AUTISM MOM ANSWERS QUESTIONS | Raising an Autistic Kid

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paige layle

paige layle

Күн бұрын

Пікірлер: 2 900
@asi4671
@asi4671 3 жыл бұрын
"I'm not normal enough to be normal, but not autistic enough to be autistic even tho i am" *i felt that in the deepests sides of my soul*
@natashakroll872
@natashakroll872 3 жыл бұрын
That hurt my heart. I can’t imagine feeling so alienated and unsure of where you fit.
@tessward2221
@tessward2221 3 жыл бұрын
SAME!
@MuchLove-3
@MuchLove-3 3 жыл бұрын
That hurts 😭. However, she's amazing the way she is. She doesn't need to fit in any categories.
@natashakroll872
@natashakroll872 3 жыл бұрын
@@MuchLove-3 I agree, I really enjoy her content and that she’s helping spread awareness on things that a lot of people don’t know about autism and other issues in the world. She’s a very incredible human and I look forward to seeing what she accomplishes as I think she’ll do great things
@Lucyyyjaneee
@Lucyyyjaneee 3 жыл бұрын
Same..
@SPECK4ever
@SPECK4ever 3 жыл бұрын
"If I were dumber I'd be happier." Oof. I don't even know how many times I've thought this to myself, especially as a kid. I can't even remember how young I was the first time.
@corinneskitchen
@corinneskitchen 3 жыл бұрын
Sameeee
@rdessone329
@rdessone329 3 жыл бұрын
I'm still thinking the same thing and i'm now 51.
@noraperez5157
@noraperez5157 3 жыл бұрын
Your blessed to be very intelligent
@playdoh658
@playdoh658 3 жыл бұрын
funny, i’m here thinking I was smarter
@totalrevengeance3904
@totalrevengeance3904 3 жыл бұрын
Yuppp. In elementary school I was incredibly smart and I’m still convinced that if I wasn’t as smart as I was I would’ve got a diagnosis at that age. Teachers completely ignore all the symptoms when you’re smart and I was just passed off as the shy quiet smart kid. It only became more obvious I had autism when I started not being able to keep up with middle/high school students
@RyanJones567
@RyanJones567 2 жыл бұрын
11:50 "I feel like no matter what, I never fit in anywhere because I'm not normal enough to be normal and I'm not autistic enough to be autistic enough to be autistic". Dude, that statement hit me like a ton of bricks. I feel like my entire life has been EXACTLY like that. I have never had the ability to articulate it like that. I am a 36 year old man, and that explanation of my existence that I have been missing all of my life. Thank you Paige, you really are a gem!
@seedublancaster9755
@seedublancaster9755 Жыл бұрын
Definitely the same for me. Could not have ever put it better and more simply than this.
@Isabella.Ros33
@Isabella.Ros33 Жыл бұрын
Agreed.
@rask004
@rask004 Жыл бұрын
I totally agree with this. I was late diagnosed at 28 because of this and still at 45 it causes problems. Being in New Zealand where we tend to be 10-15 years behind other countries in the overall supports and that parts of our Health systems have collapsed, it will be like this for life I expect.
@sofiekjrgaard666
@sofiekjrgaard666 3 жыл бұрын
I loved when Paige asked her mother to stop touching her leg or something, and Paige said sorry for asking her not to, but her mother immediently said “that’s okay”. She understands, and does not judge or become angry because she knows Paige and the reason behind it❤️
@carolinem.6747
@carolinem.6747 3 жыл бұрын
it's sad that people like her are a rarity
@neckbackcripplinganxietyattack
@neckbackcripplinganxietyattack 2 жыл бұрын
@@carolinem.6747 yeah, my dad smothers me and gets upset when I ask him to stop as if I hate him, I just don’t like being smothered lol
@BestFriendsWhoLiveTogether
@BestFriendsWhoLiveTogether 2 жыл бұрын
@@neckbackcripplinganxietyattack one time my dad said I wanted him dead, because I can’t regulate my tone of voice so I sound angry and/or annoyed
@jacquelineb9769
@jacquelineb9769 Жыл бұрын
After 42yrs, my dad still touches me when he talks to me, it makes me want to claw my skin off, but he just gets angry when i flinch and rub the feeling away, feels sorry for himself, i hug him cuddle him try to show my love, but he can't accept my needs . I long for this kind of relationship.
@120-l3l
@120-l3l 10 ай бұрын
I wish my mom was like this, she takes EVERYTHING personally and it’s frustrating because I’ve told her so many times it’s a ME thing and not a HER thing 😪
@lildaisyheart
@lildaisyheart 2 жыл бұрын
7:00 when you got upset about no one brought up that you might be autistic, i felt that so hard. im autistic myself, found out a year ago and i struggled so freaking hard in school. it was a horrible time. no one brought it up for me either. no one ever looked into why i was struggling or why i was the way i am. it was absolutely horrible, i have a lot of trauma bc of that. i cant handle any school things cause i just get reminded by that horrible time in my life. no one ever understood me, teachers called me lazy and no one tried to understand why i was struggling. its so sad.
@joycebrewer4150
@joycebrewer4150 2 жыл бұрын
Yeah, I think every report card I ever got, in the comments said "Could try harder." Um, I already was trying as hard as I could. I may not have lived up to my full "book smart" potential, but I was at the peak of my "emotional smarts" potential without any more guidance than I got, and way behind my classmates in that regard.
@jk-jl2lo
@jk-jl2lo 2 жыл бұрын
i felt it too. i've always been told i was smart enough and capable enough to do well in school because i did well on so many tests and assessments and i learned so much so quickly, but i had no executive function skills to finish all my work and organize my life enough to keep my grades up, and any assignments without really clear instructions just overwhelm me and i can't even think of where to start. i've only gotten more burnt out in college to the point where i could not manage more than half the work for any of my classes this entire semester. my fiancé's helping me and if i don't fail, he'll be the only reason why. i'm not even diagnosed with anything other than adhd and depression, i just think i'm probably autistic too. it can make me emotional to just think about all the other classes i still have to take because i know that i'm gonna get overwhelmed and not turn in all of my work and i'm gonna feel terrible. i've been in this cycle since i was a kid but nobody ever thought there might be a problem other than adhd.
@bratgirlcoquettesissygirlypop
@bratgirlcoquettesissygirlypop Жыл бұрын
@@jk-jl2lo this is literally happening to me right now. i was diagnosed with asd at 3 and i’m in my first year of college and i’ve hit a wall. doesn’t help that i learned to assimilate very well so it’s just hard to explain to ppl besides my family (and even then it’s still hard cause i can’t even explain shit to myself sometimes😭). you truly don’t have anything to compare it to cause it’s not like you can swap brains with a non autistic person. if you haven’t yet, try to find someone who is specialized in that stuff if you can. some doctors will diagnose you with anything under the sun before even considering there may be a root cause
@srldwg
@srldwg Жыл бұрын
​@@joycebrewer4150You put that so well. I can completely relate and experienced this also.
@heatherv2758
@heatherv2758 3 жыл бұрын
God this mother is so engaged in the conversation with Paige. Idk why but this made me cry, I wish my mom cared about me this much
@floppybob1121
@floppybob1121 3 жыл бұрын
I completely undetstand!!
@symphonielee7478
@symphonielee7478 3 жыл бұрын
Me too :((
@brazenlilhussy5975
@brazenlilhussy5975 3 жыл бұрын
To all of y'all..I in no way to mean this sound condescending but I'm sure there is love for you..some people just don't know how to show it. I had a distant dad growing up and it does end up affecting you. But if I could say anything in the way of advice (I know none of y'all asked but like I said I'm just trying to give context to avoid condescension..) please don't ever let it define you. (I'm in no way qualified to give advice because everyone's experience is different..) please give yourselves every chance in the world possible.
@floppybob1121
@floppybob1121 3 жыл бұрын
@@brazenlilhussy5975 thank you. My mom was a narcissist. They don't know how to love. But that was my experience. I really appreciate you taking the time to write such a thoughtful comment ❤ I can relate to the original poster because seeing a mom this engaged with their daughter makes people like us compelled to comment. I also typically write how beautiful it is to see such a caring and engaged parent.....something some of us find .....what's the word I'm looking for....foreign.
@brazenlilhussy5975
@brazenlilhussy5975 3 жыл бұрын
@@floppybob1121 That's exactly why I took the time to comment, and usually I can put a good sentence together but it's such a touchy subject, because like we both agree everybody's experience is so personal to them, you don't want it to sound insincere. Thanks so much for your reply and that you took my comment in the way it was intended..you seem to be doing just fine btw..you can read context and intent from a comment so right off the bat they're great traits. I also noticed you said 'was'..I'm sorry to hear that. Take good care of yourself man, and thanks.
@Carriehammer718
@Carriehammer718 3 жыл бұрын
I think she's an amazing mom. I hate when people say because I said so. Kids needs an explanation. Because I said so isn't the correct answer
@catz537
@catz537 3 жыл бұрын
I'm autistic and I have never done well with non-answers to questions. If you're going to tell me to do something, I *need* to know the reason. If you can't give me a good reason, I won't do it - unless there are consequences I don't want to face. And I hate that
@emelliott
@emelliott 3 жыл бұрын
I would behave even when people said becuase I said so becuase I was petrified to be in trouble but I wouldn’t do it again if they gave me an explaination
@forest_goblinn
@forest_goblinn 3 жыл бұрын
Exactly! As a kid I would get so confused and frustrated. Sometimes it would even lead to meltdowns because I just needed to know WHY and understand
@laviniachiara1438
@laviniachiara1438 3 жыл бұрын
Louder for the people in the back!!!!
@sophiagrace6361
@sophiagrace6361 3 жыл бұрын
“Because I said so” is just lazy parenting
@SavageThrifter
@SavageThrifter 3 жыл бұрын
"You're not wrong, you're perfect" "You're drop dead gorgeous" "You're a genius" Love how much your mom gasses you up. When I was a teenager, I finally told my mom that I think I'm depressed and she told me that depression doesn't exist. The times that I did attempt suicide as a teenager, I remember most of my motivation was that I couldn't wait for my family to finally realize what they had done to me and that I wasn't "just being dramatic". Once I became an adult and mother, I found out a lot of terrible trauma that my own mom suffered which led to her being that way so I am more forgiving of her actions now but little did she know I was way more than just depressed, I am autistic haha
@millieguerra08
@millieguerra08 3 жыл бұрын
😩 aww back them people were so ignorant about mental health 💔 thank God times are changing and is being addressed more 💚 i hope u're good now 🥰 i went thru something similar, and they never took their time to investigate if i had something to this day! And just because my son is autistic, i realized i may have attention disorder 🤷‍♀️ and went i asked my mom if she ever realized it, girl she bluntly told me YES BUT I THOUGHT IT WAS JUST THAT U WERE LIKE THAT 😐 i struggled my whole life at school, i even dropped out of college because i just cant learn at the same pace as others. With all my heart i just want my son's journey to be different from mine 💙🧩
@cay_ennem9552
@cay_ennem9552 3 жыл бұрын
My mum does this to my brother aswell and encourages me to I always need help with remembering he needs encouragement 👍🏽
@briannaminton7997
@briannaminton7997 3 жыл бұрын
My mom always called me fat so I starved myself and my mom never told me I was good enough even though I was also extremely smart and let’s just say I ended up in a mental hospital
@cay_ennem9552
@cay_ennem9552 3 жыл бұрын
@@briannaminton7997 I’m so sorry
@poemsky4194
@poemsky4194 3 жыл бұрын
I hope you’re ok, you deserve so so much better I promise you/g
@Penelope222
@Penelope222 2 жыл бұрын
I’m getting teary watching this. My 16 year old daughter has just been diagnosed and I can relate SO MUCH to so much of this. Smart, not so much bullied but excluded, needs to be told why, doesn’t/can’t understand why people should have authority without earning it, teen onset depression… and yet it wasn’t til last year the word autism was even mentioned. Weirdly I always noticed correlations between her and her father, and we have always joked/suspected him of being autistic, but I never made the full connection.
@thereawakening9475
@thereawakening9475 2 жыл бұрын
I am 37, have autism, married, 3 kids and own 3 different businesses
@SeaMarble
@SeaMarble 2 жыл бұрын
I learned I was on the spectrum when I was 14. My 1.5 year old sister (at the time) was severely autistic and practically non-verbal except "tickle-tickle".... when looking into it more we realized how much similarities I had too. I'm currently in my 3rd college attempt at 21 years old..... and to the creator of the video, i would GLADALLY accept you in a "you don't look autistic" club with me.
@mitchell7535
@mitchell7535 3 жыл бұрын
When she said “i hope I’m a safe space” that resonated so deeply i think thats how my mom sees my mental health as well (i dont have autism but do have bpd) and its the best perspective a parent can have Edit: it also makes me unbelievably happy knowing paige has such a good support system within her family its such a rare but beautiful thing for children with disabilities
@shootingstarbit
@shootingstarbit 3 жыл бұрын
Autism obviously manifests in such different ways for every person, but it’s so funny how similar our stories can be
@maliyahhale1223
@maliyahhale1223 3 жыл бұрын
Right, people always think that people who are autistic are weird yet we're literally almost the same, so why judge🤷🏽‍♀️
@Matthewmistcloud
@Matthewmistcloud 3 жыл бұрын
If you have ASD reach out to me on Instagram I’m trying to start out a series of interviewing people with learning disabilities of all kinds so that I can present where we can change stuff in the field of education
@diannaw3034
@diannaw3034 3 жыл бұрын
Agreed! My son is Autistic.. and there was so much that Paige and her mother shared that were so very similar to our story and my son's struggles with Autism.
@ashleebates5708
@ashleebates5708 3 жыл бұрын
Same here girl !!
@ashleebates5708
@ashleebates5708 3 жыл бұрын
I lost my job because of my autism because I might of been a bit slower and my brain works different and they couldn’t accept that :(
@MissyGibson
@MissyGibson 3 жыл бұрын
I think so many “gifted kid” girls get overlooked because they just come across as clever quirky people, and don’t fit the stereotypical ‘boy’ symptoms. It’s frustrates me so much.
@haileys5224
@haileys5224 3 жыл бұрын
I’m that “gifted kid”. I failed out of university and none of my family understood. I couldn’t eat at the dinning commons because of the sensory overload, the large crowded lecture halls made me too nervous to leave my dorm room. I have struggled my entire life, but no one has believed me because I was high achieving. when I was no longer able to preform well in school, my family used my previous ability to achieve to disregard me genuinely asking for help. I went to my old pediatrician and fought for a diagnosis for ADHD, and even that was incredibly difficult for me, in spite of there being lot less stigma for high achieving girls being diagnosed with ADHD. My experience with that has terrified me; my family told me that there was nothing wrong with me and I just wanted to take the lazy way out. I don’t think anyone, including my doctors, will believe me when I bring up my interest in getting a ASD diagnosis.
@JTcutie247
@JTcutie247 3 жыл бұрын
i’ve taken a few classes and nothing that we were taught about autism included anything like her characteristics. so it’s cool to see cases outside of the “textbook”
@9melimelo9
@9melimelo9 3 жыл бұрын
@@haileys5224 I felt that... I went from doing well in high school to struggling in college (where I live you need to do an equivalent to a pre university (2 years) in college before going to University) I ended up dropping out because I couldn't keep up with the fast pace school life and because of my anxiety :/... I personally think I have ADHD, but I'm waiting to get tested and see if it's actually that or something else.
@RazmiWellness
@RazmiWellness 3 жыл бұрын
Hello! Me. :)
@bnicolette14
@bnicolette14 3 жыл бұрын
I'm starting to think I may be autistic. I've actually thought it a few times over the past decade or so. There are so many things that just validate this for me. And I definitely find myself masking certain things about me. I was gifted but failed out of college because I could not comprehend the questions being asked of me. And math came so naturally and easily for me because you don't have to interpret anything. There are obviously many other things but that is just an example I find interesting because I was always top of my class, I was in the 30+ club for ACT, high GPA and was even in the gifted program but college could not click for me and I failed out and it was because I could not make sense of the questions
@sheilareynolds3755
@sheilareynolds3755 3 жыл бұрын
THIS is how people should talk to each other to understand disabilties. Excellent.
@mariyabardarska5895
@mariyabardarska5895 3 жыл бұрын
Yes! But also.. This is how people should talk to each other either way to UNDERSTAND each other, disabilities or not. I have never ever been able to talk so openly and deeply with my parents and not for a lack of trying. The fact that these mother and daughter have autism just adds up to my admiration and slight jealousy, because I've always craved that sort of connection. They're both emotionally intelligent and you can clearly see how they've had struggles all throughout but they wanted to learn. To understand. They ask questions and actually get involved in each other's thought processes, express an interest in each other's emotional experience of events... which is what it's all about I think. Watching this makes me realise how much you get deprived of love and acceptance when people have never been taught the importance of honest communication and emotional intelligence.. I'd say that's probably the biggest disability. Unfortunately no one has put it in a diagnostic manual yet.
@darnella9602
@darnella9602 3 жыл бұрын
Absolutely!!
@SiTrixonian
@SiTrixonian 3 жыл бұрын
@@mariyabardarska5895 I completely agree with your sentiments and I think the simple answer is that is really hard. You have to care for and love the other person enough to invest yourself in the relationship. It takes an big emotional toll on you as a person as well. Our son (9) is awaiting his diognosis for ASD - Autism Spectrum Disorder - (In the UK, other than clinically we don't tend to differentiate where on the spectrum). Being a parent is hard. You have your own experiences, societal expectations and gender/other stereotypes influencing how you behave. I would have to say, that just like Paige's Mom, I grew as a person and a parent in trying to understand what make's my son different. The journey, which I am still on, means I also realise it would be great if we all were this open and understanding with others - it would take away a lot of the misunderstandings and misconceptions we have about each other. I've never had this with my parents either but I hope that my son, and more neurotypical daughter (7), get the benefit of this learning process - to use your words, investing in each others thought processes amd consideration for each others emotional experience of events. This with validation and acceptance will hopefully build better, deeper, safer relationships for both our children. As Paige said, she wants the world to want to understand her so that she doesnt feel so alien in it. My son, I suspect, although he is not yet as a stage where he can express that, needs this too. So, for the moment it is a lot of investment on our and his younger sister's (along with extended family, friends and a supportive local school) part without much in return as we attempt to bridge that gap to him. We make plenty of mistakes but we hope that as we get better and he grows in his own experiences it will be reciprocated, as in this video, to build a healthy, understanding and commuicative relationship pattern for him. We can obviously use these skills elsewhere in life too.
@cbrooks0905
@cbrooks0905 2 жыл бұрын
Being autistic isn’t a disability for everyone.
@KD-ou2np
@KD-ou2np 2 жыл бұрын
Autism is not a disability, it does not mean less capable.
@CalebLeverett
@CalebLeverett 3 жыл бұрын
I got a lot more out of this than I thought I would. Well done, Mom. Great job. I’m the dad and it was only recently suggested to me that IM the one with autism. I’ve not been formally diagnosed, but if I decide to do so and it is confirmed, then it would make so many things in my weird life make so much more sense. Chin up kid. You definitely have a bright future. -the NotoriousDAD 🤗
@GamingSaturnMoonManBoy
@GamingSaturnMoonManBoy 3 жыл бұрын
Caleb Leverett Omg I’ve seen your vids on your channel how’s Parker Doing
@brycemajor7722
@brycemajor7722 3 жыл бұрын
You should go get formally diagnosed. My son was diagnosed with autism and going through the process of his diagnosis rang so many bells with me that I went and was diagnosed as autistic as well and it has really changed the way I view not only my son’s life but has really explained events in my own life. It really felt like a weight was lifted off my shoulders.
@bianca1506
@bianca1506 3 жыл бұрын
my siblings and I have different dads and we all have autism (my brother and I are level 2 and my sister is level 3 - yeah my mum has her hands full) so we believe my mother might be the one with autism but she doesn’t want to get diagnosed.
@b.j.foster2043
@b.j.foster2043 3 жыл бұрын
My sons’ father only found out after our younger (nonverbal) son was diagnosed. Our older son seemed like he had OCD and ADHD so the obviousness was so apparent. Now their father is starting to figure out his childhood (that he’s blocked) and it’s difficult but freeing for him
@b.j.foster2043
@b.j.foster2043 3 жыл бұрын
Wasn’t so apparent*
@audreyw9784
@audreyw9784 3 жыл бұрын
When her mom said "do you need me to do something" it actually brought tears to my eyes. My mom has always been a fixer which made her seem so cold and uncaring. Sometimes I just wanted comfort, not solutions
@courtkendell
@courtkendell Жыл бұрын
i hope i’m not being rude… but i am curious (and you have every right to not answer) but have you received a diagnosis? i related to what you said, i’m currently being evaluated (and have scored extremely high on all of my questionnaires/assessments). regardless, i guess i’m asking what helped you? i struggle with this with my mom wanting to “fix” things for me vs being my mom.
@cocraine
@cocraine Жыл бұрын
@@courtkendell really? I thought it was the opposite
@kiaraeijo
@kiaraeijo 3 жыл бұрын
I can totally relate! In my case, I was initially diagnosed with severe autism, severe mental retardation (now called intellectual disability) and speech delay. My mom was told by the neurologist who diagnosed me that I would never graduate high school, I would never go to college and I would never live a normal life. I was in speech therapy until 8th grade and I was not in mainstream classes until I started high school. My immediate family did everything that they could to help me but some members of my extended family unfortunately didn’t want a relationship with me because I’m on the spectrum. I don’t use the term autistic for myself because in the past, people have used that word to hurt me. It feels good to know that I’m not the only young woman with Autism. Well, I did graduate high school, I have a Bachelors and a Masters degree and I recently got my driver’s license.😍❤️
@levi.sarka01
@levi.sarka01 3 жыл бұрын
Good for you!!! So happy to hear, that things worked out for you.
@savannah4850
@savannah4850 3 жыл бұрын
THATS A HUGE DEAL
@iolemaffei
@iolemaffei 3 жыл бұрын
This made me so happy🥰🥰♥️
@taylinmalolo582
@taylinmalolo582 3 жыл бұрын
Damn now I gotta step it up
@caughtup4672
@caughtup4672 3 жыл бұрын
Thank you
@alphabetquo
@alphabetquo 3 жыл бұрын
Your mom is so pretty. Her eyes make me feel safe
@Shaye13
@Shaye13 3 жыл бұрын
Paige looks so much like her, just gorgeous 😍
@kiarathais2301
@kiarathais2301 3 жыл бұрын
That’s such a beautiful comment
@BbyMxM
@BbyMxM 3 жыл бұрын
??
@alphabetquo
@alphabetquo 3 жыл бұрын
@@BbyMxM if you don’t feel it you just don’t luv
@nationalgeo2191
@nationalgeo2191 3 жыл бұрын
Really? I sense emptiness and selfishness in those eyes
@buggiejuice
@buggiejuice 3 жыл бұрын
y’all really said free therapy. she seems like such a great support.
@cQueuecumber
@cQueuecumber 3 жыл бұрын
Go talk to your mum
@lovelycal4940
@lovelycal4940 3 жыл бұрын
Her mom was so accepting of her she missed it. That's beautiful and scary.
@Mamatruffle
@Mamatruffle 3 жыл бұрын
"Are you okay? You're looking at me weird!" "No.. I.. had Bailey's.. in my coffee cup." I LOST IT LMAO
@ooser707
@ooser707 2 жыл бұрын
@Anna Hofmann help I didn't get it either 😥 hahaha
@benxander18
@benxander18 2 жыл бұрын
Timestamp?
@rachelotremba8100
@rachelotremba8100 2 жыл бұрын
@@benxander18around 25:08
@ari-roars
@ari-roars 2 жыл бұрын
@@ooser707 She had been drinking Baileys, an alcoholic drink so I guess she was a little drunk haha!😄
@arealdevilsadvocate
@arealdevilsadvocate Жыл бұрын
I'm amused not only that she openly admitted to it, but that almost no one else seems to have noticed 😂
@baah5443s
@baah5443s 3 жыл бұрын
My mom doesn't think I am actually autistic so this was so so refreshing to hear and see a mom so loving and supportive.
@CollegeChick818
@CollegeChick818 3 жыл бұрын
My mom is the same way. Same with my adhd diagnosis. She thinks I use them as excuses. But she does say I think in only in Black and White. (I tell her I can see the middle ground- she doesn't believe me)
@Delihlah
@Delihlah 3 жыл бұрын
Mine's the opposite 😅 she insists that I am and wants me to go see a psychiatrist
@isabellemeissner9873
@isabellemeissner9873 3 жыл бұрын
@@Delihlah SAME, but with ADD
@Delihlah
@Delihlah 3 жыл бұрын
@@isabellemeissner9873 ADD doesn't exist as a term anymore. They combined it with ADHD so now you either have ADHD Inattentive or ADHD Hyperactive. I have ADHD Inattentive but my mom thinks I also have autism or was misdiagnosed.
@melissajones6
@melissajones6 3 жыл бұрын
@@Delihlah where did you get that information about there being no add just adhd with inattentive or hyper attentive? Because add is just attention deficit meaning they are “inattentive” and in adhd the “hd” stands for “hyperactivity disorder” so in essence what you’re still saying is, there’s only add (inattentive) and adhd (hyper)
@georgerobins4110
@georgerobins4110 3 жыл бұрын
Can I just say, as an ADHDer, I really appreciate your wall design. Idk I just like to have something to focus on when my mind starts to wander
@katherinefry5797
@katherinefry5797 3 жыл бұрын
Omg same
@sandruhhh___3828
@sandruhhh___3828 3 жыл бұрын
I didn’t realize how much I look at the wall when I watch her videos...but WOW same!
@thatzsoraya3616
@thatzsoraya3616 3 жыл бұрын
sameee😭😭
@breezemansker3366
@breezemansker3366 3 жыл бұрын
Same I'm always looking at her walls and their reflection 🖤
@katew1030
@katew1030 3 жыл бұрын
this makes so much sense now. i stared at it the whole video
@Weanus2
@Weanus2 3 жыл бұрын
Your mother has a very beautiful soul. She really is a wonderful mom.
@veeoo973
@veeoo973 3 жыл бұрын
Females tend to “mask” their autism/adhd. That’s why it’s hard for females to be diagnosed. That’s why her mom couldn’t see it. That’s why any of us can’t always see it
@cfmh8188
@cfmh8188 3 жыл бұрын
Yes, I have been diagnosed with ADHD and I’m looking into pursuing an Autism diagnosis. Most of what I deal with is internal. It has external consequences but they look like laziness from the outside. I wasn’t able to go to a doctor for all of it until I opened up. Because we mask, it puts so much pressure on us to notice the situation. I wish my parents knew sooner. But, I can’t blame them. It’s hard to tell because it’s all going on the inside.
@randomguy56789
@randomguy56789 3 жыл бұрын
It’s not just females
@playdoh658
@playdoh658 3 жыл бұрын
@@randomguy56789 they didn’t say that. Its just that women tend to mask more
@harmony8623
@harmony8623 3 жыл бұрын
@@playdoh658 not really, no traits are specific to gender. Autism has two main presentations: external and internal, not male and female presentations. So many men mask as well, or trans men, or non binary that were AFAB People NEED to stop saying female and male in regards to autism traits, it’s so harmful.
@playdoh658
@playdoh658 3 жыл бұрын
@@harmony8623 but it’s true? afabs were taught to act a certain way. which affected the way we behaved or atleast we believed the right way to behave is. It’s literally statistical...(also I never said men don’t experience it so i’m not sure why you brought it up) yes a lot of amabs mask aswell BUT there’s a much higher percentage of afabs who do. White male presenting ppl get diagnosed much quicker bcs the diagnostic tool is literally based on them. So anyone who doesn’t fit that criteria will have a harder time realizing they’re autistic (or parents won’t think they’re autistic but they’re misbehaving, trying to fix them to he more “ladylike”) so young afabs believe that they’re weird and so they hide who they are by masking. Not only do their parents tell them to do this not that (which gives them material on how to mask) so they can act like a “normal girl”, but classmates as well (especially if the child experiences bullying) I’ve experienced this personally and I know many many many others who did aswell. Don’t forget the “autism only happens to boys” (amabs) thing is still a thing. When amabs show signs of autism, its obvious to allistics. But if afabs do (collecting toys, talking a lot and so on. This also applies to adhd) it’s seen as normal
@sarahkate297
@sarahkate297 3 жыл бұрын
I just showed this to my mom and it finally clicked for her! everything your mom was saying, my mom identified with so strongly! Thank you, Paige and Paige's mom! Thank you so much!!
@cocraine
@cocraine 3 жыл бұрын
Do you suggest I send it to my mom?
@buggysims723
@buggysims723 2 жыл бұрын
I’m sending this to my mom too… hoping to get some validation. I can’t tell if I’m just like Paige, or if it’s all in my head.
@buggysims723
@buggysims723 2 жыл бұрын
@@cocraine yes!
@xSunshinex4206
@xSunshinex4206 2 жыл бұрын
@srldwg
@srldwg Жыл бұрын
​@@buggysims723You can be different than her, but experience the feelings that she's had (and has). Your feelings are valid and if you feel the way you do, it is not all in your head.
@cawesomewhatever
@cawesomewhatever 3 жыл бұрын
“You don’t look autistic” it’s kind of like saying you don’t look depressed or deaf or blind. I get it because of the stereotypes around those things. It’s still kind of invalidating.
@sothatsmylife149
@sothatsmylife149 3 жыл бұрын
Plus that's insulting. Like saying all autistic people look a certain way is very rude. Also, even if that person is/isn't autistic, it's hurtful either way.
@ceeceedior21
@ceeceedior21 3 жыл бұрын
Well some autistic kids DO have a look to them. Remember there’s a whole spectrum
@leem.5246
@leem.5246 3 жыл бұрын
@@ceeceedior21 There’s a whole spectrum that means we don’t all look like each other... some of us having similar features doesn’t equate to “looking autistic”
@haleyrussom4997
@haleyrussom4997 3 жыл бұрын
Or gay. Not saying it’s the same but so many people say you don’t look blank it’s just like thanks I don’t think there is a law on how I’m supposed to look on the outside if I’m this on the inside.
@sothatsmylife149
@sothatsmylife149 3 жыл бұрын
@@haleyrussom4997 Yeah I'm told by some "You just looked lesbian/bi" (I'm lesbian) and others are like "Nah you look 'straight'" like wtf ppl look different anyone looks any way??
@kenzielwahn
@kenzielwahn 3 жыл бұрын
Seeing you interact with another person is weirdly comforting for me. The way you look around, your blinking, things like that... I feel validated, because I do that. And it’s cool to see someone I look up to have some of the same mannerisms as me
@tapiwakay
@tapiwakay 3 жыл бұрын
I stare off so I can concentrate on the speaking person's word. People always look in the direction I'm staring to see what I'm looking at. Lol.
@sothatsmylife149
@sothatsmylife149 3 жыл бұрын
I do that too and I'm not even autistic
@tamales318
@tamales318 3 жыл бұрын
I do this too! I felt valid as well :) i just recently like a week ago got diagnosed and it makes so much sense now for everyone how i was always different in some ways
@cloudpiano6097
@cloudpiano6097 3 жыл бұрын
Me too I'm always looking around im never not really
@quintyv2969
@quintyv2969 3 жыл бұрын
@@tapiwakay don’t know if it’s my adhd or just me but I do this too!! When I talk and listen I need to look away to concentrate or remember
@alyr5348
@alyr5348 3 жыл бұрын
"I hope I can be your safe place" I wish and hope every parent is like her.
@cowabunga8922
@cowabunga8922 3 жыл бұрын
This made me breakdown. I'm not diagnosed (yet), but thinking about my childhood and how it was so similar to yours and how I now know what was so "wrong" with me. Thank you for this video because it gave me a lot of information and things I can ask my mom for when I go get a diagnosis.
@missmissy5170
@missmissy5170 6 ай бұрын
I love how easily you both speak to each other. I can't talk to my mom about my struggles. She denies that anything is wrong with me.
@wowwee0
@wowwee0 3 ай бұрын
Same ❤ this video helps me see how mother-daughter relationships could be.
@amandaeddy7443
@amandaeddy7443 3 жыл бұрын
I love to see you telling your mom things your parents did growing up that hurt you and her just listening and validating you not saying things like “I did the best I could”
@monsieurfrancoise
@monsieurfrancoise 3 жыл бұрын
Yesss this is so important. My parents could never.
@SugarWater14
@SugarWater14 3 жыл бұрын
I wish my parents could do that. I completely opened up to my mom about how she’s made me feel the past 3 years. She didn’t say anything and ignored it two weeks later when she sent me a text. Then she continued to treat me the same way 🙃
@tywinters1042
@tywinters1042 3 жыл бұрын
Its really beautiful. My parents could never. I’m so tired of talking to a parent and hearing well I just did the best I could... they get so defensive! I will always hear my children and validate their feelings. As parents we make mistakes and you should know how to say sorry and grow.
@selenathetabby
@selenathetabby 3 жыл бұрын
My mom literally says something similar to me-
@mariyabardarska5895
@mariyabardarska5895 3 жыл бұрын
Tell me about it. I think I may have felt the acceptance and love and warmth that come with that.. somewhere in a dream. My mom can't even comprehend the concept of sharing complex emotions, or the fact tha it is not about "blaming" her, it's just trying to make a connection. Whenever I try to speak openly about how I've felt about things she did while I was growing up, she either pulls out the victim card, sarcastically patronising me by saying things like "oh yeah yeah I know, it's all my fault, I was awful" or just plain and simple blames me for being too "closed off"... If anyone knows a way around that, please let me know 😁
@darnella9602
@darnella9602 3 жыл бұрын
Autism is a gift, we see the world differently and thats why people don’t understand us most times because of the way we hear and see things. This was given to us by god for a reason in my eyes, we’re special🙂❤️
@khandowando2399
@khandowando2399 3 жыл бұрын
SN: you're really gorgeous 😍😍
@darnella9602
@darnella9602 3 жыл бұрын
@@khandowando2399 aw thank youu
@TheePrettyTomboy
@TheePrettyTomboy 3 жыл бұрын
Yes you’re so beautiful and you’re also very right I love both my autistic sons they have changed my perspective on life for the better✅😍
@darnella9602
@darnella9602 3 жыл бұрын
@@TheePrettyTomboy aw thank you and that’s so awesome❤️
@dollman20
@dollman20 3 жыл бұрын
I totally agree! I think we have a lot to bring to the world and it’s a gift. It doesn’t always feel like a gift, but it is.
@brittneyjohnston1618
@brittneyjohnston1618 3 жыл бұрын
As the mother of a newly diagnosed beautiful daughter that nobody “thinks” is autistic, the part where you said “I’m not normal enough to be normal and I’m not autistic enough to be autistic, even though I am” struck me so hard. My daughter struggles to explain her feelings and emotions still but I KNOW this is what she’s feeling. 😭🥺
@kemismits6158
@kemismits6158 3 жыл бұрын
I don’t know hold old your daughter is, but I am the same. I am now 21 years old and I think I got diagnosed around my ninth. A tip I can give you is get as much therapies and professional help as much as she can handle, not to chance her, but to give her the right tools to thrive in society. Because she will have to and people will expect the same from her then from others. This way at home she can be herself, but at the outside she will end up using this tool without even knowing. I’m extremely grateful that my parents did this for me, because I’ve seen children with parents who cleared the path for their autistic child. Like they didn’t have to do stuff they didn’t like or they didn’t have to get a job, but now these young adults are struggling in society. Also believe in her and don’t think she can’t do things because of her autism. I sometimes have high sensitivity issues yet I still work at a theme park and getting my Bachelors in Leisure and Events and I love it! It won’t be issue and she will have identity issues because of this, but what I liked the most when I was younger to be arounds kids that were the same as me. I made great friends and I never felt alone. Push her to the be the best version of herself and be proud of her, because I know she will thrive in this society and will live a happy life. Autism isn’t the end of the world even though for her it might feel like that on some days. Emotions are always difficult but no matter how old she is what worked for me was to keep it simple. Around 12 I started to learn emotions through emojis for ex. I’m sorry for this super long answer you didn’t ask for but conclusion: I am now grateful that I am not autistic enough to be autistic and I know your daughter will be too someday. She will grow up to be an amazing woman with her own little weird perks that make her not normal, but very special in a good and sometimes bad ways like us all!
@richiemcconnochie2506
@richiemcconnochie2506 3 жыл бұрын
Try. kzbin.info/www/bejne/oKWxnKKNr713Z5Y
@OmniscientlyMe
@OmniscientlyMe 3 жыл бұрын
Yeah, being that high functioning is like being stuck in the "uncanny valley" of social interaction.
@helenawheaton5577
@helenawheaton5577 3 жыл бұрын
This is me, just started college and an autistic girl that was diagnosed later in life. You story resonates with me so hard
@carriefantotheend
@carriefantotheend 3 жыл бұрын
‘I care about being right so if I’m hurting you that’s wrong. So if I’m hurting someone I want to know and I think what really killed me as a kid was people not telling me when I hurt them so I just didn’t understand where the relationship went wrong’ Woah. Me in a nutshell growing up.
@kant12
@kant12 3 жыл бұрын
Paige is kicking ass.
@Pinkfairydust23
@Pinkfairydust23 3 жыл бұрын
Your mother is so self less. My mother would just remind me that the reason I was diagnosed and doing better is cus of her. Your moms gives you all the credit and steps back and helps when needed. Awesome mom. I wish I had a mom like that :( it’s just all about u. Even like when she said “I’m sorry” after saying she KNEW you had autism. I’m a huge believer in a parent who has a child with a mental disability , learning disorders etcor anything along those lines are special people. To be able to be so selfless and make it about her really blows my mind. You two are awesome. I learned a lot today
@breezemansker3366
@breezemansker3366 3 жыл бұрын
I'm sorry your mom made you feel like that... That isn't the childhood you deserved. You are very valid, important, smart, beautiful, all of it! 🖤🖤🖤
@ajhebb
@ajhebb 3 жыл бұрын
I kid you not; I have Aspergers Syndrome and my mom is named Tracy. She is my rock because she never gave up on me when I got diagnosed at age five. She told me that if it wasn’t failing one of her high school classes, she wouldn’t have become a speech therapist, which guided her to helping me with IEP programs, sessions, etc. I was excited to see this video and I’m touched how sweet you two are together. Thank you for sharing your story with us.
@wanderingwillowblossom8106
@wanderingwillowblossom8106 3 жыл бұрын
I feel like your mom and I could be friends. Her humbleness and love for you shines through this interview. Every time she spoke I kept saying, “Me too!” Please tell her thank you for going beyond her comfort zone for this video. She’s made many of us moms feel understood. My 18 year old daughter with autism sent this link and to me. Your videos have opened up an amazing dialogue. ❤️
@linden5165
@linden5165 3 жыл бұрын
"Wow, I am different than everybody" is such a great validation and recognition to have. Without out it we endlessly wonder why we find things so hard that others find so easy. Paige's mother is AMAZING. A true friend to her adult child. Open, honest, validating, accepting.
@sortofsustainable2061
@sortofsustainable2061 3 жыл бұрын
“You’re allowed to grow and change” something I definitely needed to hear
@DMack-us4ne
@DMack-us4ne 3 жыл бұрын
"it's even harder when you're smart enough to know you don't understand it." - that hit me SO HARD. i totally know what that feeling is and i've never been able to articulate it. you're such a trooper for talking about those feelings! thank you for putting this into words!
@Lunanire
@Lunanire 3 жыл бұрын
They used to call my non verbal shutdown “giving silent treatment” and until THIS video I never understood what it actually was. Thank you for that.
@courtnrysalamone7677
@courtnrysalamone7677 3 жыл бұрын
I used to do that in school when my 4th grade teacher was giving me a hard time and singling me out and stuff and constantly thinking I was cheating or just yelling at me for no reason in general. In general when something really bothers me i either cant get words out in an emotional situation and i can only breathe and stutter or i get angry i cant get words out and all i can do is growl frustratedly. I still don't know a ton about it despite being diagnosed in like 2nd grade but I'm fairly certain thats a non verbal episode? Or a variant of one? No one really told me or would help me. They still don't really so im taking initiative to find it all out myself lol but people always call it temper tantrums and ignoring them which makes it worse cause im trying so hard lol
@lykkenss7717
@lykkenss7717 3 жыл бұрын
I feel exactly the same as you, I am not normal enough to be normal and not autistic enough. That's a hard and lonely place to be. Thank you for putting it into words!
@QueenChaslee
@QueenChaslee 3 жыл бұрын
my mom passed last may and this made me miss her so so much. ur mother is a gem, hold her close!
@ligi9560
@ligi9560 3 жыл бұрын
Message to parents: Don' try to "fix" your kids, fix yourselves and your view on humans.
@nationalgeo2191
@nationalgeo2191 3 жыл бұрын
Facts. Narc moms need to realize their issues so that they can stop giving children autism
@XLindsLuvsPinkX
@XLindsLuvsPinkX 3 жыл бұрын
You don’t know everyone’s situation. I had my miracle baby when taking an opiate for chronic pain. I call him a miracle because I was told if I wanted to have a baby, I’d most likely need IVF or to adopt. My brother, who is 3 years older than I, is autistic, my fiancé (and father of my baby) is likely autistic, and my 2 1/2 was diagnosed with autism. But there are many, many, babies born from addicts that are NOT autistic.
@XLindsLuvsPinkX
@XLindsLuvsPinkX 3 жыл бұрын
Li Gi, you are right. Our children are NOT broken. I live by the quote “I wouldn’t change you for the world, but I would change the world for you”.
@mua3588
@mua3588 3 жыл бұрын
@@nationalgeo2191 autism is in our DNA and not something we "get"! Not from treatment and not from vaccines! We are different than you neurotypicals but we aren't lesser! Being neurotypical is NOT our goal!
@nationalgeo2191
@nationalgeo2191 3 жыл бұрын
@@mua3588 well that hasn't actually been proven whether or not it's in the DNA. But there has been a whole lot of theories among realistic intelligent psychologist that think autism as well as ADHD might stem from a lack of proper maternal treatment. I never said you were a lesser person, but if those psychologists theories are true then the only lesser person is your mother
@chloeywithaY
@chloeywithaY 3 жыл бұрын
" I'm not normal enough to be normal, and I'm not autistic enough to be autistic " YES GIRL! SAME! this resonates with me soo much. I'm 24 years old and autistic. I was diagnosed at 18. I'm not very good at communicating through text / typing, so I'm not going to try and get into my specific thoughts on everything u guys covered because its probably not going to make sense.... ill just leave it simply as thank you. Thank you Paige ( and mum in this video ) for everything you do / say / share about autism. It helps me understand myself better and I know it helps others too. Thank you so so much ❤
@arlieelaine6654
@arlieelaine6654 3 жыл бұрын
Yes!!just what I wanted to say but worded better! ❤️also 24 and autistic (aspergers), so this was cool to see
@americanphilosophy2701
@americanphilosophy2701 3 жыл бұрын
That is how I feel, too! She put it so perfectly.
@galileegirl08
@galileegirl08 3 жыл бұрын
I see this resonated with so many autistic women! I think Paige should start a support group ♥️.
@kemismits6158
@kemismits6158 3 жыл бұрын
Yesss! Same 21 and #AspieSquad and I hate typing like communicating through texts. I only texts when I need to get info across or arrange something. I’m always like if ya wanna talk more call more or meet up✌🏼
@Lillyann6100
@Lillyann6100 3 жыл бұрын
PEOPLE NOT COMMUNICATING WHEN YOU DID SOMETHING WRONG OMG YES
@valerieiglar-mobley4894
@valerieiglar-mobley4894 2 жыл бұрын
I am a mom with an autistic daughter (she’s 14) and we’re watching these videos and having discussions. She relates to Paige and we both love you guys so much! Thank you for sharing this.
@beardpandaa
@beardpandaa Жыл бұрын
I think it gives me a lot of hope seeing how your mom takes accountability and ownership over her past mistakes. I think all parents make mistakes just like everybody makes mistakes. I think your mom is really great and supportive now she knows better. A lot of parents don't take ownership and deny their mistakes. A lot make excuses and end up continuing to mistreat and alienate their kid as adults. So this is refreshing for me. Humanity and compassion is nice.
@dillondramatic
@dillondramatic 3 жыл бұрын
Is everyone else's mom like this? I think I'm getting scammed
@ashleebates5708
@ashleebates5708 3 жыл бұрын
Mine is hahah but I’m the same as her haha
@laurenvanacken
@laurenvanacken 3 жыл бұрын
Owh you are not getting scammed. It’s just called ‘being lucky’ 🙈
@zen5526
@zen5526 3 жыл бұрын
🤣🤣🤣
@valorabock6325
@valorabock6325 3 жыл бұрын
♥️♥️♥️
@haileygg6
@haileygg6 3 жыл бұрын
😂😂
@MDev1997
@MDev1997 3 жыл бұрын
I would love to hear about what lead to you being diagnosed. Like the story of what the catalyst was, how you went about getting diagnosed, etc
@Alex-ir5jt
@Alex-ir5jt 3 жыл бұрын
she posted her story (not full in depth but a summary of it) on her tiktok! you should check her page and you will find it
@KyleJohnson-ms1mu
@KyleJohnson-ms1mu 3 жыл бұрын
I think she plans to do a video on this in the future. :)
@KittyCat-vu2lz
@KittyCat-vu2lz 3 жыл бұрын
IDK how she got a diagnoses but my son was diagnosed after I took him to a phycologist... she diagnosed him pretty quickly lol
@paigemackley4069
@paigemackley4069 3 жыл бұрын
@@KittyCat-vu2lz your lucky , the waiting list in the uk is over a year I’ve been waiting months to even get a test and I’m 17 now
@KittyCat-vu2lz
@KittyCat-vu2lz 3 жыл бұрын
@@paigemackley4069 oh gosh! I'm sorry :( Why does it take so long there?
@olivialindsey2232
@olivialindsey2232 3 жыл бұрын
Seeing your mom look you in your eyes and study your face as you spoke was the most beautiful display of love I have ever seen. She has so much love and admiration for you! Literally made me cry lol.
@ultraarlene3751
@ultraarlene3751 3 жыл бұрын
I can’t believe how similar you and your mom sound to my mom and myself. The back and forth, the tones, the wanting to help while also wanting me to be independent. We’re both very fortunate to have the mothers that we do.
@wowwee0
@wowwee0 3 ай бұрын
I wish my mom showed her love like this. I barely know what supportive mother-daughter relationships look like, but watching you two interact helps to understand.
@rachelm5363
@rachelm5363 3 жыл бұрын
omg when you said that you used to think, "if i were dumber, i'd be happier" and "if everyone else felt the same way I felt, they'd be having a hard time too" it really hit me. I used to say those exact same things over and over to my partner before i got diagnosed. it was one of the only ways i could think of to describe how i was feeling. thanks for sharing your story and you mom is lovely
@yaelgarcia4858
@yaelgarcia4858 3 жыл бұрын
“I feel like not normal enough to be normal but not autistic enough to autistic although I am” that’s a hundred percent how I feel!!!! You’re not alone. I always feel like I’m making it up cuz I’m not “as autistic” as others but then with normal people I feel so weird and definitely different
@noahfox179
@noahfox179 3 жыл бұрын
I had a lot of trouble feeling like I was "autistic enough" to call myself autistc. And then I remembered that a neurotypical wouldn't headbang to the point of bleeding without even noticing it as a form of coping... It was not a fun experience but it was somewhat validating in a weird way.
@noahkach
@noahkach 3 жыл бұрын
@@noahfox179 I'm worried that I'm not "autistic" enough to be diagnosed because I don't have extreme behaviors like this. The most I do is repetitively pick at scabs
@Lousea14
@Lousea14 3 жыл бұрын
@@noahkach don't fear not being autistic enough if you are having symptoms of something don't fear being tested for it. Everyone is different and that's what makes us all amazing. Even if you aren't autistic a doctor will be able to give you answers or a diagnosis. (I hope this made sense and I explained it correctly)
@aineemac
@aineemac 3 жыл бұрын
@@noahkach being on the Autistic Spectrum doesn't necessarily involve any 'exteme behaviours' at all. If you wanted to see if you were likely on the spectrum there's a test called the autism quotient that can be done online & would likely give you a good indication of if you're likely on the spectrum
@ancelinee3169
@ancelinee3169 3 жыл бұрын
"Everyone thinks I'm too good, so they don't care about me." I relate to this so much!!! It took two of my younger siblings being diagnosed, before I put two and two together and figured out at 30 years old that I probably was autistic too. I was just able to compensate for it publicly. Internally and in private, I was a wreck for most of my teens and early twenties. Nobody listened when I asked for help though, because outwardly I made everything look easy.
@faeriesmak
@faeriesmak 3 жыл бұрын
I am sorry that this happened to you. It’s my reality as well.
@abbzeh137
@abbzeh137 3 жыл бұрын
I'm almost 30, recently diagnosed with ADHD and having a hard time understanding how people can be so cruel and how they can cope with everyone being so cruel cos I can't!
@jaisweet525
@jaisweet525 3 жыл бұрын
I have two daughters with autism and I pray that they grow to be as well spoken and connected emotionally as you seem to be. You and your mom are beautiful! Thank you for sharing
@wadnold123
@wadnold123 3 жыл бұрын
T_T your mom seems like one of the most genuine empathetic people on this planet and I’m so glad you have her or else you would’ve been so misunderstood and so much more unhappy at your home base.
@samisiarc
@samisiarc 3 жыл бұрын
I love how she put in a kindness reminder. It’s also wonderful that she participated in this video even though she was so nervous. A+ Mama!
@stephaniecasado8829
@stephaniecasado8829 3 жыл бұрын
This is the most adorable and supportive mother/ daughter relationship
@thegracklepeck
@thegracklepeck 2 жыл бұрын
I just cried and cried watching this. Your childhood meltdowns sound exactly like what I experienced growing up. I couldn't explain what was going on and it was always misunderstood by the adults in my life. I always felt like no one cared and that I wasn't loved because they would try to force me to do "normal" things and it was always so overwhelming and I couldn't vocalize that.
@khalyasongofnerdsandwriter5473
@khalyasongofnerdsandwriter5473 3 жыл бұрын
Aw, Mom did amazing! Most parents miss autism early, I had knowledge from a younger cousin being autism, so when I saw my two children acting in certain ways, I raised questions with my pediatrician and got my girls into early intervention. You both are so strong, I hope you two keep chugging along and all the blessings in the world to you and your mother.
@msophie.22
@msophie.22 3 жыл бұрын
“I think there’s a difference between wanting to have friends and not wanting to feel lonely” you’re so eloquent and beautiful from the inside out omg your compassion radiates! I don’t have tik tok so I’m glad you were recommended to me
@SummerSideUppp
@SummerSideUppp 3 жыл бұрын
My daughter is 3 years old shes non-verbal but shes trying to sing! Hearing that you did that gives me so much hope 🙏
@alexrose20
@alexrose20 3 жыл бұрын
In the middle of the video you've already brought me to tears. I want friends but I don't have any friends. And I'd rather not have friends than be around "friends" who just make me feel alienated. I'm fine being by myself and alone but being around other ppl is what makes me feel like the lonliest person ever.
@maddie4742
@maddie4742 3 жыл бұрын
I’m so sorry, I know how hard it is to make friends. Sometimes it can be overwhelming but I’m sure you will meet some amazing people in your life!
@sierratetzlaff8402
@sierratetzlaff8402 2 жыл бұрын
the part where you talked about your tears not being taken seriously gave me full body chills. i haven’t had a single unique experience in my entire life
@katherinos
@katherinos 3 жыл бұрын
Your mum is so self aware and a good listener. Wish I could have these kind of convos with my mother without her trying to make it all about herself and deflect all of my concerns/questions
@janaekoger-hunt643
@janaekoger-hunt643 3 жыл бұрын
I am so amazed at your mom's ability to listen to her shortcomings and validate your feelings and experiences.
@sarasabeleer
@sarasabeleer 3 жыл бұрын
When Paige cried because nobody had brought it up before she got diagnosed, at first I was confused because well as a non-autistic person I couldn’t possibly understand how it feels like to be so frustrated knowing that your brain doesn’t work the same way as other people and nobody noticing... I hope I explained myself, thank you for doing this videos and explaining autism to the world Paige, you are doing an amazing thing❤️
@ihopeicanchangethisnamelat7108
@ihopeicanchangethisnamelat7108 3 жыл бұрын
This is the way I feel. I think there is definitely an issue with me, I don’t think I’m autistic, but there is definitely something wrong with me, but I think everyone else thinks I’m just weird, especially as I’m also pretty socially young, I’m not sure if that’s the way of saying it. One of my friends said last week that I’m ‘stuck in Year 5’ which is basically the best way I can think of describing it. Year 5 is 9-10 years old in England. I’m academically older than my age, so there’s also that that makes me different to everyone else. And it’s like I know that there’s something wrong with me, but no one else realises that maybe crying because I forgot a piece of homework is a problem, and I’m also worried that if anyone noticed there was a problem they’d just think I was attention-seeking because most teenagers don’t cry about stuff like that, and I don’t cry at important things, like when my grandparents died, obviously I was really upset, but I didn’t cry even though I knew I was supposed to. I don’t speak a lot, I can, I just don’t and I’m not very loud so it’s very easy for people not to hear me or not to listen. I was the ‘gifted’ kid when I was in primary school, so was my sister, and she still is now, but since about halfway through Year 7 I’ve just kind of stopped being good at stuff I used to be able to do. That’s not really what it is, it’s like I know how to do stuff but I don’t understand how I can do it any more. No one really puts me under pressure to do well, it’s more of an expected thing that I do well at everything. Like, not as if if I do badly anyone will be angry, but like there’s no possible scenario in anyone else’s minds where I fail at anything. I also fidget a lot, I think that’s to do with anxiety, and I used to have a problem with pulling my hair out but my mum yelled at me enough whenever I touched my hair to make me stop. Now I crack my knuckles and pinch my fingertips, which annoys her a lot but at least it isn’t harmful. Sorry about the long reply talking about myself, I always find it annoying when people do this, but I just wanted to vent a bit.
@fuzbcuz7613
@fuzbcuz7613 3 жыл бұрын
@@ihopeicanchangethisnamelat7108 It sounds like you should speak with a doctor or therapist if you haven't already. There's a problem if you feel like you aren't able to live fully. I'd share with the specialist what you've written here. Advocate for yourself; if the first doc you visit doesn't take you seriously then visit someone else. Your feelings are valid. Your observations about yourself are worth looking into.
@faeriesmak
@faeriesmak 3 жыл бұрын
I have felt like this my entire life.
@loriel345
@loriel345 3 жыл бұрын
You’re mom is so sweet and supportive. Her strength and kindness radiates in this video.
@lizisca
@lizisca 3 жыл бұрын
“The MORE you know , the more you DON’T know” 🤔 soo smart
@leeleeb7413
@leeleeb7413 2 жыл бұрын
Omg. I just learned so much…not even about autism, but about how I DESPERATELY want to try to validate and listen to my kids. Your mom seems kind and you STILL didn’t feel comfortable in the end because of how she acted when you were younger! I remember when I first decided to not cry to my mom because I knew she’d spank me for crying over something stupid. I was five years old…
@ryleeburnand9776
@ryleeburnand9776 3 жыл бұрын
I hope Paige knows that in my head whenever I see her I think “it’s the girl with the SUPER pretty highlight!”
@vitaliialaz8
@vitaliialaz8 3 жыл бұрын
right! I can’t stop looking at it😍
@hasmodea9533
@hasmodea9533 3 жыл бұрын
You are stating FACTS 🤣
@Barbiegirl342
@Barbiegirl342 3 жыл бұрын
I cried like 6 different times. There’s things I can relate to in a different way, there’s so much beauty, and there’s so much inspiration. Just the different perspectives yet the understanding and love between you two and the world is soooooo unbelievably beautiful. Keep on doing what you’re doing.
@jjhahn34
@jjhahn34 3 жыл бұрын
You remind me so much of my almost 17 yr old. She just got diagnosed with Autism at 15. You have very similar traits. I even had people question if she was really Autistic. Because she's extremely intelligent. With lots of talents. I new something was different with her from a very young age. But no one would listen to me,and teachers would just say she was very shy. Until I took her therapist At her request at 15. I'm glad I have found your page,because you have helped me understand my child so much more.
@richiemcconnochie2506
@richiemcconnochie2506 3 жыл бұрын
Try. kzbin.info/www/bejne/oKWxnKKNr713Z5Y
@rosie6730
@rosie6730 3 жыл бұрын
you are such an amazing mum for doing your research
@M0tHerT0LdY0uN0tT0STaRe
@M0tHerT0LdY0uN0tT0STaRe 3 жыл бұрын
The way she looked at her mom so genuinely and said you are allowed to grow and change hits different ❤️
@Aubreeannabellerose
@Aubreeannabellerose 3 жыл бұрын
I have a 6 year old daughter who is on the waiting list for an autism assessment, your mum is amazing. My daughter has some similar traits to you but she’s behind in school. I didn’t even realise what a broad spectrum Autism is. You’re a lovely girl, thank you for speaking about this. Xx
@sneakerq
@sneakerq 3 жыл бұрын
I think my dad feels the same about a lot of these topics. Like he never saw anything wrong with me it was just how I was.
@emelliott
@emelliott 3 жыл бұрын
My dad didn’t believe I was autistic because he had the mindset “she’s just weird and quirky”
@maliyahhale1223
@maliyahhale1223 3 жыл бұрын
@@emelliott Or be like "You just learn slowly than others".
@sneakerq
@sneakerq 3 жыл бұрын
@@coloringbunnies1273 Whenever I bring something up to my dad that I did when I was younger might be because I'm autistic he tells me to stop looking for things that are wrong with me but I don't see it like that at all. I think it's just interesting and I'm also trying to consolidate stuff for when I can finally get an eval too
@sneakerq
@sneakerq 3 жыл бұрын
@@coloringbunnies1273 I think a lot of the time parent don't want to admit that their child might have a disorder or mental illness because they think that it might be their fault. So if they don't admit it then there's nothing wrong.
@elizabethmcintosh6722
@elizabethmcintosh6722 3 жыл бұрын
Same with my parents, but I suspect a lot of what they thought was normal was normal to them because they’re undiagnosed autistic.
@searranolan1010
@searranolan1010 3 жыл бұрын
Your lack of eye contact is so so meaningful and beautiful to my heart.
@SarienaShares
@SarienaShares 3 жыл бұрын
Honestly having a mom who is this reflexive and open is so powerful. I really love your relationship. The recognition for your mom’s potential burn out, growth, changes, is so helpful for your mom as a woman at the end of day. Love love love this
@rlena25
@rlena25 3 жыл бұрын
I am so glad I ran across this. My son is 21 and has asperger's. My daughter is 8 and has suspected autism, but she is on a different level than him. She is getting ready to be tested. It is great to hear from someone about how they feel, so it can help me understand her better when she is upset about something that we would think would be minor. Thankfully having one child that is autistic has helped me pick up of cue's that she is probably too. Hers are more emotional and sensory. You are a brave girl and you are going to go places in life.
@venisuasia
@venisuasia 3 жыл бұрын
Y’all have a beautiful bond. Your mom seems like a gentle empathetic woman 🖤
@zackreed6010
@zackreed6010 3 жыл бұрын
It's sad to say just how many parents do not live up to her level of understanding and compassion. 💚
@pavlatrembulakova2514
@pavlatrembulakova2514 3 жыл бұрын
Paige, your phrase "I am not normal enough to be normal and I am not autistic enough to be autistic" hit me, because that is how I feel all the time. I am afraid to talk to my friends about this, because they accept me without it. I am afraid do seek official diagnosis because right now I feel like it won!t help me figure things out. There is even small chance that I am not autistic and I will not get the diagnosis which means I am going to stop feeling like part of something. Not to mention, in my country you wait for evaluation for approx. 15 months and it is expensive as hell. Your Mum seems very understanding and like she is trying so much to understand. I hope both of you will grow as you did in the past according the descriptions both of you gave in this video.
@Jessicaah1
@Jessicaah1 3 жыл бұрын
Same.. I got diagnosed 2 years ago, and I was seeking help 1 week ago, because I needed a study environment at school that could work for me. They could not help me with that.. they offered me some other things but not the things I needed which is frustrating. I struggle a lot with feeling like Im not autistic enough. Im just weird and cant get friends.
@pavlatrembulakova2514
@pavlatrembulakova2514 3 жыл бұрын
@@Jessicaah1 Sorry to hear that. I was lonely at my first year at uni and I couldn't comprehend how my classmates coped with school so well. Then I found out my classmate is probably autistic (she is self-diagnosed). We've been friends for almost a year and we share tips on how do we cope with current school situation we are in. Do you know anyone from your school/work enviroment? It helped me to have someone to struggle with.
@valkyeria
@valkyeria 3 жыл бұрын
It's so nice to learn about autism from people who experience firsthand and also very refreshing to see a parent talk about it in a positive light, because so often all you hear from them is the hard parts, so seeing how much your mom has tried to understand you and not change you, is very very nice
@rantingintothevoid
@rantingintothevoid 3 жыл бұрын
Your mom is absolutely amazing. Her empathy, her listening, willingness to learn and understand. I’ve dealt with mental illness since I was a little girl and it didn’t help that I had an abusive mother. I can only pray Im half the mom yours is someday🤍🙌🏼
@tararaboom
@tararaboom 3 жыл бұрын
As a mum of daughter who is almost 2.5 years old when you mentioned people not believing you when you suspected something was up, that was me the last few years. I saw my daughter in a different way that many others didn't. We finally got a diagnosis and help. I was told by her speech pathologist that she was amazed that I managed to see the signs as they can be quite difficult to see in girls. It was my pushing for a diagnosis that led to her finally getting the help she needs to develop her social skills.
@sqwuishslay
@sqwuishslay 3 жыл бұрын
i felt exactly the same way when you realized that no teachers or adults saw anything that could be related to autism. i have severe adhd, and as much as the struggles of adhd and autism are different, they definitely overlap. no teachers ever had a clue that i was struggling socially and academically, and treated me like a problem rather than how my brain works. i am so incredibly sorry you went through this.
@meganiswatchingthis
@meganiswatchingthis 3 жыл бұрын
I had the same experience - ADHD as hell but always seen as “too intelligent” and “too much trouble” - I’m sorry you went through that too!! ❤️
@meganiswatchingthis
@meganiswatchingthis 3 жыл бұрын
(I should add that I also have dyscalculia and was struggling through school too, but the social aspect was by far the most difficult part.)
@carochan86
@carochan86 3 жыл бұрын
I have ADHD as well. I didn't get diagnosed till I was 19. I passed by in the background. I had A day Bday schedule from 6- 12th so I had my habits I guess. I didn't realize till after I got done college I could have gotten extra time for tests but I never wanted it or cared to try. I originally knew my family had stuff so what do I have and why can't I pass my classes like I use to? I looked up ADD online and went to my doctor and explained my issue.
@carochan86
@carochan86 3 жыл бұрын
@@meganiswatchingthis my Dad had dyslexia. Whenever a movie had subtitles I would read them for him . He would switch basic things around all the time. We went on a trip and I was giving directions so told him right knowing he would go left.
@carochan86
@carochan86 3 жыл бұрын
@@meganiswatchingthis I can't hold numbers in my head. I can do basic but when it comes to doing larger math in my head I'm terrible. I went for a test for my ADD and the person saw some signs of dyslexia but wasn't certain.
@elanaj3174
@elanaj3174 3 жыл бұрын
I have learned a lot about autism from you, I have found that I understand my autistic brother better! Thank you so, so much!
@richiemcconnochie2506
@richiemcconnochie2506 3 жыл бұрын
Try. kzbin.info/www/bejne/oKWxnKKNr713Z5Y
@TheGoldenIzzy
@TheGoldenIzzy 3 жыл бұрын
I’m only just seen this video and I agree
@cjohnson6357
@cjohnson6357 3 жыл бұрын
“noooo there’s FACTS, and then there’s opinions based on facts” is so me. people always get mad at me about this too but it’s the TRUTH! some things are facts, and it doesn’t make sense to disagree with them?? great video paige thanks!
@selenathetabby
@selenathetabby 3 жыл бұрын
I live by this so much and people tell me I’m this-phobic and that-phobicXD
@alyssasimoes3443
@alyssasimoes3443 3 жыл бұрын
@@selenathetabby i’d bet the facts you’re clinging to in that case are “opinions based on fact”. i’m curious what those are if you care to share?
@selenathetabby
@selenathetabby 3 жыл бұрын
@@alyssasimoes3443Plus, I took a Criminology class with a cop and she told us that cops need to apply force on criminals who defy their orders as a means of self-defense and (although I knew about it before she told us) I was given shit for it for bringing it up elsewhere.
@novacas5481
@novacas5481 Жыл бұрын
Paige you are the reason I was assessed and diagnosed at the age of 27. I had no clue until I saw your tik toks. My son was diagnosed and I never even considered myself until I saw your video "autism in girls". Everyone thought I was ridiculous. "You don't look autistic" was the reply. I even got some "I'm sorry" when I was diagnosed lol. I know who I am and why I am the way I am because of YOU. I'm so thankful you used your voice to speak on this and being awareness. Thank you.
@chantelc6056
@chantelc6056 3 жыл бұрын
Mama is so supportive, it's great to see this relationship between a parent and their child
@sirwatzhizface
@sirwatzhizface 3 жыл бұрын
I only recently found out from my psychiatrist that i might have autism, but you are like one of my heros now
@jadeuneun
@jadeuneun 3 жыл бұрын
"I had baileys in my coffee cup this morning" is a whole MOOD
@laur9146
@laur9146 3 жыл бұрын
I had the biggest laugh at that; totally unexpected lmao
@MrNinjaFish
@MrNinjaFish 3 жыл бұрын
You ever drunk baileys from a shoe
@nikweinfurter5578
@nikweinfurter5578 3 жыл бұрын
@Devos Lemmens someone doesn’t know about Old Gregg
@tammylt5004
@tammylt5004 3 жыл бұрын
Thank you for this. As a mom I totally identified with this. I had a fairly good understanding of autism (17 years ago) and it was very difficult to get someone to recognize that my child needed an assessment "he's just too smart to be autistic."
@sparky4786
@sparky4786 8 ай бұрын
This is so helpful. Thanks for posting and thank you to your mom for stepping outside her comfort zone and opening herself up to potential criticism. Taking a chance helped this viewer.
@BexMcInulty
@BexMcInulty 3 жыл бұрын
Woah. Your mom is so kind and empathetic I'm honestly blown away. I can see where you got that from, Paige
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