Men Can’t Write Women

We've established pretty well that a lot of men cannot write women characters, and this is just more evidence.
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[@jeremyblade7561]

I would be outraged about this writing, but as a man, I have no breasts to convey my emotions.

[@tjenadonn6158]

Breasts are the windows to the soul.

[@loafofdread4329]

@@tjenadonn6158 Nay, For they are the key to the heart

[@isabelstockton6106]

I'd lend you mine but they got depressed, withdrew themselves and now I can't find them, sorry

[@auldthymer]

@@isabelstockton6106 lol

[@BeautyMonster1000]

That's what balls are for. 🤣

[@RPGLover87]

A trans masc friend of mine often told me that before their surgery, they only had to feel depressed and their breasts would just retreat into their chest. They never needed a binder due to this lifehack.

[@EdelweissConfederacy]

Where do I sign up for retreating breasts? I tried being depressed, but it's not working.

[@thisisnotacreativename1741]

I'm not trans, but I want to chop off my breasts cuz they make me uncomfortable, but being depressed doesn't work, any other life hacks you can recommend?

[@loafofdread4329]

@@thisisnotacreativename1741 Hm, well, this worked for me... Tell them "I hope you fall down harder than a grandma on stairs"

[@loafofdread4329]

@@thisisnotacreativename1741 That should do the trick

[@poisonedkilljoy9304]

sorry, how do i get this upgrade? by nonbinary gender-fluctuating self could really do with that. did it also come with them inflating when happy?

[@mrherc85]

The "depressed breasts" part made me think that the writer was actually thinking of a certain part of the male anatomy that shrinks in the cold, "retreating into themselves"...

[@RiveroftheWither]

Crest fallen chesticles, moody mammaries, begrudged bosoms, morose melons, upset udders. Its a missed opportunity to not make it an alliteration, of you're going to write something ridiculous, go all out!

[@tjenadonn6158]

@@RiveroftheWither Pull an inverse Monty Python and say her nipples imploded with despair.

[@poisonedkilljoy9304]

@@RiveroftheWither i kinda like the sound of meloncholy melons

[@loafofdread4329]

​@@poisonedkilljoy9304 Oh lords, i have two

[@moonlighthowling666]

I mean we call them breasticles for that reason, right? Lmao

[@unapologeticallylizzy]

"Masculine attention from a very masculine male" gives me the same energy as straight Holt from Brooklyn 99. "She was such a strong, female woman with nice, heavy breasts."

[@iantaakalla8180]

I guess to extend the metaphor, it sounds like a person who either knows nothing about male people or is a closeted lesbian trying to be straight?

[@xd._.28234]

female woman is redundant as hell, my god lmao

[@schneefall3935]

Omg yes! It also feels like a self insert/"y/n" for men kinda thing😭

[@JDMimeTHEFIRST]

It’s true. . None of these men have seen a woman naked (except their moms)

[@clownmonomaniac2630]

also it was written by a woman

[@cerberaodollam]

"made her poverty endearing rather than repulsive" - I'm sorry, WTF?!

[@tjenadonn6158]

Capitalism is a disease.

[@HumbleWooper]

And how can a stranger tell the difference between secondhand clothes and ones you've simply kept long enough to start showing some wear? Were the handwritten-in-sharpie price tags still on them?

[@lauraelliott6909]

Aww, she's poor. How cute! Eww, that other person is poor. Gross! Both attitudes are disgusting and also nonsensical.

[@naluzoniro]

The working class written badly

[@cerberaodollam]

@@HumbleWooper good point. With my sensitive skin, I tend to wear stuff to rags because I never know when can I find a replacement that doesn't itch lol

[@ashe1317]

can you imagine a man being described thusly? "he was not a well-maintained man, such as would have rippling muscles that glistened in the sun like glazed hams. no, he was the sloppy and slovenly sort, the kind no woman wished to look upon, with an undulating gut of rising dough and floppy, soft pectorals that sagged sadly upon his chest-- unless he was given to moments of anger or alarm, in which case they rose and fell with the same relentless rhythm of the tides, as beholden to the whims of his emotions as the ocean is to the moon." yeaaaaah, that sounds straight-up stupid, doesn't it. and yet people get this shit published... 🙄

[@loafofdread4329]

Bro, imagine a block of cheese being described this way

[@spoon3413]

That was very poetic.

[@AnkhAnanku]

I absolutely disagree. That was a joy to read. Mission failed successfully.

[@CelestialBunnyPaws]

I once described someone's lecherous boss in a story as a slab of meat, and other such unsavoury terms. 👀

[@humanthing5709]

I would read the HELL out of a book made like this just to be funny

[@Sunari]

Once when mum realized a guy was watching her eat a banana intently she took a savage and harsh bite, and with a cackle told me how he'd visibly winced at the action.

[@Hypatia52]

As a cis woman of 60+ years, I can tell you that is exactly how I heard guys talk about me in junior high (12 to 16 years old) & high school. And there was no one in my school who would be considered obese by today's standard. I'm not quite 5' 2" and I weighed 136 lbs. Yep, that's how bad they were when I was growing up. Charming.

[@beth7935]

Cis woman 40+, same- things haven't changed. I'm 5'1" & I was 108-119 pounds in highschool (age 11-16), but the guys had me convinced I was seriously fat. Reading "The Beauty Myth" aged 19 TOTALLY changed my perspective on all that bs tho. It's VERY hard to imagine a young woman today reading a feminist book from the 90s, but I wish I could make them! (Women's Studies at uni was the bomb too- no wonder sexist men hate educated women, lol)

[@Hypatia52]

@@beth7935 I was told in the 90s by a cis-woman that the need of feminism was over, We were holdovers from a bygone era and needed to sit down & shut up. Good thing for her she lives in England and doesn't have to deal with overturning of Roe V. Wade.

[@PokhrajRoy.]

“Tolerably pretty?” Who wrote this, Mr. Darcy?

[@ronjaj.addams-ramstedt1023]

I had the same association immediately!

[@kiarona.]

Literally my first thought!!!

[@ravenwolfkittyface1802]

Be intolerably pretty. Beautiful and terrible as the Morning and the Night. Fair as the Sea and the Sun and the Snow upon the Mountain. Dreadful as the Storm and the Lightning. Stronger than the foundations of the earth. All shall love you and despair.

[@SanjayMerchant]

The bit about Brenda and Jasmine seems to also carry the implication that they wouldn't have so many children if they weren't overweight. Like, does that author think children just spontaneously generate or something (since he's clearly convinced there's no way they could've gotten laid)? Or is the intended implication that fat people are too stupid to use birth control? Cause it doesn't sound like we're meant to think they're happy that they have a lot of kids, but that kids are something bad that happened to them because they're not the author's idea of hot. It's just a very... weird vibe.

[@Valentina-mv2ux]

i think it's painting them as promiscuous and neglectful of the children they have to make them more hateable characters god forbid two plus size women try to enjoy life 🙄 (of course i don't condone leaving the children at home screaming with no one to look after them, but obviously this was yet another detail put in by the author so that we would hate them just as much as he does, rather than an attempt at writing flawed mother characters, which i have nothing against)

[@MsFitz134]

They're repulsive to men and yet have lots of children... 🤔 Very good point

[@John_Weiss]

That entire thing is soaked in misogyny and oozing incel vibes. 🤢🤢🤮

[@thebadpoet]

I’m a fat cis woman, and there is a stereotype that fat women are “easy” or desperate because men won’t want to be in public or long term relationships with them. Lots of one night stands= kids according to this absolute goober of an author. I happen to be asexual myself and was never into the bar or nightclub scene but I’ve encountered the stereotype anyway. Like the man who followed me for five blocks getting more and more insistent and graphic about how he liked my body and I should have sex with him. (If that happens to anyone else be savvier than I was and duck into a store or strike up a conversation with a random passerby. I just walked faster and ignored him until he gave up.)

[@gabriellar4189]

As a fat woman, that one literally had me pause the video to process my feelings for a while, it hit me like a fucking truck and it hurt. I hate how society talks about us, and I hate having to be reminded so often that I don't have the right to feel deserving of love. Just a rant, sorry. It's was a hard one to cope with.

[@SanjayMerchant]

That last one is like "This guy, who's totally not an author self-insert why do you ask, is a super duper macho man, the manliest man who ever manned."

[@PokhrajRoy.]

Quote of the Day: “You are not owed erotic banana eating.”

[@tjenadonn6158]

It is really hard to eat anything erotically, and there are some foods that are just impossible to eat erotically. I'll bet all three of my kidneys that nobody has ever eaten soup erotically.

[@MsFitz134]

I want this on some merch

[@michanone]

Now I want a hamburger. Really, just to sit down and eat it in front of men that think women only eat in an erotic way. 😆

[@MsFitz134]

@@michanone have you seen the older Carl's Jr hamburger commercials? They'd have "sexy" women eat messy hamburgers with sauce dripping everywhere, usually on a sports car or something. They definitely made women eating hamburgers erotic. And then apologized for it years later in a very creative way.

[@michanone]

@@MsFitz134 😳 ow, no. They really try everything, don't they? Well, good thing they apologized, though.

[@gabbie3480]

if my breasts were to show emotion, I’d have been in therapy by now 💀

[@EdelweissConfederacy]

I would be in a pyshc ward for a long time since I'm already in therapy

[@Lazylin]

Omg, this comment just made me laugh so hard 🤣🤣 Very relatable.

[@Kiks-ii3uu]

I know that this is a joke but if you feel like you might be in need of therapy, go give it a try. You deserve to be happy.

[@gabbie3480]

@@Kiks-ii3uu Thank you so much for your concern. I have actually been in therapy, but I am currently on a waiting list to see a therapist again, so don’t worry!

[@bearo8]

If my breast were able to show my emotions I'd have one less reason for therapy

[@katie6731]

Here's the rest of that quote that Jamie was wondering about: "Suddenly she remembered reading somewhere that motherly women with large breasts were often attracted to clumsy, untidy men, and she became conscious of her own breasts straining in their harness under her blouse." pg 15 of _Honeymoon to Nowhere_ by Akimitsu Takagi Here's another sentence from the same page: "He possessed a kind of natural warmth that made her pores open up to him." 😆 Without reading too much, it seems that a woman was meeting a man at a concert, and he showed up late and somewhat disheveled. In these quotes, she's looking at him and comparing him to a couple of other men. The book is available to read for free on Google, which is how I found the section in question. 💙

[@lauraanderson8785]

Good god that was a pain to read (not your comment, his shitty writing I mean). This is a part of the reason I prefer female writers, they don't obsess over their male characters' bodies so the reading experience doesn't get ruined. That writer is probably a clumsy and untidy man so he's projecting his wishful thinking into his book...

[@vampyrekyng_lex]

@@lauraanderson8785 There are definitely female writers that write men (and women) poorly, but the majority I’ve seen are far better than men writing just about anything.

[@kill_kakey4585]

@@lauraanderson8785

[@katie6731]

@@lauraanderson8785 It was so painful to read that I barely skimmed the page to figure out the context of the quote Jamie read. I don't enjoy feeling second-hand embarrassment for the author while reading. 😬

[@lindan.137]

I just KNEW, I was sure that the next words on that next page would be about her breasts

[@tzisorey]

"She pulled the shawl around herself tightly, her flannel nightgown insufficient, as the chill seemed to penetrate further in her advanced years. An aged finger explored the wrinkles on her once youthful face - her once brilliant auburn hair fading with time. This was it, she told herself. Finally reaching the age of 21, and she was practically dead"

[@ShinTriAce]

I wish my breasts could completely draw into themselves permanently (preferably depression not required)

[@cedar.twig.4]

lmao same here

[@platypusdara]

I feel that 🥲

[@humanthing5709]

While I do not normally feel this way, I currently wish I could chop mine off due to how sore they are.

[@tinkeramma]

I'd like that at least while wearing a seatbelt.

[@JhericFury]

"I know there a tense gun fight, but what were her breasts doing at the time?" I assume this what the average editor comments based on what books get published.

[@RPGLover87]

They were going on a picnic. What else?

[@loafofdread4329]

@@RPGLover87 Obviously, i mean, what else would they be doing? Filing a restraining order against the guy?

[@Klutz_Krafts]

they had their own guns and they began shooting, falling backwards from the pressure. they were never seen again

[@FrozEnbyWolf150]

I'm an editor who is also nonbinary, and this is precisely the kind of thing I would yell at an author for focusing on if their manuscript crossed my desk.

[@JhericFury]

@@FrozEnbyWolf150 thank you for your service, I'm sure you're not taking requests, but as an ace, unnecessarily shoe horned romance subplots deserve yelling at too.

[@InThisEssayIWill...]

I've been reading harry Potter to my kid (for many reasons, none of which are a love of jk Rowling herself) and what really surprised me the most (since my first and only read of the series was a decade ago ) was noticing how many times she uses fat as a shorthand for evil.

[@noaccount2494]

The entire series has fat and ugly being shorthands for being evil. She put a lot of racism into basically everything from the goblins, to the house elves, to Cho Chang, Nagini, Patil twins, Seamus and a lot more. Plus Rita Skeeter is an example of her transphobia in the writing also. Not to mention the weird amount of normalized child abuse and fascism. There's a lot of other book series without these issues that are quite magical and good for kids if you'd like some recommendations

[@sarahwithanh4272]

Haven’t read Harry Potter in a while, that’s interesting. Not good or right, but interesting.

[@tjenadonn6158]

Yeah, even if it wasn't for for transphobia stuff Joey would still be problematic AF. Granted her becoming the public face of radicalized transphobia has practically made it such that she's stolen H. P. Lovecraft's title of Most Problematic Fantasy Author of All Time, bit even without it she'd still be easily in the top ten.

[@sarahwithanh4272]

@@tjenadonn6158 it’s too bad because I really liked Harry Potter, it was a huge letdown to know that the author wasn’t a good person.

[@NitroIndigo]

@@noaccount2494 Where was the normalised child abuse and fascism? I'm not trying to defend JK, this is a legitimate question.

[@FinleyHills]

Can you imagine if women authors did the same to men?! "He growled in frustration, his masculine voice seeping with testosterone-fuelled rage, his penis flopping angrily into the left leg of his trousers."

[@bearo8]

His normally big bizeps deflated, shrinking to the size of a grape, in the face of her dominating behaviour.

[@theangryholmesian4556]

Allow me to introduce you to bodice rippers and Omegaverse...

[@MightyCaesar37]

My favorite side effect of the internet making it easier for organized mocking of these terrible bits of literature is people finding it funny, intentionally writing some parody of it for people to laugh at, and then later discovering someone un-ironically wrote almost the same thing previously or afterwards.

[@tjenadonn6158]

Satire is dead, and we have killed it.

[@ReannaRiddle]

The banana eating is from Neil gaimans ‘Neverwhere’ and in full context I think it’s done to clarify the non sexual ness of situation but does sound super weird in isolation 😅

[@dilynnrandolph7028]

Neverwhere is brilliant, it's very much like Alice In Wonderland but underscores the notion that anyone from any walk of life can "fall down the rabbit hole" if they interact with a "glitch in the Matrix," which is all very much like how most people are only a couple missed paychecks away from being homeless and ignored by the majority of society.... These stories are embedded in the human collective subconscious and keep being retold and retold but most people only see them as entertainment. I wrote a story when I was about 3-5 years old (I was a very advanced reader/writer as a kid way back the 1980s) that was the same basic story as Gaiman's Coraline, about the other version of my family that I could get to through a secret door under the stairs in our front entryway. It was all metaphor, I was describing how I used to hide under the stairs or in closets or other tight dark spaces to hide in an imaginary world when my mom got blackout drunk and violent at night.

[@ReannaRiddle]

@@dilynnrandolph7028 I too was an advanced reader, in my safe world the me stuck with my family was an alien and the real me was off in space having adventures. I empathise with your story and I’m glad you found some comfort in the world of stories. Neverwhere is the first gaiman story I’ve gotten around to reading and I started it when I was travelling on the tube through London on the way to visit my family for the first time in 4 years. The world building was excellent.

[@RiveroftheWither]

It's asexual awareness week. I am here. Be aware of me.

[@loafofdread4329]

Us-

[@thisisnotacreativename1741]

Next year on asexual awareness week, shall we execute our plan on invading Denmark? Or shall we do it on another day so people aren't aware that we exist. Fellow Asexuals, the garlic bread will soon be ours

[@loafofdread4329]

@OddAce Same here, asexual comrade

[@stephanienoire1892]

hi! you're valid! keep being you!

[@loafofdread4329]

@@stephanienoire1892 I mean, i can't be Chris Hemsworth, sooooooooo

[@meaganbailey5672]

"You are not owed erotic banana eating" is going to live rent-free in my head from now on

[@DanielledeVreede]

Damn, Christmas really is creeping up on us! Also, I feel like the "misogynistic man" author is just turning his own online comments into compliments to feel better

[@PokhrajRoy.]

Men describing the Physics of a Female Character walking from her POV: “My Belly don’t jiggle jiggle because I have unrealistic body proportions.”

[@tjenadonn6158]

My belly don't jiggle jiggle, it folds.

[@FaithTheFallen]

@@tjenadonn6158 it is convenient for travel and makes clothes shopping so much easier!

[@R1ptide_Drag0n]

Got them anime proportions

[@properantagonist]

It's really disgusting how the one thing this always comes back to is that men don't see women as having any value as a human when they stop being attracted to them. It's not even about general societal standards, it's mostly about what the author himself considers attractive. And all people, including men, women and everyone else, can be totally considered universally attractive if they don't follow every single standard. They can also be considered attractive by a smaller group of people than the conventional standard and that doesn't mean they're ugly. But to limit someone's entire worth to them being fuckable is just to stupid. Because a woman can't apparently present any qualities outside of external beauty. Also, about the fragment with fat women that have a lot of children... How come so many men tend to only see women as useful when they can have children, but as soon as they do they immediately become worthless? Do they really think that a women live for that one night when they have intercourse for the first time, get impregnated and immediately become useless? The more I analyse this the more dehumanising it looks.

[@tinkeramma]

Well, no. Someone has to tend the children, after all.

[@properantagonist]

@@tinkeramma but why women, lol? Why not men? Do you doubt men's ability to father?

[@tinkeramma]

@@properantagonist Sarcasm and misogyny.

[@properantagonist]

@@tinkeramma I'm sorry I can't read sarcasm in text, lol. I'm autistic. Gimme a break

[@tinkeramma]

@@properantagonist It wasn't an attack. Apologies for not using a /s tag.

[@kiku-goldenflower7731]

My theory for why male writers so often endow breasts with emotions is that they spend so much time staring at them and subconsciously picking up on the woman's body language that they started projecting the perceived emotions onto the breasts like a second face.

[@anna_in_aotearoa3166]

... probably because they spent more time looking at chests than actual faces? 🤪

[@kiku-goldenflower7731]

@@anna_in_aotearoa3166 that's the joke

[@greyskies5094]

Men like this just don’t deserve to write. On a happier note, enjoy your videos Jamie :) You and One Topic remind me there’s decent men somewhere in the world

[@NintyPikachu]

These men clearly don't know what the experience of being a woman is like, and just make misogynistic assumptions... Edit: Massive unwanted war down in the reply section... :(

[@lahdedah3945]

@@lawrence208 A person that identifies as a woman (typically, not always, living their life as a woman).

[@lahdedah3945]

@@lawrence208 Identify is a verb meaning "establish or indicate who or what (someone or something) is." If you identify as something, you are saying that you ARE that thing, and that you hope that people will respect you as what you identify as. In the dictionary, a woman is defined as "an adult female human being." That is also what I believe a woman to be. I can clarify something I said if you need me to.

[@Atlas_Quin]

There is no actual way to define a woman because it is a made up concept. Man and woman are just made up so there’s no specific structure/standards of what a woman is other than an adult human who identifies as a woman.

[@lys1065]

@@lawrence208 A woman is this group of majestic beings that despite all being drastically different in mind and body, all agree you're not worth their time 😁

[@lys1065]

@@lawrence208 i have a vagina im pretty sure im aware of what a woman is.....

[@Ravensky]

Ooooh that explains why I've had no breasts prior to coming out as Trans. They 'retreated into themselves' from my depression. That explains everything! *looks down* must not be happy enough yet, they haven't blown back up yet 🤣

[@tjenadonn6158]

Explain transfemmes with gynecomastia then. My boobs have gone through this strange psycho-phsysiological metamorphosis/recontextualization where they started out as man-boobs that I wanted to get rid of, but later have become unhyphenated boobs that I wish were bigger as I've realized that they're not attached to a man. I honestly wonder how many transfemmes have had top surgery to resolve gynecomastia before they realized that it was a case of biological foreshadowing.

[@Eagle_Owl2]

looking at my flat chest as a non-depressed, cis-woman: "well, I'm waiting!"

[@electronics-girl]

@@tjenadonn6158 I often wondered, "Why don't I get these removed?" but I think my subconscious knew I was a woman all along and stopped me from doing it.

[@MrARock001]

"You are not owed erotic banana-eating." -Jamie

[@sadsalamander9505]

I think the worst part of whatever the heck was going on with the banana one is that, like Jamie said, the woman seemed to be very hungry. And the fact that the man had just introduced himself makes me think that he might have found her lost somewhere or she might've been homeless (?) and all this dude is thinking about is that she isn't eating "sexily."

[@Sophie_Cleverly]

Yeah it's from Neverwhere, one of my all time favourite books but I always thought that was a weird line lol. Richard is a bit strange and a bit of a jerk at the beginning so maybe it's just his POV. Neil Gaiman definitely has lots of brilliantly written female characters outside of the strange banana line 😂

[@PokhrajRoy.]

7:58 As someone with semi-developed man bosoms, I take offence to this. I can emote AND heave lmao

[@Quit1006]

5:33 I wish my b00bs would go away when I’m depressed. As a depressed trans guy (with no surgeries) myself I actually wish that that description was possible. I’m jealous of that character-

[@PokhrajRoy.]

Men Writing Women be like: “Why should fat women have any woman? Or personality?”

[@PokhrajRoy.]

Your cozy cardigan is cute and I do not understand people who would judge you for wearing one 2 months from Christmas.

[@Dragon4Gaze]

The more I watch your videos, the more convinced I am that you look like what Harry Potter would have if Sirius was allowed to raise him and I am 100% here for it.

[@momamiandkiddokelsi9027]

Daily reminder! ❤🧡💛💚💙💜 You are valid and amazing just the way you are!! ❤🧡💛💚💙💜

[@FernLake]

We need more pride emojis Sure you make this emoji 🇷🇪 but not the updated LGBTQ+

[@EdelweissConfederacy]

Reminder! ❤🧡💛💚💙💜You are valid too you amazing human! Thank you for spreading kind messages to others, you cheered me up!❤🧡💛💚💙💜

[@youtubeuniversity3638]

henlo

[@squeaktheswan2007]

Thanks, you too.

[@loafofdread4329]

As a trans man myself i 100% Would trust Jamie with my drink

[@unapologeticallylizzy]

Jamie: When she'd stopped crying, Madeleine- Me, having seen this one before: OH NO, NOT MADELEINE

[@kiarona.]

Yes - the Madeleine one has gotten around a bit hasn't it!

[@KimmietheAunt]

Jamie, the image you inspired of the woman deliberately shaking her breasts with each step had me rolling!! 😂😂😂 As always, this topic is so loaded with stupidity, and amazes me how many men truly think that women care as much about their breasts as men do about their penises. Fact: a great majority of the time, breasts are simply there; either too small, too big, wonderful at catching food spills when eating ( quick insert: this is all written with extreme SARCASM). However, most women do not measure their worth by their breast size; neither do we sit around taking off our bras, comparing sizes. Our breasts do not deflate when we are depressed, as they are not filled with air, helium, or relocatable fat deposits. Testicles can "retract" in a manner of speaking due to temperature extreme or severe injury; breasts do not have this capability - we carry them on the front of our bodies and that's where they stay, regardless of depression, humiliation, or exhaustion. If they sag, it is due to muscle weakness. End of story.

[@thou_dog]

You're a world cultural treasure, sir, thank you for the giggles and for the social commentary.

[@Bar3ly_Human]

Amazing! Love your videos Jamie! Love from a trans guy 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️💙💙✨✨🌈🌈

[@PokhrajRoy.]

9:30 In today’s episode of ‘Women are compared to objects’, we have…OVERWORKED FRENCH PASTRY!

[@EdelweissConfederacy]

I never thought I would hear that one

[@geostorm06]

What's the scariest thing in the world. Men writing women.

[@PokhrajRoy.]

Alternatively: Tell me a Horror Story in 3 Words

[@astridposey]

No. A transphobe writing trans women.

[@tjenadonn6158]

@@PokhrajRoy. Matt Walsh's Daycare.

[@PokhrajRoy.]

@@tjenadonn6158 HAHAHA

[@loafofdread4329]

@@PokhrajRoy. Even better, Stubbing a toe

[@dcornect53]

"You are NOT owed erotic banana eating." Exactly, erotic banana eating is EARNED. Lmfao

[@talistheintrovert]

obsessed with the idea that my boobs could shrink if i was depressed, i would be flat-chested every day of the year dsflghdfkghkjd

[@rocketpsyence]

Always love these periodic reminders that nothing I write will ever be as bad as these

[@CelestialBunnyPaws]

I feel like the man writing about Brenda and her friend got turned down by a curvy woman in real life and is now eating the sourest of grapes.

[@reesah.3020]

It's a Stephen King short story, and it's fucking awful. I highly recommend NOT looking it up.

[@CelestialBunnyPaws]

@@reesah.3020 Ah, so he writes more than one type of horror.

[@thatonefucking_idiot]

"Depressed breasts" -Jammie 2022

[@thatonefucking_idiot]

@OddAce Thank you

[@squeaktheswan2007]

Your username is amazing. And so is your icon.

[@thatonefucking_idiot]

@@squeaktheswan2007 Consdering the fact that this is pretty much the highlight of my day --er-- night I really apperacte it

[@squeaktheswan2007]

@@thatonefucking_idiot No problem. I had a rough day so this is the highlight of mine.

[@Toni-lo9ms]

5:28 it should be a requirement for writing women to have actually interacted with one or two in your entire life. The writer in this bit clearly hasn't.

[@HelenNERD]

This reminds me of a friend from college who used to say that they couldn’t eat thinks like bananas or lollies in public since they were “very private foods” hahahahahahha

[@EternalYorkieMom]

I’m in my late 20’s and the girlishness is mostly gone. But going from a soprano part to an alto part is actually really freeing based off of what I’ve heard from women over 30

[@TarisLuna]

If you ever feel discomfort from other people looking while eating a banana: peel back your lips and go teeth first with teeth on full display. Make em uncomfortable too. If any of them where thinking about bjs they now think of something very painful.

[@squeaktheswan2007]

I just choose to make direct eye contact and growl, but ok.

[@tjenadonn6158]

Bite into it sideways.

[@John_Weiss]

Drag your teeth across it, then bite the tip.

[@AskForDoodles]

Yeah I never understood why banana eating is supposed to be sexy, since you're not sucking it, you're clearly BITING IT off in chunks. I always make sure to HARD VORE my bananas so men are properly warned of the RISK of that fantasy >:)

[@chelonianmobile]

Bananas are mushy, squish them before eating.

[@jonnien6006]

I think this is why I saw mentions on Uglies on Tumblr about How Scott Westerfield never who never wrote about the characters breasts. I'm rereading them I only ever read the first series myself soo take that as you will. Either way, I think the closest he come to it in two books is that Shay was warm and soft for Tally to sleep against as the two girls were sleeping in a cave, with the rest of the smokies meaning that Shay was more like a comforting bed then a sex object.

[@RedXiongmao]

Ever since I turned 32, I have thanked my lucky stars every day that I'm too old for these jagoffs

[@koalaskrypin]

I love how this affirmed my transness. 😂 I was reading along with you on the mirror-one and thinking of myself in the mirror and then it said "not the girl she once was" and I was drawn back and became completely aware of the fact that I had just thought of myself in the mirror as male. 😅

[@metheyee1247]

The one about the guy wanting to touch the woman's hair immediately gave me inspiration for a story written with those kinds of awful descriptions. It can be framed like a romance novel. The man is pretty creepy but, in a complete subversion of expectations, instead of being into him (like you see in stories a lot), The woman sends him to jail. Where he belongs. If only I could bring myself to write in that style so I could make it. Or on second thought I really, really don't ever want to write that way. Not even on purpose.

[@elijahrock3914]

i want to see an episode just called "Are YOU ok?" and its not lgbtq+ or gender related its just really messed up people

[@elaexplorer]

In my early twenties I read a romance novel, one of those ones you get from those book clubs. The chapter where the two meet, the guy is a small town sheriff and the woman's car has broken down or something. It's told from the guy's perspective and it says something to the lines that the guy was repulsed by her, going so far as gagging, because she hadn't bathed in a few days and her hair was greasy. It's been almost 30 years I just can't wrap my head around how someone could find someone repulsive and then fall head over heels for them just because they took a bath. Heaven for I'd she ever get the flu.

[@leobeboop4944]

9:20 I'm convinced an ace person wrote this as a cover LMAO

[@poolboyatvampiremansion]

I was not ready for that 2nd one...wtf

[@TheBusyJane]

5:55 Are they describing breasts as separate beings? Or have they never seen breasts and equate them with testicles?

[@Lysandra_Bouquet]

As gross as this subreddit is, this has been the funniest video you’ve done on it yet 😂😂😂 Thanks for making my night 💜

[@laurad1487]

Next time you tackle males writing about females badly, just call it "Breast Fest"

[@nefertiti_fooling_fellow]

the part about the banana is from neil gaiman's book neverwhere. i liked it but that part idk like the girl was also a minor

[@LattePunch]

Wasn't a book but very recently at my job I heard similar on the age thing with a teen recently. I'm a school custodian for kids pre-k to 8th grade and when my shift starts there are still a few kids and teachers around waiting for the bus or to be called for pick from their parents. I can't do full cleaning with everyone still there but I go in the rooms and just sweep away any big trash on the floor that would block my vacuum. Anyway I walked in and just as one of the teachers was telling a kid to remember what he said in another 10 yrs and to never tell someone that again. The teachers are nice and like to talk to me sometimes. When she saw me she told me that kid just said in response to learning she was in her early 20s that "wow that's old" to her. I suck at telling ages but I'd probably guess the kid himself was 12 or 13 yrs old. This creepy mindset around when a woman gets "to old" doesn't seem to be stopping and its sad as it is disturbing.

[@helenblakovich1622]

OMG....please, more of this!! I was laughing so hard! Also, I think pastry guy was hungry while writing. At least, I hope so?

[@mckennar.5104]

i live in america and i love your accent so much. The was you said brenda as brendr was so funny. I know this sounds super american and dumb of me but i just love it so much

[@limitbreak2966]

nice I actually was first love your videos jamie , im in hospital right now so your video cheering me up

[@GlamourNNail]

Good lord! What must I look like at 43! I must be a shriveled husk of my girlish self with the skin of a dried out prune. Lol

[@PokhrajRoy.]

9:00 Do people think that every woman turns into Miss Havisham after they’re 30?

[@cerberaodollam]

Tbh, hangovers do get exponentially worse after 30 so it *feels* like you're old. I still look weirdly ageless though. And near identical to my dad, which is less awkward now that he's dead.

[@cory8526]

Breasts are written by man writers as if they were pet puppies.

[@katphish30]

Sweater puppies

[@squeaktheswan2007]

Doorbell: rings Girl: (Muffled barking coming from in the sweater) Oh no

[@tjenadonn6158]

@@squeaktheswan2007 Calm your tits. Seriously they attacked the mailman and bit through his Achilles tendon.

[@squeaktheswan2007]

@@tjenadonn6158 I need to send them to boobedience classes.

[@John_Weiss]

@@katphish30 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@YukikoEx]

(joke comment) Breasts retracting due to being depressed? Omg! That makes it so much easier for AFAB people to get rid of body disphoria! Ty kindly author!

[@edenmariemusic]

"hey are you doing okay?" no I've been feeling so debreast recently

[@painsan16]

I NEED to know the names of those books, so that I can avoid them 🤢🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮

[@ceilinh6004]

I've seen that depressed breasts snippet before. It gets me every time. 🤣

[@muriel5826]

“Unnecessary breast mentions” 🤣🤣

[@imelevensoshutthefup6476]

Christmas?!?! What about Halloween? :(

[@lintree]

"Made her poverty endearing rather than repulsive" manages to stand out to me because WOW does it put into perspective what kind of men write this rubbish

[@thebadpoet]

The banana thing is from Neverwhere, by Neil Gaiman. The girl is Door, the man is Richard. The author has a history of sexualizing underage women characters (like a LOT of authors do, especially in fantasy and sci fi.)

[@PokhrajRoy.]

Toxic People or Masochists like being despised. It applies to everyone across the spectrum.

[@cerberaodollam]

Also people who are proud of being different because they tried to fit in and it hurt too much so they bounced back instead and embraced their weird *fiercely*. Yes I'm talking about myself lol.

[@datpotat3945]

I recall 2:17 from a Stephen King collection of short stories, I think. He doesn't have the best track record when writing about women, and this was painful to read not just because it was mean, buy because it's pretty clear that that's how the characters think about themselves.

[@coinsilver3]

I'm 35 and had been mistaken for a 20 something, so...

[@thedisguise3538]

I had the same thought about the Richard passage, that the woman's name was also Richard

[@afaye2268]

omg i’m early 😱 so happy to be here as always!

[@Cebollaverde]

No I’m NOT flat chested…my breasts are simply depressed and have withdrawn into themselves

[@jimpickens5936]

He looked like a croissant, thin at the top, thin at the bottom, but the middle… the middle has grown beautifully like the dough of the latry had risen in the oven. He was… quite the specimen. Lol That’s what I thought of at the pastry one. Also, I kinda thought it would be cute if just left at “she was like a pastry with too much sugar”. Like just a bit puffy and too sweet

[@melindadeniselee]

I was laughing so hard because of the writing ✍️

[@michellecoleman5577]

Ok, the 2nd quote, (the road-trip one) is Stephen King which I've read many times. I would argue this is not 'men writing women badly', quite the opposite. This is reflective of what these characters think based on what society tells them about their bodies and self-image. It's a critique of men more than women because it implies that the men in their lives have cut them down to the point that they really believe themselves to be worthless. Not only that, but if you actually pay attention, there are so few characters in all of Stephen King's work that are actually described in a favorable manner, regardless of gender. He has a habbit of pointing out the most uncomfortable flaws of humanity. Meaning he rarely uses flattering or pc descriptors. And it wasn't only their weight that they thought made them undesirable, but their children as well. Implying that they have been taught that they and their children would be a burden to any man.

[@vampyrekyng_lex]

He refers to a woman’s pubic area as an ant hill at one point in under the dome

[@raine_rainegoaway]

LMAO THE DIFFERENCE OF TONE IN THE TWO COMMENTS

[@roanc3709]

Stephen king has a terrible track record of writing women terribly (and just writing terribly in general actually). In what I’ve read of his work it’s never presented as the womens own insecurities, it’s always written as a factual statement and usually an unnecessary one. Brenda and jasmine aren’t presented worried they’re seen as fat and disgusting, it’s stated that they ARE fat and disgusting and they know it. Those are separate things and are yet another of a very very long list of examples of Kings extremely misogynistic attitudes to women in his writing. And no, men are not given the same treatment.

[@Miaka99]

The one with the Writer talking about the 2 fat women 100% got rejected by a Bigger woman at a bar. He's feelings were hurt so he wrote a book about it.

[@poisonedkilljoy9304]

1:37 that’s…that’s Stephen King everybody. i remember that short story, and it doesn’t get any better from that

[@thegoosegirl42]

I immediately recognized the banana bit as a line from Neverwhere by Neil Gaiman. Man has a problem.

[@tjenadonn6158]

Well he was raised in a family that's very high up and well connected in the Church of Scientology. He's no longer personally a practicing Scientologist, but you don't have that sort of childhood without it leaving some marks on your soul.

[@MissDirect]

Really love this series, always so funny/bizarre and never fails to make me laugh. Just as an FYI though, context of the book can be very important. I recognised a quote in a different video as coming from artemis fowl, and while the paragraph alone looked bad, as a whole I think the first book was great. Has strong female characters with personalities and motivations that are not just cast as romantic interests (they even have character development). Although I have say that no context in the world could explain most of the examples :D Great work as always.

[@SimonClarkstone]

5:33 I guess the subreddit you're reading is r/menwritingwomen; they do have the subtitle "She breasted boobily down the stairs", which is an extract from a longer parody.

[@adrienstarfaer]

I think all authors should be required to take a mandatory class on basic biology before writing, and always consult people who have teh experiences they want to write about. If a man is going to write about a woman, he should speak to women, and the reverse, if a woman is to write about a man, she should speak with men. If an only child is going to write about siblings, they should talk to people with siblings. If a cis person writes about a trans person, they should consult trans people. If you write about an experience not your own, talk to people who've had that experience and are comfortable talking about it. And multiple people are better, no two individuals have the same experience.

[@sarahvunkannon7336]

Well, that wouldn't necessarily work for all authors. Some authors don't go into their writing with any specific plans, so the only thing to do would be to write a draft first and THEN consult the people with experiences. But I agree, consulting a person with experience is a step that needs to happen sometime before publication. Any time before publication. Just let SOMEONE catch the mistakes.

[@natalieholmes1117]

I appreciate your immediate physical repulsion towards fatphobia. It's not fat bodies that are disgusting, it's bigotry!

[@rhyscrowley266]

The "now they are cheering road trip" is so cruel and is clearly used with dirision. It's saying that it's stupid of them to be excited for a raid trip as road trips aren't going to be enjoyable for people like them. Ppl like them don't get to share in joy apparently

[@schokoloko2092]

The video just started, but damn Jamie your Hair looks fabulous!! Is it styled differently?

[@kimcarter129]

It baffles me that that these men feel compelled to describe woman’s breast when they write about them.