Never Too Late To Come Out As Transgender: Heartfelt Stories

A series of films about trans people's concerns about getting older and how they have navigated the NHS. This was made for the Trans Ageing And Care Project, to voice the stories and concerns of older trans people, a group who are finally able to grow old. We filmed with Dave and his partner Donna, with retired airline pilot Cat Burton, artist Annabelle and Fran, who no longer wishes to wait to live her life as a transgender woman. This project involved trans people every step of the way. Thanks to everyone involved.
NOTE: Subtitles to be added in the next 5 days. Sorry for the delay.
We launched a social media campaign called #GrowingOlderAsMe. The campaign highlights the hopes fears and thoughts that trans people are having about growing older as trans.
Through working on this project, we have learned a great deal about some of the challenges facing older trans people. Many fear how they will be received by staff or other people living in care homes, and if their needs will be met. As Catherine Burton, a sixty-six year old retired pilot, said:
“[...] transgender people might have needs that are not necessarily obvious to care workers. A trans woman that suddenly isn’t capable of looking after her facial hair in a way that she has grown accustomed to, or a trans woman that has to wear a wig, and then has to be seen by care workers without it, who may not perhaps take the greatest care of presenting them to the other people living in the home.”
Other issues include assumptions care workers might have about their body parts, specific care that they might need due to having had surgery (or not), and the frightening thought of getting dementia and not remembering that they had physically and socially transitioned. This is a real fear for many and is already happening, as Jenny-Anne Bishop, one of the key players in the Trans Ageing and Care Project, said:
“If I as an older trans person had to go into care because I was starting to get alzheimers, would they see my trans status as confusion? Or would I get to a point where I suddenly think: Why is my body like this? I am not supposed to be out.”
My Genderation is an ongoing film project focusing on trans lives and trans experiences. All our content is created by trans people, about trans people, for a much wider audience. Currently run by Fox Fisher and Owl Fisher.
Support us by donating to our patreon or through paypal!
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[@poe9753]

I started socially transitioning at 14 and medically at 18 and it's always great to see older trans people, its interesting also to see how different people's experiences are

[@allyhouser1495]

Just starting my HRT at 47. It's never too late. Another very relavent video. Keep up your great work.

[@KristyMcClellan]

I just came out MTF last year at 56.

[@Ewoorg]

Gongratulations to be free you

[@astralcamisado648]

Congratulations! ^_^

[@jakeb.2057]

My Genderation Gross

[@MarleyDrives]

Thats awesome!

[@amybarnes3052]

Well done congratulations I came out last year at around the same age

[@lillianroux2747]

I’m 63 and I finally got the opportunity to transition. God I needed this and finally I’m on my way m/f 💕💓

[@astralcamisado648]

Congratulations, I'm really happy for you ^_^

[@lillianroux2747]

Astral Camisado thank you 💕💓

[@lillianroux2747]

My Genderation I thank you for the film 💕💓

[@allyhouser1495]

Hey, Lillian. Pleasure to see your comments here. Im not quite as late of a starter on my transition as you ( just starting at 47) but I can relate quite a bit to you and the men and women in this video. Sooo many wasted and unfulfilling years. I don't think I have congratuled you yet on starting your journey, so congratulations, sister. I look forward to your next post on Q.

[@lillianroux2747]

Derek Bowling thank you for your response. I often wondered if anyone really read my comments but I see someone does. I’m almost rid of all my man clothes which helps me deal with a dysphoria I had to live with. I feel amazing with the help of many of my friends. My immediate family is behind me on the transition which is a blessing for me. 💕💓

[@Aeroductile1]

24 y/o transman here! hearing the stories of older trans people is so so important. it's such a shame that there are so many hurdles to get past to even start your treatment. i got referred when i was 18 and only managed to start testosterone 4 months ago. i have nothing but respect for my elders who finally managed to take that step in their 40s/50s/60s. it's such a huge thing to do and the improvement to my quality of life has been noticeable already. much love

[@Sara_PY]

I transitioned at 56. I'm now 68. I've never questioned doing this. Never.

[@thelastunicorn4]

I just want to give all these people a hug. Thank you for sharing your stories.

[@handiable]

Such beautiful transformations. I transitioned at the age of 54 and what's ironic is that I look more beautiful than I ever have hahaha. People think I'm in my late thirties. What's more important than physical looks is the beauty that's inside and the freedom like you have been let out of a cage. I love my trans brothers and sisters. Keep shining your light.

[@Bree12am]

These people are all heroes. I have the utmost respect for older trans people, taking the leap to be who they are later on in life. As a 22yo trans girl, seeing everyone here gives me much more confidence to be me.

[@avz1153]

What?

[@bigcas78]

This is so heartening to behold. I discovered my true self at 34 and worried about it being too late to be seen as anything but the mask I've been wearing for so long. Hello, I'm Cassidy. I'm 35, genderfluid, and no longer afraid of who I am.

[@Robin07014]

This needs so much more attention

[@antoniaroraback5420]

Thank you so much for your film. I live in California which is a blessing because our major hospitals are very well prepared to help us transition. I always felt I was too old and feared I would die with huge regret. When my 71-year-old brother passed away a year ago it was my wake up call. To die with no authenticity or memory of who I really am was not going to happen. While my trans life goes back many years I am now living authenticity. I turn 75 in 5 days. PS: I have found huge support from family and friends as I move forward. My FFS is only 21 days away. YEA!

[@mikedavidz6161]

Wow...that's nice....

[@cmralph...]

I am in the US. Over 65. my first attempt at transitioning FTM in my late 50's was stopped due to health issues I was having on testosterone therapy while working a high-stress job in Silicon Valley. I've managed to stay sane by living a virtual life as a man online for 9 years. But the loneliness I feel being stuck in the wrong body at this final stage of my life and having to accept that no one will ever want me as a partner is sometimes almost unbearable. Thank you for making this video.

[@Jan-go6sr]

I began transitioning at age 65... and had to stop T for a year, and now have re-started.... wanting to find more folks in my age bracket, and to be able to address the issues of making changes at this stage, loss/change of career, healthcare, etc. And now the pandemic and social isolation....

[@ALopez-oy8hl]

There is someone for everyone Some people like myself prefer older individuals. Think outside of the box. Know there is someone for you out there💕

[@pablobratcat]

I'm 50 and married to a cis het male, he keeps saying how much he loves my body, my hips and my boobs, but I have always hated them. I don't want to transition into a male but I am non binary and all the sexual characteristics of being female have always bugged me. How can I talk to my husband about this? I have adhd and aspergers and people think I'm stupid but I never thought of myself as a girl from primary school.

[@coffehbear3359]

same boat. astonished to hear such similarity, even same age

[@robertcrusher1972]

Glad that barriers are talked about here. Is there a link for this artist's work? Her work is gorgeous

[@hannahb4669]

In 2018 30th of June I went to see my doctor and told her I was trans at that time I was 48 I am now 50 M"T"F I have got another 6 months to go to wait for a letter to turn up for me to go to the gender clinic I would have come out as trans many years ago but there was three parts of my life that I couldn't come out .. now I am out who I am and being who I am and truly being who I am I am very happy.... so this is from me to tell you all trans people out there give yourself a big hug and be proud of yourself just like I am wishing you all the best from me hannah

[@reginaphillips5329]

I'm 75 and have been on estrogen therapy for 2plus years and I hear every thing you're saying.

[@babyfacebastard4379]

It's great to see older trans people who have transitioned and are living their lives. On difficult days, it reminds me why I'm doing this: to live happily as my true self.

[@maiaautumne2167]

Im glad they are all happier now, there is no better feeling than being able to be yourself. I wish them all the very best ❤️

[@jwenting]

Starting my social transition at 51. Hoping I'll be accepted by the gender clinic when I get through the waiting lists in 3 years, and not rejected because of my age or medical history. When I grew up it wasn't just illegal to be transgender (yes...) but the very words to express the concept didn't exist in my language so it was impossible to even tell people what you were. Several decades of mental health problems later and just admitting to myself I am what I am, a transwoman, and having built up the guts to expose that to the world did a lot of good already.

[@afiomai69]

Congratulations and Blessings to ALL!!!! AWESOME video! THANK YOU!!!!

[@saraannefay2196]

Wow, that's interesting! I thought I was the only one who worried if I got Altzhiemer's, would I remember that I was trans? Would I get gender dysphoria all over again? I brought it up with my therapist once, but she just laughed it off. It's a real concern for me.

[@saraannefay2196]

@@LucaDavid855 Thanks for the advice. I exercise both my mind and body. I am doing all I can to enjoy the last 1/3 of my existence as myself. The further I get in my transition the less it worries me.

[@emytann7838]

this is a terrible terror film that you have put together in your head.😂😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣 I can only tell you you will always be who you are. the souls have no color or gender, they can feel feminine or masculine. You will never lose your soul so you will never lose yourself. I wish you the best. ps: training is a very good thing

[@solsystem1342]

You'd be no less likely to forget your gender then a cis person would be. So in other words, you'll be fine. Hugs!

[@Zephyr077_]

1st. Get another therapist. 2nd. Get another therapist👊

[@isamarks7773]

Good on them! It's never too late to be yourself and be happy 😊

[@SARA-dd8jm]

At the first images of this video I immediately felt a great affection for all of you, a kiss from Italy.

[@videonicoz]

oh my this video is so moving, crying all my tears. thank you Fox and Owl for this!

[@duvine3882]

Wonderful; thanks for working in creating this kind of cultural anecdotes; amazing work!.

[@bhappy2338]

I'm 65 and hopelessly stuck.. someone please help!

[@katie2858]

Another really lovely and interesting film from, My Genderation. Thank you so much for uploading this. x

[@vc5940]

Thanks for sharing this. I'm a 30 year old who realized I'm a non binary person and this gives me so much hope. Thank you from Uruguay

[@solsystem1342]

From your sib from another crib hugs and best of luck!

[@cledwynstafford4819]

...such heroes, each and every one. Blessings and love from Father Francis.

[@cindypackard9597]

You came out beautiful absolutely beautiful ❤

[@OwlPsalm]

God Loves you no matter what you have done. You are never too old, or too far gone to go to God. Freedom awaits

[@talbottlin]

Thank you for this insightful, helpful, and immensely encouraging interview segment. ❤️

[@elspethfougere9683]

This is so beautiful. What a wonderful project to hear about. Its so positive to think about a future where people are properly cared for in old age, and respectfully treated, including all of who they are as a person 💖 I'm so inspired, thank you 🙏✨

[@ohdarling6657]

His face at 4:10 when se says he is her hero 😭😭 too cute, i hope they are having a happy life toguether

[@davefitzgerald5334]

Love, peace, friends.

[@vitazissel3671]

It's so frustrating that it's not even a question about if your going to pay for transition in the states

[@solsystem1342]

We don't even have universal healthcare, it's crazy

[@tessdecarlo666]

I transitioned 42 years ago as a teenager - why wait!

[@charleskesling4477]

Some of us have no choice

[@iamanillussion]

i didn't cut onions why my eyes in tears

[@cactusbuds2979]

So glad they can feel so happy in their own bodies. I am a trans man and I am so glad I have such great influences like Dave :)

[@kristenconnors2260]

Tell me about it I started HRT at 76 after my wife passed, she was aware from day one. I held off just for her. I wish I had started earlier but such is life.

[@lacville987]

46 year old Trans man and 4 weeks post op today! He’s got a good good woman in his life. I to feel like a new born baby. So happy for him and want to thank his wife for her genuine support 💙💙💙💙

[@davefitzgerald5334]

I don't understand the extremism. SUCH an extreme thing to do with your life. I'm a part time MTF myself called Marisa. God bless you all with best wishes and understanding and compassion.

[@jupiterchild3848]

What you mean you don’t understand the extremism?

[@modmutha8608]

Cat has a lovely smile 😊

[@omnifay469]

I wish I could find out more, being that I am in the age bracket you mentioned. I know nothing about it, but thank you for the video, thank you.

[@azillliasmith2734]

The dogs are so cute....🌸

[@DJTheBlondeSpirit]

❤❤❤❤❤❤

[@mickeykrahulec7014]

I recognize the woman to the left of Fran at 11:31 ! She's in a trans short film that I can't remember the name of! but I still love it!

[@Enemyoflactose]

She was in get off my turf! I watched it right before this video

[@apocalypse12345]

Realize im trans at 29 . Come out as 32 years old 😅

[@meat7361]

4:13 Totally caught him off guard.

[@teleamor]

People over age 20- can you remember even ONE "trans" kid growing up?? Me neither.

[@krimmer66]

it's called being in the closet... Christine Jorgensen (May 30, 1926 - May 3, 1989) was an American trans woman who was the first person to become widely known in the United States for having sex reassignment surgery. She had a career as a successful actress, singer and recording artist.

[@teleamor]

@@krimmer66 It's called BRAINWASHING by the satanic lib media. No one should permanently mutilate their genitals, least of all minors. Notice that when the mind an body are out of sync, the DISEASED lib media always promotes mutilating the body, rather than fixing the mind.

[@seldooddoodles2000]

Because it wasn’t as accepted then, so people either A) were to scared to come out or B) had never heard of being transgender so they didn’t know how to explain their feelings. The reason older people are just now coming out is because it’s finally because acceptable to do so, so they feel safe enough to finally be themselves

[@teleamor]

@@seldooddoodles2000 - Nope. It's PHYSICALLY IMPOSSIBLE to change your gender. People before now knew that. People today have been deceived by the satanic lib media.

[@mk5294]

I am an alcoholic, and therefore denied testosterone and ftm surgeries... LIFE REALLY SUCKS!!!! 😢😢

[@The.Pickle]

I was extremely naive and unprepared for the psychological trauma from witnessing medical "professionals" do things to intentionally cause harm and prevent access to care for transgender people, that GP's do actively allow their personal predjuces to dictate the level of care trans people recieve. These are things that would result in medical negligence charges if done to anyone else. In my naive mind, I never imagined that medical professionals could do such things, and it permanently destroyed my trust in humans. I am 42 and transitioned at 30. the way trans people are treated, I don't expect there will be any "care" as an elder; I've always imagined I will end things to retain my dignity.

[@quasi8180]

This makes me feel better having only just found out at 24

[@Mrgothvampireglenn]

It don't better how old we R any age have a sex changed if they what too

[@day-jay1630]

I think they tried to say : it doesn’t matter how old we are, a person of any age can change their sex if they want to

[@beastinfection638]

@@day-jay1630 Thank you for translating that to English

[@janoss-zk5fk]

Yeah I would have to disagree that it’s never too late. I’m 50 and it’s way too late for me mentally and physically.

[@ReikkiKyraJonsun]

It's worldwide..am and have experienced this first hand...if you pay..could be OK.. maybe...even within transcommunity...age discrimination exists...even worse as in my case..if you are intersex & find yourself transitioning- as a result- of prescribed medications post covid vaccination. Do not think myself unique..in this situation..there has to be others.

[@catherinekershaw903]

Poor Dave first bloke couldnt get a word in edgeways!!!!

[@briancampbell6156]

I came out at 53 started hormones at 55 and quit when I was 62 because I had nothing to show for it, it's definitely too late to come out when you're in the mid fifties

[@justynjonn]

I'm not so sure if dressing them up and supporting delusion is the way to go. They're not fooling anyone you know. Treat them dignity as a human and I'm sure many will. However looking this way, a child will always tell and many others can see it , no matter how many hormones or surgeries you do. I have a friend who is like this and the surgeries just keep coming and she's never satisfied.

[@The.Pickle]

I'm afraid you are still failing to grasp the point. Being transgender is not about trying to deceive or satisfy others, nor is it about conforming to external standards of what a woman should look like. Rather, it is a deeply personal quest for authenticity. Every individual possesses an innate sense of self, a unique internal blueprint. For transgender individuals, honoring this blueprint is a biological and psychological imperative. In essence, it is an unwavering commitment to living a truthful existence, regardless of others' opinions or expectations. In light of this, I hope you treat your transgender friend with the respect and understanding they deserve. By doing so, you will demonstrate the true qualities of a loyal and supportive person and friend.

[@mk5294]

​@@The.PickleVery well said!!

[@97warlock]

just be yourself. i gotta get tf off here now

[@helenalovelock1030]

Hope that GP got the sack

[@catherinekershaw903]

Poor Dave. His wife is nice, but she cant half talk.

[@dianecockerell1156]

I love being a women women woman women I no what I am don't need to be told gender I am women had baby's and I am women

[@ephebofreedomfighter2430]

u ppl think ur so open minede... u full of ship

[@avz1153]

Huh?

[@audig393]

Nobody cares

[@JoeParrish-un4gn]

You are stupid idiot you cared enough to make that kind you don’t care why comment like you really should listen to

[@davefitzgerald5334]

Well it just seems very extreme to cut up your genitalia and have gender reassignment surgery. I don't think I will ever go that far myself. But I am on estrogen hormones for the last four months now . Not sure about surgeries. Maybe an orchiectomy. I might like that. Love and peace from Marisa Fitzgerald from Ireland.

[@marcielynn4886]

If you wait till you are 60 that is at least 40 years of suffering.

[@perry3556]

who cares? a documentary about a lumberjacks working routines would be more groundbreaking nowadays....