[MV] end of a life - Calliope Mori (Original Song)

[@Fyeenix]

Calli's comment during the premiere saying its okay to feel sad when something ends really hits hard today

[@yann14pr]

I got into hololive with council and I've never seen a full stream of coco but it still hurts the same

[@N_4747]

what happened today

[@yann14pr]

@@N_4747 coco's membership has oficially ended today and the free live chat as well

[@houndrysmagolyteofhope4661]

@@yann14pr I wonder if it had a relationship to Coco leaving... I remember when two months ago she was excited she wanted to collab with Coco a lot, she respected her its really heartbreaking. But I see she took all of Coco's words to heart.

[@ChronicalV]

@@houndrysmagolyteofhope4661 wait so was this about coco finding calli and changing her life?

[@PrettyPatterns]

Thank you so much for the opportunity, it was a pleasure to get to work with you ! I believe we both put a lot of effort into making this happen and i can't wait for other people to hear it !!

[@EstelleLux]

You guys are amazing can’t wait for it to premiere!!

[@PrettyPatterns]

@@EstelleLux Thank you so much ❤

[@samhue4194]

I'm looking forward to what you guys have come up with..

[@adhanakthepenguin6287]

I don't know if the fact that this is coming out on your birthday is a coincidence or not, but either way it's a nice surprise in addition to what's going to be an awesome track!

[@PrettyPatterns]

@@samhue4194 Thank you ! i Really hope you'll enjoy it !

[@stedeestelle2866]

When you play (1) Cursed night, (2) End of a Life, and (3) Live Again in order, you can sketch up a story somehow of sorrow, grief, despair, regret, acceptance, finding meaning, and then finally gratitude. (see edits below) It's a personal interpretation but yeah, music can be ambiguous and I believe that's part of what makes it wonderful, since more people can find ways to relate and subsequently cope. I believe I am not alone in saying these songs have helped and are helping me get through rough times. EDIT 1: I thought more about it, and yeah Cursed Night tells a story of meeting someone too good for yourself and getting to know one's dark past, while End of a Life is about how you had fun together but suddenly parted, while Live Again is being thankful or hopeful at least for everything that's happened. EDIT 2: Someone pointed out to me below in the replies that Live Again should come first following my interpretation, because End of a Life is actually reminiscing about the good old times. The reply makes a lot of sense actually, so revised order is (1) Cursed Night, (2) Live Again, and (3) End of a Life. EDIT 3: I have also just realized that Cursed Night may be a song directed to the Deadbeats' for their kindness and curiosity about Calli's story (because her story seemingly suggests great sorrow). "Do you want to see the beauty of this despair? This time, look for yourself." It still kind of fits the timeline, I guess? Hahaha man now I need to listen to all of her songs again.

[@pedrolft9010]

I think you discovered the true meaning of all these musics

[@Lyynnx-025]

wtf... my queue list is exactly as you just said.

[@victorsimplicio1290]

Don't know if this is obvious to Calli's fanbase, but I believe interpretations should begin with Death Arcana (from tarot). In a very resumed way, the Death Arcana means change. Following your line of thought, this song is about her reminiscing about her past, even though she knows it will never come back, since her old self is "dead".

[@thelonelycabin6859]

she is just giving us puzzle pieces with her music, so we can put them together and see the meaning, you're a genius

[@akumafuhen]

Mhmm yes I definitely see it, also if you heard her previous works. There a song called Soundless, for me... idk that song also fits into the puzzle. Also it's probably my favorites, I find myself going back to it alot.

[@chibichangas]

To this day, I find this song to be one of her absolute best works.

[@resilententity470]

true, no bm in it like most other songs

[@UBvtuber]

@@resilententity470 bm? bad mannered? bowel movement? What did you mean by this? lol

[@seanpaul1054]

Because this was packed full of feelings. Most of her songs now just feels like work if you know what i mean lol

[@8-bitromance43]

@@UBvtuber Perhaps they meant background management?

[@phoenyck]

I love her slower songs like this and Scuffed Up Age, so much meaning in the lyrics

[@DistractedGlobeGuy]

Well, since everybody else seems to be busy discussing how the lyrics resonated with them, I guess I'll just mention how great it is to hear Calli using the lower registers of her voice. Really complements the character's cool, casual persona.

[@Chocobyter]

This in fact is the kind of music that I love, so hear it from Calli is... So beautiful

[@OhWaker]

I like how she has bits where she varies the range by going higher.

[@scargiv1067]

yeaa! Thats true, not many people use their lower ranges so its so refreshing and cool to hear

[@DistractedGlobeGuy]

@@scargiv1067 Plenty of ladies do--they're called contraltos. It's just that Calli personally doesn't do it much, even though she's got such a great voice for it, so it's really nice on the rare occasions when she does.

[@lunar3sera]

​end of a life Mori Calliope [森カリオペ「​end of a life」歌詞] [Chorus] We'd run right through those nights I'll never find my way back to you inside this labyrinth of lights There was madness in the meaning Never laughless, we were screaming at the top of our lungs to the numbness This city never died I'll fly, no proof Those heights, I'll never find another chance to say "Hey, thanks for saving my life" I was hopeless, it was stinging Running roadless, we were singing at the top of our lungs to the numbness This city never died [Verse 1] What was the root of it all? I couldn't say Used to jump and then fall Rugged and clichéd Would shrug it off without complaint, not a sound No use in trying to find friends, 'cause in the end nobody sticks around It's when you shoved yourself into a crowded place that you turned around and found yourself in love in outer space Cue the reckless nights, no strings, laughing at our own dreams Just what the hell was so funny? Bark up the wrong tree, stumble, used to falling great heights Amidst a concrete jungle, singing 'cause it felt right We mixed the ennui and troubles, rhyming our discontent And though it's history, I can't forget the time that we spent Convinced that this could mean another end Exists between real and pretend A twisted alter-fiction where I missed my chance, did not ascend, and Disappearing into the mist of "never happened" is the me that I can never befriend I let it go [Pre-Chorus] Fade in, fade out This crazy dream Without a direction, floating aimlessly There's nothing left Back there for me Breathe in, but it won't stop the rain from pouring [Chorus] We'd run right through those nights I'll never find my way back to you inside this labyrinth of lights There was madness in the meaning Never laughless, we were screaming at the top of our lungs to the numbness This city never died But was there ever a soul inside? [Verse 2] Chasing fireflies between the soaring high-rises Left a trail behind, defined it "wasted time of our lives" Silent singer, overworked and underpaid Thinks an office is a coffin until off is where you're laid Yet a thought persists, an optimist who ought to be afraid Saw the "nothing wrong" in writing songs behind the lonely shade Is the world a sadder place without the words that you conveyed? When the ladder fell and shattered every bar that we had played? Does it matter in the end the sound diminished and decayed And your friends grew tired of fantasy; you're wishing they had stayed? You don't get to say "I miss you," you watched your heroes fade Into the rear-view mirror of the villain you portrayed Stop the pity party, listen You don't get to be dismayed You don't get to be emotional, feel blessed you got it made These the best of years of life because you chose to make a trade Recollect the days you hoped and you prayed for this What is there to miss? [Pre-Chorus] Fade in, fade out This hazy dream Without a direction, roaming aimlessly There's nothing left Back there for me Pretend it's the end of a made-up story [Chorus] I'll fly, no proof Those heights, I'll never find another chance to say "Hey, thanks for saving my life" I was hopeless, it was stinging Driving roadless, we were singing at the top of our lungs to the numbness This city never died I'll say goodbye to the soul inside [Bridge] (And yet somehow, there was romance In our self-hate, "we've got no chance" In this light maze, but let's hold hands Through the night haze, we'll run so fast 'Til the school chime, 'til the train runs We know it's time, we're the sane ones Waking up now, to the "real life" Let me daydream, 'til the next night) I'll keep waiting I'll keep waiting for you [Outro] Waking up now, to my real life Let me daydream, 'til the next flight Drowning so long, I got older Now the crowd's gone, is it over? Is it over?

[@flambelk4489]

Thanks!

[@v_jaeleen3116]

ARIGATHANKS!

[@AnvilJeff]

Um... thank you for the effort, but... Calli already put all this in the video. In multiple languages 🙁

[@AshThumbsUp]

@@AnvilJeff Sometimes the lyrics are late, so you can read this out and sing along better I suppose, you can also try reading it while thinking how the song goes in your head

[@AnvilJeff]

@@AshThumbsUp very true, i wasnt trying to be "that guy" or anything. Its nice they put in that much effort so others can enjoy the song at their own pace

[@taco5021]

I guess since we're all sharing why this made us cry: About four and a half years ago, my fiancée had her meet and greet with Calli. There was a lot of times where she had stopped me from over working myself. I'd probably have worked myself to death if it hadn't been for her. I don't think I ever told her that she saved my life. We used to think that we'd make music when we finished college, but now that she's gone. When she died, I really lost all my passion for creating and playing music. Recently I've been wanting wanting to write again, and I think this might be the sign I needed. Thank you, Calli! You may not have saved my life, but I think you saved my heart.

[@udon_]

I’m so glad you took this in a positive way, good luck in making your musics!!! I’ll be watching over your KZbin if you decide to upload anything there!

[@heikocaiko7035]

You have my best wishes too, good luck

[@muoiz6745]

You know Calli irl? Cool

[@meteorshowerz_]

calli hadn’t debuted 4 years ago, wdym you had a meet and greet with her??

[@Veishan]

@@TeRpFlyers He means she died. "Bruh" indeed

[@Braxophone]

I don't really watch a lot of Hololive but sometimes I stumble on some gold like this. This song is amazing Mori

[@utopes]

Glad you enjoy it! It truly is one of the best ngl, definitely one to come back to!

[@rs_fury5290]

I recently stumble upon this song too have and been listening to it, insane work

[@tabbune]

Hi Brax

[@Hamza2_7272]

i've honestly never watched hololive nor am i interested in it but i saw this song in my recommended and genuinely had no clue this was related to hololive until a few minutes ago lmao, its just an amazing song on its own

[@sullygoose]

“Thinks an office is a coffin, until off is where your laid.” Some of the best word play I’ve ever heard. “Office” obviously rhymes with “off is”, but that’s not all. “Off is where your laid” referring to being laid off and fired from your job, but also using the term “where your laid” to refer to being laid to rest in a coffin. And it all ties together with the theme of being overworked to the point of death. Genius.

[@xeal9674]

I'm so glad other people pay attention to this. As a word nerd, Calli's consistent mind-blowing wordplay is what keeps me coming back.

[@imamwahyudi7731]

it could also mean c chan made a coffin for calli to turn into her current one. the word laid is the foundation that c chan "laid".

[@puddingspy9837]

That's my fav line as well

[@korsekil]

I also see "death" as not being entirely literal, but the death of your soul amidst the concrete jungle. It feels like there's also a theme of nostalgia, of freedom, of the dreams you once had that you had to kill in the office. It's definitely something a lot of us have experienced amidst our careers in jobs we've lost the passion for, or never had.

[@ethanslik5141]

To me this tells a story of jumping in to a world that doesn’t feel like it has room for you. Roaming aimlessly with no direction, Calliope left her old life in a risky trade that ended up paying off. She “flew” with “no proof” it would work out, and here she is looking back at the world she left behind to pursue it. She longs for her days of playing fantasy games and “playing the villain” in tabletop games. She tries to shake it off and be grateful for what she has, now that she got what she prayed for, but she has a nagging feeling that she owes something to the people she left behind. My belief is that the city that never died is the reminder of the story that happened there, but it’s only a reminder that it happened, it lacks the people (or soul) she remembers was there, and wants to say her goodbyes to.

[@YumoCH]

The city could be the ruins we see in irys's caesura of despair mv?

[@traveler_SEKAI]

preach brother. preach.

[@ChronicalV]

thank you, my brain is so small im struggling to understand every line

[@notaprouwu9801]

Ty bro u help a lot

[@jhaydee7203]

Thanks, I'm more sad now.

[@RosemaryShinbuki]

Calli knows her way through words with her music. She gives realistic advices and pushes us to work hard. Her words are never a miss and add to the fact she shows us her genuine emotions. Calli is the best

[@samhue4194]

Calli is definitely the best. Our Adorable Oshi

[@Jeremy-it1ks]

Calli's music has helped me through tough times. She is a blessing

[@okay38]

Calli's music really motivated me a lot she is the best dad ever, also i heard this has alot of lyrics? As a person with breathing problems, its lung torturing time! edit: i was wrong, the music is so calm that it made me emotional, this is why i love Calli

[@lijhay2889]

how did you guys comment 9 hours ago when this video got released just 10 mins ago

[@USSAnimeNCC-]

It beautiful I almost cry

[@inalamna]

We always return to calli's song when a holo member leaves. But this time it's her gen mate 💔💛🥀

[@terrorbrutal3926]

o7

[@MinniMaster]

This song hits hard for a lot of people. Of the infinite possible branches of our lives, we only ever get to pick one. All we can really do is think about the different paths and the what-ifs, the alter-fictions and the versions of ourselves that we can never befriend. "Talented" is quite possibly the biggest understatement in the world when talking about Calli.

[@vassalofthenight9945]

This one hit me real hard because i think about the choices i have made in the past very often. I never made any big mistakes, just a lot of small ones but my life is exactly the situation people describe when they say "I don't know what would happen to me if i never met..." "I don't know where I would be if ... hadn't reached out to me". I know what would happen and I know where you'd be. I live that reality everyday and it's shite.

[@DarkAdonisVyers]

Don't pine for different paths thinking that they could have been better possibilities. Be happy that you avoided the worst possibilities. If you're alive and free, then you've definitely avoided those.

[@richardpaulson6002]

The part that hits me most in my current life is. . . well. . . what happens if there actually were choices, but, you never knew they existed back then, and thus, missed them? At least with choices there’s a set of paths that you could possibly go down, but, what about those who get “railroaded” in life and then get slammed into a pigeonhole that can’t be escaped because, somewhen across the previous route in life, a butterfly effect occurred that cascaded into the modern day and left you in a life dead-end? . . . oh, uh, pardon me for piping up, your thoughts brought something to mind I’ve been struggling with for. . . well. . . a decade.

[@aoipanda25]

@@DarkAdonisVyers glad I scrolled through the comments. Needed this message today 🙏🏼

[@Thiccness_Is_Delicious]

Dwelling on the past is the path to eternal sorrow, you must stand firm in the choices you make always look forward never back the past is the past for a reason.

[@tribacioustee2846]

There's nothing fake about this type of longing. This feels like the flipside of Live Again - where that song celebrated moving on, this one mourns what once was. Because it's not easy to just say you've moved on. Sometimes you relapse back to those good times. Should you feel guilty? Would life have been better had you stayed? Even if the head has answers, the heart remains clouded. And yet, to say you've had those times at all is a kind of blessing. That's the bittersweet passion I hear in this song. Truth is, we don't know if it's over. Because we're still alive, the beat goes on.

[@drained1177]

Ligmaballs

[@VeylmanTheRock]

I think in this case the past is what's haunting her. Battling feelings of inadequacy and a right to be where she is now.

[@henrycooper3431]

Tbh that is what happened to me And as such this song does give me happiness and sadness at the same time

[@sheepcommander_]

WAIT I JUST REALIZED "LIVE AGAIN" "END OF A LIFE" HUH

[@박태양-e4w]

It's like a song that looks back on the popularity gained by playing an artificial character made by a company that doesn't show his true self.

[@JeloUnderscore]

“An office is a coffin and off is where you’re laid” is the most genius form of wordplay I’ve ever seen

[@JeloUnderscore]

@Sasha Lemay thanks friend!

[@tizi087]

that line actually bugged me. because it implemented that office is not the place you want to be, but is suppose that isnt always true. I know people who love their office job, it is work and exhausts them but they still love it. The line itself is good but a bit to generalised

[@JeloUnderscore]

@@tizi087 True but I was referencing the wordplay on both laid off and office which I found to be one of the smartest lyrical wordplays I've heard in a while

[@carrot708]

The line's actually "thinks an office is a coffin until off is where you're laid"

[@KiraVexing]

@@tizi087 It's not generalized. This is her opinion. It's how she views an office. I agree with her.

[@PrettyPatterns]

We really made it that far huh ? You guys are insane, thank you for everything 💜

[@SJCS2]

Yep 10 million views congrats mate

[@miraivox112]

This is my favourite of her original songs and the MV is such a good display of emotion, congrats🎉

[@GhostlyNomad130]

You Are An Inspiration in so Many Ways! Thank You for being an Amazing Human Being

[@KonekoArvi]

I always comes back to here everytime I feel like i needed some place to think. End of life and Resting Power is my favorite Calli song. And also I love your work with Enna

[@n0va807]

Congratulations my guy. You did it.

[@tumbledryshoes]

Calli has a way of making every song she writes sound like it's going straight from her heart to yours, she's incredible.

[@Alarm26]

Calli proves time and time again that she is an amazing lyricist. This song is just another fantastic example of why she is one of my favorite artists

[@Joe_Mama.also_YTHandlessuckass]

Honestly same, this song in particular reminds me of Twenty-one pilots minus the metal screaming, maybe that's how we'll get the Calli x Rushia collab

[@Jeremy-it1ks]

Calli is my favorite artist artist compared to the modern mainstream artists . I admit I may be biased haha. I've said this before, but I'll say it again Calli is different because she doesn't flex her wealth, btches, and fame. Moreover, when she raps or songs she's doesn't mumble or stutter. Which secured her as my favorite streamer, rapper, and person.

[@Confron7a7ion7]

I always find it interesting when we get the tiniest glimpse of Calli's old life, this song seemingly partly inspired by it. The contrast between an artist who hasn't "made it" and one who did. The story that exists between the two. The idea that they're treated as separate despite both still being her. She has a very unique story that I hope she gets to tell one day.

[@VCofdaG]

Absolutely agreed.

[@jahuuuu9625]

I wish she ended the song with the sound of rolling dice similar to her first song with hololive

[@maxrelax5940]

i dont rlly follow vtubers so idk if youre talking about something in the lore or the meta of her irl life and then her playing calli but i find the dynamic of the latter so interesting. the way i inturpret some of her songs (and some of the other vtubers) is that they allude to the irl person and the character she plays. itd be so interesting to hear someone knowledgable anaylize it with this lens in mind

[@sebastiangniadek6473]

@@jahuuuu9625 which song was that?

[@Gulyus]

@@sebastiangniadek6473 I think it was RIP "Excuse me rudeness, but could you please RIP?" at the KZbin URL /watch?v=5y3xh8gs24c

[@Hexra_]

For every graduation, I always find myself back here. I hope Sana finds peace and comfort in her future endeavors.

[@alexandresilva2665]

Now after Ame sang this one, I'll forever associate it with her.

[@ebi-chan1771]

here after ame. things never are the same whenever one of the girls leave.

[@AnhKiênPhanTrần]

oh man, here after Chloe and Fauna

[@pieapplebomb]

I love the line "There's nothing left back there for me." The first time, it's a heartbreaking realization that she can't go back anymore, because there's nothing left there for her. But the second time, with the context of the lines "Feel blessed you got it made" and "Recollect the days you hoped and you prayed for this, what is there to miss?" It takes on new meaning. It's still a bit sad, but it's now a confident declaration of acceptance. She doesn't need to go back, because there's nothing left for her there. She's moved on. At least, that's how I interpret it.

[@Altrantis]

I think it's both. She's objectively better now, doing what she wanted, but also missing those early days and the people in them, unable to go back, both because it's impossible and because it'd make no sense to.

[@starswirI]

in my opinion, the line RIGHT before that "*you dont get to be emotional*, feel blessed you got it made" makes me think that yes, she doesnt need to go back but shes like. shunning herself from missing those times. shes like telling herself that she doesnt deserve to be emotional about the past because right now is so much better. its really sad because she's allowed to miss those times even if they were bad or just overall worse than now. this is how i took it!

[@Altrantis]

@@starswirI Yeah. Sometimes we miss the good parts of worse periods in our lives.

[@amiamagi]

Just what’s there in the past to miss? She’d wish to succeed, she’d wish someday to be a [BIG SHOT]. And here she is, a corporate VTuber with 1M+ subscribers. She doesn’t want to go back, because all in the past were wishes and prayers for succession. You don’t just miss it anymore.

[@starswirI]

@@amiamagi theres so many things to miss with being a 2M subscribers channel: missing being anonymous(like COMPLETELY), missing where u lived, missing ur family, missing ur old friends. i dont think her entire past was her wishing to be this. sure she spent time, but there had to be Some good moments, and thats what im reffering to.

[@BlueSpooky]

I really appreciate Calli's songs. They always give me inspiration to try again when I'm about to give up. Same with Watame and Suisei. I know nobody really cares about my story, but this one really resonated with me. I was a youtuber that hit it big way back in the day, nearly 7 years ago. I had been making videos for years for basically no audience, until final about 2 years into it, I finally got my big viral hit that started taking off and was really good. Unfortunately a friend who I considered a partner and brother at the time decided he was jealous of my success and tried to hurt me. It really messed me up, and I stopped making videos as often. My chance at my big dream, and success passed me by, and in the blink of an eye before I knew it, new people rose up in my genre and I had been completely left behind. I resigned myself to believing I was just a washed up nobody who would never have that chance at success again. The dream had already passed me by, and I missed my chance to grab it. I'd heard about vtubers before but never paid much attention. One day I stumbled upon a song of Cali's and it sucked me in. Then I found Watame. Hearing their stories made me want to try again, and instead of video making feeling like a prison trapping me in a painful memory, it began to become fun again. Now I'm trying new things, making new types of content, and I feel like there's hope again. Everything isn't so gray. I know this probably doesnt really matter to anyone, but I just want to say thank you to Cali and to the hololive community for giving me the strength to try again. Even if that time in my life is over, now is another time.

[@theonlylooker]

go on, keep going forward i believe in you

[@holdeenyo8914]

damn...

[@cilantro9342]

never expected a horror genre content creator to watch vtubers but whatever you got my sub

[@un44r84]

Dude, keep moving forward and keep trying

[@shamorrito0512]

keep going man! if it somehow helps, your comment matters to me, i hope you enjoy your life and the good opportunities it gives you now and in the future

[@AbyssHuntedVideo]

This is a bittersweet masterpiece I'm going to be looping for a long time, and if what I think this song is about is correct, it's really relatable to something we all have to go through at some point: saying goodbye to life as you knew it when a big change happens in your life. (Warning: song analysis wall of text ahead) While some of Mori's prior songs were about coming to terms with the new challenges of her new career as a Hololive VTuber, streamer, and entertainer, I think this song is about the other side of the change: coming to terms with saying goodbye to her old life as a Grim Reaper. Mori has talked before on stream about how she has old friends she hasn't talked to in a long time, and I'm sure she's so busy now with streaming and projects that she hasn't had too much time to reconnect with them, which would only make the divide widen, and that's painful for anyone to go through. Another big part of this song, I think: she's also talked before about how she honed her rap skills in the Underworld's underground scene, starting off with an audience size smaller than you can count on one hand, and she's mentioned how she got a lot of helpful advice from her peers in the Underworldian scene. It might not necessarily be the same in the Underworld, but from what I know of the underground rap scene in the human world, it's a big struggle to even survive as an artist and many rappers have to join together in close-knit groups to survive. If Calli left an existence like that to join Hololive and crank out hits that topped the iTunes charts, while her old homies continued to struggle just to make it day by day, I could see how that could be a guilt weighing down on her and how it wouldn't be so easy to simply go back to her old crew and pretend like it's just another day in the underground. "When the ladder fell and shattered every bar that we had played?" I really love both the symbolism and the double (or more?) meaning in this line. I'm assuming the fallen ladder refers to um... well let's just say a certain situation in the human world and underworld that's making it rather difficult to convene for musical performances. And for many artists who were already struggling, that could possibly mean the end of their careers. You could say two kinds of "bar we had played" were shattered: bars as in verses of rap no longer being performed, and bars as in literal bars that serve drinks, where musicians would often perform but now have been forced to close. "And your friends grew tired of fantasy, you’re wishing they had stayed? You don’t get to say I miss you, you watched your heroes fade Into the rear view-mirror of the villain you portrayed" This is the part of the song that I think supports the explanation I have come up with so far. I think some of Calli's old rap homies had to up and leave the rap scene due to the struggles of the current situation getting too hard - even ones she looked up to a lot. But while they faded into obscurity, Calli only moved forward to great things. She feels guilty, like she was a villain in their eyes. "Stop the pity party, listen, you don’t get to be dismayed You don’t get to be emotional, feel blessed you got it made These the best of years of life because you chose to make a trade Recollect the days you hoped and you prayed for this What is there to miss?" I think with this Calli is saying she misses her old homies and feels nostalgic for the old days, but is also being critical of herself: how is it, she asks herself, that she now misses the old days when she spent those old days hoping for the existence she has now? From here, I think the rest of the song is coming to terms with the fact that things will never be able to go back to exactly the way they were before. And in the end, she can still look back fondly at the old times even though she knows she has to "wake up now to the real life" and focus now on where she is in the present. And in the end, there's still a hope. "I'll keep waiting for you" - just as Calli found a new existence for herself, maybe her old homies have found new existences for themselves too. And who knows what the future holds. Perhaps there is hope of someday seeing her old homies again and reminiscing. "Now the crowd's gone - is it over?" The song doesn't end with with a definitive "things are over" - it ends with a question. Maybe things are over, maybe they are not. One can only see what lies ahead. And thus, that's why I call this song a bittersweet masterpiece. It's a journey, starting with a happy memory of the past, quickly turned into a saddening lament for days that can't be relived, turned back again into a sliver of hope for the future. One of Calli's finest songs yet. And I can only wait in eager anticipation for the amazing songs I know she'll keep bringing. Biggest of ups. (One last side point I want to mention - I don't think the release timing of this song coinciding with the closing of Coco's free chat was anything more than a happy accident, as Calli always releases songs at the end of the month. With that said however, I do think Coco's graduation could maybe have been an influence on Calli choosing to write this song. After all, Coco also had to say goodbye to her life as she knew it and all the friends she made in her time with Hololive...) EDIT: And remember, this is just my interpretation! As is the case with Calli's songs, there's usually many possible interpretations, and the one I came up with may not have even been what Calli intended. But it's always fun to try to figure out the "puzzle" Calli leaves in her lyrics, and if anyone thinks I might have missed something or gotten some details wrong, feel free to share your own thoughts on the song!

[@Bazzarspider123]

Great analysis, highly appreciate the context behind the song.

[@ophthalmology8569]

Thank you for the beautiful analysis. Agree with everything you wrote here. I think this explain all the love and support our girls have received, as we realize behind those cute anime models are real people with real emotions that we can sympathize with.

[@UnforsakenUmeko]

Wonderful interpretation!

[@Dominik-K]

Love the interpretation Abyss. Dankeschön 🧡

[@jaylew1853]

this song hit closer to the ones she released in her past life. it felt weird to me seeing all the comments saying how much they enjoyed this song and what a banger it is when calli is singing her her heart out about a weight she is carrying, as pretentious as i may sound saying it.

[@wanderlust1282]

Calli - I don’t know if you’ll ever read this, but here are my words of thanks anyways. This song speaks to me so much due to me taking an opportunity to live and work in another country. “Waking up to my real life, let me daydream to the next flight.” - The daydream is living in the moment of wherever I am in between flights. I’m solitary and have roots for a moment until I get to travel again, which is what I live to do. “You don’t get to be emotional, Be blessed you got it made!” - I’m torn over that my life in my current city is over (the experiences and memories, the friends, all of it) are over, but even more is ahead. I remember I got a chance that few others got. “Those nights, I’ll never find my way back to you” and “This city never died.” - My time here is over, nothing can replace it, but it is over. And the city will go on after I leave. This song means a lot to me, especially tonight. Thanks for writing and singing it. I’ll be listening to this when I lift off whole watching this chapter “fade into the rear view mirror.” Thanks Calli.

[@jetstreamsam8221]

HOW DID MY GUY GET SO MANY LIKES

[@Need_RnR]

☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️ She doesn't care ..... and neither do I....... GET HELP/ ""THERAPY""" ..... !!!!! ... & STAY *OFF* THE *DRUGS* 1111111

[@Azukano]

Such a refreshing breath of air from Calli in this piece of art. Always a pleasure to hear new songs from her.

[@ApexReign]

Everywhere we go, you’re there. o7

[@Dominik-K]

Yeah, I can only agree! And this one hits close to home for me

[@Jonathanloh1992]

Did you guys get the lyrics? She is telling us like a message.

[@MFconfuse]

I like your pic hahahah

[@otap2040]

and i was wondering where he was lol

[@KalebAsmadi]

I hope that people love this one. A title like this just screams heart and soul were poured into this track very much. There's several hours until it goes live, but I have a good feeling that people will be able to vibe to it. See you all after the premiere! EDIT: Now that it's premiered.... You absolutely delivered a beautiful song. A farewell of sorts, and a movement forward. As I said, I sincerely hope you're proud of this song. It's incredibly powerful, and I hope it can be an inspiration, a signal, to others. It's very fitting that a reaper would deliver such an impactful song about moving on, though maybe in a different way than some might expect. Love it. Love what you do. I'll always love my Mori. ❤❤❤❤

[@Artermist]

The picture already looks really good!

[@ToaHurlak52]

Calli pours her heart and soul into these songs, she's so great. Love listening to her and Suisei

[@queeenie]

it's just so soft and melodic so tbh this is one of my favourite songs from her 💕

[@superidol699]

**End of a Life - Calliope Mori Lyrics:** We’d run right through those nights I’ll never find my way back to you inside this labyrinth of lights there was madness in the meaning never laughless we were screaming at the top of our lungs to the numbness this city never died. I’ll fly no proof those heights I’ll never find another chance to say hey, thanks for saving my life I was hopeless it was stinging running roadless we were singing at the top of our lungs to the numbness this city never died. What was the root of it all? …I couldn’t say. used to jump and then fall, rugged and cliched. Would shrug it off without complaint, not a sound No use in trying to find friends, cuz in the end nobody sticks around It’s when you shoved yourself into a crowded place that turned around and found yourself in love in outer space Cue the reckless nights, no strings, laughing at our own dreams… Just what the hell was so funny? Bark up the wrong tree, stumble, used to falling great heights amidst the concrete jungle, singing cuz it felt right we mixed the ennui and troubles rhyming our discontent and though it’s history, I can’t forget the time that we spent convinced that this could mean another end exists between real and pretend a twisted alter-fictions where I missed my chance, did not ascend and Disappearing into the mist of “never happened” is the me that I can never befriend …I let it go. fade in, fade out this crazy dream, without a direction, floating aimlessly there’s nothing left back there for me breathe in, but it won’t stop the rain from pouring We’d run right through those nights I’ll never find my way back to you inside this labyrinth of lights there was madness in the meaning never laughless we were screaming at the top of our lungs to the numbness this city never died. But was there ever a soul inside? Chasing fireflies between the soaring high-rises left a trail behind defined it “wasted time of our lives” silent singer, overworked and underpaid chinks an office is a coffin until off is where you’re laid yet a though persists, an optimist who ought to be afraid saw the “nothing wrong” in writing songs behind the lonely shade is the world a sadder place without the the words that you conveyed? When the ladder fell and shattered every bar that we had played? Does it matter in the end the sound diminished and decayed and your friends grew tired of fantasy you’re wishing they had stayed? You don’t get to say “I miss you” you watched your heroes fade into the rear view-mirror of the villain you portrayed Stop the pity party, listen, you don’t get to be dismayed you don’t get to be emotional, feel blessed you got it made these the best of years of life because you chose to make a trade recollect the days you hoped and prayed for this What is there to miss? fade in, fade out this hazy dream without a direction, roaming aimlessly, there’s nothing left back there for me pretend it’s the end of a made up story I’ll fly no proof those heights I’ll never find another chance to say hey, thanks for saving my life I was hopeless it was stinging driving roadless we were singing at the top of our lungs to the numbness this city never died. I’ll say goodbye to the soul inside. (and yet somehow) (there was romance) (in our self-hate) (“we’ve got now chance”) (in this light maze) (but let’s hold hand) (through the night haze) (we’ll run so fast) (‘til the school chime) (‘til the train runs) (we know it’s time) (we’re the sane ones) (waking up now) (to the real life) (let me daydream) (‘til the next night) I’ll keep waiting I’ll keep waiting for you Waking up now to my real life let me daydream ‘til the next flight drowning so long I got older now the crowd’s gone is it over? is it over…?

[@DavidTokugi44]

Seeing the entire lyric laid bare really helps see all the intricate rhyme schemes and inter rhyme schemes, thank you for posting it. Really helps see the process of how Calli writes her song

[@destros6576]

*when you also make a lyric comment 5 hours before and it gets 10x less likes* 💀

[@destros6576]

Good comment tho either way

[@superidol699]

@@destros6576 Idk lol, I made this for myself so I can read the lyrics better. Didn’t really think it would get likes lmao

[@superidol699]

@@DavidTokugi44 Yes definitely! That’s why I did it, it’s super helpful to be able to look at all the lyrics of Mori’s songs, especially the faster paced parts!

[@moxxe]

I lost my boyfriend this month. He was a fellow deadbeat and he really loved your songs so much. I keep this song on repeat every night since his death. Even though it stings my heart quite a bit, it makes me reminisce about all the nights we went through when we were still together. Thank you for creating such a beautiful song, Calli ♥

[@kajuncheng245]

Small platitudes from a stranger might not mean much, but know that I know that feeling quite well. I lost my father 5 years ago, and I still cling to the hobbies we used to do together. May your boyfriend rest peacefully, wherever he may be.

[@bananaice3469]

I'm sorry to hear about your loss How a song could open so much emotion is beautiful May your boyfriend live in peace

[@zw845]

Sorry about your loss, hope you'll get better bro. o7

[@RedNeor]

I'm so sorry for your loss. I hope you find comfort in your memories of him.

[@ytho9229]

I'm really sorry for your loss. I pray you find strength to get through this loss and find happiness like that again.

[@TwoAllNighters]

My best friend passed away 2 months ago, he was a big fan of yours, Calli! The song reminded me of him and how grateful I am to him, it felt so nice to feel like I could connect with him again. Thank you for making such a lovely song.

[@thestowrymakerz8256]

May he RIP, may the pain be bearable for you

[@fireagehero1101]

I feel you brother. RIP to your homie and stay strong

[@bandita7088]

lov for u my homie and enjoy ur life

[@renaldelvinh]

my condolences brother, may he rest in peace, i bet calli greet him as soon as he left

[@gatitixd9996]

rip for your friend. its nice that with this song you could like "connect" with him i bet he was really important for you. at least with this song you will always remember him

[@GamersPrey]

This song was fantastic. You did such a great job Calli. Here before a million views!

[@butler_killer]

Before 100k :)

[@MisaMiniwashere]

Here on premiere

[@eidolon5739]

Before 200k :)

[@t65bx25]

Before 200k :)

[@uishinigami2197]

@@MisaMiniwashere Same

[@SophiesTheDevilOverlordLady]

"It's okay to feel sad when something ends really hits hard today" That had us emotional, Calli. Your deadbeats will support you more. ❤

[@jellan6789]

God I Love this song, This broke me. Soon to be an official dead beat but we all pray for your Happiness Calliope. Thank you so much for giving so much of yourself for our sake.

[@ronillust]

That first line always hits like a truck.

[@きゅるるん]

yo, my man. Clicked on your channel for your great art and them I found out you were a fellow dead-beat and that was a very welcome surprise.

[@crispyflippers.9522]

Love your vids!!

[@sirsebastians]

Isekai im comming

[@mouchee7258]

not so much as the last line. but thats probably just me

[@Mitsuki-jg3nz]

bro, love your art and tips. Yeah, Calli's songs are always amazing, hits ya like a train.

[@ElectricNova15]

This is beautiful...It feels like a counterpart or sequel to Cursed Night in some ways. The more emotional Calli songs are the ones I love the most

[@coins_png]

It actually feels connected to all the music calli makes and it hits me so hard.

[@BenjaminSteber]

Feeling that 'cursed night counterpart' comment so hard right now but even cursed night didn't expose this much vulnerability. I kept from listening to this song after the first time because I knew it would break me once I took a deep dive. Goddamn. I wasn't wrong.

[@coins_png]

@@BenjaminSteber dude it did break me. I was gonna get stuff done but I'll have to wait for tomorrow, I feel exhausted. You know when you remember a memory so vividly you feel the exact feelings you had at that moment ? Like that but with the worst parts of my life.

[@tacticallemon7518]

i can’t tolerate slower songs (such as this one and cursed night) but for some reason, once i click on either of the videos i just can’t click off

[@deadmacgaming9066]

Cursed nights became one of my favorite songs of all time I can see this being in the same time line

[@DenjaX]

"It’s okay to feel sad when one story ends. It’s also okay to keep remembering it happened." - Calli

[@iPurplePikachu]

After watching your 3rd Anniversary stream I never knew that you almost scrapped this song. I'm glad you didn't because its such an emotional song that causes me to reflect on myself a lot. And each time I listen it brings out complex feelings I can't even describe but I feel are manifested into the song. I can't imagine the emotions you felt while writing this but its such a banger. Its been 3 years and I can't wait to see what else you do. Keep on killing it Calli.

[@EienNoKurushimi]

She was going to scrap this song? I never knew that. We would have never gotten this amazing song if she scrapped it.

[@MAXIMUS_15]

Was she going to scrap my favourite song? Im so happy that she didnt do that

[@flame3724]

Do we have a clip of she talking abt to scrape this song?

[@rraxford]

I swear after 5-10 years, Calli's songs would dominate Spotify and iTunes. People just haven't discovered such gem.

[@Thatonedude227]

They already do. Your Mori was #1 overall in Japan when it released

[@plowo3021]

@@Thatonedude227 Not only in Japan ive heard but im not sure

[@MinMinMin1226]

Already do. Your mori was reached number one on the US and Japan hip-hop charts. And Death Beat jumped to the top of the Hip-Hop/Rap download album charts in both the US and UK in 2020

[@zenmode3125]

No wonder we're "deadbeats", she's killing us with every banger she releases edit: after listening to the song around 10 times in a row, all i can say is that this song cuts way deeper than i thought it would

[@tizi087]

I agree, its not a song you casualy listen to and just feel the beat like her other songs (which are still awesome) but this song made me think altough i suppose i am in the lucky position to not face the problems she sang of. But still it's amazing how versatile calli is in her singing

[@AngelTheButlerOfTime]

When Calli said this was gonna be different she wasn't kidding. I'm speechless. All I can say is thanks to fate for putting me at this moment where I can listen to your Music.

[@BrainletReviews]

Every big musician has their own song about their past and the nostalgia for those simpler times. Bryan Adams has summer of 69 which is by far my favorite song of his, Ed Sheeran has Castle on the Hill which is a more exhilarating and powerful version of that...... and then Mori has end of a life. Out of all of those songs, this one sticks out because it's not wistful, it's not happy...... it's sad, but also contemplative and the drums / saxophone give it forward momentum. As if to say "yeah i'm sad that my old friends aren't by my side, but i'm still going to keep moving forward even if it hurts me on the inside". I don't think there was quite any song that really filled that vibe in pop culture which is probably why while Cursed Night showed she could be more than just a goofy reaper rapper, this was the song that REALLY resonated with people because it's not just sadness.... but it gives a feeling of longing for old times while the world keeps moving.

[@Ovalee]

Something about this song, the lyrics, the track, composition… it feels like your songs really come from the heart. I can’t say precisely how, but they just simply resonate with my soul and make me feel like I’m not alone in the midst of all adversity. You’re a damn good artist, Calliope. ❤︎ and you work with amazing people too that help make it happen! Thank you for your hard work.

[@TheGreatSammyJack]

Calli's music is always a mystery: Is she gonna hit us with a banger? Or is it going to be an emotional dive that takes you on a feel trip? Either way, this song is fantastic. Not just the vocals and lyrics, but the music too.

[@udon_]

Tbf this is the first song I heard from her, but since you said that, I’ll go head over to listen to other songs too. I’m a fan of her now.

[@kronii-chan8413]

Why not both

[@Erick_Cuevas]

In this case... it's both

[@MR-tk9ff]

I am not good at English. However, the song was so good that I interpreted all the lyrics through a translator. The song and the lyrics go really well together. I'm watching the broadcast, but I can understand only a little bit of the content, so I'm learning English. Don't work too hard on the broadcast, but do it while resting. Because we want to see you for a long time! (It might be weird because I used a translator.)

[@Luis-ws2hx]

Don't worry your message was well conveyed, glad you liked the music and Calli motivated you to learn english. / 걱정하지 마십시오. 메시지가 잘 전달되었습니다. 당신이 음악을 좋아하고 Calli가 당신에게 영어를 배우도록 동기를 부여해줘서 기쁩니다

[@monstertokusatsu6042]

Hey I just use Google translate :V

[@Billy-mj9jf]

Your English is better than most

[@bonebard6178]

@@Billy-mj9jf i mean, he used a translator. im sure google appreciates it though lol

[@jiminson5025]

민제씨 우리 모두 화이팅!

[@chickinfingers0069]

Calli probably has one of the best discography i’ve seen in a while, every single one of her song has it’s on uniqueness, and just like her, her songs are timeless. Especially this one, it may just be my preference, but I feel like I wouldn’t get tired of this song. Her songs are always like a breath of fresh air, I hope more people hear her songs.

[@Trivial_Man]

Difficult. This song is a lot to chew on. Beautiful though. Not one that I'm going to play on repeat, but I'll keep around for when I need it. I'll always appreciate Calli's willingness and ability to use her music for true expression. She really is something special and I'm so glad she's found this stage to share that. Even if it has cost her something, I think she's happy she has too.

[@VCofdaG]

^^^^ This guy gets the message of the song.

[@ToasterBath]

I don't think it's meant to be a played on repeat song. I think it's there to get you back on your feet when you need it. Like you said, something that you would keep around for when you most need it

[@Lightrim706]

true but i probably might put it on repeat just to try to hang on to how i feel about my life...

[@ToasterBath]

I like how the join date goes down as you go through this comment section.

[@neeha9449]

If you opened the replay chat, at the very end Calli commented something that hits really hard back when this premiered, but now hits harder: "​It’s okay to feel sad when one story ends. It’s also okay to keep remembering it happened. Thanks for listening, everyone." o7.

[@funijettmain7916]

o7

[@serenorussel1559]

o7

[@KratosDivine]

What happened? :O

[@yabazyabacoffee]

this and live again make me feeeellll

[@AJarOfYams]

o7

[@nightstar2197]

Two years ago today, this song released and sparked a fire in me I didn't know I had. A song that made me acutely aware of my position in life, but also somehow motivated me to greater things, resonating with me on a level I had never felt before. If I had to chose a singular favorite song for the rest of my life, it'd be this. Thank you Calli! Here's to more ahead!

[@rillzy9637]

Calli has a way of writing songs that I really identify with. I got a feeling this one’s gonna hit hard.

[@mae.1651]

It really did👌

[@Isawyaka]

No flashy lights, no spitting dis track, no extreme highs and lows in rythm, or top-/bass-line, just a raw, delicate and beautiful piece of art about all the small tragedies of life. This jazzy sound really made up to the song and was so refreshing.

[@fcantil]

Dammit Calli. This one really hits. It's so bittersweet, and here's what I think about it: We always make decisions in life, be it bad or good, and each decision will drastically change what happens to us in the future. You are always changing. Regardless, you reached where you are now. Every now and then, you reminisce the old times where maybe you were with your best friends, or maybe it was one of the best times of your life. But then you wish you could just go back to those happy times, but you can't. And that's just how it is. We can only cherish these memories and continue to keep making new ones. "It’s okay to feel sad when one story ends. It’s also okay to keep remembering it happened." - Calliope Mori 2021

[@harudo_nanoda]

Who else is back here... ⚓️💜

[@frozenkitsune3639]

It's a terrible day for rain 🌧

[@Yomikey01]

I'm always back here Almost every other day or every night

[@wowza018]

Yeah

[@Jimgouzhui1389]

here

[@dhazo]

Here

[@VenomK3KW]

Calli's normally known for spitting pure fire with her lyrics, but this is a different type of heat. This is warmth. Warmth from her heart, warmth from the deepest part of her soul, warmth she's had to cultivate for herself when the people she looked up to, people she thought would stick by her through thick and thin, turned their backs on her. This is a side of Calli that is both immensely sad, and incredibly beautiful. I feel humbled to know this part of her in this way, even if it is just through a screen and through my headphones. Thank you for this, Calli. Thank you for letting us in, even if only the slightest bit.

[@gudoivonleiden9254]

This song really hits in the kokoro. So much so that even the comments do so.

[@mymusicacc5359]

It takes someone who can spit fire to provide warmth even on the darkest coldest friends

[@twins1133]

I feel like this is a story. Pretty relatable too. The chorus talks about the past, where they were chasing their dreams. Usually when someone chases their dream, most don't make it, the "madness in the meaning." First verse talks about their attempts to make it to their dream, people often try and fail several times before making it, or give up like the friends that couldn't stick around. They laughed at how crazy trying to make it would be as well as talks about fear that even the closest friends will disappear someday. Even if it is "another end", she won't forget the time that she's spent with them. Then she talks about a what if, where she didn't make it, but let's go of that. Second verse is where is they into more detail, where they keep trying to be a singer, they were overworked and underpaid, but they didn't want to give up and get a regular office job. At that point, they might as well have stopped trying to "live" in a sense, because at that point, they are just working to stay alive rather than go for something they always wanted. They also talk about their doubts, if any of what they do will ever make a difference in the world, if I didn't become a singer, would the world really end up worse without me? Then it moves on to imply that their friends gave up on the dream and only she persevered, but she tells herself that she can't miss them, or wish they had stayed, be happy that she at least made it. She's living a good life now, but at what cost? This is the decision where they traded everything to get where they are at now. The pre-chorus probably hurt me the most, when you look back and try to go back to that time you're happy with everyone, but you can't. Nobody's there anymore, they've all moved on. I remember a lot of my old friends, but when I happen to message them, quite a good chunk of them don't remember me anymore. I had a dream that one day I could spend time with them like the old days, but that place to go back to, doesn't exist. The rest of the song until the outro, is them waiting for their friends who shared their dream, to catch up to her, but when we see the outro, she wakes up. The friends are gone, the dream is now also over considering the crowd is also gone. Asking herself, is it over? tldr; People had dreams when growing up, as life goes on more and more people give up on their dreams to simply stay alive, while others try and fail until they get to where they want to be. Friends fade in and out as you go through life, most of them never staying, even if you try to go back to those days, you can't as they've all moved on with their lives. You can try to wait for them to find their way back to you, but it's more often never going to happen. So you wake up from thinking about the past, realizing that it's all over and it's not coming back.

[@raqqa7046]

Fuck, we were chasing our dreams too but when I barely passed college only 2 of our friend continued the chase leaving us 5 behind, I am one of those who failed to continue the chase. It hurts a fuck ton I wanna cry so hard. I can't believe the dream we used to talk about failed and abandoned

[@Hyzengard2]

Beautiful

[@NoName-pj1xg]

I'm gonna use this for my essay thanks man

[@cjohnson3836]

@@raqqa7046 The "best time" to work for your dream was 20 years ago. The 2nd best time is today.

[@t1tutel441]

such an underrated comment for the amount of thinking it must have taken from you nevertheless thank you for the analyzing of the song, very cool

[@Sunch_yt]

Can't really describe how amazed I'm rn. Everything about the song is so beautiful. It feels like foating in the flow of sadness while watching the night sky. This one really hits different, Calli. Salute to you and all the creators!🍷

[@toykn]

一年以上聴き続けて未だに飽きない、一生聴いても同じなんだろうなこの曲は

[@54xe-kisenonn11]

聞いてるかい?

[@toykn]

​@@54xe-kisenonn11聴いてるよ

[@jako7120]

This song seems like its made for a person or people that helped Calli in her past life. Big thanks to them for helping Calli reach this point and spread the happiness to all of her present viewers. There is nothing wrong reminiscing about the days when you were trying to make it big. The journey is always something to miss, whether it was a good or bad time. But once you "make it," realize you're still in another journey. Appreciate the time before and appreciate the time now. Future you will surely be missing the time you're spending right now. Thanks for the amazing song, Calli. I love trying to find the meaning every song.

[@gudoivonleiden9254]

This song really hits in the kokoro. So much so that even the comments do so.

[@haruhivt2405]

More like " thanks for saving me, but now you see me as a villain. So... even tho saying goodbye hurts and i wish it didn't end this way, i'll say it and move on to live the life i hoped and prayed for". "You" outside the chorus reffers to herself in the past/underworld

[@inaminute1826]

@@haruhivt2405 metal af ngl

[@skyrevanvalor2128]

To me the journey is the golden age, all the effort, blood and sweat you go through to get there, all the people you meet on the way and the ones that stay with you till the end through thick and thin. Once you make it to the top of your own summit it’s the best feeling you’ll get but after a while when everything is the same it turns into a silver age it’s still good so it’s something you definitely don’t want to let go of because if you do that’s when the fall starts.

[@inaminute1826]

@@skyrevanvalor2128 right.

[@MintyPolaroid]

Haven't vibed while tearing up in a while. Only Calli, man, only Calli.

[@dodo81210]

日本で夢を追い続けてやや4年目の外国人です。 今年は家族と友人に会えず、自分の目標を見失うつつあるが、 この曲の歌詞がすごく心打たれます... 素敵な歌ありがとうございます！

[@user-doriko]

Good

[@sadegh4982]

This hits differently now 💔 Things will never be the same Ame 💛

[@ErolithBaladar]

Well cause everyone is talking about what this meant to them I’ll explain mine This song to me is about the old childhood memories you had with friends and wishing you could go back to them which is the fading in and out (back to reality). But it’s also about growing old and how life changes and the roaming aimlessly is when you don’t have a true goal to follow you are just walking to find out where you end up. The part that hit me the hardest was “I’ll never find another chance to say thanks for saving my life” that one I could relate to so much cause when I was at the lowest part of my life and my parents disowned me and called me a failure a disappointment that my dream was dumb and even told me to kill myself once I was on the verge of losing it. And during my lowest I bumped into a friend that saved me he was very friendly always caring and he made me feel like I had value and said what I made was cool and that what I did and had a passion for I should follow (Game design & computer science) which actually reignited my flame for that again but one month he started to act really strange and I knew something was off and the week that I was going to ask if everything was alright and that I can help him… no that I will help him… he… killed himself… and that’s the moment I’ll never be able to thank him for saving me because before him helping me unknowing I had a date I was going to kill myself and because of him I never attempted on that date… all I can do now is follow my dream and carry the memories of him so that he won’t die because I believe someone only dies once they are forgotten and for anyone who doesn’t think they are anything you are something to someone they might not have told you. You might think you’re death won’t effect anyone but it effects people who truest cared about you. And if you need help ask for it your friends or someone even a stranger because the most painful thing is noticing something wrong and not being able to save them I still hate myself to this day that I couldn’t save him and I want to cry and cry but my friend if he knew I cried so much over his death I don’t think he would’ve done it if he knew I would’ve cried that much but to pay him back for saving me I have to live my life to the fullest and if there is an afterlife then I know he is waiting there so when I arrive I can tell him about my entire life even if he watched it all he would still sit there and listen to me…

[@EvyDevy]

Wow. That's a very emotional story, as well as inspirational. I'm so happy you made it through it and I'm sorry for your friend though he's already living on through you and the story of how he saved your life. I hope your passion for Game design/Computer science and VTubing take you to amazing places.

[@samhue4194]

Hope you keep living your life to the fullest.

[@Leonardo-nm4zc]

I'm not even sure how to answer this, all I can say is "never lose your faith, keep believing".

[@nazigorfurher4403]

Damn man i wish you for the best and chase your dream. I dont care what exactly your dream is all i care live your life to the fullest and finish it with a bang.

[@christiancalma3394]

I wish you for the best, such an emotional story for me, keep living your life, experience the beauty of this world and live life the fullest

[@acheronsgf]

“Is it over?” For me, I haven’t lost any friends to death or anything (thankfully) but this song still hits really close to home. When I was younger, seven or six maybe, I got an xbox for my birthday. I made some online friends. This one guy, who we’ll call ‘FC’ here, was one of my two closest friends I had growing up. Countless days of playing games together, I didn’t think they’d ever end. Now I’m here. As we grew up he became an aggressively terrible person. Cheating on his partners, disrespecting his parents, toying with his friends etc. Nobody is perfect, I know that, but we’ve hit a point where we can’t go back to how things were. He’s done too much damage. Me and the other closest friend still keep and touch and are friends till this day. It really is such a shitty feeling seeing somebody you grew up with turn into a monster. Me and the friend have been urging FC to get help for months. We’re just watching from afar, but man does it pain me. Please cherish your friends. Cherish the memories you make with them before it’s too late.

[@-ss-8606]

:(( i feel that

[@acheronsgf]

@@-ss-8606 it sucks but it’s just a part of life. people come and go, we’ll get through this

[@IchinoseCh]

Yeah, I have a similar experience of a good friend who turned out to be an asshole in the end.. My (former) friend who used to play with my group a lot chose a girl he met for less than a year over our 6-7 year long friendship. Needless to say, Its quite obvious that he never cared about our friendship.

[@acheronsgf]

@@IchinoseCh he saw an opportunity and took it. your group will find a new person, don’t worry. people just come & go

[@IchinoseCh]

I guess I didn't really paint the full picture with my last comment. Well, the girl was one of my other friends ex. But, the dude decided to take her anyways despite us telling him that it will break the friendship. The girl is a circle breaker. She made both of them feel special just so that she can break em apart.

[@J7T800]

"I'll never get a chance to say hey, thanks for saving my life." I never really could thank my friend enough for taking me under her wing, despite her having to fight against her own demons. I would never have stayed if it wasn't for her. There's no greater sacrifice than love. I wish I could've told you how much I appreciate your care. May your soul rest in peace, Hiromi Chan. You're in Calli's guidance now.

[@Ioguidolapecar1980]

however I did not know that this song had this meaning, but honestly when I listened to it for the first time, even though I was Italian I knew a little English and therefore I understood what was written sometimes, it reminded me of sad things that had happened in the past, honestly thankfully no friends died for me, but knowing that some people have died some friends or girlfriends, it makes me sad, but I know that at least they are in heaven waiting

[@Ioguidolapecar1980]

You know, I also had internal demons, the fact of disappointing everyone, and also that of being alone and that I was a useless person, but thanks to my friends and friends who are very important to me,They made me realize how important it can be, although, I still have a little fear of disappointing my friends and being alone.

[@Ioguidolapecar1980]

But anyway you are right, there is no more sacrifice than love. I know it's a sad thing to talk about the death of a person dearest to you but remember, your friend even if he is dead has turned into A ghost, and its spirit will accompany you until your death.

[@Ioguidolapecar1980]

But I also had a friend of mine who saved my life, and I sincerely thank her.

[@Ioguidolapecar1980]

Comunque se non vuoi parlare va bene, sinceramente non obbligo nessuno.

[@KoyaHarmony17]

I was listening to this song just now, It made relate to my problems in life. Got bullied because of how I speak, Got ignored a few times because I didn't fit right in, And got scolded because I keep breaking promises and let everyone down because of how stubborn and hard-headed I was. I was at my lowest point during and after the pandemic. To the point where I was depressed and stressed out. Because I lost two of my most important people in my life. I was eating and sleeping out of frustration, Until... You guys came into my life. Especially you, Calli. Your songs saved me. Including this one. 2022 was the year that Vtubers came into my life. After Kpop in 2018. And I wanted to say, Thank you. For being here in Hololive. Without you, Myth wouldn't be the same without our lovable reaper-rapper dad. I maybe sixteen, but you inspired me to keep going foward and achieve my dreams. You were my inspiration, Among my other inspirations. You were the reason why I loved music in the first place. Thank you, Calli. From now on, I'll support you, and Myth until the very end. Thank you.

[@chukyuniqul]

This song speaks to the feeling I get whenever I remember I'm nearing my mid-20s. It's such an odd feeling of sadness for what was there and isn't anymore. The existential angst of no longer being young. The terror of being alone. The suffocating knowledge of seeing my life in front of me. Even if I know that the path I've chosen would be an interesting one even without things going wrong (which they inevitably always do), this song is such an outlet for the inevitable dread of routine that builds up in everyone. Calli, you are an inspiration to me. At the basest level, your dedication to becoming who you wanted to be (and maybe always knew you were) is something I aspire to do myself.

[@LordSquish]

Dude, trust me - mid twenties is still very young; you're not even half way to being properly old yet! 'The' path you've chosen may seem suffocating from where you are now, but there's plenty of time left for 'the' path you chose to become 'a' path of many you've walked in your long, long years on this planet!

[@chukyuniqul]

@@LordSquish things are changing a lot in the mid-20s. You aren't just a baby adult who only has adult rights but still is very much a dumbass teen, you're starting to perceive the scope of your existence that's been so small up until this point. It's like my first day in the college main amphitheater when I realized I had left high school. Except every day. It's like a 2nd puberty, except social not biological. And it's not easy, everyone understands that. And when things get too hard, sometimes, you want to go back to when things were easier. And that was the feeling of loss I was talking about. And getting older as a concept, I still know I'm young and when I get called a kid I don't even bat an eye (well, when it's not in a demeaning fashion) but I also understand I'm not the youngest. There's people who can speak and even have IDs who greet me politely! It's nuts! Still, I appreciate you attempt to ease me, but even a shrink would have a hard time of it.

[@Neonagi]

It doesn't change as you reach towards your late 20s either. It's a whole new mental struggle that you have to fight to stay on top of, but don't give in.

[@MrAbcabsabc]

自然に涙出そうになった。 歌詞も、叩きつけるような歌い方も、 全てが心を揺さぶってくる。 ありがとうカリオペ。それと楽曲に関わった全ての方々✨

[@sucrosesnowstorm]

JPの友人たちが私たちと同じようにカリオペの曲を楽しんでいるのを見ると、いつも素晴らしいと思います。私たちが日本の歌を楽しんでいるとき、あなたはこのように感じていますか？(すみません、私は DeepL を使用しています) Loving seeing the JP-bros loving Calli's songs as much as the english speaking community, I like to believe they feel the same when the roles are reversed.

[@Arcashine]

I'm a musician who gave up. I've seen my friends and peers build lives out of music that I'm jealous of. There's a lot of self hatred I have for giving up. But I'd never let that get in the way of how proud I am of those who kept going. I'm so proud of you, Calli, and you don't owe anyone the guilt of succeeding. Please, for the dreams of those who've fallen, push as high as you can.

[@spencerstabio5936]

If I'm not prying too much, why did you give up being a musician?

[@Arcashine]

@@spencerstabio5936 It's a really long story, but tl;dr: I put all of my effort into reaching a place that would help me become a professional musician. That place ended up kickstarting a battle with depression and taking away any hope I had of making it in the way I thought I could. I knew if I stayed on that path it'd ruin my happiness and I wouldn't achieve what I wanted to. So I took a different path. It's been bumpy, but it could have been a lot worse. Also, I just want to say it is so amazing to have made this comment 4 days ago and see the new heights Calli is pushing in such a short time. I know it's probably been in the pipeline for weeks/months, but it feels so good to see the success of someone directly after wishing it for them.

[@spencerstabio5936]

@@Arcashine Yeah. I just started checking out her music. I'll have to see what else she's got. Well, now I wish YOU success and happiness in whatever avenue you choose. We all have the opportunity to leave our mark and add something good to this world. That includes you.

[@Arcashine]

@@spencerstabio5936 Thank you so much. I ended up becoming a streamer and full time trading card grading middleman, which I love. I have my own little community and thank my stars every day for them. I hope the same for you! I definitely don't think Calli is for everyone, but no one can deny how fucking hard she works. The amount of music she's put out just this year is fucking STAGGERING to think about. A full album with another on the way, a bunch of singles and multiple EPs. She's an absolute powerhouse of creation and you can see how much she's exploring and growing throughout all of it. I remember watching her debut and kinda dismissing vtubers as something I wasn't interested in, but she tangentially fell back into my feeds around a month ago and I rediscovered her. She's become a huge inspiration for me and who knows.. maybe one day I'll give music another shot.

[@5pmFeels]

o7

[@MrTubeStuck]

The song feels like its such a personal song. Calli talking to herself, realizing what she worked for all the years is what she is now and learning to love the effort that she poured into it.

[@wintermute5486]

this and resting power for sure. shes so hard on herself. i hope she finds healing someday.

[@LC_Lapen]

This one's gonna be a heavy-hitter, a wonderful song in its own right. But for people unprepared, take care: Reaper knows exactly where the soul lies, and you can bet your J-Chad coin that this one's gonna get right to it. So for those reading this in the Future- man can our Mori write a song or what?

[@TheEngieTF2]

I bet you haven't noticed that Calli timed her premiere exactly as Coco's Free Chat stream goes down and her membership is closed

[@lop90ful1]

@@TheEngieTF2 pleas touch grass

[@wessardwite765]

@@TheEngieTF2 What does that have to do with anything?

[@authenticinari-fox8164]

@@lop90ful1 Pathetic you were really here for 8 hours attention seeking, go get therapy.

[@FrankToasty]

It does hit way too hard

[@zanwrightmfwr756]

I've been hesitant to comment about this song because someone had probably commented the same experience. I just wanna say, thanks. This song makes me feel so happy and relieved. I've let go of what happened. Just a day after this song uploaded, I get to reunite them all, my friends, again after 3 years of hating each other for what happened. I feel happier now, I could say I've crawled out from that 3 year depression ridden hole and I just feel genuinely happy. I couldn't say that we would still be together, but at the very least we let go of any grudges we had and go different paths without regret. This song feels like an ending of my own story and a recall my journey for that 3 year period.

[@gudoivonleiden9254]

Music is a great medium to confront and deal with emotions. I've had a time when I hadn't listened that much music for a while during hard times and when I listened to some of my music again, oh boy did those bottled up emotions get free. And now I sometimes use it set my mood right.

[@WeebHutJr]

Right? I just genuinely wish Cali all of the best, and that I completely understand the kind of guilt of survivorship bias she's feeling in this song for being one of the ones that "made it", with the whole rush of Hololive feeling like a whirlwind. Life gets crazy sometimes, and I really hope she is okay. Your voice is beautiful, know that so many people love you.

[@pirajacinto4]

That's such an awesome thing to hear. Holding onto old issues is just bad, unhealthy, and creates tension when there is none. If only we can all be kids again and just spend time and hang out and make good moments so those small, negative moments doesn't become unhealthy holes that's in your soul in your adult life.

[@Crayon_Cannon]

The lyrics to this song….they’re something special. When we move on to new things, we’re always leaving behind a part of ourselves, and when you think about the past, you might catch yourself stuck in what if’s. At least those moments are immortalized in the memories that we make. Thanks for the song Calli, the Deadbeats love you for everything you do ❤️

[@samhue4194]

Oh T3 got a preview..

[@35PHaaton]

@@samhue4194 no, the song is out for everyone to listen to.

[@DR_REDACTED]

@@35PHaaton where?

[@35PHaaton]

@@DR_REDACTED here on youtube. Those topic bot channels. There's even an instrumental.

[@DR_REDACTED]

@@35PHaaton it says its not available tho

[@nightjai498]

i knew i would see people here after the announcement... 💛💛💛🔍

[@suohkawakami135]

My past wasnt really a good one....always getting bullied, always getting hit.....No one helped me back then. I even tried to K myself three times.....But I got help from a special Person a Person whos not here anymore. This Song reminded me of my past, not in a bad way. I can proudly say that im really really happy to be here today. Im truly thankful Calliope Mori for this beautiful Song. The Lyrics will always be in my heart. Thank you

[@sugarqbs]

glad you could be with us here today, buddy

[@suohkawakami135]

@@sugarqbs

[@bluecreator7779]

Eyyyy another person with a really shitty past. As s fellow survivor I'm happy to see more around. We're thriving from now on! ^^

[@suohkawakami135]

@@bluecreator7779

[@netherwasp]

good that you're still alive go stride further bro.

[@chrisdray5325]

I finally realized why I couldn't stop thinking about this song. I realized that I have never had that raw experience of enthusiasm and chasing something I loved to do. And in this song I realize just how much I yearn for that passion that I just can't muster to anything that I'm actually wanting to do. Thank you for this song, and for this itch that I just can't quite scratch, even if I know a bit more about where it is now

[@cjohnson3836]

Finding yourself is as much a worthy goal as any. Rather than fixating on chasing something specific, enthusiastically experience different hues and shades of life. Eventually, you'll find your favorite color.

[@anastaciusofthepun5152]

Now will you scratch it?

[@MigiTheHand]

keep on trying new things every day. You'll find that passion one day. Best of luck.

[@justsomeone1176]

Same, today I decided that I wanted to try out pixel art because I needed something to do, something that I can look on and tell myself that I tried it whether it ends well or not, good luck in finding something fro yourself!

[@tehdarkswordsman6863]

Keep searching, everyday find the joy in something new and you'll find what you've been missing in the days you've lived over the years of your lifetime. Much love and happiness to you, my friend I've not yet met.

[@Aruvn]

Another banger! Really enjoyed this one! Well written as well~

[@tizi087]

especially such a diffrent kind of banger, Just another style than (at least me) knows calli

[@garlic-attack]

This really hits harder after the Ame's announcement. I will wait forever if I have to 💛

[@AKA-uk8ft]

💛

[@theKarateRedbelt]

I feel like this song can be described as "Chill beats to drown your sorrows to". Not in a bad way, but more of a "I didn't know I needed this" way.

[@みじんこ-u8m]

I'm Japanese, but her lylics is very attractive and strike my heart. This song was greatful as always! I'm sure I'll be hearing this song over and over again.

[@houndrysmagolyteofhope4661]

Its very good to heard that, friend.

[@Jeremy-it1ks]

JP bro thank you for supporting Calli despite the language barrier Edit: Or you might speak English lol still thanks.

[@みじんこ-u8m]

I'm not really good at English, so I'm glad to get the kind words :) I want to watch her live-streaming with you someday.

[@E4439Qv5]

_Greatful,_ intended and taken to mean "full of greatness." I could offer a more standard alternative, but the word has such an earnest feel that it's perfect the way it is. You rock, friend. Thank you.

[@RagoEv]

This song has such a nostalgic tone, like looking back at the road you've through, saying goodbye to an old friend or maybe a self old, achieving what it looked like a dream... There is just so many feelings involved, it's really incredible. Calli never ever disappoints with her lyrics, and damn, feels like she keeps improving more and more. Music and mix are so enjoyable, was listening to the instrumentals only, it felt so short lol big ups to them too for making such an amazing work!! And looking forward to more to come ♥️

[@yd_]

2000s rap vibe with modern lofi type musical devices and visual aesthetic. Nostalgic yet recent.

[@DandeDingus]

Very fitting to song, yea

[@mmmmmmmmm755]

This song is incredible, a lot of people can relate to the feeling of being a isolated artist thinking that they are not reaching out to anyone despite being in a huge crowd or community. For every artist that makes it big, there’s thousands of smaller artists with little to no attention being drawn to them. I really find comfort in this song as a artist and I thank Calli for making this amazing piece of music and for expressing her feelings in a powerful and strong way.

[@ImFrelled]

Than keep moving forward. Maybe you're one of the people she's waiting for, and when you catch up to her, you can tell her... "No, it's not over yet."

[@zephyr_monochrome]

It's always these slow, melodious songs of Calli that I always find myself being attracted to. There's just something about how she portrays her songs that seem lonesome and relatable yet unique and inspiring. This one was no exception. Thank you for such an amazing song, and amazing job to all who worked on it.

[@kei-ji9cp]

There is also the pain of becoming famous, and reaching beyond your dreams... I love you, Calli.

[@CappuccinoSquid]

One of those "looking out the window" tracks for sure, living somewhere between grief, nostalgia, and yearning. Sometimes you just gotta have yourself a sigh, man.

[@WithADanceNumber]

Maybe had like 10 listens or so now at this point and to me the song is about Calli saying GOODBYE and THANK YOU to her old online persona who had to die in order for Calli to come to life. Like how her old persona helped her feel shielded from the world when she first moved to Japan and realized the whole world is kinda shitty in its own way, so she made music to sort out her feelings about that. And now that Calli is here she doesn’t need that strength anymore, she’s made it. Yet despite having made it there is a sadness in the song, like she still loves who she was and what she did before Mori.

[@CainLupus]

That's kinda the impression I was getting during my second listen and it kinda made me choke up for a second in the middle of it, almost teared up a bit at the "thank you for saving my life" line

[@Aegis---]

Although tbf her old persona isn't gone, she's just putting her current career ahead of it, she doesn't plan on quitting

[@NIREV]

@@Aegis--- she already talked about it on a stream but that's pretty much what she's implying coz she can no longer perform on the same venues and with the same people she's been with in the last few years coz it's all gone and they moved on to other things

[@jacobrcox64]

The variety of music and emotions that Calli is able to convey and creat never ceases to amaze me. Every song is so unique and this one is no different, so powerful and emotional. I cannot wait to listen to it on repeat with the others waiting for your next original or cover Calli! Beautiful work as always, you never fail to amaze us deadbeats

[@negativeghost2480]

Here after the Amelia announcement 💛😭

[@shizzzxd]

This song hits so hard when you're crossing to a new phase of your life filled with those doubts if you can manage your way there. Coming out of your comfort zone may be hard but once you're out, there's a lot of things the world has to offer.

[@purasa2425]

Get Ready Dead Beats. And remember Our Boy is okay.

[@rainaazuki0306]

We'd run right through those nights I'll never find my way back to you Inside this labyrinth of lights There was madness in the meaning Never laughless , we were screaming At the top of our lungs to the numbness This city never died I'll fly, no proof Those heights, I'll never find another chance to say "Hey, thanks for saving my life" I was hopeless, it was stinging Running roadless, We were singing at the top of our lungs to the numbness This city never died What was the root of it all? I couldn't say Used to jump and then fall Rugged and clichéd Would shrug it off without complaint, not a sound No use in trying to find friends 'Cause in the end nobody sticks around It's when you shoved yourself into a crowded place That you turned around And found yourself in love in outer space Cue the reckless nights, no strings Laughing at our own dreams Just what the hell was so funny? Bark up the wrong tree, stumble, Used to falling great heights Amidst a concrete jungle Singing 'cause it felt right We mixed the ennui and troubles Rhyming our discontent And though it's history I can't forget the time that we spent Convinced that this could mean another end Exists between real and pretend A twisted alter-fiction Were I missed my chance, did not ascend, and Disappearing into the mist of "never happened" Is the me that I can never befriend I let it go Fade in, fade out This crazy dream Without a direction, floating aimlessly There's nothing left Back there for me Breathe in, but it won't stop the rain from pouring We'd run right through those nights I'll never find my way back to you Inside this labyrinth of lights There was madness in the meaning Never laughless, we were screaming At the top of our lungs to the numbness This city never died But was there ever a soul inside? Chasing fireflies between the soaring high-rises Left a trail behind Defined it "wasted time of our lives" Silent singer, overworked and underpaid Thinks an office is a coffin Until off is where you're laid Yet a thought persists # An optimist who ought to be afraid Saw the "nothing wrong" in writing songs Behind the lonely shade Is the world a sadder place Without the words that you conveyed? When the ladder fell And shattered every bar that we had played? Does it matter in the end The sound diminished and decayed And your friends grew tired of fantasy; You're wishing they had stayed? You don't get to say "I miss you, " You watched your heroes fade Into the rear-view mirror of the villain you portrayed Stop the pity party, listen You don't get to be dismayed You don't get to be emotional Feel blessed you got it made These the best of years of life Because you chose to make a trade Recollect the days you hoped And you prayed for this What is there to miss? Fade in, fade out This hazy dream Without a direction, roaming aimlessly There's nothing left Back there for me Pretend it's the end of a made-up story I'll fly, no proof Those heights, I'll never find another chance to say "Hey, thanks for saving my life" I was hopeless, it was stinging Driving roadless, we were singing At the top of our lungs to the numbness This city never died I'll say goodbye to the soul inside (And yet somehow, there was romance In our self-hate, "we've got no chance" In this light maze, but let's hold hands Through the night haze, we'll run so fast 'Til the school chime, 'til the train runs We know it's time, we're the sane ones Waking up now, to the "real life" Let me daydream, 'til the next night) I'll keep waiting I'll keep waiting for you Waking up now, to my real life Let me daydream, 'til the next flight Drowning so long, I got older Now the crowd's gone, is it over? Is it over?

[@samanthahebras441]

Thank you for the lyrics^^

[@thatextrovertartist5474]

thx

[@indeedinteresting2156]

This song is about to hit different again, help. 🌏😭

[@alphalion1959]

tell me about it

[@2057ram]

Saying goodbye and fading in fading definitely hits the difference now

[@jayzenstyle]

@@alphalion1959 sana is graduating from holo. Sad day indeed.

[@Pantalaimon91]

I'm starting to hate the month of July. Can we just skip it next year?

[@E4439Qv5]

@@Pantalaimon91 You won't wanna do that for 2023. Gut feeling, it's gonna be a surprisingly good month in an otherwise wack year.

[@GekTC]

No matter what style or genre of singing Calli chooses, it always sounds like the highest quality stuff you can ask for it. Such talent is worthy of praise and recognition beyond just idol status or Hololive things - this is art through and through.

[@E05_Mabashi]

I love all of Calli's songs, but these calmer ones are the ones that hit me the most and make me listen to them everyday. Thank you for another song to my playlist Calli.

[@raithebatou]

Calli's lyric writing ability and then expressing the emotion whilst singing and rapping is on another level. Not a rap fan by any means , but Calli's songs just hit a chord with me.

[@SgtBaha]

This song feels like it took something from me and it's only going to give it back when I finally say I'm proud of myself. I promise to make that happen.

[@EditronSpawn]

I believe in you.

[@Betito1171]

That’s poetic in of itself. I very much feel the same way. I want to make something worthy of such music.

[@MichaelC007]

This is proof that music is art. Everything about this is incredible, the lyrics the vocals the rap the track the emotion. It all radiates with a sadness that brings you to tears. Truly amazing Calli.

[@IO-BLANK-OI]

you a know a song is good when you can relate to lyrics

[@goukenslay7555]

Any medium can be art

[@c.karnstein3299]

That emotional sax, too

[@zech8098]

Wow this song is so nostalgic. I always appreciate the approach of the production. It gives late 2000/early 2010 music vibes, like Gym Class Heroes. This song resonates with me on another different level. I saw the truths about myself and the times I’m living in. My perception is that this song is a shared reality, something that many songs nowadays struggle to express. The song is about us, as us: us as our everyday selves beneath the indifferent masks that we adorn; us as our forgotten selves tethering above the riddles of societal norms; us as our unfulfilled selves stuck between a monochromatic world we can’t color and the world we want to stain with the hues we keep locked in our hearts. There are numerous occasions where I struggle to articulate my thoughts through virtual ink or expressing my thoughts in general. Nothing lasts forever. Without having a purpose, I'm unable to love and appreciate the simplest joys in my daily stupor. We can't help but reminisce a lot since it's one of the few ways we could encapsulate emotions. It's good to know that I'm not alone. I sincerely just want to say thank you Calli

[@8koi245]

yeah those times!

[@kev3914]

It also reminds me of Eminem. Like “Love the Way You Lie.”

[@zech8098]

@@tamgata9064 I do go outside. Have a part time job, went back to in-person college this fall, and still hangout with friends. I still feel lifeless and idk what to do since I can't find a purpose. Right now I'm just coping with it by finding new hobbies and trying out new things. But it can only last so long.

[@zech8098]

@@kev3914 I can see that, especially with the production! It reminds me of Fighter from Gym Class Heroes. Ah, I miss those years man. You rarely see songs produced like this anymore.

[@rawrxd5669]

I can relate

[@antaris905]

>Chasing fireflies between the soaring high-rises >Left a trail behind, defined it "wasted time of our lives" These two lines define adulthood in a nutshell and fucking hell my eyes get wet visualizing the imagery. Now Calli has the firefly in her hand, but there is barely anyone around her anymore, faded to the shadow underneath the concrete building. It's like watching your friends drown in a sinking ship from the window of an escape pod.

[@shiroukun7432]

This still might be her best work. It's so beautiful and somehow hits harder every time I listen

[@Bulldogg6404]

"Your friends grew tired of fantasy, you wish that they had stayed," followed by a series of lines about moving on and not missing the days gone... I don't know a whole lot about what Calli left behind by becoming a Vtuber, but I get the sense that she had friends in her musical past that didn't care for her decision to join Hololive, that they might have felt like she left them behind and they don't get along anymore. I might be misinterpreting, but it sounds like, "yeah, I miss them, and they did inspire me, but I traded my old path for this one, and my conscience is telling me it's better this way." "What is there to miss?" encapsulates that so strongly, cutting off the guilty feeling of dropping the people/memories who don't actually matter, in the "end of a made-up story".

[@ShinigamiX2]

I got the same vibe.

[@박태양-e4w]

@@ShinigamiX2 Me too..

[@henrycov]

I have a more bittersweet take on this. I take "your friends grew tired of fantasy" as her friends giving up on dreams of becoming a song writer and entering a more traditional style of life ("the sounds that diminished and decayed"/"you watched your heros fade"). I read it Calli feels guilt over the friends that inspired her to become a rapper giving up their dreams when she has become so successful. A sort of entertainer's survival guilt. That the new path isn't Vtubing, but that of a successful artist instead of a underground rapper messing around. At the same time she is criticizing herself for reminiscing and longing for those old times with those friends because she is successful ("you don't get to be emotional feel blessed you got it made").

[@cc9787]

She said in the Trash Taste episode that it was her friend who auditioned for Hololive, and Calli said why not and auditioned too..... She said that she felt bad that she was the one who got in instead and that she hopes the audition didnt break their friendship... So i guess this may be part of the reason But no worries, she said that she still hangs out with them and treats them to dinner lol

[@Ducilios]

I am deep enough on the hole to know that, that is very likely not the case, so be at ease.

[@OwnedSphinx]

I've been addicted to listening to this; it's the sort of song I've been wanting for a while now. One addressing the addicting allure of such a melancholic nostalgia. It's a feeling that I think about quite a lot. Although my current life is so much better than the one I've once lived, there is so much potential, the comfy memories of the past where I've struggled still claw their way into my conscience every so often. Other than that, lyrically this has to be one of my favorite song of Mori's! I've found it very fun to decipher my own meanings from these lyrics, for example: "I'll never find my way back to you inside this labyrinth of lights" holds a lot of weight to it. At first glance it means that her current life shines very bright and that it's impossible to return to the mindset of her past self, but another interpretation could be that the lights refer to her streaming job. And another fun little double meaning I've found is "When the ladder fell and shattered ever bar that we had played?", could be obtusely thought of as her having once sung at bars instead of being about musical bars. Now that one definitely doesn't make the most sense, but I find it fun to think about. Tldr: I love how dynamic these lyrics are.