P's Nursery Journey #2 | Phoebe & Me

[@ruthcollett399]

I took my son to a couple of play groups but he was so shy and would just cry. He’s now at school and very confident with no tears when he started school. It will get easier doesn’t help with the guilt though. May be she is just a little shy to ask, a few weeks and she will be excited to go. Sending hugs xx

[@JVCxo]

Aww yay, thats so good bless him. She is really shy but once she gets used to it I'm sure she'll be fine! xxx

[@aaamyosaurus]

This brings back some memories! Some children march into nursery on their first day like they’ve been there their entire lives, and others don’t. I know exactly how awkward you feel when your child is the only one sobbing. She does sound like she’s settling in completely normally though, poo accident and all. I bet in a month all these tears and the worry and the guilt will be a distant memory. Just keep up with the positivity when you talk to her about school and when she mentions how much she’ll miss you, acknowledge it but then change the subject to you asking her to draw a special picture, or can she remember what Peppa Pig’s little brother is called etc. I also remember being told that some children are worried about missing out on fun stuff at home, so perhaps tell her about all the boring housework you have to do. Fingers crossed this week is going better for you both.

[@JVCxo]

Thanks so much! Today was a good day so fingers crossed it lasts! 🙌🏻😘 xxx

[@leahburns8184]

I work in a nurser, this journey is so intesting from a parents point of view as we only see if from the child’s. and I can reassure you that all her behaviours are completely normal! For a child who has gone from being at home every day to being at nursery, she is doing just fine! Also with the illness thing, i know it’s annoying but it’s our polices that if they have even a slight temperature we have to send them home due to cross contamination of illnesses 😭 I feel so bad for the parents to have to leave work but we have to do it it’s apparently in the government guidelines! Xxxx

[@JVCxo]

Thanks so much, this comment really means alot. Luckily I'm not working in the week so doesn't effect my wages! I had no clue there were guidelines haha, but atleast now I know! :) xxx

[@ameliabelle9722]

Hi Jess thanks for sharing yours and P's nursery journey so far. I have four children from 8 years old down to 15 months and i can honestly say how a child settles into nursery is down to the child's personality. please do not feel you are at fault. You probably will go through hell for the first few weeks as P adjusts to her new routine. I think when P does make a friend or two it really will make a difference to her confidence at school. Keep doing what you are doing by constantly communicating with the staff so they are aware of P's anxieties. One of my children is a lot like P and he is now nearly 7 and still a little nightmare lol i think i read somewhere about a syndrome where some children are hyper sensitive. For example two children can fall over ... yet one of those children will cry for a whole day over it and the other just strugs it off within 10 minutes. If you can eventually make friends with some of the mums at the school and arrange a play date that will really help P become familiar with the children in her class. Looking forward to the next update x

[@JVCxo]

Thanks so much lovely. It was really hard but starting to get a little easier. I really want her to make friends but drop off/pick up is so quick there isn't really much chance to chat, everyone is just busy with their little ones! Thanks for your comment & watching! xxx

[@daisyduckerella3041]

Aww Jess, I just want to give you a cuddle. I was here with my first child and it’s so so hard. But my second, third and fourth just ran in and never looked back! My second actually hid when I went to pick her up! I know this is an old video so I’m so glad P has settled and is happy at nursery now. You’re such a good mum x

[@JVCxo]

Thanks lovely, it was so hard to begin with but so happy with how it all turned out in the long run! xxx

[@mariewilliams265]

Omg how was it when she was talking to her daddy and he said thank you and she said "your welcome" bless her 💕

[@JVCxo]

She's so sweet haha! xxx

[@RosietheGirls]

Watching two years later as doing through it now! Xx

[@katiereynolds7059]

Aw jess it made me sad seeing you cry, bless you. I know we tell you all the time but you're doing an amazing job! P will get there I promise xx

[@JVCxo]

Thanks for always being there lovely!

[@Hollyjollychristmas7]

You are doing a fantastic job. Hang on in there. P is a gorgeous little girl who is clearly well loved and I’m sure everything will get so much better with time and she will get used to the new routine it must just be such a change for her, and you of course 💗

[@JVCxo]

Thanks so much lovely!

[@loulou3473]

The preschool my little girl is at wanted her to do the full 3 hour session when she first started and I was worried at first as she had never been left with anyone ever. She got a bit upset but after the first week she took to it so well and now loves it

[@JVCxo]

It's so hard isn't it, you can explain it to them but they don't understand until they go through it! xxx

[@Sarah__H]

I totally get you. I remember thinking it was going to be amazing and wasn’t prepared for how hard it is at the start. It’s such a transition for us as mums as well as children. x

[@JVCxo]

Its so hard, I definitely wasn't prepared for it at all! :( xxx

[@rachelsearcy4952]

Yay couldn't wait for this video been a long weekend waiting for it and get well soon ❤️ xx

[@JVCxo]

Thanks so much

[@deborahr2236]

I really felt for you 😢 it’s such a huge transition for P and every child is different, I was terrible at going to school my mum use to cry walking home because I was so sad, but it got better and as they say time is a great healer. I absolutely hated leaving my mum but you do adjust, it’s very early days for you both. Be kind to yourself. ❤️❤️

[@JVCxo]

Awful isn't it, poor things. But once they are used to it they have fun, she always says how she loves playing with playdoh because we don't get it out at home hahaha! xxx

[@laurengray9981]

Hi Jess, I hope she is settling in a bit more. I found it such a struggle to start with as my little one kept getting pushed around & hit when she was trying to make friends which upset her. So I just cried & felt so guilty as you just want to protect them & make it good time before proper school comes. My little one goes 4 half days. Don’t ever feel like it is your fault. Parenting is such hard work especially times like this. Sending love. Xxx Sorry it’s long lol.

[@JVCxo]

Oh no thats awful, that would upset me too! At home they live in this little bubble don't they, other children can be so brash, & especially as P is so small and delicate. God it breaks my heart! xxx

[@emmachandler2178]

Love her haul x lol x yes kids r crafty when it comes to school I remember it well

[@JVCxo]

Thanks lovely, yep they are so cheeky! xxx

[@jenna-leachapman6403]

Your both doing amazing,Well done P for being so brave ❤ It is really hard getting used to them starting school,My sons have always been shy whilst my daughter isnt so much.but their confidence grows throughout the year as they become more comfortable like im sure P will too in her own time,My youngest boy struggles with starting new classes each year so i have a re run yearly of him not wanting to go every morning and hes now in year 1 yet comes out all happy!Try not to stress and worry,So many children in the early years have accidents at school,Once we go they perk up alot quicker than we think aswell.Makesure you talk to the teachers about any worries you have.P will be running off into class before you know it as early years at school is a big part of their social development xx

[@JVCxo]

Thanks so much lovely. God its so hard for all of us isn't it, children and bubbas. I hope that time comes soon haha, at the moment I have to peel her off me! xxx

[@donnarandall1763]

I think p would be better doing 5 mornings rather than 2 full days that way they get used to going daily x

[@loulou3473]

Donna Randall I did that with my 3 year old helps them settle quicker as they are not having big gaps in between each session

[@Sugababe21]

That’s a great idea! It really Sadie’s help break the cycle x

[@JVCxo]

The sessions she has is what she has I think! But going to gradually see how we go after half term to increase to all day! xxx

[@sandraw3163]

My husband and I were childminders for 13 years.So we had around 8 children a day,different ages different times of day.I found that the children who came in everyday settled better than the ones who came once or twice a week.They looked forward to seeing their 'friends' each time.Once P gets it in her mind that you are coming back for her she will be fine,also when she makes a little friend that will help.You're doing so well.xx

[@JVCxo]

When I did the settling in sessions, I tried to get P to make some friends, not too sure if that still happens when I'm not there, if they are just left too it but we shall see! :) xxx

[@roxanne8275]

Oh hun! I was so emotional when my son started nursery he struggled so much an took months to settle him in. It broke me everytime, it gets easier trust me he's now in reception an loves it.. I've gotta do it all over again with my youngest arggh😔 lots of love xxxxx

[@JVCxo]

Good luck for doing it again! She's staying for lunch tomorrow, so hoping she gets on well with that! xxx

[@meganpocklington6443]

I cried so much watching you cry. As a mummy myself I can relate so much to what you were saying and I could see how distressed you were. I hope this brings some comfort to you but my little girl was exactly the same as P. She had to be dragged off me by nursery staff as she would cling on to me. She cried every single time she was dropped off for about 6 weeks and then she actually got to the point where she enjoyed going. My partner works a week of nights and a week of days and at the beginning when she hated going he started to drop her off one week and I would the next. The staff did say that she was a lot worse and more emotional when I dropped her off as appose to daddy. Maybe it’s because she knows I’m softer so she was playing on that. Anyway all I’m trying to say is i know how hard it is in the beginning, it’s so new and alien to them. But once they get used to it P will probably actually enjoy going like my little girl did, eventually. I know how heartbreaking and frustrating it is, but it’s for there own good! You’ve got this 😘 xx

[@JVCxo]

Thanks so much for your message. Thats what it's like at the moment, having to tear P off like a leach and pass her to another teacher :( She does enjoy it, she comes out singing songs, telling me what she does, its just that bye moment, & now getting her dressed hahaa! xxx

[@marikatiernan1856]

This video broke my heart. Don’t doubt yourself. You are doing your best and always did your best for p. There is no rhyme or reason to kids sometimes and some days you just have to keep breathing in and out. She will get there in the end and so will you. I found that a quick drop off was easier for my child and I just accepted that she would cry and yes it was sad for me but my child was grand and often didn’t want to leave at collection time. Just follow your instinct and all will be good. Best of luck xxx

[@JVCxo]

Thankyou so much

[@alisona8732]

She is definitely getting there. She just needs to take baby steps. You’re both doing great xx

[@JVCxo]

Thankyou, lunch for the first time tomorrow, shes excited! xx

[@zalbahrani91]

My son is autistic and has a speech delay so I had a lot of anxiety when he started nursery last year because I knew he wouldn't understand what was going on. I can completely relate to how you feel about them having trouble settling in. He would cry non stop from the moment we left home. He just knew that we were going to nursery and he would kick off. It hurt so much watching him like that and as soon as I dropped him off I would cry all the way home. Two things really helped: making the drop off really quick so just a quick hug and 'mummy will see you later' and then walking away and also increasing the time gradually. We did an hour the first week and then moved it to 1.5 hours and so on until we got to 3 hours. It took a while but honestly he went from the child who cried his eyes out to the child who literally ran to nursery because he was so excited. Doing more half days every day also really helps because they have that consistency. I also noticed they have trouble settling in after half terms and holidays but don't let that upset you they adjust quickly. Its all a pretty shit process and a learning curve for both child and parent but they just have to learn to be away from us for a few hours. I remember speaking to another mum whose son was also having trouble settling in my sons class and I asked her "do you get upset?" and she bluntly said "no" 😂

[@JVCxo]

Yep we are putting those tips into action at the moment. Quick drop offs are easier, and gradually increasing time. Tomorrow she's having lunch there for the first time, so hopefully that goes well for her. I'm worried about half term as it will ruin the routine but will keep talking about school with her during that time! Hahah I agree it's a really shit and lonely time but we are getting there! xxx

[@ChloeW-qi6kp]

My little girl has started school now and she does 2 hours every morning so they get used to going every day. See if you can ask for just mornings to settle her in :)

[@JVCxo]

She is currently just doing her full day as a half morning sesh, seems to be working so far. Introducing lunches as of tomorrow and then will try to increase time after half term! :) eeeek! xxx

[@zonn8300]

Oh bless you both ❤ this was hard to watch brings back all the emotions. My boy was much the same and also had a few accidents but now he barely says goodbye. I find it strange that the school isn't pushing the longer hours they see this all the time im sure all kids are like this at first. Has everything settled now? It's hard but stay strong and enjoy your time off!!

[@JVCxo]

I know, I thought they would be too but I guess they didn't want to push her the other way and make her really hate it when she's sensitive already?! We are going to gradually increase to all day after the half term, shes staying for lunch today for the first time,so will see how that goes! xxx

[@tpears6934]

Ah bless you as I mentioned in your first nursery video my granddaughter did this for 18months every day. When she went into reception class never cried even though full days! You’re doing everything right so don’t worry about that and P will be fine you know her best and I’m sure the teachers will guide her to something if she’s ever on her own for too long unless she’s happy playing at the time so please don’t worry. The teachers knew me and still do now at the school because my granddaughter was the only one who cried every day especially after a few weeks but she was totally fine by the time she came home at dinner time every day! And she had an older sister in the same school so go figure haha. X

[@JVCxo]

Thanks so much, P is the same, still cries every time but they say after 5 mins shes absolutely fine. They just like making you feel guilty! xxx

[@tpears6934]

They certainly know how to work you up haha I used to spend the 3 hours worrying while she was in there and when she came out she’d be fine !

[@madisonrose3368]

Thank you for sharing this journey! Horrible seeing you cry... it must be so hard. I’m dreading my little one starting nursery/pre-school next year. Have you thought about taking her to any out of school activities or playgroups to help her socialise a bit more and with you there hopefully that will help her grow her confidence around other children? Not every child is naturally confident & that’s okay. You’re doing a great job... 💕

[@JVCxo]

Yeah she isn't very confident, but she's getting there. I need to see if there are any things she can do at school so she can see other children, not too sure if they do have anything! xxx

[@conniegroves86]

Aww jess dont blame yourself at all your doing amazing job with p.. as parents we all go through this with our babies starting school.. ny daughters friend wouldn't do nursery she just cried all the time but come reception she was fine..please don't worry yourself p is an amazing little girl and im sure she will get there soon😊xx

[@JVCxo]

Thanks so much

[@Wendyboymama]

Love her showing the camera all her kitchen bits bless her.. Pro vlogger in the making ❤️

[@JVCxo]

Thanks lovely! xxx

[@marieharvey3910]

Thank you for your reply honey, I've only came across you this past week and I think your doing amazing and phoebe is a lovely well balanced little girl taking a huge step in life but also knows her mummy will always be there for her, think you need a mummy hug honey, so sending you a huge one xxx take care honey x

[@JVCxo]

Aww thankyou very much, & thanks for joining the channel!

[@furryfurryfriends]

Don’t stress yourself too much, taking her to Playgroup’s from a young age probably would have helped her confidence and her being able to socialise but perhaps not either maybe she would have been timid regardless, she will get there it will be a huge change for her especially if she’s never been in an environment like that or around lots of other kids. Keep trying she will get there soon xx

[@JVCxo]

Yeah she is a very timid/quite little one. We are 2 weeks on from this vlog and we are getting better! xxx

[@laurastaines8022]

Aww I felt so emotional watching this. I felt exactly the same with my little girl. Was so hard but honestly it really does get better! Just keep an eye and make sure that the nursery is the right one for her. I’m sure she will settle. However, it doesn’t sound like she’s getting the care she needs. At my daughters nursery they have a board that tells you how much lunch they ate, toilets etc. They also really pushed for her to stay for as long as she could so that she could get used to it. They are being paid to take care of your child. Whether that be from your pocket directly or through the 15 hour scheme. I think sometimes nursery teachers send children home just because the child is being ‘ hard work’ and by that I mean sensitive and requiring a lot of their attention so just make sure you push for longer if you feel like that’s the right decision for P. Sending you so much love and I really hope that P settles soon. She’s the sweetest little girl ♥️ xxxx

[@JVCxo]

I wish I have hand over notes but don't get them :( they want her to start staying all day after half term, so it's smal steps to that point. She's having her first ever lunch at school tomorrow, so hoping that goes well! xxx

[@KatieLeanne1x]

I work in a preschool and trust me it will get better. Some children take to it really well and others need time. It’s a big change in her routine, she will get used to it eventually and she will absolutely love it. Don’t ever feel bad about wanting her to stay longer as she does need that time to get used to you not being there and to understand that school is somewhere she goes on her own and that you will always come back for her. Once she is used to it she will be like a different child and you won’t even remember this difficult period! And she certainly won’t so don’t worry about it and don’t ever feel bad! Before you know it she wont want to leave rather than not wanting to go! ❤️ xx

[@JVCxo]

Thanks so much for this comment lovely. I really appreciate it. She's getting there, now doing full half day sessions which is fab, they want to start increasing to all day after half term! xxx

[@KatieLeanne1x]

Phoebe & Me oh good! I’m so glad for you! My little boy is 2 days younger than P and started preschool when he had just turned two and it was not easy! so I know how hard it is to see them upset and then leaving and not knowing if they are ok or not. I guess it wasn’t too bad for me as I started working at the same place not long after he started so he knew I was in the other room if he needed me! But good for P she’s doing fab and I’m sure she loves it now she’s more settled :) now all you have to do is work out how to spend all your free time when she starts full days! Take lots of time for yourself and enjoy relaxing without worrying about what she’s up to :) xxx

[@thelifeofaaliyah]

Don’t be too hard on yourself. This is a whole new experience for you both. P has had you around constantly since she was born so it’s only normal that’s she’s struggling with the change of going to nursery. Just keep on hyping up nursery, introduce treats after nursery maybe (not sure if you’re already doing this) and hopefully each time the drop off and experience will get better for you both. Also she’s probably having more accidents due to either being too occupied or perhaps being too shy to ask to use the toilet? My little girl started nursery in Jan too and even though she goes with her brother (they’re twins) she used to scream and cling to me for a good 30 mins each drop off time. It broke my heart and I felt super guilty. It’s only now at the end of the month she’s happy to go as she’s familiar with the place and the staff. Lots of luck to you both. Hope it gets easier xx

[@thelifeofaaliyah]

P is a shy girl. Don’t blame yourself for not taking her to playgroups. Once she comes out of her shell and settles in she will love nursery. xx

[@JVCxo]

I have started 'rewards' mainly snacks after school. Its the first thing she says, not hello, just 'can I have a snack mum?!' sake hahhahaha. xxx

[@alisoncolman4057]

My youngest used to do this for the first month!! I was in tears all the time, when I'd left she was absolutely fine, playing on her own. She will be fine xx It's us that suffer xx

[@alisoncolman4057]

Also, my Daughter wet herself...a lot....!! She would be so engrossed with playing, she just forgot to go to the loo xx Don't worry xx

[@JVCxo]

It's such an emotional time isn't it, I was prepared for it! xxx

[@alisoncolman4057]

I just wanted to give you a hug, I remember those days well xx

[@tracyalland1643]

It’s so tough when they start nursery hopefully it will get easier for you bothxx

[@JVCxo]

Thanks lovely! xxx

[@louisewalsh6200]

I really feel for you but all I can say is stick with it. Things will get better I promise. I have a very confident 4 year old who loves school. Kids are really resilient and will help her confidence no end. Good luck. X

[@JVCxo]

Thanks so much lovely!

[@lauracooke280]

The bond that you and p have is lovely 💜 xx

[@JVCxo]

Thanks lovely

[@Sugababe21]

Oh and the vlogs are not boring at all! Plz carry on xxx

[@JVCxo]

Thankyou! xxx

[@emmadrew4583]

I’m not sure if this comment is going to help you or not!!! I think it’s normal for them to regress, mine both went back to wetting the bed when they started nursery. They are clever little buggers and know how to pull on our heart strings! My first used to sit or stand on the edge of others and watch them play, seemed like he was a loner and seemed happy enough but never wanted to be part of it. That soon changed and he ended up being part of every little group. My second cried every day until end of year 2!! She will definitely make friends, don’t worry about her being on her own. Looking back on my firsts pattern, he’s 12 now, we changed his days to mornings then built them up. You and P are doing a great job, as you say, baby steps xx

[@JVCxo]

Aww really? Poor things! Oh god its so hard isn't it. Thanks so much, still taking baby steps, shes now doing half sessions perfectly, and now starting to have lunch at school as of tomorrow! xxx

[@nicek4692]

I hope P starts to enjoy it soon. Bless her.

[@JVCxo]

Thankyou! xxx

[@heatherhardaker3457]

God I found this so hard to watch . I feel very lucky that both my children loved school but I remember the kids that got upset every morning but never really thought how the mums/ dads must feel . I hope things get better for you and p ! Xx

[@JVCxo]

Thanks lovely, it’s really tough but I know she enjoys it once she’s there! xxx

[@Sugababe21]

You could do with a home / school log book that would probably help xx

[@JVCxo]

I don't think they do one! :( xxx

[@JadeSmithreviews]

My son used to do this I put a stamp on my hand and his and told him mummy is always with him because of the magic stamp and that helped it does get easier I’ve cried in the car many of times but hang in there the nursery sending p home early isn’t going to help my sons nursery always make sure my sons involved playing etc because he’s an only child he’ll quite happily sit and play by himself at times I blame myself because he is an only child but he’s 3 I’m not mentally or emotionally ready for another baby just so he’s not on his own as selfish as it sounds we just take him to the park soft play we’ve had a lot of home days because of the weather colds etc but all you can do is do your best because it does get easier even if it doesn’t seem like it will x

[@JVCxo]

Thats a good idea! I agree with the only child situ, I was the same as I have no siblings. But like you, I'm nowhere near ready, I've come to accept that. Its a never ending mental battle isnt it!

[@kimberleysutherland8401]

Hi Jess hopefully by the time we are seeing this p has done her 3 hours fingers crossed hope things are better! just a suggestion if she is struggling with her leggings and knickers maybe try a skirt and long knee high socks not the warmest but it may help. marks and Spencer start in 2-3. I work in a school, Im in year one but we work closely with nursery and reception and they should be the ones pushing you to go longer not the other way around really 😢 if she really can't manage it obviously it's for the best but just keep an eye on it to make sure it's in Ps best interests and not because it's easier for them 🙈 I know it's hard but they are paid to put in the groundwork to make her feel comfortable and safe. I really felt for you watching you upset but honestly you will soon be that mum waving goodbye at the door full of smiles this doesn't last forever promise ❤️ xx

[@JVCxo]

She has done 3 hours all of this week and so far so good. Lunch for the first time tomorrow too! I was really thrown off at first but this past week we've had really good comments, and they want to increase her to all day after half term! :) Thanks so much for your comment! xxx

[@alicexoxo2823]

Loved the 2nd part . I find this so interesting!! ❤️

[@JVCxo]

Thankyou

[@ruthcollett399]

Just keep persevering, she will get there. Don’t be afraid to ask for more help from the assistants that’s their job xx

[@JVCxo]

thanks lovely, I'm hoping there will be a parents evening before easter so we can have a proper chat about everything! xxx

[@jennie-lealloyd3151]

I went through the same thing with my youngest I ended up doing a reward incentive chart with him so when I would say if you go school like a good boy we would do something fun like go to the park or the library or feed the swans and ducks at Tehidy Woods but if you get upset and play up we can’t do any of the fun things you want to do and won’t get a sticker to put on the chart coz u played up for school, it took a couple of weeks I perceived and it paid off and he loved goin x

[@JVCxo]

I might try that soon, to be fair I don't think P really cares about rewards haha. I told her this morning if she's a good girl and doesn't cry she'll get a shopkins blind bag which she LOVES, still bawled her eyes out. She just can't cope with the emotions bless her xxx

[@squeakypickles.]

I didn’t take my children to playgroups either, I tried it with my eldest and it was awful! I was very lucky when they started nursery because my sister in law worked there and they knew her, so if they were upset, she would look after them. It sounds like little P went to toilet by herself and got in a pickle, bless her! Make sure the teachers know she needs assistance. It’s so stressful and heart wrenching for you both, I really feel for you. How’s she getting on now? And are you okay? Sending lots of love xxx

[@JVCxo]

Yep I couldn't deal with them, my idea of hell (top parent haha). Since the first accident we haven't had anymore since then, I told her to hold a teachers hand if she needs to go & tell them! She's staying for lunch today for the first time, so I'm hoping that goes well! Thanks lovely, xxx

[@squeakypickles.]

Oh wow, staying for lunch is a big step! How did she get on? Play groups are hell! The kids were running riot while the mums sat in their little groups, gossiping, I sat by myself, so awkward 😂 your videos about p bring back so many memories, I miss my 3 being little, my eldest two have moved out and only my son lives at home now, it’s really strange. You’re doing amazingly, thank you for your videos xxx

[@ProudNanny64]

Jess my heart goes out to you. My daughters both did what P is doing. But believe me it will get better and know that you r doing the right thing. My youngest would cry from leaving the house until the teacher took her away. But if my Dad took her she was fine. It was make Mummy pay time lol. Keep on going. Be strong. U r a good Mum with a big heart. ❤. I look forward to seeing her flourish at nursery and this difficult time will just be something u will both laugh about when she is 18 😁. Hugs from one mum to another. Michelle

[@JVCxo]

Yep same for P, as soon as she sees the uniform she's upset haha. She said shes excited for tomorrow so I hope she keeps her word haahaha xxx

[@littlelegsemporium]

hun i really feel for you , my hubby chris and went through the same stuff , but more so me as i always took both our boys too school everyday and collected them, chris had the odd day off so he used too take them etc , it can be very very upsetting for you both , i think Cameron our youngest was better at going in , in the end then his older brother , but i promise you hun you will get there and so will Phoebe bless her , she will make lots of friends and have a good time and before you i know it she will be going into school without a care in the world xxxx

[@JVCxo]

Thanks so much lovely, its such a long and tough/lonely process isn't it. But we are getting there slowly but surely! xxx

[@lizf8421]

This use to happen with my grandson all the time! They can play the teacher & the teachers don't want the responsibility so send them home. It's a nightmare! You just have to be tough and I promise you it will get better. So sad to see you so upset xxx

[@JVCxo]

Yep I found that, but it hasn't happened again so I hope its all smoothed out now! xxxx

[@marikatiernan1856]

Glad it ended so well.

[@JVCxo]

Thanks for watching :) xxx

[@louisehanlin1721]

We never used to say bye we used to wait until he was distracted or with teacher and left and after that he was fine x

[@JVCxo]

Oh god I couldn't do that for P, she'd be distressed until she saw me again. Saying bye is closure in a way, she knows I go, & then come back! xxx

[@marieharvey3910]

Oh honey, your doing great and P will settle in soon, my daughter is now 21 and cried every day for weeks, but honey she is a gorgeous young woman now with so much confidence but is still a very emotional girl, especially with old people, she loves them lol, so please don’t worry she will settle in and come home with wonderful stories for you, I was exactly the same and worried she wouldn’t have friends, but they do find their own way and looking back I was so worried but now my daughter is so popular with lots of friends, it’s a difficult phase honey but all will be ok 💓💓 xx

[@JVCxo]

Thanks so much. Aww bless her heart haha. It's all sooooo unknown which is why we worry! xxx

[@sarwatnadeem2728]

U both are so cute I know how emotional it can be hunny xxx

[@JVCxo]

Thanks for watching! xxx

[@emmachandler2178]

Bless u it is hard x she will get there honestly she will x

[@JVCxo]

Thankyou, I hope so! xxx

[@nicholecox3108]

She be ok my daughter was the same on her 3week she ok you got well soon xxxx

[@JVCxo]

Thankyou! xxx

[@maryh5221]

Oh Jess you brought tears to my eyes when I was watching this seeing you upset over leaving P! I was just the same with my daughter, was an awful couple of months when she started, but we have finally got there (she loves nursery now) I do hope P has settled more since you filming this. Was that “shopkins” you gave P in the car? My daughter is obbsesed with them but they are so expensive, can never find them anywhere cheap lol xxx

[@JVCxo]

We are getting there, she cries every time but her face when I pick her up is amazing, the teachers say shes good as gold after I leave! Yep it was, they are in poundland, & home bargs, obvs the cheap places for me to buy them hahaa! xxx

[@carliefaithx]

Hun Archies been through this he just started in jan too. I have been spraying my perfume on his sleeve to help him feel safe and it’s really helping ♥️

[@JVCxo]

Good idea, I'll do that tomorrow, thankyou! xxx

[@tinaquarrell53quarrell55]

My youngest used to cry every time I took her even though I did lots of toddler groups etc as I have done all my children but as I was a single parent by then and she was used to just me and was always with me so when it came to nursery she really struggled plus we weren’t prepared as I didn’t have any setting in sessions as such because I thought she would be starting playgroup like my others did for just morning but the nursery approached me and said she could start as she was 3 don’t even put her name down because her brother went there they automatically offered her a place no home visit just a visit to the nursery took her photo she had a couple of hour sessions with me there then they asked me to leave her for an hour then pick her up that’s when I had to sneak out as she would cry because I came in each time to settle her then go when occupied if she saw me she would cry but they would cuddle her and they said she would stop after 10 minutes and be happy after a week she went 5 afternoons a week about 3 hours and after about 3 weeks she just stopped crying One day I said I am going to the shop and I will come back for you later and she fine gave me a kiss and cuddle and said bye after that she just went in not even that bothered as long as I waved to her from the window but I always had to stay at every single Birthday she was invited to even at school she wouldn’t stay on her own x

[@JVCxo]

Oh wow that was really quick then! Bless her, its so hard isn't it. The thing is they won't even remember any of this, its us that do! xxx

[@tinaquarrell53quarrell55]

Phoebe & Me just keep reassuring that you will come back for her later and not let her see you upset I work in a nursery and we even have 4 year olds cry and they have been at nursery for years but new teachers new children still upsets them a cuddle and they soon settle down a baby in one of the rooms I work in and I am often in all the rooms often cries when she seems me and all babies generally like and take to me and yesterday she was absolutely fine with me until after her sleep then she cried again for a bit but after that she wanted me to pick her up all the time. We don’t call parents unless absolutely necessary and we encourage longer sessions rather than shorter the sooner they get used to us and other children the quicker they settle x

[@sarahjay3045]

Some kids are just shy, taking her to playgroups probably wouldn’t have changed that if it’s just who she is. My kids are the same, my eldest’s first school report said she needed more interaction with unknown adults as she is so shy. Now, at 6, she is finally getting there! And I’ve had a shitty bag of clothes home too 😫 and that was after 6 months at pre school, so it definitely does happen!

[@JVCxo]

She is a quiet child regardless, so I hope us not going to playgroup effected anything. Oh god haha, I don't want a bag of poo again anytime soon!xxx

[@AdventureswithKJ3]

At age 3 we did 5 mornings she soon got used to it and loved it full time school now, is that poss for p to do?x

[@JVCxo]

I don't think I'm able just to switch days due to capacity of class etc! Going to stick with what we have for now and see how we go! :) xxx

[@luc.tazmin.95]

Do all the nursery children where full school uniform?? X

[@JVCxo]

Yep, not compulsory but I'd say out of 25 children, 23 are wearing uniform! xxx

[@luc.tazmin.95]

@@JVCxo omg that's quite surprising to me bc my little ones pre school only has a jacket they had to wear with the school logo on it 😘. Hope u didn't think I was being rude by asking. xxx

[@jessiel7694]

You’re an amazing mommy! ❤️

[@JVCxo]

Thanks so much

[@myrakirk9979]

Ah P is just a great little girl. Real credit to you Jess 😘

[@JVCxo]

Thankyou so much

[@nicolasmith6186]

aw bless you,it is so hard when they start school but hang in there carry on being firm,she will eventually make friends and stop crying,its probably because shes used to just you and her and trying to do all she can to not go lol,ive done it 3 times and all 3 of my boys were different my 1st born (now 16)started just after his 3rd birthday cried first few days and was then fine,my middle boy (diagnosed autistic at 5) was slighlty different,he had speech delay where he would just point and grunt or say yeah or no he walked later than other kids (around 17/18 months)later off the bottle,never met any of his mild stones,was always on his own didnt like playing with other children just liked being on his own all the time i would literally have to drop him off give him a kiss and run as he would scream lie on the floor kick off and try run after me.he did half days for a year until he was 4 then he started full time,he has never ever liked school even now at 15 he will kick off and try everything to have a day off.hes just a boy that likes his own company dont like change dont like people only people older than him not kids his age he never has.dont like crowds dont like noise etc.my youngest is totally oppisite hes 6 and apart from first 2/3 days we've never had any trouble with him he absolutely loves school.so every child is different its for her own good she like u said needs to learn that when she cries it doesnt mean mums coming to get me.they try everything in the book to make us feel guilty lol.good luck.xx

[@JVCxo]

Can't blame them can you, all they know is staying with mummy in their bubble, and then they get pushed into a completely new environment! I think I'll always feel guilty for it haha! xxx

[@nicolasmith6186]

@@JVCxo not at all they are so young and its a huge step for you both,i cried for all of my boys first day even when my youngest didnt lol.in wales it used to be they start nursery 3 half day then reception full day at 4,now they do so many different groups etc like wrap around where the parents put little one in nursery in morning then play group in the afternoon,5 days a week,even play groups half day as soon as their potty trained i held of until i had to send them to school lmao.hope p is more settled for you next week.xx

[@starperry1784]

Listen darling don't worry bout her poohing herself she just got her self worked up wiv upset she's only little its a whole new world to her its better for her to go little and often one hour a day every day wld get her more usued to it don't worry this is all natual x

[@JVCxo]

Thankyou, she is getting there and hasn’t had another accident since 🙌🏻 xxx

[@Sugababe21]

It might help rewarding her with a marble in the jar or a sticker chart for staying at school then a little treat at the end of the week, just a suggestion xxx

[@JVCxo]

I've got a stash of shopkins for her ahha! xxx

[@rachaelkp4272]

Aww darl, awful seeing you so upset but then when she was talking to Neil!!! 😊 that was lovely! Seeing her today trotting along with her bag, she is doing so well! Keep it up P and well done Jess for getting through it xxxxxxx

[@JVCxo]

Thanks so much for the support lovely!

[@gracearnold251]

I work in a preschool/playgroup and we say to parents that we prefer parents not to bring their child in if they have had calpol as this is a sign that they are ill. Because it’s not fair on the staff to then get all the illnesses, don’t know if this is the same in all nursery’s?

[@JVCxo]

Yeah I didn't know this was a thing haha! She wasn't poorly just gave her some just incase, but atleast I know for next time! She had to have last friday off because of a sickness bug, didn't even know 48 hours off was a thing either. So much to learn! xxx

[@loulou3473]

My 3 year old goes to preschool for 4 mornings a week. I think full days are to much at this young age for some children. I think the school giving into p and calling you every time probably wasn’t helping her settle as she knew you would pick her up.

[@JVCxo]

Noooo I agree, it didn't help, but she's getting there now! She's having lunch tomorrow for the first time and shes excited about it! xxx

[@kim11babe]

Don’t worry too much Jess and don’t cry..P will be fine. It will take some time for her to settle in. Maybe you could meet other mummies after school and go to the park ; that way P would get to know some of her preschool friends and always have someone to play with. I cried every single day until year 2 🙄 I was always with the teachers. Every child is different always remember that

[@JVCxo]

Thankyou, its really hard to meet other parents, its so quick and brief! I really hope we make friends at some point but I can't see it being anytime soon! :( xxx

[@chloejulian4792]

Keep going you will both get there ❤

[@JVCxo]

Thankyou!

[@EmilyCharlotte]

Mine done the same there , I came home with loads of plastic bags , don’t worry they do care for them but she is getting used to a new setting or asking the staff , after a while she get more independent, like I said it happened to my first a lot , the staff are so good at helping them, message me if you want to talk I know the staff and school well x

[@JVCxo]

That was the first and only accident so far, touch wood! Thankyou lovely for reaching out to me, the staff are great aren't they. Did you ever get hand over notes for what they did at school? Send me a message on insta

[@charlottem7453]

As you know Isabella has been going for over 2 years now and she can still go through stages of being upset at drop off. She also still prefers being around a ’familiar adult’. I guess it was easier for us because she has been going 9/10 hours a day from 11 months so doesn’t know any different (god that sounds an awful lot of hours). Don’t worry P will be just fine 😘 She looks so grown up in her uniform 😩 xx

[@JVCxo]

Thanks lovely, shes getting there! xxx

[@Sugababe21]

Jess, this will get better take it from a mum and someone who works in a nursery, it feels like bad now but she will come round honestly it’ll just take abit longer, it sounds like it’s a bit overwhelming for her but she will find her place there and honestly the amount of poo explosions we have on a daily basis we think nothing of it, plz don’t beat yourself up it’s nothing you’ve done x

[@JVCxo]

Thanks so much lovely! It's such an adjustment for all of us! xxx

[@mariestephens2394]

Oh Jess this was such an honest vlog.. bless you. P is such a sweetie, I'm sure soon she'll be coming home listing all the names of her new school friends. Dreading having to send my little girl to nursery one day (she's only 10 months). I can't be doing with baby groups either, find them really difficult. Big ❤️'s

[@JVCxo]

Thankyou, she keeps talking about 1 little girl, so hopefully she's made a friend and not made some random name up aha. I couldn't deal with baby groups either, you aren't alone with that one! xxxx

[@helenchapman612]

❤️

[@JVCxo]

Thanks for watching xxx

[@jacquelinewale1231]

❤️xx

[@JVCxo]

Thanks for watching! xx

[@Gillwillz]

Aw Jess I really feel for you I really do , its so difficult and upsetting to leave your child upset, I know you said u didnt like play groups/toddler groups, but it really helped my daughter integrate with other children of her own age when I went to groups, chatting with other mums and letting her play, its been a shock for her being left even for an hour with new faces. Have you tried 'channel mum' on youtube - they offer great advice and ideas to help with these situations. You will get there Jess - just persevere, P is a clever little girl and will soon twig that doing something out of the ordinary will prompt them to call you - make sure they dont make a habit of that - well done anyway , it breaks my heart to see u upset. Maybe if P does make a little friend , u can invite mum and daughter round for tea, that way P will get used to someone - just a thought xxx

[@JVCxo]

I do wish I was brave enough to go to groups but never did! Thanks so much, I have told P tomorrow at school, she can ask her friend if she wants to come and play one day with her mum. It's such a fast hand over, with other children staying until different times I don't get to see what child is with what parent! :( xxx

[@Gillwillz]

@@JVCxo yeah I can understand that - well at least its a thought to consider - and stay strong Jess - I know its easy for everyone to say but it will get better I promise xx

[@Chloe_furlong]

I was told they let children use the toilets independently and they only wiped them if they asked

[@Chloe_furlong]

Posted that before I could finish. My son had an accident and I asked them how, they said the children are free to use the toilet as and when they please and can call for help if needed. I felt uncomfortable with this and took him out as I knew he wouldn’t shout for help and when I asked him if he asked he said he did but they couldn’t hear him 🤦🏼‍♀️

[@nicek4692]

Aww don’t stress. School isn’t really important until Age 5

[@JVCxo]

Thankyou, still hard though! xxx

[@michellecondy8936]

No your fault, will take time, stop beating yourself up she will get there, horrendous time starting nursery and school we've all been there and we all get through it

[@JVCxo]

Thankyou. We are almost a month in and shes enjoying it when she's there! xxx

[@laurenansell9914]

Sorry you’ve been struggling but you’re just feeling normal mum feels. You shouldn’t feel any guilt though. Playgroups would have made a big difference to P but you can’t change the past. I saw on insta today that you had a good day today so that’s fab. If you want to encourage her to make friends easier you can still take her to playgroups and different groups. It would help her massively and give you a chance to speak to other mums about worries or any concerns so you see you’re are not the only one going through it. Poppy had a couple of accidents when she first started, and it was always either that she was too busy playing and left it too late to get to the loo in time or that the teacher didn’t hear her when she was asking to go, just cos there’s so many kids. Make the handover as quick as possible too, even if she’s really upset literally hand her straight over tell her you love her and say bye. Keeping it as quick as that really shows her that this it’s what’s happening, yes it’s new but you’ve gotta get used to it. Hope things are better now anyway xx

[@JVCxo]

Hand over has been made really quick now. Kiss, cuddle and I make sure she puts her hand out and goes straight to the teacher so she isn't left on her own. God it breaks my heart but shes getting there. She's having her first lunch at school tomorrow & shes really excited! xxx

[@laurenansell9914]

That’s great news 👍🏼 well done to you both. How she enjoys it. Wasn’t nice seeing you so emotional but to be expected xx

[@EmilyCharlotte]

Message me Jess so I can talk to properly about it all x

[@JVCxo]

Send me a DM

[@mariewilliams265]

Ahh she is still only a baby and for her go do a poo that went everywhere it sounds like she had an iffy tummy. I Understand how upsetting it is for but on the same note I cried when my son started school he ran off and went in and never even looked back. He was also going to a Welsh speaking only school and he did not know any welsh, so as u can imagine what I was like 😭 I was all no this is not right he won't have any friends because he will not understand what they or saying and how can he go to the toilet cos he does know how to say "can I go to the toilet please". I was heartbroken and he did wet himself a few times but that was he had been that engrossed in whatever he was playing with or who he was playing with etc. But honestly he did not look back, he was bringing home his reading book and they were all in welsh ffs, I thought shit what am I going to do here, but within 3 weeks he was speaking Welsh like it had been his first language. He used to ask me what words were etc and I wld have to say wait till after dinner when daddy gets home, he may know, but then he thought it funny that he had a "stupid mummy" who did not understand what he was saying and that I cld not read, he found it great speaking to people and I did not understand what they were saying etc so honestly Jess in a few weeks time she will love it and realise what a big girl going to school and in her own time she will come round once she has find she has found somebody to play with then she will be crying on the Wednesday cos she does not want to go home cos they were having fun etc xx xx

[@JVCxo]

Aww bless him, haha thats so sweet, I'm so glad he was ale to adjust so well. I'd have been freaking out just like you did! Thanks so much for the comment, I really hope she makes some friends! xxx

[@frankiebaxter2590]

💜💜

[@JVCxo]

Thanks for watching lovely! xxx