Minecraft, Disability, and Being Human

I've had some thoughts about my complicated relationship with Minecraft and KZbin bouncing around in my brain for a while, and I've finally put them down into a video essay format. Don't worry, more fun stuff is on its way (something I've been looking forward to for a hot minute!!) but for now, I hope this leaves people feeling less alone.

[@no_name6168]

I'm autistic and Minecraft is the only thing that can actually calm me down from a meltdown a lot of the time. my world is my safe place

[@thedramaticherbalist]

That's amazing that Minecraft can be that for you!!

[@zaimcraft6581]

Same, the real world feels to big and unpredictable sometimes. It’s to loud. I can control the volume in game with headphones on.

[@mooncatcher_]

Can't agree more. Its also a safe place to meet people similar to me like i did under this video.

[@BazilBuildBases]

i never diagnosed(nearly impossible at my place as an adult), but i can relate for some degree. here, far from home, this small world i have on my laptop is like a piece of home that always with me. a personal, bag-sized safe room which have a size of the small universe.

[@TinyRobotED-tm9rs]

I’m autistic and I like minecraft

[@drag0natlas]

1:33 "i can never fully engage in anything through the think fog I wade through every day just to exist." Thank you for putting this into words for me. This video popped up in my recommended right when I needed it. I don't have mobility problems but I'm autistic and I've been struggling a lot with ADHD and depression for years, and it's hit a point where I can barely keep up with my basic needs, let alone maintain a job, pass my classes, and deal with all the seemingly small things my family, friends, and others expect from me. Thank you so much for sharing this video and for the encouragement.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Our brains can be so tricky to deal with, there's no visible barrier so we feel extra bad about ourselves if it keeps us from functioning. I'm so sorry you've had to deal with that. You'll make it, even if making it doesn't look like what you want or expect.

[@hsartulS]

and thank you great commenter on an amazing video for putting my thoughts into your thoughts into your words (if that makes sense) im kinda in the exact same situation. with the autism, adhd, depression, anxiety, etc. i can barely get up in the morning. video games (especially minecraft) are the only things keeping me going but they also really take all the energy i have left in a day.

[@IslaTheCutie]

Same here plus Cognitive Disengagement Syndrome which puts the word "fog" here onto another level,,,

[@isabellefaguy7351]

I was always told as a child and teenager that if I only tried a little harder, I would be able to x and y and z... At 37, I got diagnosed as autistic, after yet another - autistic - burnout and a second time ending up homeless despite having worked at least twice harder as anyone else I've ever met to "success" and to "meet expectations". Now, I know that there are some things I really can't do and some things I can do but require accommodations, support, etc. It's a little late, because my nervous system is so destroyed at this point. But now I don't blame myself for all my failures. I just recognize that I didn't had the proper support, because people were not aware autism was a thing in the 1980's, let alone an autistic girl. Thanks of your video, it sure will help people feel less alone.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

I'm so sorry you've had to go through all of that, I hope that you're building that extra support that you need now. It sounds like you're finally able to be gentle towards yourself about it all which is so huge!!

[@woodookitty]

this hits hard. I just got diagnosed with autism last year at 38 and the burnout is real. I can't do half the things that NT people can and when i actually put in the effort to do them everything else blows up. now i'm in a hole where I can't really do things for myself and all my energy goes into work and it's so draining.

[@fivepigeonstall]

i have a genetic disability called ehler-danlos syndrome which has caused so many other conditions in my life. Trying too keep up with teenagers my age is impossible, i feel left behind alot. Finding disabled content creators makes feel less alone. i love my friend i really do but they physically cannot understand. Minecraft became an escape for me during lockdown as it had always been a big part of my childhood and it provided that sense of safety when the world was falling apart. Thank you for sharing your experiences and making people feel less alone, i hope life becomes kinder to you. you deserve it

[@thedramaticherbalist]

EDS sucks, I'm so sorry hon. It's so difficult when the people around us can't fully understand. It's so good you have Minecraft as a safe space! Glad to have you here

[@totallynotabot6003]

I've got similar issues like dysautonomia and POTS. You're not alone, stay strong.

[@incaraids]

This is increadibly vulnerable and I am both proud of you and moved by this. It reminds me of why I play Minecraft and I am sure there are a lof of other people that can relate to this. Stay You homie because you are amazing.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Thank you

[@jannieszporski9194]

Never had the pleasure of watching any of your videos before now, but I am tremendously glad I stumbled upon your channel. From just those 4 minutes I watched emerges an image of an incredibly kind and unbelievably determined person. It's genuinely inspiring -- thank you for making this. Stay strong, and never stop creating!

[@thedramaticherbalist]

You're so sweet, thank you!!

[@timewarper9575]

I cannot pretend to fully understand your struggles, but this video is really eye-opening. I hope you know that we all care about you. Stay safe :)

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Thank you so much!

[@greetingsflos]

Hi, thank you for this. I may not be suffering from physical disability but I do have Autism and ADHD. Your talk about loneliness and trying to make friends really resonates with me, it is really hard trying to make friends when you're constantly tired, burnt out and and overstimulated. But what makes it even more difficult is losing things and hobbies that I'm passionate about. I'm just an empty husk now that lives by day by day. Even so this video has been really comforting. You're a great human being :)

[@official_leafstar360]

Didn’t know I needed this today. But thank goodness I did. As someone with a neurodivergent brain, Minecraft is a way for me to escape and be myself, and in a world that is made for neurotypical brains, it gets exhausting to get out of bed and face the day because you feel like you have to mask and change who you are just to get by, it is understandable why so many people with any disability or disorder to enjoy the game. I hope for the best and once again thanks for being willing to share this.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

I'm glad you found this encouraging, Minecraft is so cool like that! Thanks for being here!

[@Q-werty30]

I have adhd, dyslexia, and a weird knee, and this video speaks to me. When I get upset over not being able to do something, I love to kick back with a video much like this one.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

I'm glad the video gave you a little breath of fresh air!

[@roboltamy]

I won't get into the specifics of what I deal with (since my physical and mental issues aren't anyone else's business), but hearing about how hard things are for someone else can feel invalidating and make me feel like I should just be able to "get over" or "power through" my issues. It's a lot of feeling as though I'm just "not trying hard enough" which sucks because sometimes it's clear that objectively I'm dealing with significant issues, even if they might seem less severe and less limiting than the issues of others. I guess it boils down to something like "The struggles of others don't invalidate your own." I'd also like to be clear that I'm not trying to say anyone else is at fault for causing me to feel how I feel, it's just a result of my own thoughts going in a bad direction.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

That's such a hard thing to work through and I feel you! Everyone's struggles are different and just because someone has one set of difficulties to deal with, it doesn't make yours less hard to get through. Your struggles are valid and you'll make it through

[@VariisNailo]

Same, i often feel like I should be pushing beyond my limits and just soldier on because I see others worse off than me who do… while in reality it was my adoption of this exact mindset and behaviour as life got a lot harder that lead to me developing chronic health issues and mental health problems. I feel like I should be pushing myself to swim a lap of the pool, when in reality I’m just barely able to do a half-decent job at keeping my head above water.

[@stan8479]

My wife is as severely physically disabled as you are, and listening to you talk about your physical limitations reminds me of her a lot. I just wanted to tell you that you are valued and important to others, even if you can't be there at your full 100%. Living life with such a big disability can get quite lonely, so I wanted to reach out and show you some love. Keep taking care of your body in the way that is right for you, and don't let anyone else tell you you're doing it wrong.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Thank you, I appreciate this so much

[@sleepysucculent7349]

i haven't watched your videos before, but i'm glad youtube sent me here. the ending made me teary-eyed, i needed to hear all of that. i'm not able to be "productive" most of the time, which stresses me out because it feels like i'm wasting my life away doing nothing. but even if i can't work or live as active of a life as most people, there's meaning to be found in little things everywhere... like video games!

[@thedramaticherbalist]

It's so stressful, especially living in a world that constantly tells us our worth is based in our productivity!! Thanks for being here

[@ToYourStations]

this showed up in my recommended videos and I don't know how youtube knew I'd relate, but I definitely do. I'm sorry to hear you're struggling and I hope you have all the support you need

[@settleluna7692]

Same here! 🎉

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Aw I'm so glad you found it!

[@Creativeman2]

Seeing this reminded me a lot of GoodTimesWithScar. I hope he sees this video too. Thank you for sharing it with us, and please, just like you said it in the video, don't stress your self too much.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Thank you so much!

[@SoGoesLife_]

Its amazing to see how many people use minecraft as a way to express themselves. I myself have a disability, whilst its not a physical one, its a mental one. I’m really happy to see a game I adore help so many, in ways that are so similar but yet so so different to how it helps me. I’m so proud of everyone who needed to hear the message this video pervades. And I’m more than proud of Herbalist for conveying, it can be so difficult to talk about these things.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

I love hearing all the different ways people are using Minecraft to deal with different life situations!!

[@layncemc]

This was incredibly well spoken. I have ADHD, and I've been told countless times, possibly Autism as well. It is beyond difficult to understand what "normal" means for me, because so many things keep me from being the status quo. The bright side to this, is I've taught myself that it's okay to be different. I've been told it all my life, but to really understand that it's okay, and love yourself despite your differences is a whole other story. My brain jumps all over the place, which makes it really hard to commentate, remember day to day tasks, or do most things that require any amount of working memory. But on the other side, because my brain wanders so much, I am also a really creative person who never stops thinking of ideas. Where I lack in the ability to remember someone's name, I make up for in the ability to turn it into a funny moment. I did a video talking about it, and it was so all over the place, and disorganized, but it really showed how my funky brain works. I frequently will leave in stutters or moments when I have brain fog because that's who I am. I can't control it. And I don't think that's something to be shunned. I love myself. We jump hurdles that others do not, and yet we still are here. You have done so well, never stop being you. For me, minecraft is a canvas to explore my copious amounts of hobbies. Filmmaking, photography, architectural design, storytelling and worldbuilding- this really is the perfect game. It has so much room for you to explore different playstyles and experiment with playing the game in whatever way you enjoy playing. I've been playing minecraft for around 13 years now, but I will never stop as long as I can help it. Every person experiences life in a different way, and that is 1000% okay. Some people have it more difficult than others, but that doesn't make us worth less of love- and have so much love to give to others as well. You are a wonderful human being that deserves the entire world. Don't let anyone tell you different. You are appreciated and loved by so many more than you know. You have come so far, and have pushed through so much and that, is something to be commemorated. You are amazing; and I am so proud of you for being you. That was a mess of an essay but I hope my thoughts were explained well enough. Have a wonderful day

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Love a messy essay :D it sounds like in a lot of ways we've had a lot of similarities in our journeys. Still working on getting over what other people think and say about me because honestly that's not what matters anyways. We just do our best to be our best selves and that's so different for everyone!

[@layncemc]

@@thedramaticherbalist exactly! Keep up the good work! Pace yourself, stay hydrated, make sure to eat ❤️

[@generalpests]

as a fellow minecrafter who happens to be disabled. I hear you. I see you too.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

[@ChloeVFX]

I don't struggle with any sort of physical disabilities, but as someone who struggles with AuDHD, and Depression, Minecraft, despite the fact that it overwhelms me with how much can or could be done, is still a game that I come back to every so often after, say a particularly bad day, or to calm down after a very active and exciting VC with friends. I've had my singleplayer world for eight years now, and I've been somewhat consistently been playing the game since February 2011. It's one of very few games that can calm me down, and overwhelm me in the same breath. This video essay is wonderfully formatted and well done. I'm glad KZbin recommended me your video, and I'll be taking a look at some of your other videos, and possibly sticking around for more. :) Have a wonderful rest of your day and future days.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Oh man I feel the overwhelm on all the possibilities! It's such a good game to come back to though, even for a chill evening of mining :D

[@victorlopezjr3590]

It was an Honor to see such bravery, this is a video that I will share with my granddaughter. You have touched my Heart. And yes you are not alone. Thank you.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Aw, that's so sweet, thank you!

[@Lil_Lightning17]

I also struggle with disabilities, both Minecraft and Destiny are a release, an escape for me to do the things I'm not able to, to become somebody else even just temporarily. But at the end of the day... my disabilities are still here and... I'm still here... My disabilities are apart of who I am. Awhile it can be one of the loneliest feelings in the world, it has to remember I'm not alone, you're not alone. Your video is a reminder of that. I don't kown you, or your struggles and hardships, this is the first video of yours that I've watched but... I can relate to how you feel and you're not alone either.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Thank you

[@Lil_Lightning17]

@thedramaticherbalist You're welcome! I'm really gald to be living in the age where things like the internet and games can be so accessible. It's can build connections with others and thoes connections can mean the world.

[@Ast3r0ids]

I really appreciate this, I’m at a point in my life where it feels as though everyone is able to things that I have to beat up my brain to even comprehend, this is just made me realise to be thankful for what I do have and that I should be kinder to myself. Thank you, this has been rather eye opening. Thank you for putting into words the struggle I feel and thank you for making me feel less alone. You were only talking about your own experiences and yet they have validated all of the feelings I feel that no one else seems to have, so again thank you. ❤

[@thedramaticherbalist]

I'm so sorry you're struggling with that, that is so frustrating! I'm glad the video helped you feel less alone

[@S0ckIzBlue]

Thank you for making everyone feel less alone

[@SvengelskaBlondie]

I can quite relate to the feeling, it's not so fun when you really want to do something but you can't really do stuff due to bodily limitations (mine where severe lack of energy from CFS). The lack of energy wasn't really the worst, the worst was accidentally over-exerting yourself and then crashing and having to spend days/weeks to recover..

[@thedramaticherbalist]

CFS is the *worst*, I'm so sorry you have to deal with it too

[@yammy_]

I love how this video is connecting us together. I loveeee minecraft too. I have adhd and mc has always comforted me

[@thedramaticherbalist]

It's so cool to see how many people relate and find Minecraft to be a safe place!

[@HeyItsEmmy]

First time viewer here (thanks to @incraids for sharing the link). i just want to say that I find you amazing. I may not fully understand what your exact struggles are, but i dont need to. I understand that you are resiliant, inspirational and wonderful. Thank you for sharing your story. ❤

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Aw thank you so much - happy to have you here!!

[@Tr4shM0nk3y]

Hey Dee! Just want to put it in here - You are an absolute beautiful human being and an inspiration for others! I've not met you IRL but you are an absolutely valued part of our community. I hope the new opportunity will find you reaching to newer heights and a bright future. I wish you all the best and if you ever need someone to chat, you know where you can find people that are willing to listen and lift you up even though they might not fully understand your struggles.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Thank you so much!! I love the community that Minecraft has brought me and I'm so glad I get to be part of such a great group of people

[@aymie_cutie]

Amazing video! Youve never really talked much about how your conditions affect you, this really helps me understand your situation allot better and on some levels i can defenitly relate to these feeling though much more on the mental than the physical side of things for me. I really hope the new oppertunity works out for you, and if it doesnt know that that doesnt mean that youve failed. We still love you and whish all the best for you.❤❤❤

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Thank you Aymie **hugs**

[@ItsRachel_J]

I have a disability as well and Minecraft is my relexing place where I can create and relex when I am overwhelmed or overstimulated! It one of my favorite hobbies especially when I stream Minecraft it so calm and relax for me!

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Aw that's lovely! I'm so glad Minecraft can be that space for you too!

[@sporeham1674]

This is one of the most beautiful videos I have ever seen. I feel, so much less alone now. Minecraft has always been my escape. When my parents fought, when my depression got really bad, when my knees started to fail me, and I could barely walk, this game was here. And I am, so beyond glad that its done that for so many others, you included Dramatic Herbalist. This game is so special.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Thank you so much for the sweet words! I'm so sorry for all you've had to deal with, and I'm glad we have such a cool game and cool community to turn to

[@MxMeme-jk9xe]

As someone diagnosed with multiple mental disorders, Minecraft is a great escape from my reality that I will never be considered "normal". It's the only game I constantly go back to because you can do literally anything you want, the world is your oyster. That's in contrast to the real world where I'm extremely limited in what I can do because of my mental struggles. Minecraft is a part of my life I don't plan on letting go of anytime soon :)

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Minecraft is so special like that!!

[@DustyStickland]

currently stuck in bed playing video games as I'm unable to walk and even staying still is tremendously painful but just being reminded that I'm not alone, WE are not alone has really helped me today, thank you ❤

[@thedramaticherbalist]

I'm so sorry, and I hope things ease up for you! We're never fully alone, just gotta know where to look

[@RandomCritic1]

I don't have any physical disabilities, but I suffer from severe Executive Dysfunction, meaning that's difficult for me to understand and complete complex processes even if I am mentally and physically capable of doing. Whenever I get on stuck on a task, I'm too scared to ask for help because I'm afraid of being seen as incompetent. Your comment about wading through the thick fog just to exist really struck home because that's exactly how I feel with Executive Dysfunction. I toil over tasks that are second nature to my peers, and despite having all these issues, everyone around me has sky-high expectations of me, including myself. I found this video after making a blunder on a college form which cost my parents real-world money. I really needed to hear that it's okay to be dealing with these issues, and this video has helped cheer me up after that horrid mistake.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Oh those kinds of mistakes can be really hard to pull yourself out of the shame of. I'm glad you were encouraged by the video! Be gentle to yourself

[@katteycat]

i have been bedridden from illness for years and i feel similarly. i can only play mincraft for small amounts at a time because i get so dizzy but i love moving around in 3d space so freely like that. the not being able to willpower through things other people can do easily is hard. i find that honestly my baseline is actually doing that *all the time* just to be able to eat and sit up for small amounts of time takes an incredible amount of will and mental emotional strength. But i do it because i love living despite it. i love creating things. i love making art. i love minecraft. i put myself through the pain and excruciating effort to be able to do those things. and i think if i hsve something i care about like that, then it will be okay. even being sick.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Finding something to keep you going is such an important thing with disability! I'm sorry that even those are difficult for you, but I'm glad you have them and am glad you're here

[@silversilk8438]

You have touched my heart. I may be able bodied, but the same lying expectations of “when will I be enough?” And the question of “could people love me for things beyond my utility?” … they linger. There’s so much pain that can be brought about by clinging to a lie, but even with that realization, that doing is not what makes a person valuable… I do not know what to do with that lesson. Do I apply it? Do I sit here with some form of calm or bliss? There’s still a lot of pain because so many people in the surrounding world have the same lying expectations wedged into their heart. I feel like these words were a salve on the flesh left exposed after working to delicately wrest that lie away.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

I'm so glad this could have some healing for you! It's really hard to work through finding value in life beyond, like you said, utility, especially when so much around us tells us that's where our value starts and ends. Keep finding that happiness in yourself!!

[@fluffgotstudios9390]

i have been watching your videos for a long time. i love them SO much. i knew you were disabled, but i really didn’t know how bad it was. but keep going, so many people love you and your videos. keep slaying! (sir axolotinton guy btw)

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Dude I appreciate you so much, it makes the KZbin experience so fun to have people who genuinely enjoy what I'm enjoying making!!

[@ace1diots]

This video means a whole lot to me. As someone who had their fibromyalgia develop later in life, I miss being able to run around and clime trees and such! I understand a lot of these feelings pretty closely, and I love that you’ve chose to share your experiences with disability. We’ve both gotta keep going, and keep hoping! Wishing clear skys and lovely weather upon you :D!

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Yes, always keep going, whether it takes one foot in front of the other or a nap to get through! I'm sorry you have to deal with fibro, that's no fun

[@lukliiTV]

this is really lovely

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Sometimes you gotta survive for sure, but it's good to take time when you can for the things that keep you going!

[@Bagel_B0y]

1:33 "I can never fully engage in anything through the thick I wade through everyday just to exist" That short little sentence really resenates with me Also this video makes me really wanna play minecraft

[@thedramaticherbalist]

I'm sorry that resonates so much

[@yourlocaldemonboi]

minecraft is also the only thing i can do atm that doesnt exhaust my body and cause symptoms. prolly suffering from ME/CFS (chronic fatigue syndrome) or something else. small everyday tasks like doing my laundry, cooking, or even just walking up the stairs at home cause fevers, brain fog, muscle and joint pain and an extreme feeling of exhaustion that can last for days. i still paint but thats sometimes too much already. minecraft is literally keeping me from going insane rn. Thank you so much for sharing your story. and thank you for reading a part of mine. We are not alone

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Oof, I'm right there with ya. I'm so sorry you're dealing with CFS, it's no fun! I'm glad Minecraft gives you that space to exist and actually do something

[@mattkennerley9071]

I’ve been struggling for the last few years now with health. I’m waiting for adhd and autism diagnosis. Been on the lists for over a year and a half. Came out of counselling this year and was told going forward need to find a way to cope with the dips in my mood and coping with life’s downs. I got back into my survival world which I started during the pandemic learning to play survival for the first time. I’m hooked. It keeps my mind busy and me occupied instead of my mind going the wrong way.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

I'm so sorry you're going through all of that, it sounds overwhelming to deal with. Coping with Minecraft is so fantastic though!!

[@ourpleartboat]

not sure if im physically disabled or not yet- but ive been having a lot of physical problems, and while i can do things just existing seems to bring me a LOT of pain which. is very tiring and discouraging but video games have always been something i can do to destress and forget my pain for a bit so i really resonate with this 💜

[@thedramaticherbalist]

I love that video games can be that for us! I'm sorry you've been having health problems, even just figuring out what's going on can be so exhausting *hugs*

[@ourpleartboat]

@@thedramaticherbalist thanks ^v^ yeah i had to do a blood test which sucked.

[@natycrap]

I cant even move without crutches, "even something as low-key as playing a video game that opens up a pretense of normalcy is in and of itself almost more than I can do" I FEEL YOU. My character being able to talk, walk, and even jump, without the assistance of anything feels good. I know the feeling, cuz I get it every day just playing ANY SORT OF GAME (Mostly Minecraft, but it can be anything like Portal, Yume Nikki, Terraria etc.) makes me feel a sense of normalcy. In reality, I am Liminal, in a threshold between normal, and abnormal. I feel you

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Oh man I feel that idea of being liminal, not exactly abnormal but certainly not normal! I'm glad video games give you the ability to feel a little more normal

[@natycrap]

@@thedramaticherbalist thank u

[@Marlin123]

Legendary video, you knew what to show in exactly every frame. You even showed the cobble generator exploding which symbolizes stress from constant failiure. You explained in great detail that disability sucks and limits you but introduces you to other creative outputs.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Wow this is such a compliment, thank you! I definitely enjoyed working on the composition aspect of this video in particular so I'm glad people liked that!

[@nightwalker83]

I have Cerebral Palsy myself! It is good to hear Others with physical disabilities are playibv MineCraft too.

[@artemiscrowe2249]

As someone who used to be so strong and capable and lost it all, I can totally relate to you. I love minecraft for the same reason. On those days when I can barely leave my recliner, minecraft is always there for me, offering adventure and giving me the chance to be creative without my autoimmune nonsense limiting me. Thanks for sharing your challenges, and know that you are so not alone.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Aw thank you

[@llanfairpwlgwyngyll7331]

I think it's very strange how I've geared my real self up for something completely different, but the thing I do most of the time when playing is make and fill out maps of my world.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Aw that's so chill tho. Do you ever make map art?

[@jasonbriggs2518]

I am legally blind. It is nothing like what you have but I can kinda relate to some of the things you said. Reading hurts me like moving dose for you. This was really inspiring. Thank you and I hope your life is going well despite the challenges you are facing.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Isn't it so cool how even if our experiences are different we can still relate to each other through them? Thanks for being here!

[@drag0nblight]

I hope you already met the HermitCraft Community. They are really a great community.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

As someone who was watching Hermitcraft before I started playing Minecraft, I definitely agree!

[@septembercitrus221]

I was diagnosed with dysautonomia about a year ago, and I’ve been dealing with the symptoms for almost 2 years. I use a cane to help me walk now, and I used to like hiking and playing sports and just generally being an active person, but with how it affects my lungs, heart, and energy levels, It’s almost impossible for me to do those things for more than a few minutes. I really miss being active, but playing Minecraft is an outlet for me to be creative and feel productive and have fun. Thanks for sharing your life with us, and for helping me (and others too) feel understood ❤

[@thedramaticherbalist]

*hugs* it's so difficult to go from super active to barely functional for what seems like no reason. I'm sorry you have to deal with this kind of situation too, but I'm glad Minecraft gives us a virtual world to enjoy!

[@CrystalFier]

I have a severe form of fibromyalgia, and as I've gotten into my mid 30s, my mobility has declined to the point where I now spend most of my days sitting on my bed, unable to live much of a life. I'm also late-diagnosed AuDHD, which has been a bizarre experience. Minecraft is one of my few escapes from that, and knowing I'm not alone in those struggles within this community is incredibly comforting. 💙

[@thedramaticherbalist]

That's so frustrating and I'm so sorry. I'm glad this gave you something to connect with and know you're not alone here!

[@mask_of_moon]

Minecraft is more than a game. It's like therapy for people who need it, it's nostalgia to some, and it's almost like it's own gaming engine people use to create all kinds of things. Minecraft is amazing and I really love your video about it. I'm glad this was washed into my recommendation page.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

It's such a fantastic game! Glad you're here!

[@Necrovia]

I've gotten diganosed with a few mental and physical disabilities, and you seem to capture the essence of the reason why I play games like Minecraft. It gives me back what I once was able to experience; exploring nature and socialize with people. "I can't brute force my body, and often by extension my brain to do it what I need to." I feel that, alot. There is no "just try harder" with me. There is all that I can give and that is it. And I need the engery in order to just function. I too walk thourgh the thick fog, with no clear sense of direction. This video means alot, even if it is justa short thing to get off of your chest.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

I'm so glad it was able to give you something to connect with

[@gamingchickenstudios]

Well said. As someone diagnosed with autism a several other things ever since i was 5 this video just about sums up how i feel about Minecraft. Minecraft is an amazing game... Im glad that i found this video in my recommended a you've earned my subscribe and attention. Ill definitely check out a continue to watch your videos as this is exactly the type of a content creator i want to watch. Please continue making more content!

[@thedramaticherbalist]

I love that Minecraft is such a safe and peaceful world for so many of us!

[@mcs_drinkwater]

I just stumbled on this video, but I'm glad I did. I think sharing your experience is a beautiful thing to help others understand what you're going through. I'm proud that you and so many others continue to go on in spite of the struggle.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Thank you so much

[@Zara_Beth]

i felt this video and all these thoughts, in my soul ❤ minecraft has also given me an escape when i'm not physically well enough to do any of the things i love in real life

[@thedramaticherbalist]

I'm glad the game is here for you, and glad you're here

[@viiederverurteilung1087]

One of my best friends in the entire world is limited by things like this. She never talks about her past much and often brushes things off even when her legs puff up and swell from walking for a few hours or when she cant even get up because the pain is too intense. Im so glad I found this video, It gave me a new insight on my friend's struggles and I feel like I can understand what they go through a little better ❤

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Oh my goodness I've cried over several comments but this one particularly got me. I love that you're so mindful about supporting your friend and I'm glad I get to be part of that

[@BunnlyGames]

The internet lets me forget my troubles in Japan. All my troubles cause me to forget things in an instant and that causes more problems. This video earned you a new sub!

[@BunnlyGames]

I need a phone :(

[@thedramaticherbalist]

In such a high stress world it's so cool that we have all these ways available to decompress!

[@koffizinhoMC]

This is such a lovely video, and somehow it appeared on my feed exactly the week and a half I've been struggling to make videos and other tasks due to intense physical pain and mental health, It's a horrible feeling not being able to get up from bed to play my favorite game or produce something my creative brain will be happy with, but this is a good reminder I'm not the only one who struggles with this. Thank you so much for opening your heart about it because it truly does help others realize they aren't alone in their daily struggles.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

I'm so glad you found it and that it resonates with you! Don't forget to let yourself rest (I know, easier said than done!) There is no shame in taking a breath

[@hypnojon32]

this came up on my feed and the title grabbed me. I'm also disabled and cannot walk very well or use both hands properly because of Cerebral Palsy. So I've made toggle everything in the game and one of the mouse button as forward and use my elbow to jump. I also found it very amazing to run and walk better in the game. I'm not an artist tho, so I usually end up looking for tutorials or I'll end up living in some sort of cube or circle house that s boring. I usually end up making a lot of scattered farms rather than mega builds. I struggle with depression and I feel isolated and alone a lot so your video really helped today. Another disabled minecrafter mentor/hero I enjoy watching is GTwith Scar

[@thedramaticherbalist]

That's quite a setup, so cool that you've been able to adapt it to your needs! I'm glad the video helped you feel less alone

[@heyna1185]

I’ve never seen a video by you before but this is really speaking to me. I‘m in pain everyday and while I haven‘t lost any mobility, I can relate to the section about having to be careful not to push yourself too hard and being held back by your body’s limitations. I‘m recovering from burnout and something that‘s really hard to swallow is that I‘ll probably never be able to work enough hours to make a living unless I get super lucky and find a job that I can fit into my life. I honestly don’t know how I’ll survive after my parents pass. I’m sure I’ll find a way somehow and hopefully it‘ll take a long time until then. Anyway, thank you for your kind words and I wish you all the best! 💚

[@thedramaticherbalist]

I feel you, facing the future is really scary when you're not able to be fully independent. I hope you find all support that you need

[@PhantomPeryton]

Despite being in my early 20s, I'm in the middle of dealing with my body declining on me. I have trouble walking around because I can't feel my legs well, I can't sing like I used to be able to due to something being wrong with my lungs and limiting my breath support, I can't physically write for more then a few minuets due to the pain it will cause it my wrists, there's just too many things going on to even keep up with. All of that has happened over about 2-3 years, but where were smaller things and signs before. Disability is a lot to grapple with, especially when you got to experience being able to do some of the stuff normally that you can't do now Its good to know that even through that we are all here playing Minecraft.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

I'm so sorry you're having to deal with all this, it's really scary to have happen to you. But yeah, here we are all playing Minecraft and connecting through all of the things that bring us to the game! Life is weird and scary and strange and beautiful

[@MV.]

I’m autistic, and coming across this video was nice. I think i still have some impostor syndrome to weave through around my struggles, especially today i think, that’s pretty on-theme. But i liked this

[@thedramaticherbalist]

I'm glad it was something you could find helpful for your brain!

[@analyzers9335]

This video is quite touching. Your honesty and openness are amazing !

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Thank you!!

[@puncakewiz]

i respect you so much for opening up about your situation, the "understanding" of dealing with perils and situations differently and at a slower or faster rate than everyone else should be universally accepted, even tough i am averagely physically capable i tend to progress and go through studies/studying at a much different rate and way than everyone else, as a result of that there were a miriad of misunderstandings in my education life, the concept of "productivity determines your worth" that a lot of people tends to share has been not easy for us, this video helped me recollect those thoughts and will make me feel more confident about sharing this idea to others, so thank you for making this, stay strong,

[@thedramaticherbalist]

I'm so glad you could relate and find more confidence because of the video!!

[@3Tips]

you are a inspiration to me. Enjoying life the best way we can is such a wonderful thing. You will go far with a positive mindset no matter what disability people have. Minecraft helps me avoid my own problems and disabilities I have with learning, but when I love something I try my best to overcome a challenge.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

I love that Minecraft can encourage us to keep trying things that are difficult for us! Glad you're here :)

[@marine-beats69]

we just got this recommended to us, and i just have to say that i relate to this a lot. i experience brain fog and chronic fatigue a lot, which makes it difficult to perform tasks and be on my feet for long without getting exhausted. minecraft has always been that sort of escape for us, and we really enjoy exploring and collecting and doing a lot more than we normally could. this video really spoke to me :] thank you

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Aw I'm really glad you found it and related! Well maybe not quite so much the related part, but it's so lovely seeing how many people use Minecraft as a safe and peaceful place!

[@ModeratelyTerrifyingHallway]

This is so nice that a video like this exists. I have AuDHD and a few other problems including being a bit physically limited (I don't think I'm physically disabled though? Idk) and I've always felt like I'm worse that everyone else, that I can't do things and it is *my* fault. My minecraft world, in comparison, is empty, besides me and mobs. There is no one who does thungs better than me, there's no one who tells me that I'm not doing good enough. I can leave the world and come back whenever I want to without any pressure from other people. I can procrastinate and forget about my projects without being punished for it. I can do things I want without the pain of having to do something with my hands, standing or walking. I don't have to cry every time I mess up, because no one eill punish me for it and I can always start again. My minecraft world is a safe place for me to exist. 🌻

[@ModeratelyTerrifyingHallway]

Let's just forget the part where I zoned out while watching this video, alright? Brain.exe stopped working :Þ

[@thedramaticherbalist]

I love that your world is such a peaceful space for you!! And hey, don't feel bad about brain crashes, they do that sometimes :D

[@mackenziedrake]

Minecraft has become my safe and creative space over the last couple of years as well. I'm not going through the kinds of things you are to the same extent, I've had times like you describe. Thank you for sharing this with us.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

It's lovely how we can connect over similar experiences even when they're not entirely the same! I'm loving how Minecraft connects people!!

[@Figaroma]

Just discovered your channel through this video- just want to say, thank you for being so positive and supportive of all of the people out there with disabilities. I may not have one myself, but its really nice to read through all these comments and seeing how people with disabilities are being uplifted with this message!! (Keep going strong, all of you)

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Thank you so much! It's so cool how this can connect all of us!

[@neurodivergentlily]

Stahhhhpp crying hurtssss (aka this was incredibly meaningful to me and I'm so glad you made this video and now I'm subscribed with no other context to your channel because I don't care what content you put out, I like your vibes). Seriously. Thank you.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

I'm so glad it was something that helped you feel seen

[@burntbeanies7886]

Very well spoken video. I've never personally gone through what you have, but having insight into this reality is very moving and it inspires me seeing how far you are able to go and create in this game despite your limitations. You're incredible, and I'm very glad youtube recommended me this out of the blue.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Aw, thank you! I'm glad you found it and are here!

[@TakodaMae]

Beautiful video! I went through 10 years of chronic illness and getting weaker and weaker before I finally found out what the problem was and started to stabilize. I relate so much to being too exhausted to move, and doing crazy things to squeeze a little more out of a broken body. I think people who haven't experienced it really don't understand how much Minecraft, video games, and content creation can help. It's a way to stay active while resting, be productive when you can't work, and find happiness when life is just unfair. We are not alone. 💖

[@thedramaticherbalist]

I love that the game can be a peaceful place for us and a way to connect with other people! *hugs*

[@Quartis]

Such an encouraging and well-made video. I often fall into the headspace that productivity gives me worth, so it's nice to hear your words. You're amazing!

[@thedramaticherbalist]

It's such a hard mindset to work our way out of!

[@mistycomet9760]

3:56 Isn't it strange? How the things that make us the loneliest are the most universal? Here's to Minecraft and hope. I hope your life improves. You are worthy of connection with others. And I send love and sympathy to you and all having similar experiences. (I thought this video was very well edited, by the way, especially the music at the end.)

[@thedramaticherbalist]

I feel like it's something we humans forget a lot! Thank you so much

[@hunnybon]

Minecraft is a comfort game for me and I have a lot of general anxiety problems that can easily be quelled, even if just for a little, by just playing on a world or with a modpack.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

I love that!!

[@minnevolved]

Wow… I can relate to a lot in this video. I’m legally blind, so I don’t face the same obstacles as yourself, but I often run into a lot that makes gaming difficult. And real life, of course. This video though is definitely a good reminder of why I play games and why I make content in the first place. I know you’ve probably heard this 1,000,000 1/2 times by now, but you are an absolute champion.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

It's so cool how we can all be brought together by different experiences that still bring us to the same places, like a really fantastic video game! Thanks for your kind words

[@IndigoatCafe]

I really sympathize. It feels like so many dreams and any semblance of a real-world social life were lost when my physical disability set in in my teenage years. Minecraft has meant so much to me lately, and I've wanted to make content to express that- A dream of mine is to one day be on a creator SMP and experience a sense of community through this virtual space where I can live, socialize, and explore like I've been barred from doing in the real world for so long.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

It's so difficult to navigate disability when you're young, like you said, so much gets lost from having a normal life. Enjoy figuring out the Minecraft content creation, and I hope it goes well for you!!

[@WaffleCat833]

Thank you for making this and sharing such vulnerable and raw feelings. I can relate, video games are how I find joy and adventure in life when most everything exhausts me as a disabled and chronically ill person. I appreciate this greatly, thank you for helping another person feel less alone.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

I'm glad you found this! I'm sorry you can relate so much but I'm glad we have access to things like games that can keep us sane

[@BRACE_The_Ace]

I can definitely relate. I have Cerebral Palsy. Gaming is also my escape & allows me to do things I'll never be able to do. I've made peace with that, but I still have my moments.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

I feel ya, making peace with our limits is definitely not linear. I'm glad games are a place of freedom for you!

[@nelind3]

Oh wow i cannot put into words the feeling after watching this. The connection with other people with similar experiences. The pain of knowing we all have to live through this kind of thing on the daily but also the hope and joy in knowing that despite everything we aren't alone. Is ... one heck of a feeling. It reminds me of the mirror scene in undertale "Despite everything. Its still you" despite the trials, hardships, pain and suffering I'm still me, we're still us, we're still here, we're not alone and we still matter. I'm not gonna pretend to know the feeling of your body giving out like it does for people with physical disabilities. But being autistic i still feel a deep connection with the feeling of pain from not being able to do "what i should be able to" but can't or "what i could at one point" but can't any more. It's a deeply painful, unmotivating feeling and it leaves you feeling alone. Alone with the pain and the struggle and alone with the feeling of inadequacy of not being "enough." But things like this video, other autistic people, other disabled people and communities around it even just in games at large. It brings a smile to my face. Not being alone any more. A melancholic one at times when im reminded of why we're all here but still ultimately a smile. Thank you so much for making this. I haven't felt this connected in experience with a person i don't know in ages. Minecraft, the community around it, and the places we and I make within and around it are safe places for me and many others. Thank you for being a part of that

[@thedramaticherbalist]

This is beautiful, thanks for the comment. I love that we get to have connection and community through this game, and I'm so thankful for everyone who has shown up here because of that

[@NotBunniesInTrenchcoat]

Words are hard, and though I would love to find the words to help you, I seem to have lost most of them at the moment, so I will do with the words I have with me. I sadly cannot pretend to know what all of the painting of your life looks like, but looking at the part that you show, I can say that though our struggles aren't the same, I can see similar colours on both of the paintings of our lives. I see a lot of your colours clearly, and a lot of them are beautiful. I struggle to see which of your colours are the best. The ones of your armour-clad determination, or the shininess of the creativity in your minecraft builds. I keep rewatching the ending of this video to find the right words to write, but I keep losing them to tears. Tears of joy for being understood. Thank you for reminding me of my humanity, even though it is unusual. I do not know what colours will be added to your painting in the future, but I hope they will be your favourite ones

[@thedramaticherbalist]

This is so beautiful thank you ToT

[@UnkownWonders]

Even though i can't relate to this extent, it's still wonderful regardless how you can express yourself in this beautiful game. That you found a way where you can enjoy your time and hopefully in the future there will be tools to help people out in similar situations to yours out more in doing things they love and want to try without having the constant pain to remind them of their own body limitations

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Thank you so much for the kind words!

[@PK5Dloks]

This is a really beautiful and thoughtful piece that will no doubt resonate with many out there, who may often feel isolated and alone from their disabilities. I really hope it helps you and others to feel more connected, and helps send a message to those who might not be aware. The courage to talk openly about it and to keep doing what you love despite the suffering it causes is truly admirable and brave ❤ Its amazing to have you in our community, and if there's anything I can do to make things easier for you, please let me know!

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Thank you so much

[@Blaineworld]

get this person a more powerful laptop now

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Haha thanks, I have a very kind friend who's working on that with me!!

[@Blaineworld]

@@thedramaticherbalist great!!! i hope you can play more comfortably with it.

[@kimkardashi-un2823]

I feel like this video came to me at the right time. Even doing what others find to be simple tasks take so much of energy that I feel like I am not doing enough. Productivity is not the same as being content with myself. I hear you and I appreciate this video!

[@thedramaticherbalist]

I'm glad it helped you! It's so hard when you can't even manage the simple things others can and I'm so sorry

[@bronsonstrock593]

Excellent video and amazing message. Thank you

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Thank youu

[@oolivero45]

It sounds like it's the same for a lot of people here, but whilst this is the first time I've come across your channel, it definitely won't be the last as I've subscribed after watching this video. I am also both physically disabled (long covid induced chronic fatigue & respiratory issues) and neurodivergent, and I use video games (especially Minecraft and other sandbox games such as stardew valley) as a way to escape and do things virtually which I simply can't do in real life any more. Disability affects us all differently, but it also gives us all a shared experience of pushing through hardship to achieve things that others often demean and put down as "easy", because they don't realise just how hard we have to work to overcome them. Thanks for making this video!

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Thanks for being here! I love that Minecraft can have this significance for so many of us!

[@ShadowPack90]

As someone who is also disabled, this video really resonated with me.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

I'm glad you found it

[@angry4rtichoke646]

Hey, you're great and not alone :-) I guess the reverse was more meaningful to hear, thanks for making this

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Aww thank you!!

[@Leonardo-cw1dd]

to an extent i feel ya. im autistic myself and minecraft is one of the escapes i got. never stop being you

[@thedramaticherbalist]

It's so cool we have this game that can mean so much to us!

[@Leonardo-cw1dd]

@@thedramaticherbalist yes indeed

[@M00N_IVY]

Ahhh here comes the tears! I cannot express how much I appreciate you being so real and authentic with this topic. I'm also disabled and to here someone voice similar struggles is both comforting and heartbreaking. Minecraft has always been a special interest of mine but since I'm autistic I find it incredibly hard to play consistently. Something about the game makes my brain very tired even though I enjoy it. But creators like you who create minecraft videos, help me enjoy minecraft in a way that my brain can handle when the majority of times I cannot play myself. Every word you spoke struck such a deep chord within me. Every year I feel it's harder and harder and harder to function and my life isn't ideal in ways right now. But I can't brute force through it and so majority of my days feel like I'm trying to keep it together and enjoy what I can. I wouldn't mind if you ever wanted to talk more about this because I feel your words and experience has encouraged me to keep going and has reminded me I'm only doing my best and I'm most definitely not alone. To those who are also disabled. It's not your fault. You aren't broken you just need more help to live a good life. I'm so sorry if you are hurting as well. You never deserved the pain and situations you may have been in or are in because of your disabilities. You deserve to have empathy, compassion, understanding and support. I wish you nothing but happiness and you are really strong. It may not go away, but it will get a bit easier with time. I love you.❤❤

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Your best is all you can do! And it looks different for everyone and that's okay. I'm sorry playing Minecraft is rough for you, but I love that watching Minecraft content can scratch that itch still!

[@M00N_IVY]

@thedramaticherbalist Thank you I appreciate that. Yeah it's really cool to see other people's stuff and I guess it makes it more special when I do get to play.

[@Zetaaktion]

Im disabled too. and its just so crushing to realize that you will never be able to be like everyone, and live normal life.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

It's a really difficult thing to face - you're not alone

[@FreddieStarWars]

I can't relate, I've never seen your videos before, but I'm proud of you for sharing this, good luck in the future. 💜

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Aw that's so sweet, thank you so much!

[@agentlua]

This is so well formulated I was actually shocked to see that this doesn't have more views!

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Thank you for saying so!

[@Otacanthus]

Sometimes I beat myself up over my disabilities, feeling like maybe I'll never recieve, or deserve the support I need to live comfortably by the government. Feeling like "Maybe I'm just not trying enough" Even though I've been working with people to getting a job for over half a decade without it ever working out. So hearing this is comforting. I have a hard time communicating with people, and I get exhausted quickly. Whenever I would get some (unpaid) work, I'd get motion sick and be close to throwing up (or actually throw up) as I get off the bus. Thinking "Surely this is just what everyone goes through" and kept trying for long work days if I didn't feel bad enough to take a sick day. And I have to remind myself of that sometimes, that my body is frail, my mind doesn't work like the average person, that I do need and deserve any help I can get access to. And just try to enjoy the things I'm able to. So, thank you.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

We always work to be our best but our best can't be by anyone else's standards because we all have different needs and abilities! Be gentle with yourself, I know it's hard to not push yourself far beyond what you should sometimes

[@cutebutrandom]

Feel the exact same way as I have a neuromuscular disease and some just don’t understand why I play games like Minecraft so much.

[@thedramaticherbalist]

I'm glad the internet gives us people who relate

[@amberqueen01]

this isnt really relevant to the video but i loved the use of alpha in as the background music! one of my fav mc tracks fr

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Mine too ToT

[@Tech1ty]

I sorta relate. Maybe. Not physical, neither do I escape from it, but I have allergies and every meal with others is a sad, painful reminder of my allergies. But I so very much hope I can grow out of them before I graduate. I don't want to have this period of my life covered in allergy memories

[@thedramaticherbalist]

Oh man, allergies can be so exhausting to navigate! I hope they ease up for you, but don't forget to take all the good parts of the memories with you!!

[@Tech1ty]

@@thedramaticherbalist I hope so too! Have a good day my friend!

[@temi19]

I was randomly recommended this video, but I am extremely happy I found it. I have the only fatal version of Ehlers Danlos Syndrome, the one that affects the cardiovascular system, and knowing I can plan out a day only for me to have something pop out of place or for me having difficulty walking. I find it very easy to slip into a mindset of being angry and bitter at the world, but every day I fight those urges to give up to try to lead a happy and positive life. I don't know what you have but it sounds rough. But seeing you also fight the fight of trying to just be happy and live your life makes me happy for you too. I know you don't know me, but I have a lot of experience with computers and can maybe even help you squeeze out as much performance as possible if you'd ever like. Just let me know and I'd love to get into contact

[@thedramaticherbalist]

EDS is so scary to navigate, I can't imagine the strain that a fatal version puts you under! Thanks for the offer, I'm surrounded by computer people and have been squeezing out every last drop of performance for years 😅 it's just getting old at this point and it was never the best computer for the production software I've run on it hehe

[@temi19]

@@thedramaticherbalist Ha ha! I get it! My only recommendation would be to maybe try KDenlive if you're not already using it, as it's designed to be used on weaker hardware. But I'm really happy to hear you get lots of support!