What SCREAMS "I Have A Crush On You" ?

[@sethrougeau6860]

Truly, the Roger and Elaine story is the perfect example of the difference between guys and girls

[@ayleth891]

I'm a girl that thinks like Roger

[@Murasaki019]

​@@ayleth891You need a boy that thinks like Elaine then 😂

[@NamelessZeros]

Perfectly balanced as all things should be @@Murasaki019

[@yharon8243]

I'm a boy who thinks likes like elaine

[@maestrulgamer9695]

Horse

[@Sznchester]

Roger and Elaine’s story was a masterpiece.

[@Fonyikopo]

I have never heard a story that represents the truth better

[@tntanimations4201]

The whole time I was asking myself "is Roger me?" Roger is so relatable

[@evanbarrow2477]

perhaps one of the funniest reddit stories ive ever heard. i laughed so hard so many times

[@max_garcia]

@@tntanimations4201 ikr? girl was having an existential crisis over their relationship and the dude was like "aw man... not the car maintenance again!"

[@Cheeseman66]

Dude this Reddit story should be a Netflix show

[@lancjosh340]

The Elaine and Roger thing was just like a little romance novel in itself.

[@A-Clear_View]

15th like

[@Leo_the_duck]

@@A-Clear_Viewok?

[@recsito5730]

Goddamitt I need a full novel about Roger and Elaine. There was just so many questions in the end. What is Roger gonna do? Are they gonna end up together? Will Elaine decide to give it a try? Wich Czechoslovakian won that tennis match? DID ELAINE ACTUALLY EVER OWNED A HORSE? WILL ROGER FIX HIS CAR? WHO THE HECK IS NORM?

[@layzdoode8174]

wtf happened to Roger's car? did he get it fixed? why the cliff hanger wtf

[@deep1012]

I know right??!!

[@FastnOut]

It probably exploded

[@potatogirlcultist19]

Unfortunately, Roger chose to drive our brand of car, so just 11 days after he asked whether she ever owned a horse, Roger sadly died after the engine exploded and a valve flew into his open mouth, chocked and died.

[@haydenwoodyard3624]

@@potatogirlcultist19 Nah that’s his cousin Bodger you’re talking about. The transmission in Rodger’s car is fine, but he did have to get a new grill. He was driving one day, and a turkey ran in front off him and got it’s head stuck in the grill.

[@billylionisnotagoat]

oh! is that why he got a horse?

[@condude2464]

The "unless they tell you directly, it's not obvious" isn't always true. it's easy for a man who is told that someone is into him to overthink, by thinking, "Is it true? Did they mistake me for someone? Is it a prank?"

[@max_garcia]

exactly.... you never know if a woman is into you... she could be butt ass naked for you and you could think "does she like me or only use me for sex?"

[@viktormarkuslindemann5073]

True

[@northernalpine4350]

kinda sad that even with direct confessions, some guys just think its a sick prank.

[@jorienwachukwu466]

@@northernalpine4350 Especially with guys who are considered "unpopular" or "unattractive".

[@profound_najamo]

a girl shows alot of these signs but i still doubt even though she tried to make me touch her breast( i didnt)

[@Countcomfortable]

Women will never understand the sheer lengths men go to to deny that the person likes them, like, they could literally let you be railing them and we’d be like “She’s just being Nice”

[@kungyangyang4256]

nah she's just trying to comfort me as a friend

[@iamnobody350]

For real. If a girl said she likes me the first thought that would come to mind is "is she playing a prank" or "as a friend"

[@MrEthos]

shout out to Roger, hope he got that transmission fixed

[@mordechai-]

Story 8 had me cracking up with laughter. Very good!

[@kokopellione]

it was very true lol

[@FastnOut]

It's so comical

[@Hell-Blaster]

Ellaine: basically in a mental war Roger: why do they charge me so much just to lie

[@turtlesandmoreturtles]

This is also Roger's policy regarding world hunger.

[@megalord2141]

The Roger and Elaine story sounds like something straight out of death note

[@FunnyAcolyteExplains]

What screams, " I have a crush on you"? Me. To every girl I see

[@Grace-kq1wv]

😂😂 well played,dude, well played

[@PhantomFlameYT]

straight to the point lmao

[@tuckerg2292]

Let me tell you women, us guys see y’all’s hints but most of the time never take them because one of two things could happen. Either A: we take the hint into consideration and make advances and it works out fine. Or B: we take the hint into consideration and make advances but it ends up it’s a false hint and now not only is our relationship awkward, but if the women feels to do so rumors could spread making our life miserable and embarrassing. I hope this explains things better to you women out there👍

[@DummyTummy5545]

And C: making hints and expecting him to come along. If he doesn't, then spread rumors about him and try very hard to destroy his life, or if he does, then drag the relationship so much while sleeping with the guy next door

[@TheOnlyT0asty]

And D: most of our self esteem are so low that we can't believe a women would actually like us, so we assume it's a sick joke.

[@TheLiamster]

Back in 2017, I was in secondary school (year 10) when a girl confessed that she loved me but I couldn’t pluck up the courage to ask her out. I won’t name this person but I had a massive crush on her ever since I met her in year 4. She was outgoing, kind, caring and attractive but above all else she was really nice to me and that meant a lot to me. She had been giving me hints for about a year up until that point (winking at me, blushing, complimenting me, and even making the shape of a heart with her hands) but I hadn’t picked up on any of them. Despite knowing her for a long time, I never had the faintest idea she felt this way about me, we were more or less only on a first name basis and I never saw her outside of school. We only ever exchanged a few words with each other and that was only when we’d bump into each other in the corridor or shared the same class. I knew she was sincere about her feelings otherwise she wouldn’t have said it. I have autism and I find communication challenging so it would have been difficult for me to even start a conversation. The truth was that I was scared of being loved in a romantic way as it was something I’d never experienced before. By the time I got to year 11, life was hard for me and I was dealing with anxiety, being bullied everyday and struggling with revision for exams. I ended up having a mental breakdown which forced me to leave school at 16 without doing any GCSEs. The last time I saw my crush was 2019 and that point it was already too late for me to do anything about it. I know I’m a coward and I should have just gone for it since she obviously would have said yes. The single biggest regret of my life is not anything that I’ve done but rather what I didn’t do and what I should have done. I wish I had the courage to have spoken to her, I feel like we could have an amazing relationship together and my heart aches just thinking about it now. I still remember the day it happened like it was last week and I’ll never forget it. I’m only now beginning to come to terms with it now after seeing a therapist and taking medication for my depression but I don’t think I’ll be able ever get over it. Thank you to whoever managed to read this long story about my sad love life. I’m sorry for writing the lengthy paragraph and I’ve probably repeated myself several times. I’ve been wanting to get this off chest for a long time and I just decided to do it today. I’d appreciate it if someone could leave a positive message or cheer me up in some way. I suppose the moral of this story is, if someone says that they love you then you should tell or better yet show them how you feel

[@ohmy4599]

LITERALLY THE SAME THING HAPPENED TO ME (except for me it was year 4 to 8 and then she left the school) I am so glad that I am not the only one who screwed up like this!!! thanks for sharing, i feel much less lonely now😂😂

[@PhnxKap]

Bro fumbled so hard

[@sinistarz0253]

It is okay bro... do not feel bad. I was also diagnosed in the spectrum and I know how it feels. It is never too late for love.

[@RomeoBlueMK.1]

My friend who was in 6th class had already gotten this to happen to him like 3-4 times while I was just there, watching it all happen knowing I would be lonely for a few more years. Just a few more. (i’m in 4th year right now and i’m so f-ing lonely)

[@SamuelRatcliff-j6i]

I am also on the spectrum, and though I haven’t experienced this myself, I can tell that it would suck for you. If you were to see her again and she was still interested in you, would you go go it now?

[@coltenbrown]

What screams "i have a crush on you"? I wouldn't know im still single

[@jaiydentillman6406]

Real

[@sixgamer-gh6kg]

Sad

[@coltenbrown]

​@@sixgamer-gh6kg at least I'm honest about it

[@sixgamer-gh6kg]

@@coltenbrown me to

[@sixgamer-gh6kg]

@@coltenbrown me to

[@Kakusiu]

The guy from story 8 really did bring back Czechoslovakia

[@cunningsmile4166]

Simply put. This is anything anyone can notice basically. If they are always nice to you and love your company. ....i never did. Childhood friend had a crush on me but i was too dense to notice. We've both moved on in our lives, but i did apologize for my prior obliviousness to be kind.

[@digitalphoenix72]

Dave Barry is a hilarious writer. "Roger and Elaine" is just a tiny snippet of how funny he is

[@ryanlopez4626]

Story 8 basically sums up everything

[@Creepy-cat]

0:41 story 6 is the best one

[@anderstermansen130]

thank you Rufus Reads, for telling me about experiences that wont happen to me in my current life time.

[@venti2569]

12:45 💀💀 "How to tell if someone wants to be murdered: they keep begging for their life and are crying uncontrollably pleading for you to not kill them"

[@EnemyToad]

I love Dave Barry. If you liked story 8 google him and read some of his other stuff. He’s a humor columnist from like the 80s to earth 00s so he’s got a ton of shortform really funny stuff.

[@OmegaShanic]

Messing with their own hair - this applies for guys as well as girls, though it is mostly girls. This act is called preening, and it's done because they both care about how they look in front of you, you make them nervous they don't look right in front of you, and they will do something even out of nervous habit directly in front of you because they aren't thinking about that, they're thinking about YOU. It's so second nature and instinctive animals do it.

[@DummyTummy5545]

​@@Techischannel girl the world doesn't revolve around you

[@Bjornson77]

I can confirm that, like in story eight, men do go on those mental loop-the-loops, and don't have the slightest clue what's going on

[@he-man9160]

You can tell if a girl likes you on the position of her anckles I died laughing

[@f-man3274]

0:15 the WORST ending: mom dies, girl dies of laughter, man dies because he is depressed

[@aragocz727]

How old is that thread bro, Czechoslovakia's been gone for 3 decades

[@GrosvnerMcaffrey]

Sometimes I call it that. Other times i forget Yugoslavia no longer exists

[@olafgurke4699]

He also said it was a recording.

[@DummyTummy5545]

What is that word meaning man

[@conallirvine04tusifrirotsitrue]

Mate I overheard my teacher talking about Czechoslovakias upcoming football match and the entire day I was just thinking And SHE teaches me

[@smurfaccount9269]

Going to resurrect this: He was quoting a book allegedly, so that book is the older source.

[@trich742]

When they go out of their way to talk to or interact with you. When they talk about you to their friends or family members When they think about you while your apart or buy things for you based off stuff you've talked about.

[@stephenvance4867]

Story 8 (Roger and Elaine) is the definition of the difference between men and women.

[@Home_here]

5:56 elains story ends

[@carnonPL]

I feel like story 8 is exacly what is happening every time couple has conversation female: thinking about every scenario, what she did, whai could happend and predicting many futures like in chess male: yeah, it will take a while... I haven't played with my boys for a while, maybe I should messege them on discord when I come back home to play some games

[@Crazael]

6:37 I have absolutely no idea what that smile looks like and I'm pretty sure I never made it myself.

[@FastnOut]

It's just a regular happy smile

[@thesheerwoodcrow5465]

So what happened to Rodger’s car?

[@kokopellione]

Let's hope he got the transmission checked out doesn't sound good

[@haydenwoodyard3624]

Good news the transmission is fine, bad news Rodger had to get a new grill for his car. A turkey ran into it and got its head stuck in it.

[@JALA578]

Story 26. You pulled away and she liked you, only then did she realize how much she liked you.

[@maheshpai7781]

Roger and Elaine's story was almost Shakespearean level 😂😂😂😂😂

[@Samthegreatandpowerful]

My friend actually liked me and I had no idea until they started sending secret notes to me in my locker, giving me a heat attack and severe anxiety, until I realized that it was them sending the notes.

[@reedy_9619]

If you had a « heat » attack i take it to mean the notes definitely worked lol. The whole thing is making me question a lot of interactions i had as a teen. Was angry and probably depressed. I used to take any normal positive interaction as either a lie or politeness (more often than not a lie and politeness when i was in a good mood). I still don’t know wether that had merit or not. I d often come across girls from my class in the hallway and they’d smile. Still don’t know if it was just acknowledgement or superficial friendlyness (i mean that as openness, not lying) I think i really managed to fuck myself up through my own reactions to earlier bad interactions. And it s been 7 years, fuck im old

[@JPNephran]

Story 30 hit me on a personal level, catching a girl at work staring at me. Feels kinda awkward though.

[@lollojojjo6612]

1 minute 8 stories. Gotta write some notes

[@KeganSmith-j3m]

"OH NO, IM LATE FOR AN OIL CHANGE" the best analogy ever

[@AMC08]

Story 3 is me on a daily basis bruhh I am so awkward like that

[@mrpotchh]

I like how he already got to 7 stories in less than a minute

[@LCCWPresents]

Rodger, what Elaine is saying is she needs a horse for her buggy

[@FastnOut]

Fr. With those transmission problems Roger has been having, the horse wouldn't be that bad

[@AAA-qk1vl]

7:12 thought that was the end of the video

[@bobber1no499]

all i can think about is that czechoslovakia hasent existed since the soviet union fell Sorry 😂

[@ThatNerdGuy0]

I've actually experienced story 28, I'm currently in the depressive spiral chapter

[@nekimi__]

Roger and Elaine's story was an absolute gem

[@skarmex3439]

I am 98% confident I have never seen any of these indicators before, which confirms something I sadly already knew...

[@ThymeLeaves_]

Fr 😔🙏

[@AydoCY]

That guy from story 25 but "Dude shes just not that into yooooooooooooooouuuu gotta move oooooon move ooooon"

[@animetalk8132]

S8 was lovely tf

[@BOTWfan69403]

13:57 - 15:12 I’m done😔. What’s actually messed up is that when I would talk to my friend about me and my crush I would call myself “apple”and my crush “book.” So the fact that it’s A and B just hits even harder. She is quite literally the girl of my dreams, and it hurts to know that nobody can fill the cup that is her.

[@mrobseqium]

roger is so cool, i wanna be friends with him. i too would tihnk like him if i were in that situation

[@itsogshow]

If she yells, “what the fuck are you doing in my house” she def likes you

[@glitchingbee]

12:13 I like your funny words, magic man

[@corruptzane2007]

The "that smile" from story 10, 6:32, its pretty true, from my own experience, if you look at someone you have no contact with at all but see every day such as job or school schedule, but you find yourself holding back a smile to the point of turning away and hiding, its probably a crush. And, if you dont smile often and, when you do, its as if you're forcing yourself to, but when you smile at the sight of that person in a way that you can't recreate without feeling embarrassed of even trying or just not being able to at all after you lose the smile, probably a crush.

[@argentino67]

"kicking dirt at you on the playground and running away" the 50 something weird guy: 'yippee'

[@BasedSmoky]

Who else doom watches this seeing something you will never have

[@bruhmoment5203]

✋

[@theperson679]

amazing video!!

[@JoshuaEckert-yf8gc]

You know what would scream I have a crush on you, if you actually screamed I have a crush on you

[@sithLinkGaming]

The girl who was sitting at the bar was just freaking out about how well that worked

[@datboiwes3495]

Story 8 is too on point

[@AShadowGamer7]

Bro told me that no one has a crush on me in 69420 different languages 💀

[@boonyakornthanpanit7656]

Story 28 is so true, especially the part that says A is upset after they realize they hurt B

[@eksbocks9438]

-They actually focus their attention on you. Instead of just the usual greetings. -Touching your hand or upper arm. Like you would see in the movies. -"Let's say for example. If you and I got married...." Even with people who aren't social, they will still give off some hints. They might try and talk with you one-on-one. You might catch them staring at you. Or they'll do something unexpected to catch your attention.

[@Pmeawesome]

Story two be wild!

[@dariussonofjazzlin7433]

The comparing hands thing happens to me often when there are girls that have tiny hands and they just have to see the difference with my large hands. Their reactions are always funny as hell.

[@NoIdiotHere]

I am completely different than story sixteen whereas with my significant other i am very open and outgoing usually but with her I’m a flaming ball of social anxiety

[@mrdojjan]

This just gives me flashbacks to when i was in art class with a few friends. We started talking about puberty and one of the girls told me that she barely had any pubic hair. I didnt know how to react to that one.

[@littlelucas553]

Nah story 25 is wild

[@BigBoris]

I only just realised the second point applies perfectly to this girl I knew in high school. We sat next to or near each other in pretty much every class and she always laughed at the things I said. I had a bit of a crush on her but I never did anything about it.

[@jom1718]

Yea relatable. Pretty much all of high school and middle school I never was confident enough in myself to do anything even tho in hindsight there were plenty of girls that dropped hints and were gettable. I remember one of my first crushes we would stare at each other all day in classes and it led to nothing lol. Wild. Nowadays I think I'm somewhat confident and good at reading but there's much less opportunity it feels...

[@JanitorOfTheStrawhats]

I feel like if I’ll grow up I’ll become Roger…

[@ThrowMeUnderTheBus-Main]

If? I hope you do continue life

[@JanitorOfTheStrawhats]

@@ThrowMeUnderTheBus-Main I sure do plan on doing that

[@rinokumera5907]

Story 8 was amazing lol

[@TravisConnors]

i got no sleep last night story 8 had me ROLLIN🤣💀

[@Omesa1200]

Me with negative values of confidence with this kind of stuff

[@ethanpease5936]

10:22 that always winds up being me. I never get someone else stsrting a conversation. I wonder if I should even bother talking to people.

[@quinnivia]

5 and 6 are so unhinged lmao

[@Gewehr-98]

5:02 Czechoslovakia doesn't even exist anymore. The country split in 1993.

[@feroxultimate3711]

As a Slovakian🇸🇰, I can confirm.

[@CoolIdiotSandwhich]

It was past tense

[@deadbeatSad]

Roger us the most Allofus Everyman I've ever heard of. Truly a gift to the bros and the girlies. I need to know about that Tennis match it sounded nasty. There is no horse.

[@ignisjin]

The Elaine and Roger story sounded like a SNL skit

[@max_garcia]

that 13 y/o kid knew what he wanted very well.... good news is he knew what he wanted.... bad news is he knew what he wanted. Tragic

[@Und3rcov3r]

Story 8 was really well written, damn

[@Shft-T4b]

I want a continuation of Roger and Elaine's story, just because I want to hear about what happens when he takes his car to the garage.

[@djk5758]

"make sure that you avoid at all costs" oh fuck, too late

[@ravensden1771]

That one where the guy had a restraining order threatened against him sounds like he was stalking her than anything

[@flyingsierra180]

Story 33 sounds a little to familiar to me, I do that to freak out my co - workers who don't know me and Its how I show affection to my close friends lol

[@mztweety1374]

Me at every Prince concert I've been to...

[@gundamloverjk]

Roger's going to places, probably not to Elaine's, but places.

[@whatsawhizzerwebnovels4927]

I cant get the dating, not exclusive mindset. Like, how can you go on a date with one person one night and another another night? I find it disrespectful. I mean, if you date and want to go on another, focus on that, and if you dont, move on.

[@KurisuNo1]

I agree

[@offdazaza2769]

Many people can't, it's a mystery to those who think like what you said and it's clear-cut to the people who do that.

[@Chee5e]

Story 16 feels toooo realatable for me .__. im like that guy

[@mjk_rick1869]

Nah the second one was wild bro

[@belckroz1952]

Girl laughing when I tell her my mom died actually happened to me. Worse part I'm the one with the crush on her 😅

[@SP.unknown]

12:46 Just sounds like you can't take no for an answer, honestly.

[@vizizm]

me watching this to prevent my crush from finding out

[@thatoneguy129]

Anyone else watching this to tell if someone has a crush on you

[@NaurPor]

When the girl says "I like you. Please date me."

[@RavenKaylor-gy9dh]

What screams "I have a crush on you?" Me. Me to every single girl I see.

[@Simkets]

No one has ever had a crush on me... 😢

[@Mr.E_ssd]

I feel called out..

[@Jbob_17]

I feel called out after listening to story 21 😭 😭