My Inner Child | What I Learned

In honor of World Mental Health Day, MedCircle host Kyle Kittleson shares what he learned about his inner child during our "Inner Child" workshop with neuropsychologist Dr. Judy Ho.
Discover how past trauma can subconsciously drive present-day behavior, emotions and thoughts.
00:00 Understanding the inner child
03:35 How our inner child is "formed"
07:13 How the inner child impacts our subconscious mind
09:09 What advice would you give a younger version of yourself?
16:24 Dr. Judy Ho's "Healing Your Inner Child" workshop
#trauma #innerchild #healing #psychology #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthmatters #medcircle

[@MedCircle]

Get live access to our MedCircle Doctors HERE: *bit.ly/3Uh9NBT*

[@rorinja]

You might want to consider adding captions / using a platform that includes captions. It would be more inclusive to people with hearing issues, as well as people like me with ADHD (it helps to read along to process it).

[@user-er8fu8jg3p]

I have been living with a narcissist who was a cheat and was planning on leaving me all the while and i never knew, At first the journey was smooth but it later was hell. He doesn’t eat at home only on few occasions. I felt powerless with him, no gut for me to leave because he made me dependant financially, he wouldn’t let me work. just on this platform i saw an ad about a software expert who can clone partners phones without notice,I doubted the process at first but then my best friend and cousin encouraged me to try it and see, off course I was scammed but then it didn’t matter because it wasn’t alot just a little. I didn’t stop there i wanted closure so i kept searching. My best friend then met another who came highly recommended, i was scared but anyways I decided to try again and God so kind he turned out legit. He helped me get all the closure I needed i was able to see all text conversations, social media, and mails in my husband’s from my husbands phone, we both saw the illicitness in his endeavors, I gathered the proofs and I confronted him but he was defensive and physically abused me. I have sign for a divorce already because I’ve got proofs adding to the fact that he physically abused me. Narcissist don’t deserve some of us. You can just contact him if you have similar issue 👉 chart me on WhatsApp ‪[phone]‑6132

[@mohamedismaini7503]

Zine bonne nuit en bb petit déjeuner à casa pour s'asseoir à la maison fait que vous envoyer la salle gratos la soirée avec la salle gratos de vous

[@mohamedismaini7503]

Salut Sarah j'attends

[@pattiekx]

Hello, does the link work anymore? Thank you.

[@PoshASMR]

I’ve known I needed therapy for years but really can’t afford it so for you guys to provide this free workshop is so helpful for those unable to get help for financial reasons.

[@LLyALySTFyMLL]

Goodluck to you (and anyone else here) on your journey through healing and growing into your best self.

[@sunflower260285]

Where is the free workshop?

[@risika]

I was listening to a podcast that said, “it’s important to live life by design rather than emotion. Basically, sticking to a routine is what allows us to be the healthiest version of ourselves (especially when you're fighting these demons ex. OCD for me). I’ve had to overhaul how I approach taking care of my brain (exercise, journaling, studying etc) by practising mediocre consistency. Now I try to put in consistent 50-60% effort into my journaling habit - to make sure I do it I began recording it and posting it on YT. After a really bad depression phase I started to believe I couldn’t change and I’d feel that horrible forever. Historically I have a habit of going too hard, not being able to sustain the Herculean effort, giving up and hating myself. So now I’m trying to give a small, consistent mediocre effort everyday. And its crazy how it adds up.

[@okieinthemix]

Are these on your channel?

[@4CAND1]

Nah man it’s crazy you’re posting this because I LITERALLY had just realized some patterns I had developed due to my developing years… I connected everything. I’ve been going through a bad break up with a narc and I was diving into why he is how he is as well…and why I chose to be with someone like him. It’s crazy how we grow with this inner child inside of us. I have certain behaviors right… so if I go back and look at what was going on around me growing up and how I am the way I am now… it makes a lot of sense. It helps me correct and explain these behaviors. If I have a child I know I’m going to be making sure they know they can talk to me about anything and that I’m going to make sure we have a secure healthy attachment. I have unhealthy attachment styles developed due to my mom neglecting me emotionally and my dad as well. I felt like I was responsible for my moms mood swings and that I had to stay silent as to not upset her. My dad never really showed me love or affection. He was an alcoholic and he was abusive. He was also irresponsible and never took the blame or accepted consequences. My ex narc was like that. Alcoholic. Drug addict. Never took the blame. Wasn’t very affectionate. I had to walk on egg shells around him. Not talk too much. Make him feel good but also give him his space… It’s kinda sad we aren’t taught this in school. It would help a lot of people if we could teach kids how to spot unhealthy relationships or habits or responses. Kids are smart but are told they aren’t because adults don’t like being judged and corrected by kids. So kids begin to normalize and adapt to certain conditions… I always wanted someone more outgoing around me because I used to wanna go out and play and have fun but my mom didn’t let me… So now I guess I internally don’t go out much anymore because I wasn’t allowed to. Like I need someone to get me out or I can’t go. Weird stuff.

[@ebbyc1817]

" If I have a child I know I’m going to be making sure they know they can talk to me about anything and that I’m going to make sure we have a secure healthy attachment." Do the best you can, when you have a child, but don't expect to be perfect. Even securely attached people can have issues with being available for their children. Trying to be perfect may also breed insecure attachment. It will teach your child that he or she has to be perfect, perfectly open, perfectly attached, in order to be worthy and have value as a person. They will develop a persona that pleases you, because "mummy wants us to be securely attached".. Children pick up on these things, even though they may not have the words for it. Just like we picked up on it from our parents. It's not your fault, that your parents did or didn't do what they did or didn't do. It's not your fault, that you ended up with your ex-bf. He picked you too,. You don't have to be perfect, to reverse what was done to you as a child. It wasn't your fault. Do the best you can. It will be enough. You don't have to be superhuman, and overcome aLL of your issues, and be someone who grew up with a completely different background. You didn't. You grew up the way you grew up. And it's ok. You're ok. You're ok, just as you are.

[@JamieR]

It is kinda funny how these things come to our awareness at the right time. And I'm certain your story resonates with so many, as this seem to be such a wide spread issue these days. We're all traumatized, and nobody gets told how to heal themselves at the core. Instead they go 15+ years to psychotherapy, which is great, but it only gives insight. It doesn't actually heal. I've been searching exactly like you for the root cause, but it was necessary to go through the narcissistic, manipulative and abusive partner to realize... oh shit. This isn't just the partner. This goes all the way back to the family and how they treated us. The environment we grew up in and how life affected us. Only to realize that all of the above stems from inner child trauma, the epicenter of all this pain. Which is amazing. Now we can do something about it :) I started reading John Bradshaw's book 'Homecoming' and it's got exercises laid out for every stage of developmental years. Gradually work through from toddler to young adult. It's apparently really good and he has a lot of experience in helping individuals with this, as he too went through the healing process. To wrap it up - I hope you, along with everyone else on this healing journey will find a way through and into a better life. Be well.

[@queendom774]

Wow, you said a lot and it all makes sense

[@infinitybless7132]

What I want to say is you are special, you are worthy, you are loved. 🙏💋

[@3boysmom155]

First thing that comes to me is “ you are loved no matter what, you are worthy of love! I’m proud of you, you are good enough”

[@lavenderpurp6610]

I get teary eye immediately when u said about the exercise about writing a letter to your old self, a lot of flashback memories 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

[@89dirtybird]

"Things aren't as hard as they seem" a wonderful thing I've become. I'd prefer where I am now even know good isn't the word I'd use. The value of being happy inside couldn't be traded for all my memories. Horid and happy. I find things of this nature to be of great value to me. Being dixlexic and infj gives me a unique perspective of our world.

[@karendelbuono6985]

I just finished an emdr session and this came up in my feed. Yes, the work needs to be done as much as you don’t want to. 63 years old and doing the work now. I often wonder what people that don’t deal with depression or anxiety think about during the day, cuz we know what we think 24/7 😢

[@theliftexpert]

A message to my younger self, Look after yourself and your needs and wants,while you’re on this journey! You are in charge of you , not your father, not your partner, not your boss . Always remember,you are in charge of you…… Stay safe,happy,healthy and productive and enjoy your journey, Cheers 🍻

[@adilahaz]

Revisiting my wounded inner child makes me realize I need to update the old schema of reacting and choosing the updated schema based on my adult wisdom. It's hard work but I take it as a journey of maturity

[@cindybarnes777]

Good afternoon ... thank goodness for MedCircle & national mental health day 😳 My Papa died on 10.7.22 ... he was more of a Dad than my real father who died 11.11.16 ... there is so much trauma in my entire life to date ... most of my family members completely disrespect me & disregard my feeling (eg Aww poor Cindy's feeling blah blah blah some sad story) ... I am the ONLY person who has gone through therapy in my family besides my mom who went a couple of times ... my family is riddled with narcissists who gaslight, manipulate, torment, verbally & emotionally abuse me .... dear God! Please help me because I feel so angry at the Universe right now !!!

[@vksomji]

What you have stating is True. I believe you.

[@mariee.5912]

I hope you're feeling better, grief takes time. It's like healing from a cut, but emotionally.

[@mikevallente2735]

You’re an amazing person. Thanx for all the info, tips, teachings. Hope to see you in person. God bless and take care always. ❤

[@MindfullyMindy]

Where are the other workshops he said would be listed? This guy is great. I really appreciate all the Med Circle ⭕️ people.

[@Lola-mt1ne]

I've done a lot of inner child work and this reminded me to look at my 12 yr-old self. Thank you.

[@steevrush]

My inner child wants to come out & play! :D

[@vksomji]

Hello Medcircle, Happy World Mental Health Day. On Lighter 🎶 I am Mental. I am feeling Proud of Myself that I Accepted it 🙂....I am Glad that I came across Medcircle Channel. So Thankyou Medcircle for Educating me on Mental Health Care. I am going through the 5 Phases of Mental Disorders. 1. Early Phase 2. Being Overwhelmed 3. The Struggle to Cope Mental Disorders 4. Living with the Experience 5. Living Past the Experience I learnt my Life Time Lesson. So far within 10 yrs since 2012 I have gone through the Early Phase , the Overwhelmed Phase, the Struggle to Cope with Mental Disorders, Now I have accepted it so Kind of Struggling to Live with the Mental Disorders....I need to be patient with the 3rd, 4th and 5th Phase of my Mental Disorders after I got Diagonosed with Mental Disorders. Yes Sir, I had to Relook and Review my Entire Treatment of my Mental Disorders right from Phase 1 to Phase 3 that is Early Phase to Struggle Phase after the Pandemic 19 and after I was Chucked out of my Employment in 2020 because of Non Performance at Work Place arising from the Work Disability attached to Mental Disorders. So after Revisiting, Reviewing my Mental Health Condition after the Pandemic 19, it's like I came out of Phase 1 the Early Phase of my Mental Disorders successfully after I got Diagonosed with and Treated through Allopathy, Ayurvedic, Homeopathy. After that I Stepped out of Phase 2 the Overwhelmed Phase of my Mental Disorders Unsuccessfully and Had to be in the Phase 3 , My Struggle with Unexplained PTSD for almost 9 yrs, it's a Long Way almost like Baby 🐥 🍼 Steps in Phase 3 after I got myself Educated Online about my Core Mental Disorders from the Professionals in Mental Health. I have become a Practical Pessimist, trying to keep away Negativity, I believe in the Gravitational Pull of Earth after Experiencing the 1 to 3 Phases so far of my Mental Disorders. Now, I want to Live a Normal Happy and Healthy Life the way I used to be before I was Diagnosed with Mental Disorders. Thanks for Educational Channel about Mental Health. I believe in Practicing a "Pinch" of Self Hypnosis along with Medication for Nutritional Deficiency to SNAP OUT 💫✨👌ADHD and other Mental Disorders. Bye and Take Care. Commented at 14:25 hrs ⏳ of this Day, Tuesday 11th of October 2022.

[@emma-janeminshull-turner1242]

I would ask me at 8 yrs : How do you feel being given away as a baby, and adopted by a wonderful family (I was told when I was 8) ; in a very gentle and nurturing way! 🤗🤔

[@keithstewart7514]

I fantasized about being adopted by a loving family. God spoke to me at five years old. HE said yes my sibling & father will always hurt me, then HE added MOTHER can not be trusted... 53 years later He showed mom try to hide her joy by not ever being able to see me as my siblings EQUAL. No contact is getting easier without texting her about her evil tendencies being over.

[@mindfulnesswithmatt]

Our inner childs can be stubborn and persist those behaviors even through years of work, very helpful reminder

[@m.l.sokolauthoradvocatepub8699]

I really appreciate how much Med Circle really showcases and teaches; and I can only imagine how much the host has learned during this process! Thanks for this content and educating the public!

[@aaronsavvy2908]

Is it me or is Kyle getting younger with each video? :D

[@theliftexpert]

He’s getting healthier…..❤

[@hotpotato4023]

@@theliftexpert came here to say just that!

[@theblankspace00]

It’s the healthy glow for me! ❤ great video!

[@user-er8fu8jg3p]

I have been living with a narcissist who was a cheat and was planning on leaving me all the while and i never knew, At first the journey was smooth but it later was hell. He doesn’t eat at home only on few occasions. I felt powerless with him, no gut for me to leave because he made me dependant financially, he wouldn’t let me work. just on this platform i saw an ad about a software expert who can clone partners phones without notice,I doubted the process at first but then my best friend and cousin encouraged me to try it and see, off course I was scammed but then it didn’t matter because it wasn’t alot just a little. I didn’t stop there i wanted closure so i kept searching. My best friend then met another who came highly recommended, i was scared but anyways I decided to try again and God so kind he turned out legit. He helped me get all the closure I needed i was able to see all text conversations, social media, and mails in my husband’s from my husbands phone, we both saw the illicitness in his endeavors, I gathered the proofs and I confronted him but he was defensive and physically abused me. I have sign for a divorce already because I’ve got proofs adding to the fact that he physically abused me. Narcissist don’t deserve some of us. You can just contact him if you have similar issue 👉 chart me on WhatsApp ‪[phone]‑6132

[@redheadedblessed5888]

It's the topic Inner child that suggests mentally to your subconscious, his younger appearance. Lol.

[@dnk4559]

Thank you so much!

[@nou-kc1ws]

I love this Kylie!

[@franfleck]

I just want to say THANK YOU Kyle

[@infinitybless7132]

It’s so true, repeating the behaviors over and over again that are causing us so much pain. 🙏💋

[@mmohseni69]

Thank you so much for your words of encouragement 🙏

[@auroraleielsalama261]

You are amazing and I enjoyed this video. I didn't even know anything about innerchild but of late I've just been having desires to play as a child, a sense of freedom & having dreams in which I was breastfeeding a younger me. I just knew I needed to revisit my past but did not know how. This video has really helped me understand the concept of inner child & partly how to go about it, thank you.

[@miriamminkoff]

Thank you. Much appreciated.❤

[@ruthnamaste]

I love and appreciate you raw honesty! Many Blessings to you 🙏🏼 Keep up the great work! "You God This"...

[@andreabiro2357]

Thank you so much! I have learned a lot about myself from the exercises. Great help!

[@azzahanafi1392]

Amazing ...thanks Kyle

[@evan541]

I would love to see some more videos about schizotypal! I know that you’ve previously done a video or two on it, but it’s definitely the least talked about on this channel. It can be hard to find solid information about schizotypal on the internet, so I think that another video on schizotypal would be helpful for people who were either diagnosed or living with someone who is schizotypal.

[@user-er8fu8jg3p]

I have been living with a narcissist who was a cheat and was planning on leaving me all the while and i never knew, At first the journey was smooth but it later was hell. He doesn’t eat at home only on few occasions. I felt powerless with him, no gut for me to leave because he made me dependant financially, he wouldn’t let me work. just on this platform i saw an ad about a software expert who can clone partners phones without notice,I doubted the process at first but then my best friend and cousin encouraged me to try it and see, off course I was scammed but then it didn’t matter because it wasn’t alot just a little. I didn’t stop there i wanted closure so i kept searching. My best friend then met another who came highly recommended, i was scared but anyways I decided to try again and God so kind he turned out legit. He helped me get all the closure I needed i was able to see all text conversations, social media, and mails in my husband’s from my husbands phone, we both saw the illicitness in his endeavors, I gathered the proofs and I confronted him but he was defensive and physically abused me. I have sign for a divorce already because I’ve got proofs adding to the fact that he physically abused me. Narcissist don’t deserve some of us. You can just contact him if you have similar issue 👉 chart me on WhatsApp ‪[phone]‑6132

[@theempress111tarot]

Whenever I try getting into inner child work, all by myself..... It gets too dark... I get confused.... I have been diagnosed with BPD back then in 2014 and currently I am suffering from depression (cronic one)... BPD makes you blame others and yourself irrationally... Therefore, the whole experience of inner child work gets so intense for me.... But I will keep trying... Thankyou for the workshop ❤️

[@jackparrow2954]

Thank you happy 🌎 mental health day

[@angelalex125]

Sometimes healing from something makes you look younger

[@jcintx5798]

This video said the Inner Child Workshop would be free, but when I located it the price was $50 for one-off purchase or $19.99/mo for all-access membership. Is the workshop free? If so, please put the link to watch it free here in the description or comments. Thanks!

[@naturalinstinct4950]

"Strength is gained through pain and sacrifices" thats what I'd tell my younger self

[@kelleyhay922]

What would I say to my younger self: I'll be here. I'll do my best for you, to take care of you. Don't give up. You're stronger then you realize. Keep going, I'll be here

[@lisahead6868]

I need this workshop😢

[@PoshASMR]

Idk if I can heal my inner child why do I feel so disconnected to my past - it’s like a lot of those memories are blocked out…and idk what I would say to myself when they mentioned it I just feel sadness 😔 I think I would just want to hug myself

[@NothingCompares2U]

This is a real helpful channel for me and I was just thinking not whether or not my relationship is a certain way or not, I feel that is seeming a lot more important than it is. People can be judgemental, but my advice to myself is to do the fasting and meditation and the health food and to abstain from relationships as much as possible either way. Focus on friends and don't let physical relationships take the place of real spiritual relationships.

[@NothingCompares2U]

They say intelligence is recognizing a mistake when we make it over again....

[@charlenehoffman8074]

Hi Kyle, I absolutely love your channel. I'm have also have seen Judy and D r. R aa maní here

[@hotpotato4023]

Always wanted to see Dr. Judy with dark hair. She looks stunning ❤

[@danielakrebs3976]

Thank You very much! Same to Y💙u!!!!

[@MedCircle]

Thanks for tuning in!

[@danielakrebs3976]

@@MedCircle ❤💙❤

[@annahass8427]

He does look great❤

[@itviking1651]

This relationship between inner child work and the effects of addressing inner child issues can be seen in the treatment of DID. That is essentially how DID is successfully treated. In fact, in the case of a DID system, resolving inner child issues can result in an entirely new personality as the parts heal & integrate.

[@VickyG212]

Id be happy to help get this video subtitles for English and Spanish. I think it's a great resource. Let me know if I can help 😊

[@ryarya3291]

you talk about multiple workshops. I can't find them. Theres only the link for the inner child!

[@vg1176]

Where is possible to find the whole mirror gazing exercise? Thank you! ❤

[@gracewarrior5354]

I read the book, "Healing the Inner Child", very informative 😇 I'm thinking that incarcerated/rehabilitation system NEEDS 2 IMPLEMENT ALOT of these videos, as well as the people who sent them there ❣️💯 Oh I about forgot, our "Counseling & recovery" community 🙄😉😇

[@krisscanlon4051]

ACA meetings and literature changed me 5 years ago.

[@sonnyca]

I’ve already imagined what I’d say to my younger self. “Run away from home and don’t look back.”

[@gailgood2022]

can not find the links to the free workshops

[@attheranch4876]

I don’t see a link for the inner child workshop , is it still available?

[@garolay4679]

Is the subscription a weekly or monthly subscription? If anyone

[@thefc3671]

the universe only brought me in when we were past Kyle's posturing been in therapy since childhood and no therapist said homsexuality is child hood trauma, enmeshment, and maladaptive coping, d'oh! perfect example of therapy being all landing a sale and not any understanding or admission of truth.

[@sheilamurry9875]

My inner child wants to listen and she would like to respond without being told an answer in a harsh tone and when she can ask a question she would like an honest answers. She likes to play. She wants to pray. Most of all she wants to be herself

[@bethmiller9774]

I don't see the link(s) to the Workshops...

[@merishormeri57]

where's the link for the workshop? pls?

[@LightintheDark2056]

👍❤️

[@zelik654]

👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

[@user-uc1px7ks7g]

I had an adventurous childhood.

[@thirdrockjul2224]

👍

[@adaptercrash]

A process problem that create isolated networks and assemblage theory, they just don't care that you only get to be a child or teenager once they all end up successful. Mines all like whoa. They have get your own network and make rules. It's a mix of various intelligences that fall back. Intentional.

[@tlwf.system]

What if you have d.i.d and don't know any of your previous inner child's ?

[@kliberalsing]

14:45 !

[@skhan9277]

I’d tell my five year old self, “you are loved.”

[@thomasdoyle9748]

Nice smile, Kyle. The wife

[@sweetsticky]

I'd say...I got you.

[@bethmiller9774]

Ha - good one!

[@ets42681]

The audio and lip movement not in synk

[@ryarya3291]

Hi, why are you less often on youtube?

[@thefc3671]

"Don't idolize us! We're all friends" said no therapist ever!

[@KoolT]

5:10

[@alexruizydeteresa6425]

Guapo

[@TarkMcCoy]

World Mental Health Day: That's Crazy! -rejected slogan

[@user-uc1px7ks7g]

I am normal i look to my oven if its out 3 times yes somethimes i do that to be sure breins can be wierd and if this makes you safe then yes do that.

[@DD-jm5ug]

It's not free?

[@NicoleWSimone]

Seeing a lot of videos about childhood PTSD or CPTSD. And Childhood PTSD is sounding a lot like BPD without wanting to call it that… can you do a video on the difference and rectify any wrong beautifying title. To be honest I think I only enjoy your videos

[@kimbers1238]

I would probably say I'm so sorry honey. Things shouldn't be this way.

[@reg8297]

Your present moments can be unlivable due to life long effects of child abuse

[@user-uc1px7ks7g]

You know you should be worried whne your so happy make good food and never check back your oven or gas if its out before you eat.

[@justnoted2995]

Put the expert on earlier... we are waiting in boredom man

[@myJOJA]

0:18 can I...? because I'm scared😢... Seems like you're angry about it 😮

[@thomasdoyle9748]

What if your inner child never grew up?

[@Asto508]

Well, make it grow up. It's yourself, you know. You become what you allow to experience on yourself. If you don't like your current emotional maturity, go change it. If not, also fine if you are aware of the consequences. It all boils down to responsibility.

[@oneness1_]

You don't look to ur past so why bring up ur inner child? Tell the inner child that the inner adult is here and it will be happy to know it can relax

[@Asto508]

lol, there is no inner adult that didn't grow from your inner child. If you think of these as distinct entities as a concept, you are already compartmentalizing. There is only one inner self that can grow and develop but it will always be formed by the very first stages of childhood.

[@oneness1_]

@@Asto508 there too much focus on the inner child these days...so I had to laugh at why not focus on the inner adult. The one inner self is not a child/adult. Compartmentalizing is conceptual as u point out but truth is I can't seem to find where the inner child/adult is other than memories of the past...not very helpful 😀

[@itviking1651]

Btw.... I'd tell my 10 years old self... "Buy Apple, Google, and Amazon stock." ;)

[@infinitybless7132]

I would say your parents getting divorced is not ok but you will be ok. 🙏💋

[@GinKirk7256]

Kyle, when did you first question your sexuality?

[@thefc3671]

you're not going to be ground breaking if you refuse to be stronger, more truthful, than a baby boomer. you have to learn to accept that the baby boomer that raised you, was sick. and they used their own children. if you are going to say anything insightful, you have to agree that whatever you learned from baby boomer, is false. that includes what the therapist said when you were 9 years old, that would keep you attached to that baby boomer, that was paying for you to see them in their office, the therapist is a sales person. lol. you have to think for yourself. how did I say what nobody else said? I thought for myself. you no. somebody influenced you to believe homsexuality is great! your ticket to supply! and you don't question it. you blindly accept it, and it leads you to dead end. sadness in eyes.

[@laurenhutton8387]

This guy looks dead in the eyes :(