The First Guy - CRIME COMPILATION

Hi there hello I'm away on my honeymoon for two weeks, so please enjoy this compilation of crime-related First Guy videos! Back to new sketches when I return!
00:00 - The First Guy To Ever Commit A Crime
02:20 - The First Guy To Ever Punch Someone
05:33 - The First Guy To Ever Kidnap Someone
09:17 - The First Guy To Ever Rob A Bank
12:39 - The First Guy To Ever Go To Prison
15:52 - The First Guy To Ever Hire An Assassin
19:30 - The First Guy To Ever Shoplift
23:12 - The First Guy To Ever Solve A Crime
26:41 - The First Guy To Ever Vandalize
30:05 - The First Guy To Ever Take A Hostage
Also please click the subscribe button and turn on notifications so I can feed my cats and dog.
Twitter/Instagram: @TheRyanGeorge

[@RyanGeorge]

Hi there hello I'm away on my honeymoon for two weeks, so please enjoy this compilation of crime-related First Guy videos! Back to new sketches when I return!

[@Fharaway]

Ok

[@mrax5570]

bye

[@magic716_]

First Jk

[@Luis-Sosa]

Cool

[@toiletjoseph4167]

W

[@dogmgee3206]

I love that Ryan’s version of banks are just big piles of money in some random office

[@GayFesh]

the first guy to invent a safe hasn't happened yet

[@dan_asd]

@@GayFesh i was going to the first guy to say that but i guess i am the first guy to be infuriated at not being the first guy to say that

[@canadadry5449]

Okiloveyoubye

[@my3dviews]

You mean they're not? 🤔

[@ExpensivePizza]

Don't worry. Banks don't actually have your money. They used it to buy government bonds and now those bonds are worth less than they paid for them. It's all fine.. as long as you don't want to get your money out.

[@coacht8121]

Ryan has committed so many crimes at risk of being arrested just for the sake of our entertainment. Mad respect.

[@wayneanderton4953]

He won't get arrested. He'll be locked in a room for some time

[@REDACTED.O5-13]

waiting for a r/wooosh

[@Massfig]

@@REDACTED.O5-13here you go, what do you mean Put IN A RoOm you sound stupid, ya doofus.

[@AdamL134]

He gets so many real police in his videos , if they catch on they'll be so mad.

[@Gildedmuse]

One of these days, Ryan is going to have him arrested.

[@amn1308]

"good news, everybody stops being an alive person eventually." Such a dark line delivered so upbeat

[@MKDumas1981]

Like the song "Semi-Charmed Life"?

[@scary-goth-mother]

The "love you, bye" catches me off guard every time 😂

[@slowodanx]

I spat out my fucking drink laughing.

[@louiswhite4395]

9:07 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@manuelius6306]

My friend sometimes says that in the supermarket to the cashier, it's so fricking funny

[@louiswhite4395]

Imagine saying that to your friends at school

[@geraldwoodard2993]

Same here 😂😂😂😂

[@bowlofboyo]

doing a backflip, snapping someone's neck and ruining everyone's day has to be the best crime

[@LisaRamseyArt]

I think he thought he was saving the day I decided.

[@mattphillips3537]

They should make several thousand movies and TV shows about it.

[@FractalNinja]

It was the first assassin, the guy who hired him made him think he was a bad guy 😯

[@MKDumas1981]

The "wearing someone's face as a mask took me a second, but I caught on pretty quickly.

[@nowey5203]

That was probably a reference to the guy that invented fiction

[@YonkoDGoofy]

Watching all of these in a row makes me really appreciate how complex the Ryan Cinematic Universe really is 😂😂

[@bent3736]

I think he needs to start videos off with a "previously on the RGCU"

[@LedionZogaj]

😂

[@djreid645]

​@@bent3736does anybody see the wolrd trade center I went there once idk why they replaced it

[@user-kw3zu3fn7z]

Theres even a Lore if you go to the First Guy to go to Prison Video he Says he Stole someone's Hat a bunch so the Videos a connected

[@youknowwhoiam2771]

Seeing as how Ryan is away on his honeymoon you can imagine how his wedding went - Priest: “Do you take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife?” Ryan: “Yes, sir, I do”

[@OddCanuck420]

"I'm going to take this woman to be my wife I decided"

[@gordahnculous]

Then he did a backflip, snapped the priests neck, and saved the day

[@morganseppy5180]

Wow wow wow wow.... Wow

[@the_once-and-future_king.]

"Oh taking this woman is Tigh.." "Nope" "Whoops." "Whoopsie!"

[@SirGa1ahad]

@@the_once-and-future_king. "this woman is tight!"

[@Goodbrew84]

Imagine living in a world so peaceful and serene that somebody tying you up and gagging you isn't even traumatic, your response is just, "oh this must be a misunderstanding."

[@Roberlink44]

'The First Guy' universe is like if humanity died out, but the infrastructure's still there, then a bunch of clones woke up in a lab, escaped and are now trying to figure out how a society functions.

[@becominghero9754]

Oh m g this sounds awesome

[@MKDumas1981]

Solid Ryan, Liquid Ryan, Solidus Ryan, and Revolver Ryan. All are genetically modified offspring of Big Ryan.

[@ReverseZoom25thCentury]

Sounds like the plot of horizon zero dawn

[@ERROR-uk9uc]

If the infrastructure is still there then why are the twin towers there? Check and Mate.

[@jatmanTorr]

Underrated comment 👍

[@snacking5908]

I want a full movie where Ryan plays all the characters and he just changes his mustache and shirts 😂😂😂

[@CosmicAggressor]

Already the best movie ever.

[@humanperson9443]

And glasses

[@youthfulgreenbeast3851]

What I want is a movie of a normal guy trying to escape the Ryan verse

[@mutteri1298]

Ryan needs to see this

[@verukasault9065]

And hats!

[@billbillinger2117]

"I already ate my lunch money!" Another fellow guy...just out here winging it.

[@humanperson9443]

How do you do fellow human? Please send us your fleshiest limb.

[@horatioprout429]

It was followed by the joke of I already ate after being offered prize money

[@THATGuy5654]

"I think you're supposed to use that money to buy your lunch." "Well, nobody told me that! I'm just winging it out here!" I think that still remains the most relatable line in any of Ryan's work.

[@loadapish]

U eat money?

[@Xavior12]

​@@loadapish Do ... Do you not?

[@qwertypixelYT]

@@loadapish you dont eat money? you seem like the odd one here...

[@dracula0]

​@@loadapishyeah, like everyone else

[@shanesullivan460]

Congratulations, Ryan! You truly are The First Guy to Create a Compilation of Seminal Moments in the History of Crime to Commemorate His Own Wedding!

[@user-gn1cl9ix7p]

Yeah, probably.

[@jiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii]

That sounds like the wedding should somehow be fitting in thematically?

[@oleksiiammo7832]

You are the type of guy to capitalize (not)every word in a sentence.

[@qwertypixelYT]

@@oleksiiammo7832 not every word- read it more carefully.

[@megachristianx6592]

His wedding?

[@jaymz1758]

This is just what crime is like in Canada. It's a documentary.

[@MckieDs595]

It’s called Many Rooms.

[@Bummerland.Here.I.Am.]

I didn’t even know there was crime in Canada 🇨🇦

[@dextersauve5491]

As a canadian I can confirm

[@MyBiPolarBearMax]

“Your hair is arbitrary” is absolutely my go to insult 😂.

[@sinistrality]

I don't know what that means but I don't like how it makes me feel.

[@Jonah.i_dont_know]

a whole half hour of crime? This has got to be one of the greatest deals of all time!

[@DragonKing5356]

I guess you could call it *a steal*

[@tgtdtmaa]

@@DragonKing5356that joke must’ve been super easy, barely an inconvenience

[@lucasplantzos]

“Your not allowed to put people in rooms against their will so I’m gonna put you in a room against your will” made me hysterical😂

[@KimboKG14]

imagine all the sketches would add up into a movie once you put them in the right order

[@SeriousMn653]

Ryan George: The Movie!

[@sinistrality]

Then he does a pitch meeting for it

[@_sayandas]

Imagine all these guys lined up in prison for lunch, all with the face of Ryan.

[@uglen7420]

Why is the twin towers in the background in the first skit bro

[@gooquestione]

​@@uglen7420 Yeah cause sayandas5033 has all the answers

[@_sayandas]

@@uglen7420 The first guy invented crime, so there was no terrorism before him

[@emwhaibee]

-kang- Ryandom

[@mutteri1298]

Or maybe the first guy who was put in a room did all the crimes in this video

[@s108745]

Watching all Ryan's crime related sketches is now super easy, barely an inconvenience.

[@blahblahsaurus2458]

i would even go so far as to say it's a convenience! it actually took a while to get this far, it's pretty far

[@MKDumas1981]

Oh, really?

[@s108745]

Ooh... Responding to comments months later is TIGHT!!!

[@Soupy_loopy]

The idea of someone wearing a person's face like a mask in a world where everyone has the same face is too much for me to comprehend.

[@Traisas]

lol I didn't get the extra layer to it until you pointed it out. Brilliant

[@EdgarRoock]

6:23 "I'm making them related now." is such a great line to use in a blackmailing situation. Noted down.

[@12HitCombo]

"Hi there, hello" is my favorite Ryan George catchphrase. Everyone focuses on the "Super easy, barely an inconvenience" or a lot of those other Pitch Meeting catch phrases. But I really enjoy "Hi there, hello", there's something wholesome about it.

[@broyce1981]

33 minutes straight of people being put into rooms! Yes, please!

[@mistere.9534]

I want a honeymoon pitch meeting or a "First guy to go on a honeymoon" video

[@makarabaduk1754]

If only so we can get an explanation for the word "honeymoon"...

[@thegallantrayku2677]

"Hi there hello wife" "Yes hi hello" "I know we spent alot of money on this big party but I think we should go somewhere else" "Oh like to our house that we decided we share?" "No I was thinking more like going to somewhere to celebrate that big party we had."

[@nicholasbrown668]

​@@makarabaduk1754i mean its pretty simple, its just a reference the the moon cycle and emotions, no sooner is the moon full than it begins to wane basically saying the first month, or Honeymoon, will be the most passionate and love filled of the marriage, before transitioning into the rest of the cycle and dealing with married life

[@makarabaduk1754]

@@nicholasbrown668 A nice, concise explanation there. But I was really angling for the "Ryanverse" explanation in the tradition of *How Things Got Their Names*.

[@nicholasbrown668]

@@makarabaduk1754 i see i wasn't easy and an inconvenience....gods ive failed Ryan

[@privacyvalued4134]

"Is this like a phone plan issue?" If I ever need to deal with a kidnapping/hostage situation, I'm going to have to remember that one.

[@bttrflymagic]

I guess Assassin Guy wasn’t able to get out of his engagement. Nice of him to still get married for the sake of continuity. Congrats, Assassin Guy!

[@JPgene_]

29:37. "That is a crime-doodle" Stuck in my head so hard

[@PapaSmurf40K]

I have to say, these are the most polite criminals I've ever seen. You can definitely tell Ryan's Canadian lol.

[@Bummerland.Here.I.Am.]

You are correct, I’ve decided

[@edwardmk6539]

When he says “ I decided “ it’s hilarious 😂😂😂

[@Zanmakenninotachii]

half a hour of "the first guy" about crimes? that's a great compilation, I decided

[@smokeystarr]

His comedic delivery is so dialed in. These just keep getting better

[@alaye5583]

This is just a comp.

[@MyBiPolarBearMax]

Its the chemistry between all the actors that does it.

[@favoritemustard3542]

@@alaye5583 yes, & you can see a progression in his craft. 👍👍

[@StephanieJeanne]

The kidnapping one is hilarious! 🤣

[@peterkrug4124]

"Love you, bye!"😁😆😅🤣

[@martind5653]

So basically whole planet of Ryan Georges was born at same time and now they all try to figure out society. Thats my head cannon.

[@PabloLewis-ve6ud]

I love the idea that all people suddenly lost all their memories and woke up and had to figure out how to do all this again

[@alphaomega4968]

That Cop Guy looks exactly like that Producer Guy. I bet he hears that a lot.

[@Sly88Frye]

8:00 I've always loved that part and it's actually why I go back to watch the original skit. The more commanding mustache, it's just so perfect😂

[@fangmcghee-oq5xh]

"I already did...be doin that" #1 Ryan George line ever

[@chatterboxbudgets]

The volume of comments when the video has only been available for 15 minutes cracks me up... but not as much as the videos themselves. Yay for compilations & honeymoons! 🎉

[@NinjaBearFilms]

A 33 minute Ryan George skit… am I dreaming?

[@TheElvenKeys]

yeah

[@InsolventSK]

Wake up. Wake up. Wake up. Wake up

[@jorgemtzb9359]

It’s a bunch of old skits. It says compilation

[@NinjaBearFilms]

@@jorgemtzb9359 listen to my pretend shock at this totally known truth bomb you just dropped.

[@Ballistic2770]

Have a good honeymoon Ryan :) Love your content :D

[@notsohonesttbh]

i love how in these skits everything is existing except what the skit is talking about

[@gregorybronstein]

I know.

[@orlandoparaskeva9398]

In hindsight, that first sketch is what led to me embarking on a life of crime

[@SwordmasterKane]

Watching all these videos in a compilation made me realize how Canadian this entire approach to situations is...

[@FuzzyStripetail]

Questionably punchable face Ryan standing in the middle of the street for 72 consecutive hours was probably the meanest crime that he ever committed.

[@erikarussell1142]

Hi there hello, this is an amazing compilation. I watched all these when they came out and it’s awesome watching this all over again. Ryan is soooo talented funny and awkward. I love how he points out how weird everything is. And it sooo is.

[@SethrenJensen]

27:25 "Now hang on a second, I've got half a mind to call the police about this!" "What's the other half of your mind doin'?" "Holding in a fart. Now you stay right there I'm calling the police!" Congratulations Ryan! Happy Honeymoon! Thank you so much for all the laughs!

[@Mr-Beanz]

What's the other half of YOUR mind doin'?

[@greatazuredragon]

Rewatching things this guy has done before is super easy, barely an inconvenience. ^^

[@dubionite]

I love the idea of a full civilization being built before anyone ever committed crime

[@YossGold]

Seeing them put together like this proves one thing - continuity in the Ryanverse is flawless

[@theblade5615]

19:52 the shoplifter stole an expensive brand name shirt!?! Outrageous!

[@Imjustkendall]

ANARCHY

[@dise8785]

Making compilations is super easy, barely an inconvenience

[@NiZaRiOn]

Wow wow wow.......... Wow wow.

[@RicoTonetti]

Compilations are TIGHT

[@hatyyy]

why do i see this same comment on every video ryan george makes i dont get it

[@RicoTonetti]

@@hatyyy try searching for ryan george pitch meetings and thank me later. Or did i spoil it… Whoopsie

[@c-eb3634]

​@@hatyyy cause looking up the pitch meetings is super easy, barely an inconvenience. Pitch meetings are TIGHT!

[@IsTheMeep]

I feel like Ryan can make tons of these complications since they are always very fun

[@LasseVagstherKarlsen]

Posting an interim video while he's away on honeymoon was super-easy, barely an inconvenience.

[@MozartTheGOAT]

Have I seen every single one of these videos before? Yes Am I going to watch this video anyways? Yes

[@rileymosman2808]

I forgot about the shoplifting one, I'd watch a feature length Jurassic Park with Ryan playing all the parts and swearing a lot. Hell, I'd actually pay good money to own that

[@wamrainc176]

Thanks! I have been thinking, what about “the first guy to steal someone identity” with your brilliant mind I am sure you can make an amazing sketch out of it. But beside that I truly appreciate you as an Amazing KZbinr my friend.

[@nhmooytis7058]

Enjoy your honeymoon! Glad Screenwriter Guy and Producer Guy finally tied the knot.😊

[@matthennessy146]

Even when crimes happens in the Ryan George universe everyone so polite they listen to each other’s solutions & they never interrupt each other 😂😂😂

[@vphiameradisogaarwa]

Hope there are more of these "First Persons" coming, they are hilarious!

[@dominicroberto2766]

What's the name of the song that plays in between the videos?

[@agdtwinkie001]

👀👀👀

[@moonbow3641]

👀👀👀

[@BillyBobJoeJonson]

i love the phrase "im going to put you in a room for this"

[@greysintabb7785]

I love how Ryan can turn the worst situations into a casual conversation😂

[@RUClassicallyTrained]

Police Ryan: YOU COMPLETELY DEFACED THAT WALL! Vandal Ryan who literally painted a face on that wall: 👁👄👁

[@ChrisSmith-5655]

If you're really stoned right now, imagine an actual Earth where everyone is actually Ryan and this is how all interactions occur

[@sidhackney8831]

Roger that

[@ValentineS97]

i AM stoned rn and i cannot fathom a world so chaotic 😅😂

[@Knightwing785]

"I'm Probably gonna do a Murder on you!" 😂😂😂

[@Imjustkendall]

what?? you should be put in a room over that i decided.

[@WiloPolis03]

Congrats on being the *First Guy* to go on a honeymoon Ryan!!!!

[@WiloPolis03]

@__The_ryan_george Obvious scam is obvious

[@ouchman4212]

yay, finally a compilation! it's great to be able to listen to them consecutively without having to choose the next one. Congrats on the wedding too!

[@NthDoctorWho]

My favorite crimepilation.

[@Coriolanus_Snow]

The hat fit the "thief" way better than the original owner.

[@norishimogawa6125]

Thats what the ryan media wants you to believe

[@DragonKing5356]

True

[@gabrieljordan8015]

I just burst out laughing at the gym during the kidnapping scene now everyone thinks im a weirdo

[@courtneyevie]

ryan has a real talent for describing things in ways that don't explain what it is at all but we all still know exactly what he's talking about.

[@kurisutofusan]

I love the feel-good world these characters live in, and I especially love when they say "We/I decided."!

[@mhoey321]

"Just let me do me" "You nabbed a man, say it right" "No!" 😂

[@bronsoncarder2491]

I'm a simple man, I see a new Ryan George video and I click on it.

[@Imjustkendall]

ur not a man

[@bronsoncarder2491]

@@Imjustkendall you got me, I'm actually a lizard.

[@Randomperson-dq3un]

The compilation we never knew we needed

[@geustaccount5908]

"What's the other half doing?" "Holding in a fart." Most relatable thing ever

[@Reubentheimitator6572]

I didn't know I wanted 'The First Guy compilation - CRIME COMPILATION', and now I have it, so I have joy. Thank you, O Ryan George.

[@omartaj7010]

Congrats Ryan and have a good one! Meanwhile I and everyone else are laughing our heads off. Thank you for the laughs.

[@thesithcynic3398]

The compilation we needed, but didn’t deserve

[@HandyHanderson]

*_The first guy to ever make a compilation!_*

[@metalchickenproductions332]

Ryan needs a Cameo in the MCU so it becomes canon that an entire world of Ryan Georges exists in the Marvel Multiverse. Your move Hollywood

[@mallygeedkm]

This “Being John Malkovich” universe you’ve created where everyone has the same face is really brilliant.

[@isaacvincent8443]

I love how higher authorities are just people with more impressive mustaches. 😄

[@rome8180]

The misdirect in The First Guy to Ever Punch Someone is such perfect joke structure. "You forced my hand." Balls his hand up into a fist. You think he's about to hit the other guy. "I'm gonna list everything I don't like about your face." Then the other guy hits him.

[@DuckShooter98]

List of crimes and sentences for "the guy" 1. Theft: 5 years 2. Assault: 5 years 3. Kidnapping: 20 years 4. Theft 2x: 5 years 5. Conspriacy: 1 year 6. Theft 3x: 5 years 7. Murder: Life in Prison 8. Vandalism: 5 years 9. Taking a Hostage: Life in Prison Sentance: 2 life Sentances + 46 years

[@mikicrespo4812]

Congrats Ryan! “I do, I decided”

[@TTabbyTT]

That hat thief started a saga

[@TerryOnTuesday]

YASS! Your wife has put you in a room for two weeks, she decided.

[@TheElbowMerchant]

The best part of honeymoons are mostly spent in rooms, to be fair.

[@SpazPhoenix]

Appreciating Ryan’s brilliance while he’s off honey-ing the moon (congrats btw) is super easy, barely an inconvenience

[@dannygillespie6614]

Truly brilliant commentary on the absurdity of police, property rights, etc.

[@markstill8172]

What?? WOW!!! Congratulations, Ryan! I'm glad that you and the woman who is now your wife decided to do this thing. All the best!!!

[@aaronpitts5127]

This was awesome and I FINALLY heard the line I love so much. "...I decided."

[@sidhackney8831]

"Thoughts were tearing through my head like wildfire. And my ventriloquism is getting better" I need a 10 season serialized show about this cop

[@ZizoLeCalamar]

This is blowing my mind a little bit because some of these were new to me and I thought I've seen all your videos. Great compilation, I like that compilation. Keep 'em coming!

[@user-xg5bl5xh5r]

The funny part is that this isn't a skit. Ryan is just the most ruthless criminal in Canada. 😂

[@ursidae97]

It is nice when the Ryan clones stumble upon empathy.

[@multigameswithryan9215]

I was waiting for something like this :D

[@SvaroAsano]

12:33 I love the idea that pens need to be locked up is based on basically survivor bias