Monday Morning Podcast 1-8-24 | Bill Burr

Bill rambles about bob sledding, public restrooms, and gout.
New Dates Added: www.billburr.com/TOUR
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TOUR DATES ▶ www.billburr.com/tour
INSTAGRAM ▶ / wilfredburr
APPLE ▶ podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast...
SPOTIFY ▶ open.spotify.com/show/5SFiQlO...
WEBSITE ▶ billburr.com
#billburr #mondaymorningpodcast #comedypodcast

[@digamojones]

Hmmm. Wrong year there Bill.

[@coolbreeze3793]

Throw back episode.

[@chriswhiteiii]

@Djgamojones has a point. Evidence: Bill Burr started this episode off naming two thousand twenty fourrrr.

[@Sirch100precent]

it's not tho @@coolbreeze3793

[@debrashannon4515]

I believe it was two thousand twenty fowah

[@chriswhiteiii]

​@@debrashannon4515 ‼🎯✅😆😂🤣

[@NankerPhelge65]

HAPPY 2023 EVERYONE !!!

[@milescoleman910]

I turned 50 two weeks ago and I got the ministry joke. Also check out British parliament as they still make them address each other with honors even when arguing. ‘Will the ‘right honorable ‘ gentleman representing Coventry admit that his head has been up his arse for the entire session’ ‘Hear hear’

[@Downs-Indroam]

Canada too 😂

[@paulseymer8472]

Damn...a Ministry/Stigmata reference (and melody). I'm impressed Bill :)

[@AHighlander]

Was Stigmata a horror? Vaguely recall a trailer for that as a wee laddie..

[@PaulBolton-jl2qm]

From Canada....yes you can scare Black Bears, maybe a young griz if it has little experience with people, but don't ever, ever, never fuck with a Polar Bear.

[@exdus235]

😱

[@judaprophet21519]

😆🤣 ice teddies

[@thomasyancey5887]

I'll chalk it up to caffeine, but the tongue-smacking is off the rails today. Love ya billy❤

[@NankerPhelge65]

oh jeeesus thats all i can hear now ☹

[@AHighlander]

Hah. That cappuccino sounded damn good, in fairness.

[@yurrickhunt9707]

I can’t tell if Bill was kidding or if he thinks Cool Runnings was a documentary

[@AHighlander]

Hahaha…Certainly seemed like the latter.😅

[@mikefoxxx8691]

Oh Billy, Count Red Sackula. Thanks for another week there.

[@Scottaaa]

Freeze those paint balls

[@ThyClassics]

I really enjoy listening to burr, when he starts talking about the battle with thyself or anyone tbf anyone talking about ways they have self assessed and are trying to self develop to be better, very inspirational talk

[@chrisokeefe5766]

Jesus Built My Hot Rod

[@AHighlander]

Banger.

[@michaeldominguez6765]

The puffy shirt, and two and a half men lol

[@jeffleonardo5235]

Stepinophalis, like snufalufugus

[@jopo7996]

It's agout time.

[@coolbreeze3793]

I can barely walk over to my red meats.

[@marisgoldenhour6212]

Okay, totally here for the Ministry "Stigmata" drum riffs followed by the "in your eye" references made by the always surprising me Billy Beats Burr. 🙏🏾☺️💙🖤✨

[@BIG_TOE]

*ole billy new yeeeears*

[@alejandrosalas4588]

Great start Bill. Coming in hard!

[@judaprophet21519]

Happy Happy Billy Burr Year

[@kevinmccombs3201]

People that confidently confuse shit is hilarious to me! "The chargers QB Josh Hartnet" & "Miami's head coach Nick Kroll" had me🤣

[@josephhood1591]

The stigmata in his eye is what killed me!

[@TamK79]

Happy Monday Bill and friends!! ❤🎉

[@74jailbreaker]

Just realized the date on the picture for the video says 2023 😂😂🎉🎉

[@unwokehillbilly4827]

Stigmata kicks ass🤘

[@WP_3rd]

Bill hitting it outta tha paarrrk in the New Yeaarrrahhh! Hilarious!! Fawk BetMGM, the house ALWAYS wins!!!

[@judaprophet21519]

ALWAYS 😎

[@judaprophet21519]

Billy Bogota with the lip smacks and Pepsi talk. Juan Valdez sends his amor

[@carrollatkinson429]

Happy Monday to ya!

[@antstay2y]

My guy bill burr 💯💯🔥🔥🔥

[@jessickalush3305]

Hope he addresses the Kat Williams interview

[@phuckyou6314]

And the Epstein list…. And my email

[@ItsAllinTheDetails1]

Stoppppp sippinggggg😫😫😫😫

[@PJ.Rob06]

Happy monday bill

[@RIGTHEMORT]

33:45 JESUS CHRIST BILL. Earphones here. Maybe lay off the coffee again.... 😂

[@MahkyVmedia1]

I was nodding my head yes at that beginning then you sidetracked yourself with sports haha ha

[@zabalaan]

Thanks for being you and thanks for sharing🙏 I love you man ❤😊

[@holafceja]

Astigmatism sir, that would be astigmatism.👁

[@jamesmass1583]

Did Bill call Josh Allen Josh Hartnet? When he meant Joe Burrow?

[@luciferigno408]

If Bill starts sharing coffee art with the world that is officially the first sign of the apocalypse.

[@Nancy-pb6ie]

😂☕⚰️

[@greenderp]

yeah, 12 years too late IMO 😅

[@coolbreezy7092]

The lack of just googling it or cracking open a book amazes me sometimes... But we love you, keep up the good work lol and maybe you do have stigmata

[@oliverposniak1254]

Thanks for this Podcast. Bill's playground accident, "No country for Old Men "😂😂😂😎✌💪

[@greenderp]

oh damn, how did he predict the eagles downfall exactly a year ago?? XD

[@JG-vx4jc]

Love it!

[@TheSteveBoyd]

Merry Elvismas, Bill!

[@fredwithdaknowledge]

I need this rn

[@Triplet33333]

🙋🏼‍♂️ Hey, Billy Banged His Shin & 🗣️Shoulder 🙋🏼‍♂️

[@MynamesnotLisaitsJudy]

Billy Beats tomorrow night 🤘

[@leundrewilliams2433]

Good shit

[@TemakiTom]

The kite thing killed me.

[@LL_SHAWN_P____]

Let’s Go Packers!

[@schnurburtnstuffvideos467]

Oh god Adam-12, so right 😂😂

[@alittlecreepywhenyou]

Bill, you are very entertaining caffeinated. Not to say that you aren't always entertaining, but your timing and mental train of thought is eclecticly more apparent.

[@exdus235]

😎👍

[@ralphwiggum240]

caffeine replaces cocaine as you hit 50. Can't do blow after age 50, you will have a Haaat - Attack !

[@flangekiwi]

I'm sitting here in Aotearoa New Zealand. I don't have to worry about bears, mountain lions or raccoons. But the birds! Shitting on my washing! Confucius says: If the line is close to the trees, birds will shit on your sheets 😂 Edit: potato = 1 potatoes = more than 1 (There's English, and then there's American English 😎)

[@judaprophet21519]

Surely, ye speaketh truth unto thee

[@rancidcrawfish]

Are inglish is gud

[@angelaelliott2608]

Yay Bill!!! ❤❤❤

[@debrashannon4515]

The eye condition is called astigmatism, stigmata is some religious baloney

[@Marshall_Stacks]

Thank you. I was going nuts as a person who had to get glasses 45 years ago. 10 year old becomes instant nerd. Astigmatism means oblong shape that shouldn't be.

[@judaprophet21519]

Thought it was, spiritual salami 😆🤣

[@eliasmatthewortega6772]

Does the legend Bill Burr and amazing Nia respond? Happy New Year! I listen to you every morning in the shower with my speaker, especially on Thursdays! Is that weird! God bless you Bill Nia and family 🙏🏽

[@kristoferaigner4905]

Relatively speaking "Jesus Christ; I've got vertigo..."

[@fabiank3203]

34:01 "...Wired Magazine... is that for cokeheads?" as he stumbles through the sentence was definitely one of the highlights 😂

[@-bld-]

Second cup of coffee, look out world.

[@kimturco1324]

Lol😂 Adam 12 -- been there sadly. I guess I have a new appreciation for anonymity.

[@lucasszymanski114]

Keep up the great work and happy 2024! I just logged my first hour towards my CPL.

[@user-io4cq2ks5r]

Go Blue Billy Boy!

[@lanceprzybyla7662]

Its a "Progressive insurance tool".....wrong year in thumbnail

[@yuliyav4775]

Not only the 50 year old guys got the reference: I'm a 30 year old lay-dee and I absolutely Iove Ministry and almost all the work by Uncle Al!

[@tomroberts2135]

suddenly I found myself in love with the world and all i could do was dang a dang dang a dang along linglong

[@gongqi67]

I'm vertiginous, your funny Ol' Billy TNT.

[@_Desiree_]

33:46 😂😂😂😂😂❤

[@onepartyroule]

I love you Billy bald bollocks! Come to the UK!

[@_Desiree_]

41:38 😂😂😂❤

[@benmiz9742]

Holy fuck bill, you’re almost at a million subs✊🏻✊🏻✊🏻

[@michaeljerrymccarney4803]

Demon in your eye haha

[@coolbreezy7092]

Damn Bill stigmata is when you show signs of jesus's crucifixion

[@alesalas1181]

"Murder was the case that they gave me" ...... old billy is a low key Hip Hop head 💪🏽

[@jeremysmith5579]

Wanted to hear what he thought about the Kat Williams interview but it’s all good, plenty of comedians gave they’re 2 cents already, maybe some other time

[@callumcomrie]

Me too but bill is always pretty diplomatic about stuff like that

[@midnightsentry84]

DA' Burrrrrrrs..

[@truthcantbesilenced4533]

We are a 1/4 way thru the century already

[@4realtime783]

Hey Bill, Thanks for always checking in on everyone else and I. And you got a family? If Bill Burrs name started with a C, I'd call him a Carestien Bear over heaaaa

[@BrentButler]

I believe you’re looking for “stigmatism” or “astigmatism” depending on whether the eye, lens of the eye, or only the cornea is misshapen

[@spencerdawson9424]

I’m 27 and that Stigmata-Ministry reference killed me. I never meet anyone who knows that song!!

[@andrewh9629]

Astigmatism- i have a bit of that

[@eyeiess]

I realized what a loser I was when I could answer all of your questions about bobsledding from my Cool Running memories 😂

[@judaprophet21519]

Yea, mon!!! 😎

[@eyeiess]

@@judaprophet21519 Right?! There are brakes. The brake man is at the back. They learn the course, time the turns and practice as a team on dry tracks. Can’t believe I still have that up there. It’s been like 30+years, but now I want to see it again. 😂

[@Nick_315_Palumbo]

38:26 Ovaries Bill ovaries 🤣🤦🏻‍♂️

[@sarahnovamusicatlanta]

Finally

[@reneefahner3486]

Hey Billy pooper pants .. if it’s a ( Mini split ) in your garage then it’s like mine & instantly going to automatic setting from the remote settings . It will get warm then switch to butt ass cold on that setting . Make sure it’s on ( Heat ) only . 🙂

[@danflak2370]

Disgruntled flag flyer😅🤣😂

[@crumpcates1701]

You are no old man Mr. Burr! I prefer to see 55 as middle age, not to mention hovering is hard as shit, taking incredible coordination! Safe flying!🚁😎👍

[@Realygoodatbball]

Andrew! the date on the thumbnail is wrong!!!!

[@TheGoodie2]

I needed this today! Bill, you never fail to keep me laughing. ❤

[@tonybologna6484]

OLE SUNNY GINGEBREAD BILLY

[@fromthebasin]

Amen Bill! There is only one American flag. You want to fly a different flag? Go somewhere else. We got open borders. Go on, Git!

[@johnsimms8845]

He was the fucking Chief of Staff Bill. Day 1. Scandal 1

[@nickmargaritis3263]

🎉

[@kismet8010]

"They're the same color as me they wouldn't do that!" Man Bill summed up their mindset so well

[@drivin69]

apple cider is a great substitute for coffee pour onto coffee cup microwave 2 min good and hot its better acuwally ..

[@ItsAllinTheDetails1]

There’s not a single Philadelphian that knows wtf happened to our Eagles! Coach lost ‘em😞

[@tomroberts2135]

dude, listen to the song Stigmata he says what it is - it's the mark where nails went through Christ's hands into the wood and bled him to death. People who think they're so special that they're just like Jesus will say things like their loose hair line is their "stigmata to bear" as suffering in life.

[@kevinmccombs3201]

AYYYYYE Billy bear attack! You got it all wrong on the bear attacks. They just start eating you while your still alive with their Cobra Kai no mercy policy just like reptiles. It's hands down, the worst eaten by animal death possible.

[@ComaDave]

This almost 60 y.o. guy got the Ministry bit. Connect the god dammed dots.

[@ASabo-oy2oe]

He HAD to be trying to mispronounce all of those names right? 😂

[@criptard]

RAIDER NATION Billy ball sac

[@slimpickens7822]

28,000 views and only 800 likes what the hell people get your shit together and hit that like button !!!!

[@DrakonEquation]

Did anyone else realize that he typed 2023 instead of 2024?

[@jakeolthof]

All previous American flags are considered valid and current by an act of Congress.

[@phuckyou6314]

Yeah Billy has no clue 😂

[@Marshall_Stacks]

I think he's referring to the custom jobs that people make. (See: Trump Rally)

[@Marty4Life]

Bill, can you remember any reference? Literally can’t correctly name anything with a noun. You have the memory of a dead moth.

[@oliverposniak1254]

That cook that went to jail .