Tessa Turner // How To Survive Akathisia

Tessa Turner is a 32-year-old stay-at-home Mum of 2 from Perth, Australia. Her journey with pharmaceutical injury started in 2020 after a routine surgery and anesthetic, where she immediately developed Akathisia but was misdiagnosed and subsequently poly drugged in a psychiatric hospital setting. After doing her own research she embarked on a journey to taper off the medications which has led her down a path of deep discovery and awakening in the midst of her suffering.
She is passionate about raising awareness and educating others about the risks and dangers of Pharmaceuticals and the Mental Health care system. You can find her on KZbin @beautifullybroken, where she shares her story and hopes to let others going through Pharmaceutical harm know they are not alone.
Tessa’s KZbin Channel, Beautifully Broken: / @beautifullybroken1591
Tessa’s Recommended Resources:
benzobuddies.org/
www.benzoinfo.com/
akathisiaalliance.org/

[@BirdieHaze2207]

The feeling of going insane while you’re sane enough to witness the event.

[@katrinamenzies9398]

💯

[@julieguadalupe6569]

I felt that. Story of my life. Stay strong.

[@katrinamenzies9398]

@@julieguadalupe6569 it’s scary

[@drewott8162]

Great comments by Angie at 37:30. The number one stressor for someone in this situation is that you're called crazy while it's happening. Calling the person crazy and accusing them of having a brain disease is literally the most harmful thing you can possibly do to someone in this situation, and that is ALL psychiatry does. They not only accuse you of being insane, they work as hard as they can to form an "alliance" with your family and loved ones, to make sure EVERYONE thinks you're crazy, and they try to make sure that NO ONE will ever take your side and validate you. They specifically tell your loved ones that you're going to try to convince them you're not "sick," and that the loved ones shouldn't listen to you, but just keep making sure you're taking your drugs. It is hard to imagine that their system is based on anything other than intentional malevolence designed to cause harm. Because they can't possibly just be THAT stupid. But maybe they really are that stupid-- I'm not sure!

[@sarahpearsall2248]

@@drewott8162 It was the GP I saw who did this he said I was physcotic and asked my family member if I had always been this way and they said YES When I refused counselling due to agoraphobia I got sectioned and they wouldn’t listen to me the physchatrist prescribed me quetapine no help to taper off of the Valium

[@alicemason8851]

Thank you for explaining akathisia. For me it's a feeling of deep malaise and discomfort and excess 'energy' inside my body, internal trembling, pain, fear and anxiety in every fibre of my being. Thank you both 💓

[@susanmorgan4151]

Exactly. ❤

[@karliann1]

I explain it as restless body syndrome.

[@sarahpearsall2248]

Is it permanent if it’s not caused by benzos ?

[@sarahpearsall2248]

@@alicemason8851 Do you feel extreme exhaustion but your body won’t allow you to nap ?

[@allencollins6031]

Bless you both.. 🕯🕊

[@mirenhary1566]

excellent and excellent advise at the end about taking notes about doctor visit information. I no longer go into a doctor alone.

[@jenniferbryn]

I literally just found out about benadryl a few days ago and found this channel today. I have been going through this since 2020 after a crash and destroy medical experience in mid 2019 - Feb 2020. I was taken off high dose Lamictal/Lexapro/Ambien/Xanax/opioids with no taper. I'm just realizing now how much brain trauma i must have. I'm having flashes of self-realization and starting to look for others. I didn't realize any of this was something. I've been telling friends/family that i felt tortured by our medical system..and knowing others have had similar experiences makes me feel better. My thoughts are so scattered and ephemeral. I feel emotionally emaciated but lucky to be alive.

[@AngiePeacockMSW]

Watch the film “Medicating Normal.” It’s free on KZbin. My story is in the film. It will help you make sense of what happened to you. I’m so sorry.

[@lonnievisch6009]

Hi Tessa. Follow you already on youtube ( Angie too). Two beautiful people. So very sorry when I hear you telling you’re full story. Hold on! Take care! Big hug!❤ ( woman Europe 43 months off AD almost healed)

[@sarahpearsall2248]

@@lonnievisch6009 Did you taper off your AD? Which one did you take?

[@sandrajohnson2491]

Many thanks, Tessa for telling your story. It’s helped me more than you’ll ever know. Stay strong!!

[@ashleychristie5023]

An antiemetic got me too, girl. One dose through IV. I luckily stopped trusting the docs and trying “helper meds” after one month out, so I’m now one year off everything and healing. So damn slowly, but healing for sure. I’m so sorry you went through this.

[@karenrehm9423]

Thank you for sharing 🙏❤️

[@jackiegerspachhas4237]

Thank you TESSA!!!!!!♥️♥️♥️♥️

[@aprilhassell1747]

I was not on birth control but I know just having a period come in withdrawal worsens the symptoms and daily functioning

[@user-xg4dk3ch6y]

You are fantastic both of you!!! ♥️ THANK YOU 🙏♥️

[@jackiegerspachhas4237]

I thank GOD for you Angie!!!!!!♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️

[@timber1978]

Angie, all you do for education is wonderful for us people, that suffer so hard. I want you to know that we listen to you from Oversea. Greetings from Germany! Thumbs up for all warriors and I hope this will pass for us all!

[@AngiePeacockMSW]

Danke!!!

[@jaclynpeters3892]

Thank you Angie and Tess. Sending you both much Love. ❤

[@user-lm7hl8zr8q]

God work Angie 💜

[@morgan6468]

Great interview! Thanks for speaking out you guys. ❤

[@susanmorgan4151]

Thank you for this. I watch your videos to glean any little bits of encouragement available. ❤

[@lonnievisch6009]

Two beautiful woman. Hold on Tessa we will all heal like Angie. And so sweet what you’re mother said❤❤

[@HeatherHubbard-ny8ir]

Great interview. A bit triggering but also hopeful. Thank you to you both!

[@missamazed11]

I only just found out about Akathisia and it’s exactly what happened to me last summer, i’ve always had anxiety and went through a bad episode of it and insomnia so I went to my doctor for medication, I can’t remember what he first prescribed me but I didn’t think it was making any difference so I asked to change medications, unfortunately (and this was something to be fair he really didn’t recommend) I ended up going on and off a few different medications over a couple of months so I don’t know which one (or if multiple ones) gave me Akathisia. It’s something i’ve never experienced in my life and to describe it as hell on earth would be an understatement! For 3 months I felt like my body was burning from the inside and I literally wanted, no needed to claw my way out! I started cutting my arms (something i’ve never done) because I felt so agitated. I couldn’t sit still and had to keep pacing for hours every day, if I tried sit still my body became unbearable. and then the terror.. I still can’t even do justice to describe the feeling of sheer TERROR I felt every single day. Logically I knew I was safe but I couldn’t process it that way at all, I just felt terror of the scales every waking moment of my day until i’d somehow (probably sheer exhaustion) manage to crash out to sleep for maybe 5 hours of sleep but then i’d wake up feeling the terror again and the whole day of terror and agitation and pacing would start again and hours of wailing crying. This was every day for months. The worst part was feeling like something inside of me had broken and it would never be fixed and i’d be stuck this way forever, it was unbearable to imagine that and taking my life became a frequent thought, not because I wanted to die but because I needed the torture to stop. (i’ve since heard people have taken their lives over this and it really breaks my heart knowing exactly how they were feeling) I lost all joy and feelings so happiness, I didn’t laugh or smile for months, I was like a tortured zombie. Nobody including my doctor knew what was wrong and thought it must be my anxiety. My parents took me to the ER twice because I was so bad and telling them I was going to take my life (I’d never had any history of anything like this in my 30+ years, anxiety yes but nothing like this) I felt like I was going insane and couldn’t understand why. Eventually I checked into a psychiatric hospital (again no history of anything like this before) and thankfully they were able to help me. It’s almost a year on now and i’d say i’m maybe 70/80% back to normal. Hopefully i’ll get to 100% and it’s just a slow process but I do sometimes worry i’ll never get fully back there. I still have ptsd from it and see a therapist regularly. It’s only recently I found the name for what happened to me. If there’s a support group anywhere I’d love to join. I don’t even think my comment reflects how horrific Akathisia is and the worst torture of the mind, I’m sending all those who went through it so much love and for anyone going through it now just know it can and will get better please don’t give up.

[@michellefuqua9582]

Yes, good comment

[@jessthemess0o]

This is what I'm going through. I got lucky chatgpt told me what I could have and it all clicked. I'm so sorry you went through this too. I'm on my 2nd week and just trying to hold on

[@sarahpearsall2248]

@@missamazed11 What did they give you that helped?

[@mariaali7404]

Oh just in time one of the most scary scary sitiuation. Thank you angie

[@AlbaLynxQueen]

Great interview. Thanks. I really think that prior Prozac use and CT is what primed Tessa's nervous system and made it more suseptible to akathisia

[@beautifullybroken1591]

Damaged receptors and cns play a part for sure. But I also have a genetic snp of my CYP450 so I cannot metabolise certain drugs.

[@aprilhassell1747]

​@@beautifullybroken1591blood work discover that?

[@allencollins6031]

You all are brave.

[@AngiePeacockMSW]

The bravest of the brave.

[@allencollins6031]

@@AngiePeacockMSW 3.3 here timewise. Just getting there. I dunno. Its one thing to get thru it and another to deal with fallout

[@sylviadominguez8327]

Hi thank you for sharing your story I appreciate it. You mentioned it continues to come back. How many years before remission?

[@AngiePeacockMSW]

Everyone is different. Mine hasn’t come back. Tessa’s comes back in waves. She is still tapering.

[@jessthemess0o]

It is hard to explain. I knew something was wrong and I thought I was overdosing. I'm on day 15 or 16?? Just trying to make it. Thank you for sharing.

[@user-dn6mb7qd6q]

Glad u survived this🙂i have severe air hunger so the terror makes me feel like im suffocating more!! Wanna scrram!! Body on fire n so scared n pamic!! Nose throat n ears fieele like on fire too.

[@clarebarrett9323]

❤️

[@user-dn6mb7qd6q]

I just developed this like 4 days ago. Ctd off k... Body cold, tinglingly, pins n needles, n skin crawling, extreme terror, restlessness..nose throat n ears feel like on fire. I wanna die from this😭feels like face is being pushed against n suffocating!

[@katrinamenzies9398]

💜

[@sylviadominguez8327]

Can you share it again the support groups you are in or were in please

[@AngiePeacockMSW]

I host some on my website: www.angiepeacock.com

[@shan4145]

Omg yes when Tessa said I can say the A word ! Because I can say the s whole word .

[@Victoria-uq8mf]

Where do we find the articles to educate our doctors?

[@AngiePeacockMSW]

I have a free letter you can download to share with them: docs.google.com/document/d/1Tlw-xEpRWk_K6177V_A_xnfbUUHq2n_ktdeFr3Un4-s/edit

[@mauilogic1679]

its called riding the 🚲 bicycle......Opiate/withdrawl......

[@Jwks91]

For me it seems to be pressure and electric current and vibration spreading from the back of my head down my body. And weird feelings like an internal burn or itch seem to be a part of this too. Not many people describe this and I am scared I am worse than them. After my setback made me worse 1,5 years ago I am still getting worse as I had a few different meds and was pregnant through this. It’s been 10 months since my c-section and I am the worst I have ever been that began in January. 😢 It’s hard to have hope when this happens. I am not sure if there is a bottom to this well.

[@beautifullybroken1591]

I have the same symptoms. Most people do. I find seeing the chiropractor can help at times with my cervical spine pressure and electricity feeling. There is an end, you just need to leave your body alone as much as you are able to. Hormones play a huge part in our brain chemistry but they will even out eventually

[@Jwks91]

@@beautifullybroken1591 I watched your videos, I have similar things definitely. A chiro helped me a bit with head nerve pain that sometimes gets bad as a result of the pressure. I can’t wait to get better!

[@user-dn6mb7qd6q]

Sorry you're going thru this! How r u now?

[@jessthemess0o]

This is what I feel. It's like vibrations of like a snake going all the way down my neck to my ribs. I have to sit bent over, curled up and just rock back and forth. It's all the keeps me from losing it. Have any of you guys gotten better? Hugs and love to y'all

[@sarahpearsall2248]

@@jessthemess0o I have to sit hunched over too It’s torture I feel like I’m getting worse I did have severe head pressure that’s eased but I feel extreme fatigue and I don’t feel safe when I was healing from Valium I felt safe indoors and I could distract I never expected aka like I am now thanks to not remembering that time and low histamine would of helped my set back

[@Filthycoffin]

I have had akathisia since 2009 from iv reglan I took for three months on a pick line for hyper emesis during my first pregnancy. My daughter shakes and moves Also now. I was put on ssri and benzo ctd the lexapro because I thought it was giving me the restlessness and making me want to drink beer all the time I never even liked alcohol, but I was using the alcohol to keep the shakes and the inner trimmers at bay and still had akathisia I was prescribed Cipro several times and I stayed on that stupid Klonopin for 12 years and I was more cold turkey multiple times. I never knew that drug was a bad drug then I got poly drugged because of Cipro and being cold turkey in 2018 then I got to ct all the new poly drugs and multiple sedatives that the doctors prescribed for what they thought was bipolar schizophrenia because I could not sleep from needing to move and I complained that my skin burned. I have had acathisia for over 14 years now

[@AngiePeacockMSW]

I always enjoy reading your comments. Some may be scared by this one. Can you perhaps explain how you experienced aka back then and up until now? Some might read this as “omg they had AKA FOR 12 years??!! That’s going to be me!” So, can you just help calm some scared readers down by explaining a bit more? Thank you so much. I try to keep fear as low as possible on my channel and in comments.

[@Filthycoffin]

Thanks I always enjoy watching your stuff and reading some of the things you’ve done I had asked you questions in the past, and you answered me and I am grateful for thanks for doing what you’re doing for other people we gotta look out for someone I can’t help ourselves help someone else because that initially helps us also I had different medication’s like stated, so it’s a different circumstance than just coming off of the benzo, but that’s due to ignorance of knowing about Pharma being fucking bad. Aja wasn’t bad bad until taking off the high dose of a benzo and being put on Latuda. Antipsychotics and benzos I’d have to say take the cake. I am not as bad I am better. It was really fucking bad there for a while. I didn’t know what was wrong with me. I thought I was fucking dying but it’s better and I work now every day and do shit I even worked at six months out post cold turkey at Dollar General . I’ve had other job since then I would have to save my favorite one was driving the tram for the zoo, and working with the animals

[@suecobb-werner]

Once someone gets akathisia, does this make tapering any medication (SSRI specifically) harder? Also can taking other medicine during your taper can trigger akathisia?

[@AngiePeacockMSW]

It depends on the person. The reason many of us slow taper is to try to prevent it from occurring (or re-occurring).

[@Handey79]

Can you tell us more about birthcontrol and benzo?

[@AngiePeacockMSW]

I can only say that the women I coach who are on HRT or BC have an extremely difficult time tapering it, it seems to complicate their withdrawal, and was usually given because the doctor failed to recognize their symptoms of med harm. Many have to taper it but BC usually cannot be tapered so they go off in the “off week” and stay off. That can cause some worsening in withdrawal symptoms for many of “rock the boat” as it did with Tessa. Most women I work with have to come off it even though they might not want to, they just find themselves adverse to it, probably from the hypersensitized state of their nervous system during this. It sucks all around.

[@aprilhassell1747]

​@AngiePeacockMSW women should deal with a few hot flashes but be able to transition into menapause. But not the case for a lot of women. Dr. Elizabeth Bright seems to think its because women aren't eating enough fat and meat. Whole other subject. They use ssri when women cant adjust. What is their root cause? We know very little about menapause. But some women swear by their HRT

[@Handey79]

@@AngiePeacockMSW Thanks for your response, that sucks. I now also use benzo because I have had very severe withdrawal symptoms from antidepressants for months. They had me reduce the last 5 mg too quickly to 2 mg at once. and some say that HRT helps with tapering off. mainly antidepressants but also benzo. I also want to phase out that. it really sucks yes! I have also been living in a terrible hell for 3 months, I don't know if I can keep this up anymore😭 they have finished and built up too much for me in a short time. and also with drops then I had to go back to the old dose but it did not get better after 4 weeks. and then the pharmacist said with liquid you never get the same amount, sometimes it can be 5 mg, other times 7 because drops are never the same size. so I was given a tablet and now I have to stabilize on it, but I have been taking tablets for 3 weeks and it is only getting worse. I have not been functioning for 3 months and am sinking deeper and deeper😭

[@Uma921]

@@aprilhassell1747I’m not sure what the answer is, but my mother and all of my female ancestors transitioned to menopause without pharmaceuticals and I intend to do the same. I think it’s also important to differentiate between progestin and estrogen birth control and HRT. Some women swear by estrogen, but I haven’t heard anything good about progestin or progesterone, especially in the withdrawal space. I had the Mirena IUD in for 4 years and it has absolutely wreaked havoc on my body and hormones. I had it removed November of last year.

[@fennax17]

How do you think about neurofeedback in WD?

[@AngiePeacockMSW]

I'm nervous about it. I tried it and swear it made me a little worse for a bit, so I quit. I think the brain is in a really plastic state during this injury. Like more than regular people. So I just worry about the quality of some of those programs and if it is truly rewiring correctly. I don't think anyone knows, for sure. It's a very new technology.

[@fennax17]

@@AngiePeacockMSW thanks for your answer 😄

[@sylviadominguez8327]

I know I'm asking a lot of questions but did you use Propranolol? If so did it help you?

[@AngiePeacockMSW]

I took metoprolol for 7 months with aka. Didn’t work. Tried propanol for a few weeks didn’t help. Some say it helps some say nothing happens. Everything can either help, hurt, or do nothing. Just please be careful.

[@sylviadominguez8327]

I noticed that a lot of people take different and lots of different Pharmaceuticals and their symptoms are severe and takes a long time to recover I was on Risperidone got off of that with my system started and then my doctor put me on Lamictal those taken for a short time do you think recovery would be sooner..with akathisia

[@AngiePeacockMSW]

Yes it can sometimes heal faster if you don’t have a long complicated story with multiple drugs

[@JacquiQ]

Angie is cutting V every 14 days "too fast" ? My last tow cuts were 14 days apart and I tolerated them really wee, but 'everyone' on forum keeps saying its too fast. I have been doing this taper 2 1/2 years ( with Holds) and just want off

[@AngiePeacockMSW]

This is too complex a question to answer on social media. I know nothing about your drug history or current state of your health. It would be irresponsible to have an opinion and to state that here. Taper rate and speed is a very individual thing. All I will say is that it’s a balance between “this is rat poison I want it out of my body,” and if you go too fast you will want yo jump off a bridge. Sometimes cuts can be delayed. Sometimes people “bulldoze” through a taper and it blows up in their face and then they have to go back up to get stable again. That really slows them down. You HAVE to listen to your body above all things but do so informed by people who have been doing this a long time, too. It’s tough to know. You could be one that has no problem. Or maybe you’re not. I do not have a crystal ball.

[@JacquiQ]

Thanks Angie @@AngiePeacockMSW

[@Snowflake1374]

Im in severe WD from zoloft. Went to psychiatric hospital. They gave me Immovane 7,5mg for 3 days and Theralen for sleep. Had reaction, inner torture more electric chemical pressure pain in my head agitation crying screaming cant stop, could it be Akathisia from thoose pills?

[@AngiePeacockMSW]

Yes maybe. Watch my other video about setbacks.

[@sarahpearsall2248]

@@Snowflake1374 If you hadn’t been off Zoloft that long they should of got you to re instate that then you would of stabilised

[@Thisisalt5465]

Ma'am I only want a video for blood pressure I'm a 25 year old guy no doc here knows about my problem I'm fed up I'm 79 days out from klonopin CT .... I cannot walk my Bloodpressure goes into hypertensive crisis when I stand.... I can't take meds because when I lay down it gets under control I can't even sit on my bed what can I do

[@AngiePeacockMSW]

Sounds like you are in withdrawal and you have POTS symptoms. Your body will heal but you have to give it some time. Make sure you get your heart checked by medical but if they don’t find anything it’s Klonopin withdrawal.

[@Thisisalt5465]

Thanks ma'am my blood work echo and ECG were normal...❤️

[@rajeshlumb8659]

​@@Thisisalt5465do u fèel svt

[@sylviadominguez8327]

So did you take vitamin B6 magnesium that kind of stuff to help you recover?

[@AngiePeacockMSW]

Helps some not others. Everyone is different.

[@suecobb-werner]

My psychiatrist did some digging with my case of akathisia and she 100 percent believes that’s exactly what I had. She also told me tapering your meds too fast can cause akathisia. Last thing she told me is that I should carry around some Benadryl if I ever am given something that causes akathisia.

[@suecobb-werner]

I can relate so so so much to everything Tess has said. I felt the same 😔 happened two years ago from Zoloft/Hydroxyzine mix, stopped CT, went to ER, given antipsychotics, stopped those, then put on Lexapro and I’m currently tapering off that at 1.7mg. Took some meds for pain and that chemical akathisia recently popped back in. I feel so stuck.

[@sarahpearsall2248]

@@suecobb-werner How are you coping now?

[@suecobb-werner]

@@sarahpearsall2248 I’m slowly getting better, been holding my dose for 3 months now. Still not close to stabilization but I’m on my way. Having severe internal agitation and restlessness but getting up and moving my body helps b

[@bethgra2007]

I'm in such a bad state with withdrawal akathisia and no idea what to do. I never get relief 😢

[@beautifullybroken1591]

Hold on. This will pass..

[@susanmorgan4151]

Yes , DO hold on! It changes slowly, but DOES change for the better...it takes time.

[@susanmorgan4151]

Drinking a LOT of water has helped me. Magnesium citrate has helped (not for everyone though)

[@Victoria-uq8mf]

Will magnesium glycinate also work?​@susanmorgan4151

[@suecobb-werner]

I’m right there with you. We’ve got to hold on. I hope you have found some relief.

[@rajeshlumb8659]

1103days off now mild dp dr left

[@sarahpearsall2248]

Is Tessa Beautifully Broken woman?

[@AngiePeacockMSW]

Just Beautifully Broken I think.

[@sarahpearsall2248]

@@AngiePeacockMSW I saw her earlier videos where she looked happier but had lots of movement issues in her left leg.

[@syntholshoulders1842]

Horrible drug Angie did you have visual stuff in the morning upon awaking up

[@AngiePeacockMSW]

Yes and falling asleep and throughout the day.

[@michelleandrews5527]

Relapse kzbin.info/www/bejne/g4DSkIuQhN-maas

[@AngiePeacockMSW]

Awe thanks for the shout - out. Keep going Michelle!

[@michelleandrews5527]

@@AngiePeacockMSW hi , I really have to thank you because the days I couldn't get through , like when I was literally on the floor in despair and had no hope of seeing any light .. I saw your videos and you literally gave me a push in the right direction and I stopped believing I was going insane and having this information and research available is literally saving people's lives . You've come so far in your journey and I hope one day I can look back on this and say that I made it . 💯% saved my sanity and your very much appreciated ! ♥️

[@alicereddington5087]

I went cold turkey from paroxatone (Paxil) on it for 5 months and had horrible horrible symptoms I couldn’t taper I was put on mirtazapam for the last month before I went off it. I’m a tarot soul reader I now can’t talk my brain fog is horrendous and the physical symptoms started to go away it’s been 6 weeks no brain zaps but the depression the impending doom is over barring I can’t take much more no dr to help family doesn’t understand I’m 38 2 kids. I never drank now drinking to sleep every night today I got a script for mirtazpam as I can’t use Valium or alcohol anymore Praying this gives me relief then I can taper off it, I went cold turkey from Zoloft after 14 years nothing compares to this complete pain and confusion. I am struggling to type this. Please tell me there is hope and is getting back on mirtazapam a bad idea I am stuck I’d love any advice I’ll never take another one besides the mirtazapam again. Does anyone have any experience with mirtazapam helping?

[@sarahpearsall2248]

@@alicereddington5087 Mirtazapine is evil should be banned in my opinion