#RealTalk

[@zamanene1957]

Side note: I hope some day you will be a radio host ❤ you speak so eloquently, you’re smart and funny.

[@gomolemomasegokau6504]

Ryt.....I love her❤

[@Bookedoncharity]

So true hey

[@MissCombs1511]

I agree!

[@KatlehoMallela]

Awwww this is so so sweet! I have been told this so many times, I truly do hope it's in my future. I would love to.

[@sulezinyembezigqeba]

❤💯

[@mphonellymothibedi3363]

I would really appreciate a part 2. I am an introvert trying to navigate varsity and now I finally get why I can't maintain friendships. And sometimes as introverted people, we automatically assume that our friends and loved ones will understand how we are and we contribute to relationships and that really is not the case. So thank you so much sis Kat❤

[@KatlehoMallela]

Absolutely true.... I got you girl 😉

[@Bookedoncharity]

This is the kind of conversation that everyone can relate to. I think in order to keep certain friendships “alive” people tend to avoid having difficult conversations surrounding the changes in their lives.

[@KatlehoMallela]

Absolutely 💯

[@vuyimamaimane2297]

One of my friends once told me that people grow apart, and I think she grew apart from me, I've learned to let go, I never want to impose myself where I'm not needed, I didn't ask anything, I just closed that door of my journey with her

[@otengmooke2091]

someone also told me this ,then slowly started to distance herself, soon she was gone.It hurt but I accepted. Very tough to navigate

[@vuyimamaimane2297]

@@otengmooke2091 it is hurting, but where love is no more served, we pull ourselves out 👌🏾

[@KatlehoMallela]

That must've been so hard to do. I'm so sorry to hear that.

[@KatlehoMallela]

Absolutely, sometimes self preservation entails you HAVING to pull yourself out.

[@MissCombs1511]

🤔 you see that part there Kat.. that part where a friend gets married and you are still dating from guy to guy? I don't believe in telling the married friend about any of the guys.. and DEFINITELY not let her husband ever meet him. She's in a different place now, and if the hubby sees or hears of your "search" you will be looked at as the loose friend and will probably keep his wife away from you.

[@shekinahmaimane]

Hmmm!! True 🙌🏽

[@KatlehoMallela]

YES! I'm inclined to agree, as the single and dating friend, keep your personal intimate life away from your married friend... you'll become pillow talk and the husband will DEFINITELY make judgements.

[@nomz401]

This is the golden age. The age of truth and light and unfortunately, where there is no energetic match or alignment in frequency friendships cannot last. Experiencing this regularly in this phase of my life and honestly I encourage us all to be true to ourselves and live in our truth ❤. Those who align will come ❤

[@KatlehoMallela]

Yes yes and YES!!!

[@onkabetsweoratilengwasheng212]

Things do change in friendships and yohh it’s painful shem, the disbelief that hits you gore vele things are not the same😢. Mara it takes communication, adjusting, or even move on, and definitely staying open to new connections. We need to accept that some friendships were for a season in our lives.

[@KatlehoMallela]

Absolutely!!!

[@zakhelecyril1877]

My first time commenting but I’ve subscribed years ago… I love your sister, this video is so informative. Please do more of such segments ❤ Love, Mthethwa Zakhele

[@KatlehoMallela]

I would love to! All suggestions are welcome too and go a long way to creating these videos too! :)

[@Elizabeth-vu1tb]

We are like that even in relationships; HOLDING ON TO WHAT WAS… But I look at men; and I ask myself how do they do it. They can be in COMPLETELY different era’s in life. They will be there. Through and through.. if anything; only when they are getting married. They can drift because of their wives etc… either than that; if they can marry women who can become friends too. They will be together FOREVER.

[@KatlehoMallela]

Very good point.

[@puseletsomolikeng9952]

I enjoyed this video. Hey adults friendships can be so tricky at times 😜 Communication is very important in order to sustain lasting friendships 🤗

[@KatlehoMallela]

Quite tricky, but female bonds are so important that they are worth fighting for.

[@thandig3683]

Kat I'm experiencing the shift in dynamics with a friend and iv really had to dig deep and understand why we become friends in the first place. I don't think we will make it and I'm not sure if I want to make it🤔. Perhaps time to let go. I really took my time to watch this because it hits home. Thank you for this....much needed ❤

[@maseramemolumo1440]

So many amen moments on this video - if they hurt you let them know - if people need space or have set boundaries respect that People change, our journeys may also change In the next one can you also talk about how to navigate friendship breakups - a little breakup etiquette…

[@lorrainenkosi7940]

Trauma dumping I thought I was not fair for thinking that my friend is doing it too much because she never calls to check on me it’s always a long stream of voice notes of family fights 😢then a 2 hour call where she’s just venting but I’m used to it now I guess

[@silindilembongwa8379]

Sooo much truth into this. I easily get hurt when my love is not reciprocated! Someone I considered a best friend posted about her pregnancy on Instagram and I only found out then. So heartbreaking. I didn’t even attend the babyshower. I’m so hurt.

[@hazelnutbar]

So sorry babes, friendships can be tricky.

[@KatlehoMallela]

Awwww sorry hun *hug* You will be ok. Know about where people put you in life, and act accordingly. Doesn't make it hurt any less though. :)

[@Andy-hz3nm]

Great video Kat,,ey adult friendships are tricky these days,, As for me I'm on a break I will see maybe after 3 years🤣😂I can't deal with human beings ke busy,,,Thanks for the chat,,A big yes for part 2❤️❤️

[@Rosey-Dik]

Loved this❤❤❤

[@mahlohonololebuso741]

Mooooore😩😩😩 we need more of these😄😄❤❤

[@Thulare_Ramokgopa]

Thank you for this video🤍🤍 Female group friendships ke no! No! Got into one in my matric year and a year after that it fell apart. I got into another one in varsity and it fell apart also. When I left SA I made a promise to self to NOT involve myself in a group and listen, I am not looking back! Personally i enjoy my one-on-one friendships😇

[@hazelnutbar]

I love and prefer one on one friendships too. They make sense.

[@KatlehoMallela]

Female group situations are often very tricky to manage!, I agree that the bigger the group, the more the issues to be honest. I'm more comfortable with a small group of friends, and mostly when we meet up it's a pair or trio situation.

[@shekinahmaimane]

Thanks for the video Kat. It’s so important for us to realise that friendships also need the same investment as romantic relationships. I think it’s also important to realise that we love different and that our friends love different too. I’ve learned to accept that even though I often reach out more, it doesn’t mean they love me any less. And there are some friends that reach out more to me than I do to them. Please give us a part 2.

[@KatlehoMallela]

I hear the part that we must understand that we love different. But you also deserve your friends to pick up the slack and reach out and put in effort. Just because they love different, doesn't mean you should be ok with their bare minimum and your heavy lifting. No ways babes.

[@shekinahmaimane]

@@KatlehoMallela True!! 🙌🏽🙌🏽. Very true 🙌🏽🙌🏽

[@MpumiMQueenetle]

Thank you, Kat, for the RealTalk, nice chat! Now that we've identified what bums our friendships, please do part 2 of this video so that we can do better and sustain the few friendships we have left 😂❤ also thank you for having real conversations with us 🎉much appreciated hun ❤❤

[@KatlehoMallela]

☺️☺️

[@MpumiMQueenetle]

@@KatlehoMallela ❤️

[@busiswanjingana5071]

Friendship break ups are the worst 😢,my friend and I had a "little misunderstanding and we stopped talking ror abt a year that was one of the difficult time bt some time this year we talked abt it and we are good now not best bt we are getting there

[@KatlehoMallela]

Slowly but surely you will get there

[@mihlaliqoyi5982]

Part 2 please.... Learnt a lot from this one❤

[@ndediinnocentia540]

Part 2 please ♥️♥️

[@Elizabeth-vu1tb]

We are here..💃🏾❤️

[@sibongileradebenkomo3984]

For the love of JK ❤❤❤

[@KatlehoMallela]

Captain my captain!!! Welcome!

[@hudihoodz]

We are still here ❤

[@nombuyiselomanala2519]

I also am imperfect, I don't blame it entirely on them, but please COMMUNICATE!!! and love me genuinely without envy, we don't have to have same achievements or same things 🙄🙄🙄

[@KatlehoMallela]

Yes! 👏

[@sinegugubuthelezi]

very wholesome ❤❤❤

[@nandiphampinip254]

After 8 years of what I thought was a solid sisterhood. They showed me putra from out of this world😂 Shuu I'm triggered, but I'm at a better space now😅 Adult friendships are worse than romantic relationships 🚮

[@pinkhappynesslady5331]

I really need this

[@TheBAHUBSA]

Men keep their friends throughout the years, I've been married for 5 years and have lost friends which I am okay with but it gets so lonely sometimes while my partner has his squad, I hang out alone on solo dates.

[@LethoHali]

Adult friendships be tricky sometimes

[@phumlaheleni5692]

❤❤❤

[@MissCombs1511]

Mara mos advice is just an addition to the options you already have? If you don't take my advice, it means you went with option C. 🤷🏽‍♀️ My job is to trust your decision making capacity otherwise we shouldn't be friends at all. By the way, if we can't laugh about option C not working out then we STILL can't be friends. We're friends hle, not siamese twins.

[@KatlehoMallela]

SAY IT LOUDER FOR THE ONES IN THE BACK PLEEEAAASSEEEE!!!!! This one touched me personally! Louder!!!

[@thandig3683]

But why do friends take themselves so seriously that we can't laugh about option C😅 like I agree with you.

[@MissCombs1511]

@@thandig3683 you know? When the time is right, she needs to know I won't say "I told you so", one of us will crack a joke, we'll give Option C a name and keep it moving. I'm next probably, and I also need a soft place to land..

[@mathapelomonnakgotla7395]

My cousin hurt me so much. She stole my white new hoodie now it has a stain. But I won't start that topic. She is 43 yrs old she had no right to take my thing without asking for it! I'm so hurt

[@AmantlePetros]

Am that friend 😂😂😂

[@nombuyiselomanala2519]

I don't have many friends, and it's not just starting now in my 30s,its something that has always been that way, my reasons are that I came across people who were not as invested in me the way I was in them, on top of that I experienced that people do not communicate, if you made them feel some typpa way they don't tell you, then become passive aggressive (ohh I been subbed on socials ), then the jealousy, copying, belittling me to make themselves feel better, hey it's a lot, there is more stuff but the comment is already long, my experience, especially in female friendship is just👎🏽👎🏽👎🏽👎🏽

[@TueloSeroto-oy6ix]

Same here , I don't have friends and I don't want them because I met toxic people thinking that they are my friends. Thank God am nolonger part of their lives anymore!

[@KatlehoMallela]

I have experienced the exact some things you've gone through.... 🫂 the smaller our circles, the safer we feel tbh.

[@AmantlePetros]

❤❤❤🎉

[@TueloSeroto-oy6ix]

😊❤❤❤

[@thatokheekhe2810]

❤😊

[@lethu6413]

Yoh! This is a serious topic, neh, but every now and then, during the video, I kept thinking, "I'd book Katleho as a makeup artist with my last cents" 🤌🏿 I love how you've mastered applying makeup, seemless. ❤

[@KatlehoMallela]

LOL!!! I used to do makeup actually. But those days are long gone babe LOL

[@maseramemolumo1440]

So many amen moments on this video - if they hurt you let them know - if people need space or have set boundaries respect that People change, our journeys may also change In the next one can you also talk about how to navigate friendship breakups - a little breakup etiquette…

[@KatlehoMallela]

Hmmmm that's a very interesting topic that one, so hmmm yea I'll look into that!

[@lillianletlaka5868]

❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

[@kwakha6103]

❤❤❤❤

[@MillenialKay]

❤❤❤

[@mananahlalele6405]

❤❤❤❤