Live 6: Emergency Game [20.12.21] - No More Jockeys with Alex Horne, Tim Key + Mark Watson

This is an edited version of a game originally streamed live. No More Jockeys is a game created by Alex Horne, Tim Key and Mark Watson.
If you liked the video: give us a 👍
If you loved the video: subscribe ❤️
✔ HOW TO PLAY
On each turn, players name a person plus a relevant category - that person and category are then forbidden. If you're caught naming someone who falls under any previous category, you're out of the game.
★ MERCHANDISE
nomorejockeys.com
★ PLAYERS
• Alex Horne: Bring Me the Head of the Taskmaster: www.amazon.co....
• Tim Key: Here We Go Round the Mulberry Bush: utterandpress....
• Mark Watson: 8 Deaths (And Life After Them): www.audible.co...
♫ MUSIC
Suite bergamasque (L. 75) (Debussy)
► VIDEO
Alex Horne + Haiminh Le
♥ THANKS
Josh Barker, Morgan Davies + Lianne Coop
#AlexHorne #TimKey #MarkWatson

[@NoMoreJockeys]

1. Yes, it's a Christmas game released in January WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO ABOUT IT 2. If you want to find out about the next streamed game - if/ whenever that is - follow our athletes on Twitter.

[@Anonymouse85]

This nuisance penguin is just happy for a new upload! And i shall follow these top notch athletes, thanks.

[@megalamb]

Was it intentional to bleep one ‘cunt’ and not the second one…?

[@haiminh_]

@@megalamb Ah. Oddly, none of us spotted that - sorry 👀

[@bearhustler]

@@Anonymouse85 SQAUAAAWWK

[@d3modawid]

I don't mind it.

[@andracatheduckking257]

One of my favorite running jokes in NMJ is the incredibly inconsistent censorship of swear words

[@BodywiseMustard]

favourite

[@kcolloran]

Key has such a blindspot around birds. He doesn't think they're animals and now he thinks what's clearly a turkey is a chicken.

[@TattyBojangles81]

Is Desert Orchid a bird? Who's to say

[@gladtobeangry]

@@TattyBojangles81 You're thinking of Desert Ostrich.

[@anthonyi7284]

What do you get at Christmas? What do you get at Christmas time? You get emergency games, you get silly names, you get a man called Mert and a pineapple shirt, you get a whistle blown, you get a cracker microphone, you get Watson's nipples and prime beef tipples. What do you get at Christmas? What do you get at Christmas time?

[@peacefulpaul]

This is lovely work

[@royal7800]

Hoi hoi

[@andracatheduckking257]

I don't mind this one damn bit

[@shanecommins7968]

While my compliments to OP for doing the work, I am *extremely* disappointed that the replies didn't carry on the song.

[@hattenkofer]

Wouldn't it be great if we were talented.

[@oshada]

I think the thing I most enjoy about NMJ is the flawless captioning. Much bigger channels just don’t give a shit and seeing the effort here is such a tonic

[@Azeria]

Toto Wolff is a Robin Reliant name when you think about it.

[@royal7800]

Big ‘when’

[@Azeria]

@@royal7800 HUGE when

[@nathanwarren5616]

Mark's rendition of Jessie's song was hauntingly beautiful.

[@rowanaboat4523]

I’d like to raise a tall glass of prime beef to the continuation of no more jockeys

[@4r7hr_87]

Big if admittedly, but if Desert Orchid walked into a pub I'm not sure they'd recognise the big lad.

[@gladtobeangry]

Absolutely gigantic if.

[@DynamiteBobby]

"I'm like Harry Kane, you can't really send me off because I'm one of the founding fathers"!

[@Peteroranje]

Those Kitchen Conversions titles though, they've blown the budget on this one.

[@justinelouise2655]

I don't mind Desert Awkward and I absolutely don't mind Key's defense that the horse goes on "individual business trips".

[@peacefulpaul]

Watched this again today and in a crowded field I do think individual business trips is my single favourite NMJ line

[@jessesutton7985]

I've watched this God knows how many times, yet just now watching it with subtitles on alerted me to a fun extra tidbit during the Toto Wolff diversion. Seriously, this whole series is such a gift.

[@MrChefzor]

Can I just mention, I appreciate the game, but I also appreciate vastly the effort put into releasing with subtitles!

[@marskristin]

Always! So great!!

[@nonindividual]

I hope this isn't the end of No More Jockeys. Every Friday I come to the channel and press the refresh button, hoping for a reward. No rewards yet, but I still keep hoping.

[@Kiwi-cc7ib]

Bit late but they've confirmed that Set 5 is in production, just gotta wait

[@CortezHoratio]

@@Kiwi-cc7ib I came to the latest video just to see if there was any news. So relieved! Thanks!

[@royal7800]

Well you just have to keep your friend and mine, hope.

[@hannahl8]

@@Kiwi-cc7ib thanks for the great news!!

[@bearhustler]

@@Kiwi-cc7ib Thanks, knowing it will return makes life have meaning

[@ceiphillips7486]

I would pay money to watch this live.... Oh yeah I did.

[@Naebody99]

Key out here looking like the world's most surprising egg.

[@BodywiseMustard]

Potential egg

[@Naebody99]

@@BodywiseMustard nae wrong 🐥

[@davevad9]

It's amazing the things NMJ leads you to investigate and discover: "A young Dalí had exhibited signs of mental illness. These had included uncontrollable fits of hysterical laughter and attention-seeking behavior, such as painting his armpits blue and rubbing his body with goat dung and fish glue"

[@JamieCurrant]

I've heard that uncensored swear, and I've enjoyed it

[@kelpkelp5252]

"I didn't take my gas off the pedal"

[@daupomatic]

I thought his call-back there was a sign of professionalism.

[@bpmcdmt]

Never expected the country I live to feature so prominently! I, too, love Taiwan, great country.

[@somsoc_]

Loved the reading of 'What's Night (These Days)?' 5:38 One of the classics!

[@marskristin]

Happy Christmouse in January to all who celebrate! And might I add, one of the best, if not the best, looks of any game. Just glorious, truly!!

[@tomtys4913]

The atmosphere on this one felt Prime NMJ to me. Well played, chaps! Cheers from the Belgian fanbase!

[@phelimkennedy6653]

As much as the business trips defence may work for the going to different races, I'm surprised there wasn't more of a push on the fact they race on a literal circuit

[@mariae9429]

Good one that! It could have meant No More Electricians too perhaps?

[@bearhustler]

Mark lifting his nightdress... I thought we said no more beefcakes ?

[@gladtobeangry]

I don't know about beef. I think the best description he could have reasonably hoped for was pork scratchings.

[@TheDrugOfTheNation]

Distilled beef.

[@jamieedison6569]

Only the classics, (tur)Key to start!

[@danataylor5225]

Desert Awkward just broke me all over again.

[@gavinbuck8130]

Same here, simple but effective, they just dropped it in and walked away. :)

[@yawnberg]

Miss you boys

[@hdoddema]

It's alright. Us below the line are fine with getting Christmas scraps in January.

[@samuelcardwell577]

Have to say Key was lucky to get Lisowski through this time - not only do snooker players have to rub their cues on those little chalk things, but I'm pretty sure they do a good proportion of their work at night??

[@TheOrlandoTrustfull]

Key walking after 2 (two) correct challenges. How benevolent.

[@leileleileleile]

haha, indeed.

[@andrewtuft8386]

Horses in No More Jockeys can't meet people, but can go on business trips.

[@pidgsaints]

Good to know Taiwan is a country, from the man himself.

[@samuelcardwell577]

Oh nooo, NMJ's going to get taken down by your friend and mine the People's Republic of China

[@daupomatic]

@@samuelcardwell577 When you think about it, Winnie the Pooh won't like that.

[@thisaccountisdead168]

Key *just* scraping through after not being able to name another to his first category. Love to see it - again.

[@bearhustler]

When I think about it, I really miss these guys.

[@horsejohnson7959]

This is still good January 2023

[@noe9250]

please bring back NMJ soon, we miss you dearly

[@daconor91]

Watto confirmed on Twitter 3 days ago that there is a set 5, trailer to be released soon 🤘

[@Fortunalux]

Key's second generation headgear makes him look simultaneously, when you think about it, like a chess queen (physical piece) and a chess king (graphical representation).

[@lowfuel6089]

Can one of my fellow dogs of war make a list of all the BTL nicknames? Thanks you kindly, nuisance penguins.

[@BudBonkerson]

happy no more jockeys friday

[@oscarcannon9206]

Brooklyn Beckham has, when you think about it, published a photography book, which features a great many photographic self portraits. An interesting opportunity for a challenge, or at the very least a discussion, missed. Over.

[@Zakuznapper]

Key looks like a village fool in an Asterix comic. Also: Watto confirmed CPC lackey? His disdain for Taiwan and the red communal dress gives it away.

[@paulbremen]

Have to say, this is some prime NMJing. Great stuff. Though Watto missed a very interesting challenge on Hannibal Lecter - surely born before Hawking…? (Cue debate on whether a characters creation constitutes birth, we haven‘t had one of those for too long!)

[@albl247]

4:47 forgot to censor-ding the bad swear

[@Five-lines-of-something]

Whoever was on censorship duty here needs to be either sacked or congratulated.

[@martymcflew]

lol the closed captions at 4:47 says "DING" without it being censored on video

[@jamesismyname3690]

Is it wrong for me to wish for another lockdown so that we get another season soon?

[@TheClairem75]

I’m sure Brooklyn Beckham has taken a selfie or twenty, a self portrait.

[@BudBonkerson]

There's a whole Christmas album buried in this video

[@parlonfilmco]

Jessie in Toy Story 2 doesn't have pig tails. She has a pony tail (one central braid or bunch, rather than one on each side).

[@chriszeigler1736]

I'm not from Taiwan but I am living in and watching from there so that has to count somewhat, right?

[@karensouthworth2946]

often I sing “don’t look at your bookshelves, don’t look at your books” it’s so catchy

[@chriskaprys]

Horne looking very professional. As in somehow plausibly pulling off Natalie Portman and Jean Reno simultaneously.

[@Sam-wv4fz]

Of course Tim thinks night starts at midnight.

[@BodywiseMustard]

So do I. Night, morning, afternoon, evening in 6 hour segments

[@occono3543]

​@@BodywiseMustard It's confusing because 6 to 12 is evening but midnight is....mid-night. So Evening is nighttime but after midnight is....also just nighttime?

[@djadsbeats]

Tim Key was the only good thing about the new series of ‘After Life’

[@RichardCorderoPhilosophy]

I haven't finished watching it yet, but I'm *absolutely furious* Horne called Key's hat, which is *obviously* a turkey, a "chicken". Sort yourself out, Horne. It's disgraceful.

[@una_10bananas]

To be fair key wouldn't know the difference since he doesn't think a Robin's an animal and he thinks bats are birds

[@drw23]

As soon as he said Desert Orchid I thought, "There's no chance you recognise that guy in the pub!" Which raises the question, has a name ever fallen foul of more categories than Desert Orchid here?

[@vinceven]

It is called "The Silence of the Lambs" because lambs, when they are led to slaughter, go quietly and without making a sound.

[@daupomatic]

It's quite clearly explained in the fillum.

[@philh5292]

Tim: Who do I look like? Me: Baldrick, from Blackadder II. Tim: (continued) But think of nice things I look like. Me: Ah. I'll keep thinking.

[@urgaguer]

I'm Taiwanese, I'm loving it.

[@Rosalind-butNotThatOne]

I don't mind Horne practicing his hair swishes at 25:35.

[@peterking3196]

I definitely don't mind the links appearing throughout the game to pivotal NMJ moments of old. In case of newcomers wondering who the fuck (whistle, yellow card) Mert Aksac is and when he was first mentioned.

[@nuisancepenguin5210]

Is he a footballer? Is he an actor? Is he a second assistant director? It must be said, we know pretty much fuck (whistle again, yellow card) all about the guy.

[@jodievdw]

I'm struggling to mind Ievan Polka as the official background of Kitchen Conversions.

[@sebzilla89]

Horne in the wig and glasses looks like Disco Elysium's Jean Vicquemare in his "disguise"

[@Aliasalpha]

He really does, not quite the right colour wig but just as convincing as Jean's

[@Rateus_Johanson]

That chicken is clearly a turkey. No more people who rub things take out a surprisingly large number of people when you stop and think about it.

[@the_TEMPEST]

ATTN ATLs : pls drop Set 5. refresh your pass cards. retrieve your reprieves. pitstop your penelopes. Lets Go!

[@KCtaskwatch]

I like that **** was bleeped in the subtitles and not in the actual game 🤣🤣

[@BodywiseMustard]

I guessed 375°F and 700g so I'm happy with that

[@Eggfreg]

I have to say, Key doesn't look a million miles away from Roman centurion

[@peacefulpaul]

I miss you all a lot btl and atl

[@stephennass3840]

Going for someone famous for his drawings and sketches (Charles Darwin) right after "No More Self Portraits". A bold move by Horne.

[@RTPxPJ]

When I really do think about it; I would say that Kate Bush primarily does her job at night (after dark), does she not?

[@Gnuary]

Desert Orchward: what a beefcake

[@elcapitan8400]

Key looking like Chechen Warlord President Ramzan Kadyrov... with a Christmas pudding on his head...

[@cl0udbear]

Anyone know where you can Watto’s Christmas nightie from?

[@post1305]

Watsons got the mega hots for Whitmore.

[@leemartindale3149]

its quite clearly a turkey on Key's bonce.

[@franksimon8375]

The pilgrim hat on the turkey is the clue

[@simonlake_]

What's your favourite 'car name'? Mine is Bobby Goldsboro.

[@laurapolly5419]

Joyous ⭐️❤️

[@csurname]

George Alexander Louis Mountbatten-Windsor

[@gladtobeangry]

The last japanese WW2 soldier who surrendered in 1972, Lt. Hiroo Onoda.

[@nadiagreen9840]

Well at least the subtitles say DING even if Key doesn't 4:46

[@BC-yl3qb]

when the world needed them most, the vanished

[@Jambobist]

It's silly season in No More Jockeys, just a bit of fun really, low stakes.

[@bondfool]

Yeah, this one had a really warm, goofy energy to it.

[@the1whereIwatch]

alex, I’m having TM withdrawals already. pls indulge us here.

[@MLB9000]

Only just realised that they can’t see me

[@00tommo]

So Toto Wolff isn't 4 zero's? What a twist!

[@MatONeill]

Best show since Dizzy Heights.

[@pbartmess]

Does Tim Key perhaps look like Richard Dreyfus in "Jaws"?

[@AlCasu1888]

No more no more no more jockeys. Please

[@WickedWickedJaymezIsMassive]

No more people who rub things...a prime, and unfortunately missed opportunity for us to hear about your friend and mine, Rory Delap

[@Lukey_B]

Good item. Fast delivery AAaaa+

[@no_one_of_that_name_here]

I ❤TAIWAN

[@mariae9429]

I mean, Key not walking on Desert Awkward working on a circuit... I understand that the players with a sense of decency are tired of arguing with the man, but come on!

[@BethanyLowe8773]

This, all of this. Key out Key out Key out...

[@gladtobeangry]

Key, to answer your question, you look a little bit like a combination of a really festive capitol-rioter and Henry the VIII.

[@squeezyjohn1]

Did I just see Key walk? What's going on?

[@jamesismyname3690]

I can understand if the three amigos don't want to do this every week, but there's a lot of fans who love the format and would also enjoy seeing other comedians step in during the off-weeks (and I'm sure they would enjoy it too). Acaster, Gamble and Nish, for example, and I'm sure there'd be many other great combos.

[@epsleon]

Could have ended with the oldest question known to man; "What came first? The Stephen Hawking or The Stephen Hawking?" Was Stephen Hawking born before Stephen Hawking was born? I reckon it could go either way.

[@chrism6952]

what was the emergency?

[@nathanwarren5616]

The score now stands at Desmond squared.

[@Rick-zv3xs]

You guys are great! Also, you suck for not having done more videos. 🤨

[@ellengillon]

Horne has a Kurt Cobain vibe going on

[@marskristin]

Agreed!