Toxic People | This is what they're doing to your life

[@Ilovesushi123456]

I want more people like her at my party.

[@iloveefluffd6645]

Cam go find them :)

[@julieclarke3818]

same

[@sidlopes4429]

Cam , you got that,

[@beenilsson7076]

🙌🙌💛🌾🌅🌟🙏🏻🌠🌟

[@EmpressofChrist]

Exactly!

[@crimsonskiss]

Toxic people only have power because they know that you think you need them. Act like you know you don't need/depend on them and bam, all their power is gone.

[@skylar_kada]

Nothing is more true than this statement! And I’m trying to implement this rn.

[@kommando1476]

What about its a family member and he can take a do whatever he wants bc the dad don't know he dose dope and knows the other brother dose. And don't trust the so-called bad brother and luv the bad one and the good brother can't do or say anything bc he don't snitch for anything.

[@EmpressofChrist]

I needed this thank u

[@padsan1000]

Going to do this. Thanks for help

[@kaitlynkarol4600]

@@kommando1476 - I know it's late in replying to this 1 yr old vid, but I had to reply b/c I can relate to this & I am working on an article about this....it's all due to control issues. The parent who chooses to always take the side of the bad kid vs the good one - it's usu an issue of the bad kid is the one the parent helps or thinks they can help or aka, 'control'. The good kid/ sibling who has their life together - the parent won't listen to or 'have their back" or side w/ them or at least it appears this way b/c the parent can't control the good kid b/c they need no 'help' or control. See? People can't find where or how they're needed if we find ways to live healthy and good. It's no diff than big Pharma & the system and the evil rulers of the world - they don't want us to have easy access to herbs and good food, vitamins, b/c those things are good for us and offers us ways to be proactive. But they feel needed and can make more $$ when they make us sick w/ bad foods and such, just so they can send us over to the Pharmacy drugs, etc....When we live independently, the rulers and controllers of our world start to feel insecure b/c they don't feel needed and they usu act out as control freaks, fascists, tyrants, etc. Mental illness is mental illness - despite what various forms it comes in!

[@monyaga4889]

I've noticed the more I avoid toxic people....even family ...I am happier, healthier, more relaxed, creative, effective at work. A lot of people give you a plan for your life....and they are not even successful in their own life, ha....ha. Staying with supportive, kindhearted, loving people is essential....but "shitty people" teach us great LESSONS and we become more mature and wise ....thank you for MARVELLOUS SPEECH!!! I love youuuu

[@soulrevive9715]

They hate when you treat them how they treat you. I just wish I met better people. Its not easy.

[@estheradao]

SoulRevive true

[@fajerbokhamsin3052]

Blood is thicker than water and SHIT is thicker than BLOOD! Love your references!

[@ah-ss7he]

💩 💩 💩

[@rrubywoo11]

Your videos should be shown on a national television as a life guidence

[@nurology]

+teasmiljkovic Haha, you are so sweet!!

[@catalinaperezdominguez2635]

Seriously! She shitted with this video in a good way lbvfs! This shit is so true!! All of this is the key to happiness and living a meaningful life! I really needed this video in my life no fucking bs!! I'm in an abusive relationship struggling with addictio. I'm a mess tbh so thank u for posting this.

[@lovehaterelationship4281]

I strongly agreeddd

[@mattiethesurfer]

Sh*tnado! HahAha. Really good video. Thank you for making and posting this video.

[@habonahmed8604]

Like y.our video

[@chipontogwa4081]

toxic people are dangerous ...they just simply want your life to get derailed

[@alextorres6146]

Chipo Ntogwa that's what defines them as toxic just like my step father and his family

[@Alexis-ec9cl]

This is a reason I gravitate towards quieter people - Like myself. I see right through the loud girl at work, the overly nice one that is a people pleaser, the ones that are too bossy and brass or overly sarcastic. I stay closer to people like myself who don't really over do anything. They're just there, doing their job. You don't know much about them. They are level headed, aren't people pleasers. Etc. I would say i'm certainly somewhere in that realm. I'm calm, i'm not perfect but i'm also not trying to be someone i'm not. I get my work done, don't cause drama and i stay out of it. And i am a strong believer of keeping life and work separate. the more they dont know, the better. I don't want to know about your dog, your boyfriend, your mom or the like. I am here to work, and if it's important let me know. But i won't reject conversation, I just listen.

[@liviegracexo8100]

God you literally just spoke directly to me... I swear.

[@trudylethuba5645]

I feel that way too.....

[@FIFO333]

bitch i be feeling like that too

[@jessicalouise9140]

Some people subconsciously want to stay living on their desert island, misery loves company. They'd happily like a bit of sunshine on their desert island so they can suck the joy out of you. Cut them out.

[@prettyme4387]

The toxic people in my life destroyed everything: My reputation My passions My friendships My happiness My sanity

[@shawn170204]

Reading the comments so many people say their parents are toxic. This is sad because what parents don't realize is that it's their kids they're going to rely on as elderly people. Always treat your kids with respect and love because one day your going to need them at your bedside.

[@jatvirginmega]

She just turned my day, no week, NO year around. Amazing how powerful she is.

[@Babesinthewood97]

A person who is being or have been abused, bullied, raped, beaten, slandered, violated etc, for example as a result of having toxic people in their family or other relatipns, will be depressed, unhappy. May seem "negative" to some. They need to get away from the abuse, get some help, get some support and they'll be fine. Depressed is not toxic. Toxic is: being abusive. The abusers are the toxic people. Such as bullies, or people who try to make you feel horrible even though you have done nothing to deserve it.

[@yvonnechynwa]

please Anna,can u review the solution to dis problem. I experienced dis in my family and noticed it follows me wherever I go.whom to seek advice from.please, help.

[@goddessvibes08]

Anna Blomqvist This comment deserves to be pinned on the top.

[@fazzzz5710]

Thank u.

[@marinettedupaincheng4749]

chinonye Anyadiegwu* let them know u are not afraid of them you are not alone

[@Madri_QueenCard]

@@yvonnechynwa In my case, therapy helped greatly. But beware a lot many therapists are scams. Like this one lady who would indirectly tell me that my feelings are weird and only recommend breathing exercises.. But after a couple more weird ones I found the right one who actually discusses my issues and trauma. All the best 👍🏻

[@novack7635]

toxic people takes all of your energy and finnaly your soul, take danger cose of them.dont left your self open to love them,they destroy you..they never feel good,because the bad have inside them its more strong than the good you want to give them.so they destroy everything.

[@willzer808]

this is an excellent way to describe it

[@dm-dy4ie]

I think that they are just so unhappy with THEMSELVES, ANNNNND the crazy thing about it, is that THEY WILL ALWAYS FEEL THAT WAY UNTIL THEY GO TALK TO SOMEBODY ABOUT HOW THEY FEEL ABOUT THEMSE

[@amnaakhan5288]

Novack yess that's it!!! i tried sooo hard but that toxic person never change although it breaks me into pieces

[@willzer808]

Alexis Monje learn flexibility

[@nickharley2344]

Extremely accurate. My mom is this way.

[@trishschmidt8530]

Just stay away or distance yourself away from negative people! Now like she said, maybe someone is negative in a moment or a brief time because they are going through something, but stay away from those whiners, complainers, critical people who like to focus on the negative and never seem to be able to enjoy their lives.

[@pattymeza]

I love everything about this video. Five years ago I cut out my relationships with most of my family members and it's crazy how many positive things came from it. Sometimes you have to step back and love yourself first!

[@nurology]

+Patty Meza 100%!!! Happy to hear that!

[@josejimenaz]

Yes love yourself Justin beiber

[@jessicalouise9140]

I've recently cut out a couple of toxic friends. One was the type that regularly flakes out on plans and only ever contacted me enough to keep the friendship going. As soon as she didn't have any plans or became single she'd want to know me again. The other friend was extremely negative and would call me near enough everyday either for advise or to moan some say "that's what friends are for" but it isn't when it drags them down. If ever I didn't answer a call or message shed send me a massive text saying how I'm ignoring her for no reason and wants to know why and what she's done and it became to much I told her, I like my own space she continued so i stopped all communication the funny thing is, she then deleted me off of social media as I was no longer feeding into her negativity. I feel a weight is lifted.

[@Bohemianbella1]

Jessica Louise91 I have the similar issue, I have a friend who is constantly negative... she messaged me everyday and even if I ignore her message she still persists. It’s full of complaints about any little thing from lightning in the sky to someone smoking next door.. honestly it is so draining and if I’m having a good day and read her message I feel down again. I honestly feel like she wants me to feel like crap and join in on her misery. I’ve now decided to ignore her messages because it is too negative and she never ever has anything good to say.

[@lexurwexur]

whenever I am having anxiety, you somehow save me. You're the best, thank you for being so amazing.

[@nurology]

Touched by this comment. Happy I can help 💙

[@vtsc613]

can you make a video on how to make quality friends and find them? I recently have gone through the process of cutting out the shit in my life, but now I can't seem to find those quality people to bring to my party. My standards aren't too high and too crazy, its just hard making friends and finding people with the same values.

[@Michael-fl7vt]

vtsc613 I find its best to make friends through toxic people who aren't toxic and then become socially independent from them and cut them out of your life

[@youngrosco4515]

vtsc613 this was written a year ago... but I hope you found true friends. sometimes been on your own is better than being with users and abusers

[@JoseHernandez-lm3hs]

Any good luck finding good quality friends ?

[@shelbyhardin6384]

CHRISTIAN CHRISTZLIKE HEARTED!!!!! I LOVE GOD J LOVE PPL!!! LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL & NON-TOXIC FRIENDS R TOO, UR RIGHT!!!!!!

[@johnrod007]

vtsc613 Same here it's hard to find people the show the same consideration that you would show towards someone else

[@fifi2421]

Your analogies are helping people learn how to handle and dispose waste, meaning they are reducing and preventing pollution, thus you are ultimately saving the world from shit! Once again, incredible video Nur.

[@lr4439]

yes :) beautifully stated

[@uknowthevibe]

Your "party shitting" analogy is actually pretty helpful 😂 I needed this, thanks so much for making these videos.

[@Learninghowtorebuild]

I am in a relationship right now that's very toxic. we argue everyday, over nothinggggg. it's so draining, that my head hurts for days. I feel like I can't be myself with this person. If I am being goofy , he calls me childish, if I am serious, he say I take everything personal. I feel stuck and unhappy . I don't wanna be with him but I feel like I have to because I have a child with him. it's more to why I feel stuck but some days I rather be dead then with him. he knows I'm a good woman and just keep saying things to make me feel I'll never find any one better .

[@Alexis-ec9cl]

lossit4good he's trapping you. get out

[@lourieorozco7483]

Omg you just described my life to perfection 😢😢 i tried leaving yesterday but he promissed everything would be better im so confused.! Help me

[@Manningf]

Wow I thought this was just me who’s life was like this ....

[@lovechild9346]

Been there leave GOD will supply all of your needs leave!!!!!

[@tonywalker1954]

Get Out NOW

[@awesomearab13]

Please come back to KZbin. I have come back to this video so many times throughout the years. You’re the only person who empowered me to kick the toxic people out of my life rather than enable them like everyone else

[@ivispark3780]

Bottom line, don’t be a hypocrite. If you want good friends, be a good friend. Still, so folks will slip through, and it happens... but we get better at pruning them as we grow and learn. Thanks for the pep talk... just dealt with a group of straight up sh*tting people at my party.

[@mansoryO]

toxic and unintelligent people combined are the worst. especially those you've known for 10/20 years but i did it. i cut off childhood friends because they stopped caring about me when i still make sacrifices for them.(i've skipped exams, cancelled flights, gave a few thousands in cash for an "emergency", take abuse when theyre in a bad mood ) i could not disrespect myself by taking anymore. love this video shows me im not just anti social

[@dshae2293]

Thank you so much for pointing out the difference between someone who is toxic and someone who is just going through something.

[@vt-yp7yq]

Spot on advice. Once I cleaned out bs so called friends and family, I've been happy. I want reciprocity and if you don't bring the same I offer, I have no use for you. Toxic people are everywhere, don't settle because you're afraid to be alone. There's nothing wrong with being alone.

[@mikebertram619]

I'm so far ahead of this video. But I wish I would have had it 10 years ago when I REALLY went to work on my life. Better yet, got it when I was about 15. My family is the most toxic people in my life. And after going thru therapy many times , and hearing " it's ok to avoid your family because they are toxic." , it finally sunk in about 8 years ago.. So let me tell you ; Every word this gal says is true !

[@amyritch5370]

I rewatched this video again today after almost a year and am so incredibly glad that I did. It's relevant to me today in a way it wasn't then. I needed the reminder that I'm in control. Clean up time! 😉

[@swoosh3684]

Blocked someone who I felt disrespected me. Whether I overreacted or not, I just can't do the drama anymore.

[@marinettedupaincheng4749]

Melisa you made the right choice

[@kidando16]

I agree with everything you've said in this video! Lately, my personal motto has been, 'no on helped me figure my life out; i'm not here to help anyone figure out theirs' :)

[@nurology]

+kidando16 Love it! We have to cut our losses!

[@Alexis-ec9cl]

nurology yup

[@madelon5978]

I tried watching so many videos on this subject because I have a problem of letting toxic people linger and feed off my life, and I never was able to connect on a mental level with any of the KZbinrs I watched. That is, until I found you. Thank you so much for making this video. I plan on watching more of your videos. I love how it feels like you're just having a conversation with me. It doesn't feel staged or planned. Thank you.

[@kimdavis7058]

Very well said! I too did my cleaning of all the toxic people (including all family members) and I now living a happy life. I like your analogy of "shitting" because thats exactly what it boils down too. Great video!

[@peekay9310]

Please don't ever stop sharing your knowledge. You have no idea how much it helps some of us. I listen to your videos over and over at home or driving to work and now that I'm actually taking action, I've seen what huge impact it can make on my life. Life is what you make it. Thanks Nur!

[@nayonikaashetty]

You just made it more clear for me on how to stop giving people chances. I feel like I have been taken for granted a lot of times by people and it’s not like I was a perfect person, it’s that I KNOW that I didn’t deserve all that. And after watching this video I have realised SO many things. Thank you so much. This made so much sense.

[@everydaychannel]

I'm gonna turn shit to gold.

[@magicadespell56]

I have found the more stable you feel you are the more broken people you attract - you try and save them. Yet like things attract maybe nobody is stable!!! HAHAHAHAHA! omg. God I love you!

[@nurology]

+Shelly Block LOL!!! Love you, Shelly!!!!!!

[@ChapterStackss]

"...and shit is thicker than blood." Dead. 😂

[@nurology]

+ChapterStackss LOL!!!!!! I'm so glad you caught that 😉

[@strangerdaysss]

was gonna quote that until i saw that you already did lol but thanks for that line nur it's the one punch that i've been needing. it really hit that nonexistent itch spot.

[@darkwolf41nite53]

ChapterStackss that's right

[@ASMRGRATITUDE]

ChapterStackss shit-nado!

[@heyjinglebells]

your videos are amazing. I can't click out of them (literally first youtuber I've watched videos straight through that are over 10 minutes long). You make so much sense, but also with such good humor. So glad I came across your channel, subscribed x love you!

[@eveedwards3080]

Thanks for teaching people about shitty PEOPLE bless them and say goodbye! Have been having a clean out lately and still going and am working on being a amazing friend and family member! Love your work:)

[@jonathanport1520]

I bet you lay awake at night thinking a lot. These things you talk about are so intricate and niche. I often think about all these things you talk about but have felt like for a long time that most people generally have no conception of any of this stuff. It get's quite lonely sometimes. Absolutely love you!

[@bridgetrobinson76]

Toxic family member, disrespected me, lied on me, spoke bad about me to people she shouldn't have. Done nothing but loved her, financially and spiritually. She has done this for so many years and yet still I forgive her. The Big Crunch came over a week ago, let's just say we will never speak again. She knocked my confidence every time, made decisions without consulting me, insulted me behind my back. Used and abused no more. She was my daughter, there is no going back.

[@8270361507]

My mom at times had talked bad about to our relatives and complains that we are never attached to anyone and blames western culture. Her own family can be toxic. I realized that if there is no mutual respect, do not expect any sort of "attachment". Your children or whoever can "detach" from you at any time if you possess toxic behaviors, no matter how attached you were when young.

[@mikescuderi4084]

bettyboo29 i have a vicious cycle cycle 1 : me and tata are good cycle 2; me and tata fighting

[@skyfinderlarmour5116]

I like how you start this video by saying, "hey think about different things affect/effect you and the 'Toxic' person". Makes me think more actively.

[@lkaur6970]

Thank you so much for saying this. I was going thru a very bad time in my life and the toxic people referred to me as a negative person. I never did any harm to them, I never even asked for their help. I only needed a ear to tell me story to and those toxic people spread bad things about me that I am negative. It wasn't negativity, it was anxiety disorder. Thank you for recognizing the difference between negative people and people who are anxious. I really just needed a human ear during that time and everyone ran away. Hope you're video helps people in recognizing the difference and help people who are going thru anxiety. Whoever is reading this, please know that anxious people are not negative. They are just going thru a really really hard time.

[@fispeheblu2429]

My depression and suicidal thoughts were a direct result of the shitstorm of toxic people in my life during the 4 year period I lost my mother and father to cancer. Once I cut everyone except those few sane people who could see my life for what it was a few months later my depression was gone and has been for a while. My old therapist wanted to put me on really strong medication because they as well could not see the problem in my life was the people I was allowing in my life directly hurting me over and over again. Now I spend most of my time alone and only have 3 friends I see on occasion. Isolating myself from the world until someone who actually treats me like a human being comes into it and not allowing anyone in saved my life. I'm happier than I've ever been without a social life almost at all. Most people are not worth it

[@essyalways]

"and all she wants to do is get drunk, f*** the pirates, and have meaningless conversations with the parrots...and shit is thicker than blood..." OMG, I love your analogies!

[@nurology]

+shana r HAHA!!! xoxo

[@remshjgh2245]

"You are the gatekeeper of your domain." I LOVE It. You're amazing

[@ChristinaLovesSushi]

Hi Nur, I have been watching your (beauty) videos since the beginning and appreciate you starting a new channel. Everything you have discussed really resonated with me. In my early twenties I would keep friends around because of "all the inside jokes we had" or "because I knew her since like age 19" and other BS standards. Now, in my thirties I have to balance being a wife and mother, and being a full-time professional, I simply do not have time for BS! I have really filtered the people I choose in my life. It feels incredibly refreshing to have only loving, supportive, and respectful people around me. Most importantly I have more energy focusing on tending to the relationships that truly matter and bring me joy. The best thing is I have noticed myself becoming a better person and exerting more positive energy out in to the world. My mantra has become "if you do not add value to my life, then I'd rather be without you." Thanks again, keep your videos coming:)

[@20maxilo]

I wish I had known this earlier in my life.. I used to think that I was the problem.. But now I realize that I only accepted the bad and poor behavior... I accepted all the bad things and I realized that I didnt fully love myself.. Now at 33 I made it my mission to leave people that are just not meant for me.. I just wished I could of learned this earlier

[@SidnacGlitz]

Ahhh awesome video I swear you have a way of breaking things down, it's a gift. This video came right on time. "I am the gatekeeper, access denied" aka bye Felicia 😂 thank you for this I really needed to hear it. 😘

[@brittneytrujillo1234]

This video kind of made me realize that I’m not necessarily the toxic person in other’s lives but I don’t feel that the people around me believe that it’s a privilege to have me in their life. I don’t think I am the best daughter, granddaughter, sister, cousin, friend... I don’t know if I just don’t realize my self-worth or if I’m not actually doing my best in my relationships.

[@crimsonskiss]

I need to watch this every week to remind myself. Especially as a highly sensitive person, or empath. Because of this, I have to be that much more selective than the average person to the people and things I allow into my life. So sick of settling with losers just so they can take advantage of my generosity and sensitivity.

[@leenaxx-ru2ym]

Erin Nelson i relate so much to this. my "friends" were people i knew for most of my life (i am in high school) and they are just awful for me to be around. one of them lied about liking me for like 7 years and faked a friendship with me, now that i know about it she completely ignores me and talks shit about me behind my back while i never did ANYTHING to her. she hates my "personality" because i'm not like her or my other so-called friends. i'm more sensitive, introverted and empathetic and just conscientious. naturally i always feel left out when i hang out with them but now that i have to live with the fact that i'm the one who's always left to care while they're doing horrible things and not giving a shit. i wish i could just wave a magic wand and make amazing friends and forget these people who are making my life so miserable.

[@leenaxx-ru2ym]

and the worst part is i can't draw boundaries. I am SO NAIVE that one of them needed me again as a friend and i came running like nothing ever happened. people know that i'm like this so they take advantage and only come to me when they need me.

[@AriaPringle9053]

@@leenaxx-ru2ym Time to revamp yourself and let them go.

[@twinklingrose3535]

Nur your videos have changed my life and you're admirable--you are confident in yourself, don't do bullshit, and don't coddle your audience--you give us empowerment tools, remind us to be self aware, and treat us seriously as adults who are fucking responsible for their choices and their lives and their learning. I am on a journey towards moving forward from what I've been holding onto from the past and towards being braver instead of waiting for the easy way out. Life is hard and you both simplify it for me, give us inspiration and you don't make it any less hard for our sake, but clearer to navigate through. You have lent us your experience, your optimism and your growth through other people. But you also have said things in your videos that I took too personally and felt attacked by. I realize it was necessary to face the harsh, unpalatable truth. Your work is unique to me because I've never had a range of reactions and analysis to other people's advice videos. Thank you so much.

[@BlackThorndRose]

Can you please do a video on how to create healthy boundaries, in general, but if you can also touch on family as that seems to be a fine line to me. I wouldn't say that my family is toxic in any way, however, like yours, they are also immigrants to this country and are very much set in their ways. They "don't understand this culture" for lack of better words. This was a great video, thank you so much for your advise, it really, really helps put things in perspective and I look forward to hearing more!

[@Pri.G]

Thank you soo much for mentioning the difference between toxic people and those with mental health issues. Anxiety/depression can sometimes make one seem like a negative energy to be around but its a cry for help. If anything, they feel worse about themselves. Really appreciate this video

[@sun.sh.in.e]

What do I do if my parents are the ones who are extremely selfish and toxic? Is it understandable to get the hell away from them as soon as possible and never look back? I'm a junior in high school and my parent's behaviors and the things they say are taking a negative toll on my mental health. I honestly want to go to college and never look back.

[@island661]

Jasmine Jackson Been there. I broke up with both my parents. I'm a lot older than you but I had to let them go. It's a hard decision to make but if they're truly unhealthy for you, you have to think about yourself first. I felt that I wasn't gaining anything by having mine in my life. Only heartache and agony. I highly recommend taking the trash out, even if it's your own parents. I'm sorry you have to go through this.

[@betinixdraws4302]

theres a subreddit called raisedbynarcissists. I had many things my mom did to me that "doesn't seem right" and that forum has been extremely supportive when it comes to clarify my mind about emotional child abuse. A very validating place full of helpful people. Hang around there and see if you can relate to those stories.

[@LoriWattnz]

Jasmine Jackson sadly I have had that problem with my siblings and parents my dad was toxic waste until he had a stroke and things change but my siblings rejected me I had to accept that they don't want a relationship with me you find people that accept you love you and treat you like family.

[@maloryvictoria9561]

I agree with everyone elses advice, but I just wanted to add that sometimes cutting family out doesn't have to be permanent, so don't be scared to do it. Maybe it'll only be 6 months or a year, or maybe a few, and you can come back with a more peaceful mindset after having time away from them and see if anything has changed. Or maybe it'll be permanent, but all relationship should be conditional because without conditions we make it an option to accept abuse.

[@dm-dy4ie]

I understand Denisa - bless your heart girl/xo,

[@jakiepoopoo2010]

I now send most to all my friends your videos if they struggle with similar issues. All your videos help me and other people I send them too. It's frightening but also refreshing to give up excuses for letting toxic people stay in your life. I know look at my excuses, view the truth, and rid those that are toxic but also to forgive them. I'm sure at some point in my life, I was toxic as well. Making excuses for every toxic person and for yourself is draining now it's time to love yourself more so you can attact true love (either being partner, friendship, or just human being love)

[@rustybobbbypins]

'their boss is shitting in grandma's vintage vase' hahahahahahah i canttttt

[@rustybobbbypins]

+Glitter Overkill 10:23

[@nurology]

+Glitter Overkill HAHAHA. I'm ridiculous.

[@marylyndeodate208]

This video literally made my day. I have been dealing with depression for quite some time due to a toxic relationship, which I'm out of now and toxic colleagues. I have come to stage in my life where all they say doesn't matter to me. But today out of nowhere, maybe it was pms, all of that dawned onto me again and it had been a very sulky day. Watching this video at 3 am literally lifted up my mood and made me stronger in my belief in not giving a shit about toxic people. Thank you! Love you! 💓💕💞

[@diana.niklassik]

Just wanted to say THANK YOU for these kind of Videos. :)

[@nurology]

+Diana You're most welcome!!! 💙

[@supamundane]

Also, 100% agree with cutting off family when they are toxic to your life. Too many friends don't get this. Love your energy, great video!

[@thebeautybenz]

I'm going to look deeper into difference between people who are just toxic and those who have mental health problems. My mother was both toxic and had mental health issues but she couldn't even recognize that she her actions and words were negative and would use her past to justify them. After years of dealing with her BS I find myself making excuses for every toxic person in my life, figuring that they're negative because of their past or mental health issues. Even when first watching this I thought "well most negative people are negative because their past". I feel like what stands out aside from mental health issues is who's willing and eager to change.

[@joysogorgeous]

You definitely just changed my life for the better! Thank you! My Shitnado is coming to an end and I am not allowing shitty people in my party anymore. Thank you! And you can change the world. Stay encouraged and God bless you.

[@sensoryexperience]

The analogy you used is so good, so helpful, as a way to actually see what negative ppl do to your life/ your reality. Made me see things much clearer. Thank you..!

[@jakiepoopoo2010]

This video and other videos has truly helped me with toxic relationships. Now, I still cant tell cause I'm still struggling with co-dependence and I'm really trusting. However, if I begin to see someone that is becoming toxic and mostly they choose to leave my life than I don't get upset or super over sensitive about it. I have learned to move on quickly and find better friends who want reciprocity relationships! Thank you so much! ❤❤❤

[@varsha4294]

Omg....this was inspiring. I've been going through a lot of self conscious shit lately because of the people around me who are constantly trying to make me feel aware of my insecurities. I discussed this my with my mom, she was supportive and tried to boost me with confidence and asked me to avoid such people, but I didn't know. I am glad i bumped into your channel and this made me feel nice. This is going to be tuff but I'll try my best.

[@varsha4294]

Guess what? I went out today and shopped all alone for the very first time. It felt good. Thanks a lotttt!

[@nurology]

You're most welcome!! xo

[@MargoMartin1]

I just stumbled onto this video.......WOW..... you are way wise beyond your years! Very well spoken dear one!!!! You blessed me today.....I have cleaned up and kicked out the toxic peeps from my party. I'm now on a mission to find my tribe.

[@tali468]

I needed this so much. Thank you for being on KZbin!!! And sharing your wise self. Seriously get your own show lol

[@wiemcowybieram]

All my life I was surrounded by toxic people. Unfortunately, I didn't know how to deal with them or maybe I didn't see what was going on. At the moment, I'm conscious and I'm so happy about it. Actually, I'm grateful that I met these people because they made me stronger. Thank you for your video, you are a smart person :) Regards from Poland :)

[@MommaDuck7]

Oh man, but how do you close a friendship you've outgrown? Create enough distance & they'll ask what's going on. What do you say? And how do end a relationship with family?! 🤯

[@Wikitolija]

I love this video! I do actually have this problem with men who are really, really toxic. Even though I've always believed in me and in my capacity, at some point in my life I've let someone take that away from me and make me extremely vulnerable. In the past 7 years I feel like I've lost myself, 'cause I've been trying to be someone else to people who were important to me (obviously I wasn't to them). Every single one of them was a toxic person in a different way and they all have been shi**ing on my party in different ways. Every single one of these took a big part from me away as I was in a relationship with them and after they left. And I've been watching this video every time after my relationships were over. I'm a bit ashamed to write this, 'cause it sounds like as if I didn't learn anything from this video, but I'm glad that it's still here, because it reminds me every time of some things that I've forgotten as I was spending time with and giving love, care and energy to my toxic boyfriends. I usually don't comment, but I took my time now to say thank you for this video. Thumbs up :)

[@FriedEggSarnie]

Haha, I love your analogy. Thinking of life this way seems like a great tool. I'm gonna try it out.

[@catherinewylie6959]

Thank you for the explanation about time. I just ended a ten-year friendship with a mostly self-absorbed person who always canceled plans on me. She didn't like me saying enough was enough and tried to turn tables. I told her to go find someone else to put up with this. I noticed that when I started getting rid of pepole I didn't feel comfortable around for whatever reason and got rid of toxic men I was dating, that I started really trusting my gut and deciding a lot of people and their shit is just not worth the stress and aggravation. Granted, this person had some good things, but I never liked her self-centered character.. Also quit spending time around pot-head friends who lack self-awareness and compassion towards what is going on in my life - and people who are always hitting me up to do something for them.

[@chloeawhite9400]

You've literally changed my life like all your advice videos they're just so helpful. Love you so much 💗

[@TXO74]

Reciprocity! Took me a while to learn that as opposed to just giving all the time. Love your vids, thank you!! :)

[@danaa]

Thank you so much for this video! I really wish I had seen this video a couple of years earlier, at least that way I could have understood this and refrained from giving out invites left and right to hopefully avoid the people who have treated me, dare I say it, like shit. The toxic people in my life have been my class and the things you mentioned at 1:50 is what I experienced from my classmates the past 3 years. They just hid it so well that I only started realizing all of this in the past year where it started showing in their behavior with less of a filter than before - and when I look back, signs of their toxic behavior were sprinkled all over the place, I just missed them because I took them in differently. That is not to say that I am completely innocent cause I can admit that I don't always act in the best way possible, no one does and I can only work on myself to improve. I just wish I hadn't spent so much time being a people-pleaser and a pushover cause the people we are trying to please don't actually give a crap about us - what I've realized is, if they take advantage of the things you have to offer - whether it's encouragement, support, materialistic things or whatever, anything goes, they really don't care about YOU. A person who truly cares about YOU would try to bring it to your attention or return the favor and not simply treat you with disrespect until the next time they need something from you..

[@ashleyphillips9126]

Thank you for deciphering the difference in a toxic relationship and mental issues. No one else that Iv watched did that and thats so so so important. :) Good work.

[@Rose61234]

Loved the analogy! Loveeee your advice videos! Im so happy you're doing videos ☺️❤️

[@justhereforagoodtime88]

Im a new subscriber, girl you totally nailed it on SO many points. I really like that you brought up the truth about friendships. It seems like so many people, girls especially, use their number of girlfriends and how long they've known them as status symbols. Im an air force brat. We moved around constantly and after parents divorced, i moved around even more, at least once a year. Been to 8 different schools including three high schools. Ive never had a BFF but i do have friends. It can be frustrating when making new friends that those same people have their close inner circle and BFF and it can kinda make you feel like the fifth wheel. But at the same time it can be a strength, because it has taught to be more self reliant and to be truly open hearted to people who are lonely and in the same predicament i am in. Glad i found your channel and keep up the good work!

[@infinite-quadz]

this is legit everything that i needed to hear. you are such goalssss! a huge inspiration and btw your skin is so fucking flawless lmao

[@jonathanport1520]

I love how you recognise the difference between straight up toxic people and people that are toxic because they are going through mental difficulties. Respect!

[@indiehipstervibe]

I had loads of toxic people in my life earlier this year like from January to May of this year. They literally bullied me since 2014. Anyways I’ve changed schools and in May I blocked all of them on my social media so they can’t contact me in any way shape or form and so that they can’t stalk me either. They’ve been completely cut out of my life and life is so good now. But I’m worried, they’re out of my life now but I want them to be out of my life forever. Like I don’t want to see them in university. I never want them back in my life they’re so horrible and toxic and they don’t understand the words leave me alone.

[@shaunyakovlev1076]

Negative people. I'm having a negative part of my life and I want it to leave and go back to my happy self. I like that you know the difference

[@TheWhizzle389]

Damnnnnn Nur! Back at it again with the life gems!

[@nurology]

+TheWhizzle389 Whitney!!!! Haha, I 💙 you!! Hope all is well!

[@montsergirl]

Damn girl you are so well spoken, I trip on my words so badly just trying to think let alone explaining things. Very very perfectly Said! Thank you for this! Life is so hard but toxic will make it so so miserable. Pleeeeeease never stop sharing your wisdom!

[@angelicamedina7606]

I'm bipolar i have lots of up and down and I need a great person in my life I have never had a normal loving person that's wants to see me well or happy 😭 I never get compliments from people around me not even family they always have something negative to say 🤦‍♂️ Or hugs I feel like I'll be a better person if I was loved if anyone would care about me

[@lamdaf8860]

Hope you are well and happy💪🏼😊

[@Clary_Sage]

This video came up on my feed in 2021. This should have more views. Your party analogy is fire; I I’ll always remember it. Wish I’d seen this years ago. Now I continue to the end of the video. Great work!

[@humanii9037]

Hi I just made a short video about toxic people its a bit different but if it catches your mind I would appreciate the support❤ Its the most recent one just a really small youtuber.

[@androkay2080]

Can I say you have inspired me . I came across your Channel by accident and now I am addicted . You need to write a book and your blogs are amazing 😘

[@nurology]

Thank you so much love!!!

[@cagweyu]

4 years later and this is still GOLD!!

[@melissapuerta8327]

You're amazing ! Thank you.

[@nurology]

Thank YOU!

[@nataliewu5231]

I think you are the MOST helpful person on this whole KZbin up to now. It's not about what you are talking but how you make me feel better in ACTUAL life

[@peekay9310]

You need your own tv show or something

[@Alexis-ec9cl]

Pee Kay talk show

[@CHARELLESNO]

I really love you for this video. I really appreciate you. The hardest part in healing is learning what coping is and to move forward because feeling lost with BETRAYL is stI'll to me the worst thing in the WORLD I would take death any day over that feeling. There is terrible people out there... I have so much empathy I live my life with compassion and I love to help other people but I'm just extremely devastated and I just lost everything because of the trail and Trust and I can't put the blame on anybody else but myself I own it is nobody else's fault but my own but I trusted their word and see me in it state of panic and they use it to their advantage I'm almost worried about myself I'm so and this is like the last I can even feel at this not even feeling I feel numb. and the part that's really upsetting is their calling me and they're talking to me about themselves and they want to act like I'm the one that caused the problem and I'm the one that did that and I'm the one the maid that happened. So they're taking you accountability for their actions and they're blaming me will I am in a state of no understanding and it's really hard because it's a lot it's not just one thing it's a lot of things. those negative people are so worried about how they feel and what they think and I don't care I accept them for who they are but I lost because of them my dog is sick everything is just gone I'm just hurting really bad it's actual Terror and devastation. It's really sad and I try so hard to focus my energy on other things or even try to cope with what's going on but I can barely do that because once I start feeling the pain I just can't take it anymore. but I do have those great people in my life I have amazing friends but I'm shutting them down to because I can't cope with how I feel and I don't want to make it anybody else's problem. I don't know what to do anymore :( but I always do my best! I don't regret my hard work because my work is driven with LOVE passion and a goal to get to some kind of dream at this point.

[@bradmcewen]

Damn you've given me break throughs. Damn ! Nobody's gonna shit on my party anymore! Damn !!!!

[@junjunlu4318]

Brad McEwen poor thing

[@fariharashid7585]

This is definitely a helpful analogy. I've been struggling with a toxic relationship that I can't get out of lately. It is really taking a toll on who I am at this point.

[@jessiefox3739]

Wow I have never thought about the issue in that way. I have a sister who I totally think is delusional. She has been popping ecstasy for a long time and I know what she calls vitamins, really is because I had gotten a mini book on drug abuse from the Middlesex County Fair and my sister's vitamins looked exactly like the picture of the pills in the book. So anyways, she has been taking out 50,000 dollar loans every month and all of that money is totally gone in less than a week. Because she is such a princess and has such an entitlement of grandiosity, she truly believes that she doesn't have to pay a penny of those loans back. Meanwhile with all that money she has obtained she has nothing to show for it and she is often seen with items that she has fished out of dumpsters. My question is, if I know this is going on should I say something despite the fact that no body will listen to me because my sister is the super skinny golden girl and I'm the fat pig whose 5 foot 6 and 150 pounds?

[@silviemajorenkova7918]

Juuuust WOOOW. I just discovered you tonight on KZbin...exactly what I needed to hear. Are you even for real? Girl, you're a legend or soon to become one! Just love you. Thank you! ♡♡♡♡♡

[@TheTdelte]

this is the best video ever I just love the way you explained it perfect . shitnado.

[@arianarodriguez2227]

I want to say thank you for all the advice and positivity you spread through your videos. Because of your original toxic relationships video, I found the courage to kick so many toxic people, which were the majority of my friends at the time, out of life. I watch this video now still working on myself and my relationships with others, but ultimately much happier. I couldn't thank you enough for being such a positive influence on my life! Much love ❤️ ❤️ ❤️