My experience through psychosis, depression, schizophrenia , and more

This one is for you, Patricia. Follow me through the depths of school. Laugh with me through my despair.
Instagram: @mllysmth
Twitter: @mllysmth

[@lornatw]

Psychosis is so much more common than people think like even stress and anxiety or a sudden trauma or accident can cause you to have weird thoughts and fears that border or fully turn into psychotic features. And then of course drug use including medications can too. Thanks for sharing your story. Mh crisis is not always this major obvious event like in the movies ❤

[@mllysmth]

Yes most definitely! I completely agree. And no problem at all. There should be more talk about it so I’m glad to have been one of the few. ♥️

[@josephlerz6889]

@@mllysmth I was wrongly diagnosed with Schizophrenia a decade ago for being destructive & suicidal, then since taking drugs psychiatry has ruined my life, it gave me pre diabetes and then I had to also have a unfortunate cholecystectomy, tragically their convinced I'm lacking insight and their never going to take me off medications

[@mllysmth]

I’m so sorry. That’s terrible. I hope things will get better.

[@fatmayr12]

Wow, you are so strong. You can get through this, you are so brave! ❤

[@mllysmth]

Thank you so much! That means a lot ☺️

[@mahawataylor239]

Wow. I am so sorry, that happened to you. I hope you feel better and stay strong. You are an incredible person

[@mllysmth]

Thank you so much. It’s okay. I’m growing more and more and really putting it behind me as far as I can

[@gabyzephir9818]

First thought: is that a TØP shirt? And yesss it issss! Love that. That aside, I’m sorry you had to go through all this. Thanks for sharing your story. I’ve had many of the same delusions as you, but it’s my first time hearing about someone else who’s had pregnancy/miscarriage delusions, it drove me crazy. Anyway, glad you’re doing better, wishing you the best

[@mllysmth]

Yes it is! It’s my boyfriend’s hoodie. It’s okay. I’m still coping but I am doing a lot better. Yesss it drove me insane! Thank you so much. ☺️

[@maggiemay1855]

You are so brave, sunshine ☀️ ! I love you always ❤️!

[@mllysmth]

Thank you so much. I love you too ♥️

[@DianadeOliveira85]

Hearing about the girl in highschool brings a lot of similar memories to my head. Still hurts today. Wish u the best. Kiss from Portugal😊

[@mllysmth]

I completely get that. I’m so sorry. Hate to hear that other people have experienced even close to the same things as I have. I wish you the best as well. Thank you. ☺️

[@neaeanblue]

I have three too and can relate. I've found some solace in hobbies like: writing, reading, walking, and coloring.

[@mllysmth]

I love to read and write but unfortunately, I can’t really read at the moment unless I’m around someone because I’m so prone to seizures. I’m so glad you have such creative hobbies! ☺️

[@neaeanblue]

@@mllysmth Thanks! My attention span varies for the tasks. I really can relate to your video having been to acute care units a couple times. I had to leave behind my college studies as it was too much for me to handle later when I tried again. I was diagnosed in 2019 and had some other diagnosis in 2022. But when I had my mental breakdown first in the summer of 2017. Thank you for the video, I felt connected. Take care.

[@mllysmth]

@@neaeanblue I’m so glad and I completely understand about school! It’s so rough even trying to get back there. It makes me so happy that I have connected with you. That’s all I wanted to do. Help someone else. ☺️♥️

[@user-ky7rt4hp1h]

You have the right to stand up for yourself don't let people hurt you there cowards once you get mad and stand up they usually get scared

[@mllysmth]

Yes you are exactly right. I was just so young and shocked it even happened in the first place.

[@alialmasry3295]

Hello Molly, I am Ali from Egypt and I appreciate all that and I wish you a happy life, but I have a question, is shahan treated, and have you been treated for auditory hallucinations, or are they still present?

[@englihswithmusic7413]

Very good and you're beautiul

[@in-serenesanity4514]

Thank you for your video, Molly! Just wanted to say: since you talked about being manic sometimes and also that you have been diagnosed with depression, just wonder if your mental health professionals have ever considered Schizoaffective Disorder Bipolar or Depressive type? Basically, from what I know, such diagnoses as depression and schizophrenia are not usually put together, for such combination stands for another clinical entity - Schizoaffective Disorder... Best wishes for you on your healing journey!

[@mllysmth]

Thank you! And no I don’t think g they have considered that. I know I have major depressive disorder and anxiety but I haven’t heard Of schizoaffective disorder before. I do take medication for schizophrenia and depression but nothing for both at the same time. Thank you! ☺️

[@kimlec3592]

Psychosis is a human response to extreme distress. It is not an illness. Please see Dialogue Cures in Psychotic Problems with Jaakko Seikkula. Best of health to you, young, brave Lady.

[@mllysmth]

I’ll look into that. Thank you ☺️

[@joelmunoz8571]

😒 wow I hope you're doing better. You can literally write a book with you experience I hope nothing but the best for you

[@mllysmth]

Thank you so much. I am for the most part. Doing a lot better than I was in those experiences. ☺️

[@janeliu5237]

You’re brave! You look great! Thanks for sharing your high school experience… are you still taking clozapine? my nephew is taking Rexulti. Have you heard of that?

[@mllysmth]

Thank you so much! I try my best. And honestly, sharing that felt like a weigh off my chest because I’ve never talked much about it, since I was embarrassed, but I figured now was as good a time as any. Yes, I’m still taking clozapine. It’s my most important pill is giving that it’s an antipsychotic. I do take Effexor for major depressive disorder and it might have a little affect on anxiety too. I have heard about that on tv but I just looked up what it’s for. I hope that one is working for him. In high school, I was on lexapro and I found out too late that that pill literally wasn’t for me because if anything, it could’ve made things worse.

[@janeliu5237]

@@mllysmth actually Rexulti doesn’t completely fix his symptoms, he’s still showing paranoia or disordered thinking and intrusive thoughts. Maybe clozapine can make him think straight. How long have you been taking clozapine? People say they feel the difference immediately after using it, pretty amazing.

[@mllysmth]

I completely understand. Yeah I would ask your doctor about trying something else; whether it be clozapine or something else. I’ve been taking clozapine since 2019. The withdrawal symptoms when you don’t take it are pretty bad because it helps so much. I hope you can find the right medication for him.

[@janeliu5237]

@@mllysmth thanks Molly for your sharing. I appreciate! Does the delusional thinking or hallucinations still pop up once in a while when you’re taking clozapine?

[@mllysmth]

No problem at all. And no; I haven’t had them come back whilst taking the clozapine. It helps loads.

[@MiloTheMartian]

Same thing happened to me lol

[@mllysmth]

Oh wow. Life sure has sucked for both of us then.

[@johnmclawrence4676]

Sorry to hear what you are going through, you can add another therapist to your list his name is Jesus christ.

[@kimlec3592]

You were physically harmed??? My God. You have been through an ordeal with no one to help. You were assaulted !!!

[@mllysmth]

Yes it definitely sucks but I’m growing from that time every day. It’s hard to get over but I’m working through it. ♥️

[@alialmasry3295]

Hello Molly, I am Ali from Egypt and I appreciate all that and I wish you a happy life, but I have a question, is shahan treated, and have you been treated for auditory hallucinations, or are they still present?

[@mllysmth]

Thank you and I do not have hallucinations anymore.