Rap Critic: Worst Lyrics of March 2016 (Nicki Minaj/Jay-Z/Beastie Boys)

[@SugarRushMelynx]

Jay Z probably wrote that definition on urbandictionary after the song came out.

[@vp_wrld]

😂😂

[@teababe27]

I wouldn't be surprised.

[@valentinegoromonzi6602]

Looool that's too funny

[@ItsOver9000000]

Especially since his lyric is the only example listed xP

[@somerandomarmydude]

Wouldn't surprise me if he did.

[@AlighieriIsGeek]

I will go get my scooby-doos, those are shoes by the way.

[@iwritetoyourbeats8729]

get me some I'll pay you back

[@jasongenovese8043]

Me too

[@Dreigonix]

Jeez, when did boasting about pedophilia become a trend in rap music?! Do people seriously expect us to think they're cool?

[@robo567]

(coughTygacough)

[@kyletowers9662]

I always knew Chris Hansen was just being a hater. MC PedoBear did nothing wrong

[@DendyJungle]

beastie boys were the lmfao /tenacious d equivalent from the 80s. Purely satirical. They were making fun of douchebags from the 70s

[@ursidae97]

+Dreigonix It's like they go just young enough to get the "awesome" title, but are too squicked out to go any younger. That's really messed up...

[@julianpreskar5855]

no its probably ment as a joke not a boast

[@AlexLong1000]

GOTTA THROW ON DEM SCOOBY DOOS

[@theretrobro3826]

+AlexLong1000 Those are shoes, by the way.

[@Cykelpump33]

+The RetroBro YEEEEE SCOOBY DOOS!^^

[@iceetheskater6052]

💀💀💀😂😂😂Im dead bruh

[@joemomma3648]

I think I figured out that damn Scooby Doo line. Shoes There's a brand of shoes called Vans Make Vans literal The Mystery Machine is an iconic van Scooby Doo rides around in the Mystery Machine Scooby Doos. It's still completely convoluted and has 2 or 3 more steps than a good comparison/reference ought to though.

[@extrahourinthepit]

If Vans are remotely classy I am Jay-Z. Either way I can tell you that’s not it

[@WillyTheComposerOfficial]

Anyone else notice a recurring theme of underage sex in rap critic's worst lyrics lists?

[@TheHeroOfTomorrow]

...do you think it’s bad that he’s denouncing underage sex? Lol

[@kalebbarber2527]

I think the implication was more that statements about sex with underage girls is oddly prominent in rap music

[@lucayaki]

At least it's in the worst lyrics lists.

[@bloodrunsclear]

Large talking dog...clean shoes... Large talking dog...clean shoes... I don't get the connection here.

[@Florithia]

+bloodrunsclear Especially because that large talking dog doesn't even wear shoes himself...and could probably not even SAY 'shoes'.

[@bloodrunsclear]

+Angela Mishler 'Rean Roos Raggy!' Huh...he can't really, can he?

[@TheRantMaster53]

+bloodrunsclear - It rhymes, I guess?

[@bloodrunsclear]

TheRantMaster53 Scooby-Doo...shoes. I guess so? In that case though so does Cordon Bleu, Ground Crew, Lag Screw, Kung Fu and Shampoo. Those are more fun at least!

[@TheRantMaster53]

bloodrunsclear Cockney rhyming slang is weird, I know...

[@FantasyJared]

That father joke at the third one had me ON THE FLOOR! XD Nice video man, you outdid yourself as always. :)

[@shyneshanaman4390]

hahaaahhahahh

[@RadioOppy1]

Ya same here.

[@TheJorgieVerse]

Charlene, Marlene!!!!!

[@applemask]

Is Jay-Z trying to invent hip-hop cockney rhyming slang?

[@james2155]

Applemask hahah yep

[@FaeQueenCory]

I am 90% that Jay-Z was thinking of Jimmy Choos. Since that ends with "oo" and is likely something Beyoncé has mentioned. (They fancy shoes.)

[@AquaLantern]

"THIS MUSIC SO SO SEXY YOU'RE JUST GONNA START FU**ING!" xD

[@slimjimmypage]

I think the Jimmy Page line was pretty clever. Subverts the general conception of the guy and reminds us of how creepy he is.

[@QuikVidGuy]

+slimjimihendrix true, but I'm not sure about saying "I want to be like him"

[@TheSameYellowToy]

+QuikVidGuy I think it might have been a satirical line.

[@Shinbu1128]

+QuikVidGuy You gotta remember, Beastie Boys were basically the Tenacious D of their time. Purely satirical, and purposely completely over the top.

[@QuikVidGuy]

Shinbu1128 "satire" is often used where it doesn't apply

[@Malkmusianful]

+QuikVidGuy they also did rap about an incestuous father, parents throwing away a kid's issue of Modern Sperm (thus inciting rebellion to gain the ability TO PAAAAAAAAAAAARTY), girls doing things that were expected of them in the pre-Friedan era, and Mike D having breath worse than the breath described in Blind Melon's "Wilt." At that point, they are tongue-in-cheek. VERY.

[@jonathankent1517]

Seriously, what is it with rappers and trying to make ephebophilia cool? You've got Kid Rock saying he likes underage girls, you've got Tyga dating an underage girl, and you've got the Beastie Boys with this. Guys, wanting to elicit sex from girls who are under the legal age of consent does not make you a gangster, it makes you that creepy guy in the neighborhood who the local parents tell their kids not to go near.

[@OutofTheLyingsDen]

I can imagine Jay-Z wearing little kid scooby doos right now lol

[@kingnothing915]

A side note about the entire Licensed to Ill album. The Beasties weren't being serious in their message. They were purposely trying to emulate a wild child no-care attitude in order to create a satire of these themes. Ultimately this DID backfire on them most people who bought the album took the lyrics to heart and were the same kind of people who indulged in similar lifestyles. So yes, stupid decision in hindsight; but its purpose was not.

[@aaronpegany]

It would be awesome if you could upload more often. Of course, I understand if you've been busy.

[@Rogueofmv]

To be fair though, Licensed to Ill was kind of a mockery of frat-boy culture at the time, so the original title of the album makes sense in context... not complaining that it was censored though, the final title is awesome and iconic.

[@Malkmusianful]

+Rogueofmv Yeah, as they said in 1994 in the middle of their "enlightened white rappers making punk and sometimes weirdo fun rap" phase. If you look a little closely at "Cooky Puss," "Rock Hard," and "She's On It," they were pretty inundated with the party rap style. They weren't trying to be frats, but more or less trying to be a punk culture variant of Kurtis Blow and several of the block party rappers of the early '80s. They did have a penchant for taking on highly sexual innuendo - as per their early shtick - and amplifying it through their concerts (inflatable penises). In effect, they created the type of scene that made fratboys attracted to their music - thus crossing over hip-hop and starting the commercial watering-down of the genre. The only reason why I'm doubting that Licensed to Ill, as amazing as the whole album is, is a stealth parody of frat-boy commercialized rap is that a lot of Licensed's elements carry into Paul's Boutique. Hypersexual lyrics, tongue-in-cheek misogyny, dynamic sampling (though much more involved via the Dust Brothers), and that bravado that halts with Check Your Head (their best album). But yeah, lyrics on "The New Style" (like the incestuous twins and Mike D's admiration to have the same ephebophilia tendencies of Jimmy Page) are obviously meant to be gags at their hypersexuality.

[@willisgayokgodlike]

upload more frequently pls

[@RapCritic]

+willisgayok Edit these episodes for free and these joints will come out *real* quick homie, lol!

[@RapCritic]

+willisgayok Nah nah, I'm just fuckin' with y'all..

[@willisgayokgodlike]

Wrath's Turntable Time Machine Rocksmash Attack skrrr

[@maskedgamerCX]

+Rap Critic I will lel

[@tacoman1311]

these comment made my day

Hell yeah, new rap critic video. What a good day ^^

[@femchad3317]

Pharrell looks like a wood elf in Skyrim

[@supaXxXfli]

Ive just binged watch your shit....... Love it

[@V4Now]

I'm from britain but I have heard "Scooby-dooes" before I listened to the Jay-z song. It's about brown suede shoes, they used to bring a brush to keep them neat during a night out, it was around the 80s late 70s. Flights used to break out if you stepped on them, according to my dad. London in the Ends

[@BugsMcCoy]

Scooby Doos sounds like really bad Cockney rhyming slang

[@drummr1313]

Fun fact: My dad and my uncle performed with the Beastie Boys!!! ...Before they were famous...

[@BearWindAppleyard]

Jay Z sounds like Rick from Rick and Morty in that song

[@TheNadroj10]

He kinda does.

[@TackyRackyComixNEO]

Morty, y-you gotta put on, you gotta put on your scooby doos *belch*, your scooby doos. That means shoes, Morty, your shoes! Your scooby doos, Morty!

[@neikansanchez2087]

+TackyRackyComixNEO lol

[@glennquagmire7573]

Dude, I love your videos. You seriously deserve more subscribers and views. Keep up the good work man!

[@youtubekeepsmeupu9596]

giggity

[@glennquagmire7573]

+KZbinkeepsmeup KZbinkeepsmeup Oh right!

[@harleymitchelly5542]

+Glenn Quagmire That's Quagmire!

[@HailSatanLLC]

Who else but Quagmire?!

[@michaelboyd395]

Damn, Jay Z. If you keep going around sounding so bourgeoius in your tastes, that Che Guevara t-shirt you always wear at shows is kinda gonna make you look like a hypocrite.

[@belias360]

+Michael Boyd Bit late for that.

[@petercahill6696]

I mean that Guevara picture has been so co-opted by capitalism it's not like it matters that much anymore.

[@tomofthepops]

Scooby doo is mediocre ?! How dare you sir !

[@TheSimsterC]

Yesss new video! glad to see you go in depth more for each song, wasn't sure about the switch from 5 to three songs but it works great here! Keep it up!

[@lukeanimal]

New video! YAAAAAAY!!!

[@james2155]

In Australia we have rhyming slang so that’s why I didn’t think Scooby Doos was such a stretch for shoes. Other examples we have is Tomato Sauce is a Dead Horse, a meat pie is a try, your sky rocket is your pocket etc

[@jamesduncan6729]

Just here to say that "horse" definitely does not rhyme with "sauce," not even in a slant rhyme way

[@Betta66]

Haven't the Beastie Boys disowned, like, a bunch of stuff from License to Ill?

[@AngelineProductions]

This channel is great. You are so funny and spot on!

[@OfficialBurnout]

Rap music never ceases to amaze me.

[@starbatrossmusic7905]

Also, Nicki rhymed system with system

[@PheeblePhilosopher]

Scooby Doo are fine SUEDE SHOES, Bro. Damn..smh.

[@RapCritic]

+Pheeble Philosopher ...says who?

[@RapCritic]

+Rap Critic Wow, I just found them, after having literally no luck trying to google them before. ...that's still a doofy name for a shoe tho. And, it's not like "scooby doo shoes" are exactly common knowledge.

[@PheeblePhilosopher]

Rap Critic Usually they're suede loafers, but ppl have called sneakers & different women's shoes 'Scooby Doos'. Although u are right about it being goofy slang derived from the cartoon character.

[@lunember95]

+Pheeble Philosopher The slang is goofy? Huh, I thought it was Pluto. Eh? Eh? *nudgenudge*

[@Alpha1BDaReaLiSeD]

+Rap Critic everytime you come at jay you get served you have to stop throwing rocks at the throne

[@Eltrio2]

Talking dog solving mysteries with unsupervised teens = fancy shoes. Okay where does the math add up?

[@michaelregehr1882]

man its great to see a rap critic episode come out on my birthday :)

[@Schiels229]

Happy Hanukkah

[@Vanalovan]

+Begg Baws it was Purim ;)

[@stillakilla]

idk how tf i stumbled upon your account but goddamn it im glad i did. pure gold and its exactly what im thinking when a dumbass song comes on.

[@brianbiekman8805]

Thankfully, the Beastie Boys came around and renounced the sexism and homophobia early in their career. Hell, one of them is married to the most notable riot grrrl artist, Kathleen Hanna

[@krisherdown]

The Scooby-Doos just make me think of trying to make Fetch happen.

[@korisnik18]

I stumbled upon one of your videos and it was so entertaining I went on a marathon. Everything was great until the "Scooby Do is mediocre" part. Zoinks indeed! But seriously, great job.

[@hustedr5]

I'VE ALWAYS THOUGHT THAT JIMMY PAGE LINE WAS FUCKED UP! THANK YOU!!

[@Shizomis]

LOVE your channel! watch everyday now!

[@ro0717]

Why are you not more famous? Your videos are so goooood

[@mariokarter13]

I thought the Super Bass line was "coolant system" like something you'd have in a high-performance car next to the fuel injectors (I know nothing about cars). Lumping in AC though... If I ever hit it big rapping, I'll be sure to brag about my power windows.

[@jakobsanchez738]

Thankfully, Adam Horovitz has apologized for Licensed to Ill's original title.

[@trek1030]

About the AC/Convertible thing, you've probably never driven a convertible in 80+ degree weather, lol. It totally makes unbearable heat and sunlight comfortable while still giving you the rush of driving with the roof down, you should try it, it's fun :)

[@MurderCapital666]

Scooby Doo cartoons are not mediocre.

[@annietrinity1833]

Yes they are

[@MurderCapital666]

No they aren't.

[@annietrinity1833]

MurderCapital666 Yes they are. This is fun.

[@MurderCapital666]

I know you are, but what is Scooby-Doo?

[@annietrinity1833]

MurderCapital666 He who smelt it- Oh, nevermind. Have a nice day.

[@foresselbohemio]

I like your videos! SALUDOS DE ARGENTINA!! :D

[@cookielafoo3848]

You know what’s funny I love all three of these songs and have wondered about these lyrics. But they are all proof that a few bad lines won’t always ruin a song.

[@Malkmusianful]

I think Jay-Z might be trying to make a joke with the near-constant reminders of #2 being the sexiest song in the sexy sex world. But with that said, he hammers the joke so hard that it goes straight into the ground. It's like that Edith Mae album Lily Tomlin made - at first it's funny, but the joke goes on and on and on. GET IT?! SHE'S PRECOCIOUS!

[@kenterminateddq5311]

When I saw Beastie Boys on this video, I am thinkin,"Oh no, RapCritic, you attack A Tribe Called Quest (Rest in Peace, Phife Dawg), please don't attack The Beasties too". :(.

[@kenterminateddq5311]

***** Beasties weren't all about lyrics, they were about having fun like A Tribe were.

[@Malkmusianful]

+kenterminatedbygoogle they didn't lose their wallets in El Segundo though so that's why Darren respects them

[@kenterminateddq5311]

Hal Emmerich Yeah, that is a dumb song. But still, I think A Tribe is a fine group. They made fun songs like The Beasties did.

[@Ne5uks]

I love you man, these videos are like the best!!!

[@dennett316]

In the UK, Scooby Doo is rhyming slang for the word "clue". You'd often hear people say "I've not got a Scooby mate" to mean "I haven't got a clue". Using it to mean shoes in a song talking about classier things seems a bit strange, unless he's really bigging up Scooby Doo as a classy show.

[@OptikRvB]

That laugh about the watch almost verged on muppet Waldorf laugh :)

[@brainman67]

Dude I love your videos you are so awesome you opened my eyes on how I listen to rap

[@misterprickly]

He makes the time go fast! That's the sign of good media. Wanna know a sign of bad media? Forcing your audience to sit through a two and a half hour snooze-fest for a five minute fight scene that ends 'cause their mommies are "name twins"... *WTF DC!*

[@Malkmusianful]

+Misterprickly yeah, because Bats realizes Supes can relate to humans and isn't just another General Zod wannabe then again, doesn't really make up for the rest of the film and how they managed to really screw up Lex Luthor aka can you believe this man motherfucking Facebook movie Jesse Eisenberg man Spiderman he built the thing motherfucking Winklevoss twins rowing the goddamn boat.

[@misterprickly]

Hal Emmerich Agreed!

[@ReaperUnreal]

I was wondering where I'd heard that Beastie Boys sample because I'm more of a Techno person than a Rap person and so it surprised me. It turns out that The Prodigy sampled that in their Dirtchamber Sessions and mixed it with Spybreak from Propellerheads (the Matrix lobby scene music). It's super awesome you should all check it out.

[@sanitytheorist8221]

Surprised that the Beastie Boys would have a track like that, lol

[@melo3916]

Maybe Scooby-Doo is another word for Hush Puppies..remember them?😂

[@sega64guy20]

This guy always cracks me up.

[@californianmountainsnake5119]

Man take years to make a video and when he finally does, it's 5 minutes ;_; still a blessed video

[@heymistercarter.]

Okay, what is up with all these artists and wanting underage girls? First Kid Rock on that Osmosis Jones song, then TYGA on that song about Kylie Jenner, now the Beastie Boys with this? I'm sorry, actually no I'm not, but that's deplorable!

[@resonans]

Splendid motion picture, dear sir!

[@bubbletea1985]

I think he meant "Scoobies", which is short for "Scooby doos" which rhymes with "Shoes". Rhyming slang and all that (although even then, rhyming slang isn't really something you'd associate with the upper class anyway).

[@deneV51HDjdw8]

The exact same thing happend to me too, these last days. I started listening more Beastie Boys and when I listened this song I also noticed these lyrics.

[@Jaspertine]

Early Beastie Boys were kinda fucked. Thankfully, they owned up to their behaviour and grew out of it, and they're legends for a reason... but... yeah.

[@TKO_CEY]

schoolboy q ft Kanye west - that part"okokokokokok"-Kanye west

[@meekmillsdad8965]

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@TheStranger513]

Lol has to be the laziest start to a song. He picked it up from there though.

[@kensamo9376]

Yeah the rest of the song makes up for it

[@VantaVoid7]

Wooowww...that ending 😂😂😂. More skits RC!!!

[@SixtyDoesStuff]

I somehow missed that diss at Scooby-Doo previously... =(

[@mrnoname9563]

I literally just realized that the beat of "Oh Really?" is in your outro....

[@harmonicajay91]

Wow... I never thought I would say this but... Thank you, Executive Meddling.

[@bakedspade]

That Beastie Boys lyric deserves the shaming, always wondered what the fuck they were thinking with that one. Also happy to see an upload RC.

[@food223]

i always love these videos, lucky rap gives him so much material

[@thaluck9]

Damn critic, you are tha man!! I want to personally thank you for exposing these rhymes that make no sense, and at the same time showing the world how some week minded fans will fellow along no matter what is said...long as their favorite artists are the ones blah blah blawtdkldechn...PEACE, keep up the great work!

[@dynaboyjl.4220]

I really liked that ending note. I probably like these Lyrics installments more than your regular output because your critique style seems to be pretty linear and focused on individual parts of a song one at a time. And while that's kinda weird with videos focusing around a song, when you could talk about a lot more related to it, it totally fits for these segments making fun of individual stupid lyrics that are often the only thing weighing down a song.

[@guilmon182]

... I didn't know that about Jimmy Page... *sigh*

[@qoaa]

Jerry Lee Lewis married a 13 year old. completely 100% legal.

[@DendyJungle]

ronnie wood did something like that iirc

[@twistedgambit9084]

go look up Malu Trevejo

[@jackbarker1882]

loving the videos!

[@QuikVidGuy]

It's been a while since I tracked down all the former CA producers. I always remembered this show as using lyrics FROM the month in the title. Not that they have a problem with it simply being a monthly show that examines whatever bad lyrics there's material for, I'm just wondering if I was really paying such little attention.

[@Malkmusianful]

+QuikVidGuy he's always done the monthly lists in the style of "these are songs I listened to this month and these are lyrics that don't really work."

[@lastdonuts]

Whoa I never noticed those lyrics before, that's crazy

[@DeconTheed92]

Yeah, I think even die hard Beastie Boy fans look back at the early stages of their career and just collectively agree, in a state of willful denial, that it started with Paul's Boutique. I know I have, as time's gone on. I've heard the "they were deliberately trying to be as offensive as possible for shits and giggles and were not actually that bigoted" excuse plenty of times over the years but man, even if that IS the case, doesn't really change the fat that fuck all of Licensed To Ill is actually funny. Not even the retro drum machine beats and hair metal guitars can save it.

[@KageMaxwell]

RC and I said "What?" at the Scooby Doo part at the same time. Should I be afraid?

[@theanonymousmrgrape5911]

Maybe Scooby Doos are cockney rhyming slang for shoes. In London there is a longstanding tradition of substituting a word for something that rhymes with it, e.g. Trouble and strife meaning wife. Maybe it's a London slang term from this era no one else really knew

[@2022joemac]

it's about time RC! Where ya been?

[@Mint-yh7uo]

Was that Beastie Boys song's beat sampled by that Fat Boys "My Nutz" song?

[@Tortoiseshel]

Maybe he was talking about those slippers with plush Scooby Doo heads on them. It was my first thought.

[@LESTR97]

Well…that kinda ruins Led Zeppelin for me…and learning about how many rockstars from back then did those sorts of things…oof

[@jamesduncan6729]

Please don't fall into that trash line of thinking that just because an artist did/was into shady things that their art is somehow also bad just by association. You can still like something someone made even if they are a bad person Besides, Jimmy Page isn't Led Zeppelin. The band is more than him, he doesn't bring the rest down

[@ebtrax4081]

That jay z part killed me

[@sonikku956]

It would be cool if you explored some New Jack Swing rappers, like Heavy D, LL Cool J, and Kool Moe Dee, as sort of a look to the last.

[@bobbybob3804]

+sonikku956 Ice JJ fish

[@sonikku956]

+bobby bob Oh dear god I remember him. I forgot if he was serious or not.

[@cerealkilla8930]

Urban dictionary also says a pair of brown or light tan dress shoes with stitching along the sides like wing tips.

[@cheezdoodle96]

Hey, Rap Critic. It would be really cool if you ever did a review on Ice Cube's Gangsta Rap Made Me Do It. I love that song! (It's cool if you don't, I'd still love to see a video on it.) Also, I really miss the days when you used that rap critic line from Still Lives Through as your outro theme. What happened to that?

[@krackatar]

Hey RC you should put something more in the background, like a special RC flag or banner or cd collection or something.

[@isabellamorris7902]

Just thought of something: is Scooby Doos a Cockney rhyming slang word for shoes, playing off the idea that British automatically means classy in a lot of media?

[@tinotica]

Cypress Hill used the word Scooby Doo as a gun back in 1993

[@RoseB45]

Apparently 'Scooby doos' never caught on.

[@RaheemRollair]

+Tykira Oh that's too bad.

[@youtubekeepsmeupu9596]

It would have it wasn't for those meddling kids

[@RoseB45]

+KZbinkeepsmeup KZbinkeepsmeup *Scooby laugh*

[@Take2Channel]

At first I thought that Jay-Z may have been referring to Cockney Rhyming Slang, which are slang terms typically used by Cockney Londoners, where they say a phrase that rhymes with the word they're saying instead of the word, e.g. "Apples and Pears" is Rhyming Slang for "Stairs". "Scooby Doo" is indeed Cockney Rhyming Slang... But, for "Clue", not "Shoe".

[@Serraphyst1]

there was this one shoe brand that was big in the fashion world for a while in the 90s that was called "hush puppies", so maybe "hush puppies" -> "scooby doo"?

[@shiranturgeman892]

love youuuu

[@andresmargraf849]

HOL UP was kamizakes album cover a reference to this album cover

[@tavenalexander5469]

Andres Margraf Yes, it is