My Sister Called Me To Babysit While Her Husband Shut Himself Away So He Can Play Games r/AITA

[@SLTheOneAndAwesome19]

Story 1: "Don't let them in the room, it's my day off." Dude. My guy. THERE ARE NO DAYS OFF FROM PARENTING. Honestly, kudos to OP for not enabling his bullshit.

[@damien678]

i wish so many people really understood this before becoming parents. oh my god.

[@PrincessQ-fj9ly]

My thoughts exactly! I really wish people would just THINK about children before actually having them.

[@thornglitter]

If they're your own kids it's not babysitting.

[@gaxalee7392]

Dads like this are why people ask dads if they’re babysitting when they take their kids out in public.

[@mindyschocolate]

Exactly

[@Ifrit86]

Nono, the _dad_ needed the babysitting. He needed the crusts cut off his sandwich or he might choke and die since he's so invalid

[@PrincessQ-fj9ly]

Exactly! I hate it when parents use the term babysitting for their own children! I think it goes without saying but if you can't handle children then DON'T have children!

[@lauraanderson8785]

Exactly. Babysitting is DEFINED as watching someone else's kid. It's impossible to babysit your own kids. You can only parent them.

[@owl7072]

Story 1: I would be _embarrassed_ as hell to admit I was that useless of a spouse.

[@Flufferz626]

Even owl fathers are better fathers 😝

[@fate_clotho9596]

@Owlmost Right?! That most definitely *WASN'T* a father. Complaining it was his "only day off!" when he works only part-time! Regardless if it's 6 days a week, or not! He's a lazy mooch, who happened to become a sperm donor a few times, and refuses to grow the fuck up and accept responsibilities! Once divorced? He's going to get a *HELL* of a wake up call when that child support garnishment starts coming out of his check!

[@FirstIsa]

@@fate_clotho9596 by and large I agree with you. But I can understand why some "part-time" jobs desperately need a day off. I did part time bike delivery for about a year ($80-90 a day just in tips +$7.50/hr) and doubt I could have done anything but sleep if I'd been doing it 6 days a week instead of 5 simply because that meant from 9am-1:30pm I usually covered 15-20 miles on top of going up and down multiple flights of stairs, plus making orders when the in shop staff was behind. By the time Friday hit I was physically and mentally exhausted. But I couldn't even find the energy to game at the end of the week. If you have the time for your.hobbies you have the time and energy to be a parent.

[@fate_clotho9596]

@FirstIsa Oh, I thoroughly agree with you! 110%! I apologize if it came across otherwise. What I meant was that since he was working part-time, (and ESPECIALLY since both he AND his wife consider him parenting their children as him "babysitting"), that it sounds like he has PLENTY of time on his hands to play his game. That he can take this day off and actually be a real father.

[@moebiusjdx7288]

@@fate_clotho9596 From home no less!!!! He doesn't even go anywhere!!! He has no right to whine!

[@Buff_Helpy]

*reads first paragraph of story 1* Mark:"should we give our judgement now?" Buff Helpy:"meh let's let the husband dig his hole a little for shits and giggles."

[@Pastel_Dreams]

😂😂😂

[@PrincessQ-fj9ly]

XD

[@SIXPACFISH]

Mark, it isn't even that she has NO Friends from her school days. She has failed to make any friends in all the time she has been out of school from strangers who never knew her. That has to tell you something about her. OP should tell her Bro that he is a total whipped coward to try to shift his own ME Problem, into an OP Problem.

[@zitronentee2302]

now that you mention it ...i didnt think about it that way kid SIL was an asshole and didnt make friends but being an adult so shitty that not even the typical gossip girl wants to be your friend and you are totally alone . that says something

[@jenicdarling9425]

Seriously like she can’t keep any friendships? Ya sounds like she still has some self improvement left to do. she’s a adult she can make her own instead of him trying to make play dates for her. And why does he think that this falls on op to step up & fix? He has friends and they have gf/wives, he can do a doubt date or have everyone over for dinner or game night. It’s on him & her to do something not op & their friends who she bullied all throughout school, he should be happy op is even civil to her. He’s using manipulation tactics by threatening to cut op out to force them to do this

[@drewthistlethwaite8909]

@@jenicdarling9425they dead ass have play therapy for adults in some places. It’s called a fancy group therapy term tho lol. My friend with social stress went abd it really helped. My childhood bully was there and she’d had enough growth to apologize and tell me she’ll stay far away or whatever I am most comfy with when I went to grab my friend. I was like you’re good now. Come to find out she was just extremely distegulated. And get fam was too. So no one saw issue. But she lost her first girlfriend she loved to it so got help. They did eventually get back together!!!! They have a toddler now. Unfortunately most of my other bullies are on stuff or not doing great.

[@SuperBatSpider]

Story 1 “Let me know when the divorce comes” would be my reaction to the demand to apologize to him

[@mikeb3717]

"You won't let me into the kids' lives? Then whose gonna babysit them while you're playing video games like a loser and your wife is making all the money?"

[@TsukiKageTora]

Story 2: if she is mature enough to marry, she is mature enough to make friends by herself.

[@kaykay8855]

True, op’s brother has no right to ask to make nice with her bully and he can’t force her friends to make nice. Op is civil enough at family events (that’s more than I can do).

[@jgw5491]

She probably prided herself on making only male friends, and brother might have nixed that when they started seeing each other. Probably for good reason since her only attraction was probably the "benefits".

[@musicallydisneyamvs6731]

Story 1.) My sister tried this on me with her own kid. I left her with a smile. NTA OP.

[@beautybard]

Dude, fuck that. I love my baby sister and would always lend a hand with my nephew if I could. But damn. If I had to bend over backwards to help and then her dude pulled that shit... I. Would. LOSE IT. Good on ya for kickin' rocks.

[@PrincessQ-fj9ly]

Good on you. I would never do this to my sister. And I would make a dealbreaker if any partner of mine is a deadbeat dad. If you can't be bothered to even try to raise your children, then just don't have children.

[@cyrilenejones8487]

Last story, she explained to him many times the reason and he refused to listen. No need to remain friends.

[@xplayfan21]

Spot on

[@SuperBatSpider]

Story 3 in a nutshell Mom:*Ignores OP* OP:*Ignores Mom* Mom: *REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!* NTA

[@songohan3321]

Basically what happened is OP told her mother the plans. OP words floated in her mother's head for 1 minute and exited to be scattered to the winds.

[@Mewse1203]

Story 3: NTA she was being overbearing and awful. She was also warned multiple times to not come over unannounced. She was just then told multiple times what they would be doing. She won't listen and this was the only way to get the point across. If you talk to someone over and over and they keep stomping your boundaries, there's no more time for talk. Also, it's 2021. We all have a 0hone with us at all times. There should be no more "coming over unannounced" and especially not to a home with a newborn.

[@divedweller4295]

Story 5 - It sounds like everything there was to say had already been said multiple times. All that was left was the fallout, which OP provided.

[@kristys7172]

I live in Arizona, heat stroke is real. People die from overheating. Op is the AH for not turning on AC for the nephew.

[@fcold9402]

2. NTA. Why would she want a pitty invite? You guys don't need to invite an outsider to your friend group, especially one that was nasty to you.

[@Rhaenarys]

I would've asked him how much is he willing to pay me...

[@jgw5491]

@@Rhaenarys lol!

[@JootjeJ]

You're bloody awesome yourself for brightening up our days! Thank you

[@DarkTraveler09]

Story 1: NTA. The fact that this man prioritizes gaming over taking care of his own children, and calls it babysitting, just shows how much the husband still has to grow up. OP doesn't have to apologies for anything. Story 2: NTA. Okay, who tries to force their sibling and their friends to include a former bully. Sorry, that's not how things work. Plus, there's a reason why she doesn't have friends. Story 3: NTA. Good lord, where the hell do I start with this? But to sum it up, if Mother can't obey the boundaries that OP set up, she has no privileges to see the baby. Story 4: YTA. I get it, but...what works for you doesn't always work for others. Especially that it's a young child, their bodies don't adapt as easily. Just put the AC on whenever the kid is around. Story 5: NTA. You told your friend multiple times that you just want to hangout, just you and him. You essentially warned him, yet, he kept bringing the GF over. Sorry, if he can't take the hint, it's probably best to cut ties with him. He'll either understand that he basically broke your trust/friendship, or be to whipped to care. Regardless, OP, I don't think you did anything wrong, so long as you don't try to pry to see what he's doing after the blockage.

[@WobblesandBean]

Welcome to gamer guys. The majority of them are like this: immature, selfish, lazy, irresponsible, and combative. I used to be a gamer myself, I even worked as an associate producer for Blizzard, Nintendo, and Atlus. It was uncommon for me to come across a guy who didn't fit that description. They completely destroyed my love of video games, as well as my career.

[@wolfiebunnyshopofficial3923]

@@WobblesandBean can confirm, ex husband was a gamer guy. decided to be an official single parent since it was already my 24/7 hobby thanks to that trash

[@fcold9402]

1. NTA. Sister has an emergency and her husband is home. Dad should take care of his own kids. I would have simply left. They are his kids, he is useless. DO NOT apologize to him.

[@socksandpi1264]

Respect is a two-way street. Treat people with the same respect you expect/demand others show you.

[@chits28]

5- OP was friends with him "first" 🤣🤣🤣 Ohkay! Take a hint OP. He doesn't wanna upset the GF and clearly he doesn't think you are important enough to continue hanging out like before. I don't think OP is the asshole though, just stupid maybe.

[@MalachioftheForest]

Story 1: NTA idk how the fuck that "father" could act like that. If my wife had to call someone over to watch the kids cause I.. refused to? I would be fucking mortified. That manbaby has no shame.

[@Violets_and_Madness]

I think NTA for the last one. I honestly think the guy has been given enough explanation in the last to figure out why the OP is upset. Unless this guy is completely dense, he really would figure it out.

[@GBunnyG]

Therapy means you forgive your bully for yourself. It doesn't mean making nice and being friends. I was bullied mercilessly. 20+ years later, I have absolutely no desire to make nice with any of them.

[@ilbercgross4736]

I would think that therapy is to move on from said bully so you are no longer triggered by what happened or by them. That is something OP needs and can get without therapy. You can forgive your bully and still want nothing to do with with. The two options do not need to be hand in hand. OP needs to learn one or the other. As an adult, OP has full rights regardless of her options to not be friends with anyone for any reasons. Hair cut, smile, a person saying "umm" all the time, whatever. If SIL has no friends as an adult, more than likely it is because she is a POS as an adult. OP can also hold on to that hate and allow SIL to live rent free in her head. I do not recommend this option. From personal experience, I either waste little or no energy on people from my past or I have forgiven them. Some I have forgiven have become friends to a point.

[@beautybard]

I've never had that face to face conflict with old bullies... Only them friending me on FB, asking for help with their MLM shit like nothing happened.

[@ilbercgross4736]

@@beautybard I have had to many face to face. I am in therapy (shit happens during war) and this topic can up a few years ago. For me it is easy to just nothing people and ignore them. It is difficult for me to remember which people I have forgiven and of those which i am friendly with instead of a cause hello. Though i do play it up at times with those I have nothing. They get to talking with me and I explain I do not know them. I ask them to tell me where and how I know them. They either leave me alone or get around to admitting what they have done. Early on I let them know that I have memory problems since being over seas. Which is a bold face lie. I do remember, I just do not waste energy on trying to make it a good or bad memory. It is just there. My therapist thinks that is the best thing for me right now. I have bigger issues to work through.

[@GBunnyG]

@@aduckofsomesort That is also true.

[@damien678]

id say therapy doesnt necessarily mean forgiving them for yourself, since that... isnt how everyone works? people need different approaches for the same situation. but i get that that's definitely useful for some, and how it was for you. and its super underatandable to forgive but never forget, and not want to make amends even if you do forgive.

[@mindyschocolate]

There’s no such thing as babysitting your own child. Good on OP for telling it like it is.

[@Mewse1203]

Story 2: NTA why is this dude not looking at his wife and trying to figure out why she has no friends? Why is the onus on OP and not on the bully to make things right? Pretty disgusting of OP's brother to expect his sister to take in her bully.

[@BIGEAGLEDUDE]

With the second story you're not in the wrong and you may want to prepare yourself to go low contact with your brother for a while because I get the feeling that he's just going to an able everything that she did to you and your friends in the past. Because let's be honest here she's not really sorry for how she treated you guys she's just sorry about the outcome. The only reason why your your parents are upset is because they don't want to have to pick a side between the son who married the girl who made their daughter's life a living hell in high school or the daughter who's not going to enable the bully who is married into the family. Not to mention that the moment the bully ends up pregnant is the moment your parents will pick your brother before you. You're not in the wrong but this is only going to get worse and you guys stay true to your guns and you need to tell your parents what's going to happen if they try to go down that road

[@LilChuunosuke]

*Story 1:* NTA. It's impossible to "babysit" your own kids. That's called being a parent. By insisting the father taking care of his own children is "babysitting", they are directly implying that the father is not a parent to his own children. Which, from the sounds of it, would be an accurate summary. He gave birth to them, married their mom, and lives under the same roof. But he isnt parenting them. He's just kinda...there.

[@PrincessQ-fj9ly]

Yep. Just essentially being a useless husband and father just as OP described him.

[@HowlingEclipse]

A day off??? And he's a parent??? Bloody hell...

[@MsUnamusedNerd]

STORY 1: NTA, The father is being useless, it’s not babysitting when it’s your own kid. Seriously its need to be normalized for men who are fathers to take part in childcare and not wait until their “old enough to do stuff with or give the money to be happy“. Honestly when it comes to fathers like that what are they going to do when their wives die? Mark has read a bunch of stories where the father that was completely useless when feeling with the child care they have the eldest child take the responsibility of mother & father for the younger siblings. Or they just have the nearest adult female to mother their children while they are out busy trying to find a replacement mother or they are too depressed to do anything other than go to work for a few hours a day…..like that one story where Op was barely 10 years old when he took the responsibility of being a mother and father to his young sisters for years. Or what about the other story where Opie was the sister-in-law to a useless father the consul he used her as an emergency mother while he was either dating or playing video games, one situation where he was so useless he couldn’t even make his own daughter a peanut butter and jelly sandwich because she was hungry, he said he told his own daughter to go ask her aunt to make it for her because he couldn’t be bothered to get off of his gaming station to make sure his daughter was fed.

[@wplains]

This generation and their video games are childish infants.

[@Flufferz626]

@@wplains deadbeat dads were that way before video games. I know plenty of attentive parents who are avid gamers.

[@wmdkitty]

We have a case on trial in my county rn where a baby died because the "father" couldn't be bothered to pause his games or, later, even wake up, to feed the baby.

[@wplains]

@@aduckofsomesort No. I was born in a less selfish and more responsible generation where “games” were not the be all end all of grown men!

[@kerribottriell-baxter7345]

@@wplains And bet you any money that same generation had just as many deadbeat dads... Remember there was the 1950s where the mothers did everything because "the husband/father worked" and there are still men out there who still have that annoying mentality - and I've seen it!

[@YankeeBigBird]

Story 4 about the a/c reminds me about what happened with my wife and I with In-laws. We visited for the first time in summer (High desert Western USA, so hot in daytime, 30+degrees cooler overnight) and given the guest room, which is normal, but as the night went on, the room became insufferably hot, even with the 1 window and door open. No cross ventilation as nothing else in the house was open to the outside. I finally went downstairs to the thermostat and changed it from 75f to 68f, just so we could get some cold air through the vents. The next morning my BIL went off on me because I changed the thermostat and it could cause the evaporator to ice over and potentially break the a/c...so,Ok..They also said that, "yeah, That's the hottest room in the house". wtf! So I went to the store and bought a box fan to wedge in the window to equalize the temperature when the day started cooling off. But when they saw me bring in the box, they were insulted! Like I just shit all over their hospitality. That was one of many instances of feeling humiliation and a crap guest,.that now when visiting Family, I get a hotel room! I still let Family stay at my house, but I will be goddammned if I will ever feel shame for staying at someone's house!

[@cindyjohnston535]

That really pisses me off: you have guests, you make them comfortable. A little more a/c in the summer or heat in the winter. It's not going to raise the bills that much. My cousin (actually, her husband) makes it freezing in both the summer AND winter.

[@itazuranakisu]

I would always find myself “busy” or say “no those aren’t my kids and they have a capable father at home that can ‘babysit’ his kids” if they push. That man-child chose to get married, chose that amount of kids and chose to be a burden instead of a partner. You don’t get time off from being a parent especially when your partner needs you to step up. The sister is just as ungrateful. The mom is ungrateful too and if she’s so upset then she can be the babysitting maid.

[@colleencook382]

Op discussed this several times with Ben about no girlfriend and he kept dissrespecting her requests. NTA

[@itrasheditgood]

I don’t get why people think that people of the opposite sex can’t be just friends. I think Ben is being manipulated by gf to not hang with OP alone because she does have trust issues. OP has set very clear lines in how she wanted to proceed with Ben going forward and he is not respecting her wishes. It’s not rocket science, OP doesn’t get along with Ben’s gf and she doesn’t want her around. I think OP has made many attempts to explain the situation, so if she wants to ghost him she needs permission from no one and no one should make her feel like shit for making that decision, because it doesn’t seem like Ben is treating her like a friend.

[@SkiesOfYellow]

Story 3: Omg. I love OPs reaction to his mother in this. That is AMAZING. He's got a lovely shiny spine and is definitely NTA. I would absolutely be throwing down with any relatives who are refusing to give me my baby back (the whole "mommy is trying to take you away from gramma, but I won't let her" is absolute bs and would result in you losing all baby holding privileges in our house). OPs mom seems deranged and I'm glad he's put her and her flying monkeys in time out. Story 4: I hate window AC units. They do weird things to my sinuses and have since I was a kid. I really wanted central AC when we were house hunting, but the house we ended up in does not have it. We have window AC units in a bunch of the rooms. My sinuses have been awful this summer because if it hits 78* in our house, they go on. I'm not going to make my kids suffer when they don't have to. OP is YTA. It's one thing to torture yourself, it's another to subject innocent kids to that. (I was working on my Camp NaNoWriMo story while I was listening today.)

[@ivy4104]

The AC story, as a German, never having had an AC….. still yta, if you’ve got the means to make life better for the child you’re watching, do it

[@Becks-and-books]

I'm in Sweden and we don't have AC, but we might also have a different type of climate (dry vs humid, etc.), and we have other techniques of keepin the house cool during a heatwave. Right now we're around 90 degrees and during the day we keep all the windows shut in the upstairs bedrooms, blinds drawn, until the sun isn't high in the sky anymore (around 8pm), and then we open all windows wide to let the air go through the entire house. On the bottom floor the door is open all the time to keep a breeze going, but blinds drawn where the sun shines. This isn't possible in all places in the world, so if your only way of keeping cool is lying down on the tiles with an icepack on your neck... that's just wrong. Also, we'd def use the AC if we could in summer.

[@OZARKMOON1960]

#3 - after telling mom 3x about having plans, mom completely ignores the info and 'just stops by'. I call a truck load of BS there - she wants to control OP and is hide-bound to stomp any boundary that is laid out. OP did the perfect thing; just walk away and continue with the plans her mom was warned about. As to the flying monkeys - the peanut gallery always has a lot to say until they either hear the whole truth or get their own baby time privileges taken away. It is absolutely terrible that they all ignored OP and her spouse before the baby came. What a bunch of a-holes!

[@mamm7223]

Story #1: He works PART-TIME FROM HOME, is home, but won't "babysit" his own children because he's gaming? Seriously?? Looks like being the "donor" for the kids was the last time he had anything to do with "parenting". What does she need him for? Part time job, gamer, have to bring in a sitter when he's in the next room? He still thinks he's a teenager, not a parent. Sister needs to dump that lazy AH....he'll be forced to pay child support (probably more than wife get now), pay at least part of day care and no more attitude to deal with. The kids probably won't notice he's gone. OP, you were not wrong.

[@akagamenokyla1042]

In the AC story the brother said "You don't HAVE TO do that anymore." Dose that mean their parents drilled the "AC is bad, don't use" into them so much that OP can't let go of it now? Is laying on cool tile with an ice pack on his neck a coping mechanism? WTH is that line about?

[@Becks-and-books]

i read that as they didn't have ac when they were kids

[@akagamenokyla1042]

@@Becks-and-books maybe, but thay sentence is still overlooked by too many in my opinion.

[@groofromtheup5719]

Doesn't matter. Kids are adaptable. The kid will be fine. Some people just don't like AC. Aretha Franklin wouldn't perform in an ACed venue.

[@donaldstewart2746]

Story 5 sounds like the two girls are jealous of each other! And girlfriend probably pushed to go with him everywhere he goes to keep an eye on what ever he does, is insecure big time. Most likely feels men and women can't be friends, something else is going on.

[@Chaoticbunnii]

I don’t agree. OP expressed multiple times that she does not feel comfortable around the girlfriend, and Ben agreed to her terms and said he would accommodate. He went back on his word by bringing his girlfriend around all the time without telling OP before hand. It has nothing to do with her being jealous of the girlfriend. I had a similar situation with an old friend of mine. We had been friends for over 7 years, but every time he got into a relationship, he would completely ghost me or cancel plans on me constantly for the girl he was with at the time because the girl was jealous of me. I never even got the chance to meet the girlfriends because they refused to even be around me. They constantly gave him ultimatums and he always chose them. This would go on until they broke up and then he would want to hangout like old times again. After the 4th time of this happening, I completely blocked him on everything. I wasn’t jealous of his relationships. I was in my own during that time, but would still make time to spend time with him and my other friends. My partners understood that I like to make time to hangout with my friends, and we had that agreement. Ben is the TA for trying to force a friendship where neither of the girls wanted one, and forcing his girlfriend on OP. It’s not about guys and girls not being able to be friends. It’s about Ben not respecting OPs boundaries. She had every right to ghost him like she did.

[@slytherinlibrarian3501]

Even WITH our central air running, my bigger dog loves to dramatically flop on the wood floor to cool off. I can't even imagine expecting someone to hang out on a tile floor in that kind of heat WITHOUT the air. What an asshole.

[@wickedbird1538]

To the woman who doesn’t want to run A/C for nephew. Ability to be comfortable in hot weather takes conditioning. Ask any football coach. This isn’t good for the child. There are compromises. A cool pack scarf around the neck. Turn on Air in one area. We have a small unit that sits on a bedroom table and has a vent to the window to make only that room cold.

[@alicewilloughby4318]

Story 1 - Sister's husband is TA. Duh. I've seen a couple of other stories where a husband is so addicted to his games that he "couldn't" feed or care for his own kids. Story 2 - If the woman still has no friends, she can't have changed all that much. Unless they're living in a VERY small, insular community, she would surely have met new people since high school. If she hasn't managed to make friends with any of them, she needs to take a hard look at herself. Story 3 - NTA.

[@voxkine9385]

Story 2: “Okay bro. I’ll take her out with my friends… BUT, and this is non-negotiable, I get to kick you square in the nads as hard as I possible can. YOU can repay the years of suffering I suffered through because of her.”

[@colleencook382]

ROFL! 😆

[@broken_queer_but_fighting8589]

Just got out of my flute lesson perfect timing, I needed to relax cause it was frustrating cause we are working on my song

[@thornglitter]

FLUTE SOLO!!!

[@broken_queer_but_fighting8589]

@@thornglitter lol kinda flute background, then singing and guitar at the same time

[@thedestroyasystem]

Oooh I want to hear! You should post the song when you finish (if you want to oc) ❤️

[@BIGEAGLEDUDE]

With the first story you're not in the wrong and quite frankly if your brother-in-law is threatening not letting you see the kids again he's basically being mentally and emotionally abusive to your sister when nobody from your side of the family is not around. I think the only reason why your sister is snapping at you is because she knows her hell is going to get a lot worse the moment she gets back to the house and the only reason why your mother is upset with you is because she knows that she may lose her grandkids if you don't play nice with the son-in-law. I get the feeling that the son-in-law is the type that doesn't want spend time with his children and would rather have somebody else watch them when he doesn't want to especially on his day off. You're not in the wrong for how you feel if what you said to him. However you might want to take your sister of side and talk to her privately about what's going on in home and ask for is there anything toxic family should know about especially from an emotionally abusive situation.

[@sammyk.6457]

These are nice to pass the time, my dog came home from the vet a few days ago so I’ve been listening to these watching over her

[@lucieclayton10]

Mark, bless you. You are the first narrator that doesn't advocate therapy. Can tell you are english

[@A.x3]

4:52 I love when British people say "shorely" 😂

[@SilverMKI]

Don't call me Shirley.

[@blakezummo264]

Glad I caught this video right when it came out! Love the content Mark

[@kerribottriell-baxter7345]

Oh heck no, not the AH in Story 3! Cut that woman out of your life. (Never heard of the first post, but glad they got something bright in their lives with their daughter).

[@kyrriana1772]

I have sympathy for the last OP. It stings being dropped like dirty sock when your long term good fried finds someone to screw. No more talks, no more fun, no more being there for each other, just: haha sorry I'm with girlfriend. Been there 👍

[@drewthistlethwaite8909]

I dont become friends again when ppl do this. They somehow get mad I won’t suddenly be diet dating them to fill the void between partners lol.

[@peelthismonkey]

Story 3 - NTA - You can't just assume it's okay to go to any 1's house. You always ring 1st and ask will they be home. That Mother needs a massive timeout

[@NewGothOnTheBlock]

Was about to leave to walk my Dog and minutes before leaving its up!. Always love to listen to the stories while walking my Dog (Berry, goodest girl ☺️) and wearing just one earphone 🖤

[@UzumakiDonnoHinata]

Hi Mark! Perfect timing. Just brought my old man doggo back from the vet. He legitimately loves the vet because they give him liver treats. Freakin' weirdo lol. He's somewhere around 9 or 10 and starting to have some issues. But we got him some antibiotics and he should be good. 👍

[@broken_queer_but_fighting8589]

Yay im glad the doggo will be ok

[@karab7626]

After the day one had I needed this. Your voice is so soothing Mark thank you!

[@jackdavies4542]

Mark you don't need to stay up this late for us it's okay to post them In the day

[@blackroseinbloom]

Story 4: it’s better to not be dependent on AC in my opinion. I grew up in SoCal and I remember school days where it would be 90°F and teachers in some classes wouldn’t have functioning AC units and they’d get mad at us for using our papers as fans. At least the kid in the story has a method for keeping cool. There’s a lot of easy ways to cool off than immediately using an AC unit, cost effective too. NAH, but I hope OP can communicate their concerns in a way that both parties understand.

[@kristinwiebold2433]

If a family member of mine married my bully and said I had to fix everything I would first call out the sibling for marrying my bully and say I am not doing anything unless the bully genuinely apologizes to me for what they did. I would be civil as long as the bully was.

[@heleneclark563]

Story 4: Reminds me of work. Work in an Assisted Living Facility. Some of the residents don’t like to turn on their AC. Meanwhile the staff caring for them are ready to pass out from the heat.

[@broken_queer_but_fighting8589]

Whoever is reading this i send hugs and great vibes. Drink water, eat food, nap, take a break, take care of yourself gosh darn it. And if you don't I swear I will find you and keep you in a cottage and take care of you. 🤗🤗💜💜🤗🤗💜💜🤗🤗💜💜🤗🤗💜💜🤗🤗💜💜🤗🤗💜💜🤗🤗💜💜🤗🤗💜💜

[@katiesmith2031]

Hugs and great vibes back 🤗🤗💜💜🤗🤗

[@broken_queer_but_fighting8589]

@@katiesmith2031 🤗🤗💜💜🤗🤗💜💜

[@colleencook382]

Mark, you sound much better today! Glad to hear it!

[@Rhaenarys]

The bully/ brother one...I would've asked him how much he was going to pay me.

[@telinhajp]

Good morning, Mark! Wishing you the best day ever! ❤️

[@olly2027]

The brother can pay for the ac bill.

[@itrasheditgood]

My cousin had a gf for a while that was a bully of mine in high school, I could be civil at family events, but there was no way she would ever be my friend. What OPs brother is asking is a hard ask, he needs to mind his own business and let his wife make her own friends.

[@nareegreel]

Story 4; my grandmother was like that with the AC and literally felt like I was dying. I can't imagine OPs poor nephew boiling alive at his aunts is cruel to me

[@small_joys2022]

Story 2: The wife does not really need new "friends". She just needs more sheep to be mean to, like she used to be in high school. And if she can get her hooks into op and her friend circle, she will make damn sure to make everyone of their lives hell. How entitled of the brother to try and force this on the sister! She should have gone no contact the minute he decided to marry her. My brother married a girl who bullied my mom while she was still alive in spite of my mom being an angel to her and all his friends. So when he married her after my mom passed away I broke off all contact with him. Thankfully I was too busy with my work and life to interact with her so she never got a chance to bully me. But I am sure she would, given the chance. Its in their basic nature.

[@anikat6783]

We have AC in one room for our cat. I wish we could have it everywhere 🥵

[@kellypatterson8506]

I'm friends casually with a couple of my bullies from school, but their is a huge difference between the person they are now and whom they were.

[@pinkfire2344]

For the first story...I didn't need to go past a father considering watching his own children to be "babysitting" to make my judgement. But the fun didn't stop there. This is a grown ass man who feels the need to have an antagonistic relationship with a teenage girl?! How small of a person do you need to be to get into pissing contests with a minor?! A minor who is more responsible for your own children than you are? If this woman wants to be under this man's bootheel, that's her choice. She does not, however, get to make that decision for anyone else. Second story...how is this man not seeing the glaring red flags of a grown, mature woman not having the ability to make ANY friends of her own?! Third story...they had every right to do what they did. This woman was told they were NOT available for visiting. She showed up anyway. I've had people try and do this to me before and after I responded just this way...it never happened again. It was the only thing that worked. People who boundary stomp will never get the message if you keep giving in. Fourth story...is this person an idiot?! So how close to heat stroke does a child need to be before you WOULD turn on the ac?! Forcing a child to lay on the floor with ice packs is tantamount to abuse. Fifth story...nope, NTA. If this new girlfriend has this many insecurities this early in the relationship...dude, run. As for a lack of explanation, how many times is OP supposed to have to explain their position before their friend respects it? This isn't as simple as not liking his girlfriend. OP legitimately gave it a shot and it's the friend that keeps forcing the girlfriend on her. At no point did OP ask him to choose between them, she's just not interesting in being friends with her. It's beyond normal for someone to hang out with their friends WITHOUT their significant other, and we all know the only reason the girlfriend insists on coming is the fact the friend is a girl. Spelling things out for someone yet one more time before enacting consequences never brings clarity to any situation. To quote Bethenny Frankel, "I can explain it to you, I just can't understand it for you".

[@mallowpuff5]

Slinky malinky is a cat from a classic kids book in New Zealand. By Lynley Dodd, the dog is called Hairy McLary

[@voidstepstudios5133]

I really feel the friend in story 5. a whole friend group recently cut me off and refused to explain why. people who do that are terrible

[@bellesmith8925]

Spicy level unlocked!

[@sethjr9815]

I play games alot and have 2 pre teens, got crap cannons on me many times, some people arent suited for kids

[@augustineabram1545]

NTA. Brother and I would not be friends. She need to make her own friends.

[@justozzy5559]

Story two is definitely a NTA verdict. There's definitely a reason that SIL doesn't have friends. I do, however, want to talk about my high school bully experience. My friend, Kai, and I were utterly awful to each other in high school. We were both dealing with so much shit at home, struggling with our identities, sexualities, and much much more. Since high school, we have both gotten mental health care and have grown substantially as people. I do consider them to be a good friend now, and we have gone on a couple dates even. Kai and I have grown into better people since high school. But OPs now sister in law clearly has not.

[@amysmith6791]

Story 2- she has no friends? Maybe the husband should look at why instead of focusing the issue.

[@hoper1294]

I hope you're having a great day Mark!!!!!

[@mayurakshimukherjee7948]

Nta... Your own dad/mom does not babysit you.

[@kimmurphy6621]

Story 5- It seems to me there are some things unsaid. I also find it hard to believe you meet someone twice and have already formed an opinion on them, doesn't sound like much of a chance was given.

[@kathrynewhitmore]

Hi Mark - this came out at the perfect time! I'm on my dinner break... I Nay have some MC for you with this job of mine, I'm very angry and about to quit... This made my day!

[@broken_queer_but_fighting8589]

I send hugs and I hope things get better soon much love 🤗🤗💜💜🤗🤗💜💜

[@kathrynewhitmore]

@@broken_queer_but_fighting8589 oh thank you sk much that is very sweet!!!

[@broken_queer_but_fighting8589]

@@kathrynewhitmore np🤗🤗💜💜🤗🤗💜💜

[@angelaroddy3768]

Story 3. Do not let up on your mother keep the boundaries don't back down. My mother over stepped alot and I wasn't frim with her when it came to my kids and now my son has problems understanding that as his parent he has to do as I say because my mother unminded me all the time

[@SuperBatSpider]

Story 5 NTA. OP explained before the hang out, never tried to make the relationship end, and friend constantly invited someone he was told not to invite. The title is misleading, OP did give explication just not right before the blocking.

[@marissab4730]

Blocking a very good friend is weird , she could just given them space , dropping a very good without given it one last conversation she jealous,

[@Rage_Harder_Then_Relax]

@@marissab4730 What are you an idiot? She did give him space. You clearly can't read

[@bluebeanie561]

More like she's asking did she do right without one final explanation before she blocked. Like "I am blocking you until you respect boundaries" type of message.

[@marissab4730]

@@bluebeanie561 then dude I just don’t believe she not jealous or that they were ever that close Close friends are hard to find to cut one just like that is sus

[@bluebeanie561]

@@marissab4730 Would he even notice that he is blocked? Or did the girlfriend meddle with that as well?

[@kerribottriell-baxter7345]

Story 2: Oh hell no, not the AH! I would not be friends with someone like that from my past. Civil, yes, and how civil depends on the actual person, (still learning grey rock thanks to being burned from people I thought were close).

[@cindyjohnston535]

If I saw my HS bully in the street I'd run her over. The thing is is I can't remember what she looks like (it's been 41 years)! 🤣

[@kerribottriell-baxter7345]

@@cindyjohnston535 I wouldn't know what many of them look like now, either, as they were in all in different locations growing up. However... I do have my Just No in-laws and I would so run them over 😂

[@greenteawithhoneyandcream7173]

For that second one I do want to know why his friends dont want to be friends with her. Is it a gender thing? Did his friends also say no? What's the deal?!

[@fate_clotho9596]

Because, as OP said, they all went to school with her, and she was the school bully.

[@BritInvLvr]

Story 4: I’ve lived in my house without AC for ten years and a condo for over twenty with AC and hardly ever run it. I live in SoCal. So it gets hot. However, my house is well insulated and I have a whole house fan for the evening. It doesn’t get over 85F inside in the summer. You know, AC didn’t always exist. And yet we survive. So many delicate flowers making judgments.

[@CJalterr]

People should know if you have a child you have to take care of them. You cannot expect to just work come home and do nothing and just play games you have to take care of your kids and parent them.

[@adrianaaab436]

For the last story I get that certain people don’t get along but I always try really hard to be nice and friendly to my friends SO’s that way I can eliminate as much drama as possible.

[@augustineabram1545]

NTA. His kids, his problem. Say okay, still not your kids.

[@riceracm]

18:00 Wait, what were _your_ thoughts Mark on story #4? Isn’t it really common in the UK not to have air conditioning? 🇬🇧

[@mayfl0wers]

Story 5: Soft ESH. She was absolutely right for cutting off a friend that doesnt respect her boundaries, but a simple quick text saying "Clearly, you value your relationship over my boundaries and our friendship so I'm going to have to distance myself from you" would be better than blocking/ghosting.

[@Rage_Harder_Then_Relax]

She told him how her and the GF aren't compatible and he didn't take notice to ALL THE TIMES SHE ASKED HIM TO COME ALONE WHEN THEY MEET UP. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to see the friend is useless and can't understand the fore times she's told him what she wanted. He's an idiot and deserved to be blocked/ghosted whatever.

[@Mscrimsondragon]

He works PART TIME...from home and calls dealing with his own kids "babysitting"? I would have gone off on him to and told sister to never call me again to watch them if he is in the house. Thats freaking ridiculous. And it also shows his maturity double when he threatens to cut off OPs contact with the kids because OP DARED to call him out on his bullsh$t. Its not babysitting when its your own damn kids.

[@socialmoon]

Bullies don't deserve forgiveness.

[@robertx8020]

1st story I must admit, I had to laught too..and then get sad over how much of an AH the kids's dad is! Good for OP for telling him the truth! He IS a bad parent (well not even a parent at all) And the sister should get her head out of her own ass!! She should not be mad at OP but mad at her husband for making her come home from work! She is an AH too and not a parent either..why do these 2 have MULTIPLE children? After the first one she should have known the 'dad' was a horrible parent! And OP's mother needs a reality check!! And try to raize her daughter (OP's sister) OMG what a family ..(except for OP and her dad ) ----------------------------------------------------- 2nd story NTA even if you brothers wife was the nicest person in the world, you are obligated to include her in your friends group. Though admittedly it WOULD be easier if she WAS nice and didn't have a history! But IF you want to have your friends group destroyed and your friends hating you? Then go on and take her with you! And for ppl saying "but it's sooo long ago" and "but familyyyyy"? Screw you and NO! Your brother is a bully too so avoid him as much as you can! -------------------------------------------------------- 3rd story NTA and this was perfect ..just ignore her GREAT!! more ppl should do that! She broke the (simple) rules and she sounds entitled as hell! Childish behavior? YES! But sometimes this is needed to get through to someone ..although it didn't work in this case! And how did the family found out? Because this petty, immature, entitled 'woman' called them with some sob story! Tell your family the truth and if they still side with 'mom' ? Tell them they have to call too from now on! You have great 'parents-in-laws' enjoy them, you don't need others! ---------------------------------------- 4th story YTA but no harm done if you change it NOW!! "It works for me to go w/o food so it would work for you (OP) so if you are at my place you are not allowed to eat :P " ------------------------------------------------------------ 5th story : NTA .For not wanting to hang out when she's there! .Yes I get it "it's his GF" and he can't do anything w/o her ...but in that case he should just have said "sorry, but WHEN we meed she will be allowed to come no matter what! " Ghosting him was extreme (since him being a long time friend) but you DID warn him! So maybe send him ONE final message! ================================= Mark rulessss (Even more than Markee ...but don't tell him that :P )

[@burningtree5]

Nice to have these while I crochet, thanks!

[@mpmansell]

Story 2: NTA. OP's brother's bad choice in women is his to deal with. He ought to be asking WHY she has no friends.

[@clappingpenguin4256]

Mark, you angel on Earth, I hope you're doing well as well as that lovely Poppy. 😊 Whatever you're getting up to this evening I hope you're having fun. 😎 Much love as always, my friend. 💛🤗💛

[@candiebarr6745]

I wouldn't even want to be friends with any of my school friends at this point. Certainly wouldn't want anything to do with the bullies

[@badkitty4922]

I'm getting better at being on time, lol! Much Love!!😘😘💖💖💖💖👍👍👋👋👋👋👋😂😂😂😜

[@spacedinvader9773]

why do I chuckle every time it's a "very soft arsehole"? :)

[@BlaizC]

I absolutely don't understand why "other family members" feel they have a right to get involved in a dispute between two people that has nothing to do with them. I might agree with one or the other of the two people, but I sure as heck wouldn't contact the other one to tell that person what they "should" be doing. I would totally freeze my mother out until she proved that she understood and respected the boundaries. Unless that happens, she doesn't see the baby. She's not entitled to see the baby just because she's the grandmother. It's not her baby, despite the fact that she seems to have a fantasy that it is. As for the mean girl without friends, unless she's 17 or 18, she's had years to change her ways and make friends. That she hasn't proves that there's still a problem with HER attitude/the way she treats people. It's not SIL's responsibility to give her a social life. There's an old saying that if a woman doesn't have any female friends, beware of her. There's a good reason why she doesn't have friends! The husband/father who wouldn't "babysit": If my children's father ever called it babysitting, he'd get a swift kick in the nether regions.