"I'm Tom Selleck for long-stairs basement laundry" was a great line.
@MpowerdAPE4 жыл бұрын
Elder abuse has never been funnier. Thank you Tom Selleck
@onlyofficial Жыл бұрын
i can assure you these old fucks dont get routinely smacked.
@georgekeane6533 Жыл бұрын
The Magnum-tude of this issue personally irritable or p.i.
@johnbranson32984 жыл бұрын
Ant is the best Sit Down comedian. Hilarious!
@GerardPerry4 жыл бұрын
Take that, Big Jay Oakerson!
@hoyit4 жыл бұрын
Sit down comedian. I like that 😄
@timothycormier34944 жыл бұрын
Ever!😂😂😂😂😂
@johnwisniewski87124 жыл бұрын
Sit down comedian...why didn’t I think of that?? That is golden!
@charlesdarwin72533 жыл бұрын
Patrice O'Neil bless his soul, would fit that label perfectly, granted he could barely fit the stage and had to sit down throughout the whole set
@RevPerdueJosh4 жыл бұрын
“This ain’t my first rodeo, but it will be your grandparent’s last.”
@Noone92273 жыл бұрын
So true! Good one!
@lowfrequency11804 жыл бұрын
When the 80’s mustachio actor tells you at the end of a commercial that it’s “not for everyone,” it not for you.
@WhoBeSilly4 жыл бұрын
Ha ha ha ha! That's seriously the best joke in the comments right now!!!!
@williamhaynes70898 ай бұрын
love how Dave ramsey says not to buy somthing just because "fonzie" told you too.. same here magnum pi telling you to use this product.
@B81Mack4 жыл бұрын
I'm glad someone else sees the blatant scam in these horrific con-games. Thanks Anthony.
@APAL880 Жыл бұрын
Couldn't we say that mortgages in general are scams as well?
@andychow5509 Жыл бұрын
@@APAL880 Neither are scams. I don't think there would many home owners if everyone had to buy with a lump sum. And in the reverse, say you're an old person with a fixed income, it makes sense to supplement that income with a reverse mortgage, rather than to have to sell your house for a lump sum and be forced to rent for an unpredictable amount of time. No one forces anyone to use financial tools, and legally all obligations and risks are explained. The ability in general to borrow and lend money securely and at predictable interest rates is what built the US into a superpower.
@Markdfadf Жыл бұрын
@@andychow5509 For some reason this popped up on my KZbin. Reverse mortgages are not a scam. My grandma had no assets and needed it to live. It was her only source of money. I encouraged her to do it and it was a good decision. I don't even remotely get the objection.
@yashpatel26111 ай бұрын
@@Markdfadf If she has no assets how did she get a reverse mortgage ?
@brandonobaza86104 жыл бұрын
"I'm Tom Selleck, with Soylent Mortgage..."
@gurgy34 жыл бұрын
Tom Selleck here, have you seen the new line of Waco barbecues?
@williampoole17424 жыл бұрын
Tom Sellick here with Kaczynski Mail Delivery
@hulkangry55463 жыл бұрын
👍😂😂😂😂
@joshleonard67724 жыл бұрын
Dave needed to shave his head so Anthony was reminded of Little Jimmy when he sees it bobbing from behind and above.
@benkays38864 жыл бұрын
Too much testosterone in his voice to be Jimmy
@Nunya_Bidness_533 жыл бұрын
"I'm a paid actor. I would never pretend the product I'm paid to endorse is good when it's not."
@brennanj78434 жыл бұрын
Here’s a $10k loan on your home that you’ve got $150k of equity in, and don’t read the fine print that says we can sell your house when you die to an investor we know for $150k under value.
@meesterSmeeth41824 жыл бұрын
"Do you want some extra cash for Pall Malls and Scratch Off lottery tickets while also leaving your children nothing? Well have I got good news for you." - Tom Selleck; multiple rodeo goer
@bergydermeister56164 жыл бұрын
Lol indeed so damb obvious
@pauldelasco4 жыл бұрын
Camels n Vodka here lol
@SmokeymcJoint4204 жыл бұрын
"multiple rodeo goer" is gold.
@shaiapouf4204 жыл бұрын
red 100s and $1 lotto tix cuz "you never know"
@cmendr0114 жыл бұрын
No joke, when I see people playing the lotto, I always say to myself “you deserve to be poor”. Because they’re pissing money they need to advance on a .01% chance at maybe winning it big. And people who win the lotto usually end up dead.
@blaisetelfer84994 жыл бұрын
Anthony is spot on with the Fox News ads. I've lost count of how many times Rosland Capital has urged me to buy gold and buy a Passover meal for a Holocaust survivor in Europe.
@elonmust7470 Жыл бұрын
The holocaust commercial is the cringiest thing I've ever seen...
@Serenitynowwwww Жыл бұрын
@@elonmust7470 JEWS AND CHRISTIANS TOGETHERRRRR😊
@jameson3500 Жыл бұрын
A whole country of bankers, but they need our money. SUREE,
@tayzk5929 Жыл бұрын
Crazy how the number of holocaust survivors increase ever year...🤔
@chrisw61645 ай бұрын
“Buy a meal for a 112 year old lady who may or may not exist”
@sonomawinetourdrivers38952 жыл бұрын
My mom was on a reverse mortgage and when she passed the bank gave us sixty days "to get the fuck out!" ...then the wolves start scratching on the front door...
@ale583014 жыл бұрын
"If you're interested we'll send you some brochures. On the front is a picture of you without shelter"
@theplayersclub11263 жыл бұрын
dude..hilarious comment...
@peterpratsch72234 жыл бұрын
“ Are you on your 29’th year of a 30 year mortgage? We’ll give you $500 a month, poison you and steal your home.”
@Primus-ue4th4 жыл бұрын
It’s good for a widow that knows she won’t make it too many more years and doesn’t have anyone that can financially take care of them.
@robotsaysbeebooboop4 жыл бұрын
@@Primus-ue4th ok Howie Hoo Hoo Robin
@bizzzzzzle4 жыл бұрын
Howard Walters exactly, my Aunt, more family friend, has no family or kids and it let her travel in her last years.
@jewsco4 жыл бұрын
Howard Walters it’s good if you don’t have kids or anyone to pass the house too but bad if you do have heirs
@Wolfman78704 жыл бұрын
@@jewsco unless your hiers are bad people who don't really care about you and you want to screw them over.
@garpfunkel28764 жыл бұрын
"A Reverse Mortgage isn't a way to take your moustache."
@chrisphillips24014 жыл бұрын
Anthony will always be one of the greats in radio and comedy! I'm pretty sure anthony would have been an all time comedian if he would have gotten into comedy.
@orenthalsimpson4 жыл бұрын
I trust his stern facial expression and very dark mustache
@shidizradicchio48254 жыл бұрын
Tom "Hey, ever taken a reverse-cowgirl mustache ride?" Selleck
@tooterooterville4 жыл бұрын
No, but I'm sure he's given them.
@BrianCronmiller4 жыл бұрын
Meanwhile in Magnum PI, he literally took someone else's house.
@pauldelasco4 жыл бұрын
Guest house!!! Lol
@pauldelasco4 жыл бұрын
@Payne Killer lol!!!
@BrianCronmiller4 жыл бұрын
And when you get to the end of the series you find out that the guy who was his butler the whole time "Higgins" was really Robin the Billionaire. So a Billionaire let Magnum live in his house while he served him for 8 seasons! - edited spelling mistake thanks JV
@earthsucks95554 жыл бұрын
He was diddling dobermans
@unlimitedpower41013 жыл бұрын
@@BrianCronmiller if you actually watched older episodes it absolutely was not Higgins. Robin Masters literally is in episodes just not his face. Nor did the end of the series confirm it. It was just anecdotal.
@joannewilson10213 жыл бұрын
1st ad he's in the house, 2nd he's sitting in the woods living next to a tent. Pretty much sums it up.
@drewfuerstenberger46754 жыл бұрын
I'm in the mortgage industry and crack up every time I see this commercial. "When you leave your home," is a euphemism for, "when granny kicks the bucket..."
@wes11bravo2 жыл бұрын
Drew - are you saying "when you leave your home" doesn't mean when Gran goes for an Alaskan cruise before she does a year of volunteer work at an orphanage in Rwanda or when Pap buys a smaller house with an attached shop so he can restore Super Sport Chevelles?
@google_must_die2 жыл бұрын
@@wes11bravo 😂
@michaeloliver1905 Жыл бұрын
I read in that event the family has 6 months to try buy back them home or the bank owns it. It leaves nothing for inheritance.
@stevemyopinion423 Жыл бұрын
To bad. There parent need the money to pay bills.
@michaelshadley69964 жыл бұрын
Branch Davidian Acres in Waco I hear is warm all year round..
@andrewfusco85804 жыл бұрын
They even provide free music at night.
@harrydai18624 жыл бұрын
I don't know about everyone else but I enjoy the Hell out of these
@cenzogranese28824 жыл бұрын
this is nothing! if you like this, every episode of Cumia and Landau is pretty much must see!! For less than 10 bucks, try out a subscription for a month and see if you like it for the long haul. funny i have a sub, and still check out the youtube channel for stuff i may have missed!! and all the other shows are fantastic as well.. In Hot Water, East Side Dave, TBD, Mornin!!! Nightshade... too many to mention.
@mikemoore40334 жыл бұрын
Tom Selleck? More like Tom Sell-out, am I right? Anyone? I’ll get my coat.
@39Hundred4 жыл бұрын
Fawk yeah! Double guns Chippah!
@BlacKnightRising4 жыл бұрын
you'd think he has enough $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ that he wouldn't need to shill for this scam but..if there's cash to be made using a famous person will do better to scam the masses then not... I"m Tom Selleck for shiny/slippery bathroom tiles, would I ask you to install those in your home if I thought you'd slip fall and break a hip? nah.....
@shellygardner64104 жыл бұрын
If you can't produce anything, you have to steal. - every discarded actor
@poisonfists4 жыл бұрын
Will you tip my bartender for me on the way out? KIDDING! Brilliant.
@pnmwngy14 жыл бұрын
"Hello exactly!", "Oh dear lord." (car crash)
@anthonycastelluci92254 жыл бұрын
I lost it when Anthony said, "Hey Tom you piece of shit.", and I was dying pretty much the whole way through after that. Thanks for another gut laugh.
@hoyit4 жыл бұрын
I love how Anthony is always smiling. Even while he’s talking he’s smiling. Love the guy.
@MasonsFunhouse4 жыл бұрын
I always see this commercial and think how condescending he talks throughout the entire commercial. From the very first line " this isn't my first rodeo...".
@coopmurphy92164 жыл бұрын
"They told me I couldn't steal someone's home with a gun. So I used a Magnum instead"- Diabolical Reverse Mortgage CEO
@professordragoon4 жыл бұрын
I see Jim Norton and Anthony finally got back together!
@edwinchilders35172 жыл бұрын
Anthony is gorgeous 😍
@MrSammy61054 жыл бұрын
Anybody who makes Anthony laugh this much is one seriously funny dude😂 This is such a great team.
@MrSporkster4 жыл бұрын
Oh man, it is hard to see Selleck selling his soul like this.
@frankbonini91283 жыл бұрын
He's on "Blue Bloods", fer Chrissakes
@meadster3083 жыл бұрын
Best case scenario, he blew his money and is desperate for work.
@faceup510 ай бұрын
Hi, I'm Tom Selleck for Glass Shards in my Soup Restaurant
@joelgrumblatt27474 жыл бұрын
“Here at Punch Her In The Face Bedsore Farms” 😂😂😂 Landau kills me 🤣
@Old600Rusty3 жыл бұрын
"I'm Tom Selleck, for Bathtub Hair dryer"
@tobymcgroby89673 жыл бұрын
7:18 "I'm Tom Selleck for Long-Steps Basement-Laundry" Haha Dave Landau!
@Dervraka4 жыл бұрын
The only time I could see that a reverse mortgage...might...be something worth considering is if you really are completely alone and have no family or friends and realize the state is going to get everything when you die anyway. Sure then why the hell not get a check for your homes value and live it up your last few years, not like it matters at that point who gets your home when you die or get sent away to Shady Acres Retirement Home....
@garylopez37564 жыл бұрын
Yes. Exactly. It's not for everyone. I personally know some older people who have benefited from a Reverse Mortgage. The kids never visit and can care less about the parents so why not use that built up equity for a better life and who says the kids have to get anything? I had to work on my own without my parents financial help. Bottom line is: the ones who talk negative about a Reverse Mortgage are the kids who can't support themselves and depend on Mommy and Daddy for the inheritance.
@painkillerjones62322 жыл бұрын
Agreed!!! I have no family, and my friends are all doing pretty good, and have nicer homes than mine to begin with, so if I hit 65, I'm doing it!!
@MJAce85 Жыл бұрын
Something you said just made me think....since the state steals the wealth of the dead who don't have their estate in order, does the state ever incur their debts? I think I know the answer but just a thought
@Synthesizer_attic Жыл бұрын
My mother got very little money for a 800k house. My sister sold it and made 3k after paying the bank off.one statement said 10k withdrawal,8k interest and 28 k fees.wtf! Wells fargo!
@kmacadaeg74 жыл бұрын
Tom Selleck at his second rodeo “This isn’t my first rodeo.” 🤠
@arxlblacktip90853 жыл бұрын
Yeah, but he isn't riding an animal, he's a fuckin clown.
@iamthem.a.n.middleagednerd10534 жыл бұрын
My Grandmother (RIP 2012), absolutely adored Tom Selleck. She had an 8"×10" photo of him from like 1978 with that backdrop that made it look like it was his elementary school class photo on her desk in her office. She passed away silently sitting next to me in her recliner watching reruns of Magnum PI I had bought her for her birthday on DVD.
@markbaldwin98784 жыл бұрын
@DynamicRange Please shame on you,stand in the corner for 5 minutes.
@SmokeymcJoint4204 жыл бұрын
Did you realize she was dead when the distinct smell of death shit hit your nose?
@xaeroone1704 жыл бұрын
"I'm Tom Selleck for Icy Driveway Mailbox at the Curb Incorporated..."
@AJ-HawksToxicFinger4 жыл бұрын
"I'm Tom Selleck and I'm for...well I am sure as hell not for you."
@B81Mack4 жыл бұрын
It's like Angie Harmon selling Life-Lock... based on fictitious character roles the dopey public trusts.
@shidizradicchio48254 жыл бұрын
You can trust this guy. He just took out a reverse-mortgage on his mustache.
@ryanlara834 жыл бұрын
I just realized that Ant and Dave have a "Big Jay and Dan/Bonfire" type of chemistry. It's so good
@frankbonini91283 жыл бұрын
Well, He IS the NYPD Commissioner on "Blue Bloods" ...
@bulkhungry4 жыл бұрын
Hi , I'm Tom Selleck from Vic Morrow's Hat of the Month Club ...
@Bernankruptcy4 жыл бұрын
Where prices are so low you'll think you've entered the Twilight Zone!!
@bulkhungry4 жыл бұрын
Hahahahahaha !
@dcrea94162 жыл бұрын
Tom selleck has probably never had a mortgage before
@williampoole17424 жыл бұрын
"Life Call Battery Drainer" 🤣🤣🤣
@jodi284710 ай бұрын
"I'm Tom Selleck, for Elder Abuse. It's not what it sounds like. Call now for a brochure..." 😂🤣
@JohnRovere3 жыл бұрын
Tom made $200k an episode and has $45,000,000 in the bank. Wtf is he doing this?
@paulieswalnut4 жыл бұрын
Having been in and then woken up from a coma, I can tell you 1st hand, the worst part of a catheter is when they yank it out. The longer you have it in, the more your urethra heals around the tube and it actually clings to the inside of ya peckah. Worst pain I've ever felt.
@bleedingmetal Жыл бұрын
Dying. Landau and Cumia, such a great duo.
@jamespeters95227 ай бұрын
The David Spade Eagle Reverse Mortgage parody is pretty funny as well!
@chichi7754 жыл бұрын
I’m dying!! Freakin hysterical! 🤣😂
@RealElMaximo4 жыл бұрын
“I’m Tom Selleck for Acme Bathtub Toasters...”
@ALIAN184 жыл бұрын
These guys are having too much fun. I’m jealous but laughing
@WhoBeSilly4 жыл бұрын
This is comedy gold!!!!! Thanks fellas I needed that....
@pillboss19874 жыл бұрын
I’m Tom Selleck for the Buffalo Police Department.
@jskow96774 жыл бұрын
Haha wait... I'm from Buffalo. What's he have to do with Buffalo?? I'm intrigued.
@andrewfusco85804 жыл бұрын
@@jskow9677 i think pillboss was alluding to the Buffalo PD cracking that unarmed 70-year old's skull.
@ryanbarden9784 жыл бұрын
Imagine halfway through: HOLD ON! HOLD ON! HOLD ON...Mike in long island go ahead
@czarmangis4 жыл бұрын
These two are perfect together...
@EA-cx7zf4 жыл бұрын
They are both turning far leftist SJW hacks. I stayed silent as Ant took this hard leftist turn, but this is getting ridiculous. I think I even heard him attack a police officer who shot someone. Ant said something about how shooting an unarmed person is a criminal act. This guy has been around liberal dave too long. It's rotting his brain.
@czarmangis4 жыл бұрын
@@EA-cx7zf I've not seen that.. I don't subscribe though. I think they are hilarious together though.
@quinny183811 ай бұрын
Came back here since these ads are running again. LMAO!!!
@mikewhipkey68634 жыл бұрын
Tom Sellec in the woods "listen I don't want old people to be scammed out of their homes but you don't know what it's like to owe these people money!"
@WhoBeSilly4 жыл бұрын
hahahahah that was funny!!!!!
@mistarelentless57222 жыл бұрын
Lol lads all banter aside, it is absolutely messed up what Tom Selleck's doing but as someone said prior 'Elder abuse has never been more funnier, thanks Anthony Cumia'
@tdata5452 жыл бұрын
I think it's telling when you're talking about stealing homes, that you film your second commercial in a non-residential area with few to any homes, like the woods. Since that's where you'll be living.
@handyman10163 жыл бұрын
Graham Cracker Hip Replacement Surgery. LOL
@samuelruggieri21177 ай бұрын
6:13 "The borrower could be subject to foreclosure for reasons including failure to maintain the property, and to pay taxes and insurance." Yep. Sounds like a good idea to me... Sure, Tom. Join the Ed McMahon and Tom Bosley Club for the Shills.
@oldeagle25142 жыл бұрын
Selleck says "It's a loan just like any other loan, the only difference is how you pay it back." So it's not just like any other loan!!! Don't most old people leave their homes by way of death? How they gonna pay it back? Oh, the home!
@kieranhardy581 Жыл бұрын
Exactly grandma gets loads of money to go on holiday and get dicked by huge Africans, dies. Then her grandchildren have to pay her debt.
@wesleyhempoli55484 жыл бұрын
If you have no kids then reverse mortgages arent bad. My buddy's father had one too and when he died the company owned like 1/4 of the house and his 3 kids got market value for the other 75% of the home. Without the reverse mortgage he wouldnt have had enough money for his living expenses. Its not like he can go out and get a regular loan on a fixed income. Also the interest rate is actually 1.25% below prime. Its not that high of a rate
@TimEagle774 жыл бұрын
Matthew Quigley has come a long way.
@benkays38864 жыл бұрын
That movie is underrated. I'm kind of surprised to see a reference for it here
@XXthekingofyouXX4 жыл бұрын
Ben Kays - IKR. Cool movie that seems to fly under many radars.
@theplayersclub1126 Жыл бұрын
"hi im Tom Selleck for Extra Slippery Throw Rugs."
@DCSladeHouse4 жыл бұрын
You had me at “asbestos insulation”
@brentbaker44893 жыл бұрын
My mother is 94 and she would totally do this cuz she likes Tom Selleck so happy I got power of attorney
@TeddyTwoHands4 жыл бұрын
Man I love to have Anthony and jimmy again, great to have the boys back. Aka nice hair 😂
@ewerwong36244 жыл бұрын
Tony Cumia, long time my old friend
@jimdandy89964 жыл бұрын
Tom Selleck got caught stealing water from LA fire hydrants a few years ago for his orange trees. He was transporting it in water trucks. No jail time.
@jimdandy89964 жыл бұрын
@EC Tron Transfers city water to their orange trees? lol
@jimdandy89964 жыл бұрын
@EC Tron Yeah, he wasn't doing that though. Apparently his cheap ass had been stealing thousands of gallons of water over months from some hydrant in an LA neighborhood and pumping it into a water truck and the cops finally caught him in the act. It got shut up in the news pretty quickly.
@joelgrumblatt27474 жыл бұрын
“I’m Tom Selleck with Slippery Bathtubs”
@RobertBarnett-bg3gy5 ай бұрын
You guys hit the nail on the head ... what a hoot!
@AphelionImprint4 жыл бұрын
Im fucking crying laughing. I see Opie is doing well sitting in as the green screen. Glad you guys worked it out.
@ApplePie.. Жыл бұрын
Tom Selleck should be ashamed of himself.
@mullyfla4 жыл бұрын
I can't watch these when i check my email at night b/c I'm crying laughing in bed
@976charlie94 жыл бұрын
I think I just broke up with Norton and fell in love with a new man.
@hazelm10144 жыл бұрын
How about those commercials with Joe Namath for Medicaid
@andydogdixon14 жыл бұрын
I am an investor. I will probably take a reverse mortgage, not because I need the cash but because I can use it as leverage to make more money. These products do have their downside but when they’re understood they can be productive.
@hurricanehilde27444 жыл бұрын
My father did a home loan and bought 100k of stock in Royal Caribbean. he made a fortune. but you need a "strong stomach " to play.
@ApplePie.. Жыл бұрын
I'm Tom Selleck for the Memphis seniors tourism adventure. A one way ticket to downtown with all expenses included. Upon arrival you will get a gift bag full of expired Pepper Spray, Semi bullet proof vest and an overnight stay at Crosshairs hospital.
@rlenclub3 жыл бұрын
best part is that the elderly people he's joking about are all the people who used to listen to him on radio
@Detroittruckdoctor554 жыл бұрын
Man thanks ant for giving out free content. Might re subscribe to the compound
@SteVin894 жыл бұрын
That commercial reminds me of the Red Razberry Zingers subplot from Cujo.
@flaglerbob3 жыл бұрын
I miss these guys together.
@jerrodbutali39902 жыл бұрын
Didnt need Tom Selleck, my boomer parents stole my inheritances.
@dannyboysable2 жыл бұрын
LoL
@keepgrindingup76612 жыл бұрын
LOlol
@frankbonini91283 жыл бұрын
Would Actually Love to See Them Talk About the Matt McCoy Hartford Ads
@DoctorEnigma01 Жыл бұрын
Loyd Braun
@patricialinhares5041 Жыл бұрын
Sreyou
@JustinJonesFL4 жыл бұрын
I saw that guy at the grove comedy club in Arkansas not too long ago.
@hummarstraful4 жыл бұрын
Cumia ON FIRE!!! Great stuff!
@mr.smithgnrsmith78084 жыл бұрын
Use your jitterbug and call now!
@LynneRicco4 жыл бұрын
I appreciate this video SO MUCH! I have been yelling at Tom Selleck for YEARS!
@WesleyAPEX3 жыл бұрын
Dave Landow??
@tomdalton42933 жыл бұрын
Would love to see them comment on the Joe Namath Medicare Helpline ads