Misophonia Explained - The Science of Why Sounds Trigger You

[@TheMonkeyV]

when you get a massive wave of anxiety just from the title, you know you're in the right spot.

[@ShekinahGwaii]

My latest philosophy is that I'm not maladusting to 'normal' sounds, it's that people have accepted an unhealthy level as a society. This is an observed quality, when the culture doesn't support something, like being sensitive, racially tolerant, ecosystem minded -- they make up terms for us. I'm over it. Love this, thanks! 🎉

[@TheKrispyfort]

I was never allowed to "indulge" in being annoyed by what other people did while it was always mandated that I was never to annoy other people

[@TheSarcasticSiamese]

@@TheKrispyfort THIS

[@pippaseaspirit4415]

True.

[@LaGuera2858]

This is also my experience. I didn't realize this fact till I was abt 32ish. It really explains years of unhappiness.

[@SquiddyHiggenbottom]

When I'm upset by a sound someone is making, it's my responsibility to find a way to cope with it, even when it is difficult or impossible to do so. When other people are upset by a sound I'm making... it's my responsibility to stop making it, even when it is difficult or impossible to do so. My least favorite double standard.

[@tjw9985]

@@SquiddyHiggenbottom I also grew up with this. I also got "I'm Too/over sensitive"

[@jennyferNumberone]

Misophonia issues are real & it's horrible 🥺 ... so many people don't understand the struggle .... ps, Thank you Orion for all you do 😃🖖

[@Bananaspie]

I actually knew I had misophonia long before I knew I was autistic. Sometimes I get so angry about the distress I experience from sounds other people make that I feel extremely hostile. I have gleefully boasted about the day people who blast their car radios will eventually lose their hearing because I felt they deserved it for what they were doing to me. Yeah, really, really hostile. Even just a little while ago today some loud music was coming from across the street in another building and I couldn't find my noise cancelling headphones at first, and I was FRANTIC to find my means of escape. It sucks. Even just snoring. I can barely stand sleeping in bed with my little girl because she snores, even though I just want to snuggle her with all my love otherwise. I can hear it even with noise cancelling headphones on and it makes me crazy. It is awful.

[@Green_Roc]

Strong relate! Some cars drive by where I sleep at night, and I wake up to my chest painfully throbbing, because someone had some music going in their car as they drive by. I grit my teeth, waiting for their light to turn green so it will get away from my home! Literally happening right now as I type, 2:25am, boom throb boom throb boom. GO AWAY NOISEY HUMANS! So angry.

[@tamberjune]

I wear earplugs and noise cancelling headphones and I do a guided relaxation with relaxing music sounds in the background. All of this can help me fall asleep but it's so tough.

[@BrittneyHillsbery]

The part about CBT that always confounds me is the how reframing is somehow magically meant to change the sensations I experience in my body. LIke sure I understand my triggers now and can calmly explain them to others, but the triggers keep happening all around me and thinking about them does not lessen their occurrence nor grant me control over their impact.

[@Green_Roc]

So accurate Brittney! I agree that changing the perception/thinking does not change the feeling of the pain! For example, changing how I feel about being poked with a needle doesnt really change how it feels to be poked with a needle. I can ignore how I feel until my body shuts down, and my body has shut down from too much noise. "Thinking" a different way doesnt change how my body reacts. My body has and can and will take action without "me", like when I almost drowned. I can hold my breath for some time, but eventually my body will force me to breathe.

[@BrittneyHillsbery]

@@Green_Roc Thank you for sharing I'm going to be using that holding my breath metaphor as a shortcut to explain this to others because that perfectly encapsulates the experience.

[@duerremueller3609]

I have severe misophonia that genuinely makes it so hard for me to maintain relationships with certain people and has driven me to crisis before. Thanks for covering this.

[@EyemsoarnauSouporsor]

I can't handle my sister's voice...

[@duerremueller3609]

@@EyemsoarnauSouporsor This is me with one of my friends and it's hard because I feel so guilty for it. I've hid it for over 10 years :(

[@suecollins357]

I live on a farm where we host and feed travellers in exchange for work. A lovely young woman from Hong Kong stayed with us and thoroughly enjoyed our fresh food life. Unfortunately she showed her appreciation by slurping, chewing loudly etc. We understood it was a cultural thing but holy cow I chose the furthest seat from her at every meal. Felt like a jerk coz she was such a sweetie which irritated me even more 😔

[@II.Justinian]

My mother eat very loud it cause me Real pain when i hear the sound.

[@KampfgruppeDirleganger]

One day at my apartment, after having two exams on the same day and little sleep, the noise outside had gotten me to the point where my meltdown made the girl next door think I was killing somebody. Got swat raided, but explained the situation to the cops and they were actually understanding and I was out of cuffs and in my final class for the day

[@eliannafreely5725]

I upvoted you because I can't give you a hug. Being swat raided would basically be the worst thing that could happen while in a meltdown. 🫂

[@TheKrispyfort]

Whoa 😢 🫂

[@mychiIdfreeass]

"SWAT raided"... Na klar doch 😂

[@tiffknox6158]

This is amazing. Thanks for the reminder of what could happen if someday I let loose the yell of built up frustration.

[@user-ye1go6hw9r]

I explain it to people that don't know like this: "Ya know when you're holding hands with someone and they are absent-mindedly rubbing their thumb on your skin and it's fine until you notice it but once you notice it it's like they are using a chainsaw to rub away the skin down to the bone and you cannot get away from it fast enough?" "Yeah it's like that except there isn't a 'once you notice it' waiting period."

[@julietteferrars3097]

Yes! This is such a good analogy.

[@MVance-k9p]

I apologize for the loud text.

[@kathyinwonderlandl.a.8934]

😊

[@resourcedragon]

There was a nurse recording various data about me at the hospital and she was an unusually quiet typist, so I thanked her.

[@TheeOldest]

There’s a large factory nearby that drones and whirs and rumbles 24/7 that no one else seems to even notice. I feel it vibrating my house. I have had times of rage over it. Also thinking of writing a descent-into-madness short story based on my experience 🤨

[@TheSarcasticSiamese]

I feel seen. Instant rage. I feel downright hom!cid@l increasingly more of the time. It can trigger meltdown if I can't get away. I do use Calmer Flare buds that 'flatten' or alter sounds enough. Though heading to noise cancelling headphones all the time. So many things trigger now.

[@eliannafreely5725]

Do you live in the city? I felt this way when I was trapped in an apartment with people above and below me, and the street sounds outside, because there was no refuge.

[@joshuazapzalka1952]

A lot more sounds irritate me as I've gotten older, but nothing makes me feel that instant fight to the death rage like the sound of whistling. Just writing the word pissed me off lol.

[@TheSarcasticSiamese]

@joshuazapzalka1952 oh geez 😹 that sucks

[@TheSarcasticSiamese]

@joshuazapzalka1952 I've noticed that too. The older I get, the more things can trigger, and the easier sounds can trigger. 😒

[@TheSarcasticSiamese]

@@eliannafreely5725 surprisingly no. I live in a wee little village, but there tends to be lots of yard work, building work, and maintenance work (mostly tree work bc we live near wildfire zones). Also, a family member watched political stuff and even though it's in another room I can still hear it sometimes and it's anxiety making. Also Rump's voice is an instant rage trigger sound.

[@SarahofNewTerra]

Thanks for talking about this Orion, my gf helped me realize I was suffering from this a few yrs. ago… when I shared it w/ my mom she had a major epiphany too. There is a serious sense of shame for feeling SO angry, avoidant & judgmental about it! When I was a kid I would read in class on the floor away from everyone else, w/ hands over my ears. Sometimes I feel like I’m living w/ headphones on even when I’m eating, & often to avoid my own eating sounds as well.😳

[@fleachamberlain1905]

I'm so relieved to be understood, I'm weepy. Thanks for the video. Idling engines and other artificial, droning, repetitive sounds and mouth noises, including people whispering to each other, cause me to feel, a completely involuntary, rage. I do find seeing it makes it worse, but I didn't know that was connected. I now think I also get hyperacusis. For example, "normal" volume, high pitched singing feels like I'm being stabbed in the ears. It is actually painful. I had been lumping this under misophonia until now.

[@AshleyReneeVlog]

I plan to show this video to my entire family tonight! In a house with both parents being autistic and half of the seven children being autistic, let’s just say the misophonia is in overdrive 😅 Thank you for making such a clear and relatable video to help!

[@melissagodwin1594]

Welp, this is me in a very painful nutshell. It’s honestly sad that feeling so seen right now is almost making me want to cry. But it’s better than not being seen. Thanks, mate. Oh, and about the difference between noises *others* make and the noises *we* make. I’ve actually been thinking about this the last couple days, and I think it has to do with control. If someone else is making the noise, then we have no control over it. But if we’re making it, we do. It’s like pulling off a bandaid. Some things are just more tolerable if we’re doing them personally.

[@AidanMencer]

Same here. I can't handle it when my little brother stims by snapping his fingers, but I'll stand there snapping away without a care in the world.

[@LEO91968]

@@melissagodwin1594 Absolutely!!! If you can control the volume, it's totally different!!!❤️

[@gloriacresswell8052]

I hadn't known others felt this way. Noone else I knew showed the same signs of distress in sights and sounds that caused my extreme distress that I was told was not good to express. I don't think I have had a nausea free day. It's averting my eyes or leaving the uncomfortable situation then seeking to relax. Then there's the textures and trying to eat. My Mom just learned this last year of the discomfort I lived in.... I'm now 58! I really don't know how the Lord has gotten me through all this, but He still has me here! 😊

[@gloriacresswell8052]

Washing dishes by hand.... Not being able to get all the food off, first, and then touching things you can't see in the water.... Not fond of cooking, either, but my cooking is safer for me.

[@gloriacresswell8052]

I also had no idea that I might possibly be considered autistic when I struggled with these things, until these last couple of years. I just knew I didn't feel comfortable in my own skin.

[@gloriacresswell8052]

Just ran away from the dinner table because my husband was crunching on a bone.....yelled *I love you!" over my shoulder to him as I fled. He thankfully said, "Sorry!!!!'. 😂😅

[@mammajamma4959]

thank you for speaking what my son and I just experienced this week. Nice that we arent alone

[@NidusFormicarum]

I don't get angry; I feel more and more stressed-out and anxious and afraid. Then comes sleep deprevation and all the other stuff. Can't concentrate and do my daily stuff. I am not talking about temporary sounds, but when the stressors go on for weeks or months in a row. Then comes meltdowns and destructivity, feelings of hopelessness etc.

[@camiioan822]

I deal with this and the way you explain it makes a lot of sense as to why sometimes I can feel things and don't always realize that it is related to sound, and I find sounds like chewing, pen tapping, slurping, sniffling really really frustrating and I get really disgusted by it, sometimes to the point where I get anxious or even angry!

[@windalfalatar333]

Thank you!! I'm experiencing this at the present time from my neighbours.

[@kathyinwonderlandl.a.8934]

Oh man neighbor noise is the worst.

[@NJP76]

@@kathyinwonderlandl.a.8934 Absolutely! Especially my neighbors who never seem to stop with the "music". The rage is real. I have tried to "get over it" but try as I may, it still triggers me.

[@NidusFormicarum]

I have to move. Can't live here and I am not alone. The music has stopped but all the small noises are even worse. If it just temporary I get annoyed, but it doesn't make my daily life unbearable. This also goes for drilling in a wall are people talking outside. Where I have used to live this has never been a problem because I knew that it was not going to continue. It's when the sounds never end, maybe ten hours a day. And I even get woken from my sleep in the middle of the night when they start. It can be as mundane as people walking in the apartment above me. Even with ear-plugs I still can't sleep. When it was as worst, I hadn't slept for 40 hours. I went outside in the wind and stayed out the entire day without enough clothes. It was freezing cold, but I was afraid. I trying to get help and support but people don't understand the issues. That:s the most depressing part.

[@windalfalatar333]

@@kathyinwonderlandl.a.8934 I agree. Because you can't retreat any further than your home. You can quit a job or (as an adult) leave a school. Moving house is much more complicated. You've literally got your back against the wall (of your flat).

[@windalfalatar333]

@@NJP76 Music is terrible. Talking/arguing voices are terrible. Children running with their heels on the floor is terrible. Television is terrible. Drilling is terrible. Bowling balls on the floor is terrible. Music is probably the worst. A monotone machine with exactly the same monotonous murmur at a low pitch - so long as there are no vibrations - actually isn't that bad because it's predictable and never varies. Monotony and predictability are good, soothing, reassuring. Children, drilling, music are mutable, changing and truly stressfully homicidal.

[@Ar4tic_Blizzard1626]

one very difficult part of this is when you try to explain the sheer pain this type of noise sensitivity is then people just say "Yeah i get a bit like that when its really loud" it just feels dismissive

[@resourcedragon]

Or being told that I should be "more tolerant". I explained that they should have been grateful that I wasn't banging my head to a pulp against the wall.

[@resourcedragon]

I think this is the best video about misophonia I've ever seen. It's all there, the triggers, (you, Orion and I have a *_lot_* of triggers in common) the anger, the distress, the fact that those sounds are a form of torture for us. And how the visual plays into the auditory - I can't watch people making those triggering sounds. I sometimes make the triggering noises as s form of retaliation (I normally don't believe in 'an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth') but mostly I try to avoid them, I'm not too keen on them even when they're emanating from me. You're right about saying that things that work for neurotypical people don't always work for autistic people. Fun speculation: I think Shakespeare either had misophonia or he knew about it. The witch's description in Macbeth of her encounter with the wife of the ship's captain, "The master o' the Tiger" is: "A sailor's wife had chestnuts in her lap, And mounch'd, and mounch'd, and mounch'd:--"Give me," quoth I: "Aroint thee, witch!" the rump-fed ronyon cries." The 'And mounch'd, and mounch'd, and mounch'd' is _exactly_ the way someone with misophonia would describe the action, along with describing the woman as a rump-fed ronyon.

[@NidusFormicarum]

For the record, I recently smashed a window in my apartment in a desperate effort to get in touch with my landlord because my neighbors was patying above me for two weeks in a row. Some days the police was there too so something is going on. I have smelled smoke of drugs in my apartment. Small bounces, talk, motor-bikes outside, but the small repeated sounds are worse than load music even. Sometimes I hide in the bathroom. Sometimes I get into shutdown on the floor not moving until the sounds have stopped.

[@Green_Roc]

I'm almost in tears reading your story. I have passed out for 6 days earlier this year, had to be hospitalized to get fluids into my body, and I had passed out because the upstairs neighbor was being too noisy. We surely do need more awareness of the damage and life-threatening scenarios caused by noises from other humans. I offer virtual hugs of comfort in a big feeling of solidarity if you wish to have some. No obligations here, I'm often too chatty for people so feel free to skip, up to you. I feel I can relate to being on the floor in your home, a reflex/response to the noises that surround us, yes me too, many times, with some involuntary head bashing. When I sleep, I can be found sleeping in a closet under blankets and between two 6ftx3ft soundproof panels I got from "ClearSonic" (which are only 50-70% soundproof so they arent perfect). I still wake up screaming because of a dog bark or some noise from some human outside my home. "Move out" some tell me. Moving out, is soo not easy. I am moving because of the neighbor noises, and hoping the new place isnt just moving into a noiser home. Already spent many months to get all the paperwork filled out, waiting for other companies again and again and several months to get a doctor note for 'reasonable accommodation' forms completed and accepted with government approval as I am on section 8. Finally months and months gone by, I'm so close to getting a Top floor apartment next month, away from the walking paths of leaf blowers and chatty dog walkers. Not perfectly soundproof, but more distance from the aggravating noises of a first floor apartment. I wish landlords understood our pain, instead of dismissing it like mine has done: "It's an apartment". Yes, yes it is sir, and I am autistic.

[@SeriouslyJaded]

Misophonia is the bane of my life. ANC headphones have been a lifesaver.

[@heat420_7]

Omg, im so glad i clicked this one! TY, Orion ❤

[@AutisticDutchie]

Spot on, Orion! It’s so good to realize it’s not just me.

[@ronawaldon9060]

Totally get this. I was sitting next to guy at a course the other day who was nose breathing heavily 😬 Totallly DISGUST. At other times, RAGE 😤

[@DustinRea]

I can only own wall clocks without the ticking second hand. And I can listen to noise like a flowing river or rain on a tin roof and it's soothing, but other noises like someone clicking a pen, or a dog chewing on a beef bone on a hardwood floor 😵‍💫 I love hearing someone sing, but I cringe when someone is partially singing to something in their headphones

[@tomasvoldrich]

5:00 who hates how whispering in microphone sounds ?

[@mkb7013]

Meeeee

[@Green_Roc]

18:57 Oh I know about that with the plates and silverware thing! Can be awfully painful to hear! I had a friend whom had major issues with the sound of metal utensils and glass bowls. I bought plastic utensils and dishware to accommodate his sensory needs.

[@annab3184]

I think of myself as quite an erudite person who spends way too much time online learning things, but Orion always teaches me something new! Thank you for that!

[@joshuazapzalka1952]

Up until 2 years ago I just thought i was crazy. I've told therapists about it over the years and have just gotten this look in return that suggested they just thought i was a psycho, and tried to get me to take an anger management class. The fact that I'm not in jail is evidence of my anger management skills. I've dealt with this my whole life, I'm better at management of my anger than anyone who's ever suggested it to me lol.

[@eliannafreely5725]

"The fact that I'm not in jail..." ❤ Preach! The rage that the sound causes isn't like the anger you might feel because of thoughts that can be therapized. It is the expression of direct neurological stimulation. A stove doesn't burn you less because you manage your thoughts about it.

[@windalfalatar333]

9:15 This also I completely agree with: It builds. You have a certain resilience. Like a flood wall in Holland. Then the noise goes on and on: up and down, unpredictably and never ending, yet not a monotone. The flood wall eventually breaks, and you have been destroyed.

[@placeholder24678]

I work in an office where there is chewing, many pen clickers, mulitple simultaneous conversations, keyboard clicking, morning show radio, whistling, humming, people not tying up their boots properly so they jingle while walking, sniffing, burping, etc. I need to wear my headphones almost all the time in order to function.

[@resourcedragon]

And then they wonder why people want to work from home!!!

[@placeholder24678]

@resourcedragon after enduring 6 months in that environment, I realised I was autistic and I'm in high autistic burnout. I was able to get headphone privilege and will soon push for some work from home days.

[@tiffknox6158]

I was getting anxious just reading this. Thank God for the headphones.

[@cristinaroe2166]

Orion. They don't care if we're not living in this world. I have had to self isolate. People just tell me to put up and shut up. I have tried telling people. They do not listen or want to listen. Or they will just laugh and say I just need to tolerate it. Yet if I say, would you like me to scrape my keys along your car, watch how tolerant THEY are. No, there's nothing in it for them to change, so they don't. I have two files of coping strategies. Every day is a struggle. The worst thing is constantly having to explain myself even though it doesn't penetrate their brains because of their total lack of empathy. They honestly DON'T believe me. It's like constant gaslighted. I ask the Holy Spirit every day to endure the rubbish attitudes of others. If someone told me they had an issue, even if I didn't understand, I would take it seriously. In certain situations, I just need to walk out without saying a word because it won't be pretty if I do. It doesn't even make sense.

[@Secret_Soul_Survivor]

OMG Orion, everything you described and the immense annoyance/rage you experience is real for me too. The whole eating sounds, 'sniffing and sniffling' 😂, chewing - god I can't stand ppl who chew gum especially with their mouths open😤 also that, drawing back of phlegm and swallowing it, especially when on a microphone, is unbearable. I have a favourite KZbinr, that must suffer chronic allergies or this is a really disgusting habit, she does it chronically thru every video and I'm holding back the dry heaving every time. I remember as a student, and not diagnosed, sitting for exams and going quietly insane over the dude outside whipper snipping, the buzz of fluoro lights, and YES the PEN TAPPING😩 and no-one could relate to me afterwards describing this. And what happened to libraries???? Unbelievable, the noise now, kids and babies and goddam everything else going on, no place for research, study or a quiet read. There's so much in my everyday environment, I have owned dogs for decades - yet I can't stand barking; I can't stand babies crying either - yet I was blessed to have a child who ended up with ASD so very different but 13 weeks premmie he cried a lot. He suffered severe depression and anxiety and SH behaviours, tragically ended his life last xmas at 18yo, trying to break up with his 1st girlfriend. The tragedy of not being able to protect our developmentally delayed kids on the spectrum, once they turn 18, is both heartbreaking and enraging. Then there's the smells... but that's another video😁 Cheers, Orion, thanks from a late-diagnosed autistic woman in beautiful QLD - sunny one day and pouring the next☀⛈⛅😎

[@laura5425]

Oh my gosh, all the years in school... Especially during school trips. Me lying awake and listening to all the shuffling breathing and snoring tiil 3 am and being totally exhausted ^^ Thankfully I use earplugs nowadays - wouldn't survive without...And I was only able to learn in the university library because I continuously listened to my favorite post rock band ^^ This video is so relatable. Thank you for this well informed and funny eye opener. Actually I tried to get used to a white noise machine. Most of the available sounds trigger me or my brain just gets stuck to the nice nature sounds until the timer turns it off (with an awkward speaker sound), but I can't actually seem to fall asleep...

[@peterkitchener6389]

I knew I had this well before I was diagnosed autistic. I also know I'm in the right place when just the verbal descriptions offered by Orion in the video begin to trigger me haha. Great video, thanks so much for all your content Orion.

[@mikehayes4133]

Sniffles and sniffs have always bugged me. During exams in college, I used to put an earplug in my right ear. I'd cover the other ear with my free hand, with my elbow on the desk. This had the advantage of looking "normal." I don't think anyone ever noticed the earplug. Worked like a charm.

[@tdc3298]

I totally understand. It's so difficult 😭thank you Orion

[@windalfalatar333]

30:35 This technique is used a lot. I used it in drama school and therapy.

[@CAM-fq8lv]

Laughed my hole out. Too relatable. Thanks Orion.

[@charlottekylin4169]

My dad made little grunting noises when he ate... My ex would clean her teeth with a floss pick for 30 minutes after dinner.... Someone watching tv in a different room or other apartment.... The neighbor's kid's garage band playing on Sunday afternoon when I was trying to wind down.... On a plane hearing someone else's cheap headphones..... The boom cars stopped at the corner stop light..... I realized I'm autistic when I was 72, and didn't learn about misophonia for a while after that. When I did I realized that I wasn't crazy for being 'too sensitive'; one therapist told me I was being controlling. Over the years my reactions have gotten less severe, but they're still there. I use a noise cancelling headset while I sleep that plays binaural beats so I don't have to hear traffic noises or walkers talking. Helps me sleep better too.

[@resourcedragon]

Interesting, I found out about misophonia, which I definitely have, long before I started to find out that I might be autistic (I'm not formally diagnosed but I have my suspicions.)

[@jenniferapelt7163]

One of our dogs is a really loud slurpy licker and I have to yell at him to stop licking himself because I can’t handle the sound of it!! Sometimes I’ll put my headphones on so I don’t have to listen to it!

[@placeholder24678]

One of our dogs likes to lick his bed for about half an hour before laying down while the other dog likes to chew on her toys. It is extremely difficult to keep my sh*t together when they are both doing it at the same time.

[@jenniferapelt7163]

@ Lol! Aaaghhh…I can’t imagine!

[@windalfalatar333]

6:27 I agree completely: The rage is an extreme evasion method. You just want the the sound to stop for the Love of All the Gods. The rage is like an aircraft launching a decoy flare at an incoming missile. You just want to get away.

[@TooMuchADHDMillennial]

15:08 lols, here in the Midwest we use sniffles/sniffling. I feel the pain of understanding which word to use! Side note. This video is so helpful as a person with a loved one who experiences this. I finally understand it and plan on talking with them and apologizing for my past responses to them. Live, learn, repair, improve.

[@FORDYI]

I havent watched the full video yet, but i know how bad misophonia can be. My girlfriend at the time few years ago developed a sniffing habit after falling ill from a holiday. When she came back and stayed over once, it bothered me to the point where it was stopping me from sleeping, and that was the point of no return. From then onwards i couldnt be around her for very long without getting triggered. We had already been together for at least a year. It killed any intimacy. I couldnt sit and watch anything with her without feeling like i wanted to explode. The cinema, travelling, etc, any time there was a quiet environment and she was sniffing, i was irate. We tried to work through it but nothing worked and it just got progressively worse on my end where we eventually slept in seperate rooms and soon after split up. At the time i didn't really know why i found it so annoying, it just was and i would do anything to avoid it. There have been other things which trigger me as well like barking dogs,but losing a good thing like that relationship still haunts me and hurts me so much. I hope some day i can work through this fully. It spikes more with anxiety or other issues in my life but overall i still wish i could have handled things better between us. I sympathise with all neurodiverse people with audio sensory issues.

[@44070M]

I saw your reaction when Taylor from Mom on the Spectrum was typing. 😄

[@windalfalatar333]

This is an extremely good video.

[@BlertaPupu]

Just want to say, from my perspective as someone with severe social anxiety, a lot of these sounds that you talked about (clearing throat, repetitive movements, probably even louder chewing, "sniffels" or just irregular louder breathing in general, clicking pens/table tapping/feet tapping) are signs of emotional non-well being. I think a lot of autistic folk have hyperempathy, so it might very well be a reason for their discomfort that they relate to this behaviour so much. Because I'm just trying not to go insane in social situations and those are copes and regulation techniques, but they already cause discomfort to NT people, so it must be a very emotional experience for people with hyper empathy. Another one of those examples of "if we could just be honest with each other I could relax quicker and we would both suffer less". 🤬 society and social norms honestly.

[@MVance-k9p]

I have a neighbor that's OCD and he uses his leafblower three times a week. I have difficulty with the sound, it's worse and causes rage because it's unnecessary.

[@Fizziepop]

Thank you! This was fun. Physiological. "Fizzy-o logical" ❤

[@melissaneugebauer113]

Super validating video !! One autistic KZbinr who’s content I really enjoy is almost unwatchable for me because of their mouth noise 😢 actually I do have to shut off their video most of the time. Kind of ironic huh. Anyway thanks for this. I think it’s going to be helpful to send to people who want to learn what I go through with my misophonia

[@tamberjune]

I can be triggered by my own loud eating noises. Its super frustrating. Thnaks for helping me feel validated. The comments are great thanks forngiving us a space to share and feelnless alone. ❤😊

[@mkb7013]

I’ve always struggled with this. My dad had it as well.

[@launacasey6513]

I haven't heard too many people talk about humming being a misophonia trigger. I have someone in my office that just mindlessly hums and it drives me berserk! But of course I get full of rage and then I'm incapable of having a calm discussion about it. She's probably humming from a happy place, likes music, etc., so it makes me feel even worse that I want to scream at her.

[@resourcedragon]

Humming can definitely be a misophonia trigger.

[@cornishmaid9138]

My dear husband is mindful of my reaction to noises. He will warn me if he’s going to make loud noises, or he’ll gently knock when he enters through the back door, which can make a racket, in my mind. Vacuum cleaners are banned. A knock at the door can set off intense anxiety and anger, as do phone calls. Sniffing, tapping, slurping, gulping a drink, chewing foods, winds me up.

[@DustinRea]

I'm the same way with vacuum cleaners. The only way I can deal with it is if I'm doing the vacuuming. So it's a simple solution, I just do that chore.

[@Hydrangea1971]

Soo relatable!! Even you describing the sounds made me cringe! I'm 53 Now and starting diagnostic interviews for myself, now my 2 children have a diagnosis of being neurodivergent.

[@farsouthfungi]

Your expressions are exactly how it makes me feel! I think when other ppl doing it maybe is a feeling of having no control over the sound happening? Also I am more reactive when I am already stressed. RAGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 🤣🥰 Oh man...I worked in public libraries for years and apparently it is going to get worse...they planning more for laptops and devices for good reasons, yes, but they just do not get it and they never ask!

[@Secret_Soul_Survivor]

My experience with CBT was unsuccessful over the years for the reasons you said.

[@windalfalatar333]

17:49 What I, and I think everyone, did when I was at uni in the 1990s (King's College London) was take notes by pen and paper. That should be natural, and enforced, today also.

[@trinasmith2792]

My therapist introduced me to what misophonia is. I totally have this. I couldn’t figure, why I was affected by sounds.

[@AmberHeard3]

Yes, to all of it!

[@lindasapiecha2515]

Ive suffered severly from this condition since i was 8yrs old😢

[@kathyinwonderlandl.a.8934]

Sorry that must be awful. It doesn’t bother me I don’t have this but I have the same reactions but it’s smells that effect me more than anything.

[@MVance-k9p]

The somatosensory cortex also triggers the amygdala adding and amplifying the emotional content to the sound.

[@NidusFormicarum]

Yes and thus you get overexcited and afraid as well. With anxiety and stress comes fear.

[@elisabethvanderhulst8669]

Tomorrow I have an appointment at my GP to clean my ears. I can choose between a kind of small vacuum cleaner or cleaning with water. Both cause such a terrible noise that I almost faint.

[@MVance-k9p]

@elisabethvanderhulst8669 I use cbd oil to help with sound and light sensitivity. I also find a point of focus. That could be a person that's with me or a visual item like a handheld light toy. Most of the time using fingertip stimulation with a spiky ring or some other texture you enjoy, the somatosensory cortex is calmed and helps reduce overstimulation. I usually start a few minutes before the stressful situation and continue stimming during the event. Fingertip stimulation works best for environmental stimuli and emotional intensity. Good luck finding what helps.

[@av9049-e7l]

Not related but I would just like to point out that if you talk in your lower tunes, it's incredible relaxing. Your bass notes sound so good if you talk.

[@InterDivergent]

I've definitely got Phonophobia. I hate making or receiving phone calls too 😉. I don't experience emotions to sounds, however one sound might take all my focus away from other sounds, like Jenn typing on her keyboard.

[@cmdaug]

I watch comedy clips with my kids during dinner time to avoid the pain and rage that chewing sounds causes for me.

[@resourcedragon]

That's one of the things that annoys me about those people who want "family dinners". Or worse, some of the more controlling ones from some traditional societies where they have family dinners and no one talks during the meal, so that everyone can be even more exquisitely tortured by the mastication noises.

[@kavehkavehkaveh]

hi Orion Kelly and I'm Autistic, im also autistic and i would like to thank you for my background noise for my 30 page math essay.

[@mariaalejandrahongbeirute878]

I love your content 😁you always make me feel "more normal" I've alway thought how awful I am for hating people who whistle, tap or sniffle ... just typing about it makes me angry/anxious

[@Green_Roc]

16:45 Keyboard sounds in my home with two other autistic people: soothing noise, as one of us falls asleep to, another is pleased with the sounds, and me, hardly registering the sounds, completely unbothered. FeelsBadMan that keyboard noise is so triggering for you Orion. Dont visit my home, I would advise, as two to four keyboards are actively used on a daily basis.

[@Boobatz490]

Thanks, video was really helpful.

[@Ozubura]

I have terrible misophonia for sounds that involve harsh shrills such as pencils and chalk writing, sandpapering, and other frictional sounds to the extent that it causes me severe pain and discomfort. I hated school because that’s all they used and was so happy when they changed to expo marker boards and erasable ink pens. The only pencils I can write with are paper mate mechanical pencils as for some reason they don’t make those shrill sounds. I used to have to make loud squishing sounds with the saliva in my mouth to cover my teeth as it’d feel like they were about to shatter in my mouth and I was terribly bullied because of it even by a few teachers who didn’t understand my sensory overload. Nowadays I barely ever have to deal with shrill sounds, and now just leave the room or put in noise cancelling headphones and put on loud music. Unlike when I was a kid, now if I explain my misophonia to someone, they’re pretty chill about it. It’s why I still hate going to the dentist for cleaning as the tools they use literally make me feel like I’m being tortured and my dentist tries to keep the suction loud, plays music, and keeps the water on while they’re cleaning because they can tell it helps my misophonia (I also have tactile sensitivity so the drilling and scraping are literally painful) but I’d rather deal with it because I care about my dental hygiene.

[@fleachamberlain1905]

20:28 Seeing people tapping on their phone screens, though they're actually out of earshot, is one that triggers my misophonia.

[@freetipuk]

I have this - it runs in my family.

[@Treehat]

I have quite a few of the Misophonia stuff but the main one is eating sounds, in my classroom at college (where you are not allowed to eat). People sometimes eat in there e.g., teachers and students and I hate it because 1 they aren't meant to and 2 the sound as no one eats with their mouth open.

[@thegooddoctor4353]

My mother, who's also autistic and special needs, does this... thing when she's frustrated or something's bothering her. I don't know if it's a stim or something else. Either with her knuckles or like with a coffee cup or something, she'll knock on things in a similar way to knocking on the door, but on the table, doorways, counter tops. And I want to curl into a ball like those little grey bugs you find under rocks, and scream. I don't, bc she's not doing it to intentionally get at me, but it's like being pelted with rocks. Fight or flight kicks in and I go hide in my room and pop the earbuds in.

[@pikmin4743]

bass from a car or nearby house, chairs squealing and creaking, dishes clanking, doors slamming, chewing, breathing, coughing, crowded rooms, hammering, drilling, engines, phone noises, typing and other clicking, etc sets my spideysense off and make me hulkout at the same time. like immediately I want to smash whatever made that sound. yet I can make the same sounds and often not be bothered. the sound of someone's voice if they have laryngitis or a croaky voice make my eyes water and I have to get away. deep breaths, ear plugs and noise canceling headphones and loud music are my flimsy shields

[@eliannafreely5725]

"How you experience misophonia may shape how you live your life" Me observing my life long choice to not have children because the cry of a baby is completely unbearable: "Nah, hasn't really affected things too much/s."

[@RyanScheie-ep9rv]

Does double hearing protection, along with a strong support network during infancy seem like a possible pathway to making it manageable?

[@zoeolsson5683]

@@RyanScheie-ep9rv no it doesn't.... Babies communicate by crying and how a care giver responds to that communication forms a basis to that child's emotional and social development. Elianna, babies crying is unbearable ... I think their cries designed that way ... To get us to pay attention to their needs. Children are barbaric little dictators ...(Mind you they are also so damn wonderful) Mum truth = two or more equal contradictory things being true at the same time. No shade on your choice. If you are ND being a parent is hardcore .... Also if you are ND your kids may be ND.... So you might end up with little buddies who love playing board games you do too

[@eliannafreely5725]

@@RyanScheie-ep9rv I don't know - on one hand I have helped to raise an infant as a full time carer (my niece) so it is possible to do. Also, I didn't know for most of my life that I am autistic or misophonic, so I didn't know to try mitigation like hearing protection or protecting quiet time and performing self care. So maybe that could've changed things, I can't tell, not havingdone it. I would describe the sound of an infant as - soul rending. I think a strong support system would be mandatory, so you could have some refuge from the sounds sometimes. And for me, that would've meant more than just the other parent, since a support system only one person thick means you are one person away from being a single parent. Obviously, autists raise kids all the time. Personally I didn't want to risk it, since children aren't something you can undo if it isn't working, and I also have tactile sensitivities that make the idea of actually being pregnant abhorrent. I'm sorry to use such a strong word because people get very sensitive about babies and childbirth, but that's the right word. To me it would've been like a nightmare. To be clear, the pregnancy and infancy part. Not the having a family or bonding with kids part.

[@DWSP101]

There’s a lot of sounds that trigger me and a lot of other sounds. Don’t trigger me that trigger other people I like complete silence. The fact I like to talk.

[@ThompsonTurvy]

30:11 - Hilarious! ("Blame it on the cat.")

[@AtónwaOkwári963]

Styrofoam is torture(I probably shouldn't have said that)😊

[@beckymcmanus3367]

Whistleing makes me ready to do time 🤬🤬🤬🤬

[@resourcedragon]

*ME TOO!*

[@gaylynyoung6387]

🙋‍♀️ Glad I’m not alone.

[@debreaneibarger2558]

I have a sensitivity to loud sounds, but I will play music loudly. I think it doesn't bother me when I play my music loudly, because I'm in control. I know to anticipate the loudness, and I can adjust the volume. Being in control of my environment and schedule is key to keeping myself "balanced". I need to know what is going to happen next to avoid as much anxiety as possible.

[@samanthabright3390]

Oh, i absolutely feel disgusted when someone is chewing and breathing loudly next to me. It could be someone I love dearly, and it makes no difference 😂 you had me cracking up this episode.

[@ulkesh78]

Whistling has always made me tense up and become extremely irritable. I just need to stop that noise or get away from it.

[@resourcedragon]

*YES!*

[@TheKrispyfort]

We can never meet IRL. I am chronically sniffing due to a weird type of constant rhinorrhea. And, no, blowing my nose isn't going to help because it's CSF, not mucus I should just stay in my room 😅

[@LEO91968]

I have it. My Dad had it!!! I can't drive when my mother is in my vehicle because she purposefully tries to trigger me so she can take it as a personal affront and pick a fight with me because nothing she does could possibly be distracting me while I'm driving. And, who am I to ask her to stop? That might sound paranoid; but, you don't know my mother!!!❤ It can be very hard on relationships.

[@LEO91968]

Orion, you say that you need to allow them to know what you're going through. I always do. Some people really don't care.😢

[@BrittneyHillsbery]

@@LEO91968 It sounds like you might be in an abusive situation.

[@LEO91968]

@@BrittneyHillsbery I've recently gone mostly no contact with my mother. I'm pretty sure she's a narcissist. Gotta love youtube. I'm 56 now. If I'd figured it out when I was younger, I wouldn't have spent most of my life trying to prove I was worthy of love!!! My Dad and her are two sides of the same coin. When you grow up with it, that's all you know. Now I know, I can't unknow it, lol!!! Things will be okay eventually. I'm going to have to deal with a bunch of health issues before I can really make a new start; but, things are hopeful. Thank you for your comment.❤️

[@mkb7013]

People eating and swallowing, synthesized percussion sounds, tapping, and paper towels being rubbed together. I lose it.

[@Green_Roc]

I have literally passed out, unconscious and hospitalized, for 6 days, because of noise being made by neighbors.

[@Autism_Forever]

I develop seizures from exposure to any noise above 60 Db. 45 Db is the end of pain free range for me. city of alexandria virginia: raised decibel level in its regulations to 65 Db Me: started writing $1B class action lawsuit against city of alexandria virginia

[@resourcedragon]

Good luck with your lawsuit.

[@Green_Roc]

Unexpected sudden sounds trigger my autistic meltdowns, including but not limited to dog barks, door knocks, and phone rings. I've frequently failed to explain this problem to people. I can show them this video... they need to understand before I die from being triggered one-too-many times.

[@Green_Roc]

I am going to write your video URL down and give this to several people who continue to allow these painfully excruciating triggering sounds around me. Their sounds and my involuntary reflexes feel like I am slowly dying from every heart palpitating situation. Landlords, policy makers, and dog owners are slowly killing me with their ignorance. I need them to stop these noises, and they have the power to stop the noises, but they refuse to! Telling me to "modernize" as if that fixes everything -_-

[@Green_Roc]

24:04 Oh boy I have tried over half a dozen headsets trying to block out the sounds that trigger my autistic meltdowns. Air Pods Max too, and none of them have been able to block out the noise of the dog barking nearby. Also the active noise cancelling sets have this weird unpleasent pressure feeling that I dont like to feel, but I put up with it for up to 8 hours, yet it is not enough to block out all sounds. Add to all that, I cant stand to wear a headset more than 8 hours (gets incredibly painful for my head and neck having pain issues after wearing it for hours). I am completely unable to sleep an entire night with headsets on, as my body will eventually take anything off my head while I am unconscious/sleeping. Earbuds for me, are intolerable for even a moment! They all feel like someone has shoved a spiky ball into my ears, like cramming sandpaper or something, little spiky pain. and basic earplugs sound like a wind tunnel, forever noisy. Painful, stabbyness comes from anything touching my ears, like someone jabbed a thousand needles into my ear's skin. I struggle to sleep sometimes, because my ear hurts from the pressure of laying on a pillow. My pillow has a hole in it so nothing touching my ears. I need to live away from these triggering sounds, but after "Fair housing' in America allowed dogs to go EVERYWHERE, I am forever in audible torture in my own home until I find a housing unit where I cant hear outside noises. On a plus side, I am almost ready to move to another location, on a third floor and 'hopefully' no noisy dogs, only 'hopefully', because I having searched for months, cannot find an affordable/accessible place to live that is "No dogs" in San Diego California. People bring their dogs into Wal Mart and I have a meltdown because it barked... This is not a life I wish to live, shutting myself away from everyone because I cant stop the meltdowns once triggered, it's like trying to stop a sneeze. Gotta get away from the stuff that triggers, as so many of the controllers of the triggers just dont give a damn, and continue with the noises that are slowly killing me. "Slowly killing me" in a real literal sense. I could have died without hospital care when I had passed out in my apartment earlier this year. 6 days I was not aware of anything, doing nothing! No eating no drinking no pooping, just lying on my floor over a day before a friend called paramedics, suspected a stroke, observed me making word salad, and needed to be hospitalized to give me fluids so I wouldn't die from thirst. After I woke up in the hospital, a friend explained what they witnessed. Doctors could not find a specific cause or explanation why I had no consciousness for over 6 days. Another event where I had passed out for 3 days in June after having been to the (overwhelming) DMV to get my ID renewed (damned expiration dates, wth). For this second unconscious time, the hopital cat scan saw some black spots on my brain. These hospitalizations, two so far this year, terrifying to know these have happened to me, without clear explanations as to "why" and doctors havent figured out what is causing these blackouts. I am making my best guess these lost time episodes I've had are instigated by noise and overwhelm! Humanity generally tells me to just deal with it, learn to cope, accept it because that is how life is, and one of the noisemakers told me to "modernize" another person part of the landlord's employees says "It's an apartment" as if to normalize all these sounds that didnt exist a century ago. Poor useless advice! "Putting up with" is basically pretending I am not bothered, until my brain functionally shuts down. My brain shutting down after too much pounding from neighbors. Pounding! What are you doing mate? Dropping refrigerators? Egads. I seriously have more stuff to say about this very serious experience of having noises literally causing me to pass out. I've heard from a few other friends that some sounds made by humans have caused them to throw up and sometimes have to go to the medical hospital too. We need real serious consideration about the health hazards of these ongoing sounds that have the potential to kill and disable people. ----- Thank you Orion for making a video about something that has been going on around me that is potentially deadly if not stopped/mitigated.

[@Green_Roc]

"It's a dog, it barks" says my neighbor... does not dissolve how I feel.

[@kj3d812]

9:20 This is because misophonia triggers the *limbic system*, which only has two options: Run away from it, or kill it. The latter explains why we are filled with such rage when we cannot escape the sound, such as a noisy coworker we have no choice but to sit near (and asking HR to move does no good). Ask me how I know. Joey Lott has an excellent book on the subject. (The rest of his work is up for debate, but he nails the subject of misophonia.)

[@CalebTWilliams]

My misophonia is severe enough that my own chewing is a trigger half the time. I find that already being irritated (even just hangry) makes everything worse. Really sucks when I'm hangry, need to eat, and just can't eat because I can't stand my own chewing.

[@KypCaprice]

Ticking clocks… tick, tick, TICK!! Please excuse me while I locate and smash the source for that infuriating sound. 😖

[@terrinatufnail183]

Besides the ones you have mentioned, my biggest trigger is whistling, especially tuneless whistling; it's like fingernails on a chalkboard. I have a fight or flight response.

[@robertwilloughby8050]

Now, I don't have misophonia much, but I hate unexpected LACK of sound. Radio stations going off the air is very annoying to me.

[@Synical777]

Growing up, hearing people blow their nose made me feel like I was going to throw up.