Ron Swanson: Father of the Year | Parks and Recreation | Comedy Bites

[@ComedyBites]

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[@Colayith]

Ron's dead stare with bloodshot eyes as he says "There is no quiet anymore. There is only Doc McStuffins" is beautiful.

[@0g0dn0]

When my cousin was a baby/toddler, his thing was Barney. I had to suffer through that. He’s a father himself now. I am satisfied knowing he shares my pain.

[@0g0dn0]

And more I just heard #3 is on the way. Good for him.

[@steelgear3876]

Ever since my son was born these scenes have a whole new meaning to me.

[@mmcdonn1]

He delivered that line perfectly. So funny.

[@5h3nn0ng]

Blame Ann for letting the kids play with her medical tools

[@elosougui5264]

Andy is the adopted son Ron never knew he had, but needed in his life.

[@italatin18]

He has a son, John (middle name redacted) Swanson.

[@burginewells6100]

@@italatin18 That is a very Swanson response

[@valentin7693]

April would be that tho, andy is pretty dumb to be Ron's son lol

[@LBBKPHILLY]

Ron was the best step dad to Andy that isn't with Andy's mom Tammy anymore, but they are still connected.

[@Stonedasfcowboy2003]

Too bad, Ron does have a son and his name is "John" not Andy

[@lt.reubenrozeyt5716]

Andrew: "Oh Ron cool baby." He is so chill🤣

[@tracylazzarotto5068]

Baby*

[@naomilamont3277]

And Ron appreciates that chill response "Thank you Andrew"

[@zrtl8774]

Said the same thing to my friend. He and me have beers every other day

[@iamsethhasting8911]

Sounds like me when I saw my first, second, and third nephew.

[@c63w204W]

Just what Ron wanted

[@vitaemins4527]

as funny as it sounds, ron is such a natural romantic. if my husband was out on a walk and came back to me and said "i found the perfect tree for our baby's crib. i will build it, meticulously over the next few months with my own two hands".. let me tell you that sounds like one of the most romantic things in the world.

[@ninabina8]

I agreeee .. if my husband did that, I would want him to put ANOTHER baby in me tbfh

[@PDuggs]

if you can find it, nick offerman's standup "american ham" is fantastic!

[@AlexBadger]

Agreed, it has a rugged yet touching primal quality to it.

[@matheussanthiago9685]

​@@PDuggs "the first taste of a cold beer after a hard day of work tastes like the jeez of the lord almighty himself" That line stook with me

[@sandflame5811]

My gran do that for my granma, after he need to do 3 more

[@killereria9945]

Ron will never openly admit it but you can tell he genuinely loves the girls being 100% obsessed with him and when andy’s around and being a kid with them he’s definitely confused but happy.

[@WarriorofCathar]

Its hilarious how much he loves them and Diane, but at the same time he's still Ron Swanson and therefore the desperate chugging of Lagavulin 16 after a whole day with the kids.

[@stacyhamilton2619]

I disingenuously disagree and demur.

[@aleandra3945]

ron: **fixing things while explaining** his baby: -👄-

[@harrisonthecarguy3734]

He's a good listener

[@davidtheepicone]

@@harrisonthecarguy3734 Like all Swansons. One of the best listening bloodlines in all of America.

[@0g0dn0]

This is the correct procedure when one has a baby. Who cares if they don’t understand? Someday they will.

[@Ancaryvan]

😐 The Baby is sedated during the filming 🎥.

[@velco941]

@@Ancaryvan I believe sir that your information is bollok

[@harmonicajay91]

I love that Ron Swanson's entire character arc this series was becoming more and more open with his emotions after what could be considered a psychologically traumatic life. He was raised by a lunatic survivalist, was groomed by and married the woman who helped deliver him (Who also had the same name as his mom), and married a crazy psychobitch who brought out the worst in him (And had the same name as his first wife and his mom). I'd like to believe that all this pretty much closed him off from people and it was Leslie and the Parks Department that helped him come out of his shell. Then he started hanging out with Andy (The adopted son he never knew he had) and because of that he met Diane and her kids and actually had a healthy and meaningful relationship that was good for him. He became a father to her daughters and to their son. Him fully admitting that he loved Diane is such a sweet moment that shows how much she and the girls changed him. Ron still kept his core values in the end, but he also learned to compromise and bend. The ending where he takes a job in the Federal Government as leader of a National Park and tells a bunch of strangers his FULL NAME is the climax of his story. He's learned to open himself up and to let people in. It's one reason why I love this series. The characters truly grew as people.

[@fourleafclover2064]

Excellent analysis

[@oneleafaday348]

This hits different, in a way, after watching episode 3 of The Last of Us

[@TK-7193]

@@oneleafaday348 that man must be distantly related to ron swanson.

[@Jason-qg1gx]

U writing a book?

[@TK-7193]

@@guyincognito8440 to destroy them from the inside.

[@him050]

“My son is several weeks old, he is quite familiar with the sound of power tools.” I love that line too much!

[@yomama5368]

ron testing the crib by hitting it with his truck and then the camera showing us the dent is underrated

[@MrJesusrosario]

I thought that was the funniest thing in the whole video.

[@Khontis]

I know people who do stuff like that, though more for carriers and car seats. Drop them down a large stairwell or have someone throw it out the back of a truck going 40mph. Yea it has the seat secured and stuff in an accident but you'll find the weakest spots quickly.

[@nightlynoctotv]

"There's more than one crib tree in a forest. That's not a lesson, just a comment on lumber availability." Ron Swanson has so many golden lines.

[@snsmystic]

Love it! I'm glad tParks and rec ended before 20202, he'd be sad to see the state of lumber availability this year, 2021.

[@SLocoKnight]

@@snsmystic How are things in the distant future of 20202? Do we finally have flying cars?

[@ironshield2154]

@@SLocoKnight There is no flying cars, only Doc McStuffins

[@etlarm5514]

@@ironshield2154 based response

[@Countdownsmiles]

Bruh that "property of pawnee government" onesie could've gotten Jerry killed

[@ZbJeeBies]

ron spiked it into the trash and it took all i had to keep it together 😂

[@buttonsfan]

Honestly a onesie that says “Property of _____” just seems gross.

[@kellynolen498]

@@buttonsfan i mean you could swing it as property of heaven implying that the babies your little angel but it still would be tacky

[@buttonsfan]

@@kellynolen498 okay that one seems okay. However if it’s something like “property of a lucky parent,” still seems pretty scummy

[@ausnahmenwerfer5570]

@@kellynolen498 "Property of heaven" sounds like dead.

[@EnycmaPie]

Andy is Ron's 30+ year old son who he still needs to bring to the dentist.

[@Delightfully_Witchy]

I don't think Andy was supposed to be 30+ at the time. I think he was supposed to be early-mid 20s, if I'm not mistaken. Otherwise it would be "eyebrow raising", but not exactly scandalous, that he's dating late teens/early 20s April.

[@stvk99]

@@Delightfully_Witchy Andy was 29 and April was 21 when they started dating. it was confirmed in the episode when Tom told him about the "half your age +7" rule about dating younger girls.

[@levipeterken4020]

@@Delightfully_Witchy Eh it's not much of a difference. Plenty of 50 year olds dat mid 30 year olds

[@chickenisindeedmystyle7316]

That’s different, since both are well into their adulthood imo

[@ironwraith852]

@Halloween All Year Round y’know, Andy did tell Ron that he was experimented on by the government because he had a big head as a baby. Prolly not true, or related to why he is the way he is, but it’s interesting.

[@wet0wl]

Ron treating John like a full grown adult is the best thing ever.

[@rainmanslim4611]

Andy: "hey Ron, cool baby!" Ron: "thank you andrew" I love that little exchange

[@nickkuiper32]

Like he is talking about new shoes🤣

[@anthonyblocker97]

It’s simple and to-the-point, just the way Ron prefers conversation 🤣

[@edsonpacheco294]

I like to think that, that was Ron's favorite complement

[@crimson1427]

It's my favorite

[@Richard__Cranium]

It's my go to line the first time I meet a friend's kid/baby.

[@globbyakaweirdjellyguy954]

I don’t blame Leslie for freaking out over there being a baby in Ron’s office, especially given how much she loves to celebrate moments like this.😉😂

[@CadySharpe]

I’m pretty sure that’s the reason he didn’t tell her

[@dash4800]

@@CadySharpe that and it's also nobody's business.

[@alexanderhussussian5653]

Leslie needs to lay out of everyone’s business

[@nickthedrawer]

Why would she need to know about that?

[@MikeMJPMUNCH]

"There is no quiet anymore. There is only Doc McStuffins." an updated version of this would be "There is no quiet anymore. There is only Baby Shark."

[@mattcoyle1620]

I feel Ron would tolerate Doc McStuffin more than Baby Shark. Doc McStuffin, while doctor-esque, does do maintenance (albeit to toys). Baby Shark is simply demonic choirs to him.

[@Sarah-yz5ne]

@@mattcoyle1620 demonic choirs to everyone

[@izzyme989]

More like Cocomelon

[@Peanut_Von_Strudel]

There is only Paw Patrol or Pa Pa Cho as my Nephew likes to call it.

[@logandysico957]

Or Fancy Nancy

[@zohaibhaider]

Ron is the real hero of this series, he doesnt judge people on who they are, dont force them to do things he wants, doesnt force his beliefs on others, strongly willed and principled. always there to help his coworkers and friends, great dad and husband. A great positive male role model for others to follow.

[@laughingsnake1989]

I mean Ron is a libertarian after all lol

[@dylansickinger545]

I wouldn’t say he totally doesn’t force his beliefs on people but other than that I agree

[@avalasialove]

Except for that episode when he tried to convince an elementary school girl that the government was out to get her when she was supposed to write a report on why government matters.

[@employee962]

@@avalasialove well she asked what he thought of local government and he obliged

[@avalasialove]

@@employee962 Fair enough. Besides, it was pretty funny.

[@Lily-gh4lv]

I love that when Leslie calls everyone in Ron looks super stressed out like everyone’s going to ask him questions and annoy him now, Andy just says cool baby Ron 😂 the dude who gets most excited by everything knows Ron well enough to keep his cool and be respectful, I love that small detail

[@Palemagpie]

Can we all acknowledge that the only woman who could tame Ron was freaking Xena warrior princess. And that it the the appropriate response.

[@RonJohn63]

I'm sure the casting director had that in mind.

[@anastasiaweatherspoon6111]

i know right. anyone who is anyone should know who Lucy Lawless is even i know who she is. Lucy is amazing.

[@Storytime4now6767]

It took a cylon

[@fenixchief7]

It could literally only be a woman named Lucy "Lawless"

[@stevenmcnabb9185]

"There is no quiet anymore; there is only Doc McStuffins." As a father of three I can fully attest to this.

[@datartisttho1987]

9:10 I love how John looks up at Ron like he understands everything, like “Yes. Intriguing, father.”

[@bartoszdulas1703]

What I love about this scene when Xena invites Ron to trick'or treating is that she barely holds herself not to laugh at Chris Pratt being Chris Pratt

[@Horzinicla]

You said it yourself. People hate openly religious celebrities, it isn't cool to believe in something to them

[@demonking86420]

@Tara Allen and what's another bad icing on the already terrible cake is that the group who argue with those religious comments that you say are "much worse"; they're also very extreme. And it's always a bad recipe when two opposing extremes clash, both sides just further take it as proof they're in the right direction. Ron's monologue really fits well. "What religion am I? I'm a practicing 'None of your f***ing business'."

[@skyfalldeadpool1633]

I love that you called her Xena bahahaha

[@anastasiaweatherspoon6111]

i noticed that 2.

[@bartoszdulas1703]

@@skyfalldeadpool1633 she'll always be Xena. She was one of my first crushes as a kid. Next to Princess Leia.

[@kisermooney7165]

I want to see Dwight put Ron's crib through the durability test 😄

[@saravg235]

This needs to be made ASAP!

[@joeljustin]

A crossover we surely need!

[@earl4810]

Never knew I needed to see this till now lmao

[@rhett1029]

“I like Dwight”

[@reno145]

"Am I interrupting something important?" "Impossible. I work for the Government." A greater truth has never been told.

[@fireflyeclipse]

I like to think Ron doesn’t have fish and that he asked for fish food to mess with Leslie/throw out inaccurate information to throw everyone off the scent

[@suziequzie]

Very insightful observation, Janis.

[@ChonoRock1198]

@@suziequzie this comment is goated

[@AidanTheCross]

​@@ChonoRock1198 Indeed so Fredrick

[@arm279145]

Ron’s crib did that level of damage to what appears to be a 1977ish ford f-series pickup, and emerged unscathed. I fully believe that crib would protect from missiles.

[@cruelreality7497]

Only Ron can build missle proof cribs

[@JeffreyGoddin]

You may be approximately correct, but for some reason, whenever I attempt to guess the date of manufacture for a pickup truck, it turns out to be 5-10 years older...

[@arm279145]

@@JeffreyGoddin IMcDb says it’s a ‘78.

[@owenlewis6399]

“Weighed multiple pounds and several ounces”

[@0g0dn0]

He was born… some time ago.

[@CaLypSO4456]

“John-middle name redacted-Swanson”

[@RBAWintrow]

Technically correct. The best kind of correct!

[@sophistanonym1703]

Only idiots measure people in length. We will measure his "height" as soon as he is able to stand of his own volition.

[@VampirusX]

The perfect man! Has always everything under control, a handyman, father of the year... and sort of romantic!

[@benediktjostingmeier4519]

I love how andy‘s reaction is so great for ron

[@muratkahraman8743]

As Ron saod before "This office is full of woman and that includes the man but Andy is someone I can appreciate"

[@PimpLenin]

I loved it when he said the world is full of assholes. That’s pretty much what I told my son. “The world is full of assholes. It doesn’t mean you have to be one.”

[@CaLypSO4456]

Prob the first thing I’ll tell to my kid if I ever have one. It’s the honest truth really.

[@radfatdaddy4169]

Can confirm. Have told both my boys that same exact thing.

[@hotdamndan9892]

Leslie is probably the only person in the world who knows Ron more than anyone else, and even her was surprised by Ron having a pet fish. 😂

[@Ducsuper]

She know his birthday!

[@TheSchmandarinOrange]

I’m so glad that Ron paid for Mario’s education

[@0g0dn0]

He paid for Star Lord’s education. There is no Mario here.

[@thesheto8962]

He payed for Emmet’s education

[@JSmellerM]

He clearly paid for Bright's education.

[@christstwin6606]

...garfield

[@0g0dn0]

Ooh, unless Ron were to play Mario instead. Not the ideal choice, maybe, but he’d make a lot more sense than Pratt.

[@Chronohome]

0:03 Anyone notice that Ron's computer desktop completely empty, EXCEPT for the recycle bin? A callback and a character trait rolled into one! I love this show.

[@ellnats]

so far i dont think we ever see John Swanson cry, he's a Swan-Son

[@MarnieGolde7]

If anything, he deserves a Swan Song for it.

[@TheVoxbox13]

Badum tish

[@boga-tier6609]

I will always think that Andy is canonically the godfather of Rons' son and canonically the adoptive son of Ron. He is the other half that Ron isn't but in a good way. He is more emotional and wild, while Ron is stern and calm. But the two make a good "partnership" that isn't toxic or bad, just wholesome.

[@a_literal_brick]

"Whoa Ron! Cool baby!" Probably the only response he appreciated

[@Bergen98]

3:15 - Ron's older kid playing with his younger daughters, how beautiful!

[@ericmojave6061]

“That’s why I love Moby Duck. No fufú symbolism. Just a tale about a man who hates an animal.”

[@JaqenHghar.]

The giant white duck

[@Nutsaur]

One of the few times Ron is so very wrong.

[@0g0dn0]

@@Nutsaur It’s not that he got it wrong, it’s that this is all he got out of it.

[@RonJohn63]

@@0g0dn0 that's all any Real Man needs to get out of it.

[@yoshpeters3079]

@@Nutsaur not wrong he is spot on it’s about a man that hates an animal and it’s about a fish.

[@raine420]

4:13 ah, nice to hear Dutch’s voice again🥰

[@Stupidhaole808]

HE HAD A PLAN TO FIX THAT RADIATOR! Mangoes

[@palindrome2599]

HAVE FAITH, RON.

[@PorkBafat]

First they fix the floor , next they go to Tahiti

[@thecabin3995]

Ron with the whisky after the kids is the most dad thing I’ve ever seen

[@mattcap11]

There is no quiet anymore. There is only Doc McStuffins.

[@lovecraftbaby]

andy's "oh ron, cool baby" is my favorite line i say it to all my friends with babies lmao

[@TheCConnoll1]

Love Ron having his baby (plus the fish) in secret. I always saw it as a silent revenge/F you to Leslie for learning his birthday all those years ago and trying to plan all the special events in his life since.

[@riverrojas2036]

I love how Diane's girls gained a big little brother: Andy, Ron's adopted son, haha

[@rezin9714]

“Oh Ron, cool baby” “Thank you Andrew.” Amazing lines

[@dayschange2]

I would have loved more scenes of Ron with this children, but of course that would be too much personal info for Ron to willingly share.

[@thecashier2]

That little look Ron gives when he's refilling his glass with booze is priceless 5:12

[@vanesalodico7798]

I lovethe thumpnail, showing Ron's proud smile while holding his son.

[@Heatstruct]

The way I see it, Ron has a adult daughter in April, a son in law in Andy, two child daughters and a infant son and a grandchild. All in all a pretty rounded family

[@Boggeddown_]

seeing Dutch Van Der Lind walking around with a clipboard was something i didnt know I needed ( 4:13 )

[@TheRealCC3]

I have a plan, John.

[@jinxiejae]

"Remember, most people in this world are assholes." He's not wrong.

[@theblackheart5727]

My Dad is a sweet, comedic version of Ron Swanson. No nonsense, extremely handy, and very firm in his beliefs. Now, I’m a good man and so is my 20+ year old son. We had an excellent example. Every young man deserves what me and my son received. Good day to you all.

[@ScorpionStrike7]

Andy playing with the girls like an older brother is so wholesome

[@cthulhu9136]

Dude Ron is the perfect father to Andy and April Little does Diane know she adopted them as well in the marriage

[@the_priest_of_holy_moon_cult]

It's moments like these that make me miss my dad

[@the_priest_of_holy_moon_cult]

@@liteknight thanks dude but not necessary came to cope with it years ago just gonna keep on going trying my best to be good person

[@keithearley1734]

We all need our dads. The most influential, but underrated servants on the planet.

[@mantaship]

"My son is several weeks old. ...He is very familiar with the sound of power tools."

[@Manny4356]

Lol, when Jerry brought in that “Property of Pawnee Government” outfit for the baby. 😳😳😳

[@guythat779]

Andy is too precious "hey Ron cool baby"

[@BoredInAfrica]

Ron swanson and uncle iroh in the same film would give us all the life lessons needed

[@WereDictionary]

3:10 I love this scene because Andy is the best wingman. Yet again.

[@sjferguson]

Ron Swanson with a baby is the sweetest thing ever ❤

[@BlackLasher]

That drink after the kids are gone. I felt that.

[@jeremytung1632]

We need more Ron Swanson’s in this world.

[@lady_spacesis]

Ron so begrudgingly saying "come on John" to a baby was the one that got me

[@liamnevilleviolist1809]

6:52 Chris prattles on about very meaningful parenting tips, whilst Ron simply blows off some useless sawdust from a dowel of pine ahahaha. I don't know if this was intentional, but it was brilliant to watch and see for myself as both a part-time babysitter and part-time carpenter!

[@oojumaflip1]

We all need a Dad like Ron

[@photofreak56]

My dad was in alot of ways like Ron. He was much more liberal but in many ways his actions, and adituted are simular. My dad worked for the local state government though instead of trying to defund it he tried to get more funding and was a life long union orgizer and steward at his work. Dad also liked to make things. Dad wasn't always sure how to be a dad but much like Ron did everything he could to be a good one. He took an interest in me. He made time for me and we see that Ron does that with the girls. he doesn't always understand the why or how but loves them. I also really like that theirs never this feeling of the girls being "step kids" to Ron they are just his kids. You can tell that Ron loves them as much as he loves his own bio son. Which is a rare thing when it comes to TV

[@finleyhearon2510]

Diane: How were they, really? Ron, covered in stickers and getting his loafers painted red: Couldn't have been better

[@Marah_Newton]

2:57 I love Andy! ❤️😂

[@LatIenws]

7:10 😂😂😂I absolutely love this face of aha moment

[@kalaharigold4290]

Ron is discretion goals!😂😂😂

[@N0B0DYC4RE]

"I approached the tree and murdered it."😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😭😭🤣 And now my coworker think I'm crazy

[@FarmerJAB]

Underrated line

[@kalvin187douglas]

2:37 Diane: “Hey am I interrupting something important?” Ron: “Impossible. I work for the government.”

[@naknoll]

Ron Swanson, a man who can do more then Dutch's whole crew combined. Probably knows how to farm mangoes too

[@mirokovachevich5648]

I mean...when the guy in the camp who puts so much money into the money box significantly than literally everyone else and is one of Dutch’s most loyal person in the camp gets chastised for every time he complains even once. Let’s be honest, it’s not much of a compliment when Dutch Vanderlin And Micah Bell are in charge

[@chrisput1024]

One of the GREATEST characters in the history of Televison.

[@churlish7851]

I have become fond of Ron. Hes my favorite character ever.

[@samu-yx8zv]

Oh Ron, cool baby!

[@TheStormybob]

Thank you, Andrew

[@lt.reubenrozeyt5716]

@@TheStormybob Everyone I would like to introduce everyone my son, Jon [MIDDLE NAME REDACTED] Swanson

[@KasbashPlays]

9:31 - How could you splotch your logo over that proud dad smile Ron was sporting?

[@aloomey]

Literally just said this out loud

[@isabellalam08]

Ron has 5 children, ivy, zoey, john, april and andy

[@thewin9459]

Is it weird that I don't have a kid, but I somehow understand Ron's pain when his co-workers are surrounded/obsessed with his baby?

[@fuqueroji]

4:12 Ron could definitely fight gravity at this point.

[@katherinefrost6318]

He's never been one for sticking to plans.

[@SP-cp3qu]

the speech to Chris is so wholesome haha!

[@asclark832]

Everyone going to glaze over Dutch doing work on a government building? He must have a plan!

[@joefoshoyo]

Arthur, we’re gonna grow mangoes in the pawnee city hall and turn it into Tahiti

[@yetigonecrazy]

I had to scroll way too far to find this, the first Dutch comment. Bless you man of culture

[@KingMasey]

“Arthur my boy, not a minute sooner, it is good to see you.” “Hey-“ “How are you doing Arthur?” “We’ll now that you mention it, I don’t feel too good Dutch, we need more muneh.” “That’s right, don’t worry Arthur, I know just as well as you do we need money, and the fact of the matter is I’ve got the plan for the perfect score.” “Oh yeah? What’s that?” “Third Floor, Pawnee Indiana’s City Hall? We’ll disguise ourselves as noble kind, Workers, I’ll be the foreman and you and Micah are my crew.” “Micah?! Shouldn’t we bring… I don’t know… someone who suits the… unusual finesse for a builder?” “Micah’s perfect, we even practised lines earlier, the point is we’ve got this Arthur, all we have to worry about is that blunt tool, Macklin, and maybe a loose eye. But I promise you, we have got this.” “Hell… yeah, I ain’t got much to lose…” “Plus, extra loot. Micah scoped out the parks and recreation department, some computers that we can take for ourselves and sell to some offshore hackers, none of our business.” “Uhh right…” “Alright, I’ll gather my things you go get Micah, and son…” “What…” “How strong is your power tool…” “Huh?” “It needs to be powered up for this one.” “What the hell are you talking about Dutch.” “Arthur! Look, down, at your crotch… are you gay Arthur?” “it’s… it’s just the way I’m standing.”

[@1rotzy]

"Oh. Ron, cool baby." "Thank you Andrew. I made him myself. "

[@codynovak8259]

It's perfectly safe. I tested it by hitting it with my truck. Crib: not a scratch Truck: right side completely fucked up. Lmao

[@nyogtheeldritchgentleman]

7:04 I need that sign.

[@kreigguardsman3355]

Ron Swanson is the kinda Dad I want to be.

[@HEAVYDIAPER]

4:25 The big dude with the beard is Dutch Van Der Linde from the Red Dead games!

[@NeedlessExposition]

I love how this compilation shows Ron being a dad not only to his biological son but to his stepdaughters, Andy, April, and even Chris.

[@eminakbas9190]

haha this was great i really enjoyed it what a humongous laugh!

[@TheEnergybeam]

8:29 That hits different in 2021

[@mememan7025]

Dutch van der Linde vs Ron Swanson. Truly an epic matchup.

[@sebastianmartellisr.3587]

During my Childhood, I had no Father besides seeing Bruce Willis in Die Hard, we need more John McClane's and Ron Swanson's

[@jessythomas5865]

Jake Peralta! Is that you?

[@Purellified]

John [REDACTED] Swanson

[@grunt7917]

5:05 Girls: *happy about playing with Ron again* Ron: *DROWNING HIMSELF IN ALCOHOL* 🤣

[@ophelias4172]

I love how much Ron likes being a dad.

[@rhysoverbeck5251]

4:14 is also known as Dutch Van Der Linde for those of us keeping score at home

Tahiti

[@KingMasey]

“Arthur my boy, not a minute sooner, it is good to see you.” “Hey-“ “How are you doing Arthur?” “We’ll now that you mention it, I don’t feel too good Dutch, we need more muneh.” “That’s right, don’t worry Arthur, I know just as well as you do we need money, and the fact of the matter is I’ve got the plan for the perfect score.” “Oh yeah? What’s that?” “Third Floor, Pawnee Indiana’s City Hall? We’ll disguise ourselves as noble kind, Workers, I’ll be the foreman and you and Micah are my crew.” “Micah?! Shouldn’t we bring… I don’t know… someone who suits the… unusual finesse for a builder?” “Micah’s perfect, we even practised lines earlier, the point is we’ve got this Arthur, all we have to worry about is that blunt tool, Macklin, and maybe a loose eye. But I promise you, we have got this.” “Hell… yeah, I ain’t got much to lose…” “Plus, extra loot. Micah scoped out the parks and recreation department, some computers that we can take for ourselves and sell to some offshore hackers, none of our business.” “Uhh right…” “Alright, I’ll gather my things you go get Micah, and son…” “What…” “How strong is your power tool…” “Huh?” “It needs to be powered up for this one.” “What the hell are you talking about Dutch.” “Arthur! Look, down, at your crotch… are you gay Arthur?” “it’s… it’s just the way I’m standing.”

[@jacksongibbs8998]

Ron slam dunking Jerry’s onesie made me spit out my drink.

[@OneofInfinity.]

Every time Ron opens his mouth gold comes out.

[@RyGuyTheStrong]

"Oh, Ron. Cool baby!" "Thank you Andrew."