Are All Homosexuals Narcissists? (LINK in Description, Othering Failure FEATURE, not BUG)

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@MattWells-k6n 4 ай бұрын

My NPD ex gf was bisexual and dated a lot of girls. Narcs want as much narcissistic supply as possible so they will sleep with both genders as long as it’s a breathing human that is capable of giving them compliments, praise and sex. My ex was covert and very very sadistic when it came to cheating on me she went out of her way to sleep with my friends, my brother or people she maybe I didn’t like just humiliate, embarrass and mock me, all behind my back too while she tried to act like a sweet innocent little angel when we’re together. Except if she got drunk she would completely pull a Jeckyl Hyde and go from this quiet submissive doormat type of gf to a loud, crazy, fn evil person or bet yet monster. Vaknin said when the covert narcissist drinks alcohol it turns them in a psychopath, which I can vouch 100% happens lol.

@benv8185 4 ай бұрын

Mine got bored with just normal cheating and then devised a system such that I would know EXACTLY WHEN she was cheating omfg 😂

@claudiaborralho8887 4 ай бұрын

I strongly believe many bisexuals are narcisistas. Tye more supply the better and they can easily triangulate.

@sneak9407 4 ай бұрын

@@benv8185 I'm sorry, but I laughed like a maniac. She had to one up other narcissists... she's a narcissists prime.

@user-oi3lt7nu8g 3 ай бұрын

@@benv8185 So she wanted to torture you. Incredible. How did you react?

@FoolintheRainSDMF 2 ай бұрын

Mine was the same hence why I got rid of her they can have her she won't be theirs either just their turn and believe me it's not hard to get a turn with her

@JJ-gi7jv 4 ай бұрын

Your explanation of the othering problem in narcissists was genius! Discarding the true self (wow!). I feel like finally better understanding narcissistic behavior and why other people are more emphatic. The emphatic person has not discarded the fragile self, they grew it. Thats why they can relate better to others Thank you so much! fantastic perspective

@blackreazor 4 ай бұрын

Im gay but ive dealth with closeted narcissists. they do have double lives and the ones ive dealth with hated the fact that i was out and ok with my sexuality but they would make weird remarks they would say that i looked "normal" or that they liked that i wasn't "feminine" but they would secretly mess around with transexual women or cross dress themselves. It was a weird power dinamic in some cases. I now try to go out with open and out men.

@TheOmnitom 4 ай бұрын

They have shame problems from being mistreated as kids, I've experienced it too it's weird I only date other men who are confident and out myself too now.

@LauraRONeill 4 ай бұрын

Excellent explanation-thank you for this video.

@mustaphamond3729 4 ай бұрын

Thank you for once again expanding my understanding of internalized objects! And for the insight that othering failure not necessarily is pathological, merely human. Your work is much appreciated.

@YewDuct 4 ай бұрын

Priceless. I just arrived here after a video on picking locks because I've mislaid my key. Othering failure is like the pin that prevents the barrel from being turned being jammed in the open position, so the barrel can always be turned. It doesn't mean that you have the pin combination to open the lock, it's just a necessary precursor.

@BarbicideSmoothie 4 ай бұрын

Thank you, I can see how this parasitic, perverse beyond the emeshment my mom has, could be a form of othering. I appreciate your help so much infusing us with your knowledge🔥

@monikaknapczyk7151 4 ай бұрын

If I feel the other person as "a part of my soul", is it an othering failure? It was heterosexual relation of course.

@samvaknin 4 ай бұрын

Yes. Enmeshment, merger, fusion are othering failures.

@monikaknapczyk7151 4 ай бұрын

@@samvaknin Thanks for your reply Prof. Vaknin.

@art_illeries8274 4 ай бұрын

Mine was proud of people mistaking him for a homosexual because of his habitus and expensive taste. But he said he didn't like other men. It was all just very confusing tbh.

@changingmymind 4 ай бұрын

with a highly sensitive young child, can a mother’s constant and reliable soothing response delay or block development of othering?

@samvaknin 4 ай бұрын

No. Watch the From Child to Narcissist playlist.

@SherrilPerhach 4 ай бұрын

Porn and homosexual relations were a big part of my ex narc life.

@Khaegch-favh 4 ай бұрын

Same

@mec.laurapalmer7155 4 ай бұрын

Did he act like he is hetero with you?

@evab521 4 ай бұрын

Dr Vaknin, what about bisexual people? What happens to the othering of bi's?

@samvaknin 4 ай бұрын

Depends on whether they are mentally healthy and what is their attachment style.

@xochitl7489 4 ай бұрын

Thanks for sharing your knowledge!

@__S__435 4 ай бұрын

Dr. Vaknin, thank you for this. You've talked about how decompensation works in malignant narcissists, along with the other Cluster B states they move through adjacent to that. Do you have any videos, or plan to make any, which contrast this with how decompensation works in non-cluster-B people, and especially how they can use decompensation to slingshot to some better state of psychological wellbeing?

@samvaknin 4 ай бұрын

m.kzbin.info/www/bejne/o3yxkISqg7WaoMk

@Darkguardian823 4 ай бұрын

Nope, but many are. We are the strange gays who look nothing like eachother. White burly bear, and honestly I’m the more fem one, and husband is extremely native and looks fresh off the reservation. Many gays I know, there are some similarities with who they choose to date

@beverleecarrell510 4 ай бұрын

Sam..You are brave..You do not stop at what may disturb weak people...❤

@kolmol9097 4 ай бұрын

U are thr only weak who wanna revenge

@loucorice 4 ай бұрын

15:00 I feel like this would be an argument for a core narcissistic personality. Only solidifying the current ICD's take on cluster B as a whole. There isn't such thing as a "npd/bpd/histrionic personality disorder" only a personality lacking, manifesting as a disorder wearing the mask of a certain personality style

@loucorice 4 ай бұрын

But I also think that certain predispositions mixed with critical experiences tend to shape your personality style. It's not that easy to "choose" a way of symptoms visible

@samvaknin 4 ай бұрын

You may wish to watch the videos in this channel. Search for the relevant playlists.

@erikal1593 4 ай бұрын

Man... Narcissists are next level. They are smart and conniving. I've worked with homosexuals, bisexuals, and trans at Disneyland. They are their own people. Some suck. Some are amazing. I've luckily been with mostly amazing but some a**holes too.

@melindamassey14 4 ай бұрын

Child groomers?