Alternative punchline for the dog & scrabble tiles: Vet took x-rays and said his next bowel movement could spell disaster.
@adammaccallum92452 жыл бұрын
Or his next vowel movement....I'll see my self out, good day sir.
@robvlob2 жыл бұрын
I like that punchline better.
@nicdavis12022 жыл бұрын
But, you only get 7 letters. Dog’s been cheating.
@robvlob2 жыл бұрын
@@nicdavis1202 I bet he feels regret somewhere in there.
@PAKallman2 жыл бұрын
@@nicdavis1202 ate a whole bag is the set up
@prayerforceone Жыл бұрын
True story: it’s actually illegal to eat Scrabble tiles. Repeat offenders could end up with a long sentence.
@jamesmcinnis208 Жыл бұрын
"actually"
@livywithane Жыл бұрын
😭
@lowresmember2880 Жыл бұрын
Damn bro,this one good 😂
@bigolomofe415 Жыл бұрын
Yo...😂
@mckenziethorburn3587 Жыл бұрын
Took me far too long to realise
@victherocker2 жыл бұрын
The dad who memorized the root of 666 deserves a prize
@morganh28002 жыл бұрын
I had to watch it again just so i could stop it and write it down. Lol
@sunstruckfarms44892 жыл бұрын
@@morganh2800 same
@Pichus082 жыл бұрын
Quickly checked... deamn, it is really root of evil! 😅
@gregholl50112 жыл бұрын
which root? there's square root, cube root etcetera.
@jessekitchens33642 жыл бұрын
I'm not too unsure that couldn't have been on the inside of those ridiculous glasses 😂 but still savage
@burzum8312 Жыл бұрын
I was crying at a local bar yesterday. The bartender asked me what's the matter. I told him my wife said she's not gona talk to me for a month. Bartender said that's not so bad. I said, it is. Today's the end of the month.
@bestboss5 Жыл бұрын
😂😂😂.. permission to plagiarize🙏🙏
@burzum8312 Жыл бұрын
@@bestboss5 Lol none needed
@Zin_Zum Жыл бұрын
😂😂
@outsidlookingconcerned Жыл бұрын
😂😂😂😂😂😂
@Happy-American Жыл бұрын
Just get a divorce 😂
@PhantomFilmAustralia2 жыл бұрын
The delivery on the "Thanks for nothing" line was executed to perfection.
@damnedtolive91212 жыл бұрын
10/10 ran immediately to the comments section
@johngregory92532 жыл бұрын
😂
@TheAnnoyingBoss2 жыл бұрын
Fun fact, the root of all evil is actually the love of money. The money isn't evil, the love of the money is the root of the evil.
@albertweikel90322 жыл бұрын
that line killed me!....🤣
@badcornflakes63742 жыл бұрын
That's your dad after a hard day's work drinking a beer in the garage
@revan1lord2 жыл бұрын
I was at my wife's friend's funeral. I asked if I could say a word, she said sure. "Plethora", I said. she responded, "thanks, that means a lot"
@T-1001 Жыл бұрын
Underrated
@revan1lord Жыл бұрын
@@T-1001 many thanks
@AmokBR Жыл бұрын
Lol, took me a while to get it
@surajk1036 Жыл бұрын
@@AmokBRI didn't get it
@AmokBR Жыл бұрын
@@surajk1036 “Plethora” means “many” or “a lot”, hence the wife’s response.
@ellisonhamilton33222 жыл бұрын
I got fired from my quality control job at the M & M factory. I kept rejecting all the Ws.
@Doughnutcat52 жыл бұрын
Lol
@melindamagyar34212 жыл бұрын
🤣
@bluzter2 жыл бұрын
That took me a sec 🤣🤣
@kiltedrambler2 жыл бұрын
That's a blonde joke.... 😐
@mariebelladonna4372 жыл бұрын
@@kiltedramblerI've always heard it as a your mom joke, lol.
@DaGreenMarshmello Жыл бұрын
“I don’t want to interrupt her” 🤣🤣holy fuck
@RedEyedJedi Жыл бұрын
That was the best joke out of the lot of them because it's true 😂
@99Yeti Жыл бұрын
I don’t understand it
@KoarTCN Жыл бұрын
@@99Yeticuz women never stop talking.
@stevebengel1346 Жыл бұрын
@@99Yetiit means that his wife never stops talking
@benr979 Жыл бұрын
This was an old Rodney Dangerfield line back in the day! Classic
@joegilly15232 жыл бұрын
Only 7 years of not interrupting,that's a good start.
@SweatyFatGuy2 жыл бұрын
its been 21 years since I interrupted my wife, it was easy after I lost 150 ugly pounds.
@TheBulbasaurKid2 жыл бұрын
I don't get that one, can you explain?
@GuzzlingDuck2 жыл бұрын
I probably woulda laughed if he just didn't finish that joke, lmao
@AS_2102 жыл бұрын
@@TheBulbasaurKidshe's been talking non-stop for 7 years
@bonzopippinpaddleopsicopolis2 жыл бұрын
@@AS_210 ohh lmao
@Sujad2 жыл бұрын
Steak puns are a rare medium well done.
@TheVoxbox13 Жыл бұрын
LoL. This comment is WAY underrated.
@LuxeprivaeMedia Жыл бұрын
😂
@andrewstephens8790 Жыл бұрын
beautiful simplicity
@CarmenCastille11 ай бұрын
Im picking up what putting down on the grill 🥩
@jonathanmol44896 ай бұрын
I haven't heard a raw comment like that since tartare. 🥩
@jjhbball2 жыл бұрын
These are high quality dad jokes
@dewimatthews Жыл бұрын
A butcher put some ribeye up on a shelf saying he’d give them to whoever guessed their weight. No one took the challenge....they thought the steaks were too high.
@nicdavis12022 жыл бұрын
Could have kept his job at the bank if he’d apologized…. Guess he lost interest. Or needed some change.
@pushups4thepain2 жыл бұрын
good one
@rufushughes4331 Жыл бұрын
He was vaulted out on whose account, though? Is the family checking?
@rufushughes4331 Жыл бұрын
He was vaulted out on whose account, though? Is the family checking?
@artistale4586 Жыл бұрын
I doubt they’d fund it and just stock you with the bill
@Influential1blis Жыл бұрын
Lemme give you my 2 cents
@flatsixx2 жыл бұрын
This video does an excellent job of capturing how dead inside us married dad types are.
@TJay412 ай бұрын
Yeah, but the fact that you still have a sense of humor says a lot about you, hat off to you
@Dilshad-gu7je2 жыл бұрын
Watching these is like when you really hurt yourself and laugh, despite the pain.
@UnbyHoundredTwenty2 жыл бұрын
Can't relate, I'm not stupid
@ereHeuqibmazoM2 жыл бұрын
I was laughing instead of crying like I thought I would when I wr clef my last cbr. Couldn’t move my legs but was chuckling at how fkin stupid this all is as gonna get once the paramedics arrived.
@gabler79922 жыл бұрын
you laugh at pain so it goeas away embarrassed
@loneshadow08442 жыл бұрын
Felt the same way falling into a pile of Russian Olives. Got stabbed by a lot of them and just laughed as I laid there in slight pain
@prastoworiyan47012 жыл бұрын
@@ereHeuqibmazoM
@grandadmiralsuntzu50662 жыл бұрын
My dude just memorized the root of all evil
@kyoooo2 жыл бұрын
Dude got 7/11 trucker hat and visor on, he livin the life
@davidwalker2057 Жыл бұрын
I watched this like 30 times!!! These guys are awesome!! the root of all evil!!!... No word yet!!! I don't wanna interrupt her... the straight faces!! thanks for nothin....
@aboxthatdr0x0ls2 жыл бұрын
"To the guy who invented the number zero. Thanks for nothing." That Indian guy: 👁️👄👁️
@lakshacc59542 жыл бұрын
Lmao
@vanfad1286 Жыл бұрын
Nice
@adityaaggarwal7481 Жыл бұрын
@@ashvindkumar5471 it was aryabhatt actually.
@pruthvikchaudhari9977 Жыл бұрын
@@adityaaggarwal7481 why the word actually in your reply. It makes it sound like Aryabhatta was not Indian 😅😅😅
@adityaaggarwal7481 Жыл бұрын
@@pruthvikchaudhari9977 the person whom I replied said it was ramanujan who invented zero
@P_Rizzo2 жыл бұрын
All hail the Fraternal Association of Really Talented Enthusiastic Dads 😂
@finderlifebound Жыл бұрын
FARTED?
@tq3076 Жыл бұрын
😂😂😂😂😂
@subduedblonde731 Жыл бұрын
Just a buncha dudes, FARTED.
@soullessangel2072 жыл бұрын
THE STRAIGHT FACES 😂😂 their delivery and reactions 😂
@bigolomofe415 Жыл бұрын
That's what does it for me 😂
@bigolomofe415 Жыл бұрын
Esp the pause then nod after " we all make miss steaks" 😂
@ChiChi-tn2kc2 жыл бұрын
The root of all evil got me. 😂
@frolfenuugen4lyfe2 жыл бұрын
My fav was the guy that doesn't wanna interrupt his wife. 🤣
@billolsen43602 жыл бұрын
Cop pulls over an old man who's driving a convertible. Cop says, "Sir, when you hit that bump a couple blocks back, your wife was thrown out of the car." Old man replies, "THANK you, Officer. I thought I'd gone deaf."
@roidblitzed Жыл бұрын
I didnt understand that one
@TheOne-pn2cy Жыл бұрын
@@roidblitzedcuz his wife never stops talking
@roidblitzed Жыл бұрын
@@billolsen4360 good one 😂
@roidblitzed Жыл бұрын
@@TheOne-pn2cy thank you it makes sense now 😂
@kathleen2754 Жыл бұрын
The fact that y'all can just sit there and not bust out laughing I will never know how. I almost lost it on the first and second jokes 😂😂😂
@JimHassey2 жыл бұрын
"Haven't talked to my wife in 7 years..." Great one !!....
@mttkenzn513102 жыл бұрын
these aren't even considered as jokes to them, this is just the universal language of all dads in the world
@_-_TheShadow_-_2 жыл бұрын
"So I pushed her!" Not gonna lie I just realized I'm pretty dumb, took me a good while to get that one😂😂
@brianschuetz26142 жыл бұрын
I can be a little slow sometimes, myself.
@noman1012 жыл бұрын
I still didn't get it
@_-_TheShadow_-_2 жыл бұрын
@@noman101 her physical balance, to see if she would fall over when he pushed her 😅
@MyWillBeDone Жыл бұрын
@EagleStryker1 yea man... it's like something just trips
@arnold2011 Жыл бұрын
If you don’t know English that well, Dad jokes are really hard to understand.
@ronaldhill71802 жыл бұрын
Thanks, I needed this today.....God Bless
@Afif.anNayem.asSalafi2 жыл бұрын
I could listen to this all day.
@kamrans2887 Жыл бұрын
😂😂😂 My family always sarcasticlly laugh at my dad jokes but I enjoy them myself 😅
@gordyhernandez92032 жыл бұрын
Kids asked about marriage joke was so funny, the duck in the distance started quacking up🤣🤣🤣
@VNeto942 жыл бұрын
Duck really went "ha!"
@renderproductions10322 жыл бұрын
Too much quackery
@joshgilbert32392 жыл бұрын
That one is gold
@snowboardslider242 жыл бұрын
that'll never fly...
@yahdood6015 Жыл бұрын
It’s a known fact that to conceal laughter, the local dad will take a sip from his morning brew
@daqurisicola96652 жыл бұрын
The dude in the 7 Eleven hat Omg. His glasses. 🤣🤣🤣
@20thcenturygamer222 жыл бұрын
I'd like a set, anyone know where I could get one?
@Amigo211892 жыл бұрын
Hands down the funniest thing in the clip.
@zirconblue22 жыл бұрын
@@20thcenturygamer22 try searching JackJad mask
@rebeccaherrera60062 жыл бұрын
@@20thcenturygamer22 make sure you use key words -full shade. It came up as “jackjad fashion oversized mask shape shield style sunglasses”
@ShadowFoxSF2 жыл бұрын
I was too distracted by those shades for 2 or 3 runs through I didn't even see the hat
@v3ngence1382 жыл бұрын
Broo, I was holding it at first, but I genuinely can't hold it in anymore watching it a second time. I'm burst to laughter every single time 🤣
@ck1abe5152 жыл бұрын
🤣 the 1st joke had me rolling 🤣, I'm gonna go out on a limb here, and say that the woman had zero balance 🤣🤷♂️🤣
@Pranav_Bhamidipati2 жыл бұрын
Well, then she should be the one to have gone out on a limb 😉
@handleisntfkinavailable2 жыл бұрын
i see what u did there
@mr.nobody96972 жыл бұрын
Dont know why but the "to the guy that invented 0, thanks for nothing" cracked me up. I think it was the delivery that got me.
@CautiousDad2 жыл бұрын
Ngl as a dad I do appreciate a good dad joke, it's what I do most of the time 🥰
@thegamingpuff37442 жыл бұрын
The root of evil being 25.807 is f***ing amazing 😂
@josephhunt79202 жыл бұрын
Hahaha! I memorized the square root of 666 back in 1993 and I can still blab it out on command! Thank you Ti-83
@claude199x2 жыл бұрын
Best scientific calculator I have ever had.
@troybaxter2 жыл бұрын
TI-84 Plus is superior, but TI-83 is still quality.
@claude199x2 жыл бұрын
@@troybaxter oh no you didn't...
@Killa_cam72 жыл бұрын
I got all these jokes but that one please explain it. I swear I should understand it but sadly I’m not witted enough to.
@GiGi12172 жыл бұрын
These guys are too much. Love it! As you swiftly move calmly to water beneath you. No Word Yet, Don't want to interrupt her. ALL great ones. Look 4ward to more of these!!
@michelleadamchak13302 жыл бұрын
Ah, Dock Tok dad jokes. What a perfect way to start a nice, relaxing, easy Sunday. Heartfelt thanks for your creative genius!!
@aisforapple24944 ай бұрын
The last one is the best! 🤣
@therealbeedubbs352 жыл бұрын
The son asking what it’s like to be married joke! 🤣 straight laughed so hard 👏👏👏👏
@gordyhernandez92032 жыл бұрын
That was so funny even the duck in the distance was quacking up🤣
@Supong232 жыл бұрын
I didn't understand that
@flashahhasavedeveryoneofus28242 жыл бұрын
Why u ignoring me
@mchammer50262 жыл бұрын
@@Supong23 because it's a boomer joke
@mrhefe23222 жыл бұрын
@@mchammer5026 how is it a boomer joke?
@claudiahall5237 Жыл бұрын
Ok.. this is so dumb it's brilliant!! Thank u!! 😂😂
@lemdisco45752 жыл бұрын
Pure, %100, Gold.
@The-Rest-of-Us Жыл бұрын
The 2 jokes that weren’t just puns were actually the funniest. 😄
@wandarobinson5612 Жыл бұрын
Love the PUNS! Play On Words….LOVE IT!!!
@quintopia2 жыл бұрын
you got me with the balancing the mug on your hand
@esmeraldablack236510 ай бұрын
Love the first 3 (check balance, dog swallowed scrabble & did not want to interrupt wife ) and the zero joke. 😂😂😂
@ogenevieve2 жыл бұрын
My 93-year-old, Korean war vet dad, who just got out of the hospital today called me and said: "This woman went into a tattoo shop that had a sign up that read ' free tattoos for women if you show us your boobs.'" I didn't know how to respond, but before I could ask him what the joke was he said, "the name of the shop was 'Tit for Tat.'" He's got a million of them!
@rorybattersby5636 Жыл бұрын
wow guys you need to get a life
@travo1228 Жыл бұрын
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
@Hashiriya985 Жыл бұрын
I was not prepared for that one
@deidrataylor1360 Жыл бұрын
That was a good one 😂
@ogenevieve Жыл бұрын
To everyone who took the time to tap the 👍, I want to say thank you so much bcuz when I told him that I wrote this and that 395 ppl liked it, I don't have the words to describe how much that meant to him. He's also lost his sight in the last couple of years, so he can't read it himself, so again I thank each one of you.
@adel8632 Жыл бұрын
I love these guys! I in a world of seriousness and corruption and evil, this is amazingly refreshing.
@ronaldwilliams96002 жыл бұрын
Okay… the “no word yet” got me good.
@alicejeans7185 Жыл бұрын
Here’s one:My wife told me I should stop singing I’m a believer or she would leave me I thought she was joking but then I saw her face😂😂😂😂😂😂
@thebigcheese_69972 жыл бұрын
Bro that last one had me flying halfway across Panama 💀
@iaminlovewithyou.2 жыл бұрын
I want a video of that
@akazy79062 жыл бұрын
Satire after pun after pun, INCREDIBLE JOKES
@zacharymartin1876 Жыл бұрын
Saw a one legged man at the ATM, he was checking his balance.
@torbjornlekberg7756 Жыл бұрын
That last one was great!
@habbadabbado57652 жыл бұрын
All day long, these jokes can fall like pearls of wisdom from their mouths
@CoreniaBug4 ай бұрын
Dad jokes 😂 I hope my dad jokes live up to theirs 😊
@aebalc2 жыл бұрын
This is why the internet exists.
@noneyabusiness9441 Жыл бұрын
I want to thank you gentlemen, I used one of your jokes at the Cancer Center Thursday about the shark attack. Lol I had everyone laughing, so thank you very much. Laughter is the best medicine.❤❤❤❤
@DadMakesJokes Жыл бұрын
I haven't talked to my wife in 7 years because I didn't want to interrupt her 😂😂😂
@lantosrevial88462 жыл бұрын
Simply lovely.
@steveroberts728 Жыл бұрын
Only seven years ? I’ve been married for twenty four years and I’m still waiting for a chance to say anything.
@MsMars.2 жыл бұрын
Some of these are actually Funny and clever.
@reeseross95042 жыл бұрын
The first one gets me 😂 yeah I'll check your balance push, your balance is off 😂🤣.
@hughphil Жыл бұрын
I'm a French woman, and don't understand that bank balance check joke; please explain it to me.
@LuckSpinner11 ай бұрын
Their Ray Dunn cups got me rollin'!!! 😁🤣☕️
@warrenb9343 Жыл бұрын
Love these! Keep 'em coming. I've heard the "didn't want to interrupt her..." one many times. It still gets me!
@teyvang3953 Жыл бұрын
All jokes gave me a good chuckle... good job guys.
@KrisMcCauley2 жыл бұрын
I would like longer pauses maybe a sip on the coffee. Could be super relaxing just having two buds down by the lake horsin
@mytrigger56132 жыл бұрын
Just slow it down a notch.
@ITseNano_YT Жыл бұрын
"Thanks for nothing "😂😂😂. Actually super funny dad joke
@stinkytoy2 жыл бұрын
Ive honestly never heard a single one of these before. All solid. Now subscribed 👍🏻
@Sindollx666x Жыл бұрын
Yup got me too
@wesleywashington12512 жыл бұрын
These jokes are actually pretty good!! lol
@JohnTurner3132 жыл бұрын
"So I pushed her" and "I don't want to interrupt her" 😂
@fritzmiller9792 Жыл бұрын
Haha, I actually didn't get the dog scrabble tile joke until the second time through. Great Dad Jokes !
@ericestes35672 жыл бұрын
The root of all evil joke is genius
@greatgeraldseverythingthri52082 жыл бұрын
Swears man
@tashinaking3198 Жыл бұрын
These are great dad jokes! 😂😂😂
@firewaterbydesign2 жыл бұрын
A few of these were pretty good!! My favorite was the dog 🐕 eating the tiles and the sqare root of evil!! An honorable mention to being married!!
@Drsteezymcgee2 жыл бұрын
Yup I'm getting old.. the last one made me burst out in laughter 🤣
@ironmanthunder1002 жыл бұрын
These top their dad jokes yo!
@xbmarc2 жыл бұрын
This is the best set yet! Keep it up guys!
@ninh05 Жыл бұрын
Havent’t talked to my wife for 7 years… This is not a joke, it’s wisdom for a happy life.
@md7761 Жыл бұрын
It's hilariously funny for no reason. 😂
@zorro83752 жыл бұрын
Had this on repeat for an hour
@Sindollx666x Жыл бұрын
To commit to memory? Good call.
@gv1lle2 жыл бұрын
Absolute Kings. Subscribed with notifications!
@deweyoxburger54702 жыл бұрын
"what do you do when you have an elephant with 3 balls? You walk him and pitch to the rhino"
@winston-churchill Жыл бұрын
Nice one! 🤣
@prayerforceone6 ай бұрын
@@deweyoxburger5470 Took me a minute😂
@michaeltreacy7881 Жыл бұрын
🤣🤣🤣🤣 Total draw every last one of them was awesome
@Akumansion2 жыл бұрын
the dude in the last looked genuinely impressed.
@pattiDrn12 жыл бұрын
Hilarious, perfect delivery!
@DebbieMiller-l8z Жыл бұрын
You guys make me laugh out loud! Tanks
@Auvas_Damask2 жыл бұрын
Doesn't anyone else realize how long it must have taken them to get those shorts considering they've been growing new beards all the time?
@sbahrin73mahmod2 жыл бұрын
Omg...😆😆😆
@meehow36942 жыл бұрын
We need more please. This was perfection.
@beboysub Жыл бұрын
bro these are the best dad jokes 😂
@EarlGrey-YT2 жыл бұрын
I just really need to get one of those visors.
@docv732 жыл бұрын
Those sunglasses under a 7 eleven hat is f$#$ng HILARIOUS!!!! 😆😅🤣😂🤣😅😆
@TJ_9182 жыл бұрын
Sheesh, they’ve got legs for days.
@Cant_stop_thinking2 жыл бұрын
😅🤣😂😆😄😃🙃🙂 I love these. Some are 'groaners' But I got a real chuckle.
@Arthur._Morgan2 жыл бұрын
my girlfriend was upset recently because her dog died. I tried to cheer her up by getting her an identical one, but then she just yelled at me, "WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH TWO DEAD DOGS!?" (disclaimer: I don't take credit for inventing this joke, but I can't remember its real origin.)