Set 5, Game 6 [03.03.22] - No More Jockeys with Alex Horne, Tim Key + Mark Watson

[@NoMoreJockeys]

🧦

[@0011ftw]

no more sockeys

[@josssbo]

Alex can I have your hoodie please? Edit: I need it to get the colours right on my webcam

[@enbyennui]

the tone in key's voice when he said "oh al, that's crap" was fucking devastating haha

[@jomeyer9892]

genuine disappointment in his voice

[@goawayimsleeping509]

A compilation of legendary moments in this episode, for future reference: 0:00 BAKED BEANS 1:47 Oven gloves - so I don't burn my tiny little handies awf. 2:55 Can we put our "vats for cats" scandal behind us? 3:02 Hello... good morning... SHUT UP!!! 3:11 Fig roll... fig roll... I'm rather droll. 3:35 Debbie Mcgee... No more Debbies ;P 6:53 WHAT'S YOUR CATEGORY!? 7:36 Mert Aksac 7:57 Cigs. Six what? 8:35 (QUACK) Ingenious categories. 8:57 NO MORE CITIES! 9:17 What is he peeling? What is he feeling? Key gets lucky 10:10 There's no need to knock if you're a milkman! 13:02 Cher - Nature's Enya. 13:37 Oh, Al, that's crap. 15:31 Neymar Jockeys/Neymar Nother 16:17 Key does his face 17:35 Buckinghamshire broadband 18:38 Horne ends with a quick gag 20:05 Key's sitcom 21:09 Key's Trousers category 22:16 Watto challenges Key; Horne lists fame-os. What a bloody good game lads.

[@valerieholt4057]

A Welsh friend said that her husband recently briefly owned the Perrier of "a famous comedian" after he forgot it in Wales after a gig, and I was like It was Tim Key wasn't it. It was.

[@AKAMustang]

🎵 There's no need to knock if you're a milkman 🎵

[@peacefulpaul]

I'm not gonna rank the top 50 No More Jockeys episodes but this one made me laugh until tears arrived in my eyes so I imagine it would be in there.

[@nathan87]

I think you would probably have to list 50 funnier No More Jockeys episodes.

[@darrenharman3362]

It's definitely in the top 50 very high echelon of funniest episodes ever.

[@jim.the.editor]

Name another

[@peacefulpaul]

​@@jim.the.editor the one with the morph dance

[@Rosalind-butNotThatOne]

I love how, when Horne says "Why is he doing that face, and why are you doing that face?" (16:37), you can tell who's "he" and who's "you."

[@paulrichards8496]

This game scores *REALLY* high on the Game Resolution Satisfaction Quotient (GRSQ). Jackson. City. Undoubted. Playful resistance from Horne, but a nice, clean walk in the end. As for JL, to find a definitive list and have both active players agree to abide by it was a thing of beauty. Cut-and-dried. You could use this one in NMJ textbooks, when teaching new players about the variance of GRSQ. Suppose you'd have to use Buzz Aldrin and Hulk Hogan as counterpoints.

[@jomeyer9892]

Loved the JL challenge. Perfect

[@darrenharman3362]

There's two cities named Clarkson.

[@TattyBojangles81]

"Baked beans in a frying pan" and "There's no need to knock if you're a milkman" enter the pantheon of great No More Jockey's tunes

[@larrythechicken]

if socks were telescopes, you'd only be able to see a foot

[@ZaphodTHEBeeblebrox]

dont mind that

[@pooroldnostradamus]

It’s been 3 months, so I suppose I’ll have to chime in and introduce your friend and mine, Big “if”

[@AaronsGames]

This show is, when I stop to think about it, genuinely one of my favourite things.

[@seancurtis9785]

Several tuneful songs, a swift knock on the door by the local milkman and a quick gag to tie it all off. Dare I say, this might be the best episode of NMJ that we’ve had yet chaps? Big might ☝️

[@bearhustler]

Branson, milkmen, who isn't knocking on Horne's door ?

[@seancurtis9785]

@@bearhustler Tbf, Christmas just wouldn’t be Christmas without an impromptu visit from the titan of industry himself

[@bearhustler]

Nature's titan.

[@samuelcardwell577]

a) I think I speak for all of us Winchester Williams down here when I say I'm disappointed we didn't get to see the last category enter play b) Excellent work on the post-credits bit

[@ZaphodTHEBeeblebrox]

"I wish I wasn't sepia." - Alex Horne

[@chriskaprys]

Honestly, the captions are second to none. Flawlessly executed. Simple as that.

[@benallain]

Seeing Watto lose his mind after the trousers category was worth the price of admission on its own, I don't mind it

[@sackclothandashes998]

Absolutely ecstatic to see that a cat vat was used and now there's a green cat

[@jomeyer9892]

i love it when Tim and Mark seem to have decided it’s a musical episode, apropos of nothing and presumably without consulting Alex

[@RCTitan33]

Ode to the Milk Man is easily a top 50 song, maybe even top 1

[@deadexcel9583]

when you think about it, this is one of the best episodes of jockeys in a while and i dont mind saying that actually

[@carrots1550]

I think Mark Watson has the most contagious laugh of anyone I've seen laughing. Lovely stuff.

[@alexbullard2479]

Absolutely cracking game of Jockeys played in high spirits. Surprised given the number of songs that we didn't get a rendition of "Don't Look at Your Bookshelves"

[@gabriellag2611]

Or "Does A Spider Have a Heart"!

[@anthonyi7284]

I don't mind making it "Neymar nother" in the future

[@HarrisonsFord]

Auf Wiedersehen Pipette is going to be very popular down here, I'm sure of it.

[@royal7800]

The nuisance penguins can’t have enough

[@Anonymouse85]

You know its a great one when you've got Alex clasping his hands in front of his eyes and you got Mark doubling over, face turning red with laughter. Loved it 😄

[@soph5678]

Key, I’ve got a Penelope Pitstop costume. Found it in a charty shop on a drunken date and thought of you. Now it sits in my wardrobe gathering dust. Great Jockeys today lads. Lots of love!

[@BodywiseMustard]

Is that charty or charté?

[@thebigspliffdaddy5470]

Somes ones bragging, going on date! you out the rest of us to shame

[@skyinsession]

these middle aged men have the same manic energy as a horde of preschoolers

[@rkah6187]

Which we definitely do not mind.

[@dhsjakhdsajk]

tims face when alex was saying enya had me in tears

[@sandhannahtiser]

after returning to them all many times, is it controversial to say this may be the best pound-for-pound jockeys episode? doesn't have the overarching narratives of hogangate or the bath, but the sheer number of moments i still quote to this day is astounding to behold

[@emmafrost1210]

Best jockeys episode.... Yet?

[@michaelphoneclerx8662]

Amazing to think Horne's the one who sings for a living

[@BodywiseMustard]

He sings, but I wouldn't say it's for a living. He'd be fine without singing.

[@michaelphoneclerx8662]

@BodywiseMustard Fair

[@jamesbradbury1415]

I'm below the line, and I'm loving it.

[@Dan4D]

When you think about it

[@paulrichards8496]

Just realised Alex Horne shares his initials with the second-most-famous person of all-time.

[@itsokay7989]

Quite extraordinary when you stop to think about it.

[@prinpi]

No Need to Knock if You're a Milkman just replaced Does a Spider have a Heart as my favourite NMJ song

[@isaaaaca]

honestly, the respect I felt for Horne when he said he wasn't walking. caught square down the barrel of the challenge, no where to hide, just refusing to be cowed, I would like to see this horne more often

[@daupomatic]

*But only* because he then walked. It was a solid success challenge.

[@JuliesCookingShow]

never forget the Hulk Hogan incident...never forget

[@mrSam3ooo]

The way Tim said "Oh Al that's crap" 🤣

[@TheOrlandoTrustfull]

I'll be singing There's No Need To Knock If You're A Milkman all weekend. Absolute banger.

[@jomcg8867]

Key doing the work on 1% battery there. It’s that level of ballsiness that makes you a winner at this game. Sometimes.

[@GazB54]

THE funniest episode I’ve seen, Key is on fire here, cracked me up 😂

[@trishking6343]

Brilliant work gents, love it.

[@KCtaskwatch]

Horne shouting WHATS YOUR CATEGORY 🤣🤣🤣

[@KCtaskwatch]

No more jeans comes from that... harssssshhhh category!

[@bearhustler]

I now can't stop thinking Key has a panto planned 'Jack Lisowski and the 40 Trousers". He could use his pipette joke in it.

[@unexpectedpenny]

Possibly my favourite episode yet! Had to pause so many times as we were crying with laughter 😅

[@ottowoodfall1824]

when you think about it, Key's trouser category is one of the stone cold all timers

[@PeterCrighton]

Class selection of background music this week! Also, I tried to wipe my spit from that spot on Key’s mirror.

[@PaddyRoon7]

Key's commitment to make the rule as confusing as possible makes for a fascinating watch. "No more Debbies." "What about Deborah Meaden?" "Yeah you can have Deborahs."

[@volternoomi]

Isn't this the least confusing rule he's made? (yet)

[@PaddyRoon7]

@@volternoomi lol true, its just a good example since he clearly goes out of his way to make it confusing haha

[@riley6646]

I've never cried laughing at NMJ as hard as I just did at Key's face

[@PaddyRoon7]

8:34 Key really put some mustard on that second go, cracks me up

[@olivergoodacre]

The Lisowski category really made me laugh

[@leona6455]

Watto losing his shit when that category came up was pure joy. I laughed my tiny ass off.

[@lordofthe6string]

I was doing something earlier that required me to turn my, speakers up loud, and totally forgot. So the first video I watch has blasted "BAKED BEANS, IN A FRYING PAN" to all the neighbours 😂

[@brilliantmonarch]

Looking forward to that Auf Wiedersehen Pipette shirt

[@bdrummond7102]

Another glorious battle of the minds. Such twisted, twisted minds.

[@DynamiteBobby]

In future, don't put game dates in the title of the video, just let us guess by the state/length of Key's beard

[@catbuechler6283]

so glad it only took five sets to finally get to NMJ’s musical episode.

[@PaddyRoon7]

One of the most interesting games in a long while. Top 50 famo's is a fantastic category

[@garethwesleyevans]

Haha! Loved the Jack Lisowski category was brilliant!!

[@WadeyUK]

This episode was definitely in the top 50 episodes of NMJ so far, I'm mostly happy with it.

[@Williamwerenberg]

“Your hands are covered in hit sitcom” sounds really really dirty to me

[@CK-ceekay]

They've gone absolutely mad this set, it's just constant singing. NMJ the Musical

[@Fiona-mp9dw]

At “more than 40 times” my drink came out my nose

[@jonathanpitchfork2917]

What an opening 59 seconds

[@robertking6267]

love a bit of ivor cutler!

[@una_10bananas]

Yes! Wasn't really expecting that!

[@bearhustler]

This game with its socks and songs and aging English men and general weirdness was like some unholy offspring of Glee and Last of the Summer Wine. Don't mind it.

[@Jambobist]

Aging? They're the same age as me!... Oh God.

[@leona6455]

Me too! Yikes...I kinda do mind that actually.

[@PaddyRoon7]

Key just randomly talking about how many children Neymar has while revealing Zidane's age is peak NMJ

[@mytube001]

That was a very good game!

[@ohmy255]

To tell you the truth, I did spend the first 4 minutes of this video thinking there would be one category played, and key would win by annoying his competitors. Excellent game lads

[@dylanm6287]

Sounded like it was going to be a sung-through episode for a fair while there

[@peterking3196]

I don't mind the reflected light in Key's mirror, but the worrying looking leak patch from previous sets always gave me real anxiety that his ceiling was about to fall through.

[@csurname]

10:28 Watson and Horne stealing Key's best joke

[@simonw560]

You are silly boys this episode. We love to experience it with, when you think about, our eyes.

[@joewells1111]

I love how jeremy Clarkson just popped through. He really needs to wear more jeans i think. 😂

[@TannerLikesStuff]

baked beans really were a musical fruit it turns out

[@emmafrost1210]

Missed opportunity to have a challenge on Clarkson City in Kentucky...

[@neach-brathaidh-fala]

Was watching an old episode of HIGNFY and Matt Hancock came up. This went up 2 mins ago: divine providence.

[@silsonsteve]

A classic game.

[@csurname]

It's been a big episode for people's own petards.

[@thompsonnoel]

As far as I don't know, when I think about it, no one's done the public service thing by cataloging this game's categories so it falls to me. If you don't know (big if), spoilers ahead: "Key to start" Debbie McGee - No more Debbies (mainly known as Debbie. Further example: Debbie Reynolds) Barry Cryer-No more "Much Loved" in their obituary Peter Andrew-No more Surname + letter = forename Noah-No more never worn jeans Anna Crilly-No more aged 39-48 Denzel Washington-No more cities Jeremy Clarkson-No more initials same as high echelon celebrity (Top 50 celebrities of all time) Zinedine Zidane-No more subject of biopic >Horne challenge on age: Failed (Peter Jackson-No more current beards) >Watto challenge on city: Horne out (Jack Lisowski-No more wearing the same trousers more than 40 times) >Watto challenge on high echelon initials (John Lennon): Key Out Mark Watson wins!

[@thomasthomasson2319]

Loved the Ivor Cutler reference from Horne x

[@laurapolly5419]

Thanks boys. Golden chaos. Can I take my sock off now?⭐️❤️

[@samc2]

Excellent game lads, some great Cats there 👍 (green included obv)

[@J.L.Media.]

Greatest category ever. A shame we never got to see it in action. Hopefully in game 7 Key starts with Michaela Tabb and uses it again.

[@garethjenkins2729]

Green Cat 💚💚💚

[@BillyJean1975]

I had Alex’s hooded top in the 1990….93 perhaps. I wore it under denim dungarees. It was a look for sure x

[@rob_beaumont]

I also tried to clean the thing of Key's mirror from my own screen.

[@AClarkeism]

At least they make each other laugh

[@GazB54]

Key’s face 😂

[@karensouthworth2946]

Absolutely hilarious 😂

[@shannondade1145]

Really satisfying green cat

[@BodywiseMustard]

Hey, Horne. I have that same hoodie

[@aramintypotter]

Excruciating to be Horne's milkman today. Imagine the shame!

[@C.I...]

13:06 I think Tim thought Mark was going to say "Nature's N-word" (N.B. not the actual word, but as I have written), given their previous discussion about saying something racist, but couldn't share with the class.

[@andrewtuft8386]

There's no need to knock if you're a milk man🎵

[@t.c.4321]

Tim Key ? I'm *Team* Key.

[@DasIstDerMars]

NMJ the musical - coming to a theatre near you

[@m_w_a_t]

Highlight of the set so far for me!

[@davewebb2313]

'I don't eat pips'. What was that about?

[@mobyrichard6298]

Oh Watto, when I hear your scintillating rhymes my sock moves to quite a serious place

[@AshArAis]

Holst in F! Love it!

[@emmafrost1210]

Don't mind it

[@awalton]

Baked beans in a Frying Pan, the musical.

[@katiehough2499]

Almost missed the post credits!

[@praalgraf]

[GLEEFUL CHUCKLING]