My Life with Selective Mutism [Full Autobiography]

[@cococure1659]

I'm a teacher and I've learned so much about SM by watching your video. I believe that things are a blessing in disguise. I know it was rough at times in school but I see in this video how it has benefited you in many ways. You are hilarious, smart, and most of all kind..I can feel and hear you kindness in you voice and that's awesome!!

[@DudeMcNick]

awww Thank You! That was very nice of you! I'm glad I could help a little bit.

[@temperanceyoworld3818]

|-/. I suffer from SM, I'm in 10th grade. 8th-9th grade I didn't speak a work the entire school year. My SM developed in 6th grade (really late) this video is amazing. I've been bullied, teachers and students tried bribing me, cornering me asking me to speak. Even writing was difficult. Some days I would feel confident and plan to finally speak at school but when the time came. I never could do it. I attempted suicide this year. I was in the hospital and a mental hospital for some time. I saw tons of therapists ect. It took me all of that to decide to really start putting 200% of my effort into speaking. This year I'm going into 10th grade I'm scared shitless but I'm ready and I hope to do better. This video helped me tons.

[@DudeMcNick]

Temperance Yoworld I'm glad this video could help you out. For me a new scenery helped me slightly move on and finally speak to teachers. it wasn't till I made thos video that I finally spoke to the rest of my relatives. it became a habbit not to and I was stuck. So I made a leap of fate with this video and took a HUGE chance to change my life and I'm glad I did :) Good Luck!!

[@Katinnity]

Temperance Yoworld people do the same to me...

[@MollyDoble0]

Thank you for making this video. I'm in the same boat, I struggled with this for most of my childhood but I slowly got (almost all the way) better. So much of what you described resonated with me. It's nice to hear experiences from other people who understand what selective mutism feels like.

[@DudeMcNick]

Thanks! Glad to see you're also improving :)

[@AntonioCarlos-mq2hk]

Hi molly. Thank goodness you are getting out of this. Good for you. I have a 16 yrs old daughter who has SM since SK. Kindly share with us on what to do with someone with SM. Thank you.

[@annieweixler2002]

I would watch this until the end, no doubt! I think Nick gives a valuable perspective into selective mutism, as well as other anxiety disorders many people don't understand. Very well done!

[@6monthstoblack473]

Great video! Mom to a 14 year old with SM who doesn't think she has it.. Thank you for making this! Awesome job pushing past SM.. You are awesome!!

[@DudeMcNick]

Awww Thank You! :) Hope all is going well, it'll be a matter of time before they open up I'm sure. High School will definitely open something out :)

[@14THEPINKPANTHER]

Well done Nick! Proud of you taking this step and being more open. I hope they are more opportunities like this for you in the future. Thanks for sharing your story.

[@shyskye9254]

Thank you for sharing your story!

[@Gillyella]

Thank you Nick for making the video and spreading awareness. My 6 year old daughter Nicole has SM and is trying so hard to overcome it. Your video is very inspiring, Thank you :)

[@DudeMcNick]

Thank you for those kind words. I hope all of you can get through it especially Nicole.

[@archeraimsaarrow3864]

+Vlogs124 Personal Hi i have suffered from SM since I was 5 too and i'm finally going out to get help for it i'm 21. If it is possible for you look online for a therapist that specializes in adult selective mutism. Or talk to your doctor about it or bring notes to youe doctor and request thw doctor to find you a specialist that can treat adult selective mutism. This is what I am doing and I know it will be the only way for me to get completely better and it will be the best choice for a better fullfilling fututure. Reach out and seek help show your dad and grandparent youtube videos that can explain SM to them that way the video will give you the words to describe what your going through that you cannot physically express in words. Your family will love and support you knowing that you have this disorder and that it is something to be treated. it will be hard but please do it you have got to take this step for yourself to have a future you can be in control of and a life you can be happy and fullfilled in. It's always better out then in! Start planning out a presentation that you can show your dad that won't have to involve you speaking if your not comfortable but make the presenation as understandable as possible to your dad. You could write down what you would like your dad to know and include them in your power point for example: you may want to tell your dad how you feel when you are expected to talk you could let him know that it's not a choice that you want to be mute, that you have the desire to talk that you really want to but your voice does not come out your body will not let your voice come out and your body shuts down that you are not talking to be defiant or rude or disobediant or to rebel and be difficult but simply that you have an extreme phobia of talking that makes your body physically fight back at the desire of talking and freezes your throat. Give a brief summary of what selective mutism is and that it is a real anxiety disorder and how it dibilitates a person from speaking. Let him know that alot of people suffer from selective mutism if you can provide links to websites about selective mutism in your powerpoint with more infomation. add this video and other youtube videos about selective mutism (as many thar you can find) that validate selective mutism and how other people experience it. Let your dad know at the end of the presentation that you want to get better and want to be a functioning human and that you have a voice that wants to be heard but you need his help and support to find it. The more emotional the presentation and the more emotional your dad gets while watching it will be all the better because that will help start a bond and truely connect you's so that you can start your journey together in treating this horrible disorder. Let him know that there are therapists who specialize in treating selective mutsim and also go to the doctor. Include ways of how you would like you dad to help you can you think of somethings your dad could do to help you overcome this by maybe showing understanding, being patient, doing and saying things that will boost your confidence and self esteem. Think of how you think your support your needs, what do you need him to do for you? He is your dad and it is in his duty as your carer to attend to your needs. If you need help in finding websites about selective mutism or youtube videos You can ask me to link you some for you because I have plenty saved up my sleeve for very situations you yourself is in, the more you and the people in your life know about it the better they can know how to help and understand what your going through. Trust me it will change your life for the better. Knowlege is the power to ovecome fear.

[@archeraimsaarrow3864]

+Amy T Not only to your dad to your mum and grandparents too.

[@archeraimsaarrow3864]

+Amy T and if you have sibilings it is good for them to know as well. You are suffering in silence and it is desperatly time for you to be heard. The more support you have around you the better my friend.

[@hjamesgilmore3104]

Great job Nick! Thanks for making this important documentary and in sharing your story.

[@joannehouslay5820]

It isn’t a choice! I have selective mutism and cannot choose if I speak or not. It is a situational extreme anxiety disorder. Mine comes with speech processing disorder and a severe speech impediment!

[@AA-ij4gm]

Thank you for making this video it's really helping me I also have selective mutism and people don't understand about it I try to have positive mind and overcome it so it's getting better slowly someday I hope I can totally overcome it and can tell people about selective mutism also I want to share my story! :) I hope they will understand me...

[@DudeMcNick]

Glad I could help out. Staying positive is the key and a slow pace at overcoming it is better than at no pace. Even when I was over it, it still took me some time to open up more and express myself.

[@Nikkayyful]

I don't know what is the cause of my sm . I wish I wasn't this way. It has been awful , I just want to hide away somewhere away from everyone.

[@DudeMcNick]

Niki Mouse I don't know how mine started as well, but it stuck, and it stuck for a long time I felt scared to change that even though I knew I had to. I decided over time (because in reality I wanted to do this video 2-3 years now) to just throw myself out there and see how it goes. I just went for it and took a chance. I'm glad I did :)

[@thatvampirechick8802]

my selective mutism is different. it got worst in highschool and its just getting worst

[@DudeMcNick]

I wish you the best for the future. I was at a stand still up until I made this video. Reason why I made it, just so it can hopefully be over and share with others what selective mutism is and that it's a real thing people go through.

[@thatvampirechick8802]

DudeMcNick thanks

[@6monthstoblack473]

How are you doing now?

[@AntonioCarlos-mq2hk]

Same thing that is happening to my 16 yr old daughter who is in grade 11. First time she skipped school this first semester of grade 11 but got back the second semester with the help of flouxetine and psychotherapy every week. So far the progress what I'm seeing is she's back in school but not actually doing any homework. In terms of speaking or socializing, it's still the same as before. How are you doing now?

[@elle56]

me has too

[@Platinum907]

Good for you! I have a boyfriend whose mother has SM and I don't enjoy her company. To be candid, being around someone who rarely speaks but just smiles & makes little 'sounds' is a waste of my time. Because their isn't a two way exchange there's no opportunity for any real connection. As individuals, we are the only ones that can choose to make change happen, in your case although it wasn't easy, you did it! Personal growth is born from overcoming obstacles & never giving up, growth is often derived from the struggle. Often times, if we want better for ourselves we accept that the world isn't going to adapt to us, we have to adapt to it. Hers' is a very small & codependent world, which from the outside looking in seems especially sad because she is a parent.

[@DudeMcNick]

Brandy Schade She did still have a life raising a kid and managed through obstacles to get him places. From my experience, the more you try to communicate, over time the more open they will become (but it still takes time to adapt). When I was quiet, a lot of people thought I was this or that, but when I started talking more and opening up, they didn't expect who i actually am deep inside. It just took time to open up. I wish you the best of luck though! :)

[@archeraimsaarrow3864]

I'm in your boyfriends mothers situation. and it hit hard I have a little 19month old and I am going to get better for him and for myself and for my family it is very much for all of us who suffer it as you described her little world to be unfortunatly I did not know about it when I was a child so I did not get the help I needed then so I am taking it into my own hands to get better because my mum also has SM and like your boyfriends mother only smiles and says Ohh. I can't connect with her most of the time and its harder watching her socialize. My dad is a similar case he has Autism and never talks having parents who dont talk or engage or show emotion to each other or much to me caused alot of hardships and led to me not being safe and secure which lead to some pretty terrible childhood trauma that happend to me. And I see them and I see me now and how much I am like them and it breaks me because I don't want to be the quiet awkward cold aloof anxious person espeically as a mother..what kind of mother would that be! that goes against everything in a mothers nature to be! I luckily don't think I am as bad as my mum but I know if i was not going to get help I would eventually turn into my parents because well its what i observed growing up and even tho it goes against my nature (i am actually naturally really funny and have quite a big personality and can talk so much and connect really well when im comfortable) I always knew i wanted to be the opposite of how they interacted with people but now i can feel myself interacting in the same way they do. What advicd would you say to your boyfriends mother?

[@richardsantanna5398]

It's tough. It's tough.

[@afredheath]

why are you labeling your shyness as a mental disorder?

[@afredheath]

so... you were shy and grew out of it