after ghosting"

[@iterealice]

@@tombithecat4664 thank you

[@DearSybersue]

Maintaining your self respect and having boundaries is always important in any relationship! ❤

[@jennifer5309]

I have been watching Mathew Hussey for years!!! His work helped me through a difficult breakup. Thank you Drew for having him on your show!

[@ksjjs0309]

Drew’s clipping at the end, lmao!😂

[@carollancianese1371]

THIS IS MY ENTIRE LIFE GO ON😂😂😂😂 YES it's everyone's 🤣

[@JessiWho]

Im glad it put him in check - we all need a reality check sometimes

[@dg5175]

Just goes to show even as an expert, you can still mess up. Good for her in how she handled it though.

[@KG-bliss]

The mess-up is human ... also I love that his wife is the woman he is teaching us to be... Have standards... know your value... she got this amazing man...

[@EmpoweringPeopleCoaching]

This is what is referred to as speaking your truth and effectively communicating.. Audrey spoke her truth diplomatically and respectfully this is how all couples must speak to one another it would reduce the amount of arguments couples have.. Another example is telling your partner to get off their phone when in actual fact generally our truth is we feel their phone is more important than spending time with us.. Speak your truth respectfully and Instead share with you them that either you miss them, or you want to spend some quality time with them. Also let them know how them being on their phone makes you feel. If you cannot be truthful with the one you love that's not a connected relationship.. Awesome relationship topic.

[@jeniferkenney2984]

Omgosh i cabt believe hes married now! I knew he was engaged a while back but didn't realize he got married just this last year. Congratulations Matthew! So happy for you and your wife! Ive started watching you on KZbin since the beginning especially when i was going through a rough divorce then dating again. You definitely helped me out a lot. Im so glad you found your person. She is definitely one lucky gal. ❤

[@InnerResearcher]

"Last week I fell in love, got rejected, we broke up, and it was all in my head". hahah, well, if thaaaat isn't relatable!! 😅😅😂💀

[@TilikaVispute]

6:03 THIS!!! As a recovering people pleaser I so back this thought!

[@ilsevdg1194]

Spot on!!!! Stage number 2 is very dangerous and misleading to the heart. That's when the common sense has to kick in. But it's very hard. You tend to think that the connection is the most important thing. But you forget that there's also the degree of importance and priority that one gives to that connection, that can differ. And that life's circumstances can get in the way. And then there's also the character and the set of values of the person.... It's a ruthless game.😢 But it's better to lose early. Than to see it all go down later.

[@kk-xi8li]

Attention is not intension. Love this

[@donata7733]

What a surprise , she did exactly what he's teaching in his videos and books. Cool girls listen to you too Matthew 😁

[@jeanettefujikawa]

Very important and powerful last statement!

[@thefindinglovepodcast]

This was such an insightful conversation! It's a great reminder of the power of honest and authentic communication in a relationship. I've always loved framing my experiences as stories, especially Love Stories, it brings me closer to understanding and appreciating the depth of those moments.

[@folakemibrown-emodi5963]

Someone once told me that when someone sends a "Hello, stranger" or "I miss you" after a long silence, its an emotional booty call. The person sending it is usually bored and lonely and scrolling through their phone.

[@habeebbombata9908]

Compatibility is immeasurable without commitment and intentionality, because you’re not going into it with a resolution to both seek solutions to problems. Commitment also adds further depth that allows you weigh the reasons to stay more than the reasons to not. I like this order a lot, pretty much put my thoughts out there.

[@nicolebrown2641]

I feel you Drew, I feel you! Such a great interview!!

[@istenno7271]

This was deep as puddle. People think these days they fart two and that is the Sound of Music.

[@jasonfanclub4267]

His wife is 🔥🔥🔥

[@HiKasandra]

The way we tell ourselves love stories matters. I think mr hussey seems like a normal guy and is a coach who is happily married. Happy for him. 😂The dating coach job seems like his passion. XO.

[@MidCenturyMikey]

So glad she finally read the memo to stop being in people's personal space.

[@saraherrick7034]

So logical, makes so much sence. Helping me on my journey, moving on. Thank you

[@valentina47734]

Thanks for teaching me the obvious!

[@skidrow1800]

Funny cause I had this happen to me except it didn’t work out. Which is fine - I’m glad it happened & I know the truth. Was texting with a guy for 4 months straight. Every single day. Then randomly got to the point where he skipped a day. Then back if became skipping another day. Then it was a few days. Then like a week. I just am not gonna play those games

[@siobhanrachel2969]

This is one of the best video, I swear

[@kkibela]

So hold up... Matthew acting like the guy he tells us to have better standards than 😂😂😂😂😂😢😂😢😂😢😂😢😂

[@brigeetalight4394]

Yep.

[@joyabia682]

That's why I don't listen to him. These people will have u running in your own head. Ugh

[@blueskies773]

You gotta watch RC Blakes, Jr.

[@niomibandara]

Yes! And she took his advice 😂😂😂

[@RachelZamstein]

Right … seems hypocritical to me.

[@1984musicman]

Love Matty and love Drew!! This is so cool to watch

[@Mushroom321-]

I LOVE THE DIFFERERENT LEVELS !!! 😊

[@serendipitytwo777]

I think it's crazy that he ghosted her, when he has so many videos about the topic....

[@orsolyabende8101]

Probably it was his way of testing her whether intentionally or not. When you should not be testing people at least not the one you feel that way for.

[@cup_o_TMarie]

I hear you & yet I don’t think two weeks is fully ghosting since they weren’t in a relationship, only very casually dating. But it was a pattern disruption & she addressed it as such. If we immediately feel someone is fully ghosting us, we may take more drastic measures ourselves rather than feeling it out. I define ghosting as someone who fully ignores your attempts at communication. After twice (because the 1st time there’s always a chance they didn’t get your msg), I’m out. Then it’s fully ghosting. At least that’s my definition.

[@Adelina24244]

Right?!?! My thought exactly. This is why I don’t always follow these relationships gurus advices because even they don’t follow what they preach smdh 😒

[@ImmanuelSaves]

Yeah it’s silly Drew and nonsense. Get a life

[@alexandraosorio1150]

Mi reacción cuando escucho a Mattew es la misma de Drew. Gracias por tanto 💕

[@xinhuagabriel1694]

that msg was what Matthew taught in one of his videos 😂

[@heyu123]

One of my fave books ever! I’m going to re-read this soon ❤

[@elenarotestan5823]

This one guy, an age mature guy, was after me. After about 6 months, I said ok, we exchanged numbers and talked all the time, including video calls, so we decided to meet. He was from another city and flew twice to come see me. Our dates went well, and in the last one, he said, "I've met my match, went back home two weeks late he was had a stopover in my city, and did not even planned to see me for an hour. That was it for me. I live 15 minutes from the airport we could have met for a drink lunch etc. The fact that he was so near me and didn't think of seeing me was a huge red flag, bye fool.

[@Supergirl-oo5lr]

She basically used the answer that you told women to send when a man ghost/ disrespect them and then decide to come back because he needs attention. I am sorry but your behavior was very poor.

[@thehealingfairee]

He talks in the book about how he used to be terrible to date, so he owns up to it

[@tasleemlaila1478]

I think you missed the point. She doesn't give the answer he advices others to use. He got it from her great example in the text she sent him. He learned from her. And he is taking pride in his wife's ability to stand up for her boundaries, and sharing this with all of us to help empower us to do the same. That makes him a more stand up and credible coach, and human in my opinion. He could have hidden his "mistake". Instead, he is admitting it to help us. That's amazing.

[@blauespony1013]

Yes, it was. But he realised it and learned from it (and hopefully changed for the better). And that is more than a lot of people do.

[@tasleemlaila1478]

@@fracaiulo6046 But he's admitting it, and has changed it, and recognized it and apologizes for it and uses the lessons from it to help him and others.

[@angelapapa410]

@@tasleemlaila1478he earns his money with his dating behaviour. It’s all business

[@kristine6996]

What a lot of words… 🌸

[@skamgodt964]

So he was running fuckboi game on her and she outsmarted him, using the tips he usually gives his audience🙄. Interesting... to say the least.

[@CRISSGRULLON]

This is the real 🫖. Good on her really!

[@KG-bliss]

She is the woman he teaches us to be... have standards, know your worth... and she did way back then...

[@alexialira3839]

She chose to marry a dude that ghosted her in the beginning of a relationship when you're supposed to be the most ecstatic/happy about a person (he essentially rejected her) and then he came back running when no other female he wanted was giving him the attention he craved. That's settling, not "being smart." I'd never do this and would never advise a loved one of mine to marry someone like this.

[@EllenNguyen]

@@alexialira3839 She wasn't ruthless enough. Being ruthless is just deleting his text and moving on

[@shastagrant7525]

Agree. I liked his content until today.

[@Mushroom321-]

So much to learn !!!!😮😮

[@hwinny2]

Good solid advice. Thank you.

[@emmaeIIe]

Love this. However, wouldn't checking for compatibility come before thinking of commitment?

[@Paula-fd6lj]

Commitment is about deciding you want to commit. Exclusivity. Compatibility is about merging lives, making sure you both want the same things.

[@janeryan2709]

You can't really confirm compatibility until the commitment is already there...

[@KG-bliss]

Commitment to the relationship not to marriage... so, compatibility comes before commitment

[@skoolie_life3261]

I agree that compatibility comes before commitment. I made the mistake of getting the two backwards and it didn’t end well. Lots of heartbreak.

[@Paula-fd6lj]

@@skoolie_life3261 you can be extremely compatible and yet the guy/girl not be ready to settle down and ull still waste time. At least if he/she is committed to the relationship u won't get cheated on/gaslighted. You'll just part ways cuz u want different things (not compatible?

[@usernumber-pg2qh]

I think Matthew Hussey has been Matthew Hussey'd

[@jasal54]

Sooooo EXCELLENT 😮

[@CatahoulaBlue-nq2ri]

Would love to see what he thinks after 30 years of marriage.

[@1CelloOne]

Wouldn’t his text that said, “ I miss you,” be considered a manipulation or tactic?

[@dumfriesspearhead7398]

Yes and his then gf called him out on that.

[@amieamie6268]

Oh my word. I love Drew! Where can I watch this show 😱😍

[@amieamie6268]

I live in Europe btw. Not American, so it's not on tv for me 😂

[@janecamilon489]

Great advice! Like the four levels of importance. Have made the mistake at level number 2.

[@verpul165]

1. What happened after that message? Pity that Drew interrupted him… pity! 2. Credits to Matt that even tho he is the “Relationship expert” and did what he did, he comes out and tell his story to “his followers and all”. It craves guts to do that, he is showing that he is a normal person, not a God (people want to see him like a God). 3. Matthew @thematthewhussey how to do when you have a relationship abroad? (Very very far away). Thank you for your openness!

[@fracaiulo6046]

Did matthew really send "i miss you" after 2 weeks of non contact? 😅

[@acemilondoner8489]

Audrey, preach us girl!

[@Dujhabanke]

The August of 2024 I met a girl, she was beautiful every ounce of her, I admired her beauty how she looked Got to know her a little bit found her even more attractive, the level 1 passed Got a feeling she liked me (never happens ever), felt how is this possible Started to make me everything perfect, not even a single day felt that it is wrong Level 2 took me to insanity, started thinking about her 24/7, how we would live together in future, how would life be like with her. I can’t sleep, can’t eat, i see her everywhere in everyone, I see her face in every girl I lay my eyes upon, my anxiety is coming back, I started having panic attacks again thinking about the future, I don’t feel happy with anyone anymore. I have started pretending I am happy, I don’t need anyone, I don’t need anything but I can’t help it. Never saw the level 3 It’s been 6 months I still think we like each other but i have a feeling she doesn’t want to commit I can’t see a yes to a relationship from her, idk I feel helpless I want her to be happy throughout her life even if it’s not with me, whoever she choose I hope he makes her happy. Idk if we will ever reach level 3 or even level 4 (I don’t think we will)

[@meadow9165]

Beautiful!

[@aurorasky1166]

I died at "Phantom Relationships"

[@myriamhernandez8015]

Wonderful points ❤

[@미미월드-q5b]

He even uses his wife as source material!😂😂

[@yzma6142]

LMFAOOO at how close drew sits to her guests

[@ss87935]

Pause. You weren't in a relationship, you were dating. Have things changed so much that dating is no longer a relationship???

[@KG-bliss]

I have always known that dating is getting to know people... not a relationship... 😂😂😂 this world

[@Lisa_M_V]

Dating is people just spending time together .. a relationship has commitment. Don’t commit before you get to know someone .. could be a mass murderer 😂

[@btsanbliss]

Good one!

[@btsanbliss]

Simple

[@writerbynite]

Attention is not Intention!

[@gargikulkarni8764]

Pause. Her expression. She changed topic😂.

[@amber_was_here]

So good.

[@AnshGupta-c7d]

In just 3 months we cleared 3 stages but probably failed on 4th one. Great experience though.

[@cococabane1]

Sounds like his wife should be a coach

[@gabrielaraimondo2430]

Matthey is a genius!❤❤❤❤ I love Drew!❤❤❤😅😅😅

[@mariabond4951]

He’s lost credibility. Matthew is a dating coach who ghosts himself. Audrey’s text implies they were “close” before he ghosted for two weeks. He could have sent Audrey a short message saying he’s taking some time to himself. He’s preaching “do as I say and not as I do”. He’s human too. But as a dating coach he needs to rise above the dating behavior he denounces. Disappointing.

[@lilibethvilella]

Here & healing from divorce? Strongly encourage you to read book “THE SUN ALWAYS PIERCES THROUGH”

[@sylviasvobodova2186]

Her text was exactly what Matthew recommends in these situations :-)))))

[@shastagrant7525]

In his past videos he has constantly provided guidance on how women can address this kind of behaviour from someone. Turned out while he did that he was engaging in exactly that kind of low value behaviour. He has nice advice, but using himself as an example here is just annoying.

[@SmileKT68]

This example is intended to spotlight HIS WIFE (not himself) and her exceptional standards, which validated exactly what he coaches women to do. He just happened to be the guinea pig in this case so to speak. He never claimed to be the exemplary guy or the perfect catch. He's always had his own demons and trauma to work on, he is now vulnerable enough to share with the public. Good for him!

[@ShadowofLyf3]

This can only work if the man has self awareness or else it won’t work.

[@shaswato]

He cooked😊😊

[@dforgr9257]

smart man :)

[@amber_was_here]

Would love to know more about compatibility

[@hipnhappenin]

I don't get why he was trying to slow fade her to begin with?

[@sanar_desde_adentro_58]

❤❤❤

[@Methequeen]

Did Matthew finally get the girl?? Congrats!!

[@headintheforest]

I would ve answered "Aww you re cute"

[@jennifertrask]

What's the end of the story?!? Is there a clip on what happened after that text from Audrey? @thematthewhussey, we need to know what happened next!

[@xxShesARebelxx]

They have a whole joint video on what happened. Search is KZbin

[@janeryan2709]

@@xxShesARebelxx They have a lot of joint videos. Can you give the title of the video where they talk about it?

[@Lisa_M_V]

They went to vegas and got married on next date 😂

[@marionenzer1947]

@@xxShesARebelxx Do you have the name of link to the video please ?

[@julia-eg2xh]

​@janeryan2709 did you find the joint video please?

[@jigggro]

Im a level 2 serial griever

[@nadjavonwolff1315]

Am I the only one who thinks that it is weird that he was already a dating coach back then even though he still did those kind of more immature things in relationships? I mean I get that you don’t need to be perfect in relationships though that’s kind of a very immature thing to do to not say anything to someone and just not giving this person attention. Especially if you want to date more. I don’t know it feels weird to me.

[@andypratt98]

Lol it’s not weird . It’s called being human 😂. Even therapist need therapy

[@nadjavonwolff1315]

@ well it is if you know a lot of people who would be better advisors than him even back then, but who never became a dating coach. And the knowledge he is not having about relationships is quite big. I mean yes therapists go to therapy but also you should have a minimum knowledge before going into a job. And maybe even be special in a lot of ways in what. I still think it is embarrassing, but maybe also because I am surrounded by a lot of extremely mature people who would never make those big mistakes in relationship and never have.

[@lifeisacelebration2138]

Where can i find its full video

[@victorkipkogei2847]

Where's the full video

[@valeriekaroline]

Ahh now I wanna know how the story continued 😄😄