"Why don't you leave if you feel I am not the right person for you?" This exact phrase I kept on hearing for one year and then the phone call got disconnected and I got blocked for days until I requested him through mail to unblock me. But anyways after being in a hell for 1.5 years finally cut off all the communications and went no contact from last 31 days. And will never entertain that jerk ever.
@dianaalyssa8726 Жыл бұрын
My father narc would always say/shout to my mother, "you'll never leave me!" Well, we did. Been NC 3 years from my covert/malignant narc. He caused a lot of drama.
@johnkennedy8795 Жыл бұрын
Good Luck to you ....I'm only 4 days in no contact.Sooo hard but I'm not taking physical violence any more
@scc4348 Жыл бұрын
He said if I’m such a bad person then why don’t you leave. So I left. And then he said I was bad and cruel for leaving him when he had nothing 😂
@amberp5207 Жыл бұрын
I literally had this argument with my husband today and it was almost word for word😩
@amberp5207 Жыл бұрын
@@scottallen277 thank u so much for this information. I’m so glad that u for the answers that u needed so u could move one. I wish u all the best, now and in the future❤️
@scottallen277 Жыл бұрын
@@amberp5207 you can contact him
@amberp5207 Жыл бұрын
@@scottallen277 thank u. Unfortunately, we have a 3 year old daughter that is behind on her speech and can only say words but no phrases or sentences. It’s a long hard road, but I’ve been assured that she’ll b talking, that is is just a very long process to get there. With that being said, I can only depend on my oldest daughter to watch her and feel secure that nobody would do anything to her and me not know about it. This has kept me in this marriage that has been a total fraud. Now, I have to make the very hard decision whether to leave or to stay. He convinced me to quit my job and then we decided to have a baby together, but I thought it was bc he loved me and wanted to start a family with me bc his last one fell apart and his sons from a previous marriage weren’t speaking to him. Really, having our daughter was just revenge on his part against his ex-wife and 2 sons. 2 weeks to the day that our daughter was born, he wrecked his truck and me and her ceased to exist after that. All he cared about was getting another truck. We had another vehicle, but he didn’t give me and our daughter a 2nd look after that. That day, that’s when the devaluation period started. The lecturing, yelling, cussing, screaming and so on. It’s only been in the last year that I’ve learned about narcissistic abuse. Right now, I’m just sitting here trying to figure out my eventual escape plan bc I know it’s not a matter of “IF” it’s just a matter of “WHEN.”
@amberp5207 Жыл бұрын
@@scottallen277 also, I’m 45, had already had 4 children from a previous marriage and at 41, started completely over with a new baby. I love her with all my heart, but it has really held me back from doing what I know I need to do, which is to get out of this relationship. Thank u for reaching out to me. I really appreciate it
@scottallen277 Жыл бұрын
@@amberp5207 he helped me so many times
@wilblissful Жыл бұрын
This is so extremely calm in comparison to what actually happens..
@MichelleMM-e8j Жыл бұрын
Thank you Danish. This reminds me of how my now ex husband, after a lot of persuasion to try to fix our 26.5 years of marriage by going to an organisation (called 'Relate' in the UK) the Therapist asked bluntly " Why are you still together?". This shook me but my then husband said which shook me to the core even more, " Well SHE has no money, SHE has no job and SHE has no where to go"! 😳 This was the wake up call I needed. Over the years he devalued every job I had worked, he wanted me to be dependent on him financial as a form of control & over the years had progressively anialated me from all my friends. I have been single since 2009 to the present day 2022 and am loving it!
@GoodKarmaWellness Жыл бұрын
All facts…. Praying for those in recovery ❤️🩹
@kayjohns7936 Жыл бұрын
Thank you. I need it.
@JohnGalt1960 Жыл бұрын
She would say "why don't you leave?" And when I left she would say "why did you leave?".....round in circles......finally I left and refused to go back or even speak to her......years later and she still doesn't understand.
@michaelleonard2440 Жыл бұрын
I understand that
@COSMIXA Жыл бұрын
They also say : "Just imagine I'm dead, what will you do then?"
@Jennifermcintyre Жыл бұрын
He yells and screams at me and slams the door.. comes back to me crying and wants to know what my problem is… he claims he hasn’t yelled at me… there’s no communicating with a narcissist.
@kiransagar8557 Жыл бұрын
Danish you are 100 percent perfect in what we have actually faced and can't even think of it. Thank you for great work
@AA-nx2jz Жыл бұрын
Literally i had this conversation with my ex husband many a times.His words used to be " U keep talking n talking" . Nobody around u can understand, how much it effects your mental health when u want to talk n resolve things and your partner behave like this(the narc guy in the video)
@danieller32153 ай бұрын
Same experience ugh so draining. Thank god you left him good for you.
@Liksterr97 Жыл бұрын
Same argument three times in a row….I’ll never forget it.
@kayjohns7936 Жыл бұрын
Male or female, they are bas#ards!
@rivkaruthgolan Жыл бұрын
So happy that as soon as a new acquaintance starts to talk this way, I don’t ask or tell anything. If I hear toxicity, I don’t answer. They apologize. I tell them nicely that I think well of them but I must go because I don’t want to take the risk of experiencing this again. It works.
@emmanuelking9988 Жыл бұрын
Awesome 👏👏👏👏👏 Stay strong 💪
@ayanajohnson2155 Жыл бұрын
That's a wise response
@KK-ex3ej Жыл бұрын
Brilliantly done, you notice the lack of empathy in the covert arguments, started by them, gaslighted by them and they swerve a resolve until you give in to their demand of complete submission to them. Loop the loop ➰
@dianaalyssa8726 Жыл бұрын
Great reenactment. I know mine were different, I got word saladed, like we'd talk/argue/debate one thing and he'd steer the conversation somewhere else in the land of magical unicorn word salads, would be confused sometimes after what was talked about.
@rosethorne9155 Жыл бұрын
This is how conversations with my mom happen, 80% of the time. (The other 20% we are in public so she fakes being nice.) Thank you so much for doing this work!!!
@dennisahlarson1584 Жыл бұрын
Had 3 of these conversations with my 88 year old Grandpa today. I could not get him to stay on topic or progress the conversation to a natural end. He also gaslit me multiple times when he couldn't get me to react . I stayed calm and clear the entire time, which seems to irritate him. He would project negative ideas onto me as if they came from me and would try to turn our mutual agreements into arguments as if my words of agreement were counterpoints. Narcissists are ridiculous! Always innocent, always right and most importantly, the center of attention. There is a saying that talks about not being angry with a clown for acting like a clown when you keep going to the circus. I have been learning how to leave the room as soon as the music starts. He can put on his show without me being the audience.
@yellowbird619 Жыл бұрын
Thank you for these, they keep me from wondering what I'm missing.
@Fururu333 Жыл бұрын
Omg how insanely accurate the first part of the narcissist talking is.
@andreamerino Жыл бұрын
You should do more clips like this ! Excellent!
@Lyndsydypyty Жыл бұрын
Mine was Never this calm. But he did answer with questions. But mostly attacks. Never once had an actual conversation like this one. I could count on one hand how many times ive been been able to finish a sentence!! 🤬🤬
@ChantalesprettylittleDIYS Жыл бұрын
This is so triggering of how accurate this is. It was always me, I was always the problem.
@rm3015 Жыл бұрын
Oh Danish, you've been speaking with my ex😂. Irony is that when I did leave him, he hoovered, called up my family/friends telling them "she screwed up such a beautiful relationship". How he's going to die! That was 2 years ago and he's still sending flying monkeys.
@theguynextdoor4978 Жыл бұрын
Yup. Been through this non-sense. Circular arguments are done to wear people out until they agree with the narcissist just to get out of the discussion. The narcissist gets supply from our emotional responses, and wearing us out.
@nejolo95639 ай бұрын
Well said and because the narcissist doesn’t have a conscious he will never be exhausted and can continue on with his or her next manipulation. But then again my narcissist brother is also bipolar and OCD and forgetful so I got a heavy duty issue dealing with him. So best thing to do is avoid them and try not to bring resentment into your thoughts otherwise they live in your head.
@leticiamilo4387 Жыл бұрын
Thanks Danish!❤⚘ Your videos are awesome! Learning with your teachings!
@gionagrace6279 Жыл бұрын
110 % correct!
@zoejaiattoh1243 Жыл бұрын
Damn that just took me in another space .. whoooo I’m glad that time period has ended ..
@olapiotrowska42282 ай бұрын
Jesus... he was doing this exact thing to me EVERY TIME and it always left me so confused! I left him 3 weeks ago and thank god I did! Its like rebirth- my intuition was right this whole time (5 years). DO NOT IGNORE YOUR INTUITION Thank you for this video ♡
@PushingThroughThePain Жыл бұрын
my wife was a master at circular arguments! ugh...
@Tiffany_3x Жыл бұрын
🥀 When you say "my wife was...", are you saying you're still married and that she *was* able to "correct" that issue (@ least) ??
@PushingThroughThePain Жыл бұрын
@@Tiffany_3x I'm saying that I'm separated after I found out that she's been cheating on me. She then left our boys and I to go live with her new boyfriend. She still is a master of circular arguments, but I don't have to deal with her 24/7 anymore! Divorce is pending...
@funkymonk542 Жыл бұрын
@@PushingThroughThePain good for you man . I know how you feel my ex wife left me and our three kids . They’re all grown up now and they never forget who was there for them ✌️
@PushingThroughThePain Жыл бұрын
@@funkymonk542 thanks for sharing your story with me! It brings me hope
@francesbernard24459 ай бұрын
Thank you for doing these role plays for us. Now that I am in a safe place it is helping me see the humor in what I have gone through while letting go of the past. That was not marriage.
@secureafuturewithnatasha-m6297 Жыл бұрын
Wow that sounds like a conversation I just had. Scary
@cayotelives Жыл бұрын
Basically they push back the blame to you hahaha
@user-xw1hf Жыл бұрын
Same conversation with my mother
@Richard-vq7ud Жыл бұрын
It is all the exact same shit no matter who it is...spouse, partner, friend, boss, coworker, sibling, parent.
@chucknastyness Жыл бұрын
I mean, he did make a good point. "Why are you still here?" When the truth is hiding in plain sight.
@falishatucker3486 Жыл бұрын
I'm confused because both sounds like a narcissist
@truthh8597 Жыл бұрын
Danish is so cute in this one He knows it all by now
@tameshacaldwell9432 Жыл бұрын
This is scary how accurate this is
@gracegwozdz8185 Жыл бұрын
They emit, never receive. Evil creatures.
@nejolo95639 ай бұрын
Yeah but they popular with everyone they flatter. Very good at first impressions but only those close to them know how they really are.
@karenhenry2430 Жыл бұрын
Very real, used to experience it
@soeumsoeun4646 Жыл бұрын
No more drama. I divorced him 2 weeks ago. In the court hearing, he tried the last blow to smear my name. It was like a circus 🎪. I was glad to have it done.
@sameehasworld515510 ай бұрын
I’m proud of you
@louisemichelsen986 Жыл бұрын
Just like my husband 🙈
@Yo.222 Жыл бұрын
Just run no need to argue with those crazy people.
@Xwaterwicca Жыл бұрын
Same words…. I’m finally at peace
@grosbeak6130 Жыл бұрын
Interesting. I don't know which one is which.
@Richard-vq7ud Жыл бұрын
Yes. I thought the same thing. After a while i think we get so sucked in it becomes like that.
@sophiachin1262 Жыл бұрын
Yea but it goes on for 10 hours they talk in circles. I like straight lines they get you to a point. I learned about all these narco demons with my last ex and the minute I saw that persona and spirit pop up in a new person I met.. By week 1 it was clearly he was being abusive and mean and by week 2 I gave him a bunch of departing gifts and blessed him goodbye. Who but a demon gets mad every minute and is mean to the best lady they every met or probly ever will. BOY BYE. Love loves love. Haters gotta go. I'm too wonderful for all dat bruh.
@vlondmaggie24 Жыл бұрын
This is so relatable
@user-og7hj9bs2z Жыл бұрын
Wow this is spot on!! 😮😮😮
@melodyslocum2311 Жыл бұрын
If narcissist never change it's just a waste of time to be around them communicate with them
@vaaniv9442 Жыл бұрын
My husband would ask me to leave the relationship and go to my mom's house were I could happily live, which he very well know that a woman without her husband can never live a dignified life in the society.
@dgexpressllc7450 Жыл бұрын
sorry you can't live a dignified life in your society. In American culture you sure can! Living proof.
@ShisimodoExperiance Жыл бұрын
I had 100000 arguments that sent me nuts and always got told if I'm so bad f me off.. then 10 mins later acting like a friend while my brain blowing up.. so accurate
@ranjaniraon1322 Жыл бұрын
Ditto conversation between me and my narcissistic ex 😭
@edvails1539 Жыл бұрын
It's such a familiar conversation.
@user-yz7gk7fl1e Жыл бұрын
Big thumbs up
@heikekershaw8990 Жыл бұрын
My son used the same words to me 😢
@sparrowspotty Жыл бұрын
Jeez "if I'm so bad why are you with me?" I'm triggered by. If I hear that once I'm gone.
@rashi436 Жыл бұрын
Oh god! The accuracy!!
@TheRawKrystal Жыл бұрын
I would get the, “I really feel like you just don’t like me at all…” At that point, I really didn’t. Who would like a person like this? Trauma bonds are a bitch.
@dgffrhhhx Жыл бұрын
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@Karin_and_Bim Жыл бұрын
that is me and my narc talking 😒
@sameehasworld515510 ай бұрын
Lol 😂
@queenofpeaceandlove1413 Жыл бұрын
So on point.
@rebeccahummel1931 Жыл бұрын
Wow! Exactly.
@ishwaryahanvika5946 Жыл бұрын
Very true....exactly
@GoddessYvonne3 Жыл бұрын
Luvs it!💞❤️💞No he's not leaving
@Nicolecooper961 Жыл бұрын
I witnessed this with the ex narc it become's draining.😈
@manknowsnothing3796 Жыл бұрын
Damnit! You hit every corner
@ThingsILike12 Жыл бұрын
Someone needs to pay for air time during the Super Bowl in the States to run this as a PSA. Too many of us are having the exact pointless discussion that always ends in “why are you with me then?”. I left one night after he said it. I came back because I didn’t know what he was. Run that PSA.
@sameehasworld515510 ай бұрын
Omg, this so accurate my ex narc said everything in this video. He used to say it you not me the problem is you not me . Everthing is about you . He is blocked everywhere trash evil person . Un empathic person they’re horrible human beings I don’t even have a words anymore
@nisha8500 Жыл бұрын
OMG ... This is so relatable ..
@sandy051987111 ай бұрын
Yep my whole ten year relationship smh it was horrible
@krystalbeth Жыл бұрын
My company loves doing this to people. This is the entire management
@Richard-vq7ud Жыл бұрын
Yes. This is all the exact same torture no matter where it comes from...spouse, partner, workplace, friend, sibling, family, parent. Their goal is confusion, chaos, destruction.
@rondaallen559 ай бұрын
Wow. Like this is my everyday issue , i try to stay silent so i wont get dragged into a manufactured argument. Its so unhealthy. I'm ready to get out.
@shehnazhassankeshwani2997 Жыл бұрын
All this happened just this afternoon..
@andybankston84139 ай бұрын
I’m torn, the exact thing happens multiple times a week almost verbatim. All the signs tell me to get out, run, save yourself. My fear of loosing everything I’ve worked so hard to get and accomplish, my 6 year old daughter being already alienated towards me. Pension, 401k, stocks, IRA’s. I’m certain that I’m trauma bonded, I’m very jumpy and agitated now, I avoid confrontation out of fear of the abuse yet I struggle to get away. It’s literally the hardest emotional and mental hurdle I’ve ever dealt with. What makes it the hardest is being a 40 yld male, fit, in good health and raised to be a southern gentleman. It’s a real mind f__k and it’s draining me
@questshun8087 ай бұрын
OMFG! Yup been here and worse.
@crystalinabacteria3430 Жыл бұрын
My sister doesn't reply to my texts when I try to let her know how our dad is with his progressive illness. She has no urgency but chooses to ignore me when it suits her. She has 2 personalities I call her Jekyll & Hyde. She has the I'm ignoring you personality & she has the over the top, extra nice once in a blue moon personality
@musaleoz9140 Жыл бұрын
Sir true 100%
@coma462410 ай бұрын
From a narcissists pov; you "non" narcissist are never wrong, ever. Its always the narcissist😉
@bochristo4346 Жыл бұрын
Spot on😅
@greatestguitar1 Жыл бұрын
Wow!!! So true
@marisapaola9010 Жыл бұрын
Actions speak louder than words with narc family members..they need an easy target to unleash their own built up aggression on. It's not even about what the victim has done 'wrong'. They just need a punching bag. They brown nose strangers, then unleash behind closed doors because they resented being subservient to them. Fckd up.
@phoenixrising8007 Жыл бұрын
Circular, more like they go off in a zillion directions, all over the map yet going nowhere.
@TheRawKrystal Жыл бұрын
It’s absolutely exhausting and I called it talking in spirals, not just circles 😵💫 wheels are spinning but you’re not going anywhere
@OneWhoKnowz Жыл бұрын
My gf said I don’t think you like me. She says this all the time. That’s her insecurity and trauma talking
@jananabanana3180 Жыл бұрын
Don't waste your breath...!!!!
@alabama.worley9 ай бұрын
This is still a dream exchange. The narc would typically be raging, making as much noise as possible like a territorial animal, or if this is a covert (I'm assuming), they wouldn't even allow you that much respect and civility to express yourself. I appreciate the message though. Thank you!
@gokcencankayasen9609 Жыл бұрын
this is the best video ever
@samlev5997 Жыл бұрын
I can’t tell who is the Narcissist & who is the WHIMP
@andreashinsg Жыл бұрын
Happens all the time
@dgffrhhhx Жыл бұрын
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@pebbles92able11 ай бұрын
I am twitching as i watch this lol
@dlorend Жыл бұрын
This is the last 5 "arguments" almost verbatim. I'm telling y'all these people are possessed by demons. Why do they all sound EXACTLY the same? That's supernatural 🤷🏻♀️🤢🤮
@rosecubbage1774 Жыл бұрын
perfect
@avukat.ilhan.subasi11 ай бұрын
Isnt this how women make arguments?
@courtneyclinch376 Жыл бұрын
Oh my gosh haha Me and my ex exactlyyy
@Merbella11 ай бұрын
They have narcissistic rage sessions and later chastise you for raising your voice and speaking with emotion say "don't you see yourself? You are always right!" Classic gaslighting.
@musaleoz9140 Жыл бұрын
narrists she blame me all the time this that you wrong she tell to leave the relationship that is the point argument narrists do
@Gigantickification Жыл бұрын
Which one is the Narcissist person here? I see both of them have the tendency of being one
@AMightyFortress Жыл бұрын
Exactly my thought 😅
@TheRawKrystal Жыл бұрын
I thought the same. This is more like how our conversations went after almost a decade, so it’s my opinion that the victim has been conditioned to communicate this way, too. It’s absolutely exhausting and I called it talking in spirals, not just circles 😵💫
@truthisinfinite8 Жыл бұрын
This reminds me of an argument with an old friend.
@c.j.peterson894 Жыл бұрын
I wish I could leave my narcissistic sociopath husband but he has made it impossible for me to leave! I have no money to be on my own! I wish I could just die sometimes, just to get away from this horrible life of mine!!
@kanonaride Жыл бұрын
Omg! I'm in the same boat! I hate him so bad yet can't walk away as bad as I (think) want to. He controls every aspect of my life. Slowly he has stripped me of me. I've been in the discarded phase of the relationship for 8 years now. We've had sex once this year!!!! I asked him when was the last time we had sex. He said "last month, you don't remember? I can't believe you don't remember!!" Unbelievable! I feel your pain! It's a living nightmare!!
@yumna3858 Жыл бұрын
Hey Dad pls stop! 🤣🤣
@jamjarthecat4205 Жыл бұрын
I got confused with which Danish was the narcissist... Maybe it's because when my narcissist, the one who lives in my house decides to list my every fault, because I am so awful, I am the one that ends up saying 'What's keeping you here? Why do you stay if I'm so horrible?' He never has an answer for that. It must be because it's convenient to live here and he enjoys putting me through hell. I can't say a word without risking starting him off. Anyway...
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@hawaiigirl8089 Жыл бұрын
Oh I see you met my ex husband the 235 lb toddler who makes cray cray never ending same topic conversation