OPINIONATED | Communication between hubby and baby mamma must be controlled by the wife.

[@hlengiwemathenjwa1371]

For me this boils all down to maturity she has a right as a wife to be part of the financial issues with regards to her household, and if both parties meaning the wife and the Baby Mama are matured and not insecure. Baby Mama wouldn't have a problem to communicate with someone who is surrounded by her children and is a female and secondly even if Baby Mama and Baby Daddy choses to have a direct healthy co-parenting you as the Wife should not have a problem because you trust your husband and know he can be man enough to understand the responsibility he has without being followed after.

[@zandilengobeni320]

Nna I don’t see a problem with them buying, ah nna my baby daddy buys the clothes. Gore who chose or what, I don’t care

[@keneiloeTshabalala]

I didn't care until the gal friend herself called and ask for the sizes iyoo it didn't sit well with me but later I came into my senses. And called the baby daddy that when him and his gal friend when they buy kids clothes he must communicate with me not the gal friend

[@moe_ramz]

@@keneiloeTshabalala You’re being weird. You still have feelings for him.

[@LEBOGANGLEBIAMOKONYANE]

​@@moe_ramzit doesn't matter the feeling mna no woman will buy my child clothes.

[@Dani_Nwedie]

That's because you're over him and you're a good mother thinking of her children.

[@RebeccaMokoena-j3l]

Happy to see you sagwi ❤ As a wife: I don't have time for the size of others people kids, I was not part of those child in the beginning. As a baby mama: nooooo I don't play that game with my kids size, the father must open account for his kids finish.

[@SagwieRabs]

Finally my people have arrived ❤ thank you. I like how you put it,really every mother to her child/children

[@manokotau1088]

Yes please 🫸🏼🫷🏾

[@GrannyRamela]

Yooooo what a sensitive and touching topic. I think it all depends on the kind of relationship with baby daddy and maturity . I'm lucky to say I have both experience bcs I have 2 different baby daddies. 1st baby daddy is married and the wife is the sweetest , we have a good relationship. She love my child whole heartedly. My child has been staying with daddy and step mommy since he was 8, now he's doing 1st year . 2nd baby daddy , yoooo ke mathata. The daddy sends me money then I do for my child. I don't have a relationship with her girlfriend,

[@phamzalee5025]

Funny how most women feel offended when the wife wants to be involved, but when she steps back when the father doesn't maintain the baby they call her names. So she can only be involved when she's fighting babymama's battles.

[@Life-b01]

@@phamzalee5025 the involvement is required only when it benefits them😂😂.

[@pheladitau6762]

Di babymama di bitter hle

[@lungilembuyisa8566]

Uyajabula we Lerato. Mina nje ngikhuluma nowangizalisa period!

[@busisiwemichelle5391]

When she said l can still have another baby with your husband it shows that baby mama's are disrepectull and why do want the wife to welcome you with both hands and trust you around their family because clearly you still want to destroy it while she is trying to keep it together that's my take so these 2 can never be In Harmony because the other wants to keep it together the other want to keep it together thus my take

[@SagwieRabs]

We don't want to be welcomed,don't trust us. Wena focus on your kids and husband, nna le your husband we focus on the kids we made together. Simple

[@busisiwemichelle5391]

I understand but l was talking based on the lady statement right it can work work out if both parties play their roll with clear communication and understanding and respect is there from both parties

[@SagwieRabs]

@busisiwemichelle5391 can I ask this: why do wives feel the need to be involved with another woman's kids? Also why do they want to be respected by baby mama?what do they owe wives?

[@portiazulu8352]

Believe you me, baby mamas are not disrespectful. They only pose as disrespectful becoz wives want to be difficult people thus the attitude to prove to u, u cnt control us or rather keep ur controlling parameters to ur hubby and not me. We r not related please

[@thatohope9223]

​@SagwieRabs if your baby daddy is married, the wife will be involved in your kid's lives unless you are going to stop them from seeing or having relationship with their father.

[@GrannyRamela]

oooohhhh it was nice seeing you ko Peter Mokaba, we even took a video. Topic suggestion related to baby daddies. How do u feel when u have 2 different baby daddies. 1st baby daddy is well off , taking good care of his child , the child goes to Curro . daddy buying Nikes and Jordan , 2nd baby daddy is struggling financially and the baby goes to a public school and doesn't have Nikes. Both kids are staying with mommy

[@thandiswabusakwe4665]

Ey 😢

[@glorylatakgomo2058]

this is why i always say to cut this nonsense..work and empower yourself send the bill to the other party to send your half even if he doesn't coolies leave it...

[@wisanimaluleke8508]

i refuse to be a gate, i lets my husband do as he wish with his kids and the baby mama

[@SagwieRabs]

❤

[@K.amogelo]

Lerato is delusional 😭😭😂😂 I can't with her.

[@Life-b01]

Fun fact: Couples married in COP, do you know that should the husband lose his job , the wife is liable for maintaining the same children that yall are using to fight your ex partners? Its time women accept that some women out there have motherly love and have no bad intentions towards their kids. We are so far behind as the black community . We dont see healthy co parenting set ups/ blended families.

[@SagwieRabs]

Let me guess the women love our kids as their own?😂😂 Kahleni😂 The fun fact is what wives should look into when getting married. THE MAINTENANCE IS A DEBT. Therefore, THE JOINT ESTATE must pay it. We cannot be held prisoner to a wife's decision to join the estate,they signed up for that and my kids have nothing to do with them joining the estate. Consequently THE JOINT ESTATE will pay the maintenance, let's not act like the wives are doing us baby mama's a favour, we did not ask for it mus😊

[@Life-b01]

@SagwieRabs wena you are just angry😂. Weii kwatetse in life . I however hope you heal because clearly this topic touched a wound that has not healed . Love and Light my sister😂😂.

[@SagwieRabs]

@Life-b01 Thank you, I represent well 🙌 💓. As long as 2 biological parents are alive, then mind your own, even if he doesn't support the kids. You don't have to play Jesus ,nna as angry baby mama I will deal naye hubby wakho. Wena, focus on your marriage and kids 🤣 Love and light, my dear, welcome to OPINIONATED 😁❤️

[@kgosigadijoy]

Not many actually think like you. Most like to start being a nuisance to the wife who was minding her own business when the baby daddy starts neglecting his responsibilities. ​@@SagwieRabs

[@SagwieRabs]

@kgosigadijoy my dear. Maybe we need to discuss COP because you guys don't understand that maintenance is a debt. So if the debt goes unpaid, the baby mama can go after the JOINT estate..it's not against the wife but the estate.

[@portiazulu8352]

😂😂😂 chuck norris killed me

[@emelisa2384]

I don't see the problem with wives asking sizes/buying clothes unless baby mama have other agendas with the baby dad's

[@SagwieRabs]

Let me try not to be "bitter" I am so involved with my kids, and I know their favorite cartoons. Just like preparing them for school, it's important to me to take my kids and shop with, for them. Yes, some of you don't care. I am 30, and I still remember when my mom used to take us to jet night of stars to get clothes, we picked ourselves. Once we were sent with a relative, we refused to buy we were 5 to 7 years old, and we had to wait for MOM to get there. I know the feeling, and I still remember it to this day😊😊. I am not against people raising their kids hard-core..do as you wish it's your kid and it's just "clothes"

[@juniorlimpho1839]

Maintenance agreement says the father can buy the clothes June(Winter) and December(Festive) nor mandatorily giving MONEY, meaning the Father can also have a right to buy and bring clothes for the kids. Baby Mama's must know that Father's can also buy clothes in our absence not that we always want to be part or buy for the kids. Baby Mama's also becomes bitter by assuming that it will be the lady involved with the Father being the one choosing clothes for the kids.

[@SagwieRabs]

Lapho baby daddy doesn't even know what kids like cuz he had to be forced to maintain even😂

[@zandilenkelemabena3185]

You can buy my kids clothes, as long as you know my choice of dressing them. They visit thru out the year, by November you should know which style I like for them.

[@zesandenomgca7852]

Mna i worry about my kids only, abanye andizi andingeni ndawo.

[@SagwieRabs]

Danko

[@wisanimaluleke8508]

me and you the same

[@MadamTMT]

Yaaaaay,

[@katlegorapatsa7035]

My dad used to ask for sizes whenever I ask for clothes.He will buy the clothes then I take the slip to exchange.

[@SagwieRabs]

So much hardwork 😮

[@mphomokoena7168]

The fact he married this lady and not you shows volumes because she is the legal wife that has a surname you don't have...so the kids are now joined with the new women that's the reality she has a say in everything in house

[@kgosigadijoy]

Dankie

[@dineoledwaba8936]

Hi Madam Speaker, it was nice to see you ko Peter Mokaba's stadium last Saturday

[@Life-b01]

The lady sitting next to Madam Speaker is childish and bitter😂😂😂

[@thabylumkwana444]

too much

[@SagwieRabs]

She needs a psychologist, neh?😂😂😂 When it comes to my kids, I am everything. Call it as it may be,every grown-up,mature woman to their child tu.

[@tebogomaphefomodiba4232]

The peace my baby daddy has for having me as a baby mama is immeasurable. He's having it soft. I stay away shem. 🤞🏾

[@kananelomohlalisi4049]

The problem is that people don't respect the institution of marriage and baby mamas seem bitter. You don't own your ex just because you have children with them, the wife and the husband are ONE and they have a right to decide how to be approached by you because they are a family not YOU. As long as your child is being well taken care of, you don't decide whom you should be in contact with in that family.

[@SagwieRabs]

Haibo How is it the business of a baby mama to respect the institution of marriage between you and your husband? Wa bona as long as my child comes from my womb,No woman is going to tell me what to do. Even in maintenance court,the BIOLOGICAL parents convene and talk hayi wife. Wena wife focuses on your husband and KIDS. When you get married in of community of property, the children do not form part of the property unless legally adopted. Stop trying to please husbands using our kids,thina with our bitterness, we will communicate with the person who impregnated us hayi wena.

[@zesandenomgca7852]

​@@SagwieRabsWives are very insecure, they always want to stick their nose in other people's business's. I don't know where they get the time really to worry about their kids and my kids..yooh

[@Lkay915]

Well said.👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

[@thapelolengana]

If I don't trust my wife to be disciplined in the ways she would deal with the ex where children are involved. Other than that there is point of being with her I I don't trust she can be disciplined in all aspects. Unless if I am totally insecure to an extent that I want to control how she communicates

[@buyisileradebe8108]

I'm happy to see Sagwi❤

[@SagwieRabs]

Finally we meet ❤

[@buyisileradebe8108]

My Sister ❤️❤️

[@bontlemartha1670]

Can we have Part 2 please this is so interesting 😂😂😂😂😂

[@zesandenomgca7852]

I don't understand why the wives can't focus only in their children. I was impregnated by your husband not you but you see the need to involve yourself in our business. You got married to him knowing we have kids, and we are co-parenting very well together, there is no need for the 3rd person. Wives know your place, and also let me as baby mama stay in my lane.

[@SagwieRabs]

Thank you

[@mphotoniamosotho3545]

I'm sorry but Lerato is too immature for this conversation. Her wife/main chick point of view is super floored.

[@Vv-fl2rm]

You never find men concerned about such 😂😂😂 it’s always the women wanting to control such dynamics. You find a man with a baby mama and kids outside and you shift to security gaurd mode. You can never stop him from sleeping with his baby mama Sis if that’s what he wants. That’s the unfortunate part.

[@SagwieRabs]

Heyi

[@kgosigadijoy]

Why Lele so focused on the fact that y'all can still sleep with the man?says a lot about what you actually want

[@SagwieRabs]

@kgosigadijoy 🤣my sister as long as ngwana ale shap

[@Vv-fl2rm]

@@kgosigadijoy it’s the men themselves that leave you in the house like a stupid clown to go and convince his baby mama to sleep with him sisi. You can never be a man’s security gaurd watching over where he sticks his things and trying to micro manage communication between him and the mother of his child.

[@lungilembuyisa8566]

Awamanje amadoda ayazi controllable ama finances awo

[@mpumemaphumulo5725]

And the fights course traumatic experiences for the kids and they eventually have to take sides but they need both parents.

[@zelokuhlegina5886]

Let me call for sizes right now😂😂

[@SagwieRabs]

😂😂

[@MsNeliBings-i2w]

I think accepting bought clothes will depend on the relationship I can’t trust Jst anyone to buy my baby clothes they can Jst give me the money they were going to spend

[@sibongisenisakhele3114]

Not Chuck Norris! LOL!

[@refilwemasipa3857]

Sometimes communication between the mothers is merely about the wellbeing of the kids. Remember the kids when they visit, they are most times with the woman and opening that communication line is for the kids. Think people like myself should have been part of this 🤪

[@SagwieRabs]

Wellbeing ya ngwana wa mang fifi?

[@Nellynkosi03]

Stick to the maintenance order. If it says my husband must buy clothes that's exactly what will happen (without you being there as the baby mama). If the order says he must give you money for clothes that's exactly what is going to happen he will not be there for buying. I am not even going to insert myself mina, too much admin shem Boundaries create good relationships

[@SagwieRabs]

😂Only insecure wives do this,send the baby mama money for the clothes. She will go buy alone with the kids, wena guard your husband. 😂😂😂 On the other hand, as a best wife we give you kids December and go live our best lives, wena keep trying to be the best wife😂.

[@kgosigadijoy]

​@@SagwieRabslol nna motho gaa tlisa bana o ba tlisa ko papa bona🙃

[@SagwieRabs]

@kgosigadijoy it's giving Kamo...wena mind your kids and husband. Mina I mind my kids and baby daddy Everyone stay in their place.

[@RoseMasilela-i8b]

The challenge will be a fashion taste, anless if it's similar to mine, they she can buy

[@lauraneramalida234]

Exactly some people's fashion sense sucks

[@refilwemasipa3857]

I think step parenting isn’t for everyone. Do what works. It is also important to put differences aside and put the wellbeing of the kids first. Perseverance made a good point about researching the babymama first before dating a dad 😅

[@SagwieRabs]

Hao fifi wellbeing of a child includes throwing clothes that kids don't even like at them or what baby mama must take slips and exchange? Why is it hard for wives to focus on their husband's and own kids? Le impress banna to the extent of being a babysitter ka December,monna aye di out Abe a hlakane Le yena baby mama 😂😂. Wena Oke tirile master of mbokoding,security guard and baby sitter? What's forcing you to be in the business of another woman's kids?

[@hellenkgole8134]

Hy mina I allow that last year hey jikijiki happy family pictures where share haibo sifike nini lapho😢😢

[@lutendomakhokha1562]

My favorite person

[@juniorlimpho1839]

I agree with Lerato with some few points. I am not becoming Chuck Norris and He's not afraid to speak for himself... You guys have broken up for some reasons and the reason i have to be a middle person regarding the communication and finance is because it was never build before i came in or EVEN before we become serious. Foundation built from co-parenting ALWAYS matters.

[@SagwieRabs]

So wena your the one il get along with Ujeso uthi phumani endabeni za bazali

[@lesegompshe2871]

Can we please see Lerato... we really ❤ her

[@charmainemabowa]

Please😂

[@Hlangothi25]

I always love your views lerato; but you missed this one. This time your opinion comes from a place of fear/insecurity, the threat of the baby mama. With the same breath you believe it's ok for you to contact your baby daddy (an ex) if you have such a situation. That's double standard my love❤

[@lungilembuyisa8566]

Bese esehlukeneke u Larato no nayo leyondoda sekumele ngkhulume nomunyu futhi neverrrr

[@gwendolinebooysen3893]

This topic is not done🙆‍♀️it have to continue Madam Speaker

[@No2HeartStoppingClotShots]

Ay 😂 if a baby mama is alive, phuma nje ko baby daddies 😂😂😂 ungaqali nokuqala.. After what Lerato said😂😂😂😮 iyho

[@SibsM93]

That's why I will NEVER date a baby daddy. I know I have insecurities, I'll never have peace.

[@zinhlerebecca1109]

Mina I don’t have time for other people’s kids 😑

[@XoliswaGayiza]

The child belongs with her/his mother and father (happened to be your husband) as it is the case in your case as a wife

[@elsiemaluleke2479]

Imagine indoda have 3 different baby MoMA's. This topic

[@lungilethusi9862]

😂😂😂😂😂re batla thee size for the kids

[@Hadassah-mb7]

Send photos for them to know each other,thats it,my children and the wife children will never meet

[@SagwieRabs]

😂😂yass girl

[@hlengiwemathenjwa1371]

Babe It sounds like there's a underlying issue I so get you if it's his girlfriend they don't have to meet my kids but if it's a Wife you need to accept your baby daddy chose the Wife.

[@Hadassah-mb7]

@hlengiwemathenjwa1371 i accepted,but the children dont need to meet am happy, his happy i think, the wife needs to stay far away from me and my children, periode

[@hlengiwemathenjwa1371]

@@Hadassah-mb7 I hear you sweets

[@thatohope9223]

​@Hadassah-mb7 so your children will not visit their father ?how will their father see them or spend time with them?

[@johannahmatheba]

I think to have peace the father should just send the kids money for the kids clothes to avoid nonsense

[@thembileluthuli1154]

Some baby mamas are crazy bazalwane

[@SagwieRabs]

How?

[@tumeloshakale8260]

Lorato s voice ekare Promise Makunyane

[@SagwieRabs]

😂😂😂

[@lungilethusi9862]

😂😂😂😂on my side my husband won't community with her baby mama, i did give it a change but the results was another child so no no no please c*s can i get the size i want to buy clothes for the kids😅😅😅😅😅😅😅 i don't play with my men chiii.

[@kgosigadijoy]

If you date or marry a baby father, date a strict man of order n u won't have problems shem

[@nefefefulu9760]

Does this apply to babe fathers are husband allowed to call fathers and give them size of kids he is staying with

[@Hadassah-mb7]

My children have enough love from me,and my family, they dont need the wife's love no

[@morongwabapela6524]

You sound bitter

[@SagwieRabs]

Dankie❤

[@lutendomakhokha1562]

As for me yu can have as many kids as yu want i dont care baby mama must communicate with the dady dats on period

[@Success_Masondo]

Nah, let the parents take care of their children. Man are not children people they can communicate really well with the mother of their kids if they want. Otherwise the layby thing works if that fails he must open an account in his name, I will go myself and get my child his clothes. Lena la loya🚮😂😂😂😂. You can never trust anyone with your children.

[@NdzaloNkuna-i9q]

I say woza December guys.

[@SagwieRabs]

😂😂😂

[@boitumeloleballo2744]

Madam speaker the focus is thr child not about parents ai children suffer because of such things. You also expect the wife to love the child while your being difficult. How?

[@SagwieRabs]

I expect the wife to love her own kids and leave mine alone ❤

[@Mmeboroko]

How can the wife leave your kids alone though if sometimes they visit the father and she needs to take care of both her kids and yours without favouritism. So the kids don’t feel like they not welcome in their father’s home

[@SagwieRabs]

@julietteboroko5507 they don't have to go there if it means she must tell em what to do with my kids or the co- parenting between me and her husband.

[@Mmeboroko]

@@SagwieRabs I understand what you saying but also it will be difficult for the father to support the kids without being able to spend time with them. I think the wife should not change how things were being done but there must still be some kind of communication between the baby mama and wife so the baby mama is also comfortable about the person her kids is around when visiting the father.

[@SagwieRabs]

@julietteboroko5507 sesi ...he can see the kids they can meet mus please let's stop acting like all wives are English

[@Life-b01]

But how do we.stay away from baby daddies when its hard to find people without kids now? Aowa yall are angry and bitter askies😂😂😂

[@SagwieRabs]

😂😂😂reno anger

[@5thdimensio284]

A turn there are many men without kids

[@cece_pride]

😂 eish

[@teekay543]

It is sad that black women are poor to an extent that they cannot afford to buy a few outfits for their children to wear. Black women are still poor. It is sad.

[@SibsM93]

Ai your comment took a short left 😂. Are you watching and listening to the same podcast as the rest of us?

[@SagwieRabs]

Lol my ccta kids are for 2 people, so even if am millionaire I am not going to pay 100 percent for my kids while the other parent goes on vacation. This thing of 💯 alone is the reason why people can't even buy themselves sunscreen..soze

[@SagwieRabs]

​@@SibsM93heyi

[@Hlangothi25]

Are you saying kids need money & not fathers ( both parents)? Are you saying fathers can be excused from parenting if baby mama is rich/affording?😢

[@SagwieRabs]

@@Hlangothi25 Please read my comment attentively😞🙌 Read!

[@bhekiwemkhaliphi115]

I don't like kids, especially somebody else's kid si andzingeni