Invisible Autistic Struggles

[@KnitWitch]

I love you 😂 Every time I listen to you, I remember how autistic I am. I forget how complicated my brain is until you remind me. I'm a real party!😂

[@MomontheSpectrum]

I saw a meme the other day that said "Sometimes I question whether or not I'm autistic, and then I leave my house." hah!! Glad you're here. Thanks for the comment.

[@AussieMDM]

Haha I remember writing in an email to my psych at the start of ths week during assessment 'Wow, if I'm not ASD, I'm a hot mess'

[@alisonwhite9588]

Same!! 😂 I so often forget that, while others around me don't have those 'quirky' thoughts/habits, there are so many other people on this wonderful planet who do, so I can share these with them/you (if I need to) instead of hiding them all the time ❤

[@paulveenvliet9130]

Taylor, I also love you. But I am a guy, so that sounds a bit cringe, so let me rephrase: where in the world can I find someone who would understand autism (and my autism and me) as much as you do? This video is again spot on. Thanks for making it. Never, ever think of editing out remarks like three hemispheres. I guess this is autistic humor, but you made me grin for hours.

[@samuelferrardz]

Oh wow I have exactly the same thing haha!

[@odetteuys1111]

When I was a banker, finding mistakes was my super power. I was really good at it. I never knew it offended everyone else outside of my workplace, until one day someone told me I was a smart alec. What? It really floored me. I was so used to doing my 'due diligence', thinking I was being a good and considerate human. But hell no, apparently that is severely frowned upon.

[@Mgt44411]

I resonate with that SO much!

[@creatuitiveguru]

I suspect I'm autistic, and I just find it so sad when people get treated this way. I have always been called a "smarty pants", or "know it all", since I can remember. It really bothers me that people don't care about accuracy. Because it drives me insane. I can't even misspell in a text. I just can't. It's not perfection, it's accuracy, there's a HUGE difference in my book. I am so not about perfection.

[@NeoGarax]

Bruh, I have the exact same feeling of being called a smart alec, why do you got to call me out like that?

[@orchardhillshomestead]

"I can't hear you; the lights are too bright." Literally just said this yesterday at work. HUGE sensitivity for me. 100% get this!

[@1Hawkears1]

I accidentally call bright lights "loud" very often

[@NicholasVernem-GroovyNickyLee]

​@@1Hawkears1 they are! It's like they're silently screaming directly into my brain! It's like Professor X is yelling at you but he's Professor X so of course nobody else can hear it and you sound crazy when you bring it up. Lol

[@vocalsunleashed]

I always feel like neurotypical people have their sensory processing happen separately for every sense but mine is like all senses mix together so if the lights are too bright I can't possibly process what someone is saying. I _can_ hear them, but they might very well be speaking Chinese or another language I don't understand because I have no idea _what_ they're saying 😵‍💫

[@creatuitiveguru]

The bright lights thing is hard for me while driving. If it's in my face, like in the morning, it just makes me want to pull over. I can't, the world has a schedule. And if someone is trying to talk to me when that happens, I cannot process at ALL. I really have to sit up and make it a point to get hyper aware of everything around me on the road, and like if there's a stop sign I have to keep saying in my mind that I need to stop when I get there. And God forbid the sun is going in and out of the branches of trees along the road. I really do have to slow down, and people probably think I'm an idiot.

[@g.lynn.]

I LOVE when my husband goes away on work trips just for the fact that I am completely alone (when the kid is at school or asleep) and I feel so much more productive. Like just not having to exchange quick little stories about my day and how I’m doing, coupled with the freedom of not feeling judgement about how or when I get something done… it is liberating. And it’s really hard to communicate it to him in a non-offensive way lol

[@heatherwilliams3748]

I feel this. I'm married with two toddlers, I work from home but my toddlers are also home with me so alone time is hard to come by. My husband isn't the type to need alone time so it can be difficult for him to understand why I'd want/need it. Sometimes it can even be perceived as rejection to him. Anyways, I get it.

[@markjurries3511]

The last one hit hard for me. My dad always was correcting my mom when she told a story, and yes usually about unimportant details. We thought he was being mean to her. Coming to understand I'm autistic has meant refiltering my life, which has led me to understand my dad was most likely autistic too. Giving myself grace also means giving him grace, which goes against my lifelong narrative about him. That has been so hard. Oh, and i interrupt too😅.

[@MomontheSpectrum]

It’s nice to hear you’re able to reframe something like this with more knowledge about your and possibly your family’s patterns!

[@_arts_y]

💯to all of these. I can’t even pick a favorite because they’re all so accurate for me. I can’t explain it but I need to keep my friend groups compartmentalized. It’s like I have to have different groups that demand a different energy from me separated. I cannot handle them meeting or my brain fries. I also cannot handle having people stay over at my place. I feel like I need to monitor their happiness or something. Anyways, so many great points!!

[@MomontheSpectrum]

Yay glad you were able to resonate! Thanks for your comment. 😁 glad you’re here

[@magrietb]

MONITOR THEIR HAPPINESS

[@StormCrowe73]

To leave a conversation - "DId you know that autistic people end conversations awkwardly?" Then start slowly stepping backwards.

[@clmoryel]

😂😂😂

[@gracefulkimberella]

If anyone else is in my house, there's a part of my brain that I can't access: for me it feels like a chunk of my brain gets turned off then the 'out of sight out of mind' thing happens with that shut door area and I end up finding it again just as soon as the person or people leave! But in that same moment I realized that keeping that door closed was also draining my energy and suddenly I'm completely drained

[@rmrmlcy8906]

a billion YESSSES!!!! and its emotionally painful because im subconsciously afraid i’ll NEVER GET BACK to the thoughts i was having before the distracting presence came along. and that Me and the goals that Me had will forever be lost.

[@rmrmlcy8906]

someone being around is like a grenade that could go off at any second without warning and RUIN EVERYTHING so how could it ever not feel like a pebble in one’s shoe, metaphorically. small but impossible to tune out (because i cannot tune things out - studies back this up, some people just CANT “get used to things”, we cannot and do not eventually acclimate. every raindrop is another novel assault, anew. a whole new affront. the surprise never wears off.) someone being around makes the vibes off, they make the situation a powderkeg pregnant with potential for horribleness. it’s impossible to stay ME with that looming. i cant exhale, i cant remember what i need to do, i cant function. i thought i was literally getting dementia because my brain fog was getting sooooooo bad over the last year. it finally dawned on me that i was not ever getting any alone time, what with schedule changes and life demands. once i started getting some Me time it was amazing how clearheaded and on top of things i was able to go back to being.

[@gracefulkimberella]

@rmrmlcy8906 I have the same experience with roommates. I'm not sure what I'll do if I ever get put in a nursing home 😳😳😳

[@Etci21]

for me, even my cat turns that part of my brain off, because I know I have to take care of her and I'm never really free to do what I want. yeah. I love her and she's my life, so I won't be able to live without her anymore. 2 sides of hell :(

[@gracefulkimberella]

@Etci21 I'm AuDHD, I have lived with all kinds of dichotomies my entire life. Also, in case you have a meltdown, your poor little can live off of dry food and toilet water. Js, you know, in case you need help with an excuse to take the deep jump into the void we call meltdown.

[@maryannestahl5683]

i recognize the hypervigilance you describe regarding responsibility for the care of others. To me, it’s tied into anxiety . Responsibility of ANY kind is a burden. But if it involves living beings? Immensely exhausting , even if deeply satisfying.

[@iankretschmer559]

Same for me. I can be completely myself and productive if surrounded by strangers I can ignore. Put in someone I care for and it's gone. Also, it is hard to judge in which situations I am allowed to ignore people I now like coworkers etc.

[@sophh3689]

Couldn't have put it better myself. I never understood how for other people the joy they derive from looking after others seems to cancel out/override the anxiety. For me, no matter how rewarding the experience, my brain's gonna systematically build an inventory of EVERY SINGLE THING that could go wrong and repeat it back to me on a loop.

[@linneakortfalt5094]

Thank you for explaining the ”being in charge of another person” and the hyper focus we need on that ALL the time! The stress of being a single mom when school is not working either is extreme! My friends always tell me to relax about it, but it’s crazy how I put my children’s wellbeing ahead of my own.

[@mm-slithytoves]

I'm more sensitive to noise than to light but it still leads me to an "I can't hear you, the lights are too bright" sort of thing. A while back a friend mentioned that she'd noticed that when we were in a noisy bar or restaurant together I would close my eyes when I was talking. With all the noise going on I needed to shut out as much sensory input as possible to be able to concentrate enough to put a sentence together. (This friend is also autistic, and that observation was part of a long process leading up to my own diagnosis a couple months ago.)

[@daniannie]

I do the same with escalators. And pretty much everything else mentioned! Not correcting incorrect information in conversations is SO hard!!!

[@MomontheSpectrum]

so glad i'm not alone 😅

[@TheXynariz]

I feel SO DUMB about the escalator thing! I'd rather walk a fair way further to take an elevator! But then I worry what others would think, especially if I'm in a group, etc.

[@starflower703]

The XyNariz I have chronic pain so I just tell my friends I will meet them downstairs at a certain place. 99% of the time they follow me to the elevator.

[@daniannie]

@@TheXynariz those who travel with me often know I’m probably taking the stairs, if I have an option. I have gotten better about it over the years, but I still hesitate and watch at least 3 steps go by before hopping on 🤪

[@sloppyset5]

@@daniannie traffic circles for me. We just moved to a town that has lots of traffic circles and they truly scare me. Too many cars coming at me from different directions and trying to figure out when it's my turn makes me want to cry. It reminds me of jumping rope when I was young when two people turn the rope and the jumps in only much more dangerous.

[@tabithabasye2440]

My wife just told me she thinks others might think I am a know it all because I correct misinformation. To me it is a form of lying. To hear something incorrect and to agree (or agree with silence) is equivalent to me lying. I don’t want to lie therefore others must have their information correct or I will correct them. Nothing personal, I make mistakes too. In fact that is another reason I dislike misinformation. If I take in bad information I am likely to repeat it & I DO NOT LIKE BEING WRONG!

[@naomikenzia-davis4148]

Exactly!

[@Hiyall985]

I am like this as well, although I don't see it as a lying issue (though I can see that perspective, too). Being the type of person that will go "live in my head" while I research something I am curious about and try to learn as much as I can, I always assumed other people would want to know if they were uninformed or misinformed also. My dad calls it "inquisitiveness" and my mother called it "smart @ss know it all" lol. If I am flat out wrong about something, I actually prefer to be told and will go study and inform myself so I don't perpetuate it. Took me a long time to understand some people truly don't appreciate that and I still slip up sometimes all these years later.

[@chesneymigl4538]

This is why I find "normal" to be inherently dishonest. They don't speak logic they speak in emotions. But emotions don't care about facts. People are more easily manipulated when being led by their emotions, and yet they say we are cold and apathetic.

[@elsabeaulieu]

Don't you worry about your stories not being interesting. Your stories are *awesome*. I can't get enough of them.

[@MomontheSpectrum]

🥹🥹🥹 this honestly means a lot to me!!

[@dogcarman]

I agree. Every story you tell holds up a mirror to my life. Sometimes it doesn’t quite match my experience, but it always makes me think, and that is a precious quality.

[@Mgt44411]

I totally agree!

[@funniful]

Totally me. My brain gets stuck on SOmEthing…either an unusual word they used, or saying (or using) a word incorrectly, or the fact that they’ve said “actually “ fourteen times in the last 60 seconds, or a weird crinkle line in their forehead…. Doesn’t matter. I get fixated on it and I lose the conversation. Gahhhh! Or! I have a question about something they just said, and UNTIL I can ask my question, nothing else they are saying is going to get through to my brain.

[@buntzy2]

YASSSS! Totally me, too! Every word matters TOO MUCH! 😢

[@AnniceAnneFiberArts]

@@funniful Absolutely true for me too. 😊

[@elizabethivy1337]

Yes! The thing about questions is so true for me as well. If I focus back on the conversation, there is a very high chance that I will totally forget my question and it will not come back. Super frustrating experience.

[@Mgt44411]

​@elizabethivy1337 totally get that!

[@CardinalTreehouse]

Good job speaking up for yourself on the hernia! It's so hard for us to do that, ESPECIALLY when it's speaking with someone who studied these things, but we know our bodies the best. When I was a baby, I hurt my leg pretty badly. My mom took me to the hospital and was wanting to get it xrayed but the doctors just thought it was a sprain. My mom said "I'm not leaving until you xray it" so they said fine and got me xrayed a bit later. When the xray came back, my mom said she was holding me in a rocking chair and could see the doctors when they read the xray - they looked at it, talked to each other, then turned to look at her out in the waiting room and she just stared back at them haha

[@buntzy2]

Maybe you didn't seem to be in enough pain to warrant considering a break. We tend to feel our bodies differently.....

[@CardinalTreehouse]

@buntzy2 Normally I would agree, but I was crying and was a baby so I don't think I would have been masking

[@TarotbyCassy666]

Omg. This is all me. I feel so much of this. And sometimes my socks feel too loud, so I understand the fluorescent lighting stopping you from processing what someone is saying.

[@MomontheSpectrum]

I totally get "my socks feel too loud." Well said

[@gracefulkimberella]

@@TarotbyCassy666 the buzzing from the old florescent lights is the worst!!! Equal with the scratching of the chalk board!!! Think 'beep of the battery dead smoke detector" meets 'shrill of a toddler in Walmart'. I'm nauseous just thinking about it!!! 🤢

[@gracefulkimberella]

@@MomontheSpectrum ditto

[@starflower703]

I just replaced light fixtures in my house that I bought in June. Some were not symmetrical, one was fluorescent, and several made noises. All the new lights are LED so we can adjust the color and the brightness!

[@MelanieButera]

I just bought colored lights that connect to my Alexa so I can control the color during the day and brightness. Really helps with my wake ups and sleeps too (increasing blue light brightness in morning, decreasing red light brightness at night).

[@idontwannapickanametho]

2:49 yes, very much!! It's a big part if why i struggle living with other people

[@thistlemoontarot5292]

Yup. I need the house to myself to clean or do work. It drives me nuts, not because I want to get on with stuff, but don't get much time on my own.

[@riverjao]

I’m 39 (I’ll be 40 in Feb. ‘25) and was assessed by a therapist (with a masters degree, specializes in autism) in October. She said that I was the poster child for ASD Level 1. Well, what she actually said was, “You check every box in every category!” And I saw a psychologist this month (Jan 2025) and he told me during the initial assessment that I didn’t even need to come back for actually testing because “it’s pretty clear that you have what they used to call Asperger’s.” And earlier this week my wife told a co-worker that I was diagnosed ASD Level 1 and her response was, “No?!?Ya think?!?” Glad to be here 👍 A/w, alexithymia is one of the parts I really don’t like. I just don’t enjoy having to feel something for a few days before I even realize what it is that I’m feeling. And small talk is more painful than getting shot in the kneecap with a staple gun. Switching attention: slightly less painful than giving birth (I’m given to understand). People eating around me is like slow death but worse. Can’t handle multiple questions/pieces of information? Bet that. Stuck on metaphors? My whole life. Always made sitcoms difficult. Great video!

[@JoshyCC]

Okay the mixing worlds part. I was listening and thinking yeah I have a hard time going with a work friend to do anything outside of work, like going out to lunch together. And then... you said... "Different friend groups merging." Just thinking of that possibility hit me like someone suggested that alternate universes really exist and people can willingly merge THOSE. So emotionally and socially scary.

[@elizabethivy1337]

Yes! I mask differently depending upon who I'm around. So, when two familiar groups merge unexpectedly, it's like my brain has too many mask options and doesn't know which one to choose, so I just end up freezing.

[@OjaiGirl777]

God bless you dear sweet Taylor.... I relate to everything you talk about. Thank you!

[@2323catlady]

Yes, Yes, Yes to everything you shared! I had to take my cat to the Vet today. Afer waiting for an hour in an exam room with paper thin walls, the vet tech came in moving fast and talking fast as voices from all the other rooms seeped through the walls. Plus she was talking LOUD. I finally asked her to speak more softly to which she bristled defensively explaining that many of her clients are hard of hearing. I had to stop her repeatedly so I can process what she was saying. When she left the room with the cat (to go weight him) I almost burst into tears. I was so exhausted by the time I arrived home, I had to spend several hours decompressing. That vet visit basically cost me an entire work day.

[@DenGirl12]

I’m a 46 yo wife and mom to one with adhd and possible autism. I was diagnosed with ADHD at 11yo and diagnosed as autistic level 2 at 44. I cannot, for the life of me, find much info level 2. I’ve masked my entire life and have barely gotten by (I’ve lived on my own before my husband for years. We married when I was 30. By husband has been very understanding in the past ten years of our 15 year marriage but I can tell he’s at his wits end. I can’t seem to get myself out of bed on my own or cleaning the house on my own or planning my days on my own. I feel like I need someone by my side to do anything and I hate it so much. I NEED help and I cannot find it.

[@jessicacorrine2085]

💜✨🌻 sending Love, Girl!

[@kala5810]

😢

[@starflower703]

Is it lack of motivation or overwhelming feelings that hold you back? I get easily overwhelmed and have found if I write down my list of goals and tasks then I can divide things up into small manageable tasks. Then I can mark it off the list when I’m done with each task. It makes me feel more productive when I can see on paper what I accomplished. I have chronic fatigue and pain, so I require frequent breaks and rest time, but if I set a timer, I can get up and go back to my tasks.

[@hollyw9566]

It drives me nuts when somebody asks me, "What's wrong?" I mean, it's obvious to them there's something wrong. But I know that I'm feeling something, but I don't know how to say what's wrong, I can't define it. Which is weird, kinda, for me, because I'm good with words, generally, unless I'm upset or rattled. Then they're just gone, like a flight of swallows that spots a cat.

[@rmrmlcy8906]

the only thing im ever able to come up with for an answer is everyone keeps asking me whats wrong! thats whats wrong. i was minding my business just being neutral and people started asking me Whats Wrong? over n over. it isn’t probably accurate but its the only information i know. if theres more data out there im not aware of it. but being put on the spot with invasive questions is definitely identifiable to me as something wrong and upsetting.

[@julialaynemcclain1562]

Silver bullet phrase: why do you ask? Practice I was taught for learning to say no to people applied to this one. You can practice saying this out loud w a willing partner, (contact me if you don’t have anyone to try it with- I’ll step thru w you) to them asking a series of such questions in varying degrees of coercive, directive or congenial tones. After about 30 practice rounds it should be accessible to grab for under pressure at least sometimes. Linguistic practuce doesnt work for everyone but I think it’s worth a try so I wanted to bring it up.

[@evettemariejeanne4483]

I was literally just talking with my (also autistic) cousin about this last one a few days ago. I've had so many negative experiences around this and it was good to know I'm not alone.

[@nadinemagana730]

I can definitely relate to having a sense of justice

[@ComplicatedSimplicite]

I feel so validated with all this. The kid part is CRAZY!! I was explaining this to my husband the other day. Just being responsible for them 24 hours a day / 7 days a week is so overwhelming. I just feel like I have to be on. I can’t fully relax.

[@jeaninevanzantvoort4042]

I haven't even seen this video entirely but i,m constantly nodding yes to everything. Especially on the 'how to communicate' this to a doctor or specialist. My body gets stuck and painfull and eventhought the fysio didn't find anything, i got send to a holistic fysio who does a bit more with mind and body and guess what. My body shuts down and gets stuck by stress or overloads. It took me more then 6 months for me to finally be able to say: Yes when i,m stressed my body gets stuck.

[@HappyJoyJoy2202]

Yes to the escalators ever since I can remember. I tense up trying to step on them with starts, and stops and then nope.

[@rmrmlcy8906]

i taught myself years ago the only way i can handle them is to say Okay, you are going to CHOOSE the next one and COMMIT and just cannot back out no matter what, okay here goes, here it comes, the NEXT ONE is THE ONE!! and i have to obey the rule ive made and get on that one. it’s never easy but it makes it possible.

[@theresjer]

1:30 I've experienced this less like the escalator, more like hopping into a set of spinning double dutch ropes😬

[@theresjer]

20:05 - "WELL, ACTUALLY.." - I'm totally that guy

[@RickyMaveety]

As am I!

[@LoveAllAnimalsAndTakeCareOf]

I can’t even watch it till the end of the video- just at 3:54 I can’t hold back tears. How could I have managed, to look „normal“ to anybody else, but inside I try to manage the chaos from all this „attacking“ me. Generally speaking I think, my english is quite good. But now I have a lack of words. I never dare to comment but in most of your videos I recognize myself. Now still the same. Can’t cook, when somebody is in the kitchen, stuck in the process, can’t think about what to do even at a „standard“ recipe😢 Try to learn an Instrument, but never could practice, because most time somebody is in the house and I feel ashamed - Now I feel like I should delete this comment because it’s way to long but a lot more to say and the description is absolutely inaccurate😢

[@MomontheSpectrum]

I’m so glad you left the comment here! And your English is wonderful.

[@victoriadrummond2506]

I feel exactly the same way. Thank you for bringing up cooking and practicing anything if another person is in the house

[@buntzy2]

I've always been super self-conscious, myself. Some things don't phase me because I grew up with a lot of siblings so I learned to be less self-conscious. But even having my husband walk in while I'm watching TV makes me feel super uncomfortable, like I'll be judged on my choice of movie/ show. My impulse is to turn it off or hand him the remote and be done. My sense of self is very weak around others.

[@LoveAllAnimalsAndTakeCareOf]

@ yes - exactly thats how it is to me. It‘s easyer now with KZbin: I just can take my mobil and go to another room… But if he asked (friendly, courious) to whom I am writing I‘m going to „defence mode“ ….

[@expensivecoffee]

Interesting how it's both so fun and fulfilling to hear all of these relatable struggles, and comforting in a "venting" kind of way too. Yet much like how you felt at the end of the video, it's overwhelming and frustrating and eepers too haha! Strange. With the eating in front of others, for me it's not just the sensory input from the food and socialising. But also following table etiquette, and my proprioception/kinesthesia... I so often spill food or drinks on myself, and goshhh if there's also people sitting beside you and if it's tight seating URK!!!

[@beckymiller1840]

I feel like you were picking around in my brain😂You have pretty much summed up my life in this video. I could not order plain coffee yesterday because the tiny recessed lights in the ceiling of the restaurant were too bright and loud and the waitress’ voice was piercing my ear and my shirt was touching me😅! Don’t even get me started on how hard it is talking to people that use the wrong word in a sentence that has absolutely no relation to the sentence it was used in. I get on my own nerves with this one. I love your channel ❤

[@creatuitiveguru]

OMG, the thing about not being about to say words, even though you hear it in your head. THIS IS MY LIFE. I have this elegant discourse in my head, but when I open my mouth to put it into sound, it's like a train wreck. I sound slow and stupid. I wasn't that way when I was younger, though. Maybe because I just blurted it out as a kid or young adult and didn't care so much how I came across?

[@parkerpk12]

Yes, Taylor! I am "David Rose shaking my head" at the last one. I've come to describe this to others as "my brain breaks". My brain will stop all thoughts and (sensory notice here!) it feels like hearing the needle of a record player screeching across a playing record. I can no longer continue and need to address it. 😂 Glad I'm not alone!

[@alisonwhite9588]

(I ugly-shiver felt that needle scratch!)

[@gracefulkimberella]

@@parkerpk12 I hear the record scratch too

[@julialaynemcclain1562]

Taylor,Hi! Watched this w my husband last night and even though he nodded off (we are old! And way too busy!) it was so great to have you articulating so clearly some of the dilemmas that I try to explain but semi fail. Every once in awhile you’ll say something that is like another piece of my own puzzle- escalators. No one I ever went shopping w could figure out why I would take so long to get on one and make such a big deal about it but it was hard to coordinate the stair movement with my movement with where you are supposed to step, w masking that I know what I am doing. It’s a miracle I ever learned to get on a chair lift-I just rush out the second the other chair goes so I’m definitely going to get swept into the chair no matter what. Getting dressed dilemma has a few more factors for me along w all the ones you mentioned that I wanted to list and see if others have more to check off. I need to consider layers, hats, terrain (mtns. dirt driveways. Or warmer/cooler item in bag for quick change because I get catastrophically hot or cold sometimes, color because I “feel” the color, and then the social aspect- what is my camaflouge, what role/aspect of my mask can I accomplish, what outfit is joyful, what costume am I in to give me the association w performing the activity - apron for cooking, hiking outfit, projects outfit. When I was working from home I would still dress bus casual to keep myself in the channel of that identity/focus. How to blend in to the context and fly under the radar but still feel authentic - not too flashy but feels self expressive, not too sexy or too business or too formal or too informal or too rock n roll or too impractical or too attention getting (after fronting a band for years where that was the point so it can get to be a habit or a norm) or too granny or too different from others. And then also whether where I am going is likely to taint the clothes with textile or other fragrance or other odors such that they will need to be aired out and washed separately (olfactory senses are disabling sensitive) so I wear business or yard work clothes to Dr/bodywork/stores that otherwise I won’t need. I love love love this community and it is fun to know that a few others probably enjoy reading all the comments as much as I do. Thx for always terrific content!

[@Mgt44411]

I love this community So much, too!

[@AussieMDM]

Uh...it's uncanny how you say exactly what I feel/experience. Diagnosed yesterday ASD L1 at 49yrs 8mths

[@MomontheSpectrum]

wow thanks for sharing! i know a diagnosis can bring up a lot of emotions. for me there was so much relief but also heartache and grief. Glad you're here and I hope you find a lot of support within this beautiful community

[@AussieMDM]

@@MomontheSpectrum Yes, mainly I just keep having Aha moments when I reflect on my past (even down to how little water I drink?!?!) and observe things I'm currently experiencing - the light bulb just keeps going off 😅 I reaaaaaaaaally appreciate your input, I keep watching your videos amd am reassured or learning things about myself through them...which is then reassuring, so thanks. And the autistic community online is just the best, so kind. The assessment is intense because you're so focused on the deficits which can be demoralising but the fact it's how I'm wired - not a flaw - is life changing.

[@SharrellKline]

OMG yes getting into a conversation when you enter an event! It's exactly like trying to time an escalator or double Dutch jump rope! When I used to have to go to professional events it was a nightmare! And recently I discovered that in my retirement community it's not any easier! I tried for 4 months last year, and it wiped me out so much I was in burnout for about 8 months. I decided in 2025 there will be no more social events, dinners, etc. with large groups. And you know what? I'm so OK and at peace with that decision. And my husband is fully on board and understands because he saw how hard I tried for 4 straight months and how failing at it -- I didn't make a single friend -- just did me in.

[@LunaticAstrology]

Omg. I responded to this and was going to say double dutch too!

[@LunaticAstrology]

School field trips were excruciating for me

[@LunaticAstrology]

Cannot follow verbal instructions Omg. The last one !!!!!!!! 100 percent

[@julialaynemcclain1562]

Double Dutch like the jump rope game? Yeah, no. I always wanted to but I would blow it immediately and no one wanted me on their team. (We played in teams)

[@julialaynemcclain1562]

I know- those people who can navigate wo writing every turn down - whoa! And maps- anyone ends have trouble reading maps? I think it has to do w “holding information in abeyance” which is an exec function thing.

[@Bedonkabonk]

19:44 I say "gif" as in "gift" because of what the "g" stands for. I wouldn't call the thing a "giraffe-ic interchange format." But that's just me. I'm not bothered when I hear it the other way because I know it's an alternative. Like, you can explain it as being the same as "GI" when that means "soldier." The "G" in that case means "government."

[@WiseOstrich-AwkwardHuman]

I use that same logic! The ‘g’ stands for graphic, which is pronounced with a hard g. Jif is peanut butter! 😂

[@travesiasideral]

Very relatable! Perhaps in the being responsible for others item, I would personally add difficulties on use of instant messaging apps, and keeping in touch in general, maybe cause of experiencing frequent daily life overloads and shutdowns 😕

[@elizabethivy1337]

I relate to everything you brought up in this video! I also struggle to access part of my brain when there is someone else in a space with me. I think it has to do with masking and social cues. Even if I'm not actively interacting with that person, the knowledge that they are nearby takes up a lot of processing power for me. I start thinking about what I'm doing and how it might be perceived if they were watching me, what non-verbal cues they might be giving, and whether or not there are unspoken expectations that I am 'supposed' to respond to in some way. It's exhausting! All of this subconscious worrying when I am around people is something that has really become a stronger focus to me this year. I think part of it has to do with past trauma and being misunderstood. I'm trying to work on accepting that I'm not actually obligated to mask to help strangers feel more comfortable while we're existing in the same space. Yes, that means that they might misunderstand me or have a negative reaction, but it's not my responsibility to correct that (responsibility is rarely assumed by NT people to make me more comfortable with their behavior, after all). I need to prioritize my needs and feelings, rather than exhausting myself worrying about everyone else in relation to myself. It's really hard to do, though.

[@Mgt44411]

I totally resonate with this!

[@Mgt44411]

Being misunderstood! I resonate with that so much!

[@RatsWhiskers]

I identified with so many of these! Thank you for your videos! I’m so thankful I found you. And I love my Ono roller too! ❤

[@MomontheSpectrum]

You are so welcome! And I’m so glad you love the roller too. Glad you’re here.

[@prettylittlechickadees7060]

@ 1:43 conversation struggles for sure! this is so true... by the time I think I can finally interject, everyone else has moved on.

[@greyfluffs]

On being responsible for other people, this really got me. I don't have little humans in my life, but the amount of discomfort (and even panic) I feel when it falls on me to wake someone up for the day? It's unreal.

[@fiftyplusplans]

I've gotten to where I record all conversations so I can go back and write and make sure I got it all or write down things I need to remember. Doctor's offices are the WORSE. They don't give you any useful information on their visit notes and if I don't record I might as well have not gone to the doctor to begin with!

[@michelleglidingswan4334]

Simply amazing - it all fits. I've spent an inordinately ridiculous amount of time trying to figure out idioms. Less now than when I was younger. My mind feels like a pretzel at times.

[@Sunila_DragonladyCH]

Re clothes. I always wear the same combo, jeans, a long-sleeved shirt and either a t-shirt or a collar-shirt over that, I play with colours to insert a bit of change. Cotton if at all possible. And at home I have my soft hoodie that I also wear whenever I am here.

[@janecme]

Totally relateable over conversations cues. I attended an autism talk and there was a chance to meet the speaker after. I stood at an appropriate distance from the speaker and another guest, giving them time to conclude their conversation. After five, six minutes I began to wonder if I had become invisible: it was like I was not there. I laughed at the irony of it, given that the speaker was an 'expert' but completely blanked me. But yes, you wait for a chance to join a group convo, but then the topic moves on and the opportunity has gone. Often I don't even bother to try anymore: if they want my opinion they can ask.

[@mm-slithytoves]

Wow, this video is the best description I've ever heard of what my life is like and how my brain interacts with the world, including some things I never connected with autism. (I was diagnosed just a couple months ago at the age of 47, so I'm still very much sorting these things out.) I was going to mention a couple things you talked about that I especially related to, but it turned out to be basically all of them!

[@robbiegibson4112]

I was a single father for 10 years. I was completely stressed out for 10 years and also experienced some of the best and most difficult times of my life. It goes by so quickly though. Soon enough...we have far too much time on our hands when they grow up. That part about being a single parent is very difficult too. I had empty nest syndrome believe it or not I got wilder than ever before trying to fill the empty space and time with the wrong things. I finally came to my senses again lol. I had no idea that would happen until it did.

[@gopinathmali7969]

Manifestation advice online is mostly recycled nonsense, and I was stuck believing it for years. Nothing worked for me until I read Vibrations of Manifestation by Alex Lane. Chapter 3 was like a slap in the face-it showed me why everything I’d been doing was pointless without fixing my energy first. Most people won’t tell you this because it’s uncomfortable.

[@naomikenzia-davis4148]

I kinda like idioms. The first time I hear it, it makes no sense, but then I like to dissect the phrase to see where it comes from and why it means what it means. Then I can use it too. Of course, I can't use it myself even if I know what is meant until I analyze it. Everything else, though? Yeah. That's me. Especially the correcting factually incorrect information. Oh, and needing to give the entire context for any anecdotes I share.

[@MomontheSpectrum]

Yeah some idioms I find endearing/enlightening. When I’m by myself and can pick them apart and process. 😆

[@DarkStone1979]

Great video, and, as usual, I find some things resonate profoundly while others not at all. For instance, I've never struggled with any of the stuff related to language. Now, this is largely due to the fact that American English has been a special interest subject for me for, literally, as long as I can remember. Consequently, things like idioms and their origins rather fascinate me instead of confuse or frustrate me. The good news is that, at least in my experience, it's not really an autistic thing to be tripped up by idioms, turns of phrase, metaphors, etc., but rather very much a human thing. People, especially those born after 1980, just struggle with this stuff. And pronounce the T in "often". And add an extra I when pronouncing "particularly". I digress. Okay, advice with describing your emotions. This, like other issues you've mentioned, is likely due to trauma. Autistic individuals are likely to manifest sensitivity issues early in life that their parents can't understand or respond to compassionately. The example I like use is a baby going into water that isn't hot to Mom or Dad, cries because it's hot, and then has their pain and fear invalidated when Mom or Dad says, "Ohhh, hush, you're fine." Because our parents are, ostensibly, gods, when we're children, we have no choice but to learn through repetition in a variety of circumstances that our experience is wrong and in order to get God's love, we must suppress our emotions and get our needs met by subtle, often unconscious, manipulation. This is, in essence, the breeding ground for anxious attachment. So, why can't you describe your emotions? Why don't you know what you need or want? Because you have next to no experience doing it. And therein lies the solution. You just train yourself to be emotionally literate. Google "emotions wheel" and just find one you like in the image results. Twice a day for thirty days, pick an event from the day and write down three feelings it made you feel. Then take those broad, generalized emotions (happy, sad, angry, anxious, excited, etc.) and drill down into three more specific emotions related to them. On your internal editor while storytelling: ask yourself WHY the context is relevant before sharing it. If you can't easily describe its explicit purpose to yourself, omit the context. My daughter struggles mightily with this and will include details that are entirely unnecessary. No one needs to know where you were going in a car full of friends if the story is about one of them having stinky feet. And when 70% of the story is composed of this totally irrelevant context, it becomes exhausting to listen to.

[@MomontheSpectrum]

Thanks for this!

[@kala5810]

Could you explore more about the inability to access the part of the brain, or what i relate to as being constantly emotionally hyperaware of the person in my presence ( especially my child who im responsible for and who seems to be neurodivergent also) which shuts off the other capacities. Im so so glad you brought it up Taylor

[@beautyactivist]

@kala5810 i experience this too. My new favorite theory of autism is monotropism which says our brains and nervous systems go in one direction and go hard. Explains a lot, and to me explains this difficulty with splitting attention. KZbin channel "I'm autistic now what" has a great video on monotropism.

[@LionsMainMessages]

Yes to so many! I’m going to ask my husband to watch because you put so well what I’ve been trying to explain for so long! TYFS❤

[@victoriadrummond2506]

Thank you for putting a lifetime of inexplicable experiences into words that make sense!! So validating! Can't thank you enough!

[@ags3006]

Not correcting something factually wrong is so hard for me and has given me so much frustration at work. A colleague got to the point of saying to me "every time I say X please understand that what I mean is Y". But I can never do it, I know that X is wrong even if everyone else understands Y 😢

[@WiseOstrich-AwkwardHuman]

So relatable, plus so many of the comments. I think I could write an essay based on responding to your astute observations here in this video. But, I’ll try to limit myself here. >Never thought of ‘unable to access’ brain areas or functions when other people are around, but this is such a hindrance in my life! >Truth/facts matter, so that last point resonates so strongly! >And the conversations bit - I thought more of playground jump rope than escalator. You know, two people swinging one rope for others to jump in. Like the escalator, people around you having no problem entering smoothly, I’m standing there, hands in front of me moving up and down as I try to catch the rhythm and find an opening… Then, if I somehow get into the rope, I don’t know how to get out (exiting the conversation) even though my presence is no longer adding anything (plus what I shared was ill-timed and awkward anyway). Meanwhile, other people continue to jump in and stay for precisely how long they want to, and exit smoothly. To finish the comparison, it’s pretty much only when the rope hits my legs or head and comes to a complete stop that I can get away, feeling embarrassed about my ‘performance’ and thinking I likely ruined the experience for every person in proximity. Oh, and note I mentioned a single rope…double dutch is way too advanced for me to approach.

[@courtneyharper]

Ahhh how to communicate so it's received! Yes! I'm prematurely shut down so often because of how I say things, I think... But I'm so often right in the end! I love these videos, Taylor. Thank you so much for them.

[@gracefulkimberella]

Being hyper invested in caring for others allows us to be extremely atuned (word? Spelling?) to the experience of being responsible for someone (others) that it is all consuming. Which makes us perfect for the job but uses all of our strengths simultaneously leaving us completely drained afterward. See!? I can be concise too 😅😅😅

[@elvwood]

Yep, most of this applies to me, and some of what doesn't I would put down to differing societal expectations for men and women. Thanks

[@CreativeAutistic]

I'm sorry to hear of your medical gaslighting, Taylor. I've had a very similar experience with my gallbladder and I'm (finally) having an op next month 🧡

[@not.bjcary]

MY GOODNESS. I was gonna comment on my shared experience with some of these. But SO MANY relatable things!! One thing I'll share related to "thinking small" since that's where the video is as I type this. It's been really hard to start over, creatively, after my burnout. Because it's hard for me to start anything new without feeling a very strong sense of where it could go. So, I don't even start because all I can think about is what will happen if this new venture actually succeeds and now I have this big thing I'm responsible for keeping up with...and I don't have the energy for that right now :-P

[@clmoryel]

OMG, so much this! This has been a huge struggle for me the past couple of years.

[@TheWilliamHoganExperience]

Autism researcher Barron Cohen said that autism is the “extreme male brain”. He was rightly criticized for that characterization, but I’m starting to think he was onto something: Take gender out of the theory and you get something like “Autism is the extreme human brain” Seen through that lens, the seeming contradictions and overlap surrounding ordinary human behavior and experiences and autistic behavior and experiences make perfect sense. Yes, “everyone stims” Stimming is a common human behavior. But autistic stimming is extreme, as are so many other things in our world. Perhaps because we are extremely human ❤

[@grindsession24]

- Being responsible for other people - I can't even start to think about what I might want to eat until I'm done preparing my child's meal and confirmed that they are eating it.

[@evergreenforestwitch]

Oh yes, I do NOT like people in my house! Pets are fine, although why I don't know because my cat is a menace, but the nervous system is fine with his nonsense. People put me ~▪︎~on edge~•~ to the point where, depending on who it is - God forbid a repair person and a stranger- I am fully masked up. I think it's the mixing worlds thing a bit, really. And like the most vulnerable version of it. It's dysregulating to feel the need to mask when I'm in the place where I usually don't do it. I think. Idk really.

[@DonMarie-n3c]

Ha ha, yeah, escalators....I've learned to stop looking down and just step on. Your going through all the same things I do and I really understand your "Mixed worlds". You are so lucky to find all this out when younger. I just slowly found over the last few years what has been going on with me and I'm 64. It answers so many questions in my life but way to late. This leads to a unsatisfied life.

[@lenemogensen7168]

Your list of autistic challenges is spot on ! As a (very) late diagnosed autistic woman I realise that I have lived my whole life of 63 years without understanding why I would always end up being totally exhausted and wanting to run away. I could - and I would - do all the challenging stuff, but now I know that I had to put in way too much energy to push through ! I wonder if I’ll ever learn how to stop pushing through…

[@naktiluka]

I relate to most of these actually, except maybe sensory issues. Either they aren't that strong, or I'm just so used to them that they seem normal to me. The ones with "merging worlds" was a surprising revelation though. Not only I have troubles behaving differently in different companies, but I'm struggling when I want to introduce person from one company to another company. But I never thought much of that struggle lmao. MAYBE that derives from that other struggle about responsibilities: in this case I'm responsible of how those people feel about each other when they introduced, how they perceive each other, etc.

[@kathybramley5609]

I always overthink and get scared of escalators . But I over jump into conversations. Especially group brainstorming type conversations. Maybe the AuDHD. But it's like adjacent to scripting and the relief of performance because I feel a pressure to engage and be helpful.

[@vinny142]

Escalators: I have that sometimes, but I think that's also just a thing about escalators; you need to learn when to get on and off. I do have similar crap like when I clean my glasses I'm using a cloth and rubbing the lens and at a certain point my brain knows that it's time to stop, but when exactly? Is it on a down stroke or an up stroke? What if pulling the cloth off the lens to the right picks up some dirt and smears it all over the lens? I know it doesn't matter, I have the cloth right there, but for some reason my hands just keep cleaning and cleaning until my brain finally decides that this is utter madness and angrily makes me quit. Ofcourse then the lens still isn't as clean as I wanted so I go through the day with half-cleaned glasses, because I don't want to get stuck again.

[@markjurries3511]

Congratulations on persevering for the hernia diagnosis! Several years ago it took me 22 months and 12 different doctors to get a correct diagnosis. We all need to advocate for ourselves and our loved ones with the medical community.

[@MomontheSpectrum]

Wowwwwww!!! That’s a long time to persevere. 😓

[@DenGirl12]

I would LOVE to know more about level 2 autism.

[@MomontheSpectrum]

thanks for the suggestion! Currently planning out 2025 content

[@CardinalTreehouse]

​@MomontheSpectrum Have you done a community-sourced tips and tricks video (or community post)? People could suggest ways they have mitigated certain problems in their lives, such as replacing all your cutlery with bamboo or plastic if the scraping against dishes is a big trigger.

[@robbiegibson4112]

I am learning to manage my emotions, thoughts, actions, etc. more efficiently which is saving many spoons and trying to only hyperfocus on positive and educational thoughts as well as serious prayer every day. I am still signing back up. I am just paying off some crud quickly. I have a hard time getting everything done. Sorry about that. I hope everyone is doing well. Have an excellent night.

[@Mgt44411]

OMG! I resonate with Every Single word of this video! I've known for a very long time that I am autistic, but haven't been able to get an official diagnosis. One professional said " In no way are you autistic... you are an HSP (highly sensitive person)" I may be that also, but i know i am autistic! The sad thing is that without a diagnosis, I'm not eligible for services of any kind...heck i don't even know what services are available... Anyway, I am so grateful to you for sharing your story and the things you struggle with! SO grateful! It makes me know I'm not alone, and the tips you offer for making it an easier journey are so helpful! From the bottom of my heart, I thank you! ☀️💖☀️

[@LyndoCool]

in a social setting with conversations. I could be in a conversation with another person, then a 3rd person walks in and starts talking with person 2 and I get left out completely. I could be in a group of 4 or more people having a conversation, all the others get equal talk time but there is no pause in the group for me top say anything. So I feel like what was the point of me being here and casually walk away.

[@MomontheSpectrum]

YES! I know exactly what you’re talking about.

[@writingtools]

Totally relate to this. I recently had to support a friend through a pretty horrendous break up. Whilst they were in my house everything else stops. I was unable to do things which ended up causing me problems later as my brain was all taken up with looking after my friend. Just the way is.

[@tabithabasye2440]

A note on COMFRT… besides it’s misspelled! The return for store credit only is crap. I am Autistic, I don’t know if that is going to hurt me so there is no way I am going to buy a pricey sweatshirt without being able to return it. Just a note for you to give them. 💜

[@chrisjarkovsky1655]

I don't know if what I'm about to say is an autistic trait, but I always have second thoughts before I purchase anything. One thing I can think of is tiramisu. I like the Walmart brand of Tiramisu, and I walk by it and even hold it, and I rarely buy it. I never treat myself enough, I feel. Even like my hobbies such as playing the guitar, and treating myself to a new one. I almost feel like it's pulling teeth to convince myself that I can treat myself to things that I enjoy every once in a while.

[@saltypeanut__sunny]

Your videos really help me, to find inner peace 🥰It's massive how you can put things, that I also feel, into words. I feel, I'd never be able to do this, myself. Listening to you, is like I'm constantly nodding in my brain "Yeah, I know this - wow, this makes sense now - wow, it's really autism, I'm not dumb or lazy!" Thanks to you, I know that I know that I'm autistic and I don't care, what my assessment brings next month (I'm female, 41y old and highly masking). Because deep inside, I just know now and it puts finally a lot of weight off my shoulders. Oh and the mixing groups part now finally makes sense to me! I even cringe inside by the thought of mixing co-workers with my friends and never understood, why 🤯 My brain feels like a crashing computer, because I have my "work-personality" and my "friends-personality" and also my real self, when being alone with my husband. I just don't know how to behave, when groups are mixed and I feel like not having full control in which personality I slip. I really need to lern how unmask and will check out your website.

[@HLB512]

First 2 minutes… I cease to be able to think if there’s too many people around. It’s like freeze

[@suspicious-gnome]

Omg, yes & yes & YES!!!!!! I completely resonate with all these things, and I never even thought about most of them being an issue, or that they were anything that other people might feel... Your videos are incredibly eye-opening and validating 💚✨

[@sharonsteplermusic6575]

This is all so relatable, Taylor. I feel so validated listening to you. Thank you!!

[@IrenaRose44]

I relate to EVERYTHING you said. Super love this!

[@Bmaessg]

Pattern: I see a medical issue in myself on visit one, doctor doesn’t see it until visit two or three. Sort of a hyper internal awareness. Kidney stones, infections, you name it.

[@StarShade-l7q]

Loved it! I was a hard G .gif person most of my life. I dislike that they pronounce it .gif but peanut butter, but they did include the pronunciation in their initial publication of the file format. The hard G is incorrect in the same way that we don't pronounce NASA, SCUBA, or LASER. The creators did specify how they wanted it pronounced but it still eats at my skin to hear it with the j and not the gi sound lol.

[@SoOkThenLetsGo]

Seeing a friend out of context, like not at your local coffee shop where you always meet, escalators, being distracted when in hyper focus, not being able to do something I’ve done before, being somewhere without a car to “escape “ if I need to, and things like babysitting - being the responsible adult and worrying about any emergency (hyper helicopter mode). I’m buying the ono roller so thank you for the recommendation, and I’m getting a few fidget rings. Idioms big time like what do shirt sleeves have to do with me being here? “Here you are in shirt sleeves “ what does that even mean? For now on instead of from now on…. Love your videos

[@MomontheSpectrum]

💓

[@arlenesobhani8739]

Escalators! I thought I was just clumsy. The timing is so difficult for me. Also the thing about anyone else in the house: except for my daughter, who is wired similarly, if there are other people in the house it just feels chaotic to me. I don't feel secure. I don't really try to think.

[@arlenesobhani8739]

I was the youngest of 5 and I could never get into a conversation. It takes me forever to tell a story because I have to set it up. And many times I get the feeling that there are people that I have no credibility with. I will make a statement that I know is true, because I looked it up, and someone will say, "Do we know that such and such is true?" I'm a nurse and I gave a well-informed opinion about the type of dementia our dad had, and my sister goes, "How do you know?"

[@dahutba]

I'm sure at some point in the past I've made a comment appreciated one of your other vids, but this video realllly resonated with me. Usually in a video with a list of traits, I don't resonate with all of them, but I strongly resonated with all of these! I will be using this video as a resource for others to watch to understand me, thank you :)

[@Newfers77]

I'm laying in bed watching and when you got to the last one my entire body tensed up and now I need to relax. lol

[@beautyactivist]

I cant have pictures of my family visible or I cant relax/be myself. Only pics of plants, places, animals or cheerful strangers.

[@ELWest1000]

That last one, ahhhh yes! I AM the "Actually...." person 😂

[@MomontheSpectrum]

Haha yesss

[@davidhoff3829]

I'm new to this world and I don't have anything official, but this video is describing me. Thank you so much for helping to put this into words.

[@Mkognito]

yes, Yes, YES! All of that!!! (Well, except for the "responsible for others" part. I'm single with no kids, so that part's kind of hard to relate to. But the rest? Spot on!)

[@samisapeli8892]

I can relate to many of these, especially the first one. I imagine it's like having several channels of processing (sensory, social, to-do, interoception, etc) and they can't all be in use at the same time. If I dedicate (read: when I have to dedicate) one (or more!) to social interaction of any kind (even being alert in case of a social interaction), I can't benefit from the channels' synergy when it comes to me thinking about myself, or feeling myself within.

[@samisapeli8892]

The more I think of this, I'd say one channel goes to hearing (& watching!) other people, and another channel to monitor my face, mannerisms, etc. There's a lot going on!

[@TheXynariz]

The fact that I made a list of all 18 (main) points and scored myself against them probably is enough to "prove my autistic-ness". (Not that it needed proving. But the parentheticals are only serving the point even further.) But my score: 11 "DEFINITELY YES", 1 "No, but I have a SYSTEM" (which really means yes), 5 "often yes, but not always", 1 "not really relevant". So, 17/17. My summary of the points, in case it's helpful (sorry it's in my words, not Taylor's! It's just how my brain interpreted them). And yes this is missing lots of detail! 1 - Struggle to access certain thoughts/parts of the brain when not alone 2 - Struggle with the steps surrounding getting on and off escalators 3 - Struggle surrounding "how to appropriately exit a conversation" 4 - Struggle to pick clothes that meet all three criteria of "weather appropriate", "not problematic to my senses", and "situationally appropriate". 5 - Struggling to identify and explain feelings, especially when explaining/presenting them to others 6 - Struggle to comprehend other's expectations for oneself unless they're explicitly spelled out 7 - Struggle to pay attention or focus when senses are being overstimulated (e.g. "I can't hear you, the light is too bright") 8 - Struggle to keep stories concise, interesting, to the point 9 - Struggle when worlds collide (e.g. personal and professional lives overlapping) 10 - Struggle to resume a task after an interruption (sometimes also called "autistic inertia") 11 - Struggling with the concept of being responsible for another person, and functioning despite that consuming thought 12 - Struggle to eat in front of other people (both "being perceived" while simultaneously dealing with sensory stimulation) 13 - Struggle to think small enough for the situation, instead focusing (perhaps too much) on the bigger picture for clarity 14 - Struggle to identify one's own wants and needs 15 - Struggling when multiple questions are asked at once without being resolved sequentially 16 - Struggling with non-literal speech (e.g. metaphors, idioms) and thus losing track of the conversation/point being made 17 - Struggle to follow verbal directions (need for clarity vs. need to not ask too many questions) 18 - Struggle when someone else gives something factually incorrect (even if it's not key to the point they're making), due to a desire to have accuracy expressed. .... Phew, what a comment, sorry for the novel..

[@MomontheSpectrum]

I love your list!

[@randicatt13]

Thanks for the list, very helpful. I’m as yet undiagnosed, and have a memory disorder (SDAM), so that although I relate to all of these struggles, I would not be able to identify most of them without this type of reminder. It is so reaffirming to watch Taylor’s videos and read these comments. I’m starting a list for myself on my computer where I can compile examples, it should help a lot when I can find someone to get an assessment! Thank you.

[@annaf9821]

This decaribes my struggles so well! Yeah I have formulated some years ago that living with someone or just being in the same apartment/ house as someone makes my brain not working properly! It makes me passive of some reason…I’m wondering what “part of the brain as you mention” and what we can do about it. Would be interesting with a deep dive video about it! Especially as a lot of us still want to have other people around.

[@Adriell.h.b.]

OMG... I was part of a zoom group once recently where they wanted to discuss this thing that was the connection between, lets say A and B, but in my mind there was no connection between them!! I was so upset, and wanted so much to correct them, to say there was no connection, but no one else noticed, and I realized that it wouldn't really help the group, or 'make me any friends', so I just left the group. Thank goodness it's easy to leave zoom groups. If that was IRL, that would have been So Much more awkward, or uncomfortable. Ugh!! But all of those were relatable! it's so nice to know I'm in good company!