notes on coming back to YOUR life.

[@ChoclateGeek]

“the ones who get offended by your boundaries are the ones who benefited from you not having any” 💯

[@the.ashfiles]

I’m not the first to say something of this iteration but I remind myself of it every single time I’m in a situation that warrants this pep talk ✨ it’s been immensely helpful!

[@RealBradMiller]

Oh, shiz...

[@skumsters2323]

its a great cliche thats worth remembering ;)

[@cerico76]

So true.

[@HopefullRomantic]

"Comparing someone else's highlight reel to your behind the scenes" - is such a beautiful and concise way of putting it! Thank you!!

[@thomasconnors4338]

I once saw a very famous very attractive actress at an event in LA while I was working security. If all the women who have ever felt insecure for not looking like her could only see her under natural light… I don’t want to body shame (or skeleton shame in her case) but if I met that star’s plastic surgeon I might question his skill at his job, let’s just put it that way.

[@DaisyNueve43456]

"It's the decision to stop pretending that things are fine when they're really not."

[@the.ashfiles]

How often do we answer 'I'm fine' or 'it's fine' to people when it's really not. It's something I noticed I was doing almost daily... but I'm lying to not only them but also myself. ✨

[@incognito595]

​@@the.ashfilesThat is the moment you begin to make your life better. Know your Worth, love yourself, and have Compassion for yourself. That works wonders, it really does. Start NOW.

[@icecreamassassin3006]

"You can't wait for all your problems to be solved before you decide to be happy."

[@ECThurn]

it's honestly concerning how youtube's algorithm manages to recommend me videos that are so relevant to me in a particular moment thanks for the likes guys, makes me feel all relatable and cool 👍

[@the.ashfiles]

I’m glad it found you! But I get it… especially when a subject matter is something I thought about, not spoke about… like how did you get into my mind?!

[@ECThurn]

@@the.ashfiles it's the fact that i've recently been entering the "quiet rebellion" phase for probably the first time in my life, so the fact that your video came up in my feed where you essentially articulate the entire process makes it seem like youtube knows more than it should haha thank you for making this though, it's a message that many people (including myself) need to hear. life is about living, not playing a character

[@the.ashfiles]

@ 100%! You get it! Wishing you the best on your journey! You’ve got this! 🙌🏻✨

[@screamingmimi90]

I'm with you EC. Same thing happened to me. I’ve been slowly realizing how much I’ve been living like I’ve been told to live and not how I want. Then I see this. Yes, the algorithm sent it, but we called to it first with our questions, searching, and learning we did to recognize it when it arrived. We did so many things before we even saw this video. It's all us. Ash sends it out and we bring it into ourselves. Best wishes on your new journey. 🩷

[@ECThurn]

@@screamingmimi90 i think i got here because i started watching a bunch of videos about getting a paper notebook instead of scrolling on your phone lol for me it started with very simple things where i would realize i was acting in a way that didn't actually make sense to me. like laughing when everyone else laughs even if i didn't find anything particularly funny. or trying to sound more enthusiastic about something than i actually am. i started experimenting with just not doing these small things where i didn't feel like doing them, and realized the whole world doesn't end just because i don't act a certain way that i think i "should". they're small changes but they're very liberating

[@festosanjo1442]

"There's no secret permission slip for the life you actually want." Nailed it🎯

[@the.ashfiles]

Thanks! ☺️✨

[@Ummuri2000]

During the summer, I scheduled "feral trips" where I'd take a bus out to the mountains for a day. I'd hike, soak in a hot spring, have some tea, read, journal, and generally try to ignore everyone around me. It kept me so grounded, and I grew a lot during each adventure. The buses don't run over the winter, so I'm struggling to find a replacement

[@the.ashfiles]

I really hope you can find a replacement because this sounds like pure magic! I feel we often grow more into our true selves when we can tune out the world and just be with ourselves. ✨

[@somuchbaloney6283]

Maybe plays/concerts? Maybe your library has offerings? Treating yourself to a coffee and peoplewatching? I would suggest getting out of the house though, at least a little each day. I hope you find something😍

[@AmbersDaintyBush]

Snowshoeing?

[@isabelleg9118]

Julia Cameron talks about “play dates” in her books on creativity..

[@tanagustoo]

‘no amount of new starts can solve what you’re avoiding inside.’

[@legalmemories]

I am watching this on Thanksgiving day in America in my house by myself because my sons are with their dad. It’s the first year I have not had cook anything or host anyone. I thought I might be a little sad - but I’m actually so happy that for the first time in 20 years I can actually enjoy this day off from work and do exactly what I want. This video is beautiful! ❤

[@the.ashfiles]

Happy thanksgiving to you! Love your outlook! It’s so true, I’ve spent a few holidays over the years and I always thought it would make me depressed. Instead it was so nice to embrace the peaceful nature of the day. ✨ hope you continue to enjoy your day! 🥰🫂

[@thelondoners-lifeisart]

Me too - there’s something beautiful in breaking tradition and finding new space ⚡️❤️💜💙⚡️

[@mystickonekodream]

Amazing experience 🖤

[@ilTHfeaa]

“filling in the blanks of someone else’s blueprint” kinda fkn hit.. never being who i wanted to be bc it wasn’t everyone else’s idea of me or who i should be

[@the.ashfiles]

I’m so glad it resonated with you… I hope you can step into who you want to be more and more ✨

[@JonDesQuest]

As someone who grew up with extremely controlling parents I completely feel you. Now I’m 26 and just trying to make MY life. Not everyone else’s…

[@anilasaleem2158]

All these words are meant for my tired,..daydreamer of a soul that keeps imagining life will get better & magically change for the better if I move abroad

[@the.ashfiles]

I can’t say they will change for the better (as I’ve had my fair share of downs since moving abroad six months ago) but at the same time change in any capacity can help shift things for the better ✨🫂

[@anilasaleem2158]

@the.ashfiles thank u 🤗

[@silvana6746]

I've moved into a new country 2 years ago, if you're still in your home country I just want to tell you "the grass is greener on the other side", sit with it....

[@mandybanga6102]

I’ve lived abroad for five years now. Whilst there has been many good changes, some things have stayed the same, because I am the same person. I spent a long time daydreaming about moving, so mentally it has been better for me. It won’t become something I regretted in later life not doing when it’s no longer possible. I hope it becomes your reality too 😊

[@Jbird1988]

My favorite part of this is learning to say "No" with no excuses. I started this about a year ago and its been fantastic.

[@the.ashfiles]

Such a good feeling right? ☺️✨

[@DianeO-369]

I love that, plain, simple, just .. NO ... no need to explain ❤

[@Jbird1988]

@@DianeO-369 It was awkward at first. But it takes all the stress out. Friends will sometimes ask "why not?" And I'll just tell them that I just dont want that day. Its so simple but provides an immediate improvement on my mood (I tended to be a people pleaser)

[@DianeO-369]

@Jbird1988 , thank you for your response 🙏🏼 I completely understand 'people pleasing'. Yep, they expect more of an answer than just 'NO'. If pressed with 'why not' ... "that's the best answer for me" and leave it at that. If pressed again, you're being bullied or manipulated... that says more about them at that point.

[@wingedhybrid16]

I'm in a similar boat, and it has been a journey. Something that's supposed to be simple (ex: being honest and saying no when you don't want to do something) is a struggle when most of my life, "No," was not a good enough answer. My family didn't respect that, so I learned that saying no was selfish. Staying with family friends has been a huge help. I can say no and they respect it, and they don't ask for any explanations. It felt weird at first, but it's getting better. And it has helped me realize how much my own family took advantage of me growing up (which is a whole separate can of worms that hurts). Knowing that, "No," is an acceptable answer all on its own and will not invoke retaliation is wonderful.

[@lily-lr2ps]

last video i’m watching before deleting youtube off my phone and cutting down my screen time, this is beautiful! the bit about taking life scene by scene is just how i’ve been thinking- your life is every decision you make, not the picture it paints at the end. the hours i spent staring at my phone are just as much parts of my life as any big achievement, regret it or not.

[@the.ashfiles]

Thank you for sharing this-it’s such a grounded and thoughtful way to look at life. Those in-between moments, even the ones we regret, are part of the bigger story we’re living. Wishing you all the best with cutting down your screen time-it sounds like you’re creating space for some really intentional “scenes.”🥰✨

[@Aleatoire9]

“You’re told to tone down the quirks.” This hit me so hard, I’ve moused myself into a corner so that people wouldn’t be offended by me being too weird, too “good” at doing certain things, too out there… I’m crying over this now. Thank you for the wake up call!!!

[@the.ashfiles]

It’s wild how we’re all told to tone down the parts that make us different, like it’s some kind of survival skill. But honestly, playing small never really works, does it? The quirks are where the magic is. I’m so glad this resonated with you-you deserve the space to take up all of it.☺️✨

[@dave0754]

I'm so happy that from the first minutes, I realised that this does not feel like me. I am where I wanted to be and while that was not the initial plan, it is so much better than I could have expected.

[@MaiseNow]

At 5:50 you said "Life is not a project with deadlines". That just blew everything out of the water for me. That's exactly how I treat life--like a work project with an ever-approaching deadline that is never actually reached. So I procrastinate and make excuses and say "good enough for now" because it feels like it's too late to fix anything because The Deadline (tm) is going to hit soon and it's better to have something shitty to turn in as opposed to nothing at all. I keep expecting to be graded for my performance any moment, so there's no time for error or practice. It's gotta be stage-ready from the get-go. And that's not sustainable nor actually possible. I have a lot to think about now. Thank you for sharing your insights in such a succinct and informative way. This is huge. I'm so glad the algorithms sent me to your video today.

[@the.ashfiles]

I’m so happy this piece resonated with you in this way! But it also says a lot about you for recognizing it. A lot of people are quick to shut down their truth when they’re confronted with it… but not you! Messages like this make me so happy and I know you can start to make the small shifts towards treating life in a more present way than with the deadlines. It’s your life, you can go at a pace that works for YOU. No one else - you’ve got this! 🥰✨🙌🏻

[@JordanGordon-Naish]

You are one of the most talented filmmakers on KZbin. The aesthetics, the narration & the lessons are such a needed breath of fresh air, thank you so much!

[@the.ashfiles]

Oh gosh, thank you so much Jordan! I doubt myself every single time I post a video, so reading something as kind as this really means so so much to me ☺️✨

[@incognito595]

That is so well put.

[@weiyigirl]

perfect timing, was crying last night, disappointed about life. woke up and decided to accept that all the fuck ups were experiences meant to be felt. then you came, so perfect for my new chapter! thank you for helping heal little broken hearts, much love 💗

[@the.ashfiles]

Thank you for sharing 🙏🏻 I’m so glad this piece resonated with you and I’m so excited for where you’re heading in life… awareness is step one and the biggest step of all! You’ve got this! 🙌🏻☺️✨

[@alexanderjentes]

The cozy scenes and quiet jazz music really hit home. Time for a reboot!

[@the.ashfiles]

Glad you enjoyed it ☺️✨

[@melanieholstra]

What is this lovely music?

[@xoxocade]

this actually feels like a breath of fresh air. as a closeted trans person i always tend to brush my life off, thinking "i cant be me right now, time isn't right". I gotta get a degree, then get a good job, earn money, think how to move abroad, think if i can move abroad alone, think for how more years i should wait before id catch a glimpse of who i am; when in reality all i do is look how my life slips through my fingers. I don't tell people who I am, thinking they won't accept me, but not even giving them the chance to do so. and maybe I shouldn't wait for a magical moment to happen, or wait for a life I desire, and just let things be as they are. maybe i should learn how to be proud and happy just because this is me thank you for your work, this is truly something so full of life you feel it with your whole heart

[@orangemelon92]

wishing you the best, i hope you can be yourself soon and that people close to you will accept you as you are

[@xoxocade]

thank u very much! I hope for that too

[@the.ashfiles]

Thank you so much for sharing your story and your heart here. I’m deeply moved by your words and your reflections on this journey. It takes so much courage to even put these thoughts into words, and I hope you give yourself credit for that. You’re so right-life isn’t about waiting for the ‘perfect moment.’ You deserve to live authentically as you are, not someday, but today. I’m rooting for you and sending so much support your way as you take these steps toward embracing yourself fully. This is your life, and you deserve to live it fully and proudly. ✨🫂

[@xoxocade]

@@the.ashfiles thank you for those words ☹♡♡

[@blu3bary]

Honestly I’m in the same boat as you and this comment and the video really just kinda put life slipping through my fingers into perspective, it’s been really nice for helping me with trying to get things on track

[@gina-py1mz]

the second you stop caring about what others think, you make room for what *you* think. you start living in a way that feels true to you, not because it looks good on paper or fits neatly into someone else’s expectations but because it’s your life. So, make your choices and trust them.

[@Nilaratna]

Literally 3 seconds into this video, the first I’ve ever seen of yours or this channel, and immediately subscribed. Already, this feels like the nourishment I’ve been needing. 😌

[@the.ashfiles]

@@Nilaratna wow! Thank you so much! 🥹✨ I’m so happy to have you here!

[@MadisonBriggsArtchick]

Same!

[@RenayEmond]

Me tooooo🤗 WoW❣ Subscribed

[@Letstalkaboutit61]

Once you stop lying to yourself about everything your life just opens up. It’s amazing. Simply tell yourself the honest truth and things just become clear. It takes a little time to unlearn all the bullshit we tell ourselves to make us feel good 👍🏾. Just try it. Start with a hour, day, week, month, year, the rest of your life. I also had to learn how to deliver the No’s gently and I’m a pro now. Thank you for this video my dear. It was refreshing.

[@the.ashfiles]

@@Letstalkaboutit61 so glad you liked it! ✨☺️

[@Stolat79]

Well that was a delight. Welcome to the story, learning to say “no” has opened so many more doors than when I said yes to everything. The challenge though is one can become too accustomed to saying “no”, it must be modulated with some “yes’s”. Enjoy the adventure. Xoxo

[@the.ashfiles]

I definitely agree! 🥰✨ there’s balance to be had!

[@Yanecastil1]

Im feeling stuck and i find myself people pleasing all the time so these word were magical! thank you

[@the.ashfiles]

I think people pleasing is more common amongst us than not… and feeling stuck can be a result of that - choosing to put others before ourselves. So happy this piece resonated with you and I hope you can take the small steps to take back YOUR life 🥰✨

[@ErrataStigmata47]

"You want to change jobs, move to a little coastal town, or spend a year writing a novel? Do it" I don't know how to feel about content like this. It's well-intentioned, but the assumptions underlying it are utterly divorced from the lived reality of most people. Most of us don't have the luxury of feeling angst over whether we're following a well-worn path to career success too closely. I'd love to see a version of this video for those of us who are living paycheck to paycheck and not in an unfulfilling relationship because we can't find anyone to love us at all. This just feels like you're giving comfort to those of us who are already exceedingly comfortable.

[@mirandaryan3362]

You can still open your mind and find your way of doing what you want. First step is looking for the crack where the light can come through. It's your life, only you can shape it. It's your choice maybe a 10 minute walk, a daydream, forgiveness/gratitude. Really. Grow some carrot tops in a plate of water.....please.

[@the.ashfiles]

I really appreciate your comment, and I get why that one line might stand out. The thing is, this video isn’t about grand gestures-I even talk about how I tried the big move to London, thinking it would fix everything, and it didn’t. The whole point is that it’s not about quitting your job or moving to a coastal town unless that’s right for you. That line was about not waiting for permission to live your life-whatever that looks like for you. It’s about small, subtle changes that don’t cost anything, like deciding to stop saying yes to things you don’t want or questioning whether the path you’re on is truly yours. I hope when viewed as a whole, the message feels more universal and focused on the everyday shifts we can all make. ✨

[@ErrataStigmata47]

@@the.ashfiles thank you for responding. Your video really was artfully made, with lovely composition and editing. But my issues with it didn’t begin and end with that single line. Maybe read my comment again? Or not - I’m content if this video just wasn’t for me, but for privileged people struggling with more rarefied challenges - like feeling they traded their individuality for material comfort and relationships that are less than perfect. You have talent, and my criticism here mostly comes from a place of wishing you applied it to something that more of us can relate to.

[@the.ashfiles]

I hear you, and I appreciate you sharing your perspective. While I know I’ve been privileged in some ways, this piece wasn’t coming from a place of financial privilege or abundance-it came from my personal experiences, the work I’ve done on myself, and what’s helped me over the years. It’s not about having resources, but about reflecting on the life we’re living and taking small steps to make it feel more like ours. I understand if it didn’t resonate with you, and I don’t expect every piece to connect with everyone’s reality. They simply can’t. But my hope is always to share something honest from my own life that might spark reflection or connection for others. Thank you for watching and for engaging so thoughtfully. ✨

[@betterphlo-1]

I can tell this is something I'll be coming back to again and again. Every other line was a quote just meant to be drawn next to a light switch, on a computer monitor, somewhere it will be seen, somewhere it will be absorbed. This video truly is a work of art and I cannot thank you enough for the work that went into it.

[@the.ashfiles]

Thank you so much, that means the world to me. 🙏🏻✨

[@Sagacifer]

“Just because things don’t look the way you thought they would, doesn’t mean that you’ve gone off-course. And maybe it’s not about sticking to the plan, but about noticing when the path doesn’t feel like yours.”

[@the.ashfiles]

☺️✨

[@worstpersoneve]

hi. you dont me and i dont know you. this is a first that ive ever watched anything by you, but i wanted to let you know that i deeply needed this and thank you for this. these are things that i always tell myself and yet they never make such an impact on me as someone else who’s saying it. as someone who is in their early twenties and ironically questioning themselves in this era, i needed one more sign to keep on going. ive always said nothing truly matters. but what does matter is to us only and how we live our lives. i have always felt this life has never been my own since the moment ive been born. our generation jokes around telling our parents that we never asked to be born but yet here we are without choice. my dad always told me “no you may not have asked but you were chosen.” and with that choice i never knew what to do with it. and with your video, it has been a great reminder of what is needed of ourselves and only ourselves. no one else. so what does matter at the end of the day to ourselves is what we do with our own life as an individual. while there is an importance in who we have in our life, what truly matters is that an individual we are truly happy with ourselves. so along with this video i hope anyone who need it as well remembers it is your life and your life only. you do what truly makes you happy, not at the expense of others or anything else.

[@the.ashfiles]

Thank you so much for sharing this-it’s beautifully put and so full of wisdom. That sense of grappling with what to do with the life we didn’t ask for but were given? I think that’s something so many of us feel but don’t always know how to articulate. Your dad’s words-“you were chosen”-really hit me. That’s such a powerful way to look at it, like there’s meaning in simply being here. I love what you said about life being ours to shape, even when it doesn’t feel like it. It’s true: at the end of the day, what matters is how we live in a way that feels right to us. I’m so glad the video found you at the right time-your comment will stay with me, too.✨☺️🫂

[@giselleswan4559]

“Sometimes you end up right back where you started, but thats not failure- its part of the process”. I really needed to hear that. I recently got scammed and lost a lot of savings and am in a difficult position financially. I am just about to finish my 6th and final year of university and had it all planned out- including plans of moving to a different city. Suddenly, with what happened, I feel like I am back at square one or even -1 and everything feels wasted. This really helps me to remind myself that I didn’t reach a final destination, this is merely a part of the process to get back on track. Everything will be okay. Lovely video and advice. Thank you!

[@the.ashfiles]

Thank you for sharing and it's definitely not you reaching a final destination and definitely not everything is wasted. It's all for learning and it always hurts so much in the moment. You have so much ahead of you though. I'm so sorry for what happened to you, but you have such a good sense of awareness, you're 100% going to be okay. Just keep following that sense of self and curiosity. Wishing you all the best!! ✨

[@deborahmeek6529]

This was nice, the music reminds me of a fancy bar I used to go in when I was young and wait for my roommate to finish work. I had it all figured out but now my kids are 18 and 15 and I am figuring it out again and helping them too figure it out too

[@the.ashfiles]

@@deborahmeek6529 life is just a series of moments where are figuring it out. I don’t think it ever ends.. which is both comforting and scary but at least we’re all doing the same ✨

[@SedatedLynx]

"success is slippery like that. It's always shifting, like us." BEAUTIFUL!! I have never heard it like that told ever and I love it.

[@the.ashfiles]

So glad you resonated with that. ✨

[@deborahgardner7405]

This little film is perfect. Thank you with all of my heart for caring so much to curate each of the gorgeous scenes, and to pair them with ideal music and poignant narration of timeless wisdom. Thank you so much for your very thoughtful reminder that we are blessed with the beauty of living life-in all its simplicity and complexity-one moment and one day at a time, with the personal choice of seeing them as ordinary or extraordinary.

[@the.ashfiles]

Thank you for such a kind and beautiful response, I really appreciate it 🥰✨

[@akifzahin]

"No amount of fresh stars or new cities can solve what you're avoiding inside." This line made me instantly subscribe. I've been thinking about this for such a long time and it's comforting to hear someone else also think the same way. Thank you for making this great video ❤

[@the.ashfiles]

So glad you felt that way and welcome! ✨

[@ClaireEliseLumiere]

In 2023 I spent 6 months living in London for my studies. I'd dreamed for so long of living abroad for a longer period of time, even though personally London wasn't even my dream location (but opportunity struck and I took it). 2024 turned my world upside down in almost every aspect, for honestly all the reasons you mentioned. I spent most of the last year reflecting, figuring out how I got here, what I did wrong. Near the end, I started finding some peace, and actually listening to myself. I'm actually very optimistic about 2025. This video summarized my feelings very well, and honestly, seeing the London scenery brought back so many beautiful memories. Even though during the time it didn't feel like some euphoric dream, to me it represented walking my own path, and doing what feels right even if it isn't perfect. That's what London means to me now, and this video made me realize I can reapply this for my coming life as well. Thank you for this beautiful video and for sharing your thoughts so eloquently, it found me at just the right time

[@the.ashfiles]

Thank you so much for sharing this-it’s amazing how a place like London can take on a new meaning over time, isn’t it? I love how you’ve reframed your experience there-not as a perfect chapter, but as a reminder of walking your own path, even when it’s messy or unexpected. That’s such a powerful mindset to carry into 2025. I’m so glad the video resonated with you and found you at the right moment. Wishing you so much joy and clarity in the year ahead-sounds like you’re stepping into it with exactly the right energy. ❤️✨

[@g_snipe]

"Life doesn't have to look like a straight line to be exactly what you need, it just had to feel like yours." Really feeling this one recently.

[@the.ashfiles]

✨🫂☺️

[@Gill_ii]

Teared up, this was exactly what I needed to hear. I’ve taken a possible permanent hiatus from college, and feel like I’m drifting in my own life. I don’t know what I’ll do next, but after this video I hope my little victories will create the building blocks for finding myself again. Thank you for sharing!!

[@the.ashfiles]

The fact that you have this awareness is huge! It’s going to take you so far! You’ve got this my friend, I’m rooting for you! ✨🙌🏻

[@tanagustoo]

letting yourself be authentic is so life changing, a one day decision to let yourself be yourself (or even learn who you are) can change everything

[@the.ashfiles]

❤️🙏🏻✨

[@DummyStoner]

Thank you for making this video. I’ve been stuck in a loop for years, 2024 was when I finally started breaking away, changing things in my routine, focusing less on video games. I hope I see more progress in 2025, but baby steps are a start!

[@the.ashfiles]

Baby steps really feel like the only manageable way. Good for you for starting, that’s the hardest part! ☺️✨

[@pammitchell3098]

What you said about success is something I've been trying to live and explain for decades.

[@the.ashfiles]

I’m so glad it resonated with you! ✨ thank you for watching!

[@Tim_G_Bennett]

What a wonderful video. :) I'm not coming back to my life, I'm only just starting life at 46. Everything up to now was just surviving, I've had doctors tell me they were very impressed I'm still alive. I started life over at 40 with a dyslexia and autism diagnoses, it's taken me the last 6 years to reframe and rebuild my sense of self. I still have a ways to go but I think I'm through most of it. I know we're not meant to feel behind in life but at 46 I kinda feel like I should of gone on at least one date in my life. Most of my life, well half of my life really I felt dumb and broken somehow but didn't know how, turns out I was trying (and failing) to live a neurotypical life.

[@the.ashfiles]

Thank you so much for sharing this-it takes incredible courage to start over, and your story is so inspiring. Rebuilding your sense of self after such a long journey shows a strength most people can’t imagine. You’re not behind, even if it feels that way sometimes-starting life on your terms at 46 is powerful, and I hope you give yourself credit for how far you’ve come. It’s not easy to live in a world built for someone else’s rules, but you’re showing up as yourself, and that’s what matters most. I’m cheering you on as you continue forward! ✨☺️

[@il4thv]

This video is so inspiring and really made me reflect on my life. It makes me want to work on myself and make positive changes. Honestly, everyone should watch this. You are incredible and the way you express everything is so thoughtful and genuine. I love the calm and relaxing vibe of the video, it is so comforting to watch. I just subscribed and I cannot wait to see all the amazing things you will achieve. You deserve so many subscribers. Wishing you so much success and thank you for creating this!💗

[@the.ashfiles]

@@il4thv this comment made me so teary eyed. What beautiful words. Thank you for taking the time to share and for supporting me. It really means so so much to me ✨🥰🙏🏻

[@curlywillowfinds253]

Wow! I don’t know where to start..I immediately started writing down quotes that “hit home for me.” Every year I hope this will be the year I’m going to turn my life around, I’m in my mid 50’s! Realizing I don’t have to have it all figured out before I can move forward. “pick one rebellion a conversation a plan an expectation you have been living under gently but firmly step away from it. You will feel a shift a tiny freedom that’s when it begins.” Thank you, I needed to hear this on this first day of a new year!

[@the.ashfiles]

I’m so glad this video found you! ✨ happy new year! 🥳

[@Sauceroos]

This is exactly what i needed to hear, for months now. Maybe years. I've been slowly losing myself in the expectations, the deadlines, the social pressure to be "normal". Often i feel so dull and can't recognize myself, and when the real me comes out sometimes there's this deep shame, or guilt for not meeting the expectations of heing the responsible, perfect being I feel like I need to be. Genuinely this video is a piece of art and speaks to me like nothing has in a while. It's about time i started listening to myself, to letting myself live, to experience the world again without stifling myself. I know it starts slow, but also I know it can be done. I know I can feel like myself again. Thank you.

[@the.ashfiles]

I’m so glad this resonated with you. It’s so easy to lose ourselves in the noise of expectations, isn’t it? But you’re right-it starts slow, and giving yourself permission to live, little by little, is where it begins. You’re not alone in this, and I hope you keep listening to that part of yourself that wants to BE again. Thank you for sharing ✨🫂

[@cittisparks]

the quiet catharsis i'm experiencing in the middle of the work day because of this is insane thank you so much

[@the.ashfiles]

I’m so happy it resonates with you 🫂✨☺️

[@Mystic_Paths]

Acknowledging your true self without judgment, allows you to make authentic decisions that align with your values.

[@phooeymoo]

This beautiful video has found me when I needed it most, lost at 22 years old and feeling like I've already failed myself. But now I feel like I've been given a second wind. Thank you for putting these words out into the universe and inspiring me to start living for myself instead of others. Sending lots of peace and love ❤️

[@the.ashfiles]

22 is such a tricky age-society makes it feel like you should have everything mapped out already, but honestly, that’s just not real life. You’ve got so much time ahead of you to figure it out, and starting to live for yourself now is such a powerful move. I’m rooting for you.✨☺️ 🫂

[@minnybiker4505]

I redelegated a task at work today... It was something I helped out with while we were shorthanded. I told the new person it was their responsibility starting tomorrow. I sent a text to my boyfriend today that we need to talk soon. Our relationship is... Fine. We're friends, but that's it. I'm planning to change course tomorrow. Lastly, I need a new job. My job pays the bills, and I work from home, and the car industry sucks... But I can't stop thinking about going back into being a car salesman. I just really enjoy helping people find the right car for them. I'm not profit hungry, I'm solution hungry. The hours suck, and I'm sure it's not always roses. I'm terrified to leave what I have... But I can't stop wondering if I'd be happier.

[@OkieGal2]

I just gave notice at my well paying job pushing tons of reports, emails and sitting alone in my cushy private office because I know I’m meant to have a job being in front of people, helping them. You going back to sales sounds like a great choice for you!

[@the.ashfiles]

Thank you for sharing all of this-it sounds like you’re navigating a lot of big decisions all at once, and that takes so much courage. It’s not easy to question what’s ‘fine’ and wonder if something better is out there, but that curiosity is such a powerful guide. I love how passionate you are about helping people in your industry-it’s clear that solving problems and connecting with others really lights you up. Whatever path you choose, I hope you give yourself credit for all the thought and care you’re putting into these decisions. Sending you so much support as you figure out what happiness looks like for you! ☺️✨

[@minnybiker4505]

@@the.ashfiles thank you so much for the reply! I did end the relationship, and continuing to delegate more at work, but still can't take the leap to quit. Hopefully I can set myself up with a better job soon. But your response made me tear up a bit. It has been a stressful year. Thank you.

[@the.ashfiles]

​​⁠ thank you for sharing this update-it sounds like you’ve been making some really tough but important moves. Ending a relationship and setting boundaries at work are no small feats, especially during such a stressful year. Take your time with the next steps; even small shifts are still progress. I have no doubt you’ll find that better job when the time is right, and until then, I’m cheering you on every step of the way. Sending you so much strength and hope for the year ahead-you’ve got this! ❤️🫂✨

[@Bassynater2500]

Thanks for this, I needed a reminder that I don’t have to be complacent to meet everyone else’s expectations. I can also have some agency and choice in my life.

[@the.ashfiles]

100% - I’m glad that came through for you ✨☺️

[@ALEXD4WN]

I’ve decided to start my transition in 2024, I always hear my friends and family (and my own inner voice) all saying “what if it goes wrong?” And the answer to that question isn’t simple and I have considered not doing it but I know now that isn’t an option, so when someone asks “what happens if it goes wrong?” My reply is “I’ll handle it, because I’ll have to”

[@the.ashfiles]

Your determination and self-awareness are so powerful. I admire the courage it takes to embrace what feels right for you, even when the questions are difficult. Sending you a big hug! ✨🫂

[@AngelTwelveScoop]

"You can't get away from yourself by moving from one place to another." - Ernest Hemingway, The Sun Also Rises. I tried the moving away. I tried the moving back. I realized that it wasn't going to fix anything for me - I needed to accept the things of myself I don't love. And that is where the journey is beginning again for me. It's helping me be more mindful of what it is I have never been. Thanks for this video. I needed it.

[@the.ashfiles]

I think it’s such an important thing to realize but not all of us are fortunate to have the awareness. It’s hard, for sure, but necessary. Thank you for sharing and for being here ✨☺️

[@AlbertaJane]

"Success is slippery like that." Oh, this found me right at the point. Very nice. Great film.

[@the.ashfiles]

I’m so glad it resonated with you! ✨

[@natalijaoconnell4215]

I have watched this video every day for the last 7 days. And it's really been helping me go through a horrific marriage break down. It makes me feel like even though I have big feelings, that the grief is immense... so is the joy.. ✨🙏

[@the.ashfiles]

Thank you so much for sharing this. I’m so sorry you’re going through such a difficult time, but I’m incredibly touched that this video has brought you even a little bit of comfort. Your strength in embracing both the grief and the joy is so inspiring. Sending you so much love and healing energy as you navigate this. 🫂❤️✨

[@ivorymoon-ooo]

all very good points, but if I may add (for my fellow Christians or really anyone who believes in God): when you start making one's own journey spiritually, mentally, emotionally, and in my case, when you become closer to God, everything just starts falling into place and nothing feels bad or by some script anymore. I handed the pen to my maker instead of to other people, and life is good. (not trying to push my beliefs on others here, just wanted to share my experience and God’s grace ❤)

[@nandrasingh270]

i love the few seconds of silence at the end. after really heartfelt words, just taking a moment to let it soak in, watching beautiful views, reminding ourselves to just be in the present moment, and live

[@the.ashfiles]

So glad you enjoyed it! ✨☺️

[@phoebe2234]

You don't have to settle, you don't have to pretend everything is fine when they are actually not.... i recently stood up to my narcissistic mother in law, and her daughter. It was actually horrible and she turned everyone against me and did awful awful things but my husband is standing by me. He's upset and shocked but sees her behaviour for the first time. I will never see those people again and ive never felt happier.

[@the.ashfiles]

I’m so happy your husband is on your side. I understand how difficult that dynamic is but I’m so glad you stood up for yourself ☺️✨

[@Aleatoire9]

I’m only four minutes in but this is amazing. Thank you! Also, your shots of London make me miss it so much. I visited/briefly lived there four times in 2017 & 2018 and can’t quite believe it’s been six years since I’ve been back 😢

[@the.ashfiles]

Ah, London is such a beautiful city! I hope you get to visit again soon ✨

[@Hyacsho]

I've been in my industry for 15 years, maybe more, and I'm about to leave it and the city I live in to pursue tattooing. I cannot resonate enough with your point of "someone else's life", this isn't the one I want, it's the one that was expected.

[@the.ashfiles]

This change is so exciting! And tattooing?! How cool! I don’t know you but I’m proud of you! It’s hard to step out on your own, against everyone’s expectations, but you have to do it for yourself, it’s YOUR life! Wishing you all the best on this new adventure! ✨

[@LewisElwind]

I adore your style of filming and editing, it reminds me of the way you’d talk to a friend at a coffee shop over the weekend. Picking apart what you did during the week and what could’ve gone better and what you did right. It’s a friendly chat, and while the message doesn’t specifically apply to me. The reminder that giving a solid simple No is always an option, is always appreciated. As is the reminder that when you're cultivating your own path, don't ask for anyones permission.

[@the.ashfiles]

Wow, this is such a thoughtful comment-thank you so much! I love that it feels like a coffee shop chat to you, because that’s exactly the kind of vibe I hope to create: casual but meaningful. And yes, a solid ‘No’ and not asking for permission are such underrated superpowers. I’m so glad the message resonated, even in a small way. Appreciate you taking the time to share this! ✨☺️

[@evdavila1287]

Loved this and immediately sent it to my sister. I am in NJ and she is in LA. Before COVID we’d meet somewhere to spend some time together. In 2017 we visited Paris and London. After watching this beautiful video we are inspired to return and see it all again. Beautiful! ❤ TY

[@the.ashfiles]

Awww I love this! I lived in LA for 10 years, and love that you find time to meet somewhere to spend that time together. You are so lucky! (I always wanted a sister)… I hope your next adventure together is the best one yet 🥰✨

[@BLACKHEART99FLY]

I love this. For the first time a KZbin video invites me to slow down an re examine all of these aspects of life that we think are important but really aren’t and to focus on living ❤ in the most honest way

[@the.ashfiles]

What a beautiful thing to say, thank you so much. So glad it moved you in this way ✨

[@sykopenguin12]

I got pushed into this. Got fired from a job I was trying to leave. Saved by a friend on the rebound. Then. Quietly. Slowly. Kept walking toward the life I have left.

[@clara2971]

It's amazing to realize how many of us walk similar paths without even knowing it. I don't know how KZbin came to put this video in the suggestions to watch next below another one (about an entirely different thing), but I'm glad it did. I'm also really glad I clicked on it. This hit so close to home that it brought me to tears. Thank you for putting into words many things I've been feeling recently, but that I didn't think made sense or were valid.

[@the.ashfiles]

Thank you so much for sharing this-it means a lot to hear that the video resonated with you in such a deep way. It’s incredible how these shared experiences can connect us, even through something as random as KZbin suggestions. I’m so glad this found you at the right time and gave words to feelings you’ve been holding. You’re not alone in this, and your feelings are always valid. Sending you so much love and gratitude! 🥰🫂✨

[@tayaaliz4088]

3:10 I without hesitation signed up for weekly dance classes in Canada. I had just went for a weekend and was reminded of a dance studio i wanted to attend during the pandemic. I did it and made the commitment without ASKING my job first about my schedule. I went in the next shift and requested new availability. They denied it, I talked to my manager and firmly asked why? told them they have two options, either that availability or another two days for another course. They realized i was serious, and they agreed to another availability. It was the first time i didn’t let my job decide for me in full.

[@Cinnamonrollssan]

As small as some people might see this, this is such a big victory in our minds and our hearts can definitely feel said victory / achievement, I can imagine how air felt lighter after they agreed

[@tayaaliz4088]

@ yes! i was very proud of myself for being stern about my decision. I felt very accomplished

[@the.ashfiles]

This is such a power move, and I love to see it! Prioritizing yourself and standing firm on what you need is no small thing-major kudos to you for making it happen. That dance class sounds like it’s going to be so worth it! ✨🥰

[@tayaaliz4088]

@ awww i really appreciate your kind words and kudos!

[@captainsquest4860]

This has already become a morning ritual to watch, to keep the message fresh, and to make me feel like I can make a difference, no matter how small today, to make my life just a bit better.

[@the.ashfiles]

This comment means so much to me, I’m so glad it’s resonated with you in this way ✨🥹🫂

[@TheFurgue703]

It has been some time since I've felt this pressure against my chest, this emptiness inside never leaves me just like how I feel nothing towards most people and life itself. Once I finish my classes today I will go back to this video so I can watch it fully❤

[@the.ashfiles]

I hope it resonates with you in some way 🫂✨

[@CoastalKite]

This video has consistently been in my feed for a few months now. I decided to finally watch, not realizing I’ve seen your other videos already about your move to London. I’ve been very fortunate to have accomplished my major career goals by 30. Now, I have found myself slowly letting go right now and I don’t know what is next or even what I want. For now, what I do know is this: • I am subscribing • I really enjoy your artistic style and talks • I am very close to figuring out who I am and where I’m headed

[@the.ashfiles]

Thank you so much for being here and for clicking on the video. Funny, my next video is a follow up to this one about ‘what to do when you don’t know what to do’ essentially. Congratulations on achieving your career goals and at such a young age. There’s so much opportunity out there for you whether it’s lead by career or personal circumstance. Just stay open and the right thing will find you ✨🫂☺️

[@CoastalKite]

@ thank you so much for the reply. I’ll be on the lookout for that video! 👀

[@kobidanielle2096]

“life isn’t about ticking boxes, it’s about making room for the things that actually matter.”💘

[@the.ashfiles]

☺️✨

[@raramama]

"Lets be honest, no one's ever really remembered for being the person who did what everyone else wanted." Wow!😮 Profound.👏✨️

[@the.ashfiles]

Thank you! 🥰✨🙏🏻

[@DaysePessoa]

“Who wants to be normal when you can be interesting” ❤️

[@michael.matarrese-cs5tw]

I think 90% of the world needs to see this video. This is so liberating I really needed to hear this. It’s life-changing whoever you are you are no joke. Thank you for the wisdom. I’m gonna share it with as many people as I know a lot of people.

[@veritehunter2191]

Wow! Cant believe this came up on my timeline- I've got 2 months left of my job- then I'm taking a year out to travel. I'm going through a moment right now- finding moments of joy and god, in quiet moments- Knowing I defiantly need to get out of the city. I know I release my perfectionism and start living my life for me- my mum has currently got cancer and has been an alcoholic my whole life- its like this whole burden rock I've carried my whole life which is not mine. I want to move to Australia- thanks so much for making this video.

[@the.ashfiles]

I’m so glad to hear this resonated with you… and I’m so excited for you to have this adventure ahead of you! Enjoy every moment ✨

[@rebeccasmith7439]

The g in God needs to be capitalized 💯

[@makmax8046]

I can't possibly imagine the amount of effort that went into making this video. You have created something profoundly resonant. Thank you for putting the journey into words and for your vulnerability. The world is a much better place with you in it.

[@the.ashfiles]

Wow, thank you so much, I really appreciate the kind words ☺️✨

[@juliesmith6228]

Your dog is adorable! 😍💗 I love how you share exploring London... perfect! And yes... life ISN'T a dress rehearsal, there’s very few do overs so >>enjoy

[@the.ashfiles]

Thank you! 🥰✨

[@sharlotececilia]

I like how you take your dog everywhere with you

[@the.ashfiles]

Thank you 🥰✨🙏🏻

[@bradfordcrowderart]

Exquisite. The images, the music, the insights. Absolutely exquisite. Thank you.

[@the.ashfiles]

Thank you so much! ☺️🙏🏻

[@jerzoslaw]

This is such a heartwarming video. Please keep up the good work it helps a lot especially peeps feeling lost in their lives.

[@the.ashfiles]

I’m so glad you feel that way, and I’m happy it resonated with you. Definitely more to come! ✨

[@Rua-9871]

Thank you for the comforting words and capturing London in such a beautiful way 🤍

[@the.ashfiles]

I’m so glad you enjoyed it 🥰✨

[@shraddhakamini243]

The script,the cinematography,the vision ,wowwwww 😭💆🏻‍♀️💕💕💕

[@the.ashfiles]

Thanks! ✨

[@RAiNE_ARTIST]

Your video is stunning! Your voice is very soothing and perfect for the subject matter and the visual aesthetics are enchanting.. Thanks for sharing.

[@the.ashfiles]

@@RAiNE_ARTIST thank you so much! That’s so kind! 🥰✨

[@Lady-Y]

Thank you. Without knowing it, or even meaning to, you have resurrected me.

[@the.ashfiles]

So happy to hear that ✨🫂

[@maureenseel118]

I'm at this phase in my life. I found myself in a life I didn't recognize and was deeply unhappy. I am figuring out what my little rebellions need to be.

[@the.ashfiles]

I’m so glad to hear you recognized this… it’s the hardest part! 🫂✨

[@mariyaavg]

I love how well you discuss the idea that making a change is in the little moments we choose to be honest with ourselves and how a lot of other humans just wants us for all that we are, not just the highlights. Some of my favourite points, thank you for your video!

[@the.ashfiles]

Thank you so much, I’m so glad it spoke to you in this way! ☺️✨

[@In_time]

2:12 Lol, I _felt_ that. And very glad to hear this is actually how it starts. I stopped responding in the office group texts. It’s felt glorious.

[@the.ashfiles]

@@In_time we can’t put our time into things that don’t serve us… congrats to you for starting! It’s a big step! Doesn’t it feel good?✨☺️

[@serinaelizabeth4126]

I needed this so much. It was so spot on. I coincidentally moved back home end of 2019 right before the pandemic without a plan, and been here since. I can’t believe it’s been 5 years. Within this time span I’ve taken on a lot more responsibilities than I had prior; I’ve been a people pleaser all over again and have felt like I’ve been reliving my teen years which has resulted in childhood wounds resurfacing. I’ve grown to realize a lot of things about my family & really put into perspective how they are and always will be let alone their perceptions of me. The longer I’m here the longer I notice the favoritism of siblings & the role I’m stuck with of being the oldest… as if I’m forced to always be the person to say yes & do everything otherwise I’m the bad guy. Some environments don’t allow you to grow and since I’ve been here for the last 5 years I haven’t grown much compared to how much I did when I wasn’t living at home. I feel like I backtracked. Sorry for steering into the deep end but this resonated so much. I love my family but they dim my desires and dreams. In 2025 I really want to choose myself & not care if my decisions make anyone upset. I need to do what’s best for me and keep the spark in me alive. Moving out again has been on my mind for sometime.. I want to explore living in New York even if it means being on my own.

[@the.ashfiles]

Thank you so much for sharing Serina! I couldn’t agree with you more and I really do understand where you’re coming. I’m so glad you’re taking life into your own hands for 2025 and I’m so excited for you! Just keep moving in that direction, one step at a time ❤️🫂✨

[@JettaTeleVolksCaster]

I am 26 years old and I am in tears because for the first time in my life, I’m actually free in believing I’m exactly who I’m supposed to be at exactly the right time and anyone who doesn’t like it can take their opinions and shove it.

[@the.ashfiles]

This is the energy we all need! It’s such a powerful moment when you can stand fully in who you are and own it without apology. I’m so glad this resonated with you-here’s to keeping that freedom and letting everyone else’s opinions stay exactly where they belong: far away from your happiness! ☺️✨

[@JettaTeleVolksCaster]

@ Thank you so much for the reply! Last night I heard 4444 hz frequency and today a license plate 4444. In addition the Geminide meteor shower is tonight and I am a Gemini. 13 truly is my lucky number and I’ve been seeing that a LOT. AND A RAINBOW IN BROAD DAYLIGHT. Today IS the day!

[@NexLegacyAccount]

"What if you already are?" I don't think I realized just how badly I needed to hear that right now..got me tearing up.

[@the.ashfiles]

🥹🫂✨

[@DanDieselFX]

That “Second Diet Coke of the day” felt like a personal attack lol. The authenticity alone in that one sentence makes this feel very genuine

[@the.ashfiles]

It's my vice! Sounds like it might be yours too! ✨

[@michael.matarrese-cs5tw]

Just the most talented filmmaker, the best motivational speaker, and the realist. You are a blessing

[@the.ashfiles]

Wow, that means so much to me, thank you! ✨

[@Frenchstarfish3]

So well written, well said, great scenes, soothing music, great advice. Exactly where I am and have been so many times. Thank you.

[@the.ashfiles]

@@Frenchstarfish3 thank you so much! ✨

[@emilyb6166]

This video was like a compassionate hug and pep talk from a friend all in one. The combo of your narrative and the scenery is wonderful 💛

[@the.ashfiles]

Thank you so much Emily! 🥰✨

[@SoulCareOver50]

It's beautiful to see London in a story 😍

[@the.ashfiles]

🥰✨

[@jacquelinemcgowan8164]

To me it is about being true to yourself, something at 63yrs I have failed at miserablly at.

[@the.ashfiles]

Never too late to start Jacqueline 🥰✨🫂

[@ath_draw]

We are really in such a rush, I am trying to slow down and think carefully about my decision before it’s too late Thank you for the comforting advice

[@the.ashfiles]

Anytime! 🥰✨

[@shraddhakamini243]

Oh my god this felt like a 18 minute hug ,actually the best 18 minutes ever ,thankyou for doing what you are doing ,i love you ❤

[@the.ashfiles]

Aw thank you so much! 🥰✨

[@mottavisuals]

This video is literaly what I'm going trough right now

[@the.ashfiles]

🫂✨☺️

[@amadeuscrossing7061]

I think Gemini is running the new algorithm and it knows our hopes, dreams and desires. And it’s trying to optimize what we need. This is a beautiful video expressing my delight of what I’ve been experiencing lately

[@the.ashfiles]

What a beautiful things to say - thank you so much 🥹✨🙏🏻

[@martingoo]

thank you for this, caught myself genuinely smiling for the first time in a long time, and felt myself breathing a little easier :)

[@the.ashfiles]

@@martingoo oh wow! What an honor that it moved you in such a way. I’m so glad it resonated with you ✨🫂☺️

[@ceejay2792]

I know this post is 3 weeks old but I have just discovered your channel. Everything you say is spot on, even for me at my slightly more advanced stage of life. I retired 9 months ago and like many have had some transition trauma. This video is just what I needed. I look forward to your next with great anticipation. Thank you.

[@the.ashfiles]

Thank you so much! It's never too late to reclaim your life, even in retirement 😊✨

[@fuludude]

This video feels like the older sister that hasn’t seen me in a while, and starts talking about life with me at a family holiday

[@the.ashfiles]

I love that it comes across that way ☺️✨