PT2: Why we haven’t had KIDS!!!

[@lovenakabba9185]

My mom has 4 kids. She had us because kids are a blessing and that’s what she’s supposed to do when you’re married. But she couldn’t afford them, we absolutely struggled emotionally, physically, financially. I had to give up my childhood to take care of all her kids. Please don’t have kids unless you are absolutely ready, want to, and know you can take care of them.

[@b2772]

We don't think about all this necessary things that comes after childbirth. Some parents gave up so much in their live just so they can afford the best for their child/children. Honestly if our grandparents, our parents ,or even some of us out there knew this all before popping out all this innocent life surely most children wouldn't have gone through such hardship. If we come to think it this present generations have different mindset. compared to our days.

[@jeorjitakornu]

Thanks for sharing

[@ldenisedavis]

I agree! Have what you can afford! Children’s are expensive & time consuming! I’m sorry you lost so much, but you gained a valuable lesson to pass on to others.

[@Vanemonda]

Absolutely right. Am working so hard to take care of my siblings , mum was a single parents and now she is late and I am jobless schooling myself and the other 4 who not only come with stress but also drain me to be a mom and father figure at my early age. This is draining guys. I have no childhood memories, no teenage memories, and now my young adulthood is still messed up with responsibilities that I didn’t subscribe to. I cannot have a life of my own because I have to think of school fees for them, I have to sacrifice my masters program for them. Kindly take it so serious and normalize bringing kids to this world when you financially, mentally stable to raise them without putting a burden to people.

[@b2772]

@ihineyvane1781 keep pushing, and I pray May God continue to give you strength to look your 6 you families, and may you desire the best yourself and your families. The childhood memories you didn't experience may your family experience theirs and be always grateful, and should they not take it for granted. All the best in life, my dear 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏.

[@tariroyashesithole3084]

"God is a planner. Why would you not be a planner? "This hit me so hard!

[@rhodaonuwaje]

Same here.

[@nthatijermina926]

Very🎉❤

[@csdcreations]

FACTS

[@justifiedcrown9669]

It took you this long to know this? 😂🤣

[@bonolom.c]

You know what? I love this video and the topic in general. My mother had me at the age of 22 and she never got to live her life or find herself. I am 20 years old this year and my mom is going to parties almost every weekend and neglects my little brother and I and it has always kind of been like that. And it is kind of sad because she had me at the age of 22 and never got to follow her dreams because she was working jobs she hated because she wannet to make sure that we were fed. My dad on the other hand did not care much. My little brother and i had to be raised by multiple people with different opinions under the same roof. And now that I am 20 years old Icant even imagine myself having a child anytime soon. It is 2023 and people need to start thinking more critically before having kids.

[@tamaraali6651]

I have 7 kids that my husband and I wanted. We are able to give them a great life with tons of love. We married at 25 yrs. I had my first at 29 yr. and last child at 44 yr. We new from the start That we wanted a large family. However, I agree 100% with you guys Part 1 and Part 2 ( well maybe not the breast feeding part, I personally loved it) . All the points you bring up are well thought out and very true. Good luck with your journey you will make great parents if that’s what you decide.

[@ldenisedavis]

I thought Lamb’s take on breastfeeding was hilarious! He may not want the child on her breast long, but breast milk is the best for the baby. Ling can always pump the milk & bottle feed, since the “experts” say babies should get breast milk for at least 6 months up to a year.

[@2BOutspoken]

Yes, it's healthier but to get Lamb on board you need to take him to the market and show him how much formula cost. Breast milk is healthy, free, easy (readymade), and will help with weight loss as they take about 450 calories from your daily intake. Besides all that, it is the most awesome experience you will ever have.

[@josephinesobers7422]

Yes, the bonding is so important plus it's healthy for the child., on the other hand, feeding a child with formula is also bonding.. It's the parents choice.

[@sharon6981]

I’ve breastfed 4 kids. Still trying to wean the last baby off. I’ll choose to breastfeed any day over feeding my kids formula but WOW it’s exhausting. Beautiful, but draining, lol.

[@califgypsy]

He is thinking of la Leche babies. No need to breastfeed past 6 months to a year. His fear your body will change or a babies selfishness is not even funny. Money will obviously never be an issue for you. You live lavishly, breast feeding is the last thing to worry about.

[@Olivia_rosette]

I just started a KZbin channel for cash management and entrepreneurs , and I have so much ideas. Do you want to hear them

[@Emma_forever21]

And one of the main reasons for breastfeeding is to bond the and the mother, motherly love

[@candacebraxton7761]

I love how you ALWAYS compliment your wife. You guys show each other so much love !

[@angelaumoru1393]

I love the mindset you guys have and the fact that you don't speak over each other. It shows the respect you have for each other.

[@magdalenemartinez2618]

I've had five kids and raised them mostly by myself. They are a blessing in certain ways but they definitely did not bring money lol😅 they cost money. We survived but we didn't live lavishly by far. I love them greatly but I am grateful they are grown and know how to survive. But i wish I could've taught them more than survival. I tell most people don't do it if you can't do it right.

[@chellej4085]

Agree with you 💯

[@lanreworld]

I appreciate your honesty

[@Ellasfam1]

❤❤

[@moshowo4]

I have the same experience (5 children/single mom)…I could not have said it better. Though they are married, the same premise of “doing it the right way” applies here because if your heart, mind, spirit, isn’t in it equally- then I wouldn’t do. It’s not just a financial matter. Don’t get me wrong, I definitely love ALL of my children but if I had to do again with the knowledge I now have I would definitely not have done it in any way other than how they are explaining it…responsibly, thoughtfully, carefully - which translates to lovingly. The kids suffer through some form of trauma otherwise…even if only the trauma of “survival mode”. In my my opinion it is selfish to have kids before you are prepared - or for any other reason than to love them, cherish them and then let them fly.

[@julietspeace8186]

This why am just having 2 cause I want to be able to afford give them the best of life….. and people keep saying I should add more no way told my husband to get vasectomy good thing he did agree his done aswel

[@maureenwareham8822]

“Count your blessings. Life is full of lessons. Thank God for his mercy. We pray….” GREAT SONG OF ENCOURAGEMENT

[@staciaokeowo3216]

A teacher told our class once, “God said be fruitful and multiply, he didn’t say over-multiply.” I have always remembered that and taken it to heart because it’s true. Also, I think it’s important to have children at the right time, when you are mentally and financially stable. Many just have them because they can, but how many people pray to God to guide them. I heard a preacher say once that anytime you need to make a decision pray to God about it. Having children is something that requires much thought and prayer. Before my husband and I got married we agreed to have children, and earlier in our marriage my husband was eager to have children, but I wasn’t so much. First, I felt like we were still getting to know each other and I wanted time for just us. Then, I had to explain to him the financial commitment and how we were not ready. At the time I was the main breadwinner, and the job I worked at the time would only allow 60% of my pay during maternity leave. How would we make it with 40% of our money gone and yet we have a new life to care for…they can’t eat our food or wear our clothes. Also, when I returned to work who would care for our child? Care Child is very expensive, and you will pay someone a minimum of $8 per hour for the whole work day?! Ultimately my husband agreed that we were not ready. Since then I’ve heard him talking to others about truly being ready for children and how they must consider certain things.

[@CommonSenseSisters]

@Stacia Okeowo thank you so much for sharing your wisdom and common sense in this comment section!!!! It will not only open minds, but inspire so many people as well. You've sowed a good seed of wisdom to your spouse and he has gone to multiply it by sharing the wisdom as well. Simply amazing!!!!! THANK YOU!!!!!!!🤗🤗

[@fafonlu]

God does not say anything to anyone

[@staciaokeowo3216]

@@fafonlu He does through his Word

[@justifiedcrown9669]

Is this an English teacher?

[@novlettecauldwell4784]

I started having kids at age 20 and had my last one at 34. 4 girls. I always wanted a boy. Along with my 4 girls I also raised 2 step children. I never went to college but all my children did and are all gainfully employed in their careers of choice. Now I take care of my grandmother because she had two daughters (one was my mother) and they both died years ago. We have to take life one day at a time while planning for what you want. Nothing is a given 🇯🇲.Love you guys

[@TEEKO.]

Take your time guys, enjoy each others company…travel, see the world crate memories together. Everything will happen in it’s time and not before. ❤

[@sherilwray5559]

Having kids never came cheap, not even with a millionaire, kids need emotional and physical love.

[@serenawill128]

Just to let you guys know. You don't have to justify your life choices to anyone as long as it's not hurting anybody. 😊

[@jonblaze431]

Exactly,i was about to write the same thing,i love them but this is coming across as trying to push an opposing narrative to wanting or having kids,my son is my blessing bcos he changed me to be a better man so to me and many parents it's a bit spiteful to say kids are not blessings just bcos u don't seem to want one,they make a lot of good points tho but as my grand mother once told me...nothing will prepare u to become a parent,not even being financially sound

[@ochanyaoche9881]

@@jonblaze431 if truly you understand Ling & Lamb on this topic, you are actually the one doing what you are accusing them of..

[@FocusedM]

But then there’s no content 😅

[@niahluvsyu9630]

I just want to say thank you for both parts of the conversation. I feel like there’s constant pressure to become married and have kids before 30. It’s anxiety inducing how much pressure is placed on women and their uterus at times. Your conversation gave me the insight I needed to relax. Thank you for this Ling and Lamb ❤

[@briethompson439]

Really? I'm 37, successful and never felt any pressure. Or maybe I just paid no attention. Live your life girl

[@PED922]

@@briethompson439 how does it really feel though? Is it really as good or as bad as they say?

[@RoselineOsamwonyi]

"Lamb you are so annoying" ☺️☺️☺️☺️ Yeah he is! Word of wisdom: having it your way, seeing it your way, and saying it your way doesn't make it perfect! Some people would like to have a child and still maintain a good reason for doing so. I respect your decision. There's a parable in Africa that states " He who wears a shoe knows where it pinches"

[@siletamus2016]

Africa is not a country please say exactly where they say that in Africa.

[@nosajunior6076]

Just be specific about the country because Africa is a continent. Do not reduce Africa into a little piece of whatever.. Eg. You could easily say Edo State in Nigeria.

[@beautifulandsweet8826]

If you want or don’t want a baby, it is okay. If you want breastfeed or not, its okay. It is your life. The fact that you two have a great, loving, and fulfilling relationship is all that matters. You don’t have to include anyone else in it. All your points about what can possibly occurs between kids and parents are on point. Many times kids are not blessings but a headache. I am glad you are in total control of your scenario.

[@_Faatyymaang]

This conversation comes very helpful to me that I am about to get married. We've been discussing it with my fiancee that we don't really wanna have kids in the early years of our marriage. I'm definitely gonna share this video to him. Thank you, May God bless you.

[@Kay-Dean]

What's important is that both of you are happy. Do whatever makes you happy. My advice to everyone.

[@lungilemanungo3586]

I’m only 21 but this has been an eye opener to me. I’m still at uni and see myself getting married later on in my 20s and my mentality on kids was having them 2yrs after marriage so I could enjoy my marriage before the little minions but the financial part has opened me up more, I never thought about that aspect. Thank you so much Ling and Lamb❤

[@mbthdtv6842]

What if your partner wants them

[@ldenisedavis]

@@mbthdtv6842 Then she has to chose a partner that wants what she wants. She didn’t say she doesn’t want any. I think waiting some time is a great idea, before having kids. One they come, life revolves around them.

[@jameemcdoe]

I have loved this conversation! As someone who comes from a huge family & being one of the only ones who doesn’t desire to personally have kids. This is a topic that definitely needs to be had!

[@shemade9521]

I experienced a lot of hate when I decided to stay 2 years spending time getting to know whom I married before having kids. That’s the best decision I’ve made because 14 years later I know if we didn’t take the time to create that bond we would have been on our separate paths long ago. And again because we decided to only have one child. The pressure from family and friends intensified day after day. Unfortunately for them only a miracle would make us have another child because he had a vasectomy and I’m big on birth control. So it’s so sad to see how people are praying and wishing for you what you don’t want.

[@okarefolasade7283]

" unfortunately for them"....😂😂.... I love that.....❤ It amazes me how some people take panadol for someone else's headache😊.

[@okarefolasade7283]

Imagine the audacity!! 😂

[@Marshmellow4eva21]

In my marriage initially it was to have 2 children, afterwards the decision was made to just let it remain at 1 child. We kept getting asked over & over about when we were going to have another one 🙄🤦🏾‍♀️ Fast forward to 9 years of marriage, I was 35 and our daughter was 8 and my husband died sudden. Imagine if we had gone ahead with our initial plan of 2 or even went beyond that.😓 The emotional side alone is so hard to deal with, not to mention the financial side. In the words of Lamb I'm just here "Counting my blessings" because things could have been worse but God is good

[@courtneyschmidt985]

From one child free by choice couple to another - thank you!! We are both in our 30’s and have decided to make our decision permanent and couldn’t feel more sure about it! (And relieved 😉)

[@LingandLamb]

Have to what makes sense for you 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉

[@kells1784]

I'm 38, and people have been assuming I have had children from my twenties. I decided a couple of years ago that I didn't want any, and people still look at me like an alien lol. You's do what is right for you both 😊. Different courses for different horses and that's OK.

[@JustFluffyQuiltingYarnCrafts]

Seeing the love that you both share is enough. If children are your portion AND your desire they will come. Period. ❤❤

[@boobaby6430]

I breastfeed my baby (also pump) and it’s very good for their immune system. I have gotten sick 3 times since she’s been here (6 months) and she hasn’t been sick yet.

[@teresmajor6954]

@@marywanjiku208 Children who didn’t have moms to breastfeed them survived just fine too.

[@teresmajor6954]

@@marywanjiku208 You’re right. Maybe when the baby comes, Ling and Lamb might change their minds about the breastfeeding thing. But it is their choice to make, not ours.

[@olefben]

My girl breastfed for a year and it was awesome.

[@olefben]

@@teresmajor6954 survived, that's the word

[@teresmajor6954]

@@olefben Aren’t we all surviving?

[@knowledgeoflife7441]

Their love is pure for each other 💯🥂♥️♥️ i love watching them especially when the both blush about one another 🙏🏽🙏🏽🥳🎉

[@rityben4162]

As long as you and your partner are on the same page ❤ as for me and my husband, we are having 2 kids under 2 years of marriage and that’s our agreement. I have a 17 months old already and I’m having another baby next month 🎉❤Do you, others will adjust!

[@fionamolokomme4109]

Always keep this in mind, people tend to project their fears onto others. Your love is beautiful ❤ and I agree 100% with you that one should plan to have children and not just pop them out

[@melg9921]

Having children you can afford needs to be planned and absolutely sure that as a women you can financially manage to raise them independently if needs be. This is many womens reality and is being a responsible adult. my two sons who are both now in university are making their own way in the world. I'm so grateful they never had to suffer. You two have a beautiful relationship that radiates through the screen of my phone. You can see and feel the love you have for each other. You two have been truly blessed by god.

[@novlettecauldwell4784]

@melg9921 I agree with you 100%. My daughter has two children and their dad was one of the best I’ve ever seen. They both had thriving careers and taking care of their kids. Then the unthinkable happened- at the tender age of 34 he died in a car accident. My daughter didn’t plan on raising her kids alone but they are still in private school and their quality of life has not changed. Just saying that things can change in a split second. Plan for the “in case it’s”

[@michaeladickens6362]

Having children is up to you and your husband if you want kids and how many. What makes the two of you happy. Love the two ❤️ of you ❤️ 💕 ♥️ 💙

[@joyarchibong6492]

I keep learning from y’all….stay blessed Ling and Lamb.

[@deotio2768]

Listen MEN, women's breast are not just a sexual organ. Women have breast first and foremost so that they can breastfeed their babies!!! Breast milk is the healthiest food and natural medicine a baby can get and if you are able to you should breastfeed your child as long as you can and not on a man's timeline who thinks he's sexual desires are more important than keeping your baby alive and healthy. I can respect your not ready for children but the level of ignorance about being parents and having babies and the expectations is disappointing. It's easy to have a big mouth when you have never been pregnant or been a parent. Parenthood and Motherhood is VERY HUMBLING. If you ever get to be parents you will be in for a good shocking ride

[@KizzyC]

Ignorant person here is you. My friend's baby girl wouldn't take her breast but she took a bottle. She's healthy and practically a genius toddler. Breastfeeding is the best, but it's not a must.. Let people make their choices. You're probably not as happy living your perfectly knowledgeable life as they are.

[@flawed_yet_worthy]

@@marywanjiku208 I totally agree

[@charmainefrancis-thorney9917]

I cannot LOVE and ADMIRE you two anymore than I do now or else my heart is going to 'pop out' of my chest⚠️🤣🤣

[@YoutubeFabLifeOfJan1]

I agree!

[@manka2693]

I love how I can find people who relate with me in thinking when I share my opinion too with people they say I sound stupid I just love you both so much ❤❤❤❤

[@chimdinduglory4216]

I'm a young Nigerian lady, and all i can say is thanks to God for the both of you🌹🌹

[@angelatillman4323]

I agree. My friend has 4 children and she struggles terribly. Single mom. Only 1 of the dad's help. One is getting life in prison the other killed his self. I can't imagine how difficult it is to be in her shoes. I love her and she is an amazing mom , and person. I wish I could help her.

[@theruachencounter7420]

Their compliments to each other at the beginning is all I need for this entire season of my life.

[@themindsidea1127]

Alot of people hide their inability to hold themselves ACCOUNTABLE as "That's how God wants it". WOW!🙌🙌

[@favored6007]

How is them choosing to not have children right now mean they do not want to be held accountable? Accountable for what?

[@dee_g6864]

@@favored6007 That’s a quote from what Lamb said

[@teresaridge3228]

Lamb for wise man please listen . Your wife has to make her own decision. I think you will make great parents when is right time for you ❤ I love watching you both. I was blessed with 5 children and I fed my boys for month then stopped at 3months Then my daughter was sick and allergies so I fed her 18thmonths saved her life. For me it's a blessing and never thought children as money we had none. God bless you both ❤

[@angelatillman4323]

You are right. They leave the nest and get on with their lives. My son and I are very close. I am so grateful! He is the love of my life! But I don't see him all the time. He works, he is adad and has his own grown up problems

[@beachgirl9125]

You are the planners of your lives.Just because you can have children doesn’t mean you want to be a parent.And that makes all the difference ☮️💟

[@lifeaheadofus1651]

I am 39 and have no kids. So YOU KNOW that I get pressure from EVERYONE to have a child. Even strangers think that’s it’s ok to bring it to my attention that I’m not getting younger. They have no idea the hardships that I might have faced regarding this topic. Guys.. keep doing what your doing. You will have kids when YOU ARE ready. God have you your life to live. Only he knows the exact path you guys need to take. And he gave you wisdom enough to figure out which path that is. I agree 100% with you guys. Thank you for speaking out on this topic ❤

[@ldenisedavis]

What gets me is how En Vogue it has become to have kids outside of marriage! Parenting is challenging with two parents! Why people think it’s great to want to struggle by yourself with a/some kids is beyond me! I love my freedom & until God provides a husband, kids are the furthest thing from my mind, whether by birth or adoption!

[@lindabb7064]

@@ldenisedavis If you want to get married, good for you. Don't impose your values on others. Many couples and single parents are doing a good job, and married people with poor parenting. Marriage isn't a quality guarantee; a mature attitude is.

[@ldenisedavis]

@@lindabb7064 The funny thing is those values aren’t mine. They’re God’s. And since he’s omniscient, I’ll stick with His way of doing things. How do you define “a good job”?! There are plenty single parents that can meet basic need & some wants, but at what cost? True, some married ppl struggle to meet basic needs, which tells me they didn’t plan well for children. All I know is it takes two to get them here, so in the sight of God, something about a 2 parent, officially committed, sound household is a better environment to raise a child, than not.

[@flawed_yet_worthy]

@@ldenisedavis I totally agree with you

[@lindabb7064]

@@ldenisedavis Good for you to stick to God. Not everybody believes in Him, and not everybody has the same interpretation of the Scripture. Once again, don't project your reality onto others and mind your business. Other people's lives are theirs. It's not too late to learn others' boundaries and respect them. Those two actions meaning your faith and respecting others aren't mutually exclusive.

[@barbarad1144]

Lamb is too funny. He doesn't want to share Ling with anyone. At the end of the day, you, too, have to do what's best for you. You can make goo, goo at each other anytime. This is our time.😂😅😅 I love you guys like you're a part of my family ❤

[@chellej4085]

Well, whenever you guys are ready.. Having a baby is a blessing... from god.. to be able to give life.. Like your parents did!!! I have five children and I took care of my children and I didn't ask for nothing because they are my responsibility they are older and grown all over 21 and I'm very proud of all my kids I'm a single parent and all of my children are doing well...making it on there own. not struggling... Children are not for everyone.. live your life your way!! Everyone that has Children are not struggling...believe me!!

[@lisaj.abeliever]

Amen!!🥰👏🏾👏🏾

[@shadivahassan1639]

❤️

[@factsandopinions577]

Yes, they were talking about how people talk about how children bring blessings but apparently are begging to feed their kids. And also Kids are the blessing, they dont bring blessings

[@rityben4162]

I noticed they listed all the disadvantages of having children and not one single advantage.😊

[@ruthnduka531]

The fact is they don’t want children yet, it is their decision to make, nothing you say is going to change that. Children are blessing but they come with their own challenges, so let them be.

[@sandy5993]

Lamb says "I'm looking at you now, what is it doing for me" 🤣🤣🤣🤣❤️❤️ I think if maybe EVERYBODY was as responsible as Ling and Lamb, the world wouldn't be so full of babies who are neglected, or being in homes with no families 🤷

[@b2772]

Correct 👍.

[@racheljackson9762]

What makes you guys a happy couple is what you agree on. I worked with a woman who doesn't and didn't want children and it shocked me when someone would ask her how many children did she have. She would tell them none and they would say I'm sorry your having trouble having children. She would say I don't want any kids. They would start like you are kidding. I would say hey it's her choice it's her and her spouses choice, so in my opinion you have nothing to say because this is between the couple. You guys do YOU....

[@bobodigie3605]

You guys were made for each other! The love is real ❤

[@dianadelgado4123]

If I am invested in procuring time and resources FOR LIFE for that new life, I might make a plug in asking for a baby. Otherwise, it is non of my business. I absolutely love your two-part conversation. It is really refreshing to see how well you communicate your priorities. 👏🏼🌷👏🏼

[@momjs6209]

Am a mother of three handsome boys have been taking care of them all by myself and it happens this way because I happened to listen to what others are saying rather than look at myself to understand what is best for me at the right time. But I don't complain because even though I made a mistake that is now cursing me to raise them all by myself I keep appreciating GOD ALMIGHTY for the gift of life and the strength to keep going on. With my job I and my kids are surviving and am not pushing them to anyone or seeking help from anyone to help take care of them for me. Is really important to weigh choices before embarking on the journey.

[@ernestmwape]

Im sure it would have been much easier with a partner who is just as caring about those kids. I am in a poor country where i have helped about ten kids get their first degrees (three being my own)

[@momjs6209]

@@ernestmwape yes it would have been easier but all the same The Lord is my strength.

[@johannaaguh4438]

Thanks so much for this discussion. I also don't believe that the purpose of having children is for "someone that will take care of you I'm old age" totally selfish. I really want children but I'm also happy where I and my husband are right now, married 9years with no children. We enjoy our company and when the children come they will. Thanks so much for encouraging couples and giving them some food for thought.

[@n.y.a.1000]

Its so refreshing to hear another child free couple's view point on this matter. My husband and I have been together for 10 years. The discussion of children has come up for us. We've been approached by family and friends asking when kids are going to come... They're not! And that's ok! Children aren't for everyone. And that's ok! We've established and built a life that we are proud of together. Just God, him, me and our dog. WE define our relationship.

[@MagmaUpwelling]

Thank you so much for this video... this is reshaping my mindset and helping me deal with all these societal expectations. Thanks, Ling and Lamb

[@dsansburynmo]

OMG!!! I love your LOVE for one another! 😭 I'm crying buckets from this love!!! Thanks for always sharing your wisdom and kindness and love with us! 🙏🥰🤣💝💞

[@angelatillman4323]

I love seeing two people loving each other the way you do! It's plain to see you accept each other the way you are. Beautiful

[@sweetchildafrique5564]

My Opinion is that if you have what it takes to have kids, have them early and get done with that part of life, I had mine early enough so I could start chasing my career of which I am now at the top alongside enjoying the support of my grown kids (so lovely). secondly consider the medical implications of age and viability when you are "NOW" ready to have kids, my aunt had this opinion of yours and when she was ready to have kids they never came until 17 years later (low sperm count, not viable eggs, hormonal imbalance, etc) when she tried IVF., her body suffered it (especially the woman because as you age you get worn out and pregnancy is no joke at all especially when you begin to hit 7months).. good luck to your opinions but I strongly believe with the "RIGHT SUPPORT" system , you can do all things at the same time without excuses or distractions, now my aunt who is almost 56years, is so tired raising her twins and many times I look at her with pity (doing school runs at 56 what the hell...i cant!), please be done with that part as soon as you can because except you have totally decided on not having kids, then be rest assured that it is hurdle you must confront and jump and I would rather do it now I am young, sharp and vibrant than when I am old and have to keep awake the whole night for 3 months straight all because I need to look after a baby... gosh, it is tiring and you will never comprehend it until you start having kids! finally stay positive, it all depends how you raise your kids and your believe system, they won't die, and they will surround you and support you early enough,trust me! what if you eventually along the line you loose your spouse or dont we think that way too, who will be your closet companion, if not your kids (that is if you choose to have and raise them early to be able to have them around then)....I rest my case! my opinions though! Much love Lamb and Ling...

[@inthiskingdomTV]

Can't love you guys less...In good times and bad....We stand with Ling and Lamb...💌💌

[@lesalynntatum443]

You guys are so cute. Enjoy your live together. When the time comes, so will baby!😁

[@nadorriff9197]

Instead of eating like a fool he should save so he can have kids.

[@julietkaunda9600]

@@nadorriff9197 Be nice

[@nadorriff9197]

@@julietkaunda9600 ok dear i Will behave

[@factsandopinions577]

@@julietkaunda9600 you are telling a fool to be nice??? Why should a fool be nice when the fool doesn't have brains to think well??

[@factsandopinions577]

@@nadorriff9197 THEY LIVE IN A HOUSE THAT CAN BUY YOU AND YOUR FAMILY AND YOU THINK HE DOESNT HAVE THE MONEY TO HAVE KIDS????

[@mireillekwesele7928]

You can keep your romance without kids, with kids, after kids as long as you're truly committed in your relationship. Do what works for you. My husband and I are best friend of 29 years now. with 3 grown up Kids we still romantic, kids brought us more joy! I love you❤❤❤ stick together no matter what, value each other and respect each other like you do already!

[@MimisFabulous]

I love you guys, some couples keep having kids and run to poverty and they say they are blessing . These people are sick..

[@RKT310]

Everything nowadays is about money bro. If you have kids when you thought you had money and you run into poverty, that doesn't mean the children are a curse

[@elizabethbartley3569]

My only thought in favor of you two having kids is how beautifully connected your family is. Ling, your Mom and Dad are your best friends. You are likely to produce some great people. I still believe you should name a daughter Ankara should you CHOOSE to have them.😊

[@marisolserrato7598]

We have gone through a similar experience as both of you regarding the pressure. The social pressure to have kids is constant! But we have left the situation in the hands of God and we have left it all in prayer. And we are taking our time.💓

[@AfricanTalesByUzo]

This is so informative for me. I am single and still trying to build myself. Thank you.

[@teresabonyo850]

Children indeed are a blessing from God. Period. It's ok not to want kids, but there's no need to justify yourselves.

[@gmoney715]

honestly, it sucks that it's gotten to the point where you have to address these comments in now two videos. for millions that don't really know you to be so concerned with your reproduction is very bizarre. at the same time, i'm glad you guys are standing firm in this and voicing your beliefs/opinions because society (especially African culture) is sooo convinced that they know what's best for everyone. everything you've said so far is what i wish i could say on a megaphone on the streets of Nigeria lol.

[@CNFringer]

You know , I had all 3 of my babies before I was 28. I did get to fulfill a part of my life that I wanted (I became a nurse), but it was ssooooo hard to do both. I never got to conquer my 2nd career choice when I had to leave nursing to maintain my sanity and love of life (a long story for another time). I left the US Army early...I just couldn't do everything I wanted because I chose to have my kids earlier in life...because I didn't want to be "old" when they graduated college. As much as I love all of my children and grandchildren who I'm still young enough to really enjoy, I would have waited until 30 to at least start having them. Another thing is how things are going NOW in the country and the world. I might even choose not to have any children. I wouldn't want them to grow up in this way. It's awful, imo. That's just me. But for y'all, never let anyone dictate when you have kids. You have them when you are ready in as many ways as possible before you do so. The worst thing is to have them before YOU are ready. God will tell you when it's time.

[@aliuaminat8781]

"The fact that she's dressed, carrying her shoes and bag, doesn't mean she's going. She can cancel" That part got me 🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@superAweber]

"She can cancel". As another introvert I'm happy and grateful you understand her.

[@magahalgorre-ndiaye3267]

To each his own! Guys have your babies when you ready. As for me my kids made me move successful they gave me the drive to do more in my life. I would not trade them for anything. 🤗

[@sabrinaerettes3837]

It really saddens me to know that there are so many miserable people in this world.💔😥 All of the comments you read never entered my mind as I listened to you guys. Your video was informative and enlightening!! Misery loves company I suppose.🤷🏾‍♀️ Whomever can't see that you two are deeply in love with one another simply chooses not to see it. You can't fake that kind of love. Keep putting God first, live your lives and move at your own pace. Love you guys!!❤

[@platinumdiva75]

Perfectly said! Thank you!

[@sabrinaerettes3837]

@@platinumdiva75 Thank you for your kindness.💜

[@taa4277]

Exclusive breastfeeding is actually very healthy for your baby. The immunity from infant diseases also gives the parents peace of mind. My advice, as a grandmother, is do it for at least 3 months or when the baby starts teething

[@trishalachell]

I forgot to comment on part 1, but I completely agree with your points in both videos. I always said I would wait until the 5th year of marriage to have a baby...and we did. People need to let other people decide when they want to have a child...at the end of rhe day(literally) it's going to be you taking of the baby and not them. We're all different and everyone doesn't have that desire to be a parent and that's ok too.

[@markegbe6410]

Just giving my opinion as we were taught at the hospital (paediatrics department) by our professors. It's much more healthier to breastfeed your baby, exclusively for 6months before adoption the formula milk. For me I'd like my child be breastfed for more than 6months maybe to a year and a half 😁. I just wanna have a strong and healthy baby who would be more bonded to his/her mother.

[@danib510]

Anyone saying that these people are not really in love is completely blind. You can see by the way that they always gaze into each others eyes and you can see the happiness that they have with each other every time they look at each other that they are truly and deeply in love. Stop hating on this beautiful love.

[@rebeccabrrown]

You guys radiate so much life and beauty! ❤❤

[@hairlzee]

"Let's take stupidity as far away from this conversation as much as possible!" loveet!!!!!!!!!

[@keishiagatling8563]

Take your time and have fun when y'all are ready to have children y'all will have them.

[@dwdesign2sellbydeidra]

You two are so sweet. Your love is very evident. ❤

[@ruthaneypowell9509]

You guys!!! ❤❤ Love your wisdom and thoughtful counsel. Wish I heard this years ago!

[@viv9719]

Even though I have two kids, I’m learning from them. They are saying the truth, that’s what our parents make us believe so annoying to me 😀❤❤from Nigeria 😅😂😂

[@lionessg.72]

Ling, I heard you and Lamb say in your last part 1 video about your decision whether or not to have children that one of your reasons was because you want to be able to provide the best for your children and not just "get by", if you were to have children at all. In this part 2 video I just want to acknowledge that you are doing an excellent job of keeping your compass pointed North when you said that you know that breastfeeding is best for a child. (It is also best for the mother according to research.) I am not weighing in on your decisions but rather acting as an unsolicited sounding board. If you have a strong conviction that if you were to have a child you believe s/he should be breastfed - DO NOT go against that - whether you have children or not. If you had a child but did not breastfeed even though you truly wanted to, you would be miserable. IMHO, it is best for you not to have kids if for any reason you would need to go against your conviction(s) in order or as a result of doing so. THIS IS NOT ME SAYING THAT YOU SHOULD NOT HAVE KIDS IF YOU ARE UNWILLING TO BREASTFEED! This is me saying that you are doing a great job of sticking to your personal convictions. They are there for a reason. I will say that as a mama of two, I have both breastfed and formula fed. The relationship I have with my breastfed child flows easier, I understand him more deeply, his health is off the charts, and we are more in tune. Breastfeeding not only supports both baby's and mother's physical health best, it supports a healthy, dynamic, and profound relationship best that surpasses the test of weaning years later. You do you best, Ling! Edit: it really sounds like I am only weighing in on "breast is best" in my original comment! Not sure how to convince you otherwise! If you were to formula feed because that was your conviction, I would support you in that, too. The point I am trying to make (& failing?), is that if one of your reasons not to have kids is because you want to give them the best you can in everything and you personally believe that bfing is best but you don't want to "go there" for one reason or another, do not have kids! You won't be happy if you make a compromise one way or another! (Did I do better the second time? Or do I still sound like a biased jerk?! Also, am I patronizing?! Far out. I digress! 😉)

[@weenaburris9242]

Children are a blessing....but it is not mandatory for everyone to have children, married or not!

[@sallamatusesay5757]

Absolutely agree with you Ling. Having so many and you are struggling to look after them is bad.

[@kelechiobiora8901]

Exclusive breastfeeding is for 6 months. It keep the baby healthy. Babies that suck breast longer - one year and more are super intelligent

[@championqueen3751]

You guys are so adorable ❤ thanks for sharing.

[@mindfulness-goodvibes5041]

Success is doing what you want how you want it. Have kids if you want to how you want. Don’t have kids if that’s what you want. Do what makes you happy.

[@AHarewood]

Hands down, this is one of the best shows you two lovebirds have done! Keep doing it your way. No one can live your life for you!❤😊

[@ruthroberson3988]

Thank you so much for part 2 .. I'm a grandmother with one child but four (4) grandchildren and I'm grateful however I fell traditions are made to be broken and stoping whatever your parents use to say or do .. I love you guys theory bc it's your life to live as spiritual and full of love and understanding as you can .. create your new traditions continue the old ones and grow .. very mature and adult like .. Bambi loves Ling and its obvious 🙏🏿🥰😍❤️💯

[@teneishaswinton7591]

Forget what people say...you guys know when you're ready to add to your already beautiful and complete family! Kids are another bill...period!

[@melodieokoye]

You guys are adorable. You make very valid points.

[@digitaltools3011]

I love you both, the honesty. Keep it up guys.

[@ranjinirajendram3435]

Totally agree. You guys are so wise for even though so young. Blessed beautiful couple

[@imah_culate]

I love that they call each other Bambi. So cute

[@RaeshmaByGrace]

That last hug was adorable.

[@b2772]

I was going to mention this from the first video that I was pretty sure that most of those questions were from us we africans 🇸🇱🇸🇱, I was glad you both mention it that most of that question was from Nigerians 🇳🇬. We think from that day you got married, the next thing to think of is babies. Why can't we have time to enjoy our marriage lives. Let's get to know each other more .married lives is totally a new path. That lady or man you knew when you both were boyfriend and girlfriend is not the same as been a marriage couples.

[@jackiebenjamin8772]

So true, Ling. Some try to convince themselves that their children are a blessing. Hell no. I have two children, and none of them have children and they are comfortable in their own skin and so am I.

[@olusolapeolafioye8916]

BEYOND D COMEDY U BRING U GUYS ARE SO DEEP N SMART. Some of d best marital advice EVER❤❤❤❤

[@iamrodiyyah]

Those Nigerians talking it’s their mentality. Let them think whatever they want jare PS Am a full Nigerian and 3 years into marriage and am not mentally, financially and physically ready for a child, having a child is a whole lot of stress and am not ready for stress now I need to make more more money. GOD BLESS YOU BOTH FOREVER ❤

[@tammykordz9996]

Lamb, you are husband material fr, God bless your union❤️

[@titilayo1598]

…And God blessed them. And he said be fruitful, multiply, replenish… That blessing must always come first. It’s important that we all unlearn some nonsense our African parents forced on us, re-learn the great ones and learn amazing things we weren’t taught by our own selves. Married for 3years and nobody is going to force childbearing on me till I’m certain I am in a good place. That’s my decision though. People don’t necessarily have to agree with me or you. Periodt. Love you guys by the way.

[@theophilusakakpo1239]

This is a true definition of what you want and how you want it without any external pressure. Thanks, now I have to take somethings seriously.