My Gay Mormon Story

[@lawrenzzz]

You reading that letter to yourself SO reminds me of the way I feel when I read my mission journal. I was pretty crazy back then. I think this is very brave of you to share. Thanks for telling your story-- this is the kind of thing that people need to hear about. You are a wonderful young man!

[@brent1048]

Thank you for being so strong in putting yourself out there and being true to yourself. There are so many kids that are struggling with finding a sense of self and the dignity that comes with that. Thank you for being a positive role model for all the other young gay kids that will come out after your example. Stay strong and be that voice that educates others.

[@greenwood1987]

You are such a strong person, I really admire and I really look up to you for your strength. You'll find out who you are, that is all that growing up is about! Just be yourself! You have really inspired me.

[@stayfamily]

Wow, how incredibly courageous of YOU!! I applaud you! Thanks for posting.

[@kimopuppy]

What a great story! Each human has a different lessons to learn and you have made a major milestone in yours!

[@kingsquiddish]

thanks for sharing your story... more people should do this for those people out there who know they are gay but are so scared to accept themselves. i hope things are going well for you in life... be strong.

[@rdberg1957]

You are very brave and totally lovable. And your nose is very nice, too! It is very diffiucult to choose to be who you are in the face of opposition. The story you have told moves me greatly.

[@alexsoterios]

oh gosh thanks for this video, I'm brazilian and member of the church and gay...and I'm really tryng so hard too, I'm keeping going to the church, but sometimes I feel so sad and alone, but knowing that you are living the same situation, make me feel less alone, thanks for share this with us.

[@asifwekere]

That is an amazing story. Please just be yourself, always, true friends will accept and love you completely. This is a great message for the young adults who cannot find their identity and are struggle(ling) for acceptance.. "Good Job" Live 4 Love!

[@titto14007]

you know that had TO BE TUF. but I your Relived now. I am also in the mormon church and gay no one really knows just a friend at school but he lives miles away from me. I had thoughts of going up and tekking my story to at sacrament but the I fell as if I would BE hated. thank you alot ! you coming out means alot to many people. be proud be happy and love livin

[@kf1000]

What a very cool video and what a great guy through and through. You'll do just fine in life - I'm excited for you. Stay flexible and stay un-angry about those who disagree with your life.

[@Michaelneiss]

Thank you for an inspiring video, which - no doubt - will help others to love and accept themselves… You are the best! Be proud and remain faithful to yourself and your own beliefs. Many greetings from Stockholm/Sweden

[@guyinabigworld]

So first of all I have to tell you that your testimony meeting story has inspired me on a level that I cannot express in words. I live in Utah and grew up Mormon. I had that little conversation with my bishop 5 years ago, and have lived with my partner for close to 4. Lately I have been longing for a relationship with my heavenly father again. That doesn't mean I would ever not be who I am now, I would just like something more. I would love to talk to you sometime.

[@WhyYesIDoLikePi]

Wow I'm sorry this is so hard for you... I am not religious, but I have quite a few LDS friends... And most of my other friends are strongly religious, and I am used to them cautiously skirting the topic of my relatives who are gay. I hate it. I personally am not gay or anything, but it hurts to see such smart people so obviously unable to approach a certain subject. I'm glad you've found a way to be who you believe yourself to be. I'm really proud, and glad you were able to do that.

[@rhettlowman]

hey man thank you for posting, i myself am an active mormon living in utah, and in no way do i judge you. I know that you can be a great example to the youth of this church. please remain active. i know for me, if i didnt have this truth..... well... i dont know where i would be :)

[@titto14007]

HEY! Im so glad I found your video again! ha Im sooo lost in my church... Im sure you dont remember, but I was one of the top ten? people to comment.. you helped me a few years ago.. if you can please please please message me!

[@xenuburger]

I really admire you for your courage and honesty. Live your own life and be yourself.

[@21lifeflux]

1st comment!! woot! anyway, we are a rare bread you and me. I am glad that you are staying strong.

[@Arirang1989]

Thank you for your testimony. You are experiencing what millions of us Christians, not necessarily Mormon, but believers in the Lord Jesus have faced in our own ways as we grew up in congregations that don't understand and who think that we have chosen this as a way of life. How we have attempted to deny something that we have no control over and prayed God would take away these thoughts and desires! It is when we come to realize that we don't love the Lord less than others that we find peace.

[@sproutky]

Hey! I stopped going to the Mormon Church when I was around 15, not long after I admitted to myself that I was gay. I always knew I was, but I tried to deny it. Know that God loves you and He doesn't make mistakes. You are who you are and exactly who God wants you to be and I'm really happy that you were able to come out in church, something I couldn't do way back when. Love God, HE is the church, a building is just a building.

[@Wishawq]

I cried. I cried because I'm in the exact same situation. I'm 17, I live in Orem, UT. Female. Been here most of my life. I recently joined the Army, and it has been my eye opener to the real world and my independent possibilities. I had been considering to find my path with girls or the church for years. At the time I was so sure I could fall for a guy and it'd be okay, but everytime I'd see myself react to a girl. I'd change my mind again and be like hell no, I love girls.

[@cshuc679]

I give you so much credit for being yourself. Never let anyone discourage you. Hold your beliefs dear to your heart and let those beliefs guide you. GOD Bless.

[@drgctube]

You´re just... beautiful. I already felt and passed by everything same as you. I thank god for my true friends... straights or not... and I hope you´ll find great friends as me. I´m really glad for your... thanks for sharing.

[@BryanLawlor]

Wow you're very brave to come out in sacrament meeting like that. I've fantasized about doing that, but if I ever did it would unfortunately be out of spite and resentment. So I won't. It was great hearing your story. I had a hard time coming out as a member of the LDS church; I didn't truly come out until I was almost 23. I have no regrets and feel that I am doing nothing wrong. I am living the best life I can live and being the best person I can be. That's all you can do.

[@udothegreat]

Hey, you are a freaking awesome guy! I don't think you were "messed up" at all. I'm a gay Mormon, and I had the same type of spiritual outlook on life back in highschool and junior high. I am impressed with your courage to come out in sacrament meeting, and then to continue going! That is a level of strength I have seen in verrrry few people. If you haven't, check out Matthew 22:36-40 You sound like a true disciple of Christ to me! :)

[@Stephenrsm7600]

Blake, very happy to see your video. God is my Heavenly Father as he is yours. Yes, the Church has changed some in the past 5 years since you made this video. So proud of you for making this video!!!! Do not listen or pay attention to the haters!!!!! There will always be haters!! They were there in Jesus' time, and they are still here now.

[@79luke]

I have SO much respect for you! well done!!!!!!!!!!!

[@246Alexandrea]

hey:) I really do admire you brother,.. I call you brother because you really was my brother up there. It is a tough choice to come up in the open of what you really feel but I believed that you are a strong spirit all you have to do is to conquer the call of the flesh for you to finally be free....hold on until you can find the strength to get loose from it. I know it might be kinda hard cause you're just very young but I know eventually you will...

[@candimonium2327]

I wish there were some way for me to express exactly how I feel... I was abandoned by my Mormon family when I was 15 for having a lesbian relationship. 7years later, my entire family still is disgusted by me and my testimony is gone. Before my family found out, I would sit in Testimony Meeting and wish I had the gut to do exactly what you did. You're an amazing person, Blake. Watch this movie: "In the Shadow of the Temple". It's about exmormons and their struggles. Thank you so much for posting.

[@TNoyes07]

Thanks for posting this ! :)

[@tillerGeneric]

Hey man just want to pop in and give you some encouragement. I'm an ex-LDS Member (born and raised LDS) but straight. I've had a good number of gay friends in my life so even though I may not have experienced what you're going through, I empathize with you. Good luck and I hope you can find peace.

[@irock20012001]

yes. after making a big long speach about them not pointing out the spec in my eye when there is a log in their eye.

[@JacquiCuff]

I'm Mormon, I believe in you and u feel in the bottom of my heart things will change. Perhaps one on one time is the best policy for now :-)

[@AndreBettinson]

You have lots of courage man. Something most of the sheeple followers don't have. I've lived in Utah all my life. I'm not a homosexual, but I do think you have lots of courage to show such judgemental people who you really are. Props.

[@udothegreat]

Aaa, That took A LOT of guts to come out in fast and testimony meeting!

[@lSomthingToDol]

lmao i found that reali intresting only cos the fact when i was small i wrote some stuff drew some pictures still got them 8 years later lol im 17 now an i still have the drawings i look at them everyday an it makes me smile =)

[@sherjax2]

You are a beautiful person! God loves all his children and it's hard being part of a religion where people aren't supposed to judge and obviously they do. I think you're awesome for being brave enough to come out so "loudly" and help others who might be needing your words of wisdom. Find God on your own terms, not terms that a church gives you. He speaks louder when not confined by man made ideals.

[@tristangladston4466]

You are a brave young man. To "come out" at the pulpit. So many people say such inane mindless things and leaders hardly miss a beat yet it is a big deal to tell your ward family who you are.

[@Phaatsoh]

From one Gay Mormon brother to another,You are truly beautiful and an amazing person,It takes a lot of courage to witness and testify the way you do, in fact like all Ex Gay Mormons on this site.Much love,God speed and remember you are not alone,Our Savior lead the way for all people who were not of the norm according to circular society, Like him Gays carry the responsibility of Persecution. I think it is the only way some people in society and the world can be educated(Myopic as it sounds)

[@vintageyellow71]

Hey Chief, I liked your video. You're a cool guy. Try to get into the church building more then once a month. I know some members are a bit uncomfortable at times i how to deal with the subject, look at it from their perspective and their inadequacies. Don't let them offend you. In time members will be more able to get past the issue. Of course we know the actions are wrong but it's not wrong to share and help others get over their prejudices. Keep the faith man.

[@JephProductions]

Your story is like looking into a mirror of my own life. I am gay and mormon as well, it was so hard to hear what I believed in was against what I was. I know you're probably over it. but really if you need to talk, just contact me.

[@RLMpoo9489]

you are great dont let anyone hold you down

[@landfish7a]

Blake, you should make a reaction to this video, you can reflect on how things have changed over the past 5 years.

[@Wishawq]

When I was telling the bishop of my choice to embrace everything I had been feeling. (cause I love this me a lot better)I expressed that I was angry that I could not talk about it; that it was considered such an adult topic. He said something to the extent "you don't hear me going around telling people that I like sex with my wife. It's just a private matter and inappropriate." I've searched this topic a thousand times looking at gay mormonism. 90% of the time it's you're in or you're out.

[@fortuneson1980]

Don't be afraid to doubt the very basics of religious ideas, theories, rules and so on. Life and reality are not in debt before people. They are not supposed to be logical. Absense of meaning is not the end. That's how human kind started. And we are always in that same spot, but we just like to fool ourselves when we say that we know. I believe that true psychological comfort is in accepting reality, not in accepting ideas about it. That was about 'out of church' experience.

[@Hawksearcher]

@Svperstarr *ahem* please remember that that is just your opinion about our church.

[@allzago]

I can see how tormented you must feel...I had a similar battle. Remember, some may be predisposed to behave violently, to alcoholism, or to homosexuality, but a predisposition does not make it right. I only saw this one video of yours, so I admit I really don't know you...but all I can say is follow the commandments where there is safety and peace (yes, it is the path of PEACE for guys like you and me).

[@menuria]

You are so so so adorable!

[@greenparty720]

i enjoyed your story

[@grahmhw]

Man, I have been a gay mormon for 43 years - the church needs you more than you need them - just love man - you are special - the church is not special

[@Raffanroll]

Thanks for making your vidio. You have a really cute smile dude!!! god bess.

[@angellgirl1]

You are very brave. I see the pain in your eyes and feel it. Know that God does love you and he knows the challenges that you face. Not all of our natural desires are in harmony with God's will for us. As an alcoholic I have had to choose between what I am naturally Through prayer I realized that during the resurrection those "natural" desires will no longer be in my life as I will live in a perfected body. It is up to me how I wanted to spend my time in mortality. Sober 1 year 10 months

[@jmason86]

Congratulations, it sounds like you've set yourself free. :-)

[@Instinct245]

A useful story :)

[@Wishawq]

Now it's a fight for my parents to not be so disappointed that I chose differently. I was not willing to sacrifice my desires for the sake of the church or God. That in reality I really can't see myself being Molly Mormon and actually having a happy little family that's just PERFECT. XD I see myself becoming someone rather different, and I'm really okay with that. I tend to hate how a lot of people see homosexuality as only lust... it's never real love to them. It's all the same on both sides.

[@THELDSLIFE]

It probably would be difficult. It is important to acknowledge where you are at or at least where one "thinks they are at." Not knowing where one is on this map is a difficult way to traverse this world. I do not make labels. I do not call people after the manner of their conditional activity; ie, someone with a temptation to drink is not a "Drunk" and in like manner, someone with a "same-sex" attraction, in my mind, is not Gay. There still must be some conflict. Satan is good at creating it.

[@marcelrj]

The correct is my gay "expelled" mormon story !

[@thuggie1]

did it feel strange when you read the letter?

[@thuggie1]

poeple in church still don't know about me been gay

[@BramuSing]

A good, honest story. Live your life, live your dream. God will help you anyhow. He isn't a god of punishment, but a god of love. Wish you all the best from holland.

[@Phaatsoh]

I believe the most complimentary thing to happen for Heavenly Father is, that his creations find love with each other, Female to Male, Male to Male, Female to Female and the Transgendered Community, Consensual of course, That is how I would feel if I made perfect creations like Father in Heaven does.

[@expresateoficial]

i am the same but nobody else knows it, i would like to get to know you.....

[@ritaliko]

i wish you were straight cuz you're really attractive. don't let what people think of you keep you from moving on in your spiritual development.

[@Stephenrsm7600]

Well said Tristan!!!!

[@tallrob11]

a universal story my friend...i grew up as a gay mormon too...lol now im just gay...lol...and much better off not in the mormon church!! lol good luck man!

[@darkneon85]

he has really sharp k-9 teeth. its cool

[@docdespair]

You can be proud of yourself!

[@thuggie1]

looking back is always strange in india they say that is why God put eyes on the front so you always look forword its a good saying

[@aam9698]

thanks for sharing.

[@jmu2k5]

Mormans equals candy bars

[@Jacktibby2011]

@TheBigDaddyCake yes sir god loves all of his children but people dont seem to understand that

[@kuabci]

Most revealing moment of this video: 9:20, "I don't even know who myself is." That is for sure. Thanks for your honesty, but the Church is not going to change its position on this, because it's not the Church's position--it's God's. You can take it up with Him if you like. And if you wanted to, you COULD change. People do all the time. But only if you wanted to.

[@snoutout]

@Svperstarr thank you! God is all about change. the universe is always expanding and us humans are always changing. if we aren't then we're probably not living our potential.

[@millenniumicon]

I do give you due credit for being courageous, no argument there, yet, can you imagine what it would have been like if you were black, or say asian, in addition to being gay? (apparently, we our spirits missed voting in your belief system) . Lastly, have you ever considered the possibility that maybe there's no god?

[@drgctube]

you´re great

[@irock20012001]

u think u had it bad, i came out to my grandma who told my pastor. who then asked me not attend that church.

[@Hitachi007]

LDS stands for Latter Day Saints-- also known as Mormons (because they also read the Book of Mormon). Mormons call themselves this because they believe that these are the "latter days" and that the Second Coming of Christ is not too far off.

[@kittywaymo]

awwe.. you're cuteLOL can we adopt ya?

[@LeoBurns728]

he has a nice smile, may his teeth last his entire lifetime...

[@Hawksearcher]

Still though, although I don't really support homosexuality, people who are homosexual should NOT be discriminated. They are people too and deserve a voice!

[@bhoffman87]

Youre a strong man

[@drgctube]

sorry for my bad english...

[@Hawksearcher]

Alas, we must all believe in different things and follow different faiths, otherwise Earth would not be the test that God intended for us.

[@tallrob11]

lol...i was raised Mormon too and am also gay... crazy isn't it????? lol good luck!!

[@gabadobe]

hi blake - oh sorry - I deleted my post - but seriously don't you see the similarity......?

[@StephenM02]

This kid is cool.

[@fordlandau]

Hey your nose is fine and the rest of you is very good looking too..Please don't think you are wrong or abnormal. There are millions of gay men and women in the world. For all of them there are issues about being different. If your Church can't accept the fact you have differences to some of them, then the Church is out of step with you. I hope you realise the primary thing being a Christian is to have your own honest belief and relationship and with God and Christ wherever they are! Simon

[@hisapprentice]

I would remove your records before they do it for you. I live in Utah and when I was 19 I had my records removed and my Bishop begged me not to do it. He worked at the church office building with the quorum of the twelve and discussed it with them and they also wrote me a note begging me not to do. I've been out of the church for two years and couldn't feel more free... even though I do live openly gay in Salt Lake City. This VID was in '08 so I don't know wht u've done since. Nomoreroomtowrite.

[@jmu2k5]

Josef Smith Defrauded the whole state of Utah!

[@jmu2k5]

God Loves Everyone but who is Josef Smith to add more additions to the old and new testaments what a fool! he was on LCD

[@ToushiKatou00]

Stay strong man. Please don't fall into the fallacies of the world. It's alright to be gay, even though, many do condemn it. It is just one challenge that God has placed before you. I am a mormon, and I do accept Gay's as real people. In fact many are my friends. Don't let the world disuade you from the church though. Even though you're Bishop said that, he is still human after all. Everyone makes mistakes.

[@hisapprentice]

I would remove your records before they do it for you. I live in Utah and when I was 19 I had my records removed and my Bishop begged me not to do it. He worked at the church office building with the quorum of the twelve and discussed it with them and they also wrote me a note begging me not to do. I've been out of the church for two years and couldn't feel more free... even though I do live openly gay in Salt Lake City. Thiswas from '08 soIdon't knowwhat U've done since. Nomoreroomtowrite.

[@Hitachi007]

That's terrible, I'm sorry your pastor and own flesh and blood did that! My grandmother is similar. :(

[@LBloggie]

that line is so old

[@WilliamZeebub]

God is not your father, your dad is your father, your mum is your mother.... GOD IS LOVE..,,,,the emotion of love... whether it be a man and woman, or gay... Love is all you need..,. forget religion...IMAGINE

[@heiswithus36]

He is more than just "up there." He is with us - Emmanuel. All those who claim to be sinners, seeking, knocking... they will find the door to heaven opened, and not because they have first proven "worthy," but because of His FREE gift of love. Jesus is the door, the way, and all He wants from us is our love in return. We should be seeking out ways to show Him our love is true. BTW, John the Baptist was the last Prophet with a capital P...since Jesus was the male, unblemished lamb.

[@ZEEMACHINEMUSIC]

Who was this comment to?

[@MzJMB]

@Charlie91692 Shouldnt Jesus be the brightest light in your life and not the church??

[@marujazzz]

you'll hear a lot of stuff about homosexuality being a sin, but just ignore. People we'll be against you, Don't worry, you are young and you have a lot to experience yet. You know it is right, God knows it's right (even if i don't really believe in him) but the point is that you are strong enough to believe in yourself and just live your life following your ideas.

[@Wanderingacrossoceans]

But insaying that, I dont think it would be right for you to marry a female in the temple as it just wouldnt be fair on them, I know a few guys who have done so and have had children and then years down the track decide they just cant handle it anymore and leave them, it happened to a couple in my ward. So frustrating, I do feel for you and I hope for the best.