Why KRAMER VS. KRAMER (1979) Is Realistic - A Video Essay

In this week's video, we delve into Robert Benton's 1979 masterpiece, KRAMER VS. KRAMER starring Dustin Hoffman and Meryl Streep.
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FEATURED MUSIC:
Silent Partner - SUNDAY DRIVE
• Sunday Drive - Silent ...
KRAMER VS. KRAMER Soundtrack - Released 1980
CBS Records International
FEATURING FOOTAGE FROM:
KRAMER VS. KRAMER (1979)
"We're gonna be terrific..."
I do not own any footage in this video, the film Kramer Vs. Kramer is property of Columbia Pictures/Sony Pictures. This video is intended for educational purposes.

[@SnackMuay]

Dustin Hoffman is such and underrated actor. It's not like people think he's mediocre, he just rarely gets mentioned with the greats of that era of Hollywood.

[@RobyFN2169dtf]

TheWizardOfOsborne totally agreed. While De Niro and Pacino are great in their own right, Hoffman is up there

[@josuebenvindo]

Here, in Brazil, he is one of the most respected.

[@Overlorddz]

He's not really underrated though right? I mean in recent decades he took it kinda easier maybe, but he has some very classic and esteemed roles under his belt.

[@whysoserious652]

nah, he aint underrated, fuck mainstreams. ppl who are into movies knows who dustin hoffman is, and he received 7 Oscars nominations with 2 Wins (both Best actor)...and yeah he's 1 of the GOAT.

[@wesleychang2005]

This is from Wikipedia Hoffman has been widely reported to have harassed Streep during the making of the movie, and the two had a contentious working relationship.[5][9] In a 1979 Time magazine interview, Streep claimed that Hoffman groped her breast on their first meeting.[10] When Streep advocated portraying Joanna as more sympathetic and vulnerable than she was written, she received pushback from Hoffman.[5] Such was his commitment to method acting,[11] he would hurl insults and obscenities at Streep, taunt her with the name of her recently deceased fiancé, John Cazale, claiming it was designed to draw a better performance from her.[12] He famously shattered a wine glass against the wall without telling her (although he did inform the cameraman beforehand), sending glass shards into her hair. Her response was: "Next time you do that, I'd appreciate you letting me know."[5] Hoffman slapped her hard without warning while filming a scene, she said in 2018: "This was my first movie, and it was my first take in my first movie, and he just slapped me. And you see it in the movie. It was overstepping."[13]

[@MannalEldin-dl1xv]

Being a mom is very important and vital. People underestimate the role. I'm glad that the boy went to him

[@GenX_Catholic]

Phenomenal movie. On a societal level, it's a shame that we have devalued what it means to be a homemaker/caregiver/child raiser to a point of almost meaninglessness, and that only true value can be found outside the home and family structure. Whether it be a man or woman, that role of care giver is critical, and should be praised rather than demeaned.

[@GenX_Catholic]

@@aditigupta9930 it’s funny. In the five years since I made this comment, my views on this have changed slightly. I would remove my sentence about whether it be a man or a woman as I have become convinced that humans are hardwired by God to assume roles that play to the strengths of each sex. Women are natural caregivers, and seem to find more joy when accepting their roles rather than raging against them.

[@noushs8004]

Not all women, some of us are too independent to stay home and be the house slave

[@GenX_Catholic]

@@noushs8004 yeah. That “too independent” mode is called luciferianism. That attitude allows for the continued fall of humanity, as those like you worship liberty over goodness. May you one day be free from that independence that is holding back your natural and healthy roles.

[@amanekabbaj]

Just a small thing, it probably has no meaning but the fact that it begins and ends with Johanna going in the lift has nice symmetry.

[@thegraysonzelik]

True! I think it could be symbolic in a way, as she goes down the elevator to leave her son and husband in the beginning but at the end is going up to see her son again

[@evilzzzability]

Thank you. This is, in my book, a perfect movie.. you can't change anything that would improve it. A movie that stays with you for the rest of your life.

[@drunkengamer8342]

To me it doesnt feel like the mother wanted to be a mother to begin with. If she cared more about the child she would have been there for the child during the divorce and not just leaving them. And at the ending it described that; she wanted a new life more than she wanted a son. It didnt feel like an ultimate sacrifice, rather than thinking what she wanted the most. She rebuilt her life with someone else while she wasnt with her son. That to me proves my first point. Thats how it felt to me and what i got out from that film when i watched it. Other than that the rest of the analysis was on point

[@akashimaou5115]

This was a really good video. I watched the movie with my dad when I was small but I didn't understand it at that time, after watching this video I fell like I need to fly to his place as soon as possible and say Thanks for everything he's done for me.

[@MannalEldin-dl1xv]

Oh my goodness. Dustin Hoffman is the best actor ever. Today and yesterday.

[@jccummins8173]

Hey, well done your video on neighbours was eye opening and made me rewatch that movie

[@RobyFN2169dtf]

Did you dig it?

[@elliotmomand6857]

This channel is scandalously underrated. I recently subscribed and this content is all a dream come true. I thank you, and anticipate a large influx of audience, as is inevitable with truly good work.

[@RobyFN2169dtf]

Elliot Momand Thank you so much! We've been growing recently (5,000+ subs in under a week!) so hopefully that bigger audience is coming soon

[@OWlsfordshire]

It's realistic until the ending. Most people that are so narcissistic and self focused like the mother have a way of justifying their actions to themselves in almost every situation. EXTREMELY unlikely that she would give up custody after winning. It highlights what a lot of fathers had to go through during the custody battle, but that's just the beginning. The reality is most fathers were lucky to even just get every other weekend like he was offered in the movie. He would be dealing with this the rest of his life.

[@christarride]

100% true. No love from the courts if you have a set of nuts between your legs.

[@nattyps3160]

I think both were troubled. When the child was old enough to be in school ted as she said refused her to work stating she wouldn't make enough to pay a babysitter. Funny she made more than him. I know he was fired & took a pay cut b/c he was both parents but she made fast what he took 15 yrs to make b4 he was fired. What actually annoyed me was Joanna wound up bullied again when she got therapy a great job paid & won custody but her old bff now Ted's who blew w/ the wind even taking her loser husband back attacked her in court when she encouraged her to leave !!! Then ted went right back to bullying her . Ok maybe instead of saying " I want my son " which I think was part of her standing up for herself should have said " can I start seeing billy again " I think she knew ted would say no in any event. We saw him flip out over his lawyer forcing him to give her a freaking afternoon. He supposedly grew but tried to call her a nutcase b/c she had a therapist. Even his lawyer was like so what is she talking to walls? Ted was a bully her ex bff admitted he was n9n existestent to his son for Years ok he stepped up but this woman was suicidal! Some wacko tale the poor kid with them out the window. In their 8 years he & sh3 admitted h3 was absentee selfish & assigned her one role she stays home ( when she had a great education & talent) he the king of the castle the bread winner the end. He didn't even listen after she said like 5x I'm leaving u!!! He even grabbed her bag & she was so desperate she left w/ only her clothes her pocketbook & the 2k she kept as she brought it into the marriage. So ted got a break 9n alimony & no divorce lawyer. Yes he stepped up for his son for 18 months. Maybe if he were a better husband & dad she wouldn't have been that d3sperate. Whats sad is both were creative people probably why they fell in love but it's OK she wanted an outlet besides sitting home w/ her son who was already in school. I see both sides. I felt Joanna just got bullied again & ted won. Ugh

[@LukeLovesRose]

That's a lot of women today unfortunately. They can't put themselves 2nd for more than 5 minutes before controlling everyone, before only thinking about their own feelings in the situation

[@IntuitionVE]

Just recently, I found your channel and fell in love with your video essays. Keep up the good work :-)

[@RobyFN2169dtf]

Thanks, bud!

[@AlternativelyBananas]

Just watched kramer v kramer on a lark because it was referenced in bobs burgers. This was an incredible journey and I’m glad you made this review. Strong commentary, thanks!

[@marcusosborne6123]

I feel like the fact that Joanna lets Ted keep their kid undermines the realism. In real life the "good guy" doesn't always win. Even if Joanna knew Ted was a better parent, she probably would've taken their kid anyway because of the social construct that a mom should be the one to raise her child, or just out of spite. My original comment was going to be: "this is my favorite movie I've never seen" Because 1) Roby does a great job with the video and 2) when it is stated that Ted loses the custody battle, it felt like a perfectly realistic ending. I was disappointed that Ted got to keep the kid, because it felt too Hollywood. Maybe I'm just too pessimistic. Edit: I'm a child of divorce btw.

[@RobyFN2169dtf]

Hey, films are interpreted in different ways! I'm glad you enjoyed the video, and I understand your perspective. I still dig the film, tho.

[@varunshivnani6444]

Totally agree - an ending that Marriage Story barely improves on by giving us muddled middle-of-the-road conclusion.

[@msairs]

you're being real to what you know. i agree. my sis in laws going after my brother money, and i think to spite and milk him.

[@chapterblaq]

i haven't seen the movie (yet) but maybe she let him have the kid was deep down some women think "a boy needs his father" regardless of whether he's a good one or not and I'm not saying i agree with that sentiment.

[@nickmathis7539]

@@varunshivnani6444 On top of that, "Marriage Story" emphasizes that the legal procedures of divorce are so messy that the lawyers rewrote the narrative of their own marriage. They may not be in love with each other anymore, but the messages that Charlie and Nicole wrote one another is the real truth to their marriage. They will always be a part in one another's lives and spirits, even if they are no longer able to connect with one another. The film is not about winners and losers, but rather how no party ever truly wins in a divorce.

[@markkm94]

I love this movie. I love this video. Killer work, man!

[@RobyFN2169dtf]

Always nice to meet another fan of Kramer Vs. Kramer

[@josephst.george7841]

It was incredibly realistic until the very last scene. I’m okay with this though, as I was very happy with the ending as an audience member

[@jordanpaige3649]

Hi I never comment but I am obsessed with your videos I think you have amazing insight into these films and I love the way you end your videos hahah also I can't believe you're so young I literally thought u were like 30 (I mean that in the best way)

[@RobyFN2169dtf]

Jordan thank you very much! That's much appreciated (the age part)

[@nickdorenkamp959]

Even though I haven't seen this movie but one thing I love about the moment with the french toast is how the tight space of that kitchen; and the openess of the other rooms in the apartment show where the relationship between the characters are at. One question I love asking myself when I watch movies is what am I being told about the characters relationship visually without dialogue?. While on the subject of movies about Divorce, one movie that comes to my mind is the Squid in the Whale and around the start of that movie there's a shot of the kids sitting together and shot of the parents sitting on opposite ends of the couch. Its a small detail that tells so much.

[@alexsanders8266]

Great analysis and editing. Keep going! I really dig it!

[@GameplayerSid1994]

This is the only movie that made me cry. I watched it only today

[@DubiousConsumption]

You're doing a good job, man. I've been meaning to rewatch this movie . . . This is going to put me in a certain place and time . . . the first time I watched this, I rented it based off the name Kramer vs Kramer. I was just a kid and thought that Kramer was the same character from Seinfeld. I was such a huge fan of the quirky neighbor that I rented it without looking at what it was actually about. It was too much for a kid to watch, much less realizing that it was something separate entirely. I couldn't get into it or finish it. But now having gone through that aspect of my life, it's probably time for me to rewatch it. Keep it up man, you've got this down.

[@dejaalston8672]

Kramer vs. Kramer is one of the greatest american black comedy legal drama movies of all time. The story, perfomance's, music, images, direction, and cinematography was outstanding and incredible. It also gives a insightful and articulate representation of the psychology and fallout of divorce and touches upon prevailing or emerging social issues such as gender roles, women's rights, father's right, work-life balance, single parents, loss, love, survival, and emotional reasonance. Dustin Hoffman, Meryl Streep, and Justin Henry did a outstanding and incredible job. They all put emotion and depth into their roles. It was decent. To this day I still wacth it and I consider it a classic. 😍😎💯👍

[@orion8835]

Kramer vs. Kramer is a tear jerker film. The scenes are very “realistic” and well acted. The mind boggling plot leaves the viewer confused until Streep’s return at the end. People actually do these types of walk outs. Men, women. Many people just are afraid of completion, duty and just feel trapped by everything. The child actors anguish scenes were gut wrenching to watch. Young children before 12 are scarred for life when divorce occurs. Especially when it appears a safe marriage. Parents social morés were changing radically in the 1970’s to what eventually became by the 1980’s. Some were traditional and made the sacrifices. Others decided to divorce/separate and leave everything behind. The film dives into autonomy versus the oppression of one party to another. The role reversal of gender was powerful in this film and let the way to many more films in that vein. The device of a wife who died, divorced, abandoned the unit , Pretty in Pink, Mr Mom, Three men and a baby, Mrs Doubtfire. And subsequently a few television shows Gimmie a break, Silver Spoons, The Hogans. There was also a slew of these types that didn’t last long on TV: Me and Maxx, I’m a big girl now, Ladies man, Shannon, Father Murphy, Star of the family...Etc . Most of those just lasted a few seasons or even 1. If that. What remains clear is that AFTER K vs.K this became a huge genre.

[@AlanObrien-if4ie]

Wen Joanne at the end ask how she looks and he say terrific her smile is one like the mona lisa

[@deannebaldwin5656]

One of the best films ever made! It certainly shows that what mothers deal with on a daily basis ain't a walk in the park...

[@JakobSpruce]

Excellent video!

[@RobyFN2169dtf]

I'm so glad you enjoyed it, dude!

[@kino_verite]

Interesting analysis mate, I might check the film out.

[@ramyakathal3872]

tears.

[@TheMrTomahawkk]

There's nothing like waking up to one of your videos.

[@RobyFN2169dtf]

Matt Dorusak awww

[@Overlorddz]

I am so happy that movies were my one true fascination throughout my whole childhood. From West Side Story, to Titanic, to Kramer vs Kramer, to Bullet. Would just rewatch it every day. So thankful I was allowed and introduced to so many masterpiece films and my parents weren't difficult about age rates or certain hours of the day. Actually I recall one of my friends around age 6 not being allowed to watch anything except between 4 and 5. Let alone anything other than Winnie the Pooh or something. I thought his parents were such losers.

[@ryanalexh]

GREAT ANALYSIS, GREAT VIDEO, GREAT MOVIE

[@tipanca10]

Hey man, you should do a Pain and Gain video

[@RobyFN2169dtf]

Blank Very interesting, might have to think about that!

[@Flarex2466]

This film looks really interesting are there any similar pieces you might suggest?

[@RobyFN2169dtf]

Joe Lunnon Marc Webb recently directed Gifted with Chris Evans, definitely recommend that

[@helloitsokay]

Great video! One bit of constructive criticism: You often cite an example from the film by saying "[x] character states..." and then followed by a clip of the film. This is fine, but personally when you do it a lot it kind of breaks up the flow of the video, sometimes I just want to hear you talk and keep giving me interesting analysis! So maybe once in a while it'd keep the video flowing more smoothly if you simply quoted the line yourself over the clip? Just an idea. Keep up the good work!

[@RobyFN2169dtf]

Thanks for the feedback, dude!

[@KatrinaH200900]

How do you get the footage from the actual movies for these? I love your channel ... Thank you for all of your videos :)

[@paoloyanes534]

Great job

[@RobyFN2169dtf]

Cheers, bud!

[@jennifertimlin1371]

The movie starts with the elevator and ends with elevator. People miss that. This movie allows Ted to learn and grow throughout. He and Billy both learn how to deal with what has happened. I don't see it as a sacrifice. She was selfish and she knew she was at the point where she wanted her life to be more about her than the kid.

[@NoName-jq7tj]

Robert Benton directed this film after rewriting Mario Puzo’s original script for Superman.

[@markanderson769]

Divorce " is not just that a marriage dies but a heart , hope and faith that life can go on dies along with it . It is an eye opening moment of what kind of person and parent you are when reality hits .

[@Al88633]

The movie was made in 1979. The charector Johanna in the movie was suffering from REJECTION and hence all that happens in the movie. This is the reality with a lot of people in the world today because this is a generational problem that gets passed on to subsequent generations, and that is one of the main reasons why the institution of marriage is collapsing globally. 43 years since the movie was made, this reality, the source of this problem and it's solution is not figured out by global society. How tragic.

[@LukeLovesRose]

Yeah but she didn't communicate that with Ted

[@richardlee2120]

The film's reference to legal matters in family law court is not realistic. Maybe the family laws were much different in 1979, but most films that featured legal matters were just inaccurate. Probably the most realistic part of the film is that women typically get custody of minor children.

[@taiyeef]

terrific!!

[@h2oman678]

Love your videos!

[@yarkovskaya]

Don't you think that at the end, when he told her he'll wait downstairs, he just left his son and his home to his ex-wife in order to let the boy stay at home with his mom? He could have come up with her and wait outside the apartment.

[@josuebenvindo]

In my view, he was trying to bring her back and restore the entire family. She reacts well when he says she looks terrific.

[@yarkovskaya]

@@josuebenvindo nope, for several reasons. First of all, it goes against the whole story and what they have achieved during this difficult period of life. This wife-husband relationship can't be restored. She said in the court that she is seeing someone, so she's obviously over it. He started to see other people too. And why then he would wait downstairs? It makes no sense at all. Everyone likes compliments. It's not important that she was pleased to hear that but it was important for him to say so. He loved her before, he loves his son, so he let them be together at home without him.

[@evelynschvemler3112]

​@@yarkovskaya i've surfed the whole internet to find someone who also came up with this theory and finally i found it😂.

[@communistrat2945]

Do Stand By Me

[@cruddddddddddddddd]

I think this film is great. So well-acted and -directed. Well-written. Fleishman Is In Trouble is an even more disturbed version of the divorce-due-to-the-wife-wants-success and what-happens-to-the-kids-now story tropes, in large part due to the fact that the story attempts to paint the sacrificing father out to be some kind of insensitive jerk by the end, and the career chasing wife is some kind of a victim (both husband and wife have a career in this one, both are successful, but the wife wants even greater success). In Kramer, the writers tell us, 'there are no winners in divorce'. I think there's a lot of truth to that (depending on the situation). However, in Fleishman, the writers try to tell us, 'there are no good guys in divorce', which I don't buy for one second. It's interesting to me to compare the two, just to see how much our ideals have moved in 40-ish years since the former was made.

[@moinschatz777]

And nowadays a woman has to be a woman, sexobject, wife, mother, homemaker, provider and after this MAYBE got their own identity. And men still don’t have to control their emotions, participate as equals in a relationship and a care work, household etc. 50 years later it’s mostly the same nowadays.

[@whysoserious652]

Everything in this movie is realistic expect the climax..great analysis..

[@Liam-iz1tc]

You are fantastic@iamthatroby

[@fuberlin1]

good one :)

[@BlenderDumbass]

Lucky guy... Most women today would take the kid to get money

[@deannebaldwin5656]

Typical male attitude! Most men today wouldn't be seen for dust and leave the woman to get on with it🤬