Meanwhile... J.Lo's Booty Balm | Stephen Samples The Veltini

[@AbWischBar]

"You know what ..." dramatic pause ".... Huwww" 🤣🤣 That had me on the floor

[@rosetownstumpcity]

same , lol

[@autumbreeze1129]

Same. And I saw it after reading your comment, yet, despite knowing it was coming, I still laugh hard 😆

[@Omni0404]

That dramatic pause was holding back the chunks

[@rosy111]

omg same 🤣

[@Opine_Divine]

Its pronounced, "huhrrulh"

[@jeffhogue36]

Nobody throws up in their mouth funnier than Mr. Colbert. 💛

[@maggiecunningham8952]

‘Waiters who are nauseated by food’ energy

[@dinoballz]

@@maggiecunningham8952 So happy there are other people who remember tidbits like that.

[@nbuehster]

I always look forward to that whoever he talks about something disgusting. I want to know if it's always scripted, or if there were cases where it wasn't, and he was actually about to throw up.

[@cklindo4646]

I literally thought the same yesterday while washing the dishes and looking out my window.

[@minxiv7]

Sending love and prayers to Jon, his wife and their family ❤️

[@merlapittman5034]

His reaction to the Veltini is exactly the way I imagine the drink tastes. I heard about it before and my immediate reaction was "Oh, HELL, no!!!" Stephen's reaction assures me that I was not wrong. 😆😆😆

[@blackrevelproductions]

yup just the noise was the perfect "review"

[@Beegrene]

Honestly, painting miniatures together sounds like kind of a nice first date.

[@Zuraneve]

I met my partner at a D&D game. While painting minis wasn't our first date, we have had mini painting dates! And he plays Warhammer. His comment on seeing this video? "I'm in this picture and I don't like it!"

[@abhinavbharadwaj4629]

Stephan finally gets to taste a meanwhile intro 😂

[@TBJ1118]

🤣 underrated comment

[@shazayum3757]

I'm going to be laughing at this comment for the rest of the day

[@gidmalu]

But sometimes folks, just sometimes, I like to take a perfectly acceptable drink and infuse it with last night's mac&cheese inspired nightmare... Blehech! 🍸

[@The_Real_Mier]

Wishing Jon and all his loved ones the very best! Love from the Netherlands ♥️

[@crisfield4364]

Thank you Stephen for tasting one for the team. You've demonstrated that the Velvetini is as bad as I imagined.

[@Godric_71]

Stephen's lead up to the segment is HIGHLY underrated.

[@FutureCommentary1]

First time I've seen Stephen Colbert hesitate to have a drink or some food.

[@SFLiminality]

I feel like I vaguely remember him having Kraft mac and cheese ice cream as well, but maybe he just brought it up in a meanwhile sketch.

[@generalnawaki]

man I had to look up what velveeta is, I would have thrown up 100%

[@akinpaws]

Waaaay back, he and Steve Carell had a bit called "waiters nauseated by food". I recommend finding some old clips, and I think they performed some of it again when Carell was a guest on the Late Show.

[@cheeseonyomama]

"this affront to God" was snuck in there 🤣

[@Wimikk]

I was actually thinking, “Oh sure, classic first date idea to paint minis.” Then I choked on my water. Thanks, Steve.

[@henrygvidonas9573]

Someone actually made a cocktail version of Patton Oswalt's "failure pile in a sadness bowl". Unbelievable! The only thing that's missing are little bits of bacon floating in it...

[@SuperMassman]

You killed me with the popup TV next to the pool 😆😂😅🤣

[@Doopes]

The revolution joke was on point 😂

[@serendipityshopnyc]

I love Colbert's hairball noise. Every. Single. Time.

[@nbuehster]

I always look forward to that whoever he talks about something disgusting. I want to know if it's always scripted, or if there were cases where it wasn't, and he was actually about to throw up.

[@ievolcisum]

Lmao I truly think he was going to say "not that bad" before he literally threw up in his mouth

[@karacool69]

Bless you Stephen!! Standing by the Everyman! I love you!!! ♥️

[@jennifer801]

😂😂 yeah that’s exactly how I imagined that drink would taste.

[@darenstroud6254]

I can't believe he brought up old guys blow drying their balls at the gym. I had finally gotten the traumatic and horrific experiences of seeing that happen way back in 2008. Not only was he using the gyms blow dryer to bry his balls. He continued to alternate placing each leg up on the counter right next to the sink. I have not been back to a gym since. And now thanks to Stephen, that terrible image is back in my head. The Nightmares are going to start all over again. THANKS!

[@Dharmarenee]

😵

[@billyshithead3139]

Maybe it was his only opportunity to get blown?

[@odoylerules4503]

same type of degenerate that takes their shoes off on planes

[@ayejay5603]

'I have not been back to the gym since.' Lol

[@blackeyedsusan727]

I belly laughed and now I have something to laugh about forever. Definitely beats the naked old ladies in the women's locker room!

[@snchzls]

I stay up late every night just to watch this video.

[@thetvbaby83]

I watch it as soon as I can at work on the assembly line, 5:30 am.

[@Charlie-phlezk]

I'm sorry

[@henrikelanschuetzer4261]

Why don't You watch it next day on KZbin

[@rosy111]

@@henrikelanschuetzer4261 impatience

[@SHMPhotography97]

After years of satirically hocking bud light lime on his last gig, I feel the veltini is a little bit of potable karma 😂😂

[@JeffHanke]

"Potable" used loosely in this case, of course. 🤣

[@bonatoc]

Potent Potable indeed!

[@jeffl.9633]

@@JeffHanke Very loosely. So loosely that it's still trying to live-down the reputation it earned in high school.

[@lizardog]

I'm going to be THAT person and gently remind you that "hawking" is synonymous with "pitching" a product. "Hocking" is with you do with a fat "loogy" aka phlegm glob. Sorry, I know it's just the comment section, but... the more you know.

[@helengournay2377]

I read “potato”. Potato karma…is potato?

[@NickRoman]

When that Veltini description came up, I was thinking, hey, he already did his intro monologue.

[@High_Alpha]

Normally I'm right over there, crafting together the best gin money can buy and the finest dry vermouth with a lemon twist and an olive into the best martini you've ever had that is my nightly monologue. But sometimes folks, just sometimes, I get vodka that's been contaminated with Velveeta, some left over olive brine and vermouth pour it all into a cheese-rimmed martini glass I got out of a dumpster adding a cocktail pick of Velveeta-stuffed olives and Jumbo Velveeta Shells & Cheese to make the stomach churning "oh God why?" drink of doom that is my segment...

[@jojoba11]

I loved the part about when the Revolution comes haha

[@davidlundquist1979]

Well, I've never heard a single, incoherent noise so effectively sum up an entire concept before. Unless we count "D'oh!" I suppose...

[@aick]

Stephen stanning St Vincent is the perfect encapsulation of why I love his work as much as I do. Colbert is low-key ALWAYS helping out other artists and shining the spotlight on the true greats. Say what you will, he's got impeccable taste.

[@whaleymom76]

As to the Mac & cheese martini, I have never been that pregnant. And I have lots of children.

[@MrHodoAstartes]

Don't knock hobby dates. I attended the wedding of a couple who met over a game of Pathfinder.

[@phaikia13]

Reading the ingredients of the martini was bad enough, but actually drinking it... oh no...

[@rayceeya8659]

OK the boat thing is legit. Back when I was in college, it liver in an 87' Dodge Colt, I showered in the gym and passed a full year's worth of organic chemistry. Gotta love compressed summer courses. I literally spent 4hr a day in lecture. Banged out a year of O-chem in a little over three months. Spent the rest of my day sleeping wherever. Used to carry a wrist watch around with an alarm. I can't wear it on my wrist because of a nickel allergy. Me an Tommy (the wrist watch) made it anyway.

[@thisbushnell2012]

the first three years of our pizza business, we slept in the empty segment of the building that held our shop, and showered at the Y's pool facility.

[@LaMortDeLaMusique]

Even Stephen knows the revolution is coming

[@geoffcarroll05]

I do have some 40k figures to paint, any ladies feeling like base coating and chillin

[@courtney5796]

Next to Choco Taco playing Raft, this is my favorite. edit: If I am renting a boat for $600 a month to live in. I am "showering" port side.

[@valeriesuttonpayne7413]

Oh I didn’t know she was ill again. They are such a beautiful couple.

[@MaryAnnNytowl]

Really great to be able to actually grin, even smile, at something. Stephen, you and your writers do that for me, and I thank you so much for that... for part of it. But I had to pause it and skip ahead over one bit. The "given up on this marriage" bit, though, was so painful, I broke out into tears. My soon-to-be ex did that to me (minus the NFL, plus the divorce papers) at 38½ years of marriage, and it's been 21 months (and 16 days, but who's counting?) since he abandoned me out of the blue, but I still cry every damned day.

[@joshuahutchings558]

Oh no I'm sorry that happened.

[@cathyemberson8402]

Thanks for the update. I was wondering. Best wishes to Jon and family.

[@jeffdaniels7195]

I love the fact that he is willing to try congruent anything that they play in front of but his reaction is amazing

[@bonniehall3428]

No alcohol dating is a good idea. So many things go wrong starting in a bar. Drink at home and save lives.

[@cindygentry6821]

Stephen colbert ROCKS!! Watch him every nite

[@tania2897]

The Veltini consumption made me hoot.

[@90evilideas]

6:03 I love it. You know he has a joke lined up, but he knows it couldn't overshadow that spontaneous velveeta burp, so he just cuts to commercial. That's a pro for you. 😆

[@janemariesinger6779]

sending you much love Jon and family...you are my shining star...i miss you and understand

[@JohnDoe662002]

The fact that Steve said "Painting Warcraft miniatures" let's me know that D&D, Warmachine, and Warhammer were not willing to pony up money for a joke advert. Although .... painting can be a nice activity to bond with a prospective partner. Sharing knowledge of a hobby, discussing favorite colors/palettes/patterns, and displaying different painting techniques. And when you finish you have a nice little memento of the date. Recommend sticking to simple minis that don't have a lot of different textures (animals, skeletons, etc). Now if only I could meet a woman that would help me build d&d dungeon tiles ...

[@derekstein6193]

"Now if only I could meet a woman that would help me build d&d dungeon tiles..." You and me both, buddy. You and me both.

[@martinrehm3731]

The figurines are from Warhammer 😁

[@lazyperfectionist1]

5:58 😄 Oh, Stephen, the things you do for this _job._ 😄

[@ileaird]

Mad respect To trying that Velvetola 😂, we shall be right back… with a glass of water please 😂😂😂

[@joesdi]

Carell, where are you? 🤣

[@onetrick.pony1]

The Veltini description sounded like a Meanwhile intro ;)

[@phasm42]

"Shower at a nearby gym" - ha, I did that when I was young and poor and living at my job 😅

[@mattyoder6498]

BEST FUCKING MEANWHILE EVER! THE VELTINI BIT WAS 😂😂😂.. 💀

[@maartentoors]

5:23 It really is. HHUGH... 0_o

[@jimnasium452]

A cheese drip usually requires a penicillin shot. Clears right up.

[@Shicksalblume]

The Veltini makes me glad I quit drinking. Even with my love of the weirdest things I can find, I wouldn't touch that with a 10-foot barge pole even before I quit.

[@p.b.2286]

Shouldn't a million dollar TV be waterproof 🤔

[@nbuehster]

6:08 I was waiting for that. LMFAO Did he actually drink it, or just put it up to his face, like he was going to drink it?

[@scapegoatiscariot2767]

This is the best show on television.

[@Lulzswag]

Who in the hell came up with that sales pitch thinking it was good? "Hey guys, let's put Velveeta cheese in an alcoholic drink and also some pasta." da fuq?

[@Alresu]

You know your drink's a bad idea when Stephen Colbert hesitates to drink it.

[@krisfrederick5001]

I always wonder where he's going to wake up...Generally I have my Velveeta shells and cheese AFTER the alcohol. Not during 👀

[@Qroxta]

"You know what.... hurghk"

[@KweenRegi77]

I could see a moment pass that he seemed to think "God please don't let this make me vomit on national tv🥂🍷🍹🍻

[@Becky_Cal]

“The most economical way to let your spouse know, I’ve given up on this marriage…” 🤣🤣🤣

[@WillRennar]

**sip** "... ...Y'know what?" *_*HURK*_*

[@PandoraNYC1]

Stephen, that YOU know about Warcraft figurines IS TELLING! Also, For the Alliance!

[@rgnestle]

The whole thing came together with, "Hurooop!"

[@CLYMA1.5CHAINZ]

Hope you're doin well, John 💙

[@ievolcisum]

I hope he's doing well too. His family as well. 🥰

[@cab5917]

Sometimes there are just NO WORDS! Burp.

[@LALew850]

I felt that blech! Yuuuuck veltini hurl!

[@edwardfletcher7790]

First time I've seen Steven go "HERRPH" damnnnn !

[@justhearmeout3959]

Stephen: Most economical way to tell your spouse you've given up- Me: Baby you're gonna love this, NFL is streaming now!

[@henrygalliher6574]

2:25. I'm really sorry you all had to see that.

[@anneplowman9034]

5:55- I've never clicked off of a video so fast. 🤣

[@iancowan3527]

A man that does he's own stunts!

[@High_Alpha]

"The Veltini"... more like "The Regret".

[@justinsullivan1285]

The joke about the 30million$ mansion with the sliding big screen tv in the Hamptons was spot on. Judging by his reaction, he wasn't crazy about the veltini.

[@embreis2257]

if you wanna know if a country has collectively lost its marbles, look at the drinks, desserts and other fancy foodstuff they create.

[@vmwindustries]

People can't clap at someone that has worked hard to have a very healthy body! WTF is happening to the world. Healthy is something we should all strive for and appreciate! Good for Jennifer, and her hard work!

[@OMentertainment]

I can hear Henry Cavill screaming "It's called Warhammer!"

[@astarianaira6968]

Who paints Warcraft figurines?! *swipes left* Now...Warhammer minis? *swipes right*

[@robertplatt1693]

I definitely considered that sailboat. Absolutely. At $600 I could get two different gym memberships for variety.

[@Magnavox-1972]

Colbert tried a Veltini? That’s more nauseating than watching someone drink a Bud Lite Lime. Ya hear that, John Oliver? You’ve been outdone.

[@cathymaher6286]

Should have a warning sign there Stephen lmao

[@Dave_Meyers]

"I want my gum back." -the hobo

[@TheHiredGun187]

@0:56 Evie comes from back stage to shut that down with The Evil Eye Only a Wife can give

[@HeatherVT8]

Not me going on first date today for coffee 😆

[@lexslate2476]

The Veltini: Even gin doesn't deserve this!

[@Sina-aka-potatosupreme]

OMG. Give me someone who paints Warcraft figurines. My pants drop faster than an instant spell.

[@alden1132]

Stephen is getting funnier and funnier as time goes by! I laughed out loud, imagine someone that paints Warcraft figurines DATING! I'm gonna a lose it!

[@con.troller4183]

The Meanwhile Preamble budget has been slashed.

[@williamgalaini7005]

WarHAMMER. Oh God, I'm a nerd.

[@cmdraftbrn]

that's not a drink. that's an abomination calling itself a drink!

[@Moekoffee2001]

Keep an eye out in case Steve decides to throw a long balm

[@ShamelessFox]

DON'T DO IT STEPHEN!

[@rdnax92]

Mac & cheese Martini....?! 😱

[@sherrillwhately7586]

Stephen, it sounds like your fantasies of the future are as dark as mine.

[@COMPFUNK2]

St. Vincent kicks ass.

[@rev.buttons2482]

Oh, Stephen, dear, don´t do it, don´t do it... He did.

[@liamnehren1054]

The wall for the revolution part wasn't a joke.

[@deecohen1383]

Does anyone remember how short and long it was ago when we were watching “quarantinewhile”

[@cordelyahaynes523]

🌞thanks for the update

[@SaintBenard]

Love love love love love Saint Vincent