Ready Player One (the book) is Terrible

[@StygianSkunk]

"...if you can name the planet Luke Skywalker is from..." Ah yes, the obscure, cult classic 'Star Wars'.

[@josharntt]

Iss like toondoran 4 or something

[@Zeriel00]

Wow that's funny because I never liked Star Wars, only seen Empire Strikes Back (SE) ONE TIME as a kid in 1997 and the prequels and I still know that Luke Skywalker is from Tatooine xDD

[@vandelayofficial492]

Did that movie ever even get a sequel?

[@I_was_a_Bullfrog]

But he was born on an asteroid...

[@naranara1690]

Space Lesotho

[@sori_osori_]

In year 2044 people would be still nostalgic about 1980's, because Hollywood would be still making remakes of 2010's remakes of 80's film.

[@lostuser1094]

큐베다이스키 I'm pretty sure baudrillad said something about this...

[@pearce7709]

큐베다이스키 thats some real shit my nigga

[@Anonsage3]

As Amber from Chapo said, THEY'RE FUCKING ROCKABILLIES.

[@mrmustache1125]

You know things are bad in an post apocalypse when people accept reboots as fuel for nostalgia.

[@raphaelmarquez9650]

+ULGROTHA Now be prepared for people nostalgic for the 90's and 2000's.

[@Nukestarmaster]

Hitchhikers Guide was wrong, Vogon poetry is apparently the fourth worst poetry in the universe.

[@oddlyozel]

Nukestarmaster 42 points for griffenpuff

[@TheLowBrassDude]

Luckily it was destroyed when the earth was.

[@Nukestarmaster]

+Lee Anderson Unfortunately it was recreated when the Earth was.

[@Nukestarmaster]

The Dudemeister The Joke =====================================> Your Head

[@boundbythecurve]

This joke was funnier than any nerd reference in the entire book

[@nejdalej]

Hilarious that Ernest is complaining that porn isn't made for 'nerds like him' , considering the sheer volume of hentai out there and that the vast majority of porn is made with only men in mind.

[@The5lacker]

Yeah but that's all CRASS and CRUDE, not like fantasizing about fucking someone while dressed as Luke Skywalker. That's CLASSY.

[@Wink-Webster]

It was that part that really made me realized this was just a Onision book that was published.

[@ardvark3131]

Honestly you don't even have to go to animated or drawn porn. There's plenty of porn spoofs of "nerd" things like Star Wars.

[@Hipno702]

Sir... Star Whores was made in 2001

[@miimiiandco]

Something tells me he's never heard of Rule 34.

[@yochlel2642]

Ready Player One had the potential to be a hilarious satire of modern pop culture's obsession with 60s through 80s nostalgia, but instead both the movie and the book turned out to just be "Big Bang Theory meets Sword Art Online".

[@manospondylus]

negative man Or basically VR-Chat without memes

[@beancheesedip8337]

Disappointed Turtle so, worthless?

[@tetragrade]

I know right, he was talking about thinking of interesting ideas then just awkwardly fumbling past them and I thought of SAO immediately. It even has the same fucked up thematic elements about escapism because the creators are both pathetic manchildren. Really makes you think huh.

[@SOBEKCrocodileGod]

Fuck man, the movie isn't a masterpiece but....ouch man. I dunno, I can't stand BBT and find SAO mediocre, but I enjoyed the movie adaptation quite a bit. Okay the movie, was kinda mediocre admittedly, but much more entertaining than SAO. I'm not touching the book with a ten foot pole, though.

[@brucebanana4486]

negative man ew

[@thatonestormtrooper2760]

"It takes five years for someone to look for an invisible wall in an Easter egg hunt." Meanwhile someone figured out in dark souls 3 you can use a certain spell in a certain place to turn yourself into a certain object that magically gives you access to a certain ladder. Now just imagine if money was on the line to find a way simpler secret

[@mrboerger1620]

Yeah actually oh shucks

[@bigdaddydons6241]

I mean someone found a super Mario 64 Easter egg a couple months back

[@WhiteScorpio2]

@@MeatCatCheesyBlaster Yes.

[@TheSolarWolf]

Jr Beans It would make the “it took 5 years to figure out” feel more plausible more then just “drive backwards mate.”

[@elektra81516]

they figured out Silent Hills P.T in less than 2 days and that requires looking in *very* specific places and saying *very* saying specific things into the Playstation mic

[@RickRaptor105]

"I have seen every Star Trek episode, movie and TV show." Mike Stoklasa, is that you?

[@Godzilla-se8in]

*ENDLESS TRASH ENSUES*

[@M00NMUFFIN]

"Well Mike, which episode of Star Trek did Ready Player One Remind you of?"

[@geofflloyd9751]

Oh my goooooooooooddddddddddd

[@matheusmoreira9951]

That hack fraud is behind all this!!!

[@zanmaru139]

AT-ST!AT-ST!AT-ST!

[@squigg7107]

Must’ve been difficult for Cline to type out that whole poem one-handed

[@canaisyoung3601]

Thanks to speech-to-text programs, he won't need his hands to type it out.

[@TheJediChuck]

I would have liked to see ready player one with a person who hated all the 80s references but still forced to learn it to find the treasure.

[@EB-xc3zd]

TheJediChuck Sounds like a Saturday Night Live skit that would be many times more enjoyable than this book

[@thebossmana]

Everyday Half-Elf Bard SNL hasn't been enjoyable since the 80s

[@thejedisonic67]

TheJediChuck SNL? More like "lets make the 20,000th Trump joke, thats still funny right guys?" the show

[@Mutantcy1992]

That's something that I think this review sort of misses. Wade does actually enjoy the 80's stuff, but most gunters learned all about that stuff because it would be useful, not because it was their favorite thing.

[@thejedisonic67]

TheJediChuck an interesting small trend I found out is that a handful of people have the names "TheJedi_____" with 3 capital letters in it.

[@RobynReanimates]

So is this guy attracted to like every woman in existence? He did say he’s attracted to any girl smarter than him

[@voidofspaceandtime4684]

Only if the girl can recite Luke's home planet.

[@andyenglish4303]

That's easy! Corellia!

[@roundabout468]

That's easy! Chicago!

[@mentorminer2099]

That’s Easy! Coachella!

[@bumplegumple3162]

Mentor Miner That's easy! Clitoris!

[@nono9543]

“I would argue that masturbation is the human animal's most important adaptation. The very cornerstone of our technological civilization. Our hands evolved to grip tools, all right-including our own. You see, thinkers, inventors, and scientists are usually geeks, and geeks have a harder time getting laid than anyone. Without the built-in sexual release valve provided by masturbation, it's doubtful that early humans would have ever mastered the secrets of fire or discovered the wheel. And you can bet that Galileo, Newton, and Einstein never would have made their discoveries if they hadn't first been able to clear their heads by slapping the salami (or "knocking a few protons off the old hydrogen atom"). The same goes for Marie Curie. Before she discovered radium, you can be certain she first discovered the little man in the canoe.” -- Ernest Cline, Author of Ready Player One And people think this guy is a genius.

[@snakeboy2017]

No No Depending on the level of self-awereness this guy had, he sounds at bets like a very dragged on bad joke, and at worse a depressed obnoxious man-child.

[@soundywaivy]

Wait really?

[@electricboxers9043]

Sound Fuck yes, really. Wade even says that he considers masturbating as normal as breathing, and does it as frequently, in the book

[@tigerfestivals5137]

No No lol, that's actually pretty good though

[@alikahubbert52]

No No yeah the dude talks about feeling guilty/shamed about having a cyber sex doll and then he starts talking about haladay’s philosophy about masturbation. I was a bit confused about that judgement.

[@Chromaggia]

The most unrealistic thing about Ready Player One is that despite the fact that the Oasis a super-customizatable character creation system with nonexistent censorship, everyone has these super-detailed, well-designed avatars. We have VRchat. We know damn well that's not what would happen.

[@majorblitz3846]

Like, where is the sentient inanimated objects, humanoid shape made of random household items, muscular man 3d model with anime head from MMD slapped on top of it, a literal PNG, and a fucking crab with blade weapon?

[@corryjamieson3909]

​@@majorblitz3846don't forget the forbidden love child of Michael Myers and a Dust buster.

[@DaleTheBoulder]

Fun fact: you’re wrong. Firstly, the book takes place in a time where there is overpopulation, weak governments, and the threat of nuclear warheads. Many movies and various other stories take place in similar times, and you can’t say that it is unrealistic because you aren’t witnessing it. Secondly, it’s a fictional book. You can get away with it, even if it never happened. It’s not supposed to be what people live like, it’s supposed to be a story about characters who live in that time. The oasis, as different as it is from our vr, is still a realistic place, given the world it is in and the brilliance behind the makers of it. Just because Newton wrote and came up with the laws of gravity, that does not mean that you can too. Like I said, it’s fiction. And finally, Terminator and T2 are fantastic and nearly perfect movies, and there is no flaw in their futurist world. Do you see any evil time traveling robot AI? I thought not. But just because there is evil time traveling AI, does that mean that the entire movie is ruined. No, it doesn’t. All I can say is to not read something that is fictional if you are too close minded to the fact that fiction isn’t real.

[@Chromaggia]

@@DaleTheBoulder All good points, I was just joking about how if the Oasis were made in real life there would be a lot more silly and memey characters running around. I know realism isn’t the point, but I wasn’t being super serious.

[@DaleTheBoulder]

@@Chromaggia we live in a world on nuclear bombs (not really a big threat anymore), VR, the internet and so much more, but we can’t distinguish sarcasm in a text. I see this as an absolute win.

[@molberding5]

I’d love it if the twist was that the main character actually did read the Wikipedia articles instead of watching the media itself. Then at the end, it shows Halliday telling him about how he made the egg because he was so in love with the 80s, and that he’s glad the reward is going to someone with the same appreciation as him, someone who grew up watching and enjoying the same things as he did. Suddenly, the main character realizes that he never actually got to enjoy the 80s: he just memorized everything to get super rich. He’d still take the money of course, but when he left the game, he’d go back to the real world wanting to truly live and enjoy what the game’s creator did. Then again, I’m not Ernest Cline (Thank God) and I’ve never read the book or seen the movie.

[@gabethehoward]

Michael Olberding Dude. Now THAT would have been such a cool plot twist! That would justify the all of the references, and we could even go a step beyond - what if, when his friends makes references, Wade sometimes just doesn’t process it because he didn’t read or watch the 80s show? It would be foreshadowing that maybe he doesn’t know EVERYTHING. Wonderful comment regardless!

[@Nathan-kk6lb]

@@gabethehoward That's honestly a fantastic idea. Especially if you explicitly clarify that the reason Wade won was because he spent hundreds of hours researching Halliday's interests in the most surface level way possible so that he could have a massive breadth of knowledge to work off of since he had no idea what Halliday would throw at him next. But then show that his friends (and the others) actually watched and appreciated 80s culture beyond simply extracting the clues needed to solve the puzzles. With the amount of 80s nostalgiabait these days, that would honestly have been an *incredible* deconstruction of how many current day people don't actually "get" the 80s and instead essentially culturally appropriate it (for lack of a better term) for the sake of trying to make a quick buck. If they managed to squeeze in a comment about how George Lucas made Star Wars because he wanted to give a new generation the same experience he had watching movie serials as a kid, and then showcase how people misinterpret that and simply copy the things that Star Wars did without understanding the mentality that went into it, it would be even better.

[@cameronstone4495]

@@Nathan-kk6lb The fact that this commentary is pretty much written for you already and he does nothing with it is simple criminal to me.

[@pimmelpummel6150]

i thought exactly the same thing and would have been soo much better a story

[@_kalia]

Somehow, fucking _Sword Art Online Abridged_ pulled a better movie reference quipping plot thread than this. The MC and the villain being the only two people cringey enough to make that many quips and nerdy enough to understand them is what tips the MC off about the villain, and then them attributing a quote to two different works highlights the difference in their perspectives. It actually serves a narrative purpose beyond showing how 'smart' and 'cool' the chars are.

[@Nananananaheckyes]

don't talk to me or my 4.0 gpa ever again

[@Juuust_Jaaack]

Sarah proud

[@Sophie-wq6eo]

"It's a good thing I know how to play guitar!!! Anyway here's Wonderwall."

[@crimsondynamo615]

Sophie that’s when you rip the guitar from his hands and beat him to death

[@indy3130]

Sophie ready player one is like the film version of wonderwall.

[@pleasestay24]

Sophie 0-3-5

[@LadyMontane]

Sophie Wahey, this is sooo funny, I got this reference!

[@IfIHadMyTimeAgain]

This one off reference to Rhett and Link is better than all of the book this video is about

[@bobepinelafleur5799]

The stereotype of smart=ugly is the reason men don't take me seriously in my field because I like being very feminine. In engineering, women feel pressure to dress masculine and somber, and some girls do like dressing that way but not all. I never thought wearing wearing high heels in a STEM field would be political but the amount of "Why do you dress like that? You'd be prettier with less makeup" is way too high.

[@silliestgyalsalive]

literally, men do not take women with any semblance of “masculine” interests (such as STEM or things like video games) seriously in general but if you’re a women who has these interests and also happens to enjoy wearing makeup or dressing really feminine it’s suddenly “you’re pretending to be into it for men"

[@JeevesAnthrozaurUS]

"Beam me up, Chewie." -Gandalf

[@ieatgarbage8771]

Jeeves Anthrozaur that was my favorite part of “Harry Potter and the “Star Trek and the “Star Wars and the quotable lines”””

[@eylookvulheimiik7538]

"Set fasers to a fluid that is almost but not quite completely unlike tea"- quentin tarantino

[@329link]

That was from the avengers right?

[@SuperCityscan]

"Use the fasers, Bilbo!" - Dumbledore

[@TheDukeofCheese12]

Dude! Don't post Game of Thrones spoilers on here!

[@Nagoragama]

"This is spoken poetry, so I could be playing the actual author saying all of these things and you'd feel a lot grosser!" "Ohoho, yeah, that sure is the truth! Good thing that's not actually what you're doing though." *It starts playing, killing me instantly*

[@GameHero152]

The worst part, the absolute worst part, that you didn't hear from the clip he played, is that at the end of that "speech," there are people clapping. There are real actual people clapping and cheering at the disgusting scenario he described, and that makes me not only lose hope in humanity, but also fear what it may become in the future

[@Alex-ji6ob]

>If you can remember the name of Luke Skywalker’s home planet, you are hired So literally knowing the most surface level info about Star Wars makes you qualified?

[@TheDukeofCheese12]

If you can't tell me what Han Solo's ship is called, then you aren't a *TRUE* nerd

[@diegomedina9637]

Oh I love Star Wars, my favorite character is Guy with breathing issues.

[@jarmakey1]

I'm one of the rare people who has never seen a single Star Wars movie, and I know the name just by cultural osmosis lol

[@robcohen7678]

Should be like... "What's the name and backstory of the guy who raised the monster in Jabba's pit as his pet"? I can't even remember the name of the monster.

[@lorenzogarcia4335]

TatWHOMween?

[@DoctorNumber10]

I have zero interest in Star Wars and I can tell you that Luke Skywalker was from Tatooine.

[@beancheesedip8337]

Yeah, I love how that's part of the poem like Star Wars is this obscure cult classic from the 70s. Monty Python is a more obscure reference in the US, and everybody I've ever met has at least heard of The Holy Grail.

[@thecollector4332]

Jokes on you, it was a trick question. Luke was born in polis massa.

[@thewingedporpoise]

@@thecollector4332 not the question

[@Iridesca]

He’s not from tatooine, he just grew up there

[@thewingedporpoise]

@@Iridesca those are the same thing

[@pomponi0]

A couple years ago I was writing a story about a really dumb, pop culture cluttered future where fake nostalgia for things you never experienced gave you social status. I had no idea there was already a similar story that took itself seriously.

[@inoaheverything565]

Good luck on your book

[@pr0ntab]

Please I really want to read this now🙏

[@toaster9922]

Id read

[@jackstoutamore8541]

Sean Wilkinson Same!

[@notenoughmemes1847]

This sounds phenomenally better than Ready Player One

[@richardcatlin4390]

Honestly, as a very casual writer, I feel a bit better about the stuff I write.

[@NINgameTENmasterDO]

Honestly, whatever you write is probably a lot better than Cline's shite.

[@Gammera2000]

@one A lot of getting big does have to do with marketing. Skill is great, but relying primarily on word of mouth usually won't get you too far. At best, it'll get you to the point where you'll be able to afford more marketing

[@propoppop9866]

Well this is this guys first book

[@T8-TR]

I don't know who's worst, the chick who did Fifty Shades or Ernest.

[@gravityfel7896]

Omg thought about the same thing, except I really really have to begin writing.......

[@midnightshawarmallama4012]

"Will do to geeks what Jaws did to the ocean" - The Wall Street Journal

[@andyenglish4303]

Kill a bunch of people? Yeah that checks out.

[@Oujouj426]

"Avoid them." not that people weren't already avoiding geeks.

[@vaimantobe3034]

So people become paranoid of geeks? If you think the 'geeks' in the book are remotely normal and become afraid of geeks, i don't blame you

[@SharpieSkunk]

Hey, slow down! We already have RLM references in here, don't wanna get too crazy by adding a YMS reference...

[@lcc2348]

Not sure I want a book swimming through me

[@chenstormstout9456]

That whole description of his avatar’s custom vehicle made me groan/cry with how cringy and stupid it sounded.

[@sodaspeak3437]

And sure enough, Cline made his own. No really, he made a car just like that IRL

[@MachineMan-mj4gj]

@@sodaspeak3437 pop culture was a mistake.

[@vaiyt]

The war games scene is worse than you describe. It plays like this: "You have to re-enact War Games line by line" "Good thing I have all the lines memorized then" Book proceeds to re-tell the entire first fifteen minutes of War Games line by line.

[@admech590]

vaiyt please don't tell me that happens....please don't tell me that the writer literally does that.

[@Lawlaliet]

he does, same goes for Monty Python.

[@100billionsubscriberswithn4]

Did he need to meet some kind of book length quota or something?

[@Lawlaliet]

Not really, because if you read his book "Armada" it kinda shows how much of a shitty writer he is when left to his own devices, seriously the guys writing is on the level of a 7th grader, so he needs to stuff as much references as he can.

[@serpentsoldier7069]

I didn't see this as an issue. I thought this book was great

[@wadespencer3623]

"The kind of woman who drives nerds like me mad with desire" Anime 12 year olds?

[@Mutantcy1992]

OwO

[@garrickschultz1506]

Harsh, but fair.

[@z-teamchainingolem9064]

Hey it's not illegal if they are actually 500 years old lol

[@Gammera2000]

@@z-teamchainingolem9064 My GF said that she would haunt anyone who dared to lewd Kanna. Please be warned.

[@funninoriginal6054]

Hey is that Digibro in the bac-

[@battleupsaber462]

IDK man, I foresee Battletoads having a huge revival in 2044

[@carrie_is_gay]

A humble pawn shop in Nevada will be ground zero

[@IfJesusWoreAHat]

Krateling We only have the remastered Wii version for the Nintendo Wii U, is that okay?

[@barrag3463]

Plebeian+ does it come with a kiss and a hug too?

[@AQWpaladan]

Yes

[@shaaaznable]

Plebeian+ one, two, or three?

[@polilla318]

Ready player one’s “geekyness” came off as tryhard tbh

[@cypher838]

This whole book is just "YoU kIdS lIkE tHeM vIdjA gUmS"

[@catecrutch]

"You aren't a real woman unless you can tell me the name of Luke Skywalker's home planet." - Ernest Cline

[@ineednochannelyoutube5384]

Trick question. Its Polis Massa.

[@funninoriginal6054]

Luke's home planet? That guy from Star Trek? Its Hoth, right?

[@pleasekillyoursef]

im not sure what is worse the fact that he thinks he can say who has the right to be called a real woman ir the fact that thats it, like literally, thats his standard, even hardcore sexists want a woman to to be a mother or a wife, he is even more condescending that The Golden One!!!

[@jessebrook1688]

Cinema Sins ending review line: "We banish you to the point farthest from the bright centre of the universe."

[@baldrickthedungspreader3107]

Isn’t it tattoine ?

[@theresastarmanwaitinginthe5149]

I clapped when I saw the Akira bike! I know what an Akira is! This series BROKE NEW GROUND!

[@adamp3223]

'GRAAAOWNND!!!!'

[@BuddypalVideoCorner]

Did you clap for any of the new and original characters?! Were there any?! NOOOOOOOO

[@bricktastic-acular1298]

I KNOW WHAT THAT ISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!

[@facemelter2277]

I RECOGNISED IT AND I CLAPPED

[@cesarmadero05]

Remember Akira? *THAT'S FROM JAPAN*

[@zeropulses9180]

The worst part of the damn movie is that people used their vr sets OUTSIDE (kicking and walking around), WITHOUT any accidents. In real life, people would get ran over by cars, run into each other, get robbed, etc etc. There is no logical way that would ever be a thing (walking around with a vr set outside of your home).

[@PongoXBongo]

Maybe, in the future, Tesla will add an auto-walk feature to their neural-links.

[@monchete9934]

I'd guess it'd do the same as SAO's Nervegear and map your nerve impulses to the controls, but that'd be giving a shit about it and it wouldn't imply getting out-world-built by Reki fucking Kawahara

[@pimmelpummel6150]

hell pokemon go proves vr isnt even necessary... just have people look at their phones and they will happily walk off cliffs and into traffic

[@sirc7586]

Pretty sure they can move forward with their controllers iirc

[@ThaStikman]

Now imagine if the movie stopped and played the entirety of War Games in the middle of it.

[@krusher181]

This book come wearing its own fedora??? Jesus, this sounds exceptionally vapid.

[@andremoreau8390]

Ernest writes like I wrote once in middle school, read it, and said "I will never write like this again." And it still wasn't this embarrassing.

[@haley7138]

Andre Moreau Sometimes I look at what I'm writing and think "That's not good at all. I should start over." Then I read stuff like RPO and think what I write isn't so bad after all.

[@trenvert123]

You guys are lucky. My writing was just as hackneyed and brain-dead as his. But I'd like to think that after years of growth and introspection and practice, I can write something that at least doesn't offend and bore everyone that reads it at the same time.

[@kropotkinnie]

@@trenvert123 Honestly, most of us writers think this way about our stuff, old and new. If you view your work with a critical eye, chances are it's a lot bettet than you feel it is! I bet your writing is and always has been great. :D

[@laurenofaustralia8874]

I recently found a diary from when I was in high school, flipped through it and promptly burned it. How Ernest didn't feel the need to turn Ready Player One to ashes is baffling.

[@Goose.Films.]

Realistic 2044 teen starter pack: Really into the movies of Michael Bay; "man, he was so misunderstood!" Wears shirts with out of context David Cameron quotes on because he thinks knowing who Dave is makes him interesting and clever "Man what's wrong with music now days. I miss the music of Lil Pump" "I wish horror was still subtle like it was when they made Alien Covenant and paranormal activity ten"

[@RengokuGS]

I am throwing this in a time machine.

[@gbxproducoes857]

That'll be interesting

[@SaintsBro217]

I fear the day Alien Covenant is considered subtle.

[@warbossbonesmasha3751]

Hawl 9000 omg like that Kim jun in guy yeah he was just misunderstood and all

[@jordanloux3883]

Also, like a 60% suicide rate because 2044 is a hellhole with no future.

[@Otokogoroshi]

Important question: When he has to recite Montey Python and the Holy Grail, does he have to make the clop-clop sounds of the coconuts with his mouth? Does he sing the songs or just say them?

[@christianboi7690]

He plays as different characters in different scenes and just has to recite the lines with the right inflection.

[@kappadarwin9476]

@@christianboi7690 ...That old man better be a trillionare

[@detleffleischer9418]

Doing the extra sounds like the clop-clop just gave him extra points, i think

[@johnglue1744]

If Ernest Cline had not listed 1000 references then I think the book would have only been 100 pages long.

[@frankf684]

John Glue It felt like a geek dick measuring contest.

[@pleasekillyoursef]

and in not sure id have better or worse content

[@eterlinblue99]

It's basically "Name Dropping, The Book".

[@Ryukuro]

100 is optimistic

[@Donnerbalken28]

It's more like he read American Psycho, read all the references to the beauty products in that book and thought to himself "I can do this too, but with pop culture references!" without having any clue as to what those excessive descriptions of Patrick Batemans bathroom routines actually meant within the context of the novel.

[@misseli1]

Oh wow, the book really did come with its own fedora. The character doesn't even sound like an actual atheist. They sound like a 14 year-old internet troll who wants to annoy people online, and obsesses more over God than some people of religion. Man, straw-man atheist characters in sub-par Christian films seem more believable.

[@nicholasleclerc1583]

ellie I KNOW RIGHT !!!! I’d also add that he sounds like a desperately attention-seeking “edgy” person

[@ramentaco9179]

ellie He talks like a 15 year old who just became an atheist and wants to flaunt how much smarter he thinks he is than everyone else.

[@calvinlee8103]

I'm an atheist, and even when I was an irritating teenager who just wanted to be right all the time, I was still never **that** bad. The author is either a kinda shitty 12-year-old that's bad at writing, or a VERY shitty adult that's bad at writing.

[@Kanelel]

I mean, I was exactly like that when I was 12. But I was 12 and neither the author nor the character have that excuse.

[@elvellarambles9151]

I know, dude! Remember Jeff from God's Not Dead?

[@Thegr8MC]

My god. That porn poem. I'm SHOCKED that it didn't end with a "m'lady".

[@admech590]

It honestly sounded like a soy boys secret love poem, how they're bearing their soul out to this girl they want to fuck by saying "oh look I'm better than the other misogynistic guys. I find women smarter than me hot. Please, love me, I'll be your happy little cuck for you if you eventually with your consent of course allow me to fuck you." Like he's trying to sound deep but he ends up sounding like a pathetic loser who wants to emotionally munipulate women into fucking him.

[@RingoYote]

Cline is honestly a "Nice Guy"

[@ccggenius]

Hmm... What rhymes with "euphoric"?

[@Thegr8MC]

Trijedi Knight Those types of guys are even worse then the regular douchebag misogynists. At least the douchebags are straightforward about wanting to bang the girl and their "she's a bitch for not wanting to fuck me" hissy fits makes them easy to notice and avoid. The pseudo-deep guys will lure you in with a facade of class and depth only to break your heart when they are revealed to be just as much of a shallow misogynist as every other douchebag.

[@thethingthatwouldnotgoaway5881]

Trijedi Knight So basically modern art and critics?

[@Arrowed_Sparrow]

The movie was so-so. It blew my mind that it took YEARS to find the first easter egg. Which was literally going backwards at the start of a game level. That's the first thing anyone who's ever played a game does.

[@KaiKrimson56]

I also don't get how Sorrento and his goons can go into a nightclub and shoot it up without there be anti-griefing measures since Oasis is supposed to be a VR MMO.

[@Me-pt8tq]

@@KaiKrimson56 in the book it’s a no pvp zone

[@butterknifepatten4455]

thats something i do when i get frustrated with mario kart levels for, like, fun. someone at the very least would have stumbled across it by accident

[@Bellicoder]

​@@Me-pt8tqIt is actually a PvP Zone in the book as well.

[@DaleTheBoulder]

Which is why the book is infinitely better. It is more realistic because almost everything in the book is far more obscure. It does not delve into people learning about the 80s, it delves into people who are fascinated with the 80s. It does not show Halliday as a man who just created the oasis and never delved into him, it showed Halliday as a man obsessed with the 80s, a complete narcissist lunatic that thought that everyone should think like him (it delves even further, and much more horrendously into his character in the second book).

[@LevelZeroToInfinity]

This author definitely belongs on r/niceguys after that bit at the end.

[@captainawesome369]

I mean I see what he was *trying* to say with that poem, that the type of girl he wants to be with (or have sex with) is a girl that he really connects with on emotional level, that it's not just about appearance and being different isn't bad. But the way he goes about it ends up like "Hey girls ! I'm not like those other shallow guys ! Yeah I know I'm amazing, praise me. If you want to go out with me you have to like the exact same things I like, you must not do things that I deemed popular (and therefore bad). I'm super open-minded, all you have to do is to fit into that specific category I like and we're all fine. Again, I'm amazing, I know."

[@ChokoShark]

The Jones Effect then he gets thin and hairless... So... He's hot now, I suppose.

[@sourgreendolly7685]

Captain Awesome Writing a whole poem about the kind of girl they want to be with and how special they are and expecting that to come across as deep is a very nice guy thing to do. Nice guys’ main issue is that they are too focused on what they want out of a woman despite claiming to not be that way.

[@pleasekillyoursef]

you kidding me?! this guy is a full on r/incels!!

[@benki3658]

After watching Family Guy I got sick of references. Constant references feels lazy and a cheap gimmick to pull in audiences with nostalgia and fads. It's feels like it's hiding the bad writing too.

[@vaimantobe3034]

Benki it doesn't help that it's not even integrated in these two media. It's just showing something and letting it do something it's known for. No integration into the plot or themes.

[@jackmcgwire2078]

PokeEmblem 692 "yes yes you just did" ( phineas and ferb reference)

[@CalebCraft10]

Benki References should be sprinkled in like seasoning. My personal favorite use of them is Anohana, but that's likely because of nostalgia

[@LisaSimpsonRules]

The writing is terrible, so dry that many times I felt I was reading a half-assed encyclopedia.

[@jitsauce522]

I feel as though you can have as many references as you want as long as they're subtle, not in your face like "Oh look it's star wars! Get it? Cuz it's Staaaar Waaaars". References should simply come up and disappear as if they never happened, and they shouldn't take away your enjoyment if you don't get the reference.

[@Biggboyy29]

Omg that poem is awful. Starts off referring to women as objects and ends with the whole “you ARE beautiful” thing.

[@matti.8465]

"But m'lady, i am different. I am not one of those bad boys, who will only use you because you are pretty or hot. Those things don't matter to me, because all i want is to shoot the weak spot of your Death Star with my X-wing"

[@pleasekillyoursef]

im not sure what is worse the fact that he thinks he can say who has the right to be called a real woman ir the fact that thats it, like literally, thats his standard, even hardcore sexists want a woman to to be a mother or a wife, he is even more condescending than The Golden One!!!

[@xtylishb4377]

So... this book is sexist? Sounds like my book!

[@Xvladin]

How are women not objects? Self aware, concious objects. Does that not describe what people are?

[@jaywilliams720]

@@Xvladin why are you making this point??? are you just a compulsive contrarian or is this actually going anywhere?

[@dismurrart6648]

Cline's poetry made me become a retroactive virgin and my entire reproductive system dried up like a snail in a salt bath

[@DrShaym]

So Ernest Cline is the quintessential "nice guy".

[@Canadian_Princess]

Seems about right.

[@ThatManinWhite]

Dr Shaym *insert easy red pill joke *

[@theMPrints]

Ernest Cline is the Jar-Jar Binks of yellow literature

[@jennyholiday88]

*quintonssential*

[@KafinSulthan]

@@jennyholiday88 dammit, was just gonna comment this. welp, great minds think alike i guess.

[@FamousFennec]

Will Wheaton blocked me for saying "Big bang theory more like big bad theory"

[@Adustus]

That's basically terrorism

[@zanmaru139]

Will Wheaton blocked me because he's Will Wheaton.

[@nowiecoche]

Will Wheaton blocked me because I follow Internet Historian.

[@NotAFakeName1]

i dont even have an official twitter account, but im probably blocked by will wheaton

[@thebrutusmars]

I post a bit too much political shit on twitter and I still haven’t been blocked by Wil Wheaton I’m a god

[@Warstub]

"It takes five years for someone to look for an invisible wall." Bunch of amateurs. Did no one put together a wiki for this place or what? It took me only five minutes to find all the hidden walls in Dark Souls.

[@Karanthaneos]

I guess that in 2044 Speedrunners have gone extinct

[@testname4464]

Dont forget data mining. This whole Easter Egg hunt would have died out in like a week, either because people found the solution or becuase the game had to be shut down due to rampant hacking.

[@oxygeninhaler4542]

@@testname4464 Don't forget that the reward was overship over the RICHEST COMPANY IN THE WORLD. Tons of companies would do anything for that, and will finish the game in the first few hours.

[@TheTimestreamer]

Clearly nobody played Zelda Second Quest, there, uh?

[@KaiKrimson56]

@@oxygeninhaler4542 Which raises the question: what happened to companies like Microsoft, Sony, Nintendo, etc. when Oasis came out? I know Atari, Intellivision, and Old Nintendo consoles, maybe the Megadrive too would get alot of use for the Easter Egg hunt, but did everyone in the world stop playing consoles that aren't from the 70's to 80's? Do they all make games for Oasis? And if the movie cosmetics are canon, what does Microsoft get out of letting players be the Spartans from Halo? And how far does modding go if Aech can just mod in the Iron Giant without a huge lawsuit? Does his cousin work at Warner Bros.?

[@serrid9330]

I never realized Ready Player One was written by Onision...

[@awkwardorangedrawz5914]

Lol 😂 Also, hello person from ten months ago! 😅

[@thelcpc5163]

@@awkwardorangedrawz5914 Hello person from 6 months ago!

[@bubblysquidd4671]

@@thelcpc5163 hello person from 2 weeks ago!

[@Lucifersfursona]

I was lookin for this comment after Ethan Kline’s poetry

[@alexandriakotsifas]

I was thinking the exact same thing lmao

[@testname4464]

"Mr. Potter, I don't feel so good..." -Luke McFly, Mad Max

[@mangopotato1803]

Ah, Mad Max was my favorite book in the Legend of Zelda series made by TSR!

[@Opentil10]

NO! Mad Max is from the Doctor Who series.

[@Eamonshort1]

I CLAPPED BECAUSE I KNOW WHAT THAT IS!!!!

[@elektra81516]

more like Mad Picard

[@eloii]

I’m bored so here’s a list of references in your comment: - Harry Potter - Avengers: Infinity War - Star Wars - Back to the Future - Mad Max

[@jameshughes7946]

Now I want a Ready Player One audiobook by Quinton sarcastically reading it.... Make it happen Audible

[@thetrashman24]

James Hughes that would be awesome

[@Hopeofmen]

I'd buy it.

[@StarWarsomania]

This might have been interesting if this book had a poorly written character ON PURPOSE (which is why the writing is so terrible, since it is first person) who learns that he immersed himself in all of this for NO REASON because the "Easter egg" wasn't trillions and control of the most important platform and media in the world, but a trolling gif. Then the rest of the book is about how the protagonist realizes that he has no personality, no interests, no real friends, and no life, and has wasted so much time being obsessed with somebody else's life and interests, and has to go on a journey of self-exploration to figure out who he is. And the writing slowly gets less horrible as this goes on. There could even be a subplot to the second half of the book where he tries to expose this fact to the world about the "Easter egg" but nobody believes him or listens. It could be biting social commentary on the fact that you can't save a person who doesn't want to be saved, you can't force people to open their eyes if the fantasy is better and they want to ignore reality. There could be a whole group of people who already found the Easter egg, hundreds of them over the years, and they've created an underground society that he stumbles upon in a Matrix-like way. Man, I wrote the plot to a much better story in ten minutes.

[@MrJason005]

eh, RP1 was never written in a way to make the reader think thoroughly about themselves, it was all a bunch of references so cline can jerk off

[@RexcorJ]

Damn, I'd kill for a story like that. It sounds like an alternate universe version where it trades off blatant references for human introspective, starting with a blank canvas and working from there. I want it.

[@Sebomai-b8i]

I hope you dont mind if i copy paste this summary into google docs and start plotting an outline

[@Klee15]

I would read this book.

[@ReddKnight10]

THATS AMAZING

[@vicentetemes5793]

"It's not like I'm against pornography; I'm a guy, and guys need po-" Suddenly, a different version of the author of this book teleports into scene, shoots at our reality's version of the guy, and screams: *"FACT."*

[@deathknight75]

Pretty sure by "for hours and hours" Mr. Cline meant "for about five minutes, but it feels like hours to her as she realizes what a terrible mistake she made".

[@cractor6307]

babe, can we just watch battle star Galactica and cuddle?

[@FleezyFliits]

In essence, Ready Player One has the potential of being a satirical statement on the state of nostalgia in the modern society, but instead fails to provide any kind of philosophical insight and only serves as a self-insert scifi story that constantly reminds the reader of how the writer has no sense of geek culture, direction for his narrative or what an audience looks for in a story that promises scifi action and referentual humour. That's all we need.

[@DaleTheBoulder]

Hm, I think you missed the part where it is filled the wackiest bullshit that it became a satire of itself while also telling a story of horribly flawed characters left right and center.

[@i.147]

I can't believe RPO was written by a "nice guy". All of this makes so much more sense now

[@ScowlieMeerkat]

"My Linkara is pretty much my MatPat." God I watch too much KZbin. I sure wish a billionaire's ghost woulda warned me about wasting my life.

[@thewingedporpoise]

I mean, I don't think he needs them to be that different

[@JUL-fn6iq]

Haha, this video is an ex-parrot. That was a reference to a famous sketch from the eighth episode of Monthy Python's Flying Circus, in which John Cleese and Michael Palin plays customer and shopkeeper in a petshop. In the sketch, the customer complains to the shopkeeper, that the parrot which he had been sold only half an hour earlier, was in fact dead. The shopkeeper claims that the parrot (Which by the way, was a "Norwegian Blue", which you may have inferred is a fictional species, as there are no parrots indigenous to Norway) is simply resting. This leads to a heated argument, in which the customer attempts to waken the bird by smashing it repeatedly into the counter. The shopkeeper however, refuses to admit that the bird is dead, which enrages the customer, and after a short tirade he exclaims, humorously, "This is an ex-parrot!".

[@aagh8714]

I've got Spielberg on the phone right now, we gon make a movie my man

[@matti.8465]

If you were on the book you would NEED to fully explain the reference, because nerds don't just casually quote things without saying the name of what they are referencing.

[@leontrotsky9268]

Matt I. Yea like who are these Monty Python people I have no idea about any fairly popular pop culture that a good amount of people know about Jesus man I can’t relate at all why aren’t you explaining it better in this book literally marketed as a book about nerdy references

[@T0xXx1k]

That parrot sketch is one of my favorite pieces of media of all time. It's just such an absurd premise acted out as if it's so common we have all been there before. I don't even care for Monty python. I could take it or leave it. But that parrot bit is fantastic. I was trying to explain it to my bf a few weeks back n did not do as good a job as you did explaining what happened.

[@reallyWyrd]

Lol (I wish I could follow with something more creative, but "Lol" is all I've got right now.)

[@DrShaym]

A teenager in 2044 being into Buckaroo Banzai is like if a teenager today was into Flash Gordon (and I'm not talking about the '80s movie, I mean the film serials from the '50s).

[@sailorshark3334]

Look Gary there I am!

[@InternetTAB]

flash--- ahhhhhhhh

[@k-trashradio5163]

soooo did you hate rpo both movie and book? i wont judge you if you did

[@objectionablechione]

Flash Gordon is rad I'm pushing 30 tho so I guess that just validates your observation

[@CloseQuartersTV]

Dr Shaym he was “forced to” in order to win the egg, everybody had to learn about what Halliday liked to win the game, that’s how he knows, not just that he knew about that super old stuff

[@suadela87]

Recently, I was wearing a Star Wars tshirt and just walking down the street. Some random guy saw me, stopped me, and asked, “What was Luke going to Toshi station for?” I don’t know. I don’t care. And I said as much. He gave me a smug look and said, “oh, from your shirt, I thought you liked Star Wars.” Wade, and the author, remind me of that guy. Never mind that I enjoy analyzing the themes and symbolism in Star Wars. Never mind that I like the lightsabers and dogfights and the relationships between the characters, mostly. No, I just need to know that Luke whined about wanting to go pick up fucking power converters and I am validated as liking a thing I like. I didn’t like the movie Ready Player One, but it seems much better than the book. Thanks for steering me clear of it. If I didn’t already have audible, I would use your code to get it.

[@ajzeg01]

Power converters.

[@shimpey2410]

suadela87 “nerd” gatekeeping is actually the worst thing, congrats? U knew a random offhand line. Ur a real fan

[@daedula7457]

@@ajzeg01 yeah. Though kind of defeats the whole point of the statement if someone's just going to say the answer.

[@OnlyRoke]

As Quinton says, we've reached a weird zenith where "knowing" about nerd shit is the real badge. Actually dealing with the nerd shit isn't relevant. People look down on you when you don't know the difference between a Twi'lek and a Togruta for some reason. Nerd culture has very much devolved into this asshole teacher at school who will scoff at any of your analytical thoughts on, say, Shakespeare, because you had to read Romeo & Juliet for class. Obviously YOU don't know shit, while HE has read every word the Bard has ever written and he alone knows the truth of his writings. It's dumbass gatekeeping is what it is.

[@beancheesedip8337]

OnlyRoke I know it isn’t the point of your comment (it’s actually the exact opposite), but I thought Twi’leks and Togrutas were the same thing. Like, I thought Twi’leks came from Togruta.

[@bigfunnyfilms7548]

“Inconceivable!” -Peter Parker, Hitchhikers guide to the galaxy

[@DrZuluGaming]

@Schiggy 2319 Wallace and Gromit games are my favorite BioWare games.

[@tejpatel5320]

@@DrZuluGaming Is this a Pokemon reference?

[@shimshimity5667]

@@DrZuluGaming My name is Wallace, you killed my dog, prepare to die.

[@slashbash1347]

It's to literature what The Big Bang Theory is to TV.

[@tahutoa]

Slashbash you are entirely right.

[@0xlamon]

It was decent for about 2 seasons and complete garbage ever since?

[@TheMiels]

Slashbash funny? Oh wait thats an illigal opinion

[@LieseFury]

BAZOOPER

[@TheGlooSniffer]

Actually, I think The Big Bang Theory might be better than this book. At least in TBBT, the references have some sort of point being there.

[@diegov1743]

So... the film is better than the book? *_gosh that felt so satisfying to say_*

[@JADfims]

pulpshitpost even better example is The Shining. Still a favorite

[@skullcandy14785]

No country for old man is also a good example that the film is better then the book

[@weiyin8046]

Any of the bond movies based on books and also fifty shades of grey. The films are terrible but theyre a smidgon better than the shitpile the books were

[@Odinsday]

No Country for Old Men is a masterpiece.

[@kangdide]

I would say, Coraline is a pretty good example of that too.

[@melissabernatchez5948]

The first thing I noticed when I clicked is that you really lost weight, -Quinton- *Brandon* Reacts! (Like alot) You look great as always.

[@Wilkipedi]

Thicc boi now fitt boi?

[@picklejar7236]

yes boi

[@chocheman3445]

melissa jennifer i think he just shaved and had a haircut

[@oof-rr5nf]

Eddy Wow, you've hurt my fat self's feelings. Then again, I am the biggest couch potato, so I have no arguments to make personally 😂

[@rouka120]

Black is flattering but you can still tell he hasn't lost any weight by his face. The face tells all.

[@nifralo2752]

The ironic thing about Holy Grail is that it's a spoof of Camalot the musical a film that no one under 50 has seen.

[@heathcliffheritage4515]

Unless you are a theatre student in which case you’ve seen the songs Performances in clip form only and nothing else. Lol

[@Chris-ji1gi]

I feel like this book was only successful and praised because it was released at a time when geek and nerd culture exploded into popularity because of things like the Big Bang Theory and the MCU. I cannot think of any other reason how people thought this was good when large chunks are spent quoting things and reading cringe poetry.

[@Lawlaliet]

One word: Hipsters.

[@LoStInThEmUsIc55]

I audibly said “oh no” when you said you had found his poem

[@ao9688]

Every time you read a passage from the book I feel like I'm on the edge of a stroke

[@FictitiousCtrlGames]

I just ate a shawarmas full of greasy garlic and poutine. I am on the edge of a strokèancijfblqh4m3kqbcja

[@ao9688]

Frank Cauldhame fuck me that's what it is.

[@yeethittter1285]

I love how it took someone 5 years to solve the first part of an arg when the solution is literally just to drive backwards, especially with money on the line. Has this guy seen any of the theorists who obsessively look through every cranny of args to find even the smallest details? This would be solved in a day.

[@barrelroll_poopoopeepee]

I had to read this for a class. It felt like a CTRL ALT DELETE comic in book form

[@ajzeg01]

I’m sorry for your I II II L

[@pleasekillyoursef]

the worse part Tim Buckley and this guy really have a similar mindset, but Ernest Clean is like 50 years old, hes a fucking adult!!!!

[@SteelBallRun1890]

@@pleasekillyoursef No way, Tim Buckley is like in his mid 30's, at least. They're both adults, making this more worse off for them.

[@yaboi6851]

you hear about video games?

[@FrogsOfTheNewWorld]

I was cleaning out my nightstand during the part Quinton was reading passages, and for a time I thought he was just doing a bit until I looked up to see that he was actually reading from the book.

[@tifKh]

HolyRays find anything cool?

[@Immorpher]

That kind of attitude towards of what women "should be" is a bit disturbing given recent events.

[@thebossmana]

Immorpher no its called personal preference...

[@alastairbond7104]

Ezekiel Arubuike, there is a difference between having a preference and thinking everyone needs to conform to your preference.

[@gehinkun]

Imagine if Ernest had the imagination to give the chars a sort of bladerunner-cityspeak or like the lingo in A Clockwork Orange made up of nerdy in-jokes and references. That would have been something.

[@DarthInfernite]

The book is much better if you view wade not as a hero but a victim falling deeper and deeper into a hole of self imposed isolation and social outcast status.

[@ethenfl]

Darth Infernite wade really isn’t a hero at all. Just a dude obsessed with games and actually very selfish, he just happened to get in the scenario that happens to make him a “hero”

[@DarthInfernite]

@@ethenfl wade is convinced he's the hero and the book takes place in his pov. He lacks any self awareness in anything he does. One part of the book that stands out to me that alot of people dont talk about is his betrayal of Art3mis privacy upon finding her file. He messages her and basically says "hey you know your private information like your address birthmark etc. I have all that now." He thinks complimenting her birth mark is cute when it's really a huge breach in trust.

[@ethenfl]

Darth Infernite yes this is a big thing, I feel this is a lot more of a human perception of self thing. The book is wade rationalizing all of the fucked up things he did. He went and made it out that he saved the oasis and all of that. But deep down he is just selfish jerk that one this Easter egg because he was obsessed with the creator. Honestly that’s why I love the book. Lots of human psychology.

[@barneythedinosaur4877]

Quinton I want you to know how much this video means to me So I made a side quest where you can bone live action Crocker from the fairly odd parents movies

[@AQWpaladan]

Barney TheDinosaur LMAO

[@Alexander-gb4rr]

Just tell me where this sidequest is, and I gonna give you all of my money.

[@mathieuleader8601]

does Crocker shriek Fairies or MOTHER! at the point of climaxing

[@TheFreepie]

Bitch, you don't know me!

[@Tch356]

In my english 12 class, we were supposed to read ready player one and write an assignment about the book using the criticism focuses. The school rejected the book due to it's vulgarity. I guess i'm lucky i dodged the bullet there. Got to read 1984 instead

[@pyromaniac6084]

Tch356 1984 should be a fuckin priority to read

[@holidayin7962]

1984 is my favorite book.

[@madalenalopez9297]

It's actually imo a good book to be honest.

[@mysteryman4915]

Close call. I enjoyed Animal Farm more.

[@hugoj.r.8684]

Mystery Man Napoleón did nothing wrong

[@eugeniabukhman8533]

I feel like, given the setting of the book, the characters should be nostalgic for this time period we are living in right now. The characters should be geeking out over like, Minecraft and Game of Thrones or something.

[@arthurcosta4643]

This would actually be cool af. The pseudo-nostalgia would be interesting

[@DaleTheBoulder]

Nope, that’s wrong. If you actually read the book, you would know that the Oasis was the biggest there ever was. There was no mention of anything of today, probably meaning that they died. Another reason why is that everyone, or almost everyone, got inthralled in the three keys and gates the moment the video of Halliday’s death aired. They had to look into the 80s, something Halliday was obsessed and stuck in, and use all the information to try and find the keys. And, to make my point very clear, Halliday was basically a god in the world, so it would make no sense for people to forget about him and the billions of dollars he had.

[@nibyafternight1983]

​@@DaleTheBoulder"probably meaning they died" Sooo, everything from the 2010s-onwards just stopped existing? Or they never existed in the first place? Like Minecraft, the biggest game of all time (released before the oasis) which millions of people have a lot of nostalgia for just died and everyone collectively forgot that it even existed, to the point that there's not a single person in the entire virtual universe where people can have avatars of literally anything they wanted, even cares to make a reference to it? Lol what a joke

[@DaleTheBoulder]

@@nibyafternight1983 If you take our life to disagree with the story, you already should not be reading it. It is never confirmed, so speculation that the Oasis was so popular that Halliday's death caused a massive surge in 80s pop culture again is very likely, but it was never confirmed. Also, we can take the Terminator route, meaning that the world is completely different from what it is now and that it doesn't really matter. So, my point is that you have no point as you miss the point of stories.

[@Beecanoe]

Having a bunch of people running around the Oasis with 80s-inspired avatars in the year 2044 is basically the equivalent of people in VR Chat having avatars from the 1950s.

[@Awsomeisimo]

Bennett K if vr chat was usable and dint have that much lag, it would have been useful

[@sidma1980]

Everyone in the Oasis will be anime girls.

[@iamaunicorn1232]

Sounds like the newest lame Fallout 4 mod.

[@jor4114]

Bennett K I'm not gonna lie, if I had the chance to play as classic Woody Woodpecker or Dan Backslide in VR Chat, I sure as hell would.

[@bobbyellis5006]

Oh my god, thank you so much for bringing up that poem written by Cline. It's so freaking cringy and it gives us a deep dive straight into his psyche. He's one of the nice guys, who doesn't care if a woman is beautiful as long as she's smart! It's bull crap. It's a victim complex of "Look, I'm not like those other guys. I don't just want you for your body and reproductive organs, I respect you as a person." No, because if you did, you wouldn't go out of your way to write a poem shaming women who make money via their looks and discrediting the fact that they're probably pretty damn smart for being able to make a career out of it.

[@doritopenguin3048]

The movie: "I Get That Reference: The Movie" The book: "Ernest Cline: The Fantasy Novel"

[@futurestoryteller]

"The Making of Ready Player One: A True Story" "Hey Ernest" a new friend said, "What do you do for a living?" "I'm a writer." Ernest said with pride. "Oh yeah, what are you workin' on right now?" Realizing his bluff has been called Ernest scans his surroundings for an excuse, "Oh.... uh... something..." there sits a model DeLoreon on his desk "inspired by 80's pop culture, very hush hush, but it's going to be great!" "That is great, can I read it when you're done? I love the 80's! Ronald Reagan was the best! He really moved the country in the right direction economically, what with the trickledown and the unregulated Wall St." "Yeah, alright, thanx, just gtfo." And the new friend did. 'Wait just one minute.' Ernest thought to himself now that he was alone, 'now I actually have to come up with a story around 80's pop culture.... Well onto the fun part I guess: disguising procrastination as "research."' Several months later. Ernest Cline now looking like Mr. Stay Puft bloated by Cheezy Puffs, Mountain Dew and Doritos lays sedantary on his futon staring dead-eyed as the credits roll on Ghostbusters. His blood is thick as syrup. He's like Koffing in Snorlax's body with Slowpoke's brain. That is to say: he's nearly dead, and this will have to be the final stop on his indefinite binge. He turns the video app off and he's back to the PS4 home screen with all his platinum trophies (actually there's only one, a TellTale game) he stares into his orange stained fingers, the crusty semen on his boxers, then back to his 4K TV and his "badass" PSN avatar, the collection of blu rays stacked like Peach Trees on and around his entertainment system. His exhausted hand falls beside him and lands on a pair of VR goggles, the ones he bought just to play Arkham 3D. (Who doesn't want to be Batman?) Then it comes to him, all at once, well kind of constipated, like a drunken impotent revelation, as he glares into those goggles like an alien artifact, he says out loud "Whoa! Maybe _this _*_is_*_ the story!"_

[@jacksonlarson6099]

I think the funniest part of this is that the friend calls Ronald Reagan the best.

[@futurestoryteller]

@@jacksonlarson6099 A story with no heroes.

[@canaisyoung3601]

@@jacksonlarson6099 He could be a conservative (or not know just how much Reagan screwed up America. This is why we need more emphasis on history classes).

[@mungdaal9643]

This KZbin comment deserves to be a New York Times Bestseller

[@duncanurquhart5278]

I think you're 100% right that the idea of a whole subculture of people whose lives revolve around being pop-culture experts, not because they like it but because they want to be rich and powerful, sounds like an incredible vessel for biting social commentary. It's always such a shame to see the disconnect between what something sounds like in theory and how disappointing it is in execution.

[@human_no847]

I really liked this insight in the video too. I've always felt alienated by other "geeks" for this very reason, despite the fact I'm on paper very stereotypically geeky.

[@LisaSimpsonRules]

In the real world, it would be a five-minute fad. But in the book it's like god, that universe simulation is everywhere, it's even used for real education.

[@SaintsBro217]

They kinda did it in the show 'Black Mirror'. There's an episode about a guy who is obsessed with a sci-fi series and mods a virtual reality game to match its aesthetic. Within the mod, he makes himself into a godlike captain of a Star Trek type of crew and essentially tortures those who bully or resent him in the real world.

[@Dennnnnnn_]

The Ready Player One book is like a poorly made self-insert fanfiction, written by a borderline niceguy.

[@silver5341]

Borderline? I'm pretty sure he's already there.

[@ineednochannelyoutube5384]

+Alienwey-re Bordeeline personality disorder I presume.

[@CM-ne9ej]

@@ineednochannelyoutube5384 Hey man, no need for that. You don't need a personality disorder to be a fuckass

[@monmonstartv5159]

@@silver5341 Already there? Dude he surpassed the final phase of niceguyism years ago

[@dracocrusher]

I remember back in the day when people were like "Oh my god, this book is so great and it's such a shame that they'll never make a movie about it because of all these licensed characters!" Funny how all those people are just absent now, isn't it?

[@Uhohlisa]

The book is unreadable. I remember there are like three pages in a row where he just lists stuff he's read or watched and it is the most tiresome thing I've ever read in my life, ending with the words "...and of course, Kevin Smith." What!? It's 60s-80s culture, yeah, but also random 90s things thrown in to make sure he's nostalgia-grabbed everyone.

[@Lawlaliet]

I think what made me laugh more is when he brought up Will Weaton as this "spokesman for the freedom of Oasis", so that made me go "Oh! so THAT's why Will agreed to read this book. Because he's in this shitty story."

[@ApacheSenzala]

Sounds like American Psycho for nerds

[@Sityu1991]

Also because Wil is a hack fraud soyboy.

[@Storm-E-Jellybean]

Ready Player One is literally the only book I have never been able to finish due to sheer stupidity. Usually I can convince myself to finish terrible books out of spite, or to give it a proper chance, but I don't even think I made it past chapter five. The author is incapable of telling the difference between himself and his stupid self-insert OC that it sounds like a forty year old man whining about millenials instead of a seventeen year old boy, and the character is absolutely insufferable because of it. He goes on long drawn out inner monologues about how he's lazy, how he's not attractive, how he doesn't work hard, how he's rude, and meanspirited-- but then immediately turns it around and starts whining about how it isn't fair that he doesn't get what /other/ people have, because wahhhh, life's not fairrrr, I'm a good person, wahhhh, I have to replay the same level in this game everyday and people make fun of me, wahhhh. He's constantly treating ALL of his friends like shit, since he thinks he's the most important person in the universe. And literally the first time we meet his "best friend" they have an argument like two nine year old boys about what movies are the best, and then when his friend has a different opinion than him he starts throwing a temper tantrum like the world's about to end and his friend gets annoyed, and he plays the victim. Keep in mind that they author was writing this "witty banter" as if it was supposed to be whimsical or some display of childhood "innocence". Then, to top it all off, every problem is miraculously solved by his dumbass nerd trivia, and it's like the entire point of the book is just to reassure neckbeards and niceguys that it's not /them/ who needs to work on things to improve their lives, it's /society/ who just doesn't appreciate their obvious talents of quoting shitty factoids from things that they never actually watched and sitting on their asses all day. The narrator is so bitter about everything too, and there's this constant running tone that makes it obvious the author not only believes everything he's projecting through the main character, but that he thinks his opinions are superior to everyone else's. He goes on this whole monologue about Christianity like five minutes in, and it's so preachy and mind numbing that I literally wanted to kick his ass despite not being Christian. This book was marketed as a young adult novel, so it's nice to know that good chunk of kids who ended up reading this were immediately told how stupid they are by the author within four paragraphs of picking it up. The narrator also has this really creepy way of describing the girl he has a crush on, where he analyzes literally every aspect of her avatar's body and talks about how she's "not like most girls" because she doesn't have a SEXY avatar, and he doesn't LIKE sexy girls, because they're not "real". But literally all it comes off as is, wahhhhhh, someone hot turned me down once, look what a nice guy I am thinking a "non traditionally" attractive person is prettyyyy. It also makes it pretty obvious what he thinks about women in general, because let's face it, if you're a woman who likes to dress up their avatar? Ahhh, then you should feel bad, because you're estranging slugs and their feelings are more important than yours. I think he thing that annoys me the most about the story is it's also marketed to a lot of people with autism and aspergers because of its representation within the book. I didn't know this going in, but pretty much the minute they did the whole, "Oh yeah, Halladay was a MASSIVE FUCKING DICK, but it's okay because he had aspergers." I got officially pissed off and gave up reading anymore. Literally all of my siblings are on the autism/aspergers spectrum and if this is the shit that people think is "good representation" for them, then I think it's time mommy bloggers start actually reading the books they start toting instead of just adding random crap they find on top ten lists to their own top ten lists. I think the only upside to this is if a book this shitty can become a New York Times bestseller, there's not much stopping me from writing a dumb fucking book and making millions off of it too.

[@jlr_0276]

You know, people today think that every book is great just because is a book, no matter if it's a shitty ass book written for weirdos. Even nerds hated this crap.

[@beancheesedip8337]

Can I just say how much I hate it when people act like having asperger's or autism automatically robs that person of their agency or personal responsibility? Like, the only ways I've ever seen or heard someone use "they have autism" or whatever, it's almost always to either treat them as if they have no agency by infantilizing them or disregarding that autistic person's behaviour or actions by using "they have autism" as this catch-all shield against any form of criticism.

[@ElfHostage]

I love this book. My favorite of all time.

[@sffb8295]

@@beancheesedip8337 I agree heavily. It annoys me so much that people infantilize autistic people and excuse their behaviors just because they're autistic. Like, let that person take accountability like the rest of us holy fuck. Stop being a patronizing and condescending dickwad and realize that autistic people are people in the end of the day and have to be treated as that, not some fucking figurehead for their version of what autism is like!

[@201hastings]

Such a long winded commentary about a book lmao. You definitely sound pretty butt hurt

[@fiercekitty4982]

"I Studied Monty Python" i mean, i love their movies but...........study? really????????

[@TheSameYellowToy]

Fierce Kitty My friend (a film major) actually took a class on Monty Python studies, it's a thing apparently.

[@fiercekitty4982]

We live in a wonderful world

[@jbdbibbaerman8071]

Fierce Kitty I mean, to learn about comedy, I'd imagine it'd teach you something.

[@fuzzydunlop7928]

There's actually a lot of thought and even history that informs the gags in Monty Python movies. For example, the "Anarcho-Syndicalist peasants" scene - I'd always considered it to be a simple anachronistic gag (pun unintended) but after reading more about the time-period it turns out that communes like the one the peasants describe weren't exactly an unheard of phenomenon. In fact, that's how the Italian city-states and some of the Swiss cantons were founded - peasants banding together into communities to keep the landowning gentry and bandits at bay. Not exactly Anarchist as far as our conceptualization of the term in the 20th - 21st century but certainly close for the times, it gives the joke itself multiple layers of understanding. We can understand it as a simple anachronism and laugh at the "help help I'm being repressed!" antics and we can also appreciate it as parodying an actual phenomenon of the time-period by putting it into a contemporary context. They may have been goofs but they were also quite bright, those degenerate Pythons. Likewise, the premise of "Life of Brian" also has some historical context, as during the period of Roman occupation it wasn't exactly uncommon for the Jewish folk to look for messiahs and guard themselves more in their faith, turning to it in times of duress. It sounds ridiculous but there's some substance to the course's existence.

[@hkhjg1734]

the only reason this is popular is because middle school librarians recommend it to every kid.

[@notchuckproductions5029]

This is so true

[@kappadarwin9476]

I guess this is the Twilight of your guys school years.

[@canaisyoung3601]

Plus, all the good books have basically been banned due to whiny PTA moms finding them objectionable without reading them for context.

[@theworkingwriters7214]

Do kids really listen to middle school librarians?

[@TycoonTitian01]

@@theworkingwriters7214 yep

[@piperd9069]

I read the book. I didn't finish it. I finished twilight but I didn't finish ready player one

[@coletrainhetrick]

Piper D and fuck you too

[@thatbuckmulligan]

I stopped at the point the main character had to play video games with a monster.

[@eye2eye899]

It’s written like a fucking fan fiction made by a twelve year old! It’s so bad!

[@JennyTheNerdBat]

Finished it in 3 days. It was an ok-ish read, good enough to relax a bit from more serious stuff. Overhype kinda put a target on it - it seems that author intentionally planned it as campy pulp sci-fi novel, but sudden popularity elevated it to higher expectations (which it certainly doesn't hold up to)

[@crowthewicked8344]

Coletrain Hetrick what the hell is wrong with you?

[@Oscar-----]

I just got to that poem and......... god, I'm never sleeping with men. ever.

[@pjishomo]

Hey were not all like that.

[@tylerwootton8410]

ik ben boe >misspells “we’re”

[@pjishomo]

@@tylerwootton8410 English is not my first language grammar nazi

[@ravenfrancis1476]

@@pjishomo Get out of here with your "not all men" garbage.

[@CasualLog]

@@ravenfrancis1476 i mean.... not all men really arent like that

[@joselocalau123]

That poem made my spirit lift and reach for the heavens so i could find relief from the pain of listening to it

[@matman000000]

Oh God, just the passages you read gave me an aneurysm. This is self-insert fanfiction level of writing. How was this read by a publisher, proof-read by an editor and released to the public? Has Twilight and 50 Shades lowered the bar so much that you can create garbage like this and make millions, just as long as you exploit the right target audience? That's sad, and ironically would probably be a major theme of a good version of Ready Player One.

[@KM-hv1jg]

Mattchester As a writer, it gives me hope. If crap like that can make it, maybe my crap can.

[@MalachiWadas]

Even then I’ve read some fairly funny self-inserts.

[@Oujouj426]

Kristin Moody I'm not even a writer, in fact, I hated writing in school, was horrible at it, got mediocre grades at best, and all this trash is making me consider churning out some of my own paper refuse for the proper group of dumbos.

[@bartholen]

Kristin Moody I used to think the same, but this has actually changed my mind: if previously I felt defeated because I couldn't write well enough, after the soaring success of this utter trash I feel defeated that I can't write *badly* enough to hit the Twlight/50 shades motherlode without becoming a suicidal alcoholic.

[@vocalcalibration8033]

Kristin Moody I relate to this comment more than I want to.

[@HunterMearo]

Ready Player One; the Dark Souls of Harry Potter - My Sarcastic Ass

[@infiniteoctopaw]

Ah yes. A story about a gatekeeping misogynistic nice guy’s self insert Mary Sue fanfiction. Pass This is bad comedy

[@rkrokberg]

I'm watching this instead of writing my theoretical chemistry report, and whatever that equation on your shirt is, is making me really uncomfortable and aware of my horrible procrastination habits.

[@mothcub]

ok I lost it when you laughed after "for hours" PLEASE kill me now tho

[@AQWpaladan]

mothcub HOURS AND HOURS

[@BrickBuster2552]

And then the sun will come up, and it'll be tomorrow, and we'll still be-

[@tahutoa]

BrickBuster2552 oh no, were you shot?

[@adam_nathan]

I almost tore my ears off during the poem, but then I remembered that I’d only be damaging cartilage and I’d still have to hear it.

[@markusnavergard2387]

Vogons would love to get their hands on that poem

[@themysteriouscrumpet]

It's way worse than "Oh freddled gruntbuggly"

[@Nukestarmaster]

Markus Navergard Vogons would be horrified by how horrible the poem is. Their poetry is, after all, only the fourth worst (formerly third) in the universe.

[@leongkinwai9709]

Drill into your ear. Yup.

[@LostApotheosis]

glad to know I can achieve a lucrative porn career regardless of my capabilities or presentation as a pornographic actress simply by knowing the barest of Star Wars trivia.

[@cowfish13]

So listening to Jenny Nicholson's "Ready Player One for Girls", and then hearing you read the actual excerpts is a wild experience. I honestly thought Jenny was paraphrasing.

[@oddlem]

That's... an actual thing? Are you serious? I think I just puked in my mouth. It was hard enough reading through the original book, now I've basically gotten punched in the face twice. oof

[@matti.8465]

@Thej Yhome Its kind of like having Lord of the Flies but with girls, which kind of misses the point. Except that with this book, there is no point because there is no satire or critique, he thinks like this.

[@ccggenius]

Oh god, the ending in the movie was lifted from the book? I'd only been catching pieces of it because one of my co-workers was listening to the audio-books via speaker to prep for the movie. I just assumed it ended like it was the whole time, beardiest grognard wins trillions because he's the most "euphoric" no-lifer, defeats the evil corporation, and gets the girl because nothing makes panties drop like having encyclopedic knowledge of children's television.

[@Ninjahero51264]

They...didn't...build a relationship though? I remember reading the book and enjoying it initially and even I was caught off guard on how quickly the two got together.

[@liteney]

@Drew Taylor This book was so bad there are no words to actually describe how awful it really was, the amount of run on sentences and spelling mistakes alone made it nearly unreadable. And no the entire world was not invested in 1980's culture, the entire world was created by a possibly illiterate, probably still virgin, fat bearded loser, who obviously spent all his time in high school playing video games, watching children's cartoons, and the same shitty movies over and over and over again, because he clearly had no friends and is still mad about it three decades later. So he created a world in which he is not only the richest and most popular person in all of history, but everyone worships his epic awesomeness because he created the greatest video game ever. This fat loser didn't just write a story where he saved the day and got the girl, he wrote a story where he made himself into a god, and anyone who doesn't worship him as such and absolutely love everything that he loves including children's television shows and video games, is dirt poor and will always be dirt poor, because he is god and the popular kids in his high school didn't like what he likes, so they must suffer for it. Because he's a loser still stuck in high school, he can't get over it, and still dreams of punishing those whom dared not to like what he likes 30+ years ago. Also, the reason the relationship between the guy and the girl in the story was so forced, is because the author is a fat bearded virgin who's obviously never had a girlfriend, and wouldn't know what to do with a girl if he ever had one, because he's a fat bearded loser virgin, just like all his fans.

[@liteney]

Those weird skills were my main problem with the book. I don't care how much the kid studied dude's life, there's no way he had EVERY line in War games memorized (not even a single character or scene, but the entire movie). AND could play a perfect game of PacMan. AND beat Joust on one try. AND... I mean, no one who grew up in the 80s, when all that was actually happening, could do all those things. One of them maybe--but not all. And even then, one would be fairly rare. It took what, 30 years, for someone to finally play the first "perfect" game of pacman? It ws so incredibly Mary Sue. It would have been far more interesting to have him fall short and that be how you won. That the creator was like "good, don't waste your life memorizing every line to a movie. That's the lesson here if you want to run things."

[@LisaSimpsonRules]

Actually, I think it's a pretty accurate summary of that trainwreck of a book.

[@ladyj.9350]

Fire Spark bro the author IS a train wreck. Have you read his poetry?

[@DustyMusician]

If... it’s 2044... and there’s an Easter egg... I think that hackers would have already datamined it by now. Also. Good lord. Being smart and being pretty isn’t mutually exclusive. Good lord... that poem...

[@admech590]

Dusty Ernest is probably one of those feminist white knights, you know the type with gaping soy mouth who'd usually go for the equally desperate unshaven blue haired feminist harpies.

[@Lameashellcosplay]

"Harry Potter for adults" Most of the people who like HP are adults lmao.

[@Hawkatana]

That's worrying.

[@willian2848]

Why, tho?​@@Hawkatana

[@Hawkatana]

@@willian2848 How *isn't* it?

[@willian2848]

@Hawkatana if I did know I wouldn't have bother to ask