Rich Wilkerson Jr - Asking For A Friend: 4 Secrets Of A Secure Woman

Beauty is culturally praised but it does not equate to security. Secure individuals have an unshakable sense of who they are. Their confidence enables them to build strong connections.
During the message, “4 Secrets Of A Secure Woman,” from the collection of talks “Asking for a Friend,” Pastor Rich Wilkerson Jr. shows us four truths women should learn to lead happy and healthy relationships.
Learning from Proverbs 31 we discover a secure woman knows her worth. She holds on tightly to God's promises, which teach her to rely on her inner beauty and character. She understands external charm inevitably fades, but fearing the Lord produces beauty beyond the eye, adding peace and value to the lives of those who surround her.
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[@meadowlove822]

“She does not find security in a spouse. She finds security in a Savior!” -Went straight to my heart.

[@cesiadominguez1157]

Marissa Johnson l

[@cesiadominguez1157]

Marissa Johnson kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk

[@esthersauliga3488]

YES MAM🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽

[@acharich]

💣💣💣

[@naidaugan8087]

AMEN🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽so true.

[@Privacymode]

"You don't need every man wanting you, you just need the right man wanting you"

[@SakshiYadav-lj3ib]

Absolutely correct

[@Ngan.marianguyen]

My ex once said “you are not what I want but what I need”. Ouch it hurts. But thats why he was my ex 😢

[@p.g.2035]

@@Ngan.marianguyen sorry about that. Mine said " I would like you to be my gf one day because you won't cheat on me , that's not your nature"...very selfish ..he ghosted me after being together for 9 months, I guess because I want to wait until marriage and he doesn't.

[@Maria-ec6zq]

❤

[@lauradahl6714]

Just because someone desires you doesn’t mean they value you!!!!! Oh my gosh, WORD! This has been my life.

[@imeldaboyles9485]

Amen

[@khadesha88]

The same for me Laura! My whole entire life!

[@acharich]

🔥💎🔥

[@annecollins5885]

Outstanding message!

[@llaudelizelizabethtremotch4101]

Exactly... They just say they love you but no actions

[@nikkirowland]

“If he didn’t have to work to get you, why would he work to keep you!”” THIS!!!!!!!!! “Do not discount what God paid in full for”

[@opensecret4451]

From Hebrews chapter 3 verse 11 to chapter 4 verse 11 - the Word Rest Appears 11 Times - We are invited to enter in. I've found those who are go getters - though hopefully successful can miss a whole lot of that which they could have Freely Recieved

[@TheAniyaMarie]

AMEN 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾

[@acharich]

🤔💣

[@timinas1756]

Open Secret a

[@giftedintrovert]

That last part 👏🏾

[@naomimarc2483]

“to heal a wound you need to stop touching it”.... i felt that😭🙌

[@lisapainter7087]

Naomi Marc sameeee ❤️

[@camillefaith2005]

Yeah, but at the same time, you have to put a bandaid on it and clean it first. You have to acknowledge the wound first and come to terms with it. Then it can start to heal when you leave it alone. If you don't clean the wound it could lead to other problems/infections. Just like if you don't clean your metaphorical wounds or hardships then it leads you vulnerable to other problems down the road.

[@annafayemariebelependio9219]

This! 🥺

[@gabbywilson38]

@@camillefaith2005wow 3 years later and girl this is GOOD thank you

[@danix3262]

"When you learn how much you are worth, you will quit giving people discounts." amen 🙌🏼

[@venussolis5902]

❤❤❤❤❤

[@Jesus.SaVeS77]

Amen, No discounts. Thank God! HalleluJah!!! It makes a difference if wen a girl grows up with a Good, 💪Biological & or that typa Stepdad, & or a older brother as well. If Not, Huge Mistake. Father Daughter talks are Very important in a girls, teens life. By the time I learned that it was too late. I made a lot of mistakes in relationships & ended up with1st ❤ of my life being Physically, mentally, emotionally Abusive. Much later on in life. I also married the same time of man. Once the Physical Abuse def. Stop'd. Bcuz of short Jail time & a lot of 🙏🙏🙏 from myself,my Pastor n others interced'n for me. However, it didn't Totally Stop like I thought. After No Physical Abuse. He started tearing up, destroying things, objects, when/if angry about something, with me, himself, or others, etc. After that the Emotional & mental abuse started, got Worse & worse. I found out thru counseling sessions that I/he was codependant. Later, even Worse, that I was married to a Narcissist, soul ties in affect as well. Hidden abuse is just as bad as Physical abuse, Bcuz much harder for other's 2 👀 & Identify. No1 can 👀 & harder to Prove that abuse is happening. Sorry, but I cud wrote a book, but Still Too Painful right about now. God 👀 & knows & that's where my Help comes from. God, Jesus, God's Holy Spirit & holy angels of the Lord as well. If Not, I would've been dead awhile ago. So, If any Woman: Christian married, single, dating or not, Younger, middle aged or older women reads this message & You are in a Physically, Emotionally, Mentally Abusive Relationship, or U have a Spouse, Boyfriend that is a Narc.>Narcissis, or shows any type of Narcissistic behavior. PLEASE, PLEASE Get Help ASAP. Bcuz it's Hard to get away from, out of that type of Marriage, old or new Relationship. Especially if that Woman/those Women Do Not realize what is going on with that man & or a Woman that's like that with her boyfriend or Husband as well. May God Bless U & Keep U all Safe...In Jesus Mighty Name, amen.

[@werdacommunityprojectproje9194]

I will put this on my status...

[@annecollins5885]

Whoa! There ya go!!

[@giftedintrovert]

Yea thats the problem with this world, people don't love themselves,

[@tracyfrimpong1947]

"don't submit to any man who wants authority but won't couple it with responsibility" wow🔥🔥🔥

[@thebostonbunchthebostonbun9386]

Amen

[@thebostonbunchthebostonbun9386]

You will always be as sick as your secrets wow

[@margaretwanjiru2781]

I know, right?

[@tabithawatts3561]

Just wow!

[@einel18]

"Eve was not taken from Adam's feet because women are not beneath men. Eve was not taken from Adam's head because women are not above men. But rather Eve was taken from his side because women and men are suppose to walk side by side in partnership, fulfilling the mission God is giving them." Amen to this. ❤

[@zamanyembe5467]

einel18 Amen!

[@Dannybrooklyn1]

Boom! Love it!

[@churchofgodmanipurhaobamma7527]

Wow it's really indeed very true and each one of us must remember this...

[@TheAniyaMarie]

Amen ❤️ A WORD 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾👏🏾

[@Jesus.SaVeS77]

Some men Only wanna/want 2 Remember the Submissive part of a woman. Hwever, Bible says: Husbands n Wives submit 1 to another. Hmmmm! I've given that Peticuliar Scripture sooo Many times. Whew!

[@rachellim5218]

4 Secrets of A Secure Woman 1. Demand increases where supply decreases. (Learn your worth and value in God, quit criticism and self-loathe More confidence, fewer insecurities). 2. When you add value, you become valuable. (Bring words of wisdom instead of gossip) 3. Worrying is betting against God. 4. Beauty is fleeting , Jesus is lasting.

[@kamp7898]

Why did this sermon take my wig off my head and slap me with it 😭 It was so GOOD 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

[@MissDaR81]

Hahahaha! Oh, thank you for that. 😄

[@sophialaurenceman]

HAHAHAHA 😂😂😂

[@nakisanijacobs7647]

Not slap you with it chile😂

[@jernahmaeglori3466]

"We need a generation that rises up that isn't obsessed with their self-image, but we'd become obsess with their JESUS-image. GET OVER YOURSELF!"

[@acharich]

🔥🙏🏾🔥

[@evagulavi4662]

PREEEAAACH! love this!

[@christined.butcher6498]

I was literally praying this morning for Jesus to help me grow to become the woman HE wants me to be in this season, and then BAM, this message appears. So timely and needed. Thank you so much for posting.

[@minhthuynguyen423]

Christine D. Butcher 🥺❤️ sameeee

[@moma5232]

I have prayed 5 minutes ago about my insecurities. Then I bumped into this video

[@barbarasanchez8249]

I listen to this sermon everyday and everyday gets easier to love myself. Thank you !

[@dashelledisna6239]

Yes, Beauty!!

[@SakshiYadav-lj3ib]

You are so cute, sister

[@lizethmartinez-soltero5440]

Mmmm I love this for you & I should adopt this concept 😊

[@danal.6372]

Just because someone desires you, doesn't mean they deserve you

[@Jesus.SaVeS77]

Gdm. D Lee Thnx. I'm gna definitely have 2 Remember this. This is True before, during & After a marriage. Def. Check that out while dating. I wish I would've caught that, knew all this info. B4 hand. It may have Saved me from a lot of hearaches, etc.

[@NatalineJ]

Let me pause this for a moment. At only 11 minutes and he is tearing this thing up!!!!! Submit to husbandddddd not the fling, not the boyfriend, not the best friend.

[@MonaLisa2495]

"You have been hidden so that you could be found!" 💎 #KnowyourWorth#

[@chelleyignacio5131]

"Do not discount to what God paid in full for.."

[@jademondia6537]

"A lot of women are dealing with daddy issues. They've been looking for love in the WRONG places so that they can get someone to fill that void, but they can't find it. You may not have an earthly dad, but you have a great Heavenly Father." 🙌🏽 Growing up with a dad who believes in "tough love," this brought me to tears. 😥💙 Thank you for this message, Pastor Rich.

[@lexie02jones25]

I totally get you.

[@centena316]

Jade Mondia your earthly dad may be mentally unstable but our Heavenly Father isn’t.

[@acharich]

🔥🙏🏾🔥

[@Harlem55]

Um- Sorry, but that is total Bullshit.

[@Tina-us1tr]

You can have a dad that’s involved and still have insecurities and issues with men

[@misskat7437]

"The soundtrack to a secure woman is laughter." Through every hardship and circumstance I'm always laughing and cracking jokes. It gets exhausting being consumed with worry when we aren't in control. I may or may not receive an earthly husband, but laughter is forever, just like my Jesus is forever.

[@wanjiramuthoni3091]

"Insecurity is loud confidence is quiet " "You don't have to prove your worth your worth will prove you " You don't need every man wanting you. You need the right man to want you " When you learn how much your worth you will quit giving ppl discounts " Just because you are an asset doesn't mean you are appreciating " "To heal a wound you need to stop touching it ".Whew🙌 Jesus take the wheel

[@acharich]

💥🔥💥🔥💥

[@xmochix604]

As a married woman of 15 years, I can attest to what pastor is saying. Make the guy work!

[@skym821]

🥺🥺🥺

[@esmeraldaromero6988]

Same 🙃

[@KatErina-ii6ru]

How ?? Can you give me an example?

[@kingkri7]

My goooooodnesssss! What a video to watch after a break up. This makes me want to write a new identity statement. I AM SECURE IN HIM!

[@krystaltomasson5636]

Yes mam!

[@maryquinn365]

“Worrying is betting against God”👏🏽

[@hannahb3575]

... I read this comment, and then he said it in the video.

[@lafemme8]

@@hannahb3575 Same here. We're being spirit led.

[@brimarie32]

God's been preparing me for marriage in this season. I realized a couple of weeks ago that the best thing I can do for my husband is to make sure that I am secure. And then this video popped up. He's an on time God.

[@AbbyEmbro]

I love this. I'm so insecure right now. I've been dying for a man to build me up and care for me emotionally. But I know that will only be a bandaid. I need soul deep security in Jesus Christ because He is the only One who can make me secure. I highly reccomend Beth Moore's book "so long insecurity." Very helpful on this journey to eternal security.

[@moma5232]

Amen

[@sethunyaleepo6650]

"Just because he desires you doesn't mean he values you" wow

[@aubreyexum240]

“When you learn how much you are worth, you will quite giving people discounts.” THAT. IS. GOOD. 🤭🤭🤭

[@ditebogomolwagae9721]

"A lot of men want authority but they don't want to couple it with responsibility" Whoaaaah that hit me!!!

[@hannahb3575]

Teachings in this 49 minute video are lessons God has taught me over 2 years. This church is going to be big

[@skym821]

I like your message :) There are creepy men at church though. (That will pursue you) Church is the only place I've received unwanted attention (words and touch) from men 3 times older than me. 😔🤢 Do not let any man be in your space if you are uncomfortable. Period. Wish I learned that sooner.

[@nataliasolakian6717]

She does not find security in a spouse, she finds her security in a Savior. Amen!!!

[@NatalineJ]

Yes! A gift to friends, siblings, coworkers, and parents!!!! Often we long for relationships but forget to steward over the ones we are currently blessed with!

[@NathalieLazo]

Incredible person reading this, you have everything there is to succeed in life, whatever that is for you. Go after the life you truly want NOW! ✨ I believe in you! Love - Nat ❤️

[@magolescheers]

THIS IS THE MESSAGE THAT I NEEDED BUT DIDN’T EVEN KNOW IT THANK YOU JESUS

[@derriciawalters3548]

Also, some women, on top of finding a boy to replace the man (dad) she never had, try to become the very “man” she never had

[@acharich]

🎯🎯🎯

[@pilarlozano9630]

This Word brings so much healing to womens hearts... so much truth and compassion... awesome to see a man be a man and preach like that...

[@sandradrille5360]

"If he didn't work to get u why will he work to keep u"this word touched me😭Gods word is all that matters

[@nhr9320]

This word was “Everything”. I’m done with certain behaviors and men who latch on to these behaviors

[@DomaniqueStorm]

I am a member of Transformation Nation but I have to say this right here is one of my ABSOLUTE FAVORITE SERMONS OF ALL TIME! This is so POWERFUL!!!! LOVE THIS!

[@lorenadecasas9785]

I’m a single mom raising 5 boys. 🙏🏼🙌🏼♥️

[@Souljaofpeace]

I like how this sermon came full circle. From how woman and man were created for each other. . To how God fearing women deserve praise. Thanks !

[@amandalopez2040]

This about to make me cry I feel all of these things. One day God will bless me with my dreams and if a man comes he comes. well this did make me cry.

[@monquebankston]

That was AMAZING!! I just scheduled a watch party with all my girlfriends so they can see this too! Definitely a must see for all ♥️♥️ Touched me in so many ways

[@Joelle__K]

This. I needed this. Over the past 2 years I've been so focused on my trials that I slowly started to lower my standards as a result of losing sight of my true value in Christ. I'm grateful for this. Thank you so much Pastor Rich. 🙏🏽🙏🏽❤️

[@mrs.gonzalez-diaz3714]

Please keep up these good sermons that are bible-based!! 🙏🏼🙏🏼 Many churches these days provide more motivational speeches than Bible-based preaching.

[@Isabelizzo1028]

Every girl needs to hear this message!

[@constance4065]

Isabel Hicks I Agree!!!!

[@vanessamae_carpio]

Always come back to this message every time I feel insecure and fearful♥️Thank you so much God for Pastor Rich's life🦋♥️

[@mikki4155]

I was feeling very down, shame thinking no one would ever like me. Then this popped up on my KZbin and now my mind is put straight. I think I'll be replaying this instead of my music list for a very long while until it goes into my head and until I start living like a secure woman of God! Thankyou pastor! Your sermon is full of wisdom!

[@AngelaSmith-di2uw]

1)CONFIDENCE WITH IN. 2) SHE, SHINES BRIGHT. 3)WHOLENESS OF 4)INDEPENDENCE IS STRONG BALANCE

[@faithfullylala4858]

This man had me in tears laughing so much 😂😂😂 he has a great spirit ❤️

[@laripakasohtun9562]

I came here twice because i really need to make myself stronger than my past "she is clothed with strength and dignity,and she laughs without fear of the future" Amen🙏🙏

[@yazmin8842]

“Worry is faith in reverse”😔🙌🙏

[@mariamendez4459]

Wow just wow!!! I’m 41, and have been married almost 17 years. Wish I had heard this sermon at 25! 💯

[@miamoew01]

o m g so correct. break up makes me understand when insecure happens , I always do men's jobs which completely change our relationship. its no longer his job to find me and be with me, its me be with him all the time.. 🙄️ what a ridiculous me

[@brendajeanette3335]

This was God speaking to me. Afraid of the future and settling for less than what I deserve. Thank you God.

[@tumisodiphofe6373]

There is no fast track to character.🙌🏾 Carry a spirit of excellence.🔥

[@shannel5851]

“Just because someone desires you, they value you.” 🔥🔥

[@bettieb7933]

Wow 👏 So you feel as if you've been hidden?! You were meant to be discovered! Amazing Message 👏

[@user-kx2vw8xe5h]

Love what he is saying, but I would like him to do a secrets of a secure man

[@mimirizaldo2412]

I already watched this for like 3times already, i must be insecure and weak. But I know God is faithful ❤️❤️

[@AestheticAthletics]

Such a timely word. I needed this so much!

[@LR-jl3sv]

So many words of wisdom in this. I loved the part about how some of our anxieties come from past wounds and that they key to healing those wounds is forgiveness. It made me realise I hadn’t truly forgiven someone but I have now handed that over to God. Sometimes we just want to hold onto the hurt, I don’t know why. Thank you Lord 🙌🏼

[@constance4065]

Lauren R I resonated with what you said. I was DEEPLY SCARRED & hurt by someone I was with for 12 yrs, off & on which I truly believe is a Narcissist. I’ve tried & tried to forgive him for all the heartache he’s put me through & to a certain extent, still does because for some reason I cannot stop talking to him even though I’ve not been with him physically..I’ve become physically disabled from all the stress I was under for those 12 yrs. I read in your comment where you turned over to God someone you hadn’t forgiven. I really need to do that!! It’s probably the only way I will ever be able to forgive him so I can try to work on getting my health back, hopefully it’s not too late. Thank you for your comment!💞

[@michelledavids6416]

Thank you for reminding me of my value. It's easy over many years to forget ... impactful message .. keep it coming Pastor....

[@lesyanisgarcia3896]

I miss my church so much, I left Miami a year ago and there is no pastor like him! Bless his church and his family!

[@dontplaywithgod2064]

You just made 2 decades of chains fall away. Thank you ❤

[@swylie830]

"You'll always be as sick as your secrets. "😳

[@kellydionne7404]

So glad God lead me to this video. Going through a lot of healing at this time. Thank you for this sermon !!!

[@judiebee2000]

Me too hey. Be strong Sis and stay connected to the word of God

[@irmaaguirre3953]

1st time I heard him preach and WOW!

[@boitumelomakobosheane2928]

2 years later going through a break up and this word is affirming me and I know it is not by chance that I came across this video

[@susanebertz3749]

As a 55 yr old single never married, this is the best message Ive heard a preacher preach, they don't preach enough for single ppl. So thank-you Pastor Rich 🙏🙏🙏

[@andreavascot]

I’m literally listening to this message again Ssoooooo POWERFUL need to be reminded of this EVERYDAY🙏🏼

[@tammietickell7860]

Please put this in book form!!! I have been married for 37 years and still learned so much through this sermon. Would love to do this for a small group. So needed!

[@thewaitingroomco]

Can we get a follow up on what it looks like to make him work to get you?

[@NicoleDawley]

Slay Shleee that part!

[@alittledisciple4606]

You don't. 🤷‍♀️ Let em take the first step

[@AngelaSmith-di2uw]

Proverbs 31:8:Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves, for the rights of all who are destitute. Amen 🙏

[@rashedaburnett4028]

Omg!🙊that was soo encouraging!🙌🙏🏾😍That young man was preaching do u hear me! PERIODT!!!!!🔥🔥🔥

[@abovetheblack]

I am 11 minutes and 10 seconds on and this needs to be viral, like yesterday!

[@nataliasolakian6717]

Our presence is a PRESENT. You are a GIFT to your coworkers, family and husband! In JESUS' NAME, AMEN!!!! 🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🕊💕💞💖🎉💓💗💛🥳🎊🌟

[@AngelaSmith-di2uw]

7 Years Peace In Christ _God Has a Plan for This Beautiful 58 Year Old Purified and Clesened through the Holy Spirit 🙏 Amen Haleluia Praise God 👏 In The Mighty Holy Name of Jesus Amen

[@shadae071586]

Went to church on Sunday and loved it so much I had to hear it again. Such a great word.

[@margaretwanjiru2781]

Stop giving discounts to what Jesus paid in full Every time I watch this sermon I learn something new

[@DeboeStudios]

This was amazing! Thank you for publicising this!!

[@libbyengland1990]

Sooooo good 🙌🏻 just what I needed to hear!!!

[@stay1790]

Basic question "Would you submit to you?"

[@TISHAINNISREALESTATE]

The narrative that you tell yourself will be the life that you live! 🙈 He’s coming for my whole life in this message!!

[@ayotomiakinmukomi93]

This message blessed me

[@CeceDeAnn]

I needed this

[@abbynicolas8766]

So goood!!!! Hallelujah

[@tchelmuth]

We are not defined by our mistakes but by the grace of God! I needed to hear that!

[@Roose_ar]

I needed this!

[@Blanimausi]

Just needed to hear this message thank you Pastor!!!

[@rosemarymazebo5168]

Wow what a message ❤️💪🏾 this came at the right time.

[@marissaali2312]

I really needed this🔥Made me realize a lot✨God bless you

[@candiceearley2859]

PREACH IT, PASTOR.

[@5bacio]

Yes Rich! Preach!!!!!!!

[@gustavomaranzati5485]

Watching from 🇦🇺 This word was 4Reaal

[@janiced6926]

🙏

[@abbybradshawtv]

Came with that heat from the beginning!!! Let’s go!!

[@mayajohnson7172]

Amen! I needed to hear this sermon.

[@MsLetty25]

It's not about having a goal because a goal always have a finish line but instead in a relationship you need to have a growth mindset👌

[@b.simmons2351]

Needed this🙌🏽

[@kristinakader1940]

I ALWAYS LEARN SO MUCH FROM YOU. Thank you 💐

[@fabiolachavarria4030]

Oh thank you for this word!! 🙌