Online Dating Vs Cold Approaching - Which Is Better?

Is online dating better than cold approaching? Which modality of attraction is best for you?
That's actually not as simple as it sounds, for some guys, jumping onto Tinder or Bumble and crafting a really amazing online dating profile is the best way to go - for other guys, it'is worth it to invest time learning to approach and attract women out in the real world.
In this video, I'm going to discuss the pros and cons of different ways of meeting cute girls, whether it's online or out in the real world - This is because I've worked for 13 years as a dating coach, and I've seen exactly what guys experience as they learn to master these different ways of meeting and attracting women.
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School Of Attraction
Dating And Relationship Coach
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Facebook: / schoolofattraction
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[@lewisstroud5399]

Very interesting point of conservation Damien. I think for myself that online dating is the way to go as I'm not too fond of going to bars and clubs (certainly not to meet girls). I feel that with online dating I can invest a lot more time to making myself look more impressive through my profile as well. But there are definitely pros and cons to both methods and I guess factors like previous dating experience, looks, social status and the general area you live in can determine which one you use. Great video as always

[@jamesdillion1]

Good video as always man. I worked with him personally and can say that what he preaches works!

[@SchoolOfAttraction]

Thanks James!

[@johng2706]

Online = less attractive women, more competition, higher flake rate Cold Approach = more attractive women, less competition, lower flake rate VERDICT = if you want the most attractive & highest quality women cold approach is the CLEAR winner

[@SchoolOfAttraction]

Absolutely I agree - and personally I still prefer real life dating by a mile! The difficulty is that the leraning curve to get results - for many guys - is FAR longer for cold approaching. And it's much more difficult emotionally for many guys too. It's a tradeoff

[@ripetika1743]

@@SchoolOfAttraction as long as there is a light at the end of the Super long tunnel, I'll keep getting back up on my feet.

[@trendingfactsofficial1266]

I watched ur tinder video which is 2 hears old. In which u wr saying that if u delete ur tinder gold account and recreate u will get free boost every time. but now I m unable to get my gold subscription back. please help me

[@gamemeister2905]

I'm not sure if you've made a video on this or not because I'm relatively new to the channel, but I have a request. How about a video on dating in college and what to expect going into college in terms of dating? I'll be starting college in August (well, provided it doesn't delay due to the pandemic which it hasn't yet) and such so I need some advice. I've never dated anyone (not for lack of trying) but I'm willing to take the time to figure out my issues and what I've been doing wrong so over the summer I'm probably gonna binge watch a lot of your videos.

[@SchoolOfAttraction]

Nice idea Gamemeister, I haven't made a video on this topic, but it's actually a good one!

[@gamemeister2905]

@@SchoolOfAttraction Cool I'll be looking out for when you make it, if you do. It's a good time for it too since provided things get better, a lot of us will be starting college in a few months.

[@DreamBeatsBakery]

Don't wait for college to start to be social. Put yourself out there now, get a part time job where you have a lot of social interaction. Work out a lot. When ur in college talk to a lot of different people, go to parties, don't get hung up on any one girl too soon and prioritize your studies.

[@gamemeister2905]

@@DreamBeatsBakery Well, it's kinda hard to put myself out there right now what with quarantine and all. I'll be going on vacation for the summer to visit my grandparents soon so I wouldn't really want to get a part time job. As for working out a lot, I definitely can do that much and will. The other stuff when it comes to college is what I plan to do.

[@DreamBeatsBakery]

Haha this is to true I went out with a short Asian friend and he got all the girls like a magnet he was just dancing so funnily and me I didn't even get any looks at all.

[@SchoolOfAttraction]

Lol, yeah it really does happen!

[@Koaske]

I disagree with the statement that Tinder dates would make you meet more women who "aren't your type". I would never go to bar or club without the purpose of trying to pick up a girl, because I don't really enjoy the enviroment and don't see the point of "partying". So, by default, a girl who goes to bars or night clubs is rarely my type. As for day game, I feel like online dating is a lot faster and more convenient, since you don't need to groom yourself and spend hours outside, with no guaranteed results. I'm also much better at creating a good first impression via wriring than by speaking, especially when I have to come up with good stuff on the fly. Despite deliberately practicing improvised conversations, I still find them to be more challenging to me than I'd like. I also like the fact that I can prepare for Tinder dates in advance because I already know something about the girl. It makes it easier to get the conversation flowing when you have a few topics thought out before hand. On top of that, I've noticed that the quality of women I've met online vs in real life seems to be roughly the same, so online dating is definitely my pick.

[@MrDanielWeir]

I’ve had good success with online dating. Since losing my virginity I haven’t been on a date and not ended up sleeping with the person (count is 8). But I’m absolutely terrified of cold approaching. I know for certain that if I went all the way to learning that skill it would be enormously transformative for me. And that’s why I want to do it. And once I have the money I hope I can work with you on it.

[@SchoolOfAttraction]

That would be great Daniel

[@leonardbrkanac9150]

I feel like I’ve peaked in online dating , Ive gotten close but I can never get an 8 to even meet up with me. Good thing I can finally go to bars after corona , I feel like it’s more possible there

[@xMckingwill]

Question what makes you think you deserve an 8 to begin with?? What makes you think you will get an 8 at a bar?

[@rhinowhitino4382]

Chase purpose not pleasure. That's what I feel XMckingwillX is trying to get at with his line of questioning. Online dating, the bar scene and "night game," have too many negatives. Day Game interactions while in pursuit of your purpose is the way to go, this has the highest quality woman, interaction, and personal growth. Also this has the least detraction from your own progress/purpose: the creation of You. This doesn't take one year to develop. This is a lifetime. It never ends. That is what's most beautiful about it. Enjoy the process, separate yourself from the emotions that limit you and move quickly onto the next task, embrace the failure as an opportunity to spot your weaknesses, and with discipline as your driver move towards and thru adversity in your daily process. The biggest fool learns from his own mistakes. Shut off the ego and execute. EXECUTE. Take massive action on the advice you're getting. Pay a mentor, someone who has made the mistakes before, to educate you on the process and hold you accountable to the daily grind. Email me: [e-mail]

[@leonardbrkanac9150]

XMckingwillX true , but no one deserves anything . I just think that I will have a better chance in person because tinder is a complete joke to the hottest women, even most women. But then who knows , I’ve never even been to bar since I just turned 21 so I’ll probably fail miserably at first

[@SchoolOfAttraction]

XMckingwillX I think that's always a fair question to ask yourself - I know nothing about Leonard, he could well be an amazing bloke - But I do know that too frequently guys who have very little to offer as human beings beleive that amazing women should be falling over them.

[@xMckingwill]

@@rhinowhitino4382 lol, thats was a great comment!!

[@simpleguyskills7656]

Great video, Damien. I personally think cold approach is easier to get hotter women. Online can be okay but often seems like too much work these days and women aren't usually "as advertised". 2014 Tinder days are long gone unfortunately .

[@SchoolOfAttraction]

Actually this is a very good point I should have raised - you can definitely get better women offline than online.

[@simpleguyskills7656]

@@SchoolOfAttraction Totally! Looking as good as you can and putting yourself out in public will get you lots of chances each week with hot women. Many women will give "the eyes" and then you just have to move. I still think online can work but it just seems like too much work to get a 6 or 7 or perhaps the odd time an 8 if you get a little luck.

[@rhinowhitino4382]

@@simpleguyskills7656 Fully agree. Online is a waste of time. Use that time to learn a skill. I learned the basics of Spanish while shitting, meanwhile my friends were swipping tinder. Basic spanish got me laid countless times over, to the affect that I met and dated a Chilean celebrity from a Cold Approach day time pickup at the beach (2015) then moved to Chile and lived in South America for several years while becoming, roughly speaking, a renowned dating coach. Then my regular bowel movements allowed me to practice mandarin enough to feel confident moving to China, where I lived for the better part of the last three years. Quit online dating.

[@Superdisco199]

Great comments. I think there are very few pretty (i.e not fat) girls who haven't had options in real life before giving online dating a crack. Hence they've already proved they are picky and discerning (and prob wish to get the best possible guy for their bargening power. Basically they are looking to "Date Up"). If you go to the beach you see that the reality of life is most women actually "date down". Those guys were either already in their circle of trust or had the front to got to know them in real life (or money/power). There are so many dudes in the online queue that we have no bargaining power. Women have the advantage and men become commodifed. The second you say the wrong thing they move on. I've had around 2000 in my beeline this year and it can still be a confidence smasher just to get a 6 or 7 (as said). Have you considered video's on alternate places to meet women ? yoga, book clubs, meet ups etc ?

[@martintheguitarist]

It takes around 5 years to reach some level of competency at playing the guitar, piano, tennis, learning a foreign language. 10 years to reach a high level. So what's surprising about taking a year to get good with women? Any guy who thinks it's too much doesn't deserve anything. Honestly, I think it can take one year only if you work really hard, ie go out three times a week, approach 20 women on each occasion, have a good coach and do constant learning in your spare time.

[@-whackd]

I think because it's faster to dl tinder and bumble and be booking several dates to your house each week, that we got too impatient for daygame and waiting in lines at clubs.

[@rhinowhitino4382]

@@-whackd Online is a waste of time. Use that time to learn a skill. I learned the basics of Spanish while shitting, meanwhile my friends were swipping tinder. Basic spanish got me laid countless times over, to the affect that I met and dated a Chilean celebrity from a Cold Approach day time pickup at the beach (2015) then moved to Chile and lived in South America for several years while becoming, roughly speaking, a renowned dating coach. Then my regular bowel movements allowed me to practice mandarin enough to feel confident moving to China, where I lived for the better part of the last three years. Quit online dating.

[@danielstrack964]

Anyone find it funny that he talks about a 5 foot 8 MMA guys and shows a pic of Stefan Struve who is 7 foot tall...

[@SchoolOfAttraction]

Daniel I'm not familiar with MMA - but the point I was trying to make was still the same - that guy didn't look tall in that MMA photo I found.

[@danielstrack964]

@@SchoolOfAttraction I didn't mean it as a dig on you at all. It was just funny irony that the tallest guy in all of MMA was the pic you choose... Maybe I have a weird sense of humor...

[@danielhlehle1861]

@@danielstrack964 you have not. I found it also very funny :) The tallest guy in the whole UFC. Kind of a really bad example :)

[@-whackd]

3 months to get good at online dating? Haha. Book an appointment with a photographer, get Plus and buy some boosts.

[@SchoolOfAttraction]

The issue with this advice is that I've seen many examples of guys who pay a photographer, get some photos, and none of them are really very good for Tinder - they still don't get good results - This happens more often than it should with a photographer. Many don't know how to actually take good shots. Especially guys who have never hired a photographer before - they find a photographer that claims to do Tinder shots, but the photos end up rubbish. It's not usually as simple as most guys want it to be.

[@-whackd]

@@SchoolOfAttraction Yeah, if they are starting from a really low level and are socially retarded to the extent that they don't know what good pictures look like, then they won't acquire good photos. Most people can test photos on IG or hotornot or something though. They can also ask a few attractive girls to look at their profile photos and rate them. I'm sure you're doing good things with your program, especially for people who need it. Everyone starts somewhere. Some people don't hang out with friends and have zero pictures of themselves in the last 2 years for some reason. Still, they should be able to get some good pictures done in less than 3 months.

[@markn9619]

im socially awkward and have social phobia so neither would work for me unfortunately. tried a million times on dating apps and always get 0’s in my likes, and once i do end up getting a like its usually a fat person.

[@BreakingJJC]

Have you try cold approach in public ? I have better result in cold approach

[@xMckingwill]

Well Online dating is really my only choice. Given other issues I have.

[@antonsaraste4726]

You didn't mention daygame. Bars don't give you enough practice

[@antonsaraste4726]

Oh, you did.

[@SchoolOfAttraction]

I think it largely depends on which bars you go to - I used to go to bars in Sydney you could spend all night approaching and not run out of women..

[@antonsaraste4726]

@@SchoolOfAttraction Haha awesome to hear man. I live in fucking Helsinki lmao

[@kappy_prasad]

Nothing like cold approach like the good old days

[@rhinowhitino4382]

Good old days? you mean before quarantine hahaha

[@roderikputten3412]

Reupload! This video is actually old.

[@SchoolOfAttraction]

It's not a re-upload lol, it's a completely new video - I literally shot it a hour before I released it :P But I did a video with the same name along time ago - but this content is different.

[@Straga_Severa]

You know, there is a very unhealthy part of me - and, I think, many guys like me - which is not satisfied with your MMA analogy. After I hear it, I always remember that there are weight classes in martial sports, and for a good reason. So, even if you are ugly, but train hard, you still will be miles behind a guy who is good-looking and trained as hard as you do. Therefore, it is pointless to try to train hard if you will always be behind. Right?.. Let me tell you a small story. When I was a kid, I loved chess and tried to engage with it as a sport. In Russia, we divide playes below the International Masters by "grades" - four is the lowest and one is the highest. (After that we have a Candidate to Sport Master and Sport Master, and then comes the international classification of IM and GM). So, in my childhood I got a fourth grade, then third, then second... and then plateaued for a few years. I just could not rise above the 2nd grade, I did not manage to win enough tournaments, no matter how much I trained and studied. In the end, I concluded that it is a defect of my mind - I cannot visualize the whole chessboard, I am forced to focus on one flank or another. I cannot play blindfolded chess, my short-term memory is too bad. And I cannot read chess books without assistance of diagrams or a live chess board. This was the reason why I dropped out of chess. Stopped playing it in wny way, except sometimes casually with my father. I had a mindset - "if I cannot be good in it, then there is no reason to try". Fast-forward ten years, when out of boredom I picked a chess book and tried to read it. It was interesting - the fact that I enjoyed learning and improving a bit in my worst area (tactics, sacrifices, combinations and so on). This feeling was really strange to me - I knew that I will never achieve anything worthy in chess, but still - it was cool to know a bit more and play a bit better. And slowly, very slowly, I started to realise that I just enjoy chess - not because I can become a higher-grade player, but just because moving pieces and thinking about which file to open and which pawn to sacrifice is amazing. Did my "disability" go away? No, I still cannot play blindfolded chess, and I still miss my whole-board geometry. But does it mean that learning better chess was a waste of time? No, because it's not a competition for me, and the fact that somebody else will always play better then me does not invalidate the joy I feel when I learn a new opening. So, this "getting better with the girls" stuff does not need to be competitive. Of course, in my heart there is a shy, bullied teenager that wants to "show them all", and simultaniously lamenting on how he will never show anybody anything, because he does not have the required physical attributes. But I learned to comfort him and show that even if he cannot get the brag-worthy title of International Seducing Master, he still can enjoy playing this game - not for the outcome, but for the process. =-)

[@SchoolOfAttraction]

But I think youi missed the point becuase I used an MMA photo rather than something else. A light weight MMA fighter can still destroy a tall weight lifter who isnt' trained in fighting. Meaning he can kick the asses of 95% of men - even though he is small in size. The same applies to real life, you don't need to the be the best with women in teh world, just better than most men around. Which is achievable.

[@Straga_Severa]

@@SchoolOfAttraction Well, the point of my story is that although a lower weight class MMA guy can beat a big weightlifter, he would be unfavoured versus a higher weight class MMA guy. And this is the problem that was bugging me for a long, long time - because I had the "competetive" mindset inside of me, "If I never will beat a guy who is good looking and also learns and trains as hard as me, then it is futile to try to learn this stuff". And my story shows the methaphor that I used to calm this insecurity =-) The fact that I'm better than 98.3% of people on my favourite chess platform does not calm my insecurity, because I'm still only 1700 rated. What helps me is to think about the joy of learning new stuff in chess, trying it, failing and succeeding, insread of thinking about the fact that I'm not even 2000. So the fact that I will never be as good as a person who has both the looks and the hard work hurts me, but when I remind myself this is not a competition, and I will have fun going on this road even if I will not have the brag-worthy results, it stops hurting =-)

[@TheEugeneBlond]

Didnt watch. let me guess... it both have strong sides... bla bla bla

[@SchoolOfAttraction]

No, I actually slowly undress miss russia while she eats hawaiian pizza and I toot the australian athem via an ass mounted kazoo - But you missed out on it all because you didn't watch :P

[@Straga_Severa]

@@SchoolOfAttraction Damn you, Australians, always taking our girls from us! ;-)

[@TheEugeneBlond]

@@SchoolOfAttraction funny enough) btw good video)

[@TheEugeneBlond]

@@Straga_Severa это не они наших, а наши их, ахах

[@kc270352]

both are a waste of time unless your an attractive male model 🤙👍

[@exnihilonihilfit6316]

loser

[@rhinowhitino4382]

Online is a waste of time. Use that time to learn a skill. I learned the basics of Spanish while shitting, meanwhile my friends were swipping tinder. Basic spanish got me laid countless times over, to the affect that I met and dated a Chilean celebrity from a Cold Approach day time pickup at the beach (2015) then moved to Chile and lived in South America for several years while becoming, roughly speaking, a renowned dating coach. Then my regular bowel movements allowed me to practice mandarin enough to feel confident moving to China, where I lived for the better part of the last three years. Quit online dating.

[@Mr.Josh.]

Rhino Whitino Girls are easier to pick up in South America because they have different mentalities, cultures and morals. Whereas, in the USA women have been raised with a materialistic mentality with picky attitudes. I lived in Argentina for 10 years and got 8's 9's and 10's that I would never ever in my life get in the USA. How was your experience in Chile? Also, how's China man?