What No One Tells You About Grief Healing with David Kessler

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Commune

Commune

Күн бұрын

Пікірлер: 400
@lisanelson302
@lisanelson302 Жыл бұрын
I lost my mom first to dementia then I lost her to death. My beautiful husband died in the midst of my grief for my mother's dementia. I never knew grief prior. Now 5 years later I can't escape it handle it or process it. My life feels erased from the very moment they died.
@aquariusnorthvision4441
@aquariusnorthvision4441 Жыл бұрын
I just want to say that my heart is with you. your honesty is beautiful and I witness your hurt ...❤
@whitneysmith6752
@whitneysmith6752 Жыл бұрын
Thank you for sharing your grief. That is too much to lose both parent and husband at once. You are sharing what I think is true -my life will never not be about grief. I just lost my beloved father a month ago. As an adult -but not marrried no kids- I was always a daughter first and he was my anchor. My mom now widowed at 90-she is so altered I don’t know who she is. The death of my dad ended my familys happy energy forever. I will long for his loving presence till i pass. Nothing matters as much as I always wanted to show him what I was doing. He’s the only person I shined for. The rest of the world I have never been good enough somehow. What I have found is the ONE thing that connects us as human beings is not the happy markers in life -it’s grief. It’s a whole other world. You are not alone. We all are in the right place on David’s website. ❤
@MrChuckwagon55
@MrChuckwagon55 Жыл бұрын
I feel the same way. It’s been months and I can’t get out of bed and stare at the wall all day.
@SterlingArchimedes
@SterlingArchimedes Жыл бұрын
I'm sorry for your loss. I also lost my father to dementia when I was 23 and lost him again yesterday. I'm 35 now. His suffering kills me, dreaming of what could have been kills me.
@tnt01
@tnt01 Жыл бұрын
They both would want you to be happy and move on with your life. Hugs.
@ElizabethWard-g8z
@ElizabethWard-g8z 7 ай бұрын
Omg , I lost my husband 2 years ago. My life is a mess now. I have not worked for over a year. Staying in bed all day. Hearing you talk was very soothing. And comforting. Making me feel like I am not crazy. I just miss him so much.
@bethheld9512
@bethheld9512 6 ай бұрын
....I get you. It's been 7 months for me, not 1 day goes by that I don't tear up over R, it'll never be over for me til Jesus takes me home.
@dawn291000
@dawn291000 5 ай бұрын
Same exact
@lisabennett1253
@lisabennett1253 4 ай бұрын
I lost my husband of 41 years two years ago. I get what you're saying. Life has gotten so hard. I don't cry (I am afraid to) but I sure do hurt terribly. I'm so sorry for your loss and I am so sorry for your pain. And the missing part, missing them as if that word even does it justice..............that is SO DARN HARD! Thinking of you sister!
@ktvix9234
@ktvix9234 4 ай бұрын
I hear ya. Lost my hubby 8 yrs ago and some days are still like that. ❤🙏
@kellyrawluk2047
@kellyrawluk2047 4 ай бұрын
I'm struggling as well.My husband as well passed away 2 years ago.1 year was I was stronger.Feel stuck,can't seem to move forward. But God will help us .Just take next steps 1 day at a time.
@wendyallen5105
@wendyallen5105 9 ай бұрын
I’m grieving My two adult sons and my 4 grandkids.. it’s Complicated.. our Family has gone through so much Trauma.. Ugly divorce, Suicide.. sudden traumatic death.. We need healing payers.. my grief is estrangement.. grieving the living.. it’s devastating 😢💔
@marshawoods4983
@marshawoods4983 7 ай бұрын
My heart goes out to you because I fully understand I do have lost both my sons My youngest 23years ago and my oldest one last May and three weeks ago my sister died, and that losses in between you ask yourself is this ever going to stop for God sakes!
@thedano
@thedano 7 ай бұрын
I am praying for you
@marnastrydom3186
@marnastrydom3186 7 ай бұрын
🙏🌻🙏
@luguy8347
@luguy8347 6 ай бұрын
Estrangement is pure torture, am deeply sorry for you.
@raindropsfukushemiaflavore9914
@raindropsfukushemiaflavore9914 6 ай бұрын
For those still alive, cling to hope. For lost loved ones, I'm my own mess right now and I don't know if I will ever heal and I keep trying.
@TeresaJohnson-y9w
@TeresaJohnson-y9w 8 ай бұрын
My mom my dad my brother and then my husband passed away within less than 3 months of each other. It was every day I was putting one of my loved ones to rest. I don’t think you ever get done grieving over your family members.
@bethheld9512
@bethheld9512 8 ай бұрын
I'm so sorry to read your great losses....
@nicolep4548
@nicolep4548 6 ай бұрын
I have only lost my mom and my world is upside down . My thoughts are with you.😢
@Flutterbyebutterfly
@Flutterbyebutterfly 4 ай бұрын
I’m so sorry 😔 I lost my Dad then big sister now my Mumma. And the weird thing is my Mum had a heart attack 7 years to the day that my big sister died. 20th June, then on the 21st of June I watched my Mums heart beat get lesser & lesser 😔 I couldn’t take her off life support even though we all knew there was no hope. Now I’ve took on my young brother along with being a single Mum. I feel so alone & not old enough to have to struggle to much I’m 32 without anyone & 2 boys I need to be brave for. Life is so scary & sh*t!!! Again I’m sorry for your loss, I know it won’t help cause it doesn’t help me. 😔💔
@annehedonia156
@annehedonia156 3 ай бұрын
I'm grieving mine while they live due to their deplorable behavior prior to and in the wake of my oldest son's death. I'm one of eight kids and now only speak to my youngest sister and her husband and my youngest brother. We're all the scapegoats now.
@MaryCawley-o9x
@MaryCawley-o9x 3 ай бұрын
You poor pet, how horrible for you, sending you love light and healing
@david53143
@david53143 3 ай бұрын
I have just lost my mother I’m hurting more then I thought I could bear . I miss her so much .
@carynmiller1
@carynmiller1 3 ай бұрын
I’m so sorry . I guess the amount of pain comes from the strength of connection . But I may be 100% wrong. Still very sorry for the loss of your mom.❤️‍🩹
@sianwestcombe1672
@sianwestcombe1672 3 ай бұрын
I'm so sorry to hear about the loss of your mother. I lost mine 9 days ago. Nothing prepares you for the loss of a parent. I am suffering more than I ever thought I would. It's quite unbearable.
@geetanjaleek9579
@geetanjaleek9579 2 ай бұрын
I lost my mom 2 months ago. She was my everything and now I'm all alone in this world. I literally have no one, no family and no relatives worth mentioning. I can't breathe, sleep, eat. She went suddenly. It was mom and me since I lost my dad to cancer at a v young age. Her loss and the fear of being alone is suffocating me. Moreover there are no grief share offline groups in India where your family and relatives are your default support system. I found that support here albeit online.
@ethical_sarah
@ethical_sarah Ай бұрын
❤🙏🏼
@juliansantos3342
@juliansantos3342 25 күн бұрын
I just wanted to send you love and comfort, I am sorry for you loss, I will keep you in my prayers ❤
@SamuelCovert
@SamuelCovert 24 күн бұрын
Hello I'm from india as well and I'm 33 yrs old man and i want to say I'm not a man yet coz i cry like baby every day since my mom died, unfortunately i lost my father also, being an orphan is like hell, I'm praying god daily to take my life and let me join my mother and father.
@juliansantos3342
@juliansantos3342 24 күн бұрын
@@SamuelCovert I am so sorry for what you are going through, your tears are a testament of how much you love your parents, it's natural to cry as much as you want, I have found that time helps heal slowly, you were very fortunate to have enjoyed so much love from your parents and you will give that love back to the world who desperately needs it. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers 🙏 ❤️
@juliansantos3342
@juliansantos3342 24 күн бұрын
@@SamuelCovert I am so sorry for you loss, it's OK to cry rhe death of a loved one is a tragic event and it's your way of manifesting there love for them. I am to sending you love and prayers in this dark moments. I want you to remember that the love of your parents will always be with you and you will pass that love the world as it badly needs it. Things that have help me with grief is talking to somebody, exercising, spending time in the sun , listening to grief videos and religious videos, prayer everytime you feel sad Drinking alot of water Eating until very full Thanking the world for another day Showering and shaving daily Going out for walks Being mindful of how strong you are Understanding it's OK to be sad Taking deep breaths when feeling sad When bad thoughts happen take a deep breath and say a prayer Remember how strong you are Remember God's endless love You are a fighter, God will help you get through this, you are stronger than you think you are One day you will look back and realize how strong you are I am praying for you and keeping you in my thoughts, 🙏🙏🙏
@elizabethl6763
@elizabethl6763 Жыл бұрын
“The river of grief will take you to your healing” that really spoke to me.
@trisharitter
@trisharitter Жыл бұрын
It could also drown you, which is how I’m feeling right now.
@Josephines48
@Josephines48 Жыл бұрын
@@trisharitterme too I lost my hubby April 25, 2023. I am struggling right at this moment. I wish I could turn off my brain and the torment.
@sc855
@sc855 8 ай бұрын
Still waiting, no relief,just pain and sorrow. Feel like I don’t belong anywhere!
@bethheld9512
@bethheld9512 8 ай бұрын
....that river keeps me uncomfortably cold, wet, alone, looking forward to my death, I can't swim, and don't care to learn.
@LadyJ09
@LadyJ09 5 ай бұрын
Tomorrow the water in the river may be calmer
@alimccreery755
@alimccreery755 11 ай бұрын
My little dog Fumi passed away last June, two of my cats have died and several years ago two of my other dogs and another cat passed away. I don’t think I properly grieved and now it’s all hitting me all at once. I miss all of them more than anyone including my own family. It’s one step and one day at a time and if the water works happens I just let myself do it. I miss their friendship and company and prefer to spend time alone. Hugs 🤗 and love coming to everyone here because we are not alone 😊
@glenj.taylor2938
@glenj.taylor2938 6 ай бұрын
The love of an animal is like no other that I've experienced. I've lost three dogs myself thusfar and my dog (more-so my Dad's dog) now is about 15½years old. He is doing great but slowing down. We both know what's on the horizon. I lost my father July of 2023. He was my best friend whom I consciously lived with my whole life and we had a great life together. I miss him immensely and "my dog" misses his just as much, if not more. The lesson my first dog taught me is "It's better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all." Life It's all just part of Life. It all hurst more than I can put into words but who I am, the love I have for animals and those who are worth loving is a result of having had the absolute blessing of a relationship with my dogs, father, family, and friends. Easier said than done but there's always more out there that are need of your life, your love. I hope you find it in you to put that out there again because it will be returned. ❤
@alimccreery755
@alimccreery755 6 ай бұрын
@@glenj.taylor2938 thank you for your support 🥰🤗
@tmk68
@tmk68 Жыл бұрын
I lost my 6 year old grand daughter in a sudden car accident and her mother as well 2 months ago. I haven't stopped crying. It hurts so bad. And then there's the pain I feel for my son and my other granddaughter. It's so overwhelming. I'm so glad I found this. I'm going to continue to grieve my way and listen to more of your powerful advice !
@richardverdugo5658
@richardverdugo5658 Жыл бұрын
My deepest condolences. Stay strong
@hollywachin
@hollywachin Жыл бұрын
Being witness to the pain of your son & granddaughter while deep in the ocean of your own despair is overwhelming. Please be oh so gentle with yourself. One breath at a time darling. One breath at a time.
@angelapage4927
@angelapage4927 Жыл бұрын
Sending you my heart ❤️ felt condolences 🙏 x
@marypelliott
@marypelliott 3 күн бұрын
@@tmk68 I'm so very sorry, dear.
@chrisknox2361
@chrisknox2361 Күн бұрын
I lost all last Friday. My love of 15 years. Tammy was a very special lady.
@adrienne3272
@adrienne3272 3 ай бұрын
My sister died in September and it was really hard watching people just live their lives while I just sat there feeling broken I'm glad someone spoke on this.
@minimalistqueen2992
@minimalistqueen2992 9 күн бұрын
That’s what I’m feeling right now. My father in law was shot in the head by his step son on September 2nd and I’m devastated ! I gotta come to work everyday and people are just living their life. Of course when you tell them you lost someone they’ll say “I’m so sorry about that. Sorry for your loss “‘etc… but then they continue living their lives while I’m sitting at my work desk confused. I was upset with management because they don’t seem to know how to empathize. If anything , the living is hell
@lorideaton7868
@lorideaton7868 7 ай бұрын
Thank you. I lost my daughter 5 months ago and have been struggling but I have started to see a therapist. My daughter died unexpectedly from a severe asthma attack. I lost my Dad when I was 11 and it took me 30 years to heal. I am 68 and I want to face my grief and heal the best I can.
@mariespi96
@mariespi96 2 ай бұрын
Sending you hugs. May you find the peace you need to continue on this journey called life. I was listening to The Temptations I wish it would rain.
@juliansantos3342
@juliansantos3342 25 күн бұрын
I am so sorry for your love. I will keep you in my prayers and sending you love through this comment ❤❤
@helsbels2582
@helsbels2582 3 ай бұрын
I lost both mum and dad two and a half weeks apart in Feb 2024. I have my crying moments but believe they have gone to a better place and are reunited with those that have gone before them. I believe hell is here on earth and we do suffer here on earth. Heaven is governed by God and is a peaceful, loving place and earth is governed by greedy, selfish humans. Anyway, that is what I believe.
@mgomilar4318
@mgomilar4318 3 ай бұрын
It's been 10 years since I lost the love of my life my husband of 19years and he is still missed immensely and it hurts deeply. Tears run easily and heart aches...😢
@SedonaGrace
@SedonaGrace 8 ай бұрын
I grieved when I lost my husband bit by bit through dementia. But when he died, that took my grief to a whole different level and intense.
@gladyspagan6410
@gladyspagan6410 7 ай бұрын
I went through the same experience when my husband showed the first symptoms of dementia I started grieving.When he passed away it was too hard, after nine months it is about the same. Blessings
@Kimber-san
@Kimber-san 6 ай бұрын
My worst fear my entire life was losing my dad. Then dementia so cruel stole the dad I knew and needed. I knew I grieved him daily. 3 weeks ago he got his wings. I am broken. I want him back, I miss him even in the mind state he was in. He was the King of the family and that whole is huge. Dementia is so cruel. I wish I could fix it for everyone. I’m so sorry for your loss. I understand the pain you feel. We were blessed although right now I just can’t see it. ❤
@simbomaphanga4402
@simbomaphanga4402 4 ай бұрын
You think u will be in control as you saw the worst coming and grieved them while they are still alive.The blow and pain just feel worse. Lost my mom 2 months ago and I'm taking it day by day, it's a lot😢
@Energy8Frequency8Vibration
@Energy8Frequency8Vibration Жыл бұрын
Thank you my beloved cat Harry passed away 5 days ago and he was in my world and was my family for 16 years so difficult week for me and this was helpful.
@laurieloudamy1846
@laurieloudamy1846 11 ай бұрын
I’m so very, very sorry for your tremendous loss. I lost my sweet 16 year old dog, Luc on 04Oct, and I am devastated and so sad. I lost my precious Desi 14Dec, and am so devastated by his loss, too. My deepest condolences to you and you are in my prayers.
@ntitus3025
@ntitus3025 Жыл бұрын
I did judge myself for grieving as long as I have, until I just surrendered to it. My grief has many faces.
@IsabelChung-n2u
@IsabelChung-n2u 2 ай бұрын
As a grief counsellor myself. I have learned so much from you. You are wise and insightful. Thank you.
@paulpat9022
@paulpat9022 5 ай бұрын
I lost my 4 years old daughter three months ago, The unimaginable pain I feel is overwhelming. Hearing you is quite suiting. I hope the pain I feel reduces.
@sari8619
@sari8619 2 ай бұрын
How are you ? ❤
@paulpat9022
@paulpat9022 2 ай бұрын
@@sari8619 I’m getting better, The realization that she’s not coming back is overwhelming. I know she’s is in a better place and I take consolation in that.
@sari8619
@sari8619 2 ай бұрын
@@paulpat9022 she is ♥️ And im so glad that you are too, even if its just a little bit easier to be. Remember to take care of yourself ♥️
@nyb101
@nyb101 Ай бұрын
What’s the worst loss? Your loss. That’s truly precious to say to people.
@MyStutteringLife
@MyStutteringLife 7 ай бұрын
My 20-year-old son was killed by a drunk driver on 11/13/23, and I am lost broken numb.......I finally reached out to find a grief therapist but every day is painful exhausting
@CoachPattyBlueHayes
@CoachPattyBlueHayes 7 ай бұрын
I can’t even imagine that kind of traumatic loss 😢 I’m so very sorry.
@MyStutteringLife
@MyStutteringLife 7 ай бұрын
🙏​@@CoachPattyBlueHayes
@raindropsfukushemiaflavore9914
@raindropsfukushemiaflavore9914 6 ай бұрын
Biggest hugs
@rickkeegan5977
@rickkeegan5977 5 ай бұрын
So sorry for such a horrific loss . Losing a child is the worst.😢
@DonnaLambeau
@DonnaLambeau 11 ай бұрын
Thank you. I needed to hear all of this. My best friend died a year ago and my ex-husband died January 1st, 2023. We had been married twenty eight years. I still grieve for his loss even though we had been divorced for twelve years. Then on August ninth, 2023 my mom died. Some days I just can't do all this grieving over three people who I loved so much. I journal, talk to my friends and pray. Staying positive and having gratitude really helps a lot. The longer we fight it, the longer your grieving might last for the rest of your life. Grief is part of being a human being. Grief is normal. I pray everyone has a blessed day filled with peace, joy and love. ❤❤
@audreya9859
@audreya9859 6 ай бұрын
My ex husband passed away last week he was my best friend and father to my oldest son he also helped raise my 2 younger kids. I don't know how to get through this. We've known each other for 27 years and made so many plans even though we divorced we planned on growing old together and he was my husband's best friend as well. I'm just devastated.
@debbiebolek2117
@debbiebolek2117 4 ай бұрын
God bless you. You are very positine❤
@lilianaolaverojas
@lilianaolaverojas 27 күн бұрын
Having gone through so much loss , mother passed when i was a child so learnt to grow without parents , I believe we have to make a pact with ourselves, we have to grieve but we have to get back up and carry on living ...when people pass they go to another spiritual plane ..energy is eternal it changes it's physicality so that's hard not see them , Life is a gift we must understand that a loved one will always want our happiness and we have to become a whole in ourselves we need to keep going towards dreams , grieve but don't forget to live & love is eternal don't close yourself off from it ❤
@horrorbiz72
@horrorbiz72 9 ай бұрын
I needed this today. I lost my only brother on May 4, 2023. To add insult to injury, when I called to schedule a session with my therapist of 7 years, I was informed that he had passed as well. It’s now December 2023, and I fell the pain in my heart every single day. These videos are very insightful and helpful. Thank you!
@sophiaduarte745
@sophiaduarte745 8 ай бұрын
My Condolences to You For losing Your Beloved Brother. Also Your Therapist. May our LORD heal Your Heart and Emotions.
@Justiceforallforever
@Justiceforallforever 7 ай бұрын
I am very sorry for you. Take care.
@lilaroizman1147
@lilaroizman1147 6 ай бұрын
I lost my child and your video is helping. Thank you.
@angelabrame1160
@angelabrame1160 10 ай бұрын
Thank you. I thought something is wrong with me because I’ve literally cried everyday for two years. The tears are now 1 or 2 times a day instead of all day. I’m was becoming embarrassed! I was hiding it. I was told I just want a pity party. So thank you. From my heart thank you.
@JamilaJibril-e8h
@JamilaJibril-e8h 7 ай бұрын
😢😢
@bethheld9512
@bethheld9512 6 ай бұрын
... I understand that daily thing, I'm going through that also....😪
@anastasiakesky
@anastasiakesky 4 ай бұрын
I am crying every day for two years and six months. It doesn't get better. Can't sleep, I just suffer, enormously.
@annehedonia156
@annehedonia156 3 ай бұрын
​@anastasiakesky Same. I lost my oldest son 2.5 years ago, and I still cry and scream bloody murder into my pillow. I don't even think God can fix me at this point.
@dawnmarshall1290
@dawnmarshall1290 Ай бұрын
''The river of grief'...beautiful analogy. Please let this river be swift..
@annsjoholm7310
@annsjoholm7310 7 ай бұрын
I lost my brother to suicide recently, everything is changed, i'm changed. I miss him so much and there are no answers. Thank you ❤️
@CoachPattyBlueHayes
@CoachPattyBlueHayes 7 ай бұрын
I’m so sorry 😢 That is a tremendous loss and a complex grief.
@annsjoholm7310
@annsjoholm7310 7 ай бұрын
@@CoachPattyBlueHayes Thank you ❤️
@annsjoholm7310
@annsjoholm7310 6 ай бұрын
@@CoachPattyBlueHayes Thank you!
@Vledimor
@Vledimor 8 ай бұрын
my friend died from brain cancer in the time of just two weeks... just when her syptoms appeard. we knew each othe only a year but we had a so deepful relationship and we were so much alike. im grieving 4 months now, i dont want to go to our university cause i have so much anger in me and so much sadness. no one gets me, they dont get the pain i feel. they all say just dont be depressed things like this are happening all the time, u cant escape death etc etc. This person was one of the most wonderful and kind persons that i had encountered and she was trying her best to do in life with all the struggles that she had. she is gonna live in my memories forever , her emotions and our moments are still here deep in my heart. my grieving says that she was the most sweet girl and that my love for her is still alive even in an different way. i may fail in the university but i cant stand going there with everyone acting like nothing happened.
@mkf628
@mkf628 8 ай бұрын
what you feel is normal, lots of love.
@sarahevans3622
@sarahevans3622 Жыл бұрын
This is powerful! Our son died two years ago and I've often felt stuck and wondered why I'm not further along. This gives me permission to feel my grief and not push it away.
@4vlnstrings
@4vlnstrings 11 ай бұрын
I lost my son four years ago. Losing a child is so very devastating, at least for me. I still fight depression, I cry often, and feel he was cheated of his life and love.
@Wiggysmooth23
@Wiggysmooth23 11 ай бұрын
My son went home to daddy house last month. I haven’t experienced grief like everyone else. I know he’s with God and Jesus. He was only 21. I can’t bring myself to cry or mourn because I don’t believe in death. I know that Christ lives in us and was in my son. And I spoke of Christ often giving my family that spiritual guidance while alive. None of me or my children have fallen apart. Because I knew that every bit of my understanding and strength literally comes from God. Seek him and he can remove the hurts and pains. There’s nothing wrong with grieving but it takes so much of your time away to live. Live everyday in the moment. Love yourself enough to heal
@katemchardy542
@katemchardy542 6 ай бұрын
My dad died almost 60 years ago when I was a child. I have gone through many layers of grief ... but the biggest shift has happened in the last 2 days. 60 years later? Yes. I realised that I have been holding onto him and looking for him in every man I have ever known - never mind the ones I have fallen in love with who, god help them never stood a chance. II have spent the last two days allowing him to go to the light and understanding that he never abandoned me and never left me and that now he can be with me more freely as I have let him go and respected his spirit in ways that I didn't even know I wasn't doing. 60 years but better late than never! Thankyou for your work David ... I wish you had been around before you were even born!!
@juliefisk8066
@juliefisk8066 6 ай бұрын
I left my 31-year marriage. It was so awful, so much mental, emotional, spiritual, and financial abuse. During our separation, he would message me asking me to work it out, all while being on dating websites and actively dating. Now, he's known someone for 6 weeks and they are getting married. Everything I loved was stupid, ridiculous, and ignorant, but she loves the exact same things and they are great! She resembles me, physically, has an extremely similar haircut, body type, etc. It's maddening and hurtful. I know he is bad for me and my mental health, but I'm just stuck in the why's! My kids tell me to "just let it go." We made horrible mistakes as parents, I've done everything I can to make amends, I never get a pass when things come up, but he does because, "that's just how he is." I'm sorry, I'm just so hurt, sad, and stuck...
@remedyrescue
@remedyrescue 5 ай бұрын
He's a selfish sob and you're better off without him! He showed you who he is, believe it. Get on with your own life! Your kids are right. It's your time to be happy and to have the life you've always wanted and deserve! He did you a favour! You were the parents your kids specifically chose. Now that the soul contract is over, grieve all the losses and sadness, and start investing in you now and what you want to do with your life. Once you start to give yourself the love and kindness you didn't get, you will one day become a magnet for the right partner. You deserve to be happy! Wishing you well! Angel blessings from Precious Sweetheart ❤🙏🙂
@juliefisk8066
@juliefisk8066 5 ай бұрын
@@remedyrescue thank you so much. A lot has happened since I made this comment. I finally addressed the lies and rumors that were being said about me. That felt really good. I also got rid of my wedding rings, another bold and amazing decision. I couldn't imagine passing on something with such bad memories attached to them. That probably felt the best! Letting them go was really cathartic. I felt such amazing relief. I also dyed my hair the color I had always wanted, that he said was stupid! Pink! I feel good about everything that's happened! Thank you for your kind words. I really needed them. Much love and blessings to you!
@goldalevin869
@goldalevin869 5 ай бұрын
You were a different person then and did the best you could. What you may be missing is the fantasy because the reality sounds different.
@juliefisk8066
@juliefisk8066 5 ай бұрын
@goldalevin869 I absolutely agree. I lived with the hope that things would eventually change. I did spend many, many days, weeks, months, and years fantasizing about what could be and should be. I waited years for the man I married to return to me. About 10 years ago, I realized that I was no longer in love with him. This time, I waited patiently for MY feelings to return to me. I remained a good wife, I did the things I'd always done. Eventually, I came to the conclusion that this was as good as it would get. As time continued on, and things never changed, I came to the conclusion that I could no longer live like this. I made my plans quietly. It was hard to walk away. My heart broken, but I knew it was time. This past year has been difficult and sad. I have turned a corner and finally feel free. He continues to bad mouth me, even though he apparently has moved on and is getting married next month. I find that odd. I'm not addressing any of it as I did in the beginning, I don't find it necessary to defend myself anymore. I walked away for very good reasons, and I'm done. I deserve to be happy, and that's my goal. Thank you so very much for your comment. I truly appreciate it. I lived in that fantasy for far too long and will never live there again!
@Aash0999
@Aash0999 Жыл бұрын
I lost my dad and my sister six months ago and I can't express how much painful losing them both in just one month. Sometimes I can't believe that happened. I've been through a lot this year but grieving their death is beyond any pain and loss. Thank you for this video, I feel somehow better after listening to you. What you said is very helpful and touching.
@christineowens791
@christineowens791 10 ай бұрын
im sorry..lost my Dad last week..my sister in 2015..i love how he said we r built to handle grief
@heatherwhatever7714
@heatherwhatever7714 10 ай бұрын
My psychiatrist said this should last about a month. This is a 36 year relationship/marriage. I said this, my third year, has involved crying I’ve never done. It’s been daily. It’s easing and it is a complicated grief. Big highs, big lows. I’m doing my best. I’ve eaten when I didn’t want to, exercised when I didn’t want to, etc. I’m starting to get excited about things that brought me joy but that felt flat. I can see that it’s a process I didn’t experience with other griefs. I stuffed parts of those. Thank you for addressing that “I’ll never stop crying” fear. I did stuff it but in other areas knew to lean in. The day came…no more stuffing. I wasn’t leaning in but it got ahead of me and something tripped that switch. Just like stuffing other things and learning to share in my 12th step program, I let openness happen long enough that the “normal stuffing” wouldn’t do that for long anymore.
@trishmaris689
@trishmaris689 8 ай бұрын
Thank you David. My husband of 42 years passed 14 months ago So appreciate your kind words
@marymuscat7482
@marymuscat7482 11 ай бұрын
I lost my husband, mrhs ago 😢 I miss him so much, each day is so painful all I have is memories now but when I think of those memories I still feel pain in my heart 😢
@bethheld9512
@bethheld9512 8 ай бұрын
I can relate, my husband died of starving to death via pancreatic cancer, this past August, ...for 3 months I cried daily, and it was physically painful like I was in a vice grip from chest down.....crying out to GOD to stop the pain was effective, ....I still cry daily, losing desire to continue on, nothing brings me any joy....
@marcelamarcela7540
@marcelamarcela7540 5 ай бұрын
My grief is not from lost.I cry every day for 40 years because i need love and i didnt find it until now so it is not lost because i never had love and this is reason of my grief.....so i dont agree that grief is only lost....it is not only lost...it is also loning for something what is blocked for you in life like love fore me.
@thegardenguide2650
@thegardenguide2650 3 ай бұрын
Plz enjoy life.love urself.nourish urself.
@mgrv29
@mgrv29 3 ай бұрын
I’ve never heard anyone speak about grief so gracefully and beautifully. This is a gorgeous talk - thank you for producing and sharing it.
@kristineholcroft9163
@kristineholcroft9163 3 ай бұрын
Thank you so mucb your message is so comforting i just lost my mom grandma other family and just found out the father of my child died age 42 wishing everyone love comfort as well
@eliseessenmacher7950
@eliseessenmacher7950 2 жыл бұрын
Thank you ❤ I lost my mother unexpectedly in April. This is extremely helpful. 🙏🏼
@celestialblissfulness
@celestialblissfulness Жыл бұрын
My father passed April 2022 as well 🙏🏼💚
@eliseessenmacher7950
@eliseessenmacher7950 Жыл бұрын
@@celestialblissfulness ❤️❤️❤️
@helenacogan4188
@helenacogan4188 Жыл бұрын
My beautiful sister Marie went home to source in April also - xxx - we loved each other - that’s what I hold dear!!!
@laurieloudamy1846
@laurieloudamy1846 11 ай бұрын
I’m so very, very sorry for the loss of your mother. My deepest condolences to you and you are in my prayers.
@jodiegall3366
@jodiegall3366 9 ай бұрын
Thank you for talking to me❤
@whitneytogba1878
@whitneytogba1878 11 ай бұрын
I lost my mom, sister, daughter, and 2 nieces at once to a fire incident at our house a month ago. I sat there and watched them burn to death. I don't know how I feel 💔😭
@robloxbros7989
@robloxbros7989 10 ай бұрын
Ohh my god 🙏 I’m crying reading this. I also lost my 19 years son from accident june 21 n my mother suffering from cancer on august 16th I’m suffering too much with pain. Now I’m living for my second son like half dead. God don’t give pain for kids front of parents
@mommam.6101
@mommam.6101 9 ай бұрын
My heart breaks for you, I am crying for you right now because although I have experienced losing many people over the years, I have never experienced a tragedy to that extent all at once. There are many many scriptures in the Bible that show that God promises a resurrection. The 11th chapter of John talks about when Jesus resurrected Lazarus, and Acts 24:15 speaks of God resurrecting the righteous and the unrighteous. If you do some research it may bring peace to your heart. It's a complex subject and many untruths have been taught. I will pray for you.
@tamarakoz5167
@tamarakoz5167 8 ай бұрын
It is very hard . I can only say I know what you feel . I lost my both sons . The elder was killed by a car on a crossing . In full health and before marriage . 22 months later the younger , 30 year old , was killed by three volunteers in a rehab center . I have buried all my family before . Five months have passed . I have watched and listened and read much here . The biggest torture a human may have to undergo . Life …I am also surprised that I am functioning . Though it is the miserable resemblance of my former me .
@mommam.6101
@mommam.6101 8 ай бұрын
@@tamarakoz5167 what a horrible thing to go through. Just know that Jesus promised a resurrection and we may see our loved ones again. Acts 20:15, John, 11:25 and many others. Do a search in a Bible app.
@TheMisssy2
@TheMisssy2 4 ай бұрын
"Doesn't mean you have to grief in pain" 2 years I was wondering if I am ever going to get better, after hearing you say it is "early grief" I felt relieved. 10 years...lost him to another woman, my son lost his girlfriend to another guy at the same time and I was doing double grief "complicated grief" because every Mom wants her son happy. My grief wants me to know that I truly did everything I could.
@farrahfrench7690
@farrahfrench7690 Жыл бұрын
This grief is killing me! I just want to join my baby
@fairy12324
@fairy12324 Жыл бұрын
I understand ❤ I'm so 😞 sorry. Message u if u want to vent. I lost my boy,mother and grandmother last year. The 2 years before that 10 year relationship breakdown. Father dying. Uncle dying and cousin being killed. Sending so much light your way. God help us or universe or what ever makes sense xx
@bethheld9512
@bethheld9512 8 ай бұрын
....can relate....
@JoyceShupe
@JoyceShupe 15 күн бұрын
Hold on. I too lost my baby. In time you will heal. Joy will come again. I wish you strength.
@annaalm18
@annaalm18 6 ай бұрын
Thank you David ❤
@righteousbyfaithinChrist
@righteousbyfaithinChrist 2 ай бұрын
Early grief. Mature grief. My grief needs to be witnessed... needs to be seen... Thank you for your much needed content. I'm too exhausted to try to repeat the complicated grief situation I'm in right now...
@sudhakar7889
@sudhakar7889 Жыл бұрын
Such great video. I could understand it as my tears dropped unstoppable.
@Bertajohns-ennis
@Bertajohns-ennis 9 ай бұрын
Your talk about grief was very helpful to me I lost my son of 57 years, we very close and I was his caretaker for 7 years. And I am having a very hard time. You talk about the stick in te river was helpful. Leo the end about feeling our grief and why is it tellin us .
@joannedobkin3363
@joannedobkin3363 7 ай бұрын
Thank you. I’m still triggered by things I joined my husband to his friends service who passed and was overwhelmed with grief crying when I saw all the people that showed up and the pictures and a movie on his life. My mother had just me at the funeral home no celebration but I connected instantly with his mom at the service and we exchanged numbers. I will do anything to support her in her loss knowing how hard it is for me. I didn’t sleep through the night after that trigger I woke up crying in the middle of the night. Happiness isn’t here yet I pray one day to have happy moments. I find the I tube forum so supportive. People here understand my struggle thank you for your support. It means a lot because I had no support. That leaves a void. 😢
@klanderkal
@klanderkal 7 ай бұрын
Thank you!!.. for mentioning that Grief is anything you are connected to, and different to us as fingerprints. My loss of my career job, has destroyed me!!, months later,.. im still suffering deeply for my loss. Thank you.. 🙏
@60seconds529
@60seconds529 4 ай бұрын
At least you understand, you are warm, kind and appreciated, thank you
@paradoxnurse
@paradoxnurse 6 ай бұрын
I am at a loss of what to do as I navigate a divorce from 25 years of amazing, blessed memories. She has moved on, in a new relationship with a married man, she is a home wrecker twice and still will not accept any fault for the ruin of ours. I can't seem to move on, like I fell in the river and it's not moving.
@laurieloudamy1846
@laurieloudamy1846 11 ай бұрын
Thank you for your understanding and compassion.
@stevennovella378
@stevennovella378 Жыл бұрын
What a wonderful video to put out. I am 11-months into this hell called grief. This one video helped me, actually helped me. Thank you.
@Haxzyr
@Haxzyr 25 күн бұрын
My grief wants me to know that I will examine the complications throughly and committedly.
@hs964
@hs964 28 күн бұрын
Thank you
@paulb.6751
@paulb.6751 3 ай бұрын
Thank you. Thank you. Your words so desperately need to be heard and not only by the one most devastated, but to those close loved ones who care deeply but don't know What to do.
@SelenaK
@SelenaK Жыл бұрын
This was so helpful to hear…now I realize that I have been “an island of grief” for a year and a half.
@cassandraburton6132
@cassandraburton6132 10 ай бұрын
. Deepest thanks for these words of kindness and wisdom. 🧡
@kyriakivavoulis7554
@kyriakivavoulis7554 2 жыл бұрын
😍grieving with more love than pain...
@klanderkal
@klanderkal 7 ай бұрын
Retirement... extreme grief. No interest in life, loss of interests now in all my sports and activities. I sunk into horrible depression.. im so unhappy,... and unable to move on..?!?!. Ive been mocked by friend that, I SHOULD be happy, i should do this, that... and be grateful. Im hurting so bad... im sorry everyone. Im not handling this well. 🙏😩
@CoachPattyBlueHayes
@CoachPattyBlueHayes 7 ай бұрын
That is actually quite common for many newly retired people. Have you considered starting small with a gratitude practice? Build up to volunteer work and consider signing up for a class that interests you.
@klanderkal
@klanderkal 7 ай бұрын
@youcanhealyourheartbreak5999 Thank you, for replying. Its so difficult for me., as I didn't have to retire...! I'm hurting without my job and the workplace activities & coworkers. Struggling with the depression.... unable to do anything. [yet].. I have been starting to walk,... and excersize. Practice gratitude, I have been trying this , outloud verbally.. though I'm not feeling it, I'm saying it. Hopefully SOON, this darn depressed will leave my mind, and set me free, to do things with enjoyment & motivation. Volunteering sounds interesting. Never experienced this illness before ,... it's scary and doesn't make sense. [ you know you like something, ( like working on your VW) but, have no interest or motivation to work on it]??? or.. I like to workout,... but, no longer want to, nor enjoy it while doing it.???.. it doesn't male sense. .. thanks again for helping me. K.
@CoachPattyBlueHayes
@CoachPattyBlueHayes 7 ай бұрын
@@klanderkal It absolutely makes sense! Your work life was a huge part of your life; confidence, feeling valued, social connections, routine, contribution. You miss that. You might consider doing something like writing a letter to that part of your life to express your feelings. Also, you can write what you’ve gained from those years of your working life, with the view that you don’t lose that, that’s your personal gift you get to keep from all those years of experience. I’d also suggest Google searching for ‘depressed after retirement’. It will help you to read stories of others who feel the same. 🙏🌟
@jaymie8082
@jaymie8082 5 ай бұрын
❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
@klanderkal
@klanderkal 5 ай бұрын
@@jaymie8082 💐🙏💐
@tamarafields5703
@tamarafields5703 10 ай бұрын
Thank you for this video. It has helped me to see some different ways that are holding our family in the complicated state as well as for myself not being able to allow my grief to be witnessed because my sister lost her daughter and it seems like my loss of a niece isn't comparable but I promise you my grief is as deep and heartbreaking as if she were my own child. I have learned to express it privately. I did make a huge mistake yesterday in not allowing my sister's pain on the first Thanksgiving without her be acknowledged or witnessed. Because of watching this today I am going to make it up to her today when the opportunity presents itself. Thank you again. God Bless.
@klanderkal
@klanderkal 7 ай бұрын
🙏Thank you SO much Dr. Kessler. You've mentioned something no one has said about Grief. I'm hurting so bad. I lost my long time career job, and I miss everything about it.! My coworkers, my job itself, workplace, social interactions, the busses I drove, etc.. Im in always pain. The pain in my chest... and constant sadness of knowing I cannot return. I've lost interest in my life,... My family, friends, neighbors want me to " let go, move on " ... but, im unable. I cannot Snap-out of this. Life is continuing, yet im not involved. Thank you for understanding, my loss is real.
@elainegalang2678
@elainegalang2678 Жыл бұрын
Thank you for being a part of my grieving process as I am going through it I love this channel
@stillintheheartrebornnurse4072
@stillintheheartrebornnurse4072 Жыл бұрын
My name is Jana from oklahomai lost my granddaughter dec. 18 2023. It was the hardest thing ever lost siblings my mother but I guess it was because she was only 31 and I raised her from a baby its April of 23 why am I. Still greiving her I can't get thru day without crying .im trying so hard but I miss her so much .
@susanwale8887
@susanwale8887 Жыл бұрын
@raindropsfukushemiaflavore9914
@raindropsfukushemiaflavore9914 6 ай бұрын
I'm not sure n I do know there are different levels of grief. I've just had two deep shattering deaths n the only thing I can think of is.....our love for them is that deep n connected that our grief is also that deep n connected. It's pain that I don't know how to live with. I'm sorry to you for your deep loss. Biggest hugs
@vickifrederick2934
@vickifrederick2934 11 ай бұрын
Thanks. I have watched probably 30 podcast on grief and pet loss.perhaps because I am a nurse practitioner,I need facts,data,hard data. The others have not given me some info,some ranges . I do not know how many times I have heard that grief is different for everything.. I know no that I am normal and not necessarily needed help because I am still crying after a month. Will follow your series and expect this to last a long time but to get better as that time passes. Appreciate you!
@janetboodhoo2111
@janetboodhoo2111 Жыл бұрын
Omg i can give you a big hug because i feel just like that need some one to listen but there no one .
@Calathump
@Calathump 2 ай бұрын
Thanks David. The concept of complicated grief really helped me situate my own experience. It seems this approach is a way to get a complicated experience to a point where grief can happen more simply. Kind of like a form of allowance or acceptance. Beautiful.
@titamargarita9582
@titamargarita9582 8 ай бұрын
Mr. Kessler: thank you. Finally grief truly explained as is. ❤
@jhimmelberger5371
@jhimmelberger5371 4 ай бұрын
My grief would say to me. "I am a reaction to your loss of love. So the reason, I, grief am here, is because your wife's life meant so much more to you, and a little less to others". Then grief would say, "this isn't a meandering trip down the river, it is about slowly adjusting to life without the love and companionship you thought would be there forever".
@dorothybooth5977
@dorothybooth5977 9 ай бұрын
Thank you i lost my husband of 60 years
@joystone8722
@joystone8722 3 ай бұрын
This is soooo helpful !
@sophiaduarte745
@sophiaduarte745 9 ай бұрын
I had extreme grief when my mother Died, Jesus healed my broken heart.
@망고1호
@망고1호 8 ай бұрын
I also want to be healed by Jesus. That's what I want!
@sophiaduarte745
@sophiaduarte745 8 ай бұрын
@@망고1호 Amen I pray for Your healing In Jesus name Amen.
@망고1호
@망고1호 8 ай бұрын
@@sophiaduarte745 Thank you so much. We are brothers and sisters in Jesus and our Father God.
@MrPeterschmit
@MrPeterschmit 6 ай бұрын
Sorry but Jesus is imaginary. If you put your trust in him you'll be gone forever. Hug what's real. Hug your dog.
@sophiaduarte745
@sophiaduarte745 6 ай бұрын
@@MrPeterschmit That's a lie Jesus healed my mind Body, if you choose not to believe in Jesus that's your choice But I am living proof of the Power Of Jesus.
@charlenehernandez8546
@charlenehernandez8546 9 ай бұрын
Its. Very hard when you lose too many, back to back funerals mb erals..
@RC2214
@RC2214 7 ай бұрын
You have spoken in such insight and clarity, thank you so much for this video, warm gratitude. I'm going through Anticipatory Grief with my elderly father-in-law with a chronic illness. Also hard witnessing my husband in his grief as well, like i'm feeling it for him as well.
@joycekanadet481
@joycekanadet481 Жыл бұрын
Ouch & Wow!!!!! 🔥 🔥 🔥 Ur Words David Always Touch Just Right!!! Thank You!!!
@francinebasis8721
@francinebasis8721 Жыл бұрын
Thank you, these details are comforting to understand what I've been living with for a year.
@megfitch8117
@megfitch8117 2 жыл бұрын
Thank you David. This was helpful to me.🔆
@angelastars27
@angelastars27 23 күн бұрын
I love these comments y’all are my people. ❤
@hienienguyen6766
@hienienguyen6766 4 ай бұрын
my dad just passed away. i am just in shock of all this. i have talked to my close friend and she is helping me with my grieving process. This made me feel so many different emotions
@seed.meditation
@seed.meditation 4 ай бұрын
My condolence to you
@brederoux
@brederoux Жыл бұрын
I don't think a mother will ever get over the lost time with a child
@shareeharms5421
@shareeharms5421 7 ай бұрын
Thank you David- it feels like a Tsunami but it is a river. I will take that!
@cbrashsorensen
@cbrashsorensen 12 күн бұрын
I am a friend to someone who lost her husband 2 1/2 years ago. It is SO difficult to be with her. I just want to run away from her drama and seeming clinging to the trauma of her husband's death. I just cannot bear to be with my friend any longer.
@janetboodhoo2111
@janetboodhoo2111 Жыл бұрын
Thank you so much.
@conniedavis4751
@conniedavis4751 5 ай бұрын
I'm grieving over my husband having a stoke,and now he can't work or do much any more.
@stillintheheartrebornnurse4072
@stillintheheartrebornnurse4072 Жыл бұрын
My daughter-in-law says I'm bringing everyone down it's been 4 months
@mkf628
@mkf628 Жыл бұрын
non-sense, grief doesn't have a timeline, sending you love
@bethheld9512
@bethheld9512 8 ай бұрын
....it's been 5 months, can't talk for crying, I isolate so to not make others uncomfortable, .... I prefer death than this myself.
@klanderkal
@klanderkal 7 ай бұрын
Same here .. I should this, that, etc.. im unable to want, do, or go anywhere. I'm always Hurting inside., .. im just hurting...
@bethheld9512
@bethheld9512 7 ай бұрын
They just don't understand the chronic painful crying, ..... been there done that, makes you want to be alone, curl up and die so no one will feel uncomfortable around you, ...then I read something giving me peace with my non stop crying....it's not a bone fracture that is initially painful and will heal, it's a sorry assed amputation open wound that will never heal, I send you prayers for peace, comfort from Holy Spirit, it took about 6 months for me before I could function.
@karlroyce-bainbridge1391
@karlroyce-bainbridge1391 7 ай бұрын
Thank you. Love life and blessings to you for your help. ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
@catarinamatos3862
@catarinamatos3862 28 күн бұрын
I lost my boyfriend to suicide a few days ago, he is the love of my life and my soulmate. The intense pain from grief is debilitating.
@mumsylydz
@mumsylydz 4 ай бұрын
Thanks for this video . I lost my partner last month we been together 12 years.😢😢😢😢 I can’t explain the pain no words can explain as I miss him so much . He was diagnosed lung cancer last Feb 2024 & died April 2024 it happened so fast really fast 🥲 I just find my strength through my faith in God Jesus Christ & my kids, my family , my friends & fellow Christian, & I just think of Good memories & funny memories with my partner, his such a funny guy he always made me laugh . I miss him so much but he is always in my hearts in our Hearts. Rest in peace my darling Till we meet again ❤
@seed.meditation
@seed.meditation 4 ай бұрын
My condolence to you. I pray for him. I believe that in this Universe we all have bonding. Somewhere he is with us. Respect
@charlenehernandez8546
@charlenehernandez8546 9 ай бұрын
Messed up comment.. Very hard when you lose a lot of family members, n how can you " feel" how to do it.. grief is very hard.during vivid and till now..
@Lyrielonwind
@Lyrielonwind Жыл бұрын
If my grief could speak to me, it will tell me I'm confusing releasing sorrow with releasing love. It will tell me I'm not betraying anyone but myself by making myself punishable for a loss it happened to me but I wasn't responsible for since I never wished for it and I was as I am, powerless against fate and natural or accidental losses and even for the love I have never received since I'm powerless over other's will and life itself. Surround to what you can't control and accept life in its own terms.
@bhagyashreesarkar1370
@bhagyashreesarkar1370 Жыл бұрын
Thank you for clearing my thoughts and helping me dealing with my grief
@rosegarden7517
@rosegarden7517 Жыл бұрын
You have done wonders for my sibling. Thank you so much.
@pjones7012
@pjones7012 Жыл бұрын
thank you so much.
@cosmosprincess20
@cosmosprincess20 Жыл бұрын
I resonated with "how present can you be to release the pain and find the growth" im not doing it wrong, I'm still in early grief
@MS-ns4ki
@MS-ns4ki Жыл бұрын
I was extremely depressed when my sister died. As a result of this, I was missed judged by a lot of people. They thought that other people better than anyone. In fact, those people are just very spoiled .
@Viney209
@Viney209 Жыл бұрын
I am so glad to have found your videos... I lost my mother to small cell lung cancer just over 2 weeks ago, it is a very serious form of cancer that spreads throughout the body and is generally not diagnosed until the week or days before they pass. I had no chance for anticipatory grief, I had no idea she even had cancer or was going to die, the morning I called the ambulance and they picked her up, and when the diagnosis was given to us it hit me like a bus while holding her hand in the hospital bed... not even 24 hours later she was gone... I am so lost... I have a solid group of friends for support and only a brother left, no other family really... I shall watch these videos because they are already helping me. Thank You
@Eric-q3y7c
@Eric-q3y7c 2 күн бұрын
I lost my wife to covid after 52yrs she had a stroke yrs Ago I took care of her she wAs the reason I stayed alive she was thankful and love her life she was doing good then she got covid she suffered bad for a month I watched could not help .my baby I prAyed every night for god to heal her then my life was gone my mom died 3yrs earlier my brother before her then my cousin I am going through it have I done something and I pAying I can't over my wife I had to go on meds to stop me from going crazy and cry all the time I know the rest of my family are tired of me what do I do I can't get out much I hAve got a blood clot in my knee please🎉
@ChitchatwithApril
@ChitchatwithApril Жыл бұрын
Thank you so much for this video. I love your examples. Very helpful.
@brederoux
@brederoux Жыл бұрын
The death of a marriage the death of a family life the death of a sense of self and our roles like being a partner being a mother being a part of a bigger family system catapulted into a life of isolation unless we find our authentic selves and a tribe that will welcome it! #gabormate #trauma #polyvagal #divorce #parental alienation
@margaretwansbrough980
@margaretwansbrough980 8 ай бұрын
Thank you I needed this today.
@TerriHARRIGAN
@TerriHARRIGAN 6 ай бұрын
Brilliant video. Thank you ❤
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