Parents Disapproved Our Relationship

Our biggest challenge as a couple was fighting with my parents, who disapproved of my relationship. It caused a lot of issues between us, and we wanted to share with others that may be going through similar problems.
✌ F I N D M E @LETITIAKIU✌
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A B O U T
I'm Letitia (Le-tish-a), a fashion school graduate based in Toronto. I'm here to share fashion industry secrets, girl talks, DIYs, and outfit ideas. I also vlog with my bf Stefan. We travel, share relationship advice, and capture our daily movements.
#interracialrelationship #interaccialcouple #longtermrelationship #relationshipadvice #relationships

[@letitiakiu]

Instagram stories is where the behind the scenes of this relationship truly thrives. Follow on @letitiakiu ✌

[@hotpepper5037]

wtf .u know these close mind parents need to be awaken. this is 2019 we one race which is human race. please don't be your parents bitch. u don't belong to them. u belong to god.

[@33hunting]

Letitia Kiu, have you ever dated an Asian or Chinese guy?

[@mpho-s13]

After high school, were you dependant on your family finance were you free after high school?

[@Sarah-kc3fb]

I can never understand people moving to another country and then being against their children dating another ethnicity.

[@nazbah5929]

That's my mom right there. Moved me and her to Canada and now all of a sudden has a problem with me dating outside my race 🤣 specifically if he's black

[@_Bishaka]

Exactly

[@wolfgirl167Jess]

Me and my partner have this issue his mum moved to the uk she from china outrage that he’s would date white women legit not given me chance only hated me by colour my skin and she refuse learn English when been here since young 20s his mum and she now 50.

[@n.m6249]

Ethiopians and Eritrean need to read this comment

[@BaerBerian]

@@nazbah5929 Because Canada is one of the whitest countries in the world. I’d be upset too, if I sacrificed everything to move you to another country and you make that choice.

[@Rin-le7cx]

As an Asian. I grew up with my Family not wanting me to date and not want me to be near any man. Need to stay at home all the time. And all of the sudden when ur nearing 30. They will ask u. Y r u not married yet? 🙄

[@rimano3922]

Omg yes my struggle now

[@mara_jeon]

omg yes 😂

[@monicapanjaitan]

yeah i can relate. I was in a very happy relationship with my ex when i was still in college, but i must broke up with him because my family were against our relationship. I was sad and broken, i couldn't do anything for nearly 2 years, for the most part, it wasn't because of the break up, but the fact that when i was broken heart, no one was there to comfort me, and i really could not tell anyone about my feelings. Those times were my downfall. And 4 years after, I haven't really had a real relationship with someone, and as i am healing myself now, my mom would always tell me to get married and stuff, just because im 25 now, and i already have good career, i just need to get married. Gosh, i just cant believe that my mom still can say that thing to me after that bad break up :( so sad.

[@rimano3922]

@@monicapanjaitan I'm so sorry that happened to you, I can't imagine being in your situation (even though I think I'll be in it sooner than i'd think)... I really hope you'll be in peace with what happened and with yourself. Someone out there WILL SEE how unique and special u r

[@311rbb]

Sooo for real!

[@caseyrose19]

My mother stopped talking to me when she found out I was dating my now husband. She assumed I had cheated on my previous partner and wasn’t open minded enough to listen to what actually was happening. Unfortunately I don’t see us ever talking again even though I’ve reached out many times. But I’ve accepted that and wouldn’t give up my husband from anything. He saved me from a very dark place in my life.

[@letitiakiu]

Casey, I'm glad you have your husband by your side! It's unfortunate that your mom doesn't want to open that connection, but making peace with your situation is a good thing. I'm happy for you!

[@nurse956]

Wow u shouldnt give up ur husband when u know he has always been there for u. My family stopped talking after i left home and moved to london from norway to marry him. I knew him for 8 yrs and has been always there in my dark times. My family is saying that i betrayed them and stabbed in thier back and never opened up infront of them. They dont accept how scared i was to talk about it and how scared i was for my life and his life. We hv a baby now and they text me Like ur child is born as bastard and that may God punish you and burns you in hell fire and ur husband is a dog, black, ugly and shit etc etc. It has been 5 yrs but still same but i dont want to loose hope. I dont know whether i should love them or hate them. But i know that i will never give up my husband. All parents are not same and my parents are u even cant start a discussion bec they starts crying, emotional blackmailing and then swearing and saying bad thing like i am bitch etc etc. It is very hard for me and painfull i am going through

[@MostlovelyMedia]

@@nurse956 don't give, I just do hope everything works out fine for you.

[@Melissa-gy9dp]

Your happiness is all that matters! I hope you have a good life

[@YanaNova]

@@Melissa-gy9dp I agree with you, Edna!:)

[@antifleshnimbus]

As a mother, I believe that parents are here to be guides, teachers of life not to be authorities. So, the decisions the kids make are just a result of those teachings and we really as parents never get to decide the destiny our kids choose. We have to be the most supportive, that's basically everything that we can do. Especially, if we see that a particular decision kids made are making them happy.

[@elizabethgarcia1350]

I wish my mom and dad had the same mindset you do i am currently not talking to them and dont know if it will ever happen they got all my uncles and aunts to think bad about us to and all because I fell In love with my at the time boyfriend ( he's my husband now) but long story short we are currently 2 years happily married with our first son occasionally I think about if only they would have been more open minded I would still be in contact with them. And it hurts .. ..

[@CrazyCormac]

Wow. What A Great Thinking. I Wish My Mother Or My GF's Mother's Thinking Become Like Yours. Sorry For My Bad English.

[@sheilacastillo3988]

I wish my parents would have the same thoughts as you but my family never comes around to be supportive of me want to be in your interracial relationship. But I'm glad they're still support out there. And I don't feel alone

[@KIARALOVES]

💯 I couldn’t imagine that being said or explained any better!!!

[@ma.verajavier3844]

this is really happy to read. thank you for being an open minded mother who is supportive to see how kids do things that could make them happy. yes, I pray my parents will have the same mindset as you. I would never leave them and having a relationship or being married does not mean that I will cut them off. I am 30 years old and I just felt so sad how my parents had so much restrictions to me.

[@CT-cf8vi]

This helped me so much! I’m in an interracial relationship, and my dad disowned me. My mom doesn’t support me dating a black man, but she still keeps in touch with me. Thank you so much! I’ve found my peace and let go of trying to convince them or feel like I’m selfish for living out my life decision. He treats me so well and like a lady. We respect each other and got each other’s backs- all that matters! I feel like he’s the one. He’s my first love :)

[@Brightycoeur]

I'm going through the same process. My asian parents did not approved of my relationship but I think it has more to do so with asians worry to much about what other asians/family think of it. They are more afraid of being judge by others and blaming them for not raising their kids right. Cause I think deep down they know that their disapproval is irrelevant. Plus they have that old mindset of how live and love works, that makes it harder for them to cope with how we western kids live now. At first it really got to me and stressed me out that they didn't approve cause I was in the middle of it. But how I handle it now is to not worry so much and just ignore the disapproval. Bring Stefan to family occasions, let him meet your relatives. Feel strong about it and don't give yourself a doubt. Cause what happened was that my aunts and uncles liked him and my parents noticed that and at the end started to change their mindset. It's harder if you are the first one in your family that brings back a (not asian) boyfriend but it has to start somewhere.

[@letitiakiu]

This is so true. My parents did ask a few times "How would our community feel" and they were very worried about integrating someone of a different race into their circle. It's funny because a lot of my family and their friends are fluent in English, but still hold very conservative Chinese values. They also have a very different understanding of love. I am now bringing Stef around, but it took about 12 years hahaha.

[@victoriakanagavelan4853]

hi i’m kinda having the same issue, but the thing is his extended family feels like because his mum disapproves they disapprove as well and when going for family occasions, wouldnt it be awkward for you while his parents who disapprove is there? or even disrespectful for bringing someone ur parents didnt like? i rly need some advice

[@malka2199]

If anyone has advice I’d also love to hear if they have experience with this and have any thoughts.

[@strawberrigurl19]

I feel you 100% on this topic! I'm going through the exact same situation right now. I'm Filipino and my boyfriend is Latino, so there are cultural differences. I've already got the point where I don't really care what they think anymore, but it still sucks to know that they won't even try to get to know my boyfriend and see why I care about him so much. Fingers crossed that things will be better in the future.

[@letitiakiu]

Yes, the willful ignorance is very hurtful. I had to learn and am continuing to learn that it is not a reflection of me, but a reflection of their fear and misplaced anger. I hope things will improve for you and your bf!

[@lilceaz99]

I'm the Mexican man in the same situation. It sucks but it is what it is. I love her and that's all this is about

[@KK-de5ty]

You are the master of your life do what makes you happy regardless of your parents opinions

[@NLGM234HI5]

My African parents had acted HORRIBLY to my current boyfriend to the point that he wants nothing to do with them and I'm now having to make a decision between my parents and my love. I've tried to hold out hope that my parents would accept or that maybe one day he could find a way to forgive them and work it out but it doesnt seem possible..... my parents acted just like yours and I'm at that point of letting them go too cause I can't allow my life to constantly be dictated by them cause they'll never be happy with anything i choose for myself.... it would hurt me more to lose my love than to let go of my parents

[@gloriousbliss4305]

Same situation and I am cutting ties completely with them. The lies, the disrespect, the demeaning is so much but my fiance has been there for me in dark times and good times. I will not give him up for them. Press on Sis! Pleasing them will do you no good..

[@aislinnthelion]

Thank you very much for talking about this, because it is a very common issue that really needs to talked about more. My parents have always told me I would be disowned if I dated or married someone who was not white. She wouldn’t even let me bring my best friend in seventh grade over after school because she was African American. It broke my heart. My first crush and first boyfriend was Alaskan native, which is not white. She lectured me every single day, she wouldn’t let speak to him on the phone if she got to it before me (flashback to land lines where it was a race to the phone) I would have to sneak out to go to the movies with him, to walk to school with him I had to leave a early before she left for work. He and I are. We are no longer together and I have dated other men that weren’t white after that. I was not going to listen to her horrible rules because the colour of their skin, their culture, or where they are from does not matter to me. As long as they are someone that I truly care about, I don’t care what they look like. I still have hope she will someday come around, put her negative and disgusting views to rest. But I will not hold my breath. We don’t speak very much anymore, she shut me out very much over the years. I will accept that, and I will never treat my children that way. As long as the person my children are with - man, woman, Korean, Chinese, Japanese, African American, Pakistani, doesn’t matter to me as long as they treat my child right and they aren’t a murderer I will be very thankful they found someone they truly love. Thank you for this video.

[@letitiakiu]

I really appreciate your open mindedness. It's really disappointing when old stigma prevents us from treating each other with respect and love. Thank you for sharing . your story!

[@lilychen5652]

1000% relatable. My boyfriend is the same race as I am, but it's still the same. I needed to hear that it's not worth fighting over because you can't change their mind. Thank you for sharing!

[@Illuminatiownsus]

I feel sometimes parents are too sheltered with anxiety and have narcissistic power tendencies over their kids not respecting their feelings and choices, it’s evil and wicked and those parents should feel ashamed, your child is not your personal slave, being possessive doesn’t equate to ❤️

[@nnekavanessa3005]

Wow you just said nothing but the truth and that needs to change man🙌🏾

[@rareafrican]

I loved this video! I can relate to you so much. My boyfriend still has not met my parents yet due to my parents being so complicated and doubting my five year relationship with him. It hurts a lot, especially since his parents are fine with me and they have met me and everything. my parents have been so difficult with it. Thankfully my boyfriend has really been patient during the whole thing...anyways let me not write a whole paragraph in the comment section haha, i enjoyed the video, looking forward to the next!

[@rimano3922]

I was actually looking forward to read more about it lol cause i'm having the same issue now, but my bf and i are dating for 1 year only and i'm thinking of breaking it off, 'cause everyone is against me and i'm starting to lose hope 💔 i hope everything worked out well for you ❤

[@sharonmason6456]

Riman O I thought about breaking it off with my bf around the 1 year mark several times for the same reason, family pressuring me to it and making my life a living hell with him. But does he make you happy? Does he treat you well? They don’t have to live with him you do. It’s your relationship, not theirs. I’m so glad I didn’t break up with him over that

[@jacquelineli293]

Hi Riman! Same with my situation. I was actually looking for any good answers about it. It’s really stressing me out. It really breaks me. 💔

[@rareafrican]

Riman O i hope you did not break it off!! I had some family against mine too as well as friends who. I thought i can count on! But we are still strong as ever ! 6 years now, so I pray you keep on keeping on! Nothing amazing in life is ever easy. But if you are a believer in God trust in Him im telling you!!!😁❤️& during the first year too i was thinking the same thing! But dont especially if you both truly love each other and have the same goals/future!

[@YanaNova]

@@rimano3922 How is it going nowadays Riman?

[@gracehwangg]

i'm been living through this for a while and hearing your thoughts on interracial relationships/ asian parents really helped legitimize my thoughts, fears, and doubts on the relationship itself (ESPECIALLY the foot out the door syndrome). 9 years strong after parents gave me a firm disapproval. planning for 2019 as the year to finally sit down with my parents and tell them what the deal is. thank you so much for sharing.

[@letitiakiu]

I'm surprised so many people experience this feeling as well! I really felt individualistic in that sense, because none of my friends really have that escaping problem. Wishing you lots of love and luck for the day you choose to talk to your parents! You are strong 💕

[@victoriakanagavelan4853]

how did it go?

[@madinaroshan8173]

Update up please!!!!

[@alvin4759]

Need a "sit down" with them too. I keep pushing it to the future because I have zero faith that they will listen to me and its always just disappointing lol

[@MelissaParuzel]

One thing I learn from my parents is that love and acceptance makes life easier. Theirs was an interracial relationship which was not approved by my paternal grandmother and family. It was hard for my father to accept his family didn't want to talk to him but there was nothing he could do. My maternal side of the family accepted them with open arms because love knows no colours and as long both side makes each other happy, nothing else matters. Our parents can only advice us but we are the one that is on a journey to self discovery.

[@letitiakiu]

As a teenager I was very within myself and unable to empathize with what my parents must have been going through. I know they were very worried about me and they were doing the best that they could. I'm just glad I followed my own path in the end. 💜

[@soniaidugboe4964]

This situation sounds so similar to mine. My now husband and I are also highschool sweethearts, been together for 12.5 years (married for 3 of those years). I am Nigerian and my husband is white (polish/Belgian heritage). My parents weren't disapproving of the relationship because of my husband's race, it was more so that they did not want me dating at all because they thought it would be too distracting seeing as how we were only 16 years old at the time. I think they could have approached the situation differently for sure. It was not until I got into University that they kind of let my husband and I be. On another note: I'm not grouping the entire asian community as a whole, but I have heard a lot of my Chinese friends say that their parents would disown them (and I know some who have actually disowned their children) for dating someone black. One of my friends straight up told me that their parents are okay with them dating a white girl, but they could never bring a black girl home. It wasn't even the comment itself that made me mad, it's the fact that my friend accepted this comment and didn't try and educate his parents on how ignorant and racist the comment is.

[@stylish.thrifther79]

Sonia Idugboe yes I hear the same thing too

[@letitiakiu]

There was never an explicit list of ok races for us to date. All of my exes were asian before that and my parents still hated them. I think because Stefan isn't asian, it was opportunity for my parents to give reasons as to why we shouldn't be together. I do know lots of asians that idealize white and their own race. It's messed up because there's colourism and discrimination just within the continent of Asia. It's wild

[@mpho-s13]

Hey x I'm going through the same thing, I'm turning 18 and this made me very happy and hopeful that your parents finally let you be and mine will as well later on especially since you're African and so I am. Thanks for sharing your story!!!!! So needed!!! So much hope has been instilled in me

[@gabimaza780]

Also that old school mentality involves apt of sexism. Like that’s why I think your BFs parents where more chill and your parents weren’t. Also I have experienced this to that degree

[@letitiakiu]

It's true. Parents are aware of how messed up society is towards women, and in a very twisted way, they want to control their daughters to protect them from patriarchy. Now my parents are rolling their eyes at me when I march around in my "feminist ways" haha

[@melonyrachelle8228]

Thank you so much the love of my life and I are going thru the same situation as y’all and actually hearing everything I’m going thru but thru another person explaining it ... is such a relief that i am not alone. nothing but love from our relationship to yours 💓

[@graceku6648]

Thanks for sharing your story. 😭 I’m amazed by you guys’ maturity towards the parents. To know and accept that they may never consent the relationship is so liberating in a sense. A lot of Asians feel guilt towards parents sacrifices and feel we have to live up to their expectations. But knowing and accepting that parents are human is harder than it seems. I hope the very best for you two lovely people 💕

[@liyapancaldi7751]

I am SO glad I stumbled across this video because I am going through the same things with my parents. I needed to her this motivation from someone who has gone through the same thing!!!! Thank you.

[@laxy3496]

Thanks for sharing all of this. Going through this right now as well and you put a lot of my feelings into words. Thanks to yourself (and this comment section) for revalidating that we have to live our own lives at the end of the day.

[@hyson87]

I had interracial relationships and my parents disapproved both. The first guy was a terrible person anyway, but the second boyfriend was a good one. My parents met him and seemed to approve at first, but later they disapproved and I had so many fights with my parents. Eventually, the relationship ended due to it being a long distance relationship and us being really tired of fighting back. We could've fought back, but we were going in different directions in our lives at that moment as well... It is a sad story for me because I loved him very much. I really admire how Stephen could endure the disapproval because if I were him, it would be so hard. Now my mom says she'll be fine with me being in an interracial relationship if I meet a good person. my sister is in an interracial relationship and it's fine with them now. To think about it, I think my parents was too protective of me back then. I was just out of university trying to get a job and pay off massive student loan. They didn't want my relationship to become an obstacle to my future opportunities. But it was such a difficult time to go through. I haven't been in a serious relationship ever since then, for 8years.

[@letitiakiu]

Michelle! I love that I'm getting to know you more. I'm sorry things didn't work out with your previous boyfriends. My mom encouraged me to date around to gain experience and understand what I want, but then when it came around to it, she would get upset and worry about my school or career. I'm glad to hear that your family is coming around to interracial relationships. We have much to learn of different cultures!

[@marvinodhiambo8362]

Very similar experience here! Mine was intertribal and the lady gave in to the pressure from home! I can't describe the pain of the heartbreak coz our lives were blending well, compatible with similar christian aspirations as well. That was the biggest crisis of all my life! But I thank God I'm still alive!

[@mikiejae]

wow thank you for talking about this... i was at such a loss/ still kinda am when it comes navigating interracial relationships. but im so glad to hear theres progress nd that they're slowly coming around. THANK U!!!

[@letitiakiu]

THANK YOU MIKIE!

[@antonio8461]

So glad to hear this... some of us have this situation or similar situations. Thanks for sharing this!

[@letitiakiu]

I'm surprised so many!

[@madhawarock]

Going through something similar and I have to say thanks for sharing your story. I just try to use their disapproval as a motivation to become more independent.

[@kmtz2384]

Thank you for sharing! While I didn’t go through this exact thing in my past relationship a lot of things resonated with me. I grew up with Mexican immigrant parents who disliked the idea or even just the thought of me dating. I tried really hard to be open and honest when I was invited to go on dates but I always got a negative reaction. Eventually I lied and like mentioned in the video it’s not right and not the best thing but when you’ve been hurt you just don’t want to put yourself through that again. My first serious relationship ended because he couldn’t understand why it was so difficult to speak to my parents about us dating despite me explaining. On top of that we had cultural differences that to me weren’t a big deal but I knew to my immigrant parents it was going to be hard to accept. It’s sad to think I never grew up with my parents being happy I met someone and excited to meet him. For me it’s always been a difficult topic to bring up and although they’ve gotten better I too have to accept that they’ll never be happy and excited to meet any future boyfriends.

[@bmxx7892]

I relate so much to the fear of relationship. I've always witnessed relationships that went bad or with people suffering a lot, so I'm really afraid to get into one and I always avoid them. I'm impressed with the patience you both showed to keep it going on. Thanks for sharing this with us! Lots of love, Mélanie 💜

[@letitiakiu]

Mélanie, I had no idea you felt that way! It's very interesting to me that what we grew up and absorbed as children reflects upon our relationships in the future. I haven't shaken that fear to this day, and I hope to grow from it and allow myself to be vulnerable.

[@andreakissinger2165]

Stefan is so handsome! He seems like such a nice, calm guy. How could any parents not want that for their child?

[@MissssTai]

I totally relate to the ‘foot out the door’ syndrome. I have it too. It’s super hard for me to accept real genuine love and to fully give myself. I’m always fearing abandonment so I stay semi detached to protect myself. This system works fairly well when you’re dealing with fuck boys but when a good egg comes into your life it’s pretty disastrous. Your partner ends up feeling very unappreciated and replaceable. I’m learning to fix that part of myself everyday. Having a patient, loving partner helps so much. They have every right to walk away so when they don’t, it means so much.

[@letitiakiu]

I totalllllllyyyyy feel this. And I’m sure Stefan does too. I’m great at self sabotaging at my happiest and I think going back to therapy may help me I learn some of this pattern. Thank you for sharing 💕

[@kpoplover1901]

hi i know this is an old comment but this is me too. I realized I had abandonment issues and I definitely try the one foot out the door thing with my boyfriend who is of a different culture and religion to me. I notice that even though I'm so happy and hes a great person for me (patient, stable, unconditional - unlike my parents) that I do inadvertently and directly tell him that I would have no worries if we were of the same background and religion. That I would be so carefree. And that definitely pushes him to feel like he should just let me go so I don't have to be anxious anymore. Its something I neeed to fix and I've decided I need to go to therapy too to address it.

[@sharonxu3275]

girl i can relate to you so hard, i think its extremely difficult with east asian parents, unfortunately a lot of toxic stereotypes are normallised in our culture :(

[@MmmBien]

I’m currently going through this and it does hurt my bf’s feelings that I have to hid him. I’m waiting for us to get our apartment so I can move out. At the end of the day it’s your life and you have to do what makes you Happy!

[@MmmBien]

An update, I ended up talking to my mom and siblings about it and they are happy for whatever choice I make in life. They said if I am happy then they will support me and be there for me! 🙏 forever grateful

[@leeleeskiski]

Parts of what you shared resonated a lot with me. I also "snuck around" with my high school partner who I've been with now for 10+ years. Because of bad experiences in my family, my parents were very controlling and discouraging. They often said things about me that made me feel like I didn't deserve love. We inherit a lot of trauma from our families and I'm so glad you found support in therapy to deal with some of the messages you received.

[@4mydearlady]

I know this video is old but when Stefan said, “When I went to pick her up, I had to pick her up around the corner,” I felt that. My daughter can relate to that. She is Black. Her boyfriend is Korean. She picks him up from work and when she would drop him off, it was down the street. At first, his mother knew about their relationship but not his father. My daughter is only 17 and she told her boyfriend, “If we have to sneak around, I don’t want to date you anymore.” The guy was upset when he heard that so he bravely confessed at the risk of being on the receiving end of his father’s wrath. I was proud of the son for doing that! I’m sure that wasn’t easy. He’s an only son and he’s 18 living at home, not a college grad on his own. His academic life is stellar too. He’s a National Merit Scholar. His father was NOT happy to hear that his son is dating a Black girl. However, he said, “You are 18. Keep your grades up. Treat her well. Treat her family well.” That was all he said. My daughter has not met the Dad yet. In the meantime, I agree best not to sneak around.

[@marianafavela8527]

I needed to hear this badly. Have been fighting this battle for the past 2 years and feel beyond exhausted and defeated. This gave me hope ❤

[@leoniek.7204]

My parents disapprove of my relationship because my guy works in a warehouse and customer service (not a good job, no money, ect...). Plus they would probably disapprove of him because of the way he looks. But I don‘t care, because I can make my own money and I don‘t give a damn about how he looks❤️ he makes me so happy and laugh a lot and honestly that‘s worth more to me than looks or money any day❤️

[@kpgirly2340]

I love your video and how you break down everything. I'm actually currently in the same situation as you. My boyfriend is American and I'm Chinese. My parents absolutely hates my boyfriend without even meeting or seeing him but when they found out he was a foreigner, who studies economic and finance, does not study medicine or sciences that isn't the same field. I'm already turning 20 this year, still they treat me like a kid. My mom has been worst where she took his phone number while I was sleeping and messaged him on her phone telling him to stop bothering me. It just really bothers me, how rude and disgusting their behaviour are towards him. Especially, I'd get some type of abuse from her. Mostly verbal abuse and her brainwashing me he's terrible and isn't the guy he says he is without proof as well as a recent physical bruises on my body. Been trying to search for help and resources and I just came upon this video. Just thank you so much for making this video. Just means a lot and that no matter what the situation is, you are choosing for yourself and that if you love the person you're with and both are willing to commit. Then I think stay together and not let go. I'm doing LDR as well so there was a bit of a difference but we both made it work for each other.

[@MonicaKang21]

So relatable!! Thanks for sharing Letitia 💕

[@letitiakiu]

Thank you for stopping by Monica!

[@therightkindofpen]

The live chat was fun! Thanks for sharing, L and S.

[@letitiakiu]

Thank you so much for being a part of it! 💕💕💕

[@elizabethgarcia1350]

This hits hard .. And I can relate my parents never approved of my boyfriend at the time ( he's my husband now) and they never really had a good reason on why I fell in love with him and could see a future with him but my parents never really wanted me to go on dates with him or see him she even tried to get a restraining order on him my dad hated him they got my uncles and aunts to dislike him and it hurts to see that your own blood doesn't want to see you happy with the person you love ❤ I was about to give in at one point because it was too much but it was the worst heart ache I ever had I couldn't do it and he couldn't leave me either I finally had enough and decided to move out and live with him I cut off ties with them and moved on I am now 2 years happily married with our first son ❤ and couldn't be happier

[@saraa3797]

Hi, this situation seems similar to the one I'm in right now. My parents both hate my boyfriend and say that they will never let me be with him. Like they're going to try and stop me actively. My dad says if he ever sees him with me he will push him away from me etc. I'm in a long distance relationship and I still live with my parents. I am really worried my parents will try and stop me from moving out for fear I move in with him. I have already made the decision to stick with my boyfriend no matter what and that will never change. I was just wandering if there was any advice you could give me for the moving out process. And how did you tell your parents you were going to live with your boyfriend. If you don't mind saying, how old were you when you moved out? I'm sorry for all these questions it's just this story seems to be similar to mine and you have chose to stay with your boyfriend. :)

[@elizabethgarcia1350]

@@saraa3797 I feel you very much it hurts to see the people whom we love very much are the first hurt us. When I moved out it was very ugly I believe my parents were narcisstic because it seemed as if they cared more about my virginity than me it was so bad my dad humiliated me infront of my uncles family asking if I was still a virgin i felt very disrespected and shocked and that's when I made up my mind and decided to leave but to my surprise the next day or 2 days later I think I came home to my mom yelling at me and forcing me to take a pregnancy test but thankfully I was on the phone with at the time boyfriend (husband) he heard me screaming and he called the cops they came just in time I had enough packed my bags and said I wasn't coming back and that was it it was very hard and became very sad but my husband always held me up ❤ my honest advice to you is follow your heart but be smart have your own money in case of anything it will be hard but you gotta be firm in your decision. If your legally an adult there's nothing they can do to stop you but if you wanna leave without causing any conflict or avoid abuse just leave at a time when they aren't home I left when I was 18 when I talked to the cop I was shocked my mom lied to me saying legal age to leave the house was 21 which was a big fat lie he said you can leave as early as 16 but I think it depends which state you live in. If your family really loves you they will eventually accept the fact that you've made up your mind to be with your boyfriend ❤

[@saraa3797]

@@elizabethgarcia1350 oh I'm sorry to hear that:(. It must have been very embarrassing for you. My parents really want what's best for me and they think my boyfriend is a bad for me so they're really set in their ways about trying to force us to separate. I know they love me a lot and have my best interests at heart so it makes it harder to move away from them. I feel like they're going to be really hurt and think I'm selfish for not siding with them since they do so much for me. But they don't understand that I love my boyfriend. They seem to think he's manipulated me into staying with him. Which is completely untrue but it's extremely hard to convince them otherwise. I hope you're safe and happy, thankyou so much for the thoughtful reply. It means a lot, you've given me so much hope ♡

[@elizabethgarcia1350]

@@saraa3797 yes that's true parents want the very best for their kids and I understand that but there's a limit some of the things my parents did were not normal at all but they werent always like that they were loving at times but sometimes I would question they're love just be careful and be 100% sure of your choice don't ever let anyone interfere in your love life only you know who you want to spend the rest of your life with ❤

[@saraa3797]

@@elizabethgarcia1350 sorry for the late reply I'm just worried about this one thing. I hope it doesn't upset you. How did you cut off your parents? Did they try and contact you again? Are they hurt by your choice? I'm worried because I really don't want to hurt my parents. I don't want to cut them off either but I'm scared they're going to be really hurt by my choice or maybe even try and harass us when I do leave. ♡

[@laughalotXD]

Thank you so much for sharing your story letitia! I've recently ended my interracial relationship because my mum didn't speak to me for two months as she did not approve of my bf. What you said about doubting myself really resonated with me. I hope one day I'll have the strength to stand up to my parents for what i believe in but for now, you guys are my inspiration.

[@letitiakiu]

Thank you for sharing your story! I hope you find peace within yourself, even if you are unable to find it with your mom. Stay strong!

[@pagethreemodel]

I'm sorry I think your mum is selfish as hell. You shouldn't forgo your happiness to keep someone happy. She should WANT you to be happy. In fact she should be able to put aside her own ignorances for your happiness. Esp if your ex was a good one.

[@nancynguyen1346]

I can relate to everything in this video! My bf and I have been dating for almost 3 years. I’ve tried having conversations with my mom about our relationships and she is adamant that it won’t work and won’t explain as to why besides the cultural and religious differences. At least meet the guy but she chooses to be close minded and ignore that he exists in my life. I’m starting to accept as you said that they just will never come around.

[@raspberryfaace]

I’m going through this, except I’ve only dated my white boyfriend (my first boyfriend) for 9 months. The first few months were really tough because I felt such a heavy burden on my shoulders sneaking around and keeping it from my parents... but my mom and her weird mother’s instincts found out I was hiding something/someone. I am sooooo guilty of the foot out the door syndrome- I would find any and every reason to break up with him because it would be a win/win situation if it wasn’t meant to be. But I realized that really wasn’t fair for my boyfriend. It’s also tough because white people will never fully understand the issue (he also was like “let me just meet them, they will see that I’m a good person”). Anyway, I finally told my mom and she advised not to tell my dad. She’s still in denial and said I’m just “experiencing new things”. But I felt soooo much better after telling her. Ughhh sorry for ranting but I relate to this so much. I’m hoping I can find my happiness and peace.

[@letitiakiu]

YESSS. I know things have worked out in our favour, so Stef still believes that just talking to my parents have convinced them that he is good. But it doesn't always work out that way. I do believe it is a cultural thing. MY PARENTS DID THE SAME THING, where they think that I'm just experiencing puppy love. Fast forward 12 years later and now it's lolworthy haha

[@eggyjo]

Your relationship is so sweet!! I STAN

[@letitiakiu]

Thank you 😘

[@truelove7751]

I relate to this so much. My parent’s are the same. A ring is a whole other beast. I can’t control my parents and I can’t help how they feel. Don’t think my parent’s will ever accept my relationship. It IS HORRIBLE to have to hide my relationship. I hate myself for lying to them. think it’s disrespectful to my boyfriend, but even though he doesn’t like it, he says you have to do what you have to do. He supports me emotionally either way, and he never says anything negative about my parents.... but I think if he would put more effort into spending time with them like they want, it could help... but in the end it would not stop the criticisms they have of him.

[@thrilloftheluxe4542]

Thank you for sharing your experience, not alot of people have the courage to share these types of issues. I'm in a similar situation and feel terrible about it because I had such a close relationship with my parents and now it's just not the same. My hubby is such a big part of my life and it's hard to reconcile that I won't have that happy family I had envisioned. Just going to work on coming to terms that I can't change how a person feels. Thanks again for sharing!

[@letitiakiu]

Thank you for sharing your story! You can have a happy family. I believe you can choose your family 💜

[@_Bishaka]

Going through the same thing

[@Annadtq]

My past relationships were interracial and my mom disapproved hard. She's happy i'm dating a Chinese boy now, but she would be much happier if he was Vietnamese...but I'm happy and that's all that matters.

[@letitiakiu]

Happy for you Anna!

[@pekozelenovic7233]

it dosent matter who you date or merry always listin to your heart not your parents even if your still a teenager or an adult still listin to your heart

[@rimano3922]

@@pekozelenovic7233 but the heart can trick u sometimes and u wouldn't see the reality that would first hit after kids come into the picture. Am i wrong?!

[@emeljurd3231]

You’ve got a good man there! 👏👏🤸🏽‍♀️🤸🏽‍♀️🎉🎉💖💖

[@lusshhh77]

I have this problem now, my parents disapprove of my relationship of 5 years. My bf and parents met once and it was a bad first impression (they weren't planning on met, took my parents by surprise). Ever since then my parents will not met him, ask me about him or even care to get to know him. I kinda did what you did Letitia, I learned to accept that my parents won't accept him.... yet, hopefully. I gets me discourage especially this time of the year when everyone is able to spend time with their significant other and the families but after watching this video it made me be thankful I have a patience boyfriend too. Thank you for sharing your story !

[@letitiakiu]

I'm happy for you Brenda! I know around the holidays it can feel isolating. We had many years of spending time apart. Hopefully it will be better in the future!

[@xovicc9426]

Im Asian and my parents really don't care if the person I date is a different ethnicity, as long as they treat me right, care about me, and isnt a bad influence. I'll never understand why parents are against the people their children date just because of their ethnicity/race... like atleast get to know them first before you judge :/

[@sabrinapayal6101]

AWWW I SO RELATE ♥️ I feel you on the fob parents 😓 just subbed 🥰

[@MissStephieTing]

Thank you for being so transparent! You guys are awesome. Oddly enough the gas is back at 1.18 😔😅

[@juula9469]

I really feel with you, Im kind of in a similar situation, my parents judge everything my boyfriend does so hard, they treat him like the neighbours son who comes around to play, they dont say it openly but they seem to be happy, or whatever else.

[@puiirenthlei4874]

Just yesterday i told my mom about my 2 and half years relationship. I thought she will understand me but she told me to break up with him. I was so sad but i don't have any intention to break up with him.

[@sheilacastillo3988]

Your advice made me feel much better. I totally feel you because my family is not supportive as well me being in an interracial relationship. I love my family but it hurts not to have the support from them. How did you stay financially stable and how did you stay peace with yourself for your own happiness without feeling any guilt for making your own decisions without your parents approval?

[@kpoplover1901]

Thank you for this. I'm in an interracial/interreligious relationship (though our cultures and religions are similar in values lol) and I have issues of abandonment, one foot out the door, just being anxious when I think about how much my family will hate my partner bc of how racist and prejudiced they are. I realized I can't hold it out any longer and I need to start going to therapy because I know these are issues I personally have that will manifest in other ways even if not this relationship. Sometimes I'm honestly just with my boyfriend and happy and then I get so upset thinking that I could be happy in that moment meanwhile I could lose it all bc of what people will say, my family, outsiders, etc. My friends who know me and have met him a little do like him and see hes a decent person. But half of them keep asking me if its worth the mental struggle I have right now to keep going on with him. Honestly he doesn't have red flags and the flaws he does have are things he actively tries to work on. I have so many flaws too and I'm going to address them. I can't be an adult and letting people's perceptions of me ruin my life. But yeah thank you very much for posting this video. My mother was so upset with me just proposing the idea of dating him and now I'm realizing maybe she'll never get over it.

[@Frannyp4ck]

I'm excited about this series! My boyfriend and I are high school sweet hearts and have been together 7 years. It's not so common for young couples to be together that long and not be married so I'm happy to see a similar relationship.

[@letitiakiu]

Yes! We're on the same boat. It will be interesting to see how our stories may develop together.

[@Madribabez]

Me too! So lovely to know that other people are still together, I barely know anyone else who is still with their high school sweetheart

[@judahjoy7247]

Wooww i needed this.. Thnx alot🥰

[@REVIEWSONTHERUN]

Great story. Thanks for sharing..✌️

[@letitiakiu]

Thanks for stopping by!

[@sunvavachi]

This was nice to hear. Keep strong. I haven't been able to open about mine too my parents regards to any person. It's very hard and especially when I'm ready to be with someone. I can't even open about dating. Your lucky you could do that, even if arguing lol. It does break one down and makes one focus on relationships too much. Parents need to grow up to the new century. I'm 31 and my parents are still not even open for me talking of relationships. And I'm trying to be independent financially til I break the tie if it worsens. :(...sucks cuz I'm am trying to get into post grad in US where my guy is. And it's so hard. We both are struggling and I hope him and I come together finally. Your man's partner both white/Guyanese culture are very open. Pure Asian and South Asian it's tough, it's not easy. There are beautiful things about our cultures, I like how we view marriage and yeah.

[@letitiakiu]

Having to deal with family and a long distance relationship must be very difficult. I hope you and your partner get to be together soon! Best of luck 💙

[@sunvavachi]

@@letitiakiu thank you! Yes it's been a journey. My parents are SO loving and giving but when it comes to this topics it's been a bitch haha. Thank you for your wishes I appreciate it.

[@mara_jeon]

Thanks for sharing your thoughts and story 💟

[@KatMarie]

very interesting! enjoyed hearing your story. as always, thanks for sharing :)

[@letitiakiu]

Thanks for watching as always Kat!

[@moochimichimoo]

Omfg my parents are exactly the same as yours, Letitia! It's not even about race for me because i brought home a Chinese boy once but my parents flipped out and I have been scarred from the multiple arguments. i'm now too scared to go out and date until I've graduated from University. I guess i will hv true freedom then

[@writer1342]

Hey🙂 thanks for this im going through a lot rn ..my parents are african and pretty much have the same cultural Outlook as you described..im having to keep my relationship hidden bc my family disapproves, refuses to even meet my boyfriend and calls him a crazy man bc he struggles with mental health problems (from an unstable early childhood) . They tell me I should have run away from him bc of that and criticize my decisions and tell me I'm with him bc I'm insecure and don't know how to be around good people.. they basically told me if I pursue the relationship or end up marrying him they will never come around me or kids if i have any..we have been together close to 2 years and he has helped me financially, emotionally in any way he could when i was going through family stuggles including my parents threatening to disown me of i didn't blow off work and come home for months when the coronavirus started and then cutting me off when I eventually left and went back to live at my apartment .I'm tired of hiding and it's hurt him slot that i hid our relationship but to me it was better bc it lessened the drama and i enjoyed it more... someone give me some hopeful words or advice in the comments plz

[@drew856856]

I would choose my sopose over my family and friends any day. Your spouse is your family now. Whoever can't respect that then it's their loss. But you two understand that. I wish you a happy life together.

[@juliazhou692]

I relate a lot but the only difference is that I am actually from China (I came as an international student and been living in canada for many years and hoping to receive PR soon and I met my Nigerian boyfriend here) but my entire family are still in China. They disapprove hard and also cus my mom went through a horrible divorce with my dad, so she thinks that I’m choosing to do this to her, and that I’m selfish and ungrateful child. She was okay that I wanna permanently live here but now that I’m am “doing this to her” now she wants me to come home. Or else I’ll be abandoning her. Her reasoning is purely bc of race and she’s very well aware of that but she dosnt wanna change her views. I know if I ever do what she wants me to do and conform to her insanely problematic values, then I’ll be not who I am anymore, actually ill become everything that’s opposite of my own values. I grew up in China so my mom thinks Ive changed (in a bad way), but I’m proud of my change, it’s growth, it made me a much more mature, open, and confident person but she dosnt understand at all. I often still feel extremely guilty of what’s happening of the situation. It is very difficult to try to communicate with my mom, and I don’t know if she will ever understand my point of view. But I guess now I just need to try hard and try to accept the fact that she will never accept us or accept me. I feel bad for what she’s going through but I’ve been extremely open and patient to her but I have not see anything reciprocated. I honestly don’t know what to do. Thank you for your video, i knew it’s not an uncommon thing but it still feels very alone. Thanks for all the kind strangers who read through all this lol hope your situation is not as shitty as mine.

[@jihanela9062]

You are describing my current situation, I had to move back home, and now my mom wouldn’t let me live anywhere outside my country. I feel trapped. I hope our situation gets better.

[@Althea6212]

I’m Chinese I’m in the same situation as you. Can you update and let us know how things have been going for you? I’m in so much dilemma right now.

[@MelisaBaydemir]

GIRL I relate so much honestly. My dad is Turkish and him and my mum have never been accepting of me and my Fiance. We got engaged last year and my parents hated it. It's just difficult because they have never wanted to be involved in our relationship and it has caused me to doubt and to question my decision making. It makes me want to hide, but obviously being engaged its harder now- but I'm just happier that we are close to living together so hopefully that will make things better.

[@SarahKPN]

My parents are also Turkish and they never approved of me dating in the first place, let alone dating outside of our race... People always say "it's your life, do what makes you happy, not your parents" but I financially depend on them, and they have a lot of control over my life in general... So I'm scared they will blackmail me into not seeing him again, or treat him badly... While he and his family have been the most understanding and kind people for the past 5 years...

[@sharonmason6456]

I’m in a similar situation. I do think me and my bf are a little older than y’all, I’m now 29 and he’s 32. We have been dating 2 years and 3 months. We’re both white, but my parents are older and very conservative. I have Asian friends and their parents are basically the same as mine in their traditions. My dad has never liked my bf. At first my mom didn’t either. My dad has always let me know he couldn’t stand him. My bf drives a truck. Last year I was going to go on a trip with him 1200 miles away from home In the truck over our 1 year anniversary and his birthday. He come to get me at my house and my dad came out yelling and screaming telling bf he hates him and could kill him etc. told me if I went he would kick me out of the house. Bf told my dad if that’s the way he wanted to be then fine I was a adult and could make up my own mind and if he kicked me out then he would find us a place to stay. Anyway I went with bf and mom had a long talk with dad and dad realized he was wrong. Now a little over a year later my mom is fine with my bf. My dad still don’t like him, but he has accepted it. My bf has helped me when my car was broke, give me money when I need it. And my dad sees that he takes care of me and makes sure I’ve got what I need. We’re wanting to get a house married soon etc just trying to find the right place and the right time. My dad knows it’s coming, and I think he’s ok with it. I’m not sure what it is with dads when their “little girl” is with someone, even in their late 20s. He’s got to realize she’s not a little girl anymore, but I guess it’s hard for them. My bf now will come around some but not very often, and I don’t blame him after the way my dad did. I’m curious to see how dad changes when grandkids are involved.

[@criso7947]

Love the video and i love the sweater you are wearing.

[@letitiakiu]

Thank you Cris!

[@loreenaducharme4340]

I've experienced disapproval, and yes I made mistakes at the time they met my boyfriend, but I learnt a long time ago to live only for myself. I listened to what my parents and aunts and nana had to say, but at the end of the day, it was my choice. I let the comments slip off my shoulders and knew that they could never understand until they were willing to. I waited 4 years before they met again and my family finally turned around and liked him. I also reminded myself that it was quite hypocritical that my boyfriend was getting criticized when they were the ones that got divorced and experienced hardships far greater than ours.

[@letitiakiu]

Agreeeeeeedddd! 100% I felt very distrustful of their opinion when I saw so many couples around me who couldn't even communicate with their partners. I'm glad things worked out for you and your boyfriend Loreena!

[@LifeRNhungrynursetravels]

This is all too disturbing. I feel for you guys. Both of you. Stephen, legit had to deal w a lot of stuff. I think the main thing is that you finally accepted and stopped trying to impress your parents. Congrats. Happy for you both.

[@ju5tine]

Thank you for this.

[@missluohua]

Your video is so inspiring. It made me so emotional. I did the same thing as you did dating my boyfriend in secret. Hiding it from my parents and lying to them. My parents told me that they would abandon me if I did not break up with him. Due to this we kept our relationship going on in secret. On top of that we have a LDR he lives in the uk and I live in the Netherlands. The love for each other kept the LDR going. I am so depressed and anxious it can’t go longer then this anymore. I just dont know what to do anymore really

[@writer1342]

I'm going through the exact same thing as you girl, I'm having to secretly meet and it's just so draining..my parents also told me weeks ago if you don't delete his number and leave him you can leave the house and i don't want to know you anymore

[@missluohua]

@@writer1342 I feel your pain and struggles. I really hope that things will work out for you guys. Keep strong

[@MrMentalz2]

My parents where surprised when they found out my gf was not the same race as me but what did they expect when they put me in a country and an area which is predominately white. I was like one of only 3 kids in my school who was black lol

[@letitiakiu]

Lol ya I wonder if my parents ever thought about what would happen to me and my sister growing up in Canada.

[@annabelleyee6199]

what a difficult topic to talk about! thanks for opening up and sharing your story, I completely relate with your experience with asian parents

[@jetli80]

I know this is old video, but I’m in similar boat as you. Only difference is it’s an 4 year age gap and her social status that parents don’t approve of. I know there are other people that go through similar cases, but like you said you really feel you are alone in this. You are right, sometimes you just have to let go.

[@valentinabg09]

Oh god this is my situation. My boyfriend is, objectively, an amazing man. He is not jealous, doesn't drink, he's intelligent, hard-working, respectful, doesnt swear, we impulse each other be a better human being and professional, everyone is happy we're together because they think we deserve each other and my mother is just like... He's ugly and comes from a poor family. She'll roll her eyes at him and say nasty things about him all the time. He doesn't resent her, though. I just know I'm with someone who's worth it and time will tell. My mom is a very difficult person and I accept her like that, I'm just not going to mix my relationship with my family

[@kirthiga8195]

YOU TWOOOOO

[@letitiakiu]

FOOT OUT ONE DOOOORR

[@MoonIceDream]

I'm going through the same exact situation and it hurts. They refuse to meet him and they believe he's going to be bad for me. They believe I'm destroying my life. And I understand their worries and their concerns and I also see their concerns had happened to others. But me and my boyfriend are willing to fight for each other and make our relationship work. We don't know what's going to happen in the future. We don't know what is the right answer. But we want to be happy and we see a happy future together at the end of the road even if it'll have obstacles in it that will break us. Because we believe we are stronger together.

[@jennthach7569]

That’s the same with my relationship. My parents don’t approve of my boyfriend even though we have been going out for 6 years. But they didn’t approve of my other boyfriends either and even my guy friends my parents were weird around.

[@letitiakiu]

Yesssss my parents are that way as well. Regardless of race, they were sketched out by it. They were really nice to my guy friends so it made me mad actually, to see that they are capable of treating my circle with respect

[@bellezabeauty1]

I just began to seriously date my Black boyfriend, although I am so in love I do not think my parents will approve which is sad. I think this is very common in Mexican culture yet it breaks my heart.

[@SalsaConT]

Did it work out, sis?

[@ChinoChiinoo]

I totally relate with you! Except, my mom was the only one who disapproved with me having a boyfriend. My mom was very mean with my boyfriend when she realized how serious I treated my relationship. It's a bit better now LOL She sometimes is super nice to him and sometimes she's not. It's very hot and cold, similar to a menopause if that makes sense LOOOOOL

[@strawberrigurl19]

THIS IS MY MOM TOO!! It's super annoying

[@ChinoChiinoo]

@@strawberrigurl19 YASSSS! The struggles of overprotective asian moms!

[@letitiakiu]

I can see how that would happen! Your mom is growing to accept your boyfriend, but there will always be small things that can ignite her worries about whether her child is making the right decision. When she is being cold is really a sign that she is fearful, and it might be helpful to reassure her that he is a good guy ❤

[@Jennifo007]

Im going through the same thing right now. I’ve been talking to someone my friend introduced me for 3-4 months. The guy came down on my birthday, the second time he came again and it felt awkward. This past Sunday, he came down and we had the greatest time. I told my mom and my moms like so against him because he has a child. So far he’s a good guy, he treats me right. I feel like there’s more to a relationship than being treated right though. I just wish my parents would like him because my parents never liked any of my exs

[@MoonLight-ed1su]

I'm Tunisian my boyfriend is Korean he visited me in Tunisia and also lived with my family for few days traveled together had so much fun and nice experiences with my parents, grandparents, cousins, siblings, uncles... they all liked him but my mom was warning me to be in a relationship with him. They treated him well because they didn't know that he's my bf. So for that I kept secret from them my relationship with him. Just a few cousins and friends understood me and stayed by my side. But until now my family still thinks that we are just bestfriends and they don't want to see any improvement in our relationship ( friendship).

[@MoonLight-ed1su]

I broke up with him already.

[@yolandelyle]

We are many in this universe!! Likewise,I am half British and half African,and my husband is Filippino/ Japanese. His mother and my mother, outright shows us that they do not want anything to do with us!! Both my husband and I never get any kind of moral support from any of them!! In spite of all this,both my husband and I are very happy,content and loving couple. And now for us,we don't care whether they are with us or not,because we are so happy and peaceful with our lives❤️

[@missybe3238]

I am Haitian and my bf is Kenyan. We are both black yet my parents still oppose it :/. It doesn't help that he is catholic and I am protestant. They always mention it underhandedly . It's frustrating

[@littlebitofmonika9035]

Same situation here :'( me and my partner decided to stick together and fight for the relationship.

[@demanskytubaholdingsco3277]

My friend is American black and his wife is Hatian. Who cares. All I know is every Hatian woman I have ever met has been gorgeous! I don't give a rat's behind what country a woman is from as long as she is Christian and gorgeous.

[@teddyx2364]

My mom tried to disapprove my half Caucasian half Persian bf, but I told and showed her how awesome he is as a person and how nice he is to me. Eventually she gave up :P

[@jenwylie4093]

I dated my now husband for about 3 1/2 years before I met his parents. His parents were a different religion, and he wasn't ready to deal with everything that goes along with that until we were ready to get married. His dad was ok with us being together, but I'm not so sure about his mom. We have been married for 13 years now, and recently had a baby, but she has made next to no effort to meet the baby. I'm glad my parents were excepting of us being together. It does help to have a group of people who can see past race or religion.

[@sprinklez057]

Word for word what I’m going through now. Thank you so much for this. My parents are disapproving of my African American boyfriend and I’m Ghanaian American. We look the same, but different cultures, even though I grew up in America.

[@letitiakiu]

Asians can be like that too! Depending on what part of Asia you are, there are still things they can discriminate against you.

[@tahliah6691]

Caribbean parents frown greatly upon their children dating African Americans Africans and asians.... they don't even like their children marrying or dating from other islands apart from their own...depends on which part of the caribbean. its sacrilege......

[@kritishadeka3018]

My mom doesn't want me to suffer like she did cuz his mom is lil.. Yk.. Strict(?) We're in college and are serious about our relationship. My mom doesn't approve of him cus we're the same age and our thoughts don't really match that much! It's really difficult for me to even meet him or go out at night, even if not with him, I have to hear a lot! Sarcasm, mockery, scoffing and all.. At times it just suffocates me

[@patlayla]

My parents don't like my BF,1st reason my mom want me to "focus on school" and 2nd dad doesn't like him because of his age ,dad and I rarely talk..... About anything and I don't like how dad changed towards me ,and I don't believe mom's reason "because of school" 😕

[@chloechan3849]

feels excruciating for me when my parents say horrible things about him. He and I are both interracial couples too, and they think that he’s harmful for me. We’re actually in a long term relationship and for me , he’s the nicest guy compared to the guys whom I’ve dated before . My mom will sometimes blame me for affecting her working life, my dad be making me feel guilty for hurting them. I was like you too, lying to my parents about it just to spend more time with him but one day I was caught and I felt depressed about it till now . I get that it’s hard to change their minds but I wonder how on Earth I can convince them because it hurts to see your loved ones hating the person you love so much :,) thus my boyfriend has been texting my mom to beg her to accept him because he really loves me . It hurts me to see the hurt in his eyes whenever my mom says no :,)

[@p.r.9982]

You're extremely brave. Therapy is a huge taboo in asian cultures (I know you're canadian, but I'm speaking of the cultural heritage). Wow. P.S. you mentioned HK but you look korean. Are you of korean descent by any chance ?

[@letitiakiu]

I am full Chinese, but I do get Korean all the time!

[@chihoshi]

Hi, I need advice.. I was willing to let go of my parents' approval and he knew that. But he got stressed and hurt and vented towards our relationship. He decided he didnt want to nake me chose. We have broken up but a mutual breakup, because of mainly external factor, and not a lack of love.. makes it so hard. It definitely hurts because you still miss the person and you arent sure if you will make a mistake and you cant love the next person as much. It hurt me a lot that my parents didnt trust my choices and never gave him a chance. And it hurts him so much. We werent even schooling kids. We were adults. He earned an income and they griped that he had no college degree. We work near each other and he still looks beautiful to me. We both still look to each other and avoid each others eye contact at the same time. It really sucks. And some times Im upset he wasnt able to hold on and be patient for us. In their fear of losing me, they pushed me away. I became withdrawn at home ever since. Is there any hope in this? I do know he has to be the one to reach put because he needs to be certain he can handle his feelings of hurt..

[@nomaichi]

you showed them! *car high-five thing* but seriously, good for you for standing up to it - very inspirational! my brother and i assumed things would eventually iron out for you - we felt that it was "growing pains" for the children and the parents. we're really happy for you :) (and of course my brother likes to have some fun at stefan's expense)

[@letitiakiu]

LOL STEFAN CAN TAKE IT

[@nomaichi]

@@letitiakiu Stefan is such a good sport and a sweetheart. :)

[@nouchivang6845]

sighs. This is just one of my fears when i am to come up to my parents. I'm Asian and days before i even told my parents. "What if i dated someone on the outside of our race?" I asked my mom that and she responded things as if it seems to be a no... then she told my step dad and they made horrible comments, it was part of skin, and.. not able to "communicate" to each other just because whoever i date isn't our race.. so i just came to search these kind of videos for opinions and i wasn't the only one who is wrong.. and idk what to do.. there's this guy that i like and he is white, he's very nice, funny, and one of the reliable, we even have similar history, thoughts, and we dated before but we ended it, well i did because i knew that my parents wouldn't really approve?? or maybe i was thinking too much but i knew that my parents would be that way.. it's hard to explain.. idk what to do, and i really wanna go out with him but i have feeling that he's scared of going out again, i just wanna tell him how i felt but i think i'm gonna wait until we both recover.. but i'm scared for my parents response, can i make my own decision? Love is love and idk what to do.. i need help

[@katebitancur9272]

i am going through this situation right now. but i am curious how or what's the situation you have at home with your parent, knowing that you're still continuing your relationship without their approval.

[@roseescobar2442]

How did your parents accept him later on in the future? I’m going through the same thing my parents don’t like my boyfriend without even meeting him and he wants to take me out on a date this Friday and he wants to met my parents getting to know each other

[@charntellecooper5812]

I am going through same kind of thing my boyfriend parents don't want to meet me my boyfriend is asian and I am British but my boyfriend was born in UK and raised in UK but they don't want to meet me or get know me because I don't have job aslo have a learning difficulties they don't even want to meet me and get know me all they care about if I have job and how smart you are is been soo stressful some days I feel like bursting into tears 💜