MY SICK ONLINE ADDICTION (Final Fantasy XI) - Happy Console Gamer

I talk about my Online addiction to Final Fantasy 11
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Join Johnny Millenium The Happy Console Gamer as he discusses new video game news and reviews forgotten games that not many people know about but should!

[@GrandMasterPeep]

I don’t know why but I’ve watched this video about 6 times in the past 4 years.

[@jmwlife2k]

Same!!!

[@safrazk7407]

Ditto

[@averyhonestnintendofanboy7624]

I’ve watched it so many times as well

[@joshuaday_]

me rn lol

[@RoninXDarknight]

We're all still fighting the addiction...and prolly will be for as long as the game is active.

[@vayneglory655]

You aren't alone. I almost failed highschool because of this game.

[@Johnhopkins88]

uh.. i missed 158 out of 219 days in 10th grade cause of this game. before i quit i had close to 1200 days played

[@alfonsoortega5408]

John Hopkins holy shit

[@xHiyami]

I missed half of all highschool, and failed. So thats half of 9-10-11 and 12.

[@HaikelTV]

i failed university because of video games so DUH !

[@PasserbyP]

Did u really?

[@deepfrz]

FFXI DISCLAIMER "Exploring Vana'diel is a thrilling experience. During your time here, you will be able to talk, join, and adventure with many other individuals in an experience that is unique to online games. That being said, we have no desire to see your real life suffer as a consequence. Don't forget your family, your friends, your school, or your work."

[@adamsasinowski7733]

My ass they had no desire. Their entire profit was built around feeding the addiction

[@adamsasinowski7733]

If they didn't want addicts ruining their lives they wouldn't have required 10 HOURS just to gain 1 level, 3 hours to find a party, 20 minutes just to find a camp etc

[@breeze7464]

@@adamsasinowski7733 it's your choice how much time you put in. No one is holding a gun to your head. Take some responsibility. It's not the companies responsibility to monitor and regulate play time. Smfh, this is such a smooth brain argument.

[@breeze7464]

@@adamsasinowski7733 also, if it took you 10 hrs to get one level, you had no idea what you were doing or how to play the game to begin with...

[@tac7288]

@@adamsasinowski7733 Can we also remind you that this was one of the first MMOs released? Before WOW revolutionized MMOs as we knew it?

[@charlottestewart1851]

my mom threatened to divorce my dad over this game. he had an in game wife lmao

[@Gfmjones]

Lol no way mama was serious ?? Lol

[@Sporkonafork1]

my mom did divorce my dad because of this game.

[@ravenone6001]

@@Sporkonafork1 I'm hoping this is a joke and I'm sorry if it isn't but that's hilarious

[@mrswolls]

Lmao are you serious

[@erikhendrickson59]

lmao

[@shibascream6851]

This is insane. I knew you! I remember Twolves, Soulzero, etc. as well. I was Kidagakash from Midgardsomr. I was totally addicted. I think I started in the fall of 2004 and played constantly to 2008, then was on and off from 2008 - 2010.

[@RandoomDude]

amazing, just all being on the same server and recognizing each other

[@Trotskers]

I started playing this game when I was 13, my older brother and sister played it. They lived with my mom so I only got to play it on Wednesday nights and every other weekend. After I got to about level 10, which at 13 and only being able to play for such limited time frames took forever, I started skipping school to stay at my mom's house and play it. Then my dad got it for me and I was hooked. That summer I stayed home every single day playing it. When I was 15 I ended up dropping out of high school entirely and devoted most of my time to playing FFXI. I was also a devoted musician, and would spend a lot of time playing drums, but not nearly as much time as I'd spend on FFXI. I would wake up at some time in the afternoon and log on, without brushing my teeth, without taking a shower, without eating breakfast. I'd go at least 4-5 hours before doing anything else, finally I'd go out and make myself some breakfast and head straight back. I'd stay up all night until the sun came up, my dad would wake up and head off to work, and I'd stay up grinding levels in Valkurm Dunes, Qufim, Kazham, Garliage Citadel, Crawler's Nest, Quicksand Caves, etc. I'd stay up until I literally could not keep my eyes open for another second. I think a big issue was the fact that in a good party if you even left to get a drink or take a piss, you'd set back the party significantly. God forbid if you had to make a sandwich, take a shit, or answer the door, those were things you'd have to full on leave a party over just so you didn't upset people and get a bad reputation. Luckily I have extremely bad A.D.D, so I get bored very quickly. For most things, it'll take about a month. Like right now I've been playing Rainbow Six Siege since it launched around Thanksgiving and I'm already getting quite bored of it. FFXI was different, it would take me years to get bored of it, but then I'd easily be able to quit. I'd end up going back, though, I only just finally hung it up for good last year. 11 years of my life, off and on, that game was involved in. Looking back, I don't regret it. Listening to the Ronfaure music and picturing myself running around killing sheep, orc, beetles, and rabbits as a slew of different advanced jobs. Some of the most fun I had on that game was the joy and anticipation of unlocking a new advanced job that I was really excited about and leveling it up, learning the new abilities... People say endgame is the real game, but for me just leveling up in FFXI was some of the most fun I ever had in a game. I suppose I got lucky because at my most hardcore I was living with my father and I didn't have any responsibilities so my real life was hardly existent in the first place, nothing to really ruin there. I also got lucky in that those bad decisions I made in my teen years didn't ruin my young adult life, I'm 24 now and have managed to do well for myself despite wasting a few of my teen years on that game. Hell, maybe it even helped me in some weird way. There are a lot of lessons learned in that game, it was challenging, you had to be determined, you had to have work ethic and drive, you had to be good at your job and prepared (geared well). Some could say it provided a lot of great life lessons that helped me. Some could also say that it set me back quite a bit. Maybe a bit of both. Thanks for making this video man, I was going to some withdrawals, which is sort of depressing in and of itself considering this game really isn't there anymore, just a shell of it's former self, if it were still structured the way it was in 2009 I suppose I'd install it and play it for a few months. Anyway, I ended up on this video because I was missing the game, and hearing you talk about your time on it not only helped me out but it also warmed my heart to remember the game in the great way that you detailed it. Take care.

[@PuppyFanclubNZ]

Nasomi is a free server set to the 2005 era... I got hooked again :(

[@dgb921]

Jonjey Comms youre gay

[@lerbagge]

I would rather eat a tennisball!

[@loopiedoodle5574]

lmao tf are these comments

[@davereeves1967]

You just described me, except I was 20, had an incredible job and a great girlfriend, both of which I ultimately threw away to this mindfuckingly great game in the 2000s. It's still pretty great, hardly a shell of itself. It's just easier to get to endgame now. The old grind has been replaced with multiple enjoyable grind paths. The end of the path is still as difficult as ever. Probably the only MMO that doesn't drop an AoE hitbox to let you know where not to be when you shouldn't be there, still.

[@alexl7219]

I used to get response from japanese players "No Thanks" "Japanese Only" when I was looking for parties.

[@mf-h3659]

i thought this said panties and i was like 'no way thats true'

[@jkytest1]

"meat" "shield"

[@jamesbond8540]

HappyConsoleGamer: “online addiction is a destroyer of worlds” Mark Zuckerburg: “welcome to the metaverse”

[@DriftyG]

I still have withdraws from this game... in fact that's how I got to this video...

[@EggsForDessert]

You and me both. Especially after a shitty day at work

[@xxHB311xx]

+Driftwood Gaming i listen the music of this game every day , i dont play it anymore cause i had a big big addiction , to it more than 2 years of real GAME PLAY TIME and not afk play time , so i can get the memories from the music but avoiding the adicction of playing it

[@Trotskers]

+Driftwood Gaming Same.

[@xskramx8078]

withdrawals ? come on dude , you don't ...have you ever been through a drug withdrawal ? not nice

[@choux8372]

steven tipton mental health issues can affect your body in harmful ways, too, you know

[@anon7596]

The early days memories with XI will never be forgotten, and can't be replicated. That first run to Jueno. Waiting hours for my katana to be forged. Spending weeks fighting all the summons with carbuncle. Seriously FFXI was one of a kind. So [gather together Burn down San D'oria]

[@pasymath6157]

Jay CFC awe man so true, just getting to Juno was such great reward and exciting.

[@tassonenicholas]

Jay if you want to relive any of that... consider Nasomi server. look it up. I was so disappointed with newer MMOs and disgusted with how retail FFXI is today that I looked for other options. Best choice. captures the golden age of FFXI very well. look me up in game. Xionrasere on there.

[@joshuaherrera8085]

Nick T Can i transfer my current character to that server or is it private?

[@kuramakun84]

Running to Jeuno from San doria and getting raped by a tiger in Batalliq downs lol

[@mmq9886]

Yup thought you could be sneaky by hiding from the sight of the tigers but too bad they aggro sound :(

[@michaelkennedy3749]

FF XI was the greatest MMO ever. I know your feeling.

[@fredrikjonsson5429]

word!

[@mricf4961]

yes it was

[@mickael7878]

so sad we all had to move on one day :( I miss my old linkshell

[@Justuas]

It still is.

[@JacketCK]

you know ffxi still has a big community right? im still playing and the biggest servers have 2000 to 5000 players every day

[@jakeol3937]

My account getting hacked saved me from this game.... thank you whoever you are!

[@MrDro1128]

Whiplash?

[@Aeon373]

You're welcome

[@Xyos212]

I had a friend who got into WOW, and it LITERALLY became his life. All his time after work was WOW. Because of that all he could talk about was WOW, he had a mundane job, so conversations with him were awkward and weird since I didnt play the game. We eventually stopped being friends, and to this day he's still like that with either WOW, or other RPG's. I think for some people, those kind of games can be a "life substitute", time filling thing to do to take their minds off their real life. Nothing wrong with those games in moderation, but 6-8 hours a day is not healthy. Glad you overcame it dude!

[@EastyyBlogspot]

Xyos212 i was the same i played it a lot maxed my character but then the realization hit me....the game was actually not that good i was addicted to the whole social aspect and grinding but if you took the gameplay and stuck it into a single player enviroment the gameplay was pretty poor

[@delatroy]

Xyos212 Wasn't there a story in Korea about a couple starving their newborn to death due to neglect that they were playing WOW? MMOs for whatever reason seems to illicit genuine addiction. In Korea it's also routine to see game addiction medical clinics and gameing in internet cafes are banned past 12 midnight nationwide.

[@Xyos212]

delatroy I think it depends on your situation, and yes that did happen in Korea. If someone just lost their job or is depressed, or sad about something in their life/self, MMO's I think can act as a time filler to take their mind off life and responsibility. I think as humans, we need goals and to feel like were accomplishing something. When someone has no job, or no prospects in life, I assume MMO's can kind of fill that need in a small way.

[@VortexThePrime]

Xyos212 This is very true, it helps you feel like you're being productive even if the opposite is true.

[@Xyos212]

Prime productive is the perfect word. Everyone wants that legit feeling, and MMO's can offer that feeling to someone who has nothing else going on in life.

[@Zorvax]

I've watched this video like 20 times over the last couple years, you're such a great storyteller. I felt like I was living it lol, great video I had to finally comment.

[@lesbianmareep]

I've done the same! It's just such a fun story and I love listening to people talk about FFXI. It's just perfect.

[@Zorvax]

@@lesbianmareep Right? It's like I'm feeling the nostalgia through him haha.

[@coolnightskate]

There’s Something about his story that makes it sound like the most immersive and satisfying video game experience, while at the same time sounding like an inescapable nightmare.

[@Gevsterz]

It's amazing how close your story parallels my own. I destroyed my life for 3-1/2 years and loved every moment playing XI. XI's addiction is founded upon how difficult it was, the social bonds it demands, and the absolutely insane patience it required. Ultimately, its all about chasing the dragon. sometimes literaly. That dopamine response of accomplishment through all the long hardships. At one point, I waited 6 or 7 hours to get a party to level my samurai while I played on my handheld psp periodically checking on my pc screen for an invitation. When I quit, I was so incredibly depressed, I bought myself a xbox360 and 10 games just to keep my mind at bay. Dont let anyone tell you gaming isn't a real addiction. The brain's reward has no prejudice. I've since played WoW for 8 years and still struggle with addiction but at a reduced level. That mmo is much more casual and kinder; albeit the hook is still there. Still, I earned so many great memories and friends in both games.

[@BeefJurfy]

Ive been a drunk for about 12 years. I have quit off, and on over the past 4 years. The way you describe your XP with this game (no pun intended) makes so much sense to me. I lost a few jobs because of my issues with alcohol, and drugs as well. I find you to be an inspiration when it comes to something like this. I can see your passion for the game, and yet I can also see the hate for it which is something I am to familiar with. I am a gamer as well. Point is your story inspires me, and I can relate in a way. Thank you for that.

[@WhiteDeathOrchestra]

I played FFXI from 2004 to 2010, most intensely between 2006-2010 where I was literally playing more than 16 hours a day most of the time. I would not talk to anyone outside the game and I would only break to eat or use the bathroom. When I was forced to quit in 2010 I had a playtime of 706 days and some change. I had 10 jobs to at least 75, as the cap had been recently raised to 80 and most of the best gear before the level cap was raised. I met some of my best friends in that game. After 5 years being away from it, not a day goes by that I don't reminisce of the life I had on FFXI and the only regret I have is that I don't still live in Vana'diel.

[@wolfgangusbanana93]

Holy sh$t you put almost 2 years of your life in a game?? That's insane haha, games are cool, but also other things. Hope you doing well man!

[@genericyoutubeuser8957]

How are you doing these days?

[@Darmalarm777]

You were on Midgardsormr!? I remember Twolves and Amara from your screenshots, they were in my guild for quite a while. I remember seeing your character, and Soulzero and Jspaceman as well, the community was so small you got to recognize characters.

[@HappyConsoleGamer]

Darmalarm777 Whoa small world!!

[@Darmalarm777]

HappyConsoleGamer Sorry to hear about your addiction issues with the game by the way. I think a lot of us (myself included) were addicted to 11 on some level, back then.

[@VortexThePrime]

HappyConsoleGamer I was on Midgardsormr as well. o.o I thought the handle EvilSerge looked rather familiar. I probably saw you running around. I was Larq an Elvaan Paladin for awhile and then I rerolled as a Hume named Raruri, also a Paladin. Small world indeed. o.o

[@soul2xzero]

Prime How awesome!! I was Soulzero. Amara was an amazingly wonderful lady and Jspaceman was my number 1 fishing partner. What was your name on there Darma? And just to put it out there. Feel the Serge!

[@peterhapers]

HappyConsoleGamer Johnny, thank you for this video. I work as a therapist with people with game-addictions (also drugs and alcohol-addictions). I can show this video to the (young) people with game-addictions so that they realise that they are not alone with these problems and you can retake your life. thank you!

[@Akihiko169]

Keep rewatching this from time to time, what a great story on game addiction. Thank you John, you are wonderful guy.

[@vain_x]

I'm dealing with this currently with FF14, I'm missing out on great games/friends/life because I just won't let go of 14. I'll probably re-watch this again sometime to try to motivate myself, thank you!

[@obZen327]

Why??? 14 is a pos WoW clone...

[@NewCanadianTurtle]

This is honestly one of the darkest videos I've ever seen on this channel, and one of my favourites. I love how honest Johnny is. I've never really been addicted to a game to that extent, however I did have this odd experience when I was playing Tetris. I was so concentrated on the game, and it was just satisfying to clear 4 rows of tetriminos with that one "long" block. So after shutting off the game, I'd still have the game playing in my head for some reason. While I was doing anything (eating, shitting, watching tv, etc), I'd imagine blocks falling in front of my view and I'd be clearing out lines in my head. It actually got me a bit freaked out. It lasted only a week, after that I guess I just gassed out on the game and I stopped imagining the blocks coming down

[@Agumon5]

Same here, love how honest and transparent he is being here. I had a very similar experience. I almost failed my senior year of high school when FFXI released. Finished with a 2.3 GPA.

[@KattReen]

I think any tetris-head has that experience with tetris. ;P

[@AmbeyPhantom]

It's nice knowing other people had/have this problem, my dad was very very addicted to this game, about the same or even worse so than you had it. It got so bad that he lost friendships and pretty much his family, job, money and other things. I wish he could've gotten help back then, and had people like you to talk to. My dad had other heavy addictions and it really does make sense that this was just one of them that he couldn't quit and a few years ago he lost his life due to alcoholism. Long story short, I feel that many other people had/have the same kind of addictions and really could need the right people to help them out of it. I still love this game so dearly, it was apart of my life mostly because thats how I was able to spend time with my dad and I loved playing as well, but I do get this bitter sweet feeling of the game being like a bad drug that tore his life apart. I just wanted to thank you for your story, and I hope other people can be as strong as you are to have the will power to stop and move on. :)

[@johnbrennan2988]

+AmbeyPhantom Thanks for sharing hey

[@Sporkonafork1]

Got this game in 2011 after my parents divorced over this and a few other marraige-enders. This was the only way I'd bond with my dad before I quit in 2012, started again in 2017, quit, then started new again.

[@N3rd_House]

You're goddamn right you loved it! XD FFXI isn't an MMO like WoW is. FFXI is an experience. One you will never have again, or will ever replicate with another game.

[@Krucifus]

Indeed, It seems like every other MMO is a race to endgame and its all about the destination, whereas FFXI was about enjoying the entire journey there.

[@KensashMitsurugi]

Yes Final Fantasy XI was life, and we were good at it. I stopped in 2012, I do not regret my time in XI. I play FFXIX now but I balanced my life and Gaming.

[@Magdalena287]

I started on ps2 as a teenager and I have to tell you this is the only game I've ever played that I actually smashed my keyboard, like pieces everywhere. It was so frustrating yet so fun at the same time. O hat, azuran fists, bcnm's, dynamis are all things that just bring back so many memories. I remember the Japanese players just being insane back in the day, I would do merit parties with them when I hit 75 rdm and they would let me join their JP only parties and I would always try to ask them in broken Japanese how they would party 8 hours straight with out restroom breaks. My husband and I started playing again last year, and the changes they made are amazing. I could never go back to the original game now as a wife and mother so i'm glad they have made it more user friendly.

[@calypsohandjack9278]

JP ONRY

[@Magdalena287]

@@calypsohandjack9278 the best ones were "sorry i dont speak english" in english lol

[@spicyjuniormint]

I'm laughing my ass off at the pictures you took of the TV with the game installing! I've been waiting for this episode for so long, ever since you and Pete Dorr had your famous (and famously drawn out) conversation about your addictions on the AGG podcast. Thanks for telling your story, glad you overcame your addiction!

[@donnyyasu2764]

FFXI was a very unique beast. As successful as WoW is, and as good of a game FFXIV is, they are not what FFXI was. If you never played it, you would never understand the grind it was, how punishing yet rewarding the game was. Even people who quit with stories like these, still manage to look back with a fondness despite what damage it did to a part of their life. FFXI was a great time for 7 years of my life. I still keep in touch with people I played XI with, met up with some of them, and no other game ever has been able to make bonds like that.

[@cloud3332]

look into ffxi nasomi

[@eji]

Aw man, I understood all of this way too well. I was also on MIdgardsomr (name was Gaddes) and think I remember seeing you on there back in the day... but yeah it was a really brutal game back then before the Abyssea expansion. Cruel drop rates, people fighting each other camping NMs. I was younger so I was able to allocate waaaay too much time to the game, to the point where my dad got pissed that I was constantly playing it. Around 2009 when the server merged into Quetzacotl, a lot of people in my LS had dropped off, so it was actually pretty lucky since that made it easier for me to spend less time on the game to the point where I was able to wean myself off it within a couple months. Then Abyssea and the 99 cap came out and when I realized how much work it would be to level up to 99 and all the gear that had taken me years to acquire would be obsolete, THAT was the thing that really helped make it easy for me to permanently stay away from the game. Once in a while, when the free-login weeks occur, I might log in just to wander around... but all the old zones are so dead and I never got up to speed about the new stuff, so I usually just visit my favorite spots briefly and then log out. I'll never fully return to it, but perhaps once a year during free-login I like to see what used to be. The music, the ambience, the art design... it was a really remarkable game.

[@Arcanua]

+Eji :o I might've seen you what's your chara's name? I play on Quetz.

[@eji]

+Arcanua the Red Mage It was Gaddes, I was an elvaan, used to be part of the smallish LS called Mattet

[@Arcanua]

Eji I'm an Elvaan :3 But my type are going extinct we now say most are male...if it's female it's most likely someone's alt x'D

[@PuppyFanclubNZ]

Then don't start on Nasomi. Free, private server set to the year 2005... it hooked me again :(

[@SussellXS]

I was wondering is this was Midgar. I remember a taru named Woogark!

[@alvianfarrel1158]

somehow from your story, make me really want to play the game lol

[@stephenmystery8313]

+Alvian Farrel The PS2 servers shut down a couple weeks ago.

[@stephenmystery8313]

susubeardehart Yes, it will continue on PC as usual and is still fairly popular.

[@Pettorax]

+susubeardehart Yes the game is still up. The server named Asura has the highest population now a days.

[@alvianfarrel1158]

+GamerPett i play ffxiv because of this vids XD

[@Pettorax]

+Alvian Farrel I've been playing FFXIV off and on since it originally launched. ARR is a lot better than the original.

[@moonkeis]

FFXI was my first MMO, and yep...I was hooked on this during my college years. I'm not even sure how I was able to pass my classes after being up until 4-5 AM in the morning camping or in a Exp PT. Good times though, I made some great friends that I still keep in touch with to this very day.

[@CodeRadGames]

Thank you for sharing your experience. I got FFXI when I was 14 years old at 2004. I was going through this addiction as well. The problem was that I didn't know what was happening to me, and the game was just so much better then real life. I ended up playing the game for 5 years nearly everyday. I would finish school, and just rush home and play until I had to sleep. Sometimes I would farm NMs and stay up all night because of the spawning. My playtime was over a year. I finally managed to break the addiction by moving to different country and starting to study at university. Because of this game I missed most of my teenage years, but at the same time it was one of the best times of my life. This game was huge part of my life. I didn't know other people experienced this as well.

[@caliban5505]

I love this story Johnny. You are such a gifted storyteller, and this makes me feel so nostalgic and caught up in the time even though I've never played the game.

[@bglover2407]

I know this is an older video but I just came across it in 2022. Thank you for your testimony!!!! This is a serious topic that is not discussed and pushed under the rug. Addiction comes in many forms all are destructive! Peace to you Happy! And thanks again! From a recovering addict.

[@godlessandlovingit]

I lost my life playing this too... best 3 years ever.

[@JamotHica]

Wow, it really does feel surreal watching a fellow old FFXI player talk about his experiences. I can relate so much to the addiction (the game was my LIFE for a long time), but none of the few real friends I had even knew about the game!

[@aidanb4477]

Had a brief experience with game addicition as a junior in HS when I got Breath of the Wild for Christmas. Started playing it that day, took some time in the evening to spend with my family, and then started playing again. And I didn't stop until 6 in the morning. Then I'd wake up at 3 PM, and play until 6 AM, rinse repeat for about two weeks. Thankfully, I was involved in a lot of music stuff at school so I never would've been able to let it become that big of a problem, but I was seriously addicted for a couple weeks. 16 hours a day, barely stopping to eat, when I'd finally go to bed I would dream about the game, wondering what new adventures awaited me. One of the greatest gaming experiences in my life, but definitely one of the scarier ones as well.

[@BlackClawJimmy]

Thanks so much for making this video. It rang to me pretty hard as I too remember this strange addiction that in a way also saved my life. I moved out to the boonies when I was 13 around the time XI was coming out. I too was on PSO at the time however soon wanted to switch over to what would be this amazing open world, like stated. It was then that I spent years absorbed in this game that got me through highschool and made me feel less alone than I was, being a city kid in upstate NY. Thank you so much, this video really hit home.

[@RaymondChia_Silaqui]

This is a serious chapter of my life. Some of my best friends are from this game. I have attended Weddings and Funerals. Still brings a tear to my eyes when I think back about it.

[@timcrouch2415]

Wow, it is some 10 years later from the time I quit playing, and just seeing these screen shots again...I feel it. There is something about that world that feels so good to be in, more so than any other MMORPG I played, from WoW to EQ to EQ2 to Vanguard, etc. Their worlds were all just backdrops for playing a game. But Vanadiel (FFXI's world) felt like a real world to live in.

[@Clouds12012]

oh my god!! I HAD THE EXACT EVERYTHING YOU EXPLAINED IN THE VIDEO!! The addiction, the guild/linkshell, the friends, the job situation, ignoring girls, job went out of business, I was a drk, caveman like months indoors, the room setup, the beard, the withdraw, even the snacks! every detail in this video was done by me when i played 11 too. only differance was i was on a laptop instead. Your exp mirrored mine exactly

[@beerious8392]

Video game addiction is quite real. But trust me, it's alot better than booze and drugs.

[@randalthor6872]

nice Alex Grey profile pic : ) And I agree!

[@User2jn]

MMO addiction also taught me how to read because I would have to read quests, menus and write to other players.

[@Dirk93]

This is a similar experience that I had with FFXIV ARR I would play that game all day and night and when I was offline and went somewhere I'd talk to my online friends on the phone about the game and what we're going to do with our clan and whenever I had friends over all I could ever talk about was that game and I was addicted to it for over 2 years and now I'm taking a step back from it, I still play it time to time but I try not to play it as often as I used to

[@midnitdragoon]

Man.... Final fantasy xiv sucksssssss compared to 11

[@GreenNinjaTea]

Am I a Sadist for coming back to this video a lot ( ._.) ?

[@Ene-Chan]

Its facinating how could you not

[@mrmuyrapido]

Wow man what a story! I always wondered how people could get so addicted to games to the point of sickness but it makes sense hearing how all those circumstances stacked up. I think a big part of it these days is also feeling like you need to keep up with your crew in these games. It’s not just for your own enjoyment but also you’re kind of depended on to stick with it. Thanks for sharing and I’m really glad you got over it eventually!

[@josealqueres]

That's the best story I've heard about game addiction so far. That's so crazy! Thank you for sharing!

[@KappoJK]

Amazing game, so many memories. My first MMORPG. With such time consuming gameplay, I can understand how it would be easy to get completely sucked in. I played for about six years all together, while maintaining full time employment and a social life. I was incredibly tired and sleep deprived for the first couple years, but I learned better time management and was able to keep it together. It was just a matter of self control for me. As much as I would have loved to resolve myself into Vanadiel, I still had real life goals and aspirations to work on. I no longer play any MMOs now, because I simply don't have the time to dedicate to them, and I have never found one that grabbed me the way FFXI did. I'm glad you were able to overcome your addiction to the game, and I hope you still have some fond memories of the experience, even though it lead to such a hardship for you.

[@AdorableAree]

I started playing this game when it came out and left when 14 was out. I was so addicted and decided to finally just sell my character so I can get on with rl. I was able to sell my account for $1500 US. I even met my husband on there 11 yrs ago and we still to this day talk about ffxi and how amazing it was! We were in Bahamut server and took endgame serious with our LS. I had to buy the soundtrack not only because the music is amazing but when you listen to each song you remember the stuff you did in that zone. I tried to join 14 but it was not the same. I even went back to ffxi as a new character and it was not the same it was empty. Which is good or I would still be on there lol If they do make another game online I will be joining again. Hopefully I bump into old friends and make some new ones too! Thanks for the video! -Aree from Bahamut server

[@MathcoreIndex]

Thank you for sharing your experience, I don't see many people talking about their experience with this game, but there's an underlying theme with those who do that is very relatable

[@kalaknuan1845]

A year late but thnx for sharing this amazing story, it got some of my own memories from those days back. I almost shared a tear of enjoyment or was it the feeling of missing some great adventures with friends?¿? Till this day i dont play any MMO because i'm not sure if i am able to escape the grasp again, it truly is like real-life drugs. . . sad but true. . . So again BIG thnx for doing this video, it did let me taste the sweet sweet flavour yet again though your and mine own memories. Best regards from a new subber.

[@ryanhuck4071]

FFXI was truly legendary. I don't blame you for having this addiction.

[@SeanVirgo5]

Oh My God!! You are telling my story... I was so addicted I almost lost my job, killed a relationship, gained almost 100lbs, and I still can't touch my old rig like you have it on the table. I still have a crate of folders I was just getting into blue mage and puppet master. I had to quit cold turkey. I immediately started to travel, study photography, and build my life back. It was real addiction. I also had to cut of my online friends in real life. I still get goosebumps when I see FF XI term like AFK and WC in real life. I'm so glad to find this video... And know it wasn't just me.

[@ronh1850]

Amazing video, thanks for sharing! I had an eerily similar experience with Everquest. Two years of my life (and my wife's) was consumed by that game. Quitting was one of the hardest things I've ever done in my life, to this day. Still, some of those most amazing memories and fantastic experiences occurred in that digital realm, with what felt like very real friends. I don't regret it, nor would I like to repeat it. What a paradox! I also played FFXI and it was an amazing experience as well... however, nothing matches the pull of your first MMORPG (EQ in my case)…

[@IllyianSilverheart]

You've had a few comments now regarding this, but watching this video really hit home for me. In retrospect, my addiction for this game was insane. And like your moment getting the bracelet, I too had my moments (I managed to pry Ochiudo's Kote from Mee Deggi's cold, dead hands). Hell, if I close my eyes right now, I can perfectly envision the game and can walk from Bastok to San d'Oria from memory alone. I still listen to the music on my phone because as you said it was beautiful. I finally said goodbye forever a couple years back after hopping in for a bit to complete some unfinished business. I completed the Rise of the Zilart and Chains of Promathia storylines in their entirety from help from a friend and the newly updated level caps. And it just. It was over, finally. No regrets. But it's scary how much that game took over my life for periods at a time. In any case, good for you for being able to sever the cord.

[@HoldenReviews]

How would you compare quitting this addiction to quitting your old addition to smoking? I think that would be a very interesting comparison that you being a person who has been addicted and quit both could answer.

[@NuntiusGris]

That would be a very interesting thing to hear, indeed!

[@Vacuumscam]

+HoldenReviews I have also quit both, for me, cigarettes was the hardest thing I ever did. The MMO I was addicted to (WoW) went shitty, which made it pretty easy to quit. Now, years later, I don't miss either, whatsoever.

[@HoldenReviews]

Vacuumscam Thank you for your personal insight on the matter.

[@gemreivews]

He has tons of addictions. Smoking. Collecting old games. His place has a hoarder kind of look. It's the personality

[@ffxivfingolfin]

+HoldenReviews you cant really compare a video game addiction to an actual drug addiction ...i have dealt with both ^^ it wasnt easy for me to quit ffxi and i went back like 3 times ^^ on 3 different characters ... but quitting drinking after 20 years was way harder :)

[@VeggieGamer]

First off, that is an amazing t-shirt ;) Secondly, awesome work on this video. I get the impression it is even though for you to tell this story. I don't think I have ever gotten to that point with a game, but when I get a new FF game it tends to dominate all my free time until I finish and max it (I am still able to work, but I basically do nothing else but play it the moment I get home). Also Skyrim, which basically become my life for sooooo long! I have even recently started a 3rd playthrough for my KZbin Channel. I guess I am lucky that MMOs just aren't my thing. I played FF14 but didn't get hooked. Again, great story and well done on getting over your addiction!!

[@peculiar]

Man, thanks for sharing your story on here. I can totally relate to your experiences on the game. I played it for almost 10 years (I don't even want to guess what my playtime must have been) and was a linkshell leader for the majority of that time. I don't know what it was about the game, but it definitely got hold of you once you started playing it.

[@Xbob42]

A bit late to the party, but thanks for sharing your story on this video. I've always enjoyed online games, I was like you, PSO and then to FFXI. But I've never been super addicted to them, so when I hear about it from people who have been, it's so bizarre and alien to me, but I'm glad to hear of these stories. With your smoking addiction as well, it sounds like it's something you've had to overcome in more than one facet of your life, and I'm glad to hear you did. Even at my most intense moments of online gaming, I'd still get urges to go out, take a walk around the block, do something to get away from the game for a little while and reset myself. I guess I'm glad to have that sort of built-in safety net.

[@LunaticTheGame]

I had a Dragon Quest IX addiction for 15 days. I played it 6 hours everyday

[@918Giaden]

Yup, you pretty much hit home with this game. Though I'm sure other MMOs hit other peoples hearts just as much, but for me it is FFXI. I was on Midgar. myself and I am still playing almost 12 years later. The longest time I've been away from this game was only a month. I met my wife on this game and today we still play it. Although we aren't into it as much as we were, but there is still a addiction to the game that will always been with us. And I'm sure, even after the game has been shut down and i'm 90 years old, i'm going to have a small part of me wanting to still play this game. What i believe it to be, is a self worth of accomplishment. Doing something together, in front and around people. With friends and even family. Making those goals, gear and even Gil, that you set out to obtain and actually accomplishing it, is truly a huge high.

[@rorytaylor626]

I had many of the same experiences as you. A bunch of people from gaming forums (remember those?) as well as my live in girlfriend at the time all got the game for PS2 at the NA launch. I had never played an MMO before and it was amazing. The sense of feeling like an insignificant piece of a vast world was really something. I remember venturing out from the familiar and safe Ronfaure Forest into La Theine Plateau for the first time felt almost overwhelming and scary. I'll probably never get that feeling again from a game. The feeling of community and the sense of accomplishment from reaching modest goals is something that I don't think developers would even attempt again in this era of instant gratification. Really fond memories of this one.

[@CBAnthony1]

What a great video. Watched it two years after it was made but completely identified. Really great description!

[@SkepticalChris]

It's those Tarutaru... . They're pint sized cuteness ensnares you into the game.... Their little cutesy emotes, their panic dances.... It all gets you to stay...

[@Arcanua]

+Skeptical Chris That and our Tarutaru

[@amazonmanonthemoon1250]

>> punts the tarutaur football.

[@KieronWolf]

I remember spending my entire summer break no lifing my RDM from 1-75 when i was 15. It was so worth it.

[@picantepollo6238]

I watched this video when you uploaded this years ago, came back because this video stood out in my memory when I started reminiscing about this game like I always do. Your body language when you talk about this game is crazy, I can relate. Scary to think you only played for 3 months.. I started playing at PS2 release, carried onto 360, and quit in November 2008. Still wish I can do it all over again because I did love every second of it, but probably show some restraint and not feel like I have to get every job to 75. Definitely wasn't necessary I could have used my time a lot better.

[@nickmcc9143]

Wow. I needed to hear this. I played from 2004 - 2008, and I played incessantly. I really enjoyed playing, but so much of my young adult life was spent on FFXI and not with my family, friends, exploring myself and my art... I definitely feel guilty for having played as much as I did and not building up myself in RL. I feel you as a fellow PS2 FFXI player! Thank you for making this video!

[@gabrielmontreuil]

I miss Split Screens... :( Online gaming is Fun... But when the Servers or Connections have problems... Well you cant play them... Plus Split Screens or Multiplayer Local make it more Fun to play with Actual Friends in the same room as you are in... It Depresses me when i saw a PS4 Update that was saying... "Now you can play with Friends like if they were in the same room as you!"

[@MetalTiger88]

gabriel montreuil jup i totally agree, back in the day every "racing game" (other games aswell) had a split screen mode, nowadays everything is online multiplayer only wich sucks if a friend comes over... what are you gonna do? bring a second console, tv and copy of the same game with you, just to play against each other over the internet? that is stupid =(

[@gabrielmontreuil]

MetalTiger88 ***** Yeah Online Gaming is good for PC games. But on Console... It kind of Killing the Experience of gather around and play with Friends... Even if i dislike Nintendo nowadays... They are the only console that marketed to Both Online and Local Multiplayer...

[@markasscop]

***** i actually played ctr w/ some friends not too long ago

[@gabrielmontreuil]

markasscop Arev I never really played CTR but alot of people told me it was as Good as the Mario Kart on N64. :) Crash used to be awesome... RIP Bandicoot.. I wish they would bring him back in Smash or Playstation All-Star or something! lol

[@gabrielmontreuil]

***** DIDDY KONG RACING..... press start... lol

[@Nightweaver1]

Also wowwww, taking flash photos of a CRT TV with a digital camera next to a display of Jill Valentine. Now THAT'S early 'aughts.

[@BarrettMK22]

Great vid man. So much of it rings true with me. Thnx for sharing. I miss ffxi a lot. Ive been away for 3 years now. Great memories.

[@Skyshadow733]

Wow man I can relate to so many points you have about this game...the depth and the difficulty...the music ( especially ) the friends and exploring. I was also dark knight and couldnt wait to get my AF armor and more. Your story about getting the ring from the slime literally same thing happened to me, in Ordelle caves vs all the BOTS. Honestly I get anxiety when you start talking about the moment you quit. I was a bit younger than you I was about 17 or 18 when I started and I did the exact same things you mentioned thru out my play time...I would wake up just to play the game, play all day (eat a quick dinner) then back to playing till 2am or so...fresh out of high school living at home so no big responsibilitys...all my time went to the game I went on this way untill I was about 21-22 and I finally got burnt out and had to move on with my life. My game play time was way over 400 days with not much afk time in there. I look back and same as you, feel the joy and giddyness of playing the game but also the negative aspects of it, how it really put my life on pause. Anyways thanks for sharing your story im glad I found the vid and see there were more people like me out there ;P

[@DarkmanXSincere]

Sounds bad but I wish I could could find a MMO that could give me this addiction feeling again like ffxi did when I was 14.

[@apathy5218]

look up nasomi private server.

[@DarkmanXSincere]

+Apathy is there any possible way to play on a private server on a XboxOne or Ps4? Say putting the downloaded torrent on a usb drive and then opening it on the console?..

[@Tetsu9701]

Will Echevarria there's a game called Pantheon: Rise of the Fallen that's more like Everquest than ffxi but it's specifically catering to the old skool mmorpgs games where u don't just quest thru all levels and fly to end game. Dying is going to end penalized, the world will be tough you need to group up. I think fast travel will be limited so as not to make the world seems small

[@Amocoru]

Nah it doesn't sound bad. All hardcore MMO players are hurting for that next fix

[@risseer23]

I had a unhealthy addiction with a Ps2 game called Everquest Online adventures would spend nothing less than 10 hours a day then grind 48 hours to lvl up my ranger as fast as i could.

[@EggsForDessert]

I spent years playing this game, maybe 4 years and a total play time of around 380 days from what I remember. I still miss this game and the 'adventures' I had. How sad is that? Now I'm married and a qualified teacher but I miss playing this game because console games don't hold my interest like this did. Lack of progression and social features make them feel lifeless. Like you I hated myself at times for playing it but I even after quitting I feel like I want that experience again but I'm too worried about being sucked back into that world as it would destroy my life.

[@joseruizjimenez5578]

Thanks for sharing this. I also played and love FFXI so much... lots of years and so many adventures "lived" there. Was hard to cut, I did a comeback, enjoyed it again and then said goodbye selling the account. I don't regret the time spent there but I will always warn people about this. I think this addiction effect was like D&D for kids 10 years older than us. And in that regard, young generation these days don't get much attraction from MMORPG games as before, but new addictions replaced and will replace them (MOBA for example). The back story is the same, enjoy those games but help the community warning young players. Thanks!

[@ryogo666]

Wow what a story! I've never played FFXI but I could FEEL the pleasure you had through your addiction! I was a huge Final Fantasy fan back when this was released (and still am to some degree), but I always wanted my games to have an actual ending. It was hard for me to NOT play it, and still is as I feel I've missed something outstanding in my favorite series...

[@Bliced]

Welcome to the NHK, MMO addiction. That was you 110% haha omg. Scary stuff though.

[@denshahime]

Bliced Hikikomori-Power

[@cookiesontoast9981]

Bliced Fucking love NHK, one of my favourite anime/manga ever.

[@TallTrash]

Your one of the lucky ones. Been playing mmorpgs since I was around 9 or 10. Still am. Basically 24/7 these past 6 years. It's gross.

[@Tiger74147]

+Steve Weaboo Jones So, how will you escape?

[@TallTrash]

Tiger74147 I won't.

[@Tiger74147]

+Steve Weaboo Jones Why not?

[@MMOStein]

+Steve Weaboo Jones "Those who say they can, and those who say they can't, are usually correct." ~Quote from a guy I can't remember but those words stuck with me for life.

[@syrindark7854]

+Steve Weaboo Jones I started playing MMOs back in 1998 starting with a game called Mankind, Then to Anarchy Online and then to WoW. There were a few points where i played a lot around 99 to 2006ish but still nothing close to most people, I mostly played because i was stuck home taking care of my Dad who had cancer at the time among other things. Honestly though i don't regret any of the time i've spent in an MMO or games in general. I've made a ton of RL lasting friends from it and i still am to this day.

[@thuaners]

thank you sharing!! i can 100% relate! i had the same level of addiction with World of Warcraft! For 4 solid years after it first came out, all i did was play it! It was an AMAZING time in my life, that i remember fondly. But i never want to do again, because it really took me away from real life! I still play these online games now, but im so casual, which is how i like to keep it eheh

[@cedeking3855]

i feel your pain, played ffxi from 04 to 09, five years...with up and down, but i know what u mean and you have got the strength to stop it in just some months, im comed back again after 7 years, just to complete a mission iv left in 2009, now everything is changed from 2004, vanadiel still there with just a bounce of ppl...iv finished the mission i was missing and feel free now from that amazing world.

[@lanfan9488]

You have inspired a morbid curiosity in me. Whelp, downloading the PC version now, let's a go!

[@PiroKUSS]

Did you get addicted? lol

[@armyxrays1978]

Great story, I went thru something similar. Almost lost my wife. Glad I was able to quit too. By the way you look like a young Diamond Dallas Paige.

[@PkolGaming]

This was the first video i watched on your channel. Thanks for sharing

[@Annihilus187]

Love this video. I am still playing it today. Such an amazing game but unfortunately it's so late now it's hard to even find people to play with.

[@JohnDoe-xh7uc]

FFXI is more than a game or an MMO. If you've played it, you already know, and between your vid and the great comments a lot of people have done it justice. Instead of adding my own nostalgia at great length, I'll address how addictive it is and a tip for anyone struggling with MMO addiction. One method to break it and avoid major withdrawal is to pick a non MMO game- any game. You're not going to want to play that instead of FFXI or the MMO, but that's normal. Start playing it, anyway. You'll eventually get into it, put the time into it, and lo and behold- that game has an ending. Once it ends, you'll feel a sense of closure and the urge for FFXI will be cut off by having gotten occupied by the other game. It's a great way to "wean" instead of struggling with cold turkey.

[@MrBKissner]

This game also ruined my life. I love it, don't get me wrong. But I can't ever go back for the same reason.

[@Poweranimal84]

Thank you for this video, I still struggle with gaming addiction in general… but nothing got ahold of my life more than online games… Ultima Online, Diablo 2 had such a grip on my life.

[@ThisIsTheTruth34]

I totally get you man, while my addiction wasn't as bad as what you went through, it consumed most of my personal life. This is still my favorite MMO and I still play them but I have learned to incorporate other things into my daily routines. But thank you for sharing your story sir.

[@anonymouspeep]

Best game if its' time. Nothing can ever compare.

[@ItzSaya]

Omg I'm gonna make a video to this too! lol Okay I'm going to continue watching the video ^_^ FFXI was my life lol I would be in class drawing the characters pretending to be playing when I was away from it... D: sick!

[@LinaaaOfficial]

Ma'Salya Conway did you ever make the video, Id be interested (also long time FFXI player)

[@hazardsurferboy]

i started this game in 2003, i ended it only recently, on and off for years. i spent thousands. i had 2 accounts. i loved everything about this game. i completely understand the addiction that had ahold of you and all of us. the music was amazing and i look back on it with extreme fondness. i would listen to it in the car still or on my iPad while doing work. the social interaction was easy, the mechanics were simple enough and the world was vast. its been a while and i still have the itch to play. i hate that i have an itch to play. i have a family of 3 kids and a wife. i want to play.... but i know all that time will take away from my life that i owe to them. its a depressing feeling when you can't fill your life with something that makes you so happy and you know means literally nothing in the real world... to anyone.... Those of you that have done the same and stuck around for way too long, that addiction is still there. its a haunting thought to think that the children growing up playing this and wow won't truly understand the impact this has on their lives. i love you all in that world, and the hole i fear will never truly close. i will always long for that game. but it is still an addiction, and as hard as it is, it needs to stop, and go away. S/N Dragonsmaster, friend: youngling, server: midgardsormr

[@mikem9674]

Hey thanks for sharing your story. I was just like you. I was setup on the floor, smoking, eating, hunched over playing on PS2. I started playing right after I got through some life crisis issues, and a broken heart and had nothing for me going on. It was an incredibly enjoyable game. I got Kraken Club from Lord of Onzozo the first time I killed it when I was lvl 70 RDM with no limit break. Everyone thought I bought the club from RMT! Lol! I also got depressed that it was taking up all my life for the 2 years I played it. However, I take away a lot from the game. I learned a lot of patience and determination from it. I was someone with no friends because I found it impossible to relate to almost everybody here in southern california who only cared about drugs cars money expensive clothes and being a celebrity. I thought there was something wrong with me until I played this game and discovered a different kind of people and connected with my kind of people. I learned a lot about myself and I try not to look at it as a sick addiction because it really wasn't. There was something in that game that was worth experiencing. Honestly, CoP was the last of it. Aght Urghan ruined the game and after that it was time to say goodbye.

[@mathieudegrandpre9279]

Your 1st big loot was an Archer's ring from Stroper Chyme in ordelles cave ;] I loved ffxi also needless to say haha

[@mathieudegrandpre9279]

It's what he's talking about at around 12min.

[@roygrinnell3638]

+Mathieu de Grandpre yeah i think he's talking about the Archer's rings haha I remember then days... and I remember farming Goobues out in the Sanctuary of ZanTah for Tree cuttings >.> For my set of haubergeon armor XD them days were glorious

[@mathieudegrandpre9279]

+Roy Grinnell Plant tree cuttings and make sapplings...right?xD

[@elp6464]

Thank you! I kept yelling ARCHERS RING hoping that he'd hear me.lol

[@mikeb6410]

Dude.. I understand this prob more then anyone. I started this game at age 14 and didn't quit until 19. I dropped out of high school because of this game. I maxed out like 7 jobs @ 75. I totally understand bro. I'll always miss it... but I had to quit as well. Eventually got a GED and went to college and it all worked out.. but it's funny because when you start the game it tells you not to let it effect your work, school, or friends and I always laughed at that, but fuck me, it effected everything.

[@MrBarbjhix]

+Mike B I'm right there with ya, Mike. This game helped end my first marriage. I was working 10-12 hour days as the main bread winner of the house and my 1st husband started playing this game. He met some chick in Idaho online and started a "relationship". Ended up leaving me for her when I discovered emails between them and confronted him. I started playing myself. I wanted to learn everything about this game that had cost me my 7 year marriage (he was 27, I was 37) and I became addicted. I also ended up on the same server he was on just to be a thorn in his side. He is not living the happy life he lived with me NOW, 9 years later. He is on this 7th relationship, barely making a living, still playing on some server and no future security.......but me, different end story. Also funny thing was, I became a better player than him, with more maxed jobs and endgame gear. I ended up meeting my 2nd husband online, I did divorce him, but we got back together last year and will marry again this year. I retired from a job at the age of 44 on disability (the one that I was working 10-12 hours at each day - it was actually a 9 hour shift) that assures that I will not have to work again and not have to worry about money because I set up my future and my income in advance. I spend tons of time on the computer either watching TV or playing various games. WoW drove me freaking nuts, SWTOR was good, but I got bored...FFXI will always be my first love and with 13 level 99s I still have tons to do in the game. But I've been pacing myself since I've been confined to a bed for the last 9 months. I can't sit in my recliner and play on my 52" screen next to my ex-hubby's 52" screen right now. I can't sit for that long. My days of 48 hour Abyssea parties are limited right now LOL

[@mikeb6410]

Wow, crazy story.. I'm sorry you're confined to your bed at such a young age, that's horrible. I hope things turn around for you. At least you are set money wise. This game just hit me at such a young age that I had to quit and get my life together. I haven't been a "multiplayer" gamer ever since really. I game everyday after work for a couple hours but pretty much single player campaigns only.. which unfortunately gets old after awhile, so I own over 300 games heh. I actually tried getting into FFXIV ARR not long ago, but it just wasn't the same for me. FFXI required soo much work and was so difficult to do anything solo, you couldn't just go explore anywhere you wanted. Something about that created so much suspense for what was coming next. I remember being a new player and seeing artifact armor for the first time and I wanted nothing more in my entire life. I wanted to know what the higher level areas and mobs looked like soo bad. What's kind of funny is, the main thing for me that hooked me was getting a great EXP party of 6 that just worked perfectly in sync with each other. I remember leveling NIN and tanking with shadows and tools and it was just fucking amazing when done correctly. Also leveling RNG, I would pull mobs perfectly and SC with another DD and the exp would just come rolling in. I LOVED a good EXP party, and now that they are virtually gone, there's no way I come back. Screw those alliance party's in Gustav. Also the friendships created in game were just unbreakable. I remember the first time my linkshell decided to go to Sky and kill the Gods, probably one of the most exciting times of my life. I got to kite Kirin as a NIN and got an osode.. I felt like such a boss! I will never forget the time I spent in that game and honestly even still hum the music in my head to this day hehe... Fenrir server here too btw.

[@MrBarbjhix]

+Mike B Well, I'm seeing a Ortho surgeon next month for the first time, I'm hoping not surgery, but my pain mgnt doc and PCP keep saying that is the next step. Funny thing is, I really didn't have a trauma to my back. I've had muscle spasms since I was 18ish, had a really bad fall in 2011 not related to my retirement disability, but over the last year it has gotten to the point that I can't stand, walk or sit for long periods. Only place position I'm "comfortable" is in bed, propped with supporting pillows - and lots of pain meds :-( At least the reason why I retired is somewhat under control, massive, debilitating migraines. I worked as an accountant, so you can see how that could effect my work. I'm also on lots of control meds to keep those under control. I'd had migraines for years and the last few years of work became so stressful and no rest from computer use that I would have crippling migraines that would last for 2 weeks or more. So, this was the 3rd round of budget cuts...oh, I worked for the government...they said, Barb this is effecting your attendance and your work, you need to retire or we fire you. I got my union involved and it turned into a disability retirement since I had enough cause to support it. My accounts are on Cerberus, I started on Kujata, when it closed I went to Hades (LMAO! Finally went to hell) then it closed and we went to Cerberus. My character name is Kyka. Funny you mention the balanced 6 party system - that is the system that truly do miss the most too. I had a static party that I leveled my WHM in and I just remember how much fun it was to know that we were going to meet every night at a certain time and that I had these 5 friends that I had forged real friendships with.....LOL and my 1st exhusband was convinced I was cybering all of them (no way, the RDM was gay!) I do enjoy the alliance parties in Abyssea, but they can get pretty mind numbing. My 2nd husband and I had been know to get into an alliance and always end up as alliance leader and party lead, then we run the party for 48 straight hours (he is retired also, he is 55). But none of them will ever compare to the 6 party system and moving to all the different party spots....I even miss the freaking Imps! Oh yes, I know what you mean by the Sky runs....my favorite memory is the time my LS fought the Archangels with a planned party wipe during the middle of the battle. As one of the main heal WHMs, I'm like WTF DO YOU MEAN PLANNED PARTY WIPE!!!!!!! But at the level we were at it was a very good strategy, and the BCNM went off without a hitch. I almost got screwed because I had moved too far out onto the plate form to heal the melees, but I've always been a sneaky mage, I did a quick raise and run LOL. I still have tons I want to do in the game, but I've been taking a break. My ex-hubby has been doing my login for the login campaigns and he sometimes levels my character or my mules - yeah, I'm OCD - I have 2 accounts, 1 main that has 13 99s and 31 mules. All the mules are leveled up to 30 on 2 jobs and everyone has max rep. BLM on all of them and a variety of job for the 2nd one.....yep I'm OCD. But during my break, I'm still involved in FFXI. I'm the only Admin left to answer questions on FFXIanswers, not that I get very many any more LOL. Okay, I've rambled enough - you can tell this is one of my favorite subjects - why FFXI is so overlooked by the gaming community IDK. It kinda irks me that WoW is the most acknowledged MMORPG gaming module. I tried, I really, really tried to play WoW, but it's quest system drove me out my of freaking mind. Go to an NPC get your quest, run back get another, run back get another, rinse repeat 50 times. SWOTOR was better but relied on using a special gaming mouse too much when I liked using a keyboard for that one. Thanks for the kind words of encouragement and I'm glad that you were able to turn your life around. Just remember, gaming isn't bad as long as you don't allow it to take over your life. I did game from 2007-2011 while I was still working and it wasn't the game that interfered with my work...trust me, it was the work and work environment!

[@mikeb6410]

Just thought I'd mention.. due to this conversation I had re downloaded FFXI ARR and am currently downloading the required updates heh. You have sparked a dangerous fire within me! But I'm strangely excited again. Thanks for that :)

[@Spoodles90]

+Mike B Dude, I started when I was 14 and stopped at 18. I thankfully squeezed out my HS diploma but it same story! I miss this game, and don't miss it all at the same time. So many good memories! -Bronn from Alexander server :)

[@TheAlternativeMind]

Everyone who played this game had these same experience. Thanks for posting this. Remembering all this made me happy.

[@IR4ndI0mIL0wIb0Ib]

Oh, man. Watched this Video so many times. Reminds me of my old Monster Hunter Days. That Journey was sooooo destructive for my life aswell. But i have so many memories of that time, i'll never forget.

[@VictorAlexanderFiltenborg]

Epic episode

[@OMGpandemic]

I'm playing an MMORPG as I watch this. Lol :p

[@orel1996]

Thank you for sharing this story. I suppose many of us have struggled with some form of addiction

[@PaulMoss7]

First time watching this episode. Brilliant, the same thing almost happened to me with Phantasy Star Online. Huge respect for talking about this.

[@eliel1815shadow]

*My addiction story is kinda different... still, is the same thing* I once had this kind of adiction but lasted 2 full years.... it was from a free online shooter for pc called Operation7, it was nuts because i played that much i got greater than 50 lvl players, and i was only lvl 12, i could take on "cashers" (its a term we used to give to players who spent meny on special weapons and bullets wich kill you instantly, yeah, microtransactions is not new) easily with my regular guns and tactics, i could get 60 kills and 5 deaths in a match... i was the best... but i hited rock bottom when the *school suspended me a full year* for not doing any homework whatsoever, at that time i knew i had a problem, but i did not quited, i kept playing because i wanted to be the best and being a proplayer who would win tournaments and grand prizes... i was so naive i was getting the best and was so frustrating becuase i reached lvl 20 (in months btw) and started to play with guys in lvl 100 and dealing with hackers, even tho i still was the best player in every match, but it stressed me the fuck out and scared me every time i played, but i couldn't quit, i was the best, and i wanted to keep it like it.... at some point i was tired (mentaly and phisicaly) and i was trying to do some other stuff, but i did not knew what, then my mom entered the room asking me to do simple chores and i ignored her, then she *tried to take the pc away from me and i got very very histerical*, my mom stared at me with horror, at that time i knew my problem was serious, how is even possible i kept playing for 2 years, how the hell i prefered to fuck my study and play instead, how the fuck i got to the point to get histerical for something so insignificant and pointless!!!..... That was it, i was done, i was addiceted to a competitive online multiplayer game that felt like punished me to get good at it. I started trying to feel that hole with other games, mostly singleplayer i had on my pc, i slowly started to get responsive for my study, family and life, then i started to see how great the feel of playing fun games were. i remember when i was freaking desesperated to leave that game but dont wanted, i told a friend of mine my account and password, and told him to change it, he never touched my account so i gave it another try, played a week or so, i tryed to remember the good times, but the most i played, the most i realized it was a piece of garbage that i conquered, the free weapons were weak and explensive in in-game cash, there was no way to keep a good fight on close combat unless you payed for a knife to use FOR DAYS, the customization system was broken, the pieces of the guns had were so unbalanced that every free gun felt like another class did not corresponded to it (an m16 felt like a submachinegun, and a sniper rifle like a pistol, for example).... in resume... it was fucking FREE2PLAY but PAY2WIN, i was so proud but so angry, and even paying to have the good stuff, the admins never NEVER banned cheaters, glitchers/buggers and hackers, so that was another problem. It was a piece of shit that i loved, finally, i could get easily away from it, never played it again... ever since then, i never got so attached to a game, and i allways aware that is a game and its not suppossed to get serious, even tho my actual friends take it serious Now im studying a career that i can specialyze in videogames development (wich is going really great btw), got a girlfriend and have the best friends ever.... man... thats freaking long, i wish i could post a potato for apologies....

[@CAwmy]

i read it,cool story thou.

[@eliel1815shadow]

Márk Simán | thank you, i hope this will get people to understand that anything on excess is bad, even videogames, and can make you do the worst things sorry for bad english tho, im learning the idiom :v

[@biscuitsthelegend1517]

Edwardo Franco no man your English is great

[@Darksparkable]

Had the best gaming time ever with this game ... and i played a lot... really ...

[@GohannTheGreat]

Its a great game, if not one of my favorite of all time. I still play to this day, but on a private server. I play with about 100 other active members on the server and we are looking for new members. (LVL 75 cap for the old time feel) Check my last video if you are interested! And hope to see you around in game -Kenziak

[@beavers789]

The way your eyes light up when you talk about it is the exact same way I get when I do. That game took over my life, I loved it more than anything. I had a period when I lost my job back in 2006 and I remember waking up at 4pm, reaching over to switch my pc on and whilst it was loading I would go make a coffee. Then I would play through until 8am. (I was UK ) Then when I logged off I would go to bed and think about how I had done and then do same next day. I cant describe how much I loved it. It became the most important thing in my life, like you said the adventures with friends and the music (oh god the music was amazing) immersed me. I had a girlfriend at the time and I remember her coming over and just watching me play, I couldn't stop. It took over my life, it consumed everything. I saw things in the real world as a nuisance to stop me playing and I used to get mad if I had to do ANYTHING that stopped me playing. I will always look back fondly on that game but it did a lot of damage. I lost my girlfriend and I dropped out of education I was doing just to play. Its so daft to think I let it get to that but that's the stranglehold that game had on me. To someone who hasn't played this will never EVER know how amazing this game was for this time, everything you said reminded me of exactly the same stuff! great video!

[@Ben-ehana]

Every time I watch this video, I'm amazed. I've never been one to get addicted to online games/MMOs. I might play one a few hours a day for like two or so weeks but then I just lose interest from the grind or other things in my life make me busy. I find it so interesting to how online gaming addiction affected you. Love the video though, every single time!