Big Sister Advice Questions (PT 2) | Cheating Spouse, Bad In-Laws, Red Flags, Burn Out, Finances

[@cavarsarah9543]

To the woman with kids whose husband cheated: leave. Take the kids. I am the child of a father who cheated; my mom gave him another chance. He cheated again. He is not worth the trauma & relationship issues your kids will very likely develop as a result of having a father who so deeply disrespects their mother. I wish you the best. Thank you, Michel, for your videos and for answering these topics with compassion!

[@jjm2948]

Primarily women cheat emotionally and men physically ….huge difference. And you have to find out why he cheated before going off like u know the exact dynamic of the relationship.

[@jennyhammond9261]

In regards to the last question (cheating ex that won't stop reaching out): You CANNOT use words/phrases like "think", "I'm not in a place right now", or "it would be nice". You have to be direct. Do NOT contact me. I will block you. If you use the aforementioned phrases, they will interpret as hope that that you will change your mind.

[@ck7506]

Just block him. Everywhere. Done.

[@racheldyer9250]

If necessary, if they will not respect boundaries, getting a restraining order may be a good option. Things can get dangerous or get out of hand very quickly.

[@liliesofthefield5310]

If someone says they don't want kids, don't stay hoping they'll change their mind, I've never wanted kids, everyone told me that I would change my mind once I got older, here we are 20yrs later and still don't want kids, if anything I don't want them even more now because I'm older, don't settle for someone you hope will change, hold out for the one who's completely compatible for you

[@ggpink5866]

As a perfectionist OCD type - I'll never forget the day I said screw it to a perfect house. My son was only a couple weeks old and there was stuff everywhere as you mama's know. So walking through the living room while carrying him, I kicked a blanket on the floor out of my way and thought this is my life now. And guess what? It's ALL GOOD!

[@libbymorehouse4466]

If you do this again, I'd love to see it with Jordy. Obviously he's lived a different life so it would be interesting to hear his perspective too! Love your takes

[@farahkhan2364]

I agree!!

[@MichelJanse]

Ooh love this idea! :)

[@gretaegan5784]

Your comment about being aware of how sensitive you are each day & not seeking out people who might have innacurate ideas of you is SUCH good advice. Especially in this age of so much social media consumption and comparison. Also side note - you are such a ray of sunshine and since coming across your videos a few weeks ago I've found so much comfort and inspiration in your content 🌞💗

[@racheldyer9250]

I heard something one time, that truly resonated with me. It was along the lines of, breakups hurt worse than a death, because with a death, you typically have closure, you keep memories close, and you morn the loss of the person. But, in a breakups or divorce, you do not typically get closure and you are morning all of the plans, hopes, and dreams you had with that person, though they are still here on earth. I know this doesn't really help directly, but it really helped me by reminding myself that my feelings and emotions were normal, valid, and part if the process. On the red flags.. I definitely agree with listening to what their family and friends say. In addition, other ones can be clingyness, work ethic, their beliefs on things (especially important things to you), see how they react when their mad or upset, see them in stressful situations, are their expectations acceptable or possible, do your hopes and dreams aline, how are they with budgeting or money, are they extremely flirtatious with others when your out, etc.

[@marianacastano3277]

To the question about not being in a wedding and refusing to go if you don’t think they should be getting married. I was in my friends wedding even though I didn’t think she should be married and strongly disliked her husband.. She’s been married for years and as far as I know they are happy and have a wonderful life with their kids… if I would have taken a stance I wouldn’t be apart from her life now and wouldn’t be able to support her in even stage of her life… I also once dated a man who was completely wrong for me and I had a coworker come to me and tell me “hey, I know I this isn’t my place to say this but just in case you needed someone to tell you that it’s okay to get out of that relationship if he doesn’t treat you right or you aren’t completely happy with him you have every right to leave” and she was right.. I left him and a year later found my husband that makes me so much happier than I ever thought I could be 😊

[@violettaarkadievna6179]

if you see something hurtful do even believe a second, you are literally perfect, your looks, talks, the way you carry yourself are goals for millions!

[@tinamontevecchi223]

People need to take a step back when it comes to other people’s relationships. Everyone said my hubby & me were never going to last. It’s been 33 years since we got married. Nobody has a crystal ball & can determine who is going to make it & who won’t.

[@ellll22q]

Michel - just wanted to say that the way you express yourself and your opinions is so kind and full of grace. I love hearing your answers because they are so thoughtful and it encourages me to be more thoughtful. Even though these questions weren’t ones I struggle with in my own personal life, seeing how you carry yourself and answer hard questions is inspiring. Thank you for sharing - I admire how you manage to stay soft, gentle, kind and yet still enforce healthy boundaries in this at times harsh environment!

[@esterwilson9931]

You have so much maturity and wisdom and eloquence!

[@jesc7596]

great new series! thank you! love the advice & insight 👏

[@leslieledezma9096]

I recommend including a retinol in that skincare routine! I typically do vitamin c serum under my moisturizer in the morning and alternate nights with retinol at night 💓 please slowly build a tolerance to retinol!

[@cassandrar8153]

I do exactly this routine too!

[@ggpink5866]

This was fun, Michel. Keep 'em coming!

[@9384cows]

There comes a point in your life when you have to let go of the past to make room for your future!

[@heatherhuang6404]

Love your perfectionism recommendations. Also loving your food videos. Your alternatives for gluten and working with things you have is inspiring.

[@autumnclack6073]

I declined to be in the wedding party for a friend because her now husband is a narcissist and did not consistently treat her well. I told her I will always love her and be there for her, but because I love her I can only want the best for her. It didn't stop her from getting married, but it did give her an oulet when things are rough. She also knows I'll always be honest with her. We are still friends. Her husband knows, and quite surprisingly, 20 years later, she still wants my approval. I just wouldn't have felt like a true friend if I wasn't honest with her.

[@Shanny-m3z]

Ive been following you since your first videos ** like when you first started...ive been mentally not around latly like 3 or 4 months, and to come back and see how good you and your husband are inspiring 🎉

[@MPAPecuador]

That last sentence you said. Reminded me of the princess diaries “nobody’s can make you feel inferior without your consent”

[@mickeybooth9892]

My best friend refused to come to my first wedding as they said I was making the biggest mistake of my life a couldn’t watch me blow up my life and boy was they every right at the time it was devastating not to have them there but hubby #1 long gone. ( cheater ) and my bestie is still here 35 yrs later .

[@darlenegrit6959]

Hi Michel, love this type of content. You are a very kind and caring person. You give very solid advice and as someone that is older , I think is great advice , I wish I had your insight when I was your age!

[@maryannkilduff8659]

Love this, you did a great job! ❤

[@kittygartland5305]

Michel I wish I was as wise and mature at your age as you are !!! It would have saved me so much heart ache!!! Now I have a daughter your age and I am very proud of the women she has become. It's my 42nd anniversary today and am so happy we finally grew up ! 😊 God Bless You 🙏

[@antheasvlog]

Loooooved these Q&A videos as someone who wishes to have had a big sister 😘

[@KimberlyPenny22]

I told a guy I was interested in him one time and he wasn’t interested in me but asked me if I wanted to go to the movies immediately after our conversation. I told him it was inappropriate for me and him to go to the movies together. A few months later I met my husband! I’m so grateful for his rejection or I wouldn’t have met better half! 😅♥️

[@AudraLeigh01]

I also didn’t understand the “you know when you know” until I met my current boyfriend. 3 years together now and he is my best friend and I love him so much. I just knew…I knew 2 weeks in and have only received confirmation of knowing since ❤

[@Hey-its-Alexa]

On the comment that had “2 kids” at the end of their question. I loved how you answered this. A two part answer. As I have left a marriage with one kid a long time ago. Also something to think about. What kind of example do you want your kids to see? Would you want your kids to stay because of their kids? Is it healthy enough to stay till kids are grown? Some do wait for this reason. Is it more healthy to leave, heal, and move on? Each situation is different from the next. And it’s hard to know what the right answer is at that time. I hope this person has good godly counsel they can go to because whatever they decide it’s gonna be hard. As for me, I’m so glad I left and now I’m in a wonderful marriage. Best wishes to the person who asked that question and all other questions as well ❤️❤️

[@bernadetteerdmann9095]

Wish you a wonderful day! Also love this series …

[@MichelJanse]

Thank you!! You too friend🥰

[@ValthatBish]

would you ever resign the contact that has you on a set schedule

[@1231amandamarie]

Such great advice! I’m in my mid 30’s, and I can’t help but think of how badly my 20 year old self needed to hear these words. Thank you for sharing your wisdom with all of your viewers. I’m so glad, especially for the younger generations, that we have someone like you to learn from. 💛

[@MichelJanse]

🤍🤍🤍

[@spider-mantobeymaguirefanc9469]

@@MichelJanseI love you so much ❤

[@Sunflowers_220]

So true ! Micheal is such a gem.

[@bekahchapman1646]

As for the in-laws MAKE SURE your spouse will choose YOU over their parents. Or you will either be miserable or not last ESPECIALLY if you choose to have children. I have a pretty rough FIL and it’s taken a long time to basically unbrainwash both his kids away from his crazy self and they both now put their wives (me and my SIL) wayyyy above him ir it would not work at all

[@user-mv2tg8hc8c]

When we are young it’s hard to notice or tell when we are seeing red flags. Unless you have great formation, great people around us pointing out concerns, and us being truly open to see the whole picture, it can be very hard to see.

[@ChristineS-sf3rc]

That was good Michel... yes, to once a month🎉😄 Thank you for your time. God bless you❤❤

[@aksez2u]

For the person whose husband cheated on her - From my own point of view, I think I could get over being cheated on. The part that is making everyone say GO is the part where he's not trying to be better, not caring, not being transparent, maybe trying to gaslight you. THAT is the horror sh*t show that is that person's character.

[@meganmcgowan827]

I work in mental health and I will say, your advice was so kind, thoughtful, and genuine. Love this. You are a wise big sister to us!

[@MichelJanse]

this means so much🥹

[@maxonrylee]

I really appreciate your cooking content also ✨

[@bethanysmith7554]

I loved this!

[@chadri014]

This was a lot of fun. Couldn't you start a podcast videos type series for like every 2nd month? It would also be cool to have Q&As, "sharing my thoughs" type of videos, and ask stories from viewers to read and share here online? I think it will make the community on here very interesting and personal? 😊 Just a thought...

[@shelbyim5vaughns]

Omg Michel, I was in target and Seed is sold there now. I thought of you!

[@isabellalacy9901]

Ahh Michel!! I love this so much and I love these chatty vlogs so much. Thank you for always being yourself and showing your day to day life. You are such an inspiration to me and so many other people. Thank you for being vulnerable and authentic with us and I love that about you. Ilysm and I hope you’re having an amazing day 💕

[@MichelJanse]

Thank you so much Isabella!!🫶🥰

[@victoriaamira5390]

Love this thumbnail!! 🎉🎉🎉

[@annikaa.3854]

You’re so wise for your age!

[@elothegreat3011]

Please keep doing these! You have very good advice. ❤❤❤

[@ritabarnes2440]

I always enjoy these!

[@MichelJanse]

I’m so glad!🥹

[@florineads2747]

A guy and I are In love, but I am in couple. I wanted to quit my bf for him but he lied to me several times and was talking and seeing other girls. After one year he told me he changed and won’t manipulate anymore, do you think I can trust ?

[@janeashton2027]

Making the first move towards a guy, that doesn't like to have a conversation with any woman, he is very quiet and he is a mommy's boy, and he still lives at home with mommy

[@noraoconnor9364]

Can you link part 1?

[@AllieEm]

I've been so busy that I haven't been watching KZbin but when I do I immediately go to you :) love this video, love you, and what you are doing with your channel 💛💛

[@olivet.9948]

Ok but I really want to try that matcha!!

[@daleadoherty7000]

Once a cheater, always a cheater. Don't stay because of your kids. Leave and start a new life for yourself and your kids. You have to be happy to raise happy children!!!

[@efi8086]

I made the first move and until this day I ask my husband why he didn’t lol 🤣 our 11 year anniversary is coming up ❤

[@rmk7101]

Love this new video style ❤️

[@kathysmith1451]

I love your food videos! I can't afford most of the ingredients 😢

[@Eclecting]

Thanks for the advice for content creators! You are a breath of fresh air.

[@Komal-lj4zg]

Hey please share your diet for lupus

[@kcmorris4875]

LOVEEEE these so much!!!! Thank you Michel you are so inspiring, kind, gentle and graceful. xxxx

[@daniellejosephine]

These are so good, and I think you're giving such solid advice (so kindly too!). I wish I knew these things in my 20's!

[@kelseywinterhalt6468]

Interesting Q&A section of advice around two! I love your Q&A advice about everything about marriage and dating. 😊

[@kadeesalisbury]

thank you for being yourself + humble enough to share some of the harder things we don’t usually hear about. wishing you + jordy all the love 🪩🩷💫

[@ValthatBish]

your 90 will always be amazing I'm so happy you feel that

[@megstarbright]

Love these videos!

[@suecorrigan1216]

Love your thoughts on things!!❤

[@crisslpz___]

Where was the question about splitting finances? 😅

[@DianneBunting]

oh the things I could say about this but~~Michel, you are a beautiful soul with a wonderful life with an incredible man. And you just keep shine shine shining because you my sweet girl are worth it. Love an ole lady from Ontario Canada mwahhhh

[@MichelJanse]

This is so kind, thank you 🥹

[@Callisi]

I looove your videos! Have a wonderful day! Love from Greece!😊

[@leeg9787]

I loves these videos. Thanks for sharing! ❤

[@MichelJanse]

I’m so glad you like them!🥰

[@marianamoore5943]

Love this !

[@marcyfalconer1275]

As an older woman, great advise! You have "your head on your shoulders" Michel. Thank you for the video.

[@MichelJanse]

This is kind, thank you🥹

[@unapologeticallyromel7096]

Love your channel ❤

[@How.Dare.You.]

Do you think partner noticing pretty women in public and looking at them longer than 3s or giving 2nd glimses is a red flag?

[@lizzygrace6322]

Like the Q&A videos!

[@SandyMath-xq5ve]

Love these sisterly advice videos! I’m nearly twice your age and absolutely could not have given such thoughtful advice in my 20s. You will help a lot of people. ❤

[@MichelJanse]

🥹

[@Ang-n9p]

Who on earth would want to stay friends with your ex husband. He cheated and lied, terribly, and more. No one good I’d bet. Not to project

[@nadinepotgieter9594]

You give really good advice...🎉❤

[@owbliviow]

😍 Nice video! I have a funny request, is it possible that you realize a new video on KZbin where you make a funny hairstyle on a boy hair ( Mohawk or spike ? ) With gel! It will be very cool! Thank you

[@cetinozden6937]

Hello love you're amazing ❤❤❤

[@ValthatBish]

the lil screw you omg i love the attitude

[@MichelJanse]

😂😂😂

[@dianaallen5700]

Yeah every time she says something like that I lose it. My dog is still looking at me funny. So unlike her but I love it. Screw you comes outta my mouth 10 (good day) to 20 (better day😁) times a day and that's me being nice. I really don't tolerate stupidity well. Anyways... Coming from Michel that makes my day. Atta girl...

[@emily57644]

Your shirt where is it from?

[@MichelJanse]

Free people!!🥰 go.magik.ly/ml/25avj/?fbclid=PAZXh0bgNhZW0CMTEAAaYN2iqpMXezTGEMEboutjHWDkbHeHtii4H6RxnuvfN52zvebMK7EFHDIhA_aem_u4VxHtmmujEYuANx2_82VA

[@bethanysmith7554]

Thanks for helping us girls enforce healthy boundaries too 😊❤️

[@MichelJanse]

So important!

[@Eliza34nc]

There should be a podcast, not a KZbin video

[@ValthatBish]

Hi Team

[@lvlysticgirl]

I thought your advice was great!

[@user-wi5iz8py3n]

For some of these questions, I would question why people are asking you to answer them so publicly… the questions seem to be manipulating you into defending things that are no one’s business

[@charlenedelange3934]

Hi friend 🎉🎉 have a lovely day

[@MichelJanse]

Hello!! You too🥹🥰

[@leek7987]

Your comment on the cheating husband is not biblical.

[@mariamangion21]

Magnificent Intelligent Caring Happy Ecstatic Loyal

[@MichelJanse]

🥹🤍

[@CarolJoyable]

Respectfully disagree with your advise on the woman that has a husband that cheats but they have two kids. The adult decision would be to put the children first and let them live in a home with two parents. She chose the wrong man but the kids shouldn’t pay for it. They both need to behave civilized toward one another and focus on raising their kids. Time to keep the door shut on their sexcapades and suck it up until the kids are 18. Unless he harms her or them physically, she needs to stay in the home with him.

[@CharisBombela]

No absolutely not.

[@kge6492]

Only if the cheating spouse is a good parent. If they are both bad spouse and bad parent, clear reason to take them away.

[@CamrynCarter-wx2es]

you’re the best big sister ever!!!🩷🩷 your videos make my day so much better! thank you for all you do!

[@MichelJanse]

This is so sweet🤍🤍

[@SuzyqLimon]

I liked it, but missed notification to submit questions, help me see it? I do follow you on Instagram

[@whitttrujillo8470]

I LOVE these. I did not submit any questions but a lot of these actually helped me and applied to my life currently. Thank you!🩵💙

[@ValthatBish]

[@diane_1904]

Keep these up. You have a wonderful perspective of life ❤