My wife was a lesbian once - should I worry?

There's a whole playlist of these questions - the Q217 series: • Q217
Support me on Patreon: / lindybeige
Buy the music - the music played at the end of my videos is now available here: lindybeige.ban...
Buy tat (merch):
www.bonfire.co...
More videos here:
All Lindybeige: • All Lindybeige
Lindybeige: a channel of archaeology, ancient and medieval warfare, rants, swing dance, travelogues, evolution, and whatever else occurs to me to make.
▼ Follow me...
Twitter: / lindybeige I may have some drivel to contribute to the Twittersphere, plus you get notice of uploads.
Facebook: / lindybeige
My website:
www.LloydianAsp...
Channel page:
/ lindybeige

[@matsv201]

Worst day ever when i walked in on my wife and my mistress in bed. Betrayed by both. I thought i could trust them

[@heraadrian7764]

If they still love you the most you won the jackpot.🤣.

[@matsv201]

@@heraadrian7764 They both just love them self the most, just use me for there plessure

[@rubenskiii]

😂

[@pronabol]

Any pictures?

[@nanoqht285]

@@pronabolWh-what? Seriously?

[@scapeghost4212]

People talking about how much Lindy's content' changed not realizing this series has been going on 7 years

[@Infinite_Jester]

As someone who hasn't watched a Lindybeige video since maybe 2015, I am rather confused.

[@Deinonuchus]

Lindy has always done whatever's on his mind at the moment. It's what I like about his channel.

[@affalaffaa]

@@Infinite_Jester For obvious reasons there is no internet connection allowed in prisons.

[@GoranXII]

@@Infinite_Jester Lindy has been releasing these 'book of questions' videos for seven years now.

[@TreeFrogOnATree]

It's probably a very long book

[@s-o-tariknomad6970]

This is one of the questions that makes it obvious that this book was written in the 80s, I don't think mentioning homosexuality and incest in the same sentence would fly today

[@rubenskiii]

Not it wouldn't and probably shouldn't.

[@T.efpunkt]

Not to mention the idea that a person can be "ex-lesbian/gay" as if it's something that can be cured or is down to personal choices.

[@sirsquid577]

​@@T.efpunkt well back was there a distinction between Bi and Gay? And if so maybe the author didn't due to their misunderstanding/experiences or more likely prejudice

[@d3vitron779]

@@sirsquid577bi erasure strikes again!!

[@higgldydiggldy2]

​@@T.efpunkt how are you supposed to refer to them? You're just looking for something to be mad at

[@warweasel2832]

As a man attracted to men, thank you for mentioning that there’s something offputting about how weird the relationship between straight women and gay men often is, and how accepted it is. There’s the seeming obsession for some straight women to “tempt” gay men like you pointed out with the Stephen Fry anecdote, but then there’s the reverse/complimentary bizarre behavior where some gay men get a “pass” to basically fully sexually assault their straight women friends because “it’s not serious” or “just a joke/prank”. Weird, at best.

[@Flergenbergen]

You think we should not accept that straight women and gay men can be friends? That's silly. As a man attracted to women, I have witnessed MANY times that straight men grab and touch other straight men in ways that would be considered sexual assault except that it's a "joke." Frequently I have seen this behavior among athletes and even pretty homophobic men. What is happening here is that men frequently don't respect these boundaries, whether gay or straight. It is not women's fault, nor is it gay men's fault. It certainly isn't something peculiar to gay men and their female friends.

[@Notsram77]

@@Flergenbergen If your friends regularly exhibit the behavior that OP described, then you should reconsider who you call friends.

[@Flergenbergen]

@@Notsram77 I didn't say anything about my "friends." You just inserted that. You can pretend you have never seen this happen, but others know you are not being honest. I have witnessed this many times among younger men, particularly athletes or very homophobic men who aren't sure about their own sexuality. Members of the football team at my high school routinely grabbed each other's rear ends in the hallways. These were young men who were in sexual relationships with female classmates.

[@RJLbwb]

My mother is absurdly into Clay Akin. It seems like almost all of his fans are women crushing on him. There are women that come up to him throwing themselves at him, to the point Akin is said to carry a copy of the issue of People were he came out. The inverse to this, speaking a heterosexual man, my experience is all woman insist that any single man is secretly crushing on her, and the second that unattached man shows an interest in another woman, they go nuts with jealously. So, yes it's weird.

[@warweasel2832]

@@Flergenbergen I didn’t mean to portray it as “ gay men and straight women can’t be friends”. Just that the socially-acceptable range of behavior there is uniquely wide (apart from straight male friendships, but that’s a whole different thing).

[@LordZylok]

First question straight up being "do you find bisexual people icky?".

[@hatientacetlen4246]

Yeah. It also assumes that it's a straight relationship. Lesbian telling her bi gf she'd been with a woman before probably won't break her mind.

[@Devantejah]

@@hatientacetlen4246 I thought these questions were directed to Lindybeige?

[@occamraiser]

It is more subtle than that. It actually factors out at 'do you find people that you are attracted to but who are attracted to the same people as you icky'. (which attitude seems perfectly understandable to me, if unconventional) It doesn't speak to the question of how do you feel about homosexuality within your own gender.

[@Acehamster]

“Yeah there’s a reason for that Luke” 🤣🤣🤣

[@LukeSumIpsePatremTe]

But her legs, though...

[@T.efpunkt]

​@@LukeSumIpsePatremTe bruh, you're talking about your daughter here.

[@chrismeandyou]

it's like there is a force drawing us together

[@frenzalrhomb6919]

Isn't that something Yoda once had to say to Luke Skywalker?

[@OldManRogers]

Luke I'm not your father... but I can be your DADDY

[@jimivey6462]

After discovering it, I would simply ask her, “Are you more bien or less bien now?”

[@Rynewulf]

I thought you were Ameribien

[@jimivey6462]

@@Rynewulf I bien Ameribien for 74 years.

[@Alex_Fahey]

​@@RynewulfThis line would work so much better with Caribbien.

[@jimbob3332]

"Très bien"

[@jimivey6462]

@@jimbob3332 🤗👍🇫🇷

[@Mr47steam]

"I was a lesbian once, should my wife be worried?"

[@JoschiChr]

Yes, yes she should be.

[@vulpes7079]

I mean if you're transmasc that could be a question? Like not one you'd ask but definitely a question

[@DanielSultana]

Yes, yes your wife should be very worried if you were a lesbian. I hope against hope for that poor woman that you still are a lesbian, and not just was

[@iankelley9704]

Gold

[@Vinemaple]

Hmm. I like your shoelaces.

[@forsakenquery]

Like for deploying the word "sapphic"

[@pepearagoneses6908]

I had to look it up.

[@willek1335]

For the uninitated an lazy: it means some related to lesbian.

[@kommissarkillemall2848]

@@pepearagoneses6908 derrived from the name of a ancient greek lady poet called Sappho, who enjoyed ladies-only company on the island.. you guessed it.. Lesbos.

[@steemlenn8797]

@@kommissarkillemall2848 Oh, there it's from! You never stop to learn. Language is such an intricate thing!

[@pepearagoneses6908]

@@kommissarkillemall2848 Thanks!

[@k0lpA]

<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="465">7:45</a> Yeah, I find the double standard troubling too.. it seems that it's ok and even funny when it's men being sexually harrassed by women.. I used to work in a restaurant and this old lady (who was mentally ill) kept looking at the guys working and she would wink at us and tell us she had erotic dreams about us and other innapropriate things and when we told our boss (who was a woman) she thought it was hillarious and did nothing about it. She came everyday and it was so degrading, some of they guys were minors too.. I am 100% sure if it was a man doing this to the girls he would have been arrested right away and frankly she probably should have been..

[@Mike91975]

I completely agree with you and though it's only a sample size of 2 a similar-ish thing has happened to me. I've been groped twice, both in a very public place, both in full view of bouncers (supposedly there to stop stuff like this happening) and both got huge eruption of laughter.

[@fireaza]

Now see, the thing with "It's so unfair! If it were a man, people would be more upset!" is it completely ignores the difference in physical power between a man and a woman. If a woman has an unwanted attraction to a man, there's not a whole lot she can do to force this to happen. At worst, she can create an uncomfortable/inappropriate situation. And no, drugs like Viagra still require the man to be aroused in order to work. Even if they did, this would require a lot of preparation by the assailant. A man on the other hand, *CAN* use physical force on an unwilling woman. And they do, this has happened many many times throughout history. This is why sexual harassment coming from a man is treated with much more seriousness than a woman harassing a man. Not to mention that humor heavily based on surprise. A woman sexually harassing a man is unusual, and hence, "funny". *EDIT* For the love of... For the people replying to this comment, I am explaining the reasons why society treats unwanted attention by a man with more seriousness than from a woman. I am *NOT* saying if this is a good or bad thing, nor what I approve or disapprove of. A lot of you need to learn reading comprehension and stop assuming that anyone who doesn't put on a big display of how much they disapprove of when brought up, must therefore be in favor of it.

[@UntoTheDepths]

​@@fireazawomen sexually harassing men bad

[@larslosh5598]

@@fireaza Your comment is a reply to a story about sexual harassment, which also technically touches on pedophilia. To criticize the person for sharing this story and justifying it being played off as a joke is highly suspicious.

[@UntoTheDepths]

​@@fireaza women sexually harassing men bad

[@Mcsqw]

I've no problem with my current partner having had previous partners, regardless of the biology of those previous partners. Total non-issue for me. If someone has cheated on a previous partner though...that would give me pause.

[@MrVeps1]

Yep, a lot of people think bisexuals are more likely to cheat, as if what's stopping people from cheating isn't love, devotion and morals, but rather a lack of options. So long as it was before we committed to each other, I don't see any issue. If I have a wife, she has already chosen me over everyone else in the world, and I her. I also think there's this fear that there will be something lacking from the relationship, but while I can't know for sure, not being a bisexual woman with past lovers of both genders, I assume this is a non-issue, and a projection of deeply rooted fears of inadequacy.

[@Gabrielnfs]

@@MrVeps1 True. I think it's completely absurd to attach likelihood to cheat to sexual orientation. At the end it is a matter of character. An ethical person simply will not cheat. And if someone is incapable of being monogamous without cheating (for whatever reason), that person can still be ethical by simply not getting into monogamous relationships. It's never an issue of sexuality, and always an issue of character. At the very least for those that lie and are disingenuous about it. I don't know if it applies to, say, moments of weakness, which I suppose can be a thing, though not something I personally would have personal insight into

[@VidkunQL]

_"I do remember a friend of mine once admitting that she'd... um..."_ All right Lindy, let's see you end that sentence without indelicacy, come on... Oh, well done!

[@TuriGamer]

I feel like this question isnt "What if your partner used to be gay" but "What if they are bi"

[@UngodlyFreak]

Yeah, this book is definitely a product of the 80s, when homosexuality was still a taboo and the term bisexual wasn't in common use outside of LGB circles. If you were attracted to both men and women in the 80s, the society considered you a homosexual first and foremost.

[@jerotoro2021]

It's neither. The question was specifically "what if your mate had had a lover of the same sex". This is talking about a direct action, not feelings or level of attraction or anything like that. Could be gay, could be bi, could be a straight person that was confused for a while. Could be a woman who thought they could get social clout by dating another woman, so the "relationship" was just a show, when in reality they were nothing more than friends. The question leaves all that ambiguous so that discussion can be had, that's the point of these questions.

[@TuriGamer]

@@jerotoro2021 lover implies a lot more than casual sex

[@jerotoro2021]

@@TuriGamer It's ambiguous. Maybe, maybe not.

[@unncommonsense]

@@TuriGamer I don't think it does, especially 40-odd years ago. It's the word that could be used for someone you had probably been intimate with but not necessarily in a relationship with.

[@StormBringare]

I can't decide if the title is moronic or genius. After all, it made me click on the video to see what the lunacy was about.

[@olddirtybasterd-ex2vb]

It's from a book of questions. He didn't make it up.

[@TheWickedWizardOfOz1]

I just choked when I saw it was Lindy and had to check it out xD

[@TimothyDFA1]

i saw it was 11 minutes so i clicked it, if its not 3 minutes that probably means lindy has some crazy take lmao

[@him050]

As a gay guy I can attest that Ryan Gosling is not stupendously attractive. He is by no means ugly, but Henry Cavil he ain't.

[@TheAgamemnon911]

Answering that question is the equivalent of being challenged to cross a minefield on a pogo stick.

[@peterrevens8454]

I will give it a try: No I would not date a "former" lesbian. Every lesb I have met was a horrible person full of hate.

[@WeesloYT]

I’m so glad Lloyd is finally getting through the Q217 book, we still have 173 questions to go!

[@caracallaavg]

Lindy: there's no genetic threat for me Also Lindy: everyone in my family is male

[@appa609]

It shows

[@joejohnson6327]

I'm a gay man & both my husband and I used to pretend we were into women. Should I worry?

[@Your-Least-Favorite-Stranger]

This clearly indicates a history of willful deceit; I'm afraid you're perfect for each other.

[@diazinth]

@@Your-Least-Favorite-Stranger there is the possibility that it was fear driven deceit, rather than willful. :)

[@stadtbekanntertunichtgut]

Thanks for at least trying! A for effort

[@JonTanOsb]

No, dear, that was simply protective camouflage. :) Jon in rural BC, Canada

[@richardhart9204]

… likely means one of you is genuinely attracted to women. 🤔

[@ringthatbell9597]

<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="157">2:37</a> me thinking the video is over when he said ”no” so I go to click off the video and see that there’s still 9 minutes left 💀

[@rp8164]

KZbin, play "My Girlfriend's Girlfriend" by Type O Negative.

[@lasskinn474]

"What would it feel like if the spicy pictures you took for a magazine were watched mostly by people with a different sexual orientation than you?"

[@RDEnduro]

Hahaa good call, wait im stealing this i got another one.

[@kawaiilotus]

@@lasskinn474 the playgirl shoot! funnily enough not read by girls (or more appropriately women ) all that much to Mr Steeles chagrin. fun for all of the friends of Dorothy.

[@Vinemaple]

Damn you, Algorithm, for hiding months of Lindybeige videos from me. Must I scroll through my entire subscribed channels list every time I sit down to watch? I think we have the "universal ick" concept already... the problem is people who push back against others' distress with denial, gaslighting, and shaming, which is neither an old nor a new tactic. Funny twist, though, I've had an unlikely number of experiences where women who seem mentally ill have made aggressive advances on me (I'm a cishet man), and I get that "universal ick" feeling because _I know it would be inappropriate to reciprocate._ I won't give an exact number because I actually have no standing to declare whether or not anyone is mentally ill. But it's interesting that the reaction Lloyd describes can be triggered that way, as well.

[@Luckragol]

that would just mean that wife is bi. my gf was bi, we did good as long as we were together, so, it doesnt matter much. so no worry.

[@noahway13]

I think the book writer intended the book to be read by a group, and the group needs a person like this guy.

[@rickyspanish4792]

It's called bisexual, not lesbian, if they're into both men and women!

[@steemlenn8797]

Technically speaking we don't know if they were bi at the occurence of the "prior lover". We can only assume from the word lover (so not forced) that they were homo. People's preferences - or at least their awareness of them - can change over time.

[@rickyspanish4792]

@@steemlenn8797 that kind of thing doesn't change that much, the awareness sure but than they were still bi, just not aware of it

[@corvus_da]

​@@steemlenn8797can bisexuals not have lovers???

[@erickonami1]

I had a girlfriend who was bisexual and she was exclusively sexually attracted to me during the time we were dating so that fact didn't bother me because I didn't see anyone else as a threat.

[@sjdennis3]

Most women are bisexual to some degree (though most would not admit it openly). This is normal. Women are very huggy with their friends after all. On the other hand, most men are staunchly heterosexual and find men disgusting, and the few who are not are staunchly homosexual and find women disgusting. Men and women are very different, and understanding that explains a lot of the historical reality of marriage (e.g. the fact that polygamy is almost always one man and multiple women).

[@Yarblocosifilitico]

she was bi but only attracted to you during your relationship, but before and after she was attracted to other people? yeah, uhm... I think she might've been telling you what you wanted to hear

[@Rynewulf]

@@Yarblocosifiliticothats just how monogamous relationships work. Pretty bog standard, you decide to date the person you want to be top priority If a straight woman dates a straight guy, its pretty heard of that they'll have eyes for each other during their relationship but have pursued other men/women while they were single.

[@Yarblocosifilitico]

@@Rynewulf exactly. She was still attracted to others but made him her priority. That's how it works indeed. Her not even being attracted to other people... Could be, but I don't buy it.

[@carlosandleon]

Nobody is really exclusively sexually attracted to your partner just because you have a relationship. It’s not like the biological functions turn off. And that’s absolutely fine.

[@rubenskiii]

Is Lindy spending this summer inside answering questions from The Book that was Once Lost but Found Again? Amazing. Have a good day Mr. Beige. Warm greetings from the Netherlands🇳🇱.

[@rmsgrey]

I'm in the "no more than any other ex" camp. Though there is that little corner of my mind that quietly mutters "threesome? poly?", so maybe that should be "slightly less than other exes"... In practice, how I feel about it is going to depend on all three of us involved, and right now I only know who one of the three people would be...

[@hellboystein2926]

'Yeah, theirs a reason for that one Luke!' Made my Day, LOL!

[@JackVermicelli]

I'm reasonably confident he didn't say "theirs" in that context.

[@were-owlinwisconsin4441]

I'm single. I've never been in a romantic relationship, much less gotten married. So if I found out that my wife had previously been in a same-sex relationship, I would definitely have a lot of questions.

[@ew3612]

Man people are so touchy. I will give your video a “like” Lloyd!

[@greed0599]

So lindybeige, you dont find the conventional man attractive, in fact, the opposite... But what about *femboys*

[@foreverdirt1615]

Next video: "Are traps gay?"

[@Djinigami]

@@foreverdirt1615 I would go crazy if he did that

[@Br-Al-De]

Can't wait for that 2-hour video with tangents about the 2,19% stat, genetic threat levels, and maybe some evolutionary psychology thrown in for good measure.

[@alamppmala]

What is the 2, 19 stat? ​@@Br-Al-De

[@vulpes7079]

What, are you gonna try to tempt him? Back off, I saw him first

[@anthonyanderson77]

Gosling has an odd nose structure.

[@0hate9]

god, I was *fully* expecting him to just say "because everyone in my family is *ugly* "

[@LordJazzly]

Oh dear. Well - I'm assuming we're ignoring the case where my mate is also of the same sex as me, and therefore the question becomes 'how would you feel if you learnt your partner had been with another man, before he met you?', which is... I'm much too old to expect a potential partner to have been a virgin before we met, come on. But - in the case of 'How would you feel learning your partner had a girlfriend before she met you?'... honestly, the major concern would be, if I'm finding this out once we're already partners, about how and why she'd kept that information from me, having been together long enough for us to be considered, er, "mates", without my knowing about what _could_ be quite a major component of her sexual and/or romantic preferences. I don't expect to be _part_ of every facet of my partner's life, but if they're not at least comfortable with me knowing some basic information about their overall personal situation... this speaks to potential relationship problems, I think. 'Have you ever been attracted to someone of the same sex?' I think my response to part 1 _might_ imply an answer here; 'How about a relative?' uh. What? I mean - for the sake of fairness, I have an older cousin or two who I can _understand on an abstract conceptual level_ to be attractive persons - but there's some really powerful disgust responses preventing me from even _thinking_ anything more than that. So that's probably a _no_ 'How did you deal with that?' I think I already answered this as well.

[@MrVeps1]

Yeah, the family part of the question says a lot about norms and assumptions when the book was written. I guess it's about close, immediate family, and how you dealt with the taboo, instead of "Could that handsome stranger at the bar have been a cousin eight times removed?". In that case, the answer is no. I know my sister and several cousins to be beautiful and handsome people, but there's definitely no attraction there, more like revulsion whenever the thought of something sexual comes up, brought on, for example, by questions like this.

[@julian281198]

i knew some people who had a game named "willie", they would basically hide naked and hug the person of the group who they would always pick on. These people where also the most homophobic persons i have ever met.

[@av_oid]

Yes, worry. Then ask her for a ménage à trois, which ends being very awkward. Then get jealous, have a fight, move out, start a separation, get divorced, lose half your retirement savings and the house, and then get depressed. Sigh. Screw you Sally and Vicky.

[@olddirtybasterd-ex2vb]

That seems like a "you" problem.

[@ptonpc]

😂

[@Ludwig_Cox]

Lloyd is starting to answer some really weird questions but it makes for some fantastic content haha you can tell this was an old book because this would never be allowed to be printed nowadays

[@unncommonsense]

It depends on what part of Lesbia she was from.

[@williamcampbell6846]

Straightest man in the world Lindybiege

[@appa609]

He's not a boomer he's a Victorian

[@jonathanstern5537]

@@appa609 I was thinking Edwardian because of his interest in archeology and swing dancing.

[@meyr1992]

he likes swords and tanks for goodness sake

[@scorinth]

Hey, I'm here for the swords and tanks, and I'm pretty gay...

[@jonathanstern5537]

@@scorinth next time I go to Dragon Con, I want to have a bag of swords and take before and after pictures of women cosplaying with those swords... handing them a sword I mean, not using it on them.

[@captainahab1533]

What even is that title?

[@RDEnduro]

He's asking should you doubt your relationship if your partners last one was same sex. Its an insecure question to begin with, but why not

[@arnijulian6241]

Genuine Genius! Got a chuckle out of me at least.

[@aaron234567890987643]

​@@RDEnduroat the bare minimum it's insecure, a bit of a dog whistle potentially and just bigoted at the worst

[@7yep4336dfgvvh]

​@@RDEnduro weird question. Relationships are all the same. You come together to mate and breed, you raise the cub(s), then you divorce. People are slaves to their breeding instincts just like any other animal. We just like to pretend it's much more sophisticated and romantic

[@Blox117]

@@aaron234567890987643 maybe you're just woke. yes the question doesnt make sense, but you're just projecting all these things out.

[@dylanbarton121]

This is like watching someone cross a room littered with security lasers without setting one off. Jesus, it’s Jason borne.

[@dugs2366]

Nice analogy. I was on the edge of my seat the whole time.

[@JohnMiller-zr8pl]

A lawyer could win or lose a case but always is paid for the work done. So yes Lindybeige you're right.

[@CoffeeCup1346]

I mean, it depends on what she says next. If she says “Well, I went through this conversion therapy program, and I’m cured now!” then yes, be worried for her health. Whereas if she says “Well, through therapy Ive come to discover I’m attracted to men as well” then we’re probably all good.

[@TheKinoCorner]

I won’t tolerate Ryan Gosling slander

[@atinofspam3433]

Bisexual is a thing, and like anything sexuality is a spectrum, so basically, doesn’t really matter, as long as they’re loyal etc etc

[@Kudykun]

Every girl I had a crush on ended up being a lesbian funny enough, jokes on them, my first actual relationship was with a man. Was a weird experience when puberty hit and I started liking both. I do wonder if I do date a women what she would think if I revealed that.

[@Jorvaskrr]

That's something the field experts would call a "red flag".

[@theodentherenewed4785]

You did a great job with the title - it suggests that you share your personal story about your wife. I prefer for this question to be a theoretical wager for me too - if she changed to the opposite sex, she may want to go back to the same sex one day too.

[@annaniskanen2557]

"Good looking" and "sexy" are very different things when it comes to men - from female perspective, that is. They can coincide, of course, but it is also quite common that they don't. I think Benedict Cumberbatch is even a better example than Ryan Gosling considering that he very much not a traditionally handsome man but is seen as very very sexy by a large number of women.

[@Hesnotoneofus]

I thought it was interesting Lindy said about arbitrary labels of colour. Nature may have only one rule for the whole colour spectrum which does not presuppose any specific experience of a colour. To me by having a pre-set experience of a colour you are adding an additional rule or swathe of rules, for x amount of colours, red, yellow, blue etc, all needing some additional rule... so not being as frugal.

[@idiotproofdalek]

Are these following the algorithm or is it a genuine evolution of the channel? Cos I prefer the long form videos about military stuff and history.

[@zakk143]

As a straight man, if my partner was bi or had experimented before - then no, that doesn't bother me. I was still picked in the end. If my partner was a lesbian who was denying that part of themselves, then I would 100% be concerned because I would want them to be happy regardless of whether I am in their life or not (and keeping such a key part as your sexuality boxed in is far from healthy). As for the double-standard, that situation you described is absolutely troubling. No matter the gender or context, if Person A makes advances on Person B that have been clearly communicated as UNWANTED, I believe that's harassment pure and simple. It's ick regardless of the genders, orientations, etc.

[@Mr-Tibbster]

For people complaining about this video, Lindy has been doing this Q217 questionnaire for seven years, it's nothing new. It's part of his classical content, you can even check out his playlist.

[@AnthonyHigham6414001080]

With 1.24M subscribers he must be doing something right 😂

[@Treblaine]

<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="435">7:15</a> that just reveals the "privilege stack" in our supposedly more equal and fair society.

[@arthurdowney2846]

My fiance is pansexual, and prefers women. Let's just say that I am wholly and enthusiastically supportive of her escapades.

[@pbjandahighfive]

You don't have a whole lot of self-respect, do you?

[@Cjuo]

“There’s a reason for that Luke” 😂

[@EASYTIGER10]

As a heterosexual, I've sometimes wondered if homosexual people are actively repelled by the idea of sexual intimacy with the opposite sex or just feel utterly indifferent to it.

[@danieldeanhodge]

They would feel the exact same way you would feel in a relationship with somebody of the same sex. It's just a flip.

[@legitplayin6977]

I guess it depends on the person. On my side, I’m 100% repulsed by the thought

[@Cyrenetes]

As someone who was straight (+male) earlier in life but have now gone on to prefer men, I strongly believe men being repulsed by men is largely if not entirely a societal thing. If even I who is clearly not inherently biologically repulsed by men, could have been so repulsed by men, where could that feeling have come from?

[@AdamOwenBrowning]

@@Cyrenetes maybe your own feelings of shame, fear, etc? some dudes are find the idea of being intimate with other men disgusting because they're boring ol' regular-straight. Plenty of bisexual dudes in denial, sure. Most men are boring and straight though I'm afraid. The feelings of repulsion come from the fact you're aware your mates may judge you differently if they know you suck dicks, that's where it comes from lol, that's social. They may judge you differently because their feeling of repulsion IS inherently biological to them, so they can't properly understand why you'd do something that creates an instinctive feeling of revulsion in them.

[@alexandrub8786]

As i heard it depends on the person whatever they are indifferent or repulsed.

[@Rajaat99]

When I first met a cousin of mine, I thought she was cute. Then, I found out she was my cousin and she was no longer cute.

[@jcorbett9620]

The only winner/s ever is any situation that necessitates the need for them, are lawyers. Win, lose or draw, they get the fat fees. One of the (many) reasons that 100% of non-lawyers, generally regard them in non-favourable terms, sometimes justifiably. I also remember the episode of Q.I. that you were referring to, and Emma Thompson didn't exactly go to Stephens house, they were students at the time and shared a house (with a couple of others) which is why he was sort of trapped, because the other rooms were locked as their occupiers weren't present.

[@justynmatlock8873]

She could be Bi-Sexual. Or she could have identified as a Lesbian in the past, and doesn't now. Sexuality is be fluid for many people.

[@russellblachere5492]

As a student of biology, the universal ick doesnt make much sense to me because there is no evolutionary pressures (out side of like colorblindness which is a loss of function) on how we see color. On the contrary nature in fact wants to change whatever it can about someone to see if it gives them and advantage, so assuming (like you do) that perception of color is largely genetic, people should have a vastly different perception of color.

[@steemlenn8797]

You know about that colorblind people are better spotters in the military? You know about that color circle where one culture sees a different color, and another culture not? (Just furthering your studies ;) )

[@corvus_da]

"Genetic threat"?? Do you actually care about passing on your genes?? Either way, I don't see how her sexuality matters in that regard. Whether she leaves you and has kids with another man, or leaves you for a woman and has no kids at all, the result for you would be the same

[@TheYrthenarc]

The genetic threat in this case would be unknowingly raising the child of another man, not losing the mate.

[@donkeldoothedapperdog]

Lloyd back again with the *interesting* video titles

[@stronggirlsuperheroineonli5094]

In the Emma Thompson case, that combo gets a social pass due to abcense of clear physical threat.

[@PeterT-i1w]

what do you mean "was"? it's like that meme "Years ago ... I was Chinese", lol

[@jimbob3332]

I mean... I'd kind of consider that a requirement. But to flip it as 'not a gold star' then I can't be at all reasonable in being unnerved. Everyone takes time figuring out things about themselves.

[@Deinonuchus]

"There's a reason for that, Luke." 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 As for the questions: I would not have bee surprised, nor threatened, if my wife had had a same-sex romantic relationship in the past. Why would I? And attracted to a family member? Do first-cousins count? As for the Emma Thompson story (I did see that episode, BTW), I think it gets a laugh because few people think a man getting chased around by a naked woman as a threat. The other combinations you mentioned cross the reasonable threat threshold and become threatening.

[@AdmiralLj]

There is a phenomenon that happens with children who have been adapted or conceived whit donated sperms when they meet their parents as teens or adults they are sexuali attracted to them, It can create some very disturbing problems.

[@cadenceclearwater4340]

The layers always win.

[@cadenceclearwater4340]

*Lawyers 🤦🏼‍♀️

[@ASBO_LUTELY]

My cousin was a fox, always fancied her but then as it turned out so did lots of other much better looking men. Strange that!

[@conorlynch2879]

As far as I know, Stephen Fry and Emma Thompson have been very close friends for decades. Just to give a bit of context to the otherwise slightly uncomfortable anecdote.

[@bilalsadiq1450]

Yep, it's definitely an older book. Many people are openly bi or pansexual nowadays, so many probably wouldn't care. If you really like someone, then why would you be particularly worried if your partner has a wider potential dating pool?

[@LordZylok]

Exactly. It would be like worrying about your spouse being drop-dead gorgeous, smart, and having a great personality, because that might attract "competetors" for their affection. Paranoia levels of worrying.

[@Infinite_Jester]

This is really applying the modern perspective to historical people. If some action was deemed deeply immoral, probably the cause for concern was moral and not practical, as you're implying here. If your partner used to own slaves, do you also take that to mean your partner is wealthy, probably has good genes/social standing and a strong education? Or would you be concerned this person might have some moral failing?

[@tombogan03884]

If you changed her mind you needn't worry at all .

[@davey1602]

Emma Thompson comes across as a bored socialite and will play that sort of game because she is immune to consequences. I don't know if they're still friends but I would think both parties pass it off as just a bit of fun. Emma was probably miffed that Stephen did not find her attractive.

[@appa609]

Honestly most of the girls I've dated have been with other girls

[@ezforsaken]

are you european/usa? what you said is the total opposite here (latam) (just curious!)

[@TheDeadbone1961]

"There's a reason for that Luke." :D

[@rafchris]

The ick sounds close to a phobia. For instance my wife gets the ick when she sees a spider. I too have an ick as I would rather not handle it but on balance it's probably not poisonous, and the risk is low. I.e. a irrational fear vs a rational fear. I think this is also linked to behavioural traits such as perception, anxiety and over analysis. Beyond that it all gets abit Fruedian!

[@hanssmidt12]

I'm confused how this channel switched from history to this. Quite interesting though

[@Nantosuelta]

What actually happened!? I used to watch his history videos and loving them, been subscribed for ages, but recently his video titles have seemed "different"

[@hanssmidt12]

@@Nantosuelta I don't know, it just happened. I am subscribed for like 5 years

[@stevensimpson3252]

@@Nantosuelta he produces videos on whatever interests him, including history...

[@foreverdirt1615]

He always made videos about random subjects but when he got that Q217 book years ago he said he'd do all the questions, so now he's finally devoting real time to getting through the questions he ignored for years.

[@ArifRWinandar]

@@Nantosuelta Lindy bought a book of interesting questions years ago and started a series of videos where he answers the questions asked in the book. He did it regularly up until a few years ago, and only recently returned to do the series. There's a playlist of these videos on the channel if you're interested.

[@peripheralarbor]

There's a great looking guy at the local icecream shop. I could see how someone could be attracted to him.

[@DmSereb]

If my wife had had an intimate relationships with another woman i would ask her to tell me all the details, how it felt, how is it different and so forth. Because apperantly i can not have such an experience

[@DomCombatVids]

What is that title, Lloyd

[@tocatcha6969]

Calm down fella

[@Zayphar]

What is important is loyalty...faithfulness. If they are now loyal to me, what happened in the past just doesn't matter.

[@erickonami1]

<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="310">5:10</a> That's funny because I just rewatched The Empire Strikes Back this evening.

[@ezforsaken]

why is everyone talking about the question? like why is most people here attacking the question ? is it because it's a judgy question? is it because it doesn't take into consideration everyone's feelings? Is it because it will assume everyone should be straight? Questions can be whatever they want to be, and true responses should always be the truth. The question is targeted to straight and more conservative people and having them have a chance to express what they actually think and feel, even if it can be judgy or critique others, that's how they feel and that's also valid. Humanity doesn't have to be in full agreement all the time, straight men can say "i do feel insecure about me and about my partner leaving me for someone of their same sex, I do feel insecure about her staying over at her female friend, fully knowing she use to date other women back then". Why should we mock and laugh at the fact the conservative straight person can have some insecurities? Don't we all have insecurities in some shape or form?

[@stowlicters8362]

I have a question, why is racism bad and why does youtube censor comments?

[@hebl47]

I'd say this "universal ick" is only shared between the same culture. Or even subculture. It's really not universal between all humans.

[@enormhi]

What a silly question, if the wife was a lesbian once, they'll still be.

[@willg9106]

I'd argue the harassing of is more socially acceptable in general. As a teenager my coworkers were mostly older women, and I had many very inappropriate things said to me. I think women are far less likely to escalate that to physical harassment, hence why it's not seen as such a big deal.

[@cuddlemuffin44]

I would pay 18 fat, gold Sacagaweas for another British Mark IV video.

[@ceresbane]

You can already tell from his immediate answer of "I don't know, it depends." Already implies how little it matters on principle. Its less of an issue of the past history or even if the past history was gay. But more to do with the exact individual in question. No bigotry or ideology about it whether by culture or religion. Just objective pragmatism of the facts of the matter than the implications of the hypothetical which requires preconceived notions. Immediately skipped right over the obvious trappings of the question.

[@radfoxuk8113]

Always interesting to see what slang from the younger generation(s) gets passed up to the oldwr generations, like Rizz and Ick, I honestly see people Gen Xray and older use these slang more than people my age, Gen Zed, and younger. Though I am rather an introvert, so my perspective is pretty narrow.

[@kylie_h1978]

My wife is a lesbian, I have no issues with it.

[@BjornTheDim]

Presumably, if I found myself attracted to someone of the same sex, I simply wouldn't have sex with them. I've been successfully not having sex with more than 99% of the attractive people I know.

[@MrVeps1]

I guess "No, no and no!" would not make for an interesting video. There's this weird idea that if a woman, or person in general, is bi, they are more likely to stray. I suspect this is true only insofar as their partner believing them more likely to stray, and becoming estranged and distant as a result, might indeed push them away, and into the arms of another person. If you have a committed and strong monogamous relationship, fleeting attraction to people outside the relationship shouldn't matter. A friend of mine is bisexual, but for the last twelve years or so she has been with her now husband and the father of her child. Whenever someone implies bisexuals are promiscuos, I always remember one of the kindest and most devoted persons I know saying "Yes, I'm attracted to women as well, but it doesn't exactly matter anymore". Anecdotal to be sure, but that's my opinion, informed by personal experience.

[@rionthemagnificent2971]

If she was a lesbian prior to meeting you and you had relations with her.. Then that means she's no longer Lesbian, but Bisexual. Its perfectly fine to date a bisexual person, their preferences don't affect who they are. They could be a saint, or a pile of crap. As long as you and her are happy together, that's all that matters.

[@MrVeps1]

Yeah, only problem is, now his wife would have to hand her membership card back in😂 One of my exes actually had a "habit" (two or three times in a row) of turning bisexual men straight, we'd joke, since they had been attracted to men as well in the hormonal throes of puberty, but were only attracted to women after dating her for a while. A complete coincidence, of course, but a marrige is a relationship between two people, not between genders, and what matters is if you're attracted to and love your spouse specifically, not if you're attracted to their gender generally.

[@vulpes7079]

Nah, of she's a lesbian and even considered having relations with him then she was always bi. Bisexuality is its own thing and it doesn't depend on who you've screwed I know a guy who's really attracted to women, but he's always ended up in relationships with men

[@eerohongisto821]

I wouldn't mind my partner having past lesbian relatioships as much as heterosexual ones. The reason being i would not have to compete with her ex as she has very different things to offer, as opposed to a male ex lover i would feel like i have to be better in every way (and this is also true, women often compare their current partner to the best aspects of their previous relationships. Thats why women find titanic so romantic and why you should find a woman with minimal bodycount)

[@ezforsaken]

most straight women I know find the idea of a dominant guy just 'taking them' and ramming into them, way way way way sexier that whatever good technique is used downstairs. The technique could be supreme, but it doesn't matter. Humans can orgasm with extreme ease if their minds are very excited. Just remember your youngster days, that first time you had with a girl you really liked, it was so new so amazing she barely touched you, and on your mind you kept screaming to yourself 'dont come dont come yet dont dont its too soon doooonntt!!'; why such an urge when her technique wasn't even that good? being excited > technique most women are more excited about a relentlessness dominant penetrator than lvl 100 finger/tongue

[@JR-tl2ym]

I've been told by women I'm attractive, but I honestly don't get it. Being too hetero is detrimental to your dating life. Straight men benefit by being slightly bisexual and thus more aware of the female gaze.

[@xCorvus7x]

Where did you learn about these attempts to raise children together so that they marry each other that failed because the children in question understood each other as siblings?

[@JordanJJereb]

Clickbate title got me lol.

[@DUCKDUDE4100]

As a guy who finds other guys attractive I find Ryan Gosling to be kinda ugly.