My Marriage Was Worse Than Hell For Almost 20 Years - Kholeka M

[@EngineerYLShow]

TURN ON CAPTIONS FOR ENGLISH SUBTITLES! Vulnerability. Reflection. Decisive actions. That is what Kholeka represents. It’s a privilege to have you come back and enjoy our episodes time and time again. Even if you’re new, welcome. We are on a mission to reach 100K changed lives, kindly subscribe and leave your comment of support. It means a lot to us 🙌🏿

[@shironjuguna5853]

@EngineerYLShow as an international viewer, you've earned a subscriber because you've made provisions for us who are following but can't understand vernec! I wish other SA podcasts would follow this!

[@EngineerYLShow]

@@shironjuguna5853Thank you so much ❤

[@khanyimkhizwana8048]

Lungelo is a good listener like the fact he doesn't interrupt the guest.

[@ozzaM22]

37 and very much single and I refuse to lower my standards I would rather die single than allow a man to disrespect me yho! I'm always told I am unlucky with relationships phofu kutsho ladies ezibekezeleyo and settled for mediocrity all in the name of being in a relationship😢 nka loma engineer your life😂 great work Lungsta🎉❤

[@leahlinki5683]

I'm 55 and I feel exactly the way you do! 😊😊😊😊

[@wpp1586]

I hope you don't have kids either.

[@NMC1634]

I agree with you. DO NOT COMPROMISE SIS. Been married for 29 years and I support you 110%. You must never!

[@cindyrambau4476]

He cheated on me just after a year of getting married, I decided to cheat back with my ex😂😂😂came back pregnant 🤰 and it was a mess😂😂😂the rest is history

[@leahlinki5683]

@@cindyrambau4476 Hectic! 🤣🤣🤣🤣. Just take care: mental health is very important, especially with children involved.

[@mslettiemathibe71]

Men are cruel 😢😢 3 kids later and so many years of marriage 😭😭😭😭 He is so heartless 💔uSisi didn't deserve this treatment. He hated her and made sure to bury her identity. Im glad she is still fighting for her dignity and dreams. You can see she is still ambitious and lovely and full of life. May God bless her come up.

[@nelzg5819]

She is so beautiful and well spoken. Ai amadoda who cheat suka man😢

[@thobilemditshwa8799]

When she said I love Xhosa men, that hit hard coz nam I love my Xhosa women. Uxolo for everything you went through Sisi Kholeka. UThixo soze akubeke entlungwini without a purpose, find your purpose and you'll find fulfilment in your life. God bless you

[@Sunflower__Queen]

She is so pretty.

[@gugumasuku4808]

Man can change, break you, and make sure that you are nothing and end up asking yourself if there's something wrong with you.

[@umthwebulimo]

Lungelo is such a great listener and interviewer man 🫷🏽😔🫸🏽

[@thembisamakhoba1606]

Toomuch ❤

[@LukeRev480]

Kholeka being a career woman suits you. You look like a director or a successful business woman, your demeanor. I respect and love your inlaws bayaphila shame and they deeply care about the children. SengathiuThixo angabasikelela. It's a pity their brother is immatured.

[@megasolutions4757]

iyooo this young lady was living my life. i was so naïve exactly like her

[@sninimoyo5320]

I wish young women would protect their wombs and stay employed. I relate to this story in a different way

[@gugumkhwanazi9482]

Sister, I've been there. I'm shining better than before. Before gold becomes gold, it goes through a lot of processes. You're shining, and you'll still shone🎉. God is going to bless you more than you can imagine. Stay blessed.

[@CeeMotsoeneng]

Kholeka, you are beautiful and very wise. The wisdom comes from your experience. They made you a great woman you are. Please never believe any less than that❤️

[@thembikunene4531]

So so 👍 ❤🌷🇿🇦

[@gugumkhwanazi9482]

There's King for you out there beautiful QUEEN ❤. KEEP BELIEVING

[@judysharon864]

You are viewed internationally kindly make it easy for us not to miss a word by translating your native language to English. Much love from Kenya

[@nobukhosimczebra]

@@judysharon864 turn on your subtitles dear.They allow visitors to speak their language so they can be free and express themselves well

[@sunflawa]

they did translate... turn it on

[@thandekadikane6188]

Click on the screen, select CC on your screen, you'll get subtitles

[@sindiswasizane344]

She is relating the story so beautifully in isiXhosa❤, I almost feel like I know her personally

[@FanelwaNgece]

Lungelo, you are great at your work. Keep it up Sir.

[@EngineerYLShow]

You’re too kind 🙏🏾

[@thembikunene4531]

So so true, I've listened to several interviews, he is good and he knows when to ask questions. He is a good interviewer🙏🙏💖🌷❤️🍁🇿🇦🇿🇦

[@palesapolette8168]

Well spoken,beautiful interview

[@thembikunene4531]

Very much so🙏🙏💖♥️🌷🇿🇦🇿🇦🇿🇦

[@Natalie_574]

You will find the man who will love you effortlessly❤❤❤❤And You will be happy again❤❤❤❤

[@Miss_Sir2]

Beautiful interview Lungelo ❤

[@matimbabaloyi2585]

She is beautiful

[@nelzg5819]

She is❤😢

[@amow_mee9488]

Imagine he took you out of your comfortable life only to mistreat you😩I’m 21 and the way i fear men and marriages yoh.

[@nokhanyobonga4861]

Stay away from these creatures 😢thy r so evil 😢

[@musamoloi2149]

@@amow_mee9488 focus on your self mam, study travel build your career and make money. You still very young. I’m 32 , took time to build my career, I’m very happy with how everything turned out because I used my 20s to build myself.

[@LorraineGumede-l3h]

Thank you for sharing your journey sisi. I relate with your story a lot. I have 3 beautiful kids who are now young adults. Married at 24 and still in a toxic marriage for 23 years. Fear holds me back. I feel stronger now to walk away but i got retrenched in 2022 making it difficult for me to imagine life without an income. I do wish i can meet you and have a conversation and guidance. I would say 75% of your journey is my journey and it seems like narcists have a same script.

[@Inno4839]

@@LorraineGumede-l3h I’m married to a narcissist as well 😢

[@Jellybeans-j7y]

@@LorraineGumede-l3h You plan for it, start save every penny you have n build your life

[@nthubekhi9068]

Heish.. To think I struggled with the pain of not being married young. I really wanted to be a young wife only accepting recently that no being married young was just not for me, who knows maybe is for a good reason I did not get married young. Maybe just maybe... I wish this sister all the best. May the Lord continue to give her strength. In all honesty we have been conditioned to want marriage. We put it on a high pedestal but sometimes, it's just not it

[@sibongisenisakhele3114]

Such a refreshing spirit!

[@thuliramolefe1960]

It's so telling of the person he is if HIS family is telling her to check thoroughly

[@lesley_lezley]

Imagine struggle love on such a beautiful woman.

[@kgotlelelotlaka1491]

Joh why do i relate so much to her story 😢😢

[@sibusiwengqwemesa9024]

Most men are abusive and controlling my sister that's why you are relating, most women went through zonke ezizinto azibalisayo lo cc especially xa ungasebenzi

[@thembekadorcaskhumalo866]

@@kgotlelelotlaka1491 🫂🫂🫂

[@HloiMollo]

I need to come and relate my story

[@Cleo256]

I know her I didn't think she was going through so much....she's very strong and beautiful.

[@christymwangi]

Watching from Kenya. Kindly speak English for your International viewers.

[@EngineerYLShow]

Turn on your subtitles. We allow our guests to freely speak their language so they are able to speak their truth, hence subtitles are provided.

[@LukeRev480]

​@@EngineerYLShowEnkosi Lungelo

[@alexandertheblack4292]

Yessess, who you love in this life can either break you or make you. Young ladies, learn from this story. Le ska phaphela dilo!

[@preciousnotico]

Turn on the CC to get the translation

[@nikkiejonathan7514]

@@preciousnotico where do we find it. I understand stand her but won’t like I took a Quick Look and didn’t see the CC maybe these other people don’t see it . Please share

[@nondumisotundube8616]

Such a beautiful a lady bethuna

[@akosuamvotyo1655]

I cried just watching this because I relate to this so much 😭😭I appreciate feminism

[@hlengiwehadebe_]

I’m deeply sorry for what you went through. Getting married young can easily make you persevere wrong situations becoz of being inexperienced. Ayi ke Yoh the abuse you went through during your pregnancy 💔 no one deserves being in pain whilst pregnant

[@NonoKomane]

I was 19 with a 34 years old when I was also distracted and lobola was paid. I regret

[@sepakimelbourne6657]

Eish can't continue with listening to this 😢😢😢😢😢😢I am scared of abuse n.....

[@AsandaGora-o4y]

Beautiful interview keep up the good work😊😊

[@vuyogqola]

Their marriage was so toxic😢

[@LethoHali]

1:03:24 yooo! Only realising now that this is the same lady who went to madam Speaker! 😂 oh my days. Love how this interview got different information ℹ️. All the best cc!

[@denisemphahlele]

Such a beautiful woman, wasted her 20 years for nothing💔

[@gugumkhwanazi9482]

Educating story. There are people asking English from interviews. There's a transcript that's in English!!! Bethuna 😂

[@SibongileNdubane]

To young women out there,Marriage is a mess,class of hatred.I don't wish anyone get married. I salute you sisi with your decision 👏

[@faithdalasile102]

Ohhh my I'm late, I love it here. Why is she familiar 🤔🤔

[@Cleo256]

​@@rinaesengani correct

[@Winterflowers1]

I think she was on madam speaker podcast

[@faithdalasile102]

@@Winterflowers1ooh ja recently I remember now I was just wondering.

[@francinahmolosiwa2087]

​@Winterflowers1 Yes she was at madam speaker podcast. Is she now going to do interviews with all Podcasters 🤔

[@dkmolebatsi5387]

That men didnt love u but not only you but didn't love his kids either .What kind of a Monster he is.Our Parents also this thing of Men are to be listened to yo.Yes Respect but we need to work together be companions. Sorry Babes.Lungi thanks for all this it's an educational journey to other woman who are going through the same❤

[@gugumkhwanazi9482]

Indeed sistaz. U Thixo yena, uyabonelela BBBBIIIIIGGGG TIME. HE DID IT TO ME, HE'S STILL DOING IT TODAY ❤. AMEN

[@headmanhebe6963]

Losisi went through a lot. I am glad she is out of hell because she deserves better... I like the fact that she still believes in love and marriage.... I do too. Nam ndiyaya game two, emtshatweni. Certainly, most of us, not just women, tend to ignore the red flags... Maybe, we are too naive or we are desperate to make the marriage work. Kodwa ke, mna I do not do that anymore. Please never ignore the red flags, they usually show up very early in a relationship and, trust your gut and be prepared to walk....

[@ShenaazM]

Road to 100K

[@annecalep5966]

I love following this podcast but don't understand the language so will sign off here.

[@EngineerYLShow]

Did you turn on subtitles? It’s fully translated

[@buzanin699]

Click on your screen you will see cc you press on it you good to go

[@Ngunikaz]

Keep pushing , if u made it , you can

[@LethoHali]

Got married at 19 nam. And it lasted 20yrs. And yeah… it was hell (in hindsight 😅)

[@HloiMollo]

Let's go and relate our stories

[@LethoHali]

@ let’s go 😆

[@missbeby100]

Im happy i listened to her story her regret was staying longer in the marriage. Im also struggling with a serial cheater husband, but this one manipulates me to believe he has changed. We will do everything to get back to normal n little months down the line he is back to his old ways. My weakness is that he really plays good when he says he has changed. For me I beleive so easily, after watching this i think i should pull tje plug

[@NomsaDube-v6f]

Now he is no more and I'm crying for him im really confused how can i cry for him

[@nompiloangelmakamo5414]

Thanks Kholeka for sharing your story, don't beat yourself up for staying longer anyway you won 3 beautiful childrens,may you find healing,you right we ignore red flags sometimes it's not because of society but we believe that we are good people will take care of them and there's no way they wouldn't change or not treat us right.

[@Jellybeans-j7y]

Thank you ❤for sharing your experience ❤

[@HloiMollo]

Kholeka is so beautiful. That man lost a gold

[@lungelomanifest]

Lungsta amazing interviews All the ones ive managed to watch. The 1 thing that disturbs me visually, that big framed photograph of You, it disturbs how brilliant your guests are double impact to have you in all shots as your smiling profile pic keeps popping over her head every time she moves...

[@sibusiwengqwemesa9024]

Ohh my sister you've been through a lot yhoo and kubuhlungu cc ukulawulwa yindoda and iba worse xa ungasebenzi ivele iku controle ngeendlela zonke...ngxesi cc wam ❤❤❤❤ azilibaleki sana tuu but as time goes on uzobaryt my sister

[@EMdee1986again]

The "mmmh," always does it for me 😅😅

[@nosibulelembophane2687]

She’s such a gorgeous lady

[@botse6088]

My sister you went through hell, thank you for telling your story because this is what a lot of women go through in this country. I have learned that man don't respect humble women, humbleness doesn't work for man, they interpret it as being stupid. God doesn't sleep, he will pay for destroying his family one way or the other. Please go through Isaiah 54 and confess it every day. Surely God will come through for you. Keep telling your story my sister for those ladies that are in mental hospital and can't talk for themselves or the ones who died due to abuse or stress. I have learned that a man who doesn't buy furniture or house, no insurance but has children probably doesn't want to build with you, that is a big red flag. You are going to be OK mama

[@wellavanqa5197]

Mmmhhhh....I wonder if its not adv Baloi on the Senzo Meyiwa case🤔

[@Miss_Sir2]

I’m so sorry sis about what you went through.. 💔. I’m struggling to understand how the pregnancies came about kule misery that you’re talking about, unless there were happy moments that were not mentioned.

[@hlengiwehadebe_]

Unless you’ve never been with a narcissist before you wouldn’t understand 😊

[@Miss_Sir2]

@ utsho nhe? So there are usually happy moments in between? I’m not being disrespectful with this comment ndibuza nyani

[@hlengiwehadebe_]

@@Miss_Sir2 no. There aren’t happy moments

[@siphokaziluzipho4197]

I'm sure there are no happy moments wethu, but men will sleep with their wives while abusing them emotionally.

[@PhumeleleKunju-ud5iq]

You don’t need to happy to have sex

[@kathlegothangwana6577]

what a gorgeous lady😍

[@gailainsley6939]

15:03 her grandma just setting her up for failure. SMH

[@tukiejohannes9771]

I'm fan from Namibia 🇳🇦 can you guys speak more English ❤

[@Noms-qe3hf]

We go in to please people 😢

[@NomsaDube-v6f]

Yhooo sista i know what you are talking about being there same situation

[@NonoKomane]

So she kept on being pregnant after learning the hard way, aiiii sisi

[@Wanguicathy]

Good conversation but the native language is very disruptive to US from other countries especially us that prefer to listen in as we work and don't have time for captions

[@EngineerYLShow]

We are a proudly South African platform and our heritage will be preserved at all costs. Subtitles exist for that reason. Trust that is well explained. ❤

[@Wanguicathy]

@EngineerYLShow Ur pride and patriotism shouldn't limit international followers who love and follow you,if you wanted to speak in your native language u could have opened a fully native channel, learn to take Ur followers insights without overly seeming petty or rude in your replies uuuuuffff.

[@hlanzekakhonzinkosi5899]

⁠​⁠@@Wanguicathyplease use subtitles, what’s rude and petty about that?

[@EMdee1986again]

Is this kholeka the former singer ?

[@LethoHali]

32:57 😢😢😢😢😢😢😢

[@nokhanyobonga4861]

😢😢he was yo enemy 😢😢

[@MaureenXaba-i4p]

Dont allow the man to control you from the start you can respect him as your parner but dont let him to control you the problem with us as women we showing to much love to the person that dont even love you you can beautiful as much as you are but dont trust the man beacause they are evil starting from their parents may his Mother was being abused by his father infront of him now his Gonna takeout all this frustration on you for rest of you life

[@jabulanemthembu7805]

Sisi I suggest that you forget about marriage, concentrate on yourself and children,you have 3 children,you will be hurt more, please.

[@bojangmekgwe3205]

❤❤❤

[@shm113]

English please!!

[@mcdollard7469]

Khohlakele amadoda kodwa ewe nothi onke

[@claireadhiambo3440]

Is this show not for international audiences too😢....had to stop watching.....barely understood the foreign language

[@phebvlymo2068]

Not all of us are south africans please help us in english

[@preciousnotico]

Turn on the CC to get the translation

[@Razaka-b1t]

Hahaha can't wait for a day guy going "ndim uze nentlantla in her life"

[@muitolinkemsky]

Yooh 😮😢

[@MBINGATATI]

Started in English and switched to local language midway 🙆🏽‍♀️🙆🏽‍♀️lost us

[@preciousnotico]

Turn on the CC to get the translation

[@Siphosenkosi-z1x]

I don't trust lo sisi. Bhuti was mugged, then the break-inn 🤔🤔🤔

[@faithing88]

This is what narcissistic abuse does to you YOU END UP looking and sounding crazy Get psychological help dear Your story is all over and its because of the psycholigical trauma, you sound mentally disturbed 😢

[@thobilembuli8571]

Haybo 😭🥺. Backhanded much?

[@ModikweSentso-gr7nq]

Crazy is this comment.

[@Inno4839]

@@thobilembuli8571Yhu!

[@francinahmolosiwa2087]

But this lady did interview with madamspeaker 🤔

[@masandefuzile2261]

We Narcissists we love our kids.

[@Winterflowers1]

That man does not love those kids, how does a parent let his kids go without basics such as food if he loves the kids

[@ameliasmommyshazi7585]

Why are you a narcissist thou what you guys gain from hurting other people 😢

[@nontobekobiyela2548]

You dont hurt their mom if you love them. You should want her healthy in the mind, happy so she can be energetic to raise them up properly

[@TheFinestKanye]

Ano English or mother tongue? Why start off with a language u can’t maintain? A waste of my 20 minutes!

[@preciousnotico]

Turn on the CC to get the translation

[@laniahg1292]

​@@preciousnotico thank you 😊

[@EMAKHAYA_SALON]

So this sister is perfect bcoz she never mentioned one thing she did wrong in this marriage, not even one thing. everything nje wena u did was perfect ayi no sister. Wena awu back chat, awudeleli, awumshayi, awumukhiyeli ngaphandle, u go as i travel agent and u come back ur husband is angry and ure asking urself why hes angry. Ay women stop it, this guy doesnt sound like a good guy but my sister uzenza u mother Theressa manje.

[@Winterflowers1]

And then wena, is everything Ohk at home??

[@sinethembamaseko5901]

@@Winterflowers1ungaze umbuze or wazana ne husband maybe

[@addie8397]

Are you the ex husband??? 👀Such bitterness 😂

[@hlengiwehadebe_]

Such dense statements

[@EMAKHAYA_SALON]

@ i dnt understand wats tht suppose to do with the topic. im not attcking her im just stating my observation from the interview. this story is one sided and u expect everyone to just take wateva she is saying bcoz she is a woman?

[@EMAKHAYA_SALON]

Ur husband want to leave you and you blv he only married you bcoz he wanted a raise at work. all this sounds like the person you might be, who thinks like that?

[@faithing88]

She is not psychology there, she is disturbed. She is stuck at 19years, listen to how she speaks and expresses herself like an excitable 19 year old. She is a child mentally and it occurs when one is deeply hurt 😂

[@hlengiwehadebe_]

😹😹😹is everything okay at home??

[@EMAKHAYA_SALON]

@@hlengiwehadebe_ 🤣🤣🤣🤣 no everything is not alright at home i need your advice🤣🤣🤣

[@EMAKHAYA_SALON]

i bet you R1000 she once cheated on him bt she wont mention that part bcoz shez here to play victim. and you can tell she never really apologised properly bcoz she always plays victim. i really wish we had both sides of the story bcoz this doesnt make sense.

[@dare2be520]

Ex husband we see you 😅

[@michellekeitumetsi9950]

Exactly 😂😂​@@dare2be520

[@hlengiwehadebe_]

@emakhaya_salon HEAL😹😹

[@EMAKHAYA_SALON]

@@dare2be520 🤣🤣🤣🤣 blv wateva makes you sleep at night

[@EMAKHAYA_SALON]

@@hlengiwehadebe_ 🤣🤣🤣🤣 this comment really hurt me i think i really need to heal, thanks 😂

[@kayarosho9814]

Care for your heart, mind and soul...well done Sisi Kholeka 🫂